Crappy Construction: The Four POs of the Housepocalypse

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Hobbies, Crafts, & Houses > Crappy Construction: The Four POs of the Housepocalypse

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kastein: Aug 31, 2011; Moderator at http://www.ridgelineownersclub.com/forums/and soon to be mod of AI. MAKE AI GREAT AGAIN. Motronic for VP.

All that photo is missing is Wayne Gretzky's balls.

# ? Dec 4, 2014 16:42

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# ? May 14, 2024 16:23

Blindeye: Sep 22, 2006; I can't believe I kissed you!

Flipperwaldt posted:

Nah, you didn't.

Could the photo have been a really weirdly distorted mosaic? I know somethings doing panoramas with a phone app can make poo poo look weird in small spaces.

# ? Dec 5, 2014 03:45

Flipperwaldt: Nov 11, 2011; Won't somebody think of the starving hamsters in China?

Blindeye posted:

Could the photo have been a really weirdly distorted mosaic? I know somethings doing panoramas with a phone app can make poo poo look weird in small spaces.

It's literally just the extremely exaggerated perspective of a wide angle lens. Barrel distortion has apparently been corrected for very well by the camera. Things farther away, like the corner of the room you see in the middle, seem smaller; things closer by, like the corners of the room left and right, seem bigger. Throw in the angled roofline and the zigzags and your brain shits itself.

The same corner if the roofline weren't angled (shelf and top line of the bird picture in green):

With angled roofline:

# ? Dec 5, 2014 11:14

Ashcans: Jan 2, 2006; Let's do the space-time warp again!

Man, that is so loving bizarre. I stand by the recommendation that everyone have a level, because apparently my brain can't be trusted with much on its own.

# ? Dec 5, 2014 15:53

MrYenko: Jun 18, 2012; #2 isn't ALWAYS bad...

This thread isn't up to code: M.C. Escher approved

# ? Dec 5, 2014 16:38

Bad Munki: Nov 4, 2008; We're all mad here.

Non-Euclidean Construction Tales

# ? Dec 5, 2014 16:39

Deep 13: Sep 6, 2007; "Let's think the unthinkable, let's do the undoable, let's WORK OUT"

I saw this in a waiting room today!

# ? Dec 5, 2014 18:57

kastein: Aug 31, 2011; Moderator at http://www.ridgelineownersclub.com/forums/and soon to be mod of AI. MAKE AI GREAT AGAIN. Motronic for VP.

Hot prong up AND the magical ethernet/phone cable wormhole! I love it.

# ? Dec 5, 2014 19:39

BonerGhost: Mar 9, 2007

Bad Munki posted:

Non-Euclidean Construction Tales

Cyclopean Architecture Thread

# ? Dec 5, 2014 21:37

FCKGW: May 21, 2006

Ashcans posted:

This is why everyone should just own a level, it's almost impossible to gently caress up even if you are someone who can't work out how to measure anything.

Or in this guy's case a baseball, a bear can, just anything that could roll really.

# ? Dec 5, 2014 22:09

CopperHound: Feb 14, 2012

FCKGW posted:

a bear can,

# ? Dec 5, 2014 22:13

Antifreeze Head: Jun 6, 2005; It begins; Pillbug

Crooked shelf? Get yourself a pissed off grizzly with its head stuck in a can. That will make any DIY mixup seem minor in comparison.

# ? Dec 6, 2014 18:40

canyoneer: Sep 13, 2005; I only have canyoneyes for you

Hey, found something in my house that isn't up to code!

Hall bathroom toilet was pissing water out of the TOP of the tank, where the flush lever is. Fill valve was busted and wouldn't shut off the water. Normally, the toilet would just run. But it doesn't just run if you have the overflow valve going up all the way to the tank lid :downs:

The overflow pipe was two inches above the fill valve, rather than one inch below as code and common sense would both dictate

# ? Dec 7, 2014 04:14

slap me silly: Nov 1, 2009; Grimey Drawer

canyoneer posted:

common sense

I found the thing your installer was missing!

# ? Dec 7, 2014 04:34

Indolent Bastard: Oct 26, 2007; I WON THIS AMAZING AVATAR! I'M A WINNER! WOOOOO!

slap me silly posted:

I found the thing your installer was missing!

I disagree. They had common sense, but it was overruled by their utter lack of giving a poo poo.

# ? Dec 7, 2014 04:49

Jeherrin: Jun 7, 2012

Indolent Bastard posted:

I disagree. They had common sense, but it was overruled by their utter lack of giving a poo poo.

Ding ding ding. Absolutely.

Half of my apartment seems to have been built with structural silicon sealant and self-sealing air, put in place by someone whose overriding attitude was WELP GONNA SAW THIS IN HALF WITH A HAMMER

# ? Dec 7, 2014 16:17

Motronic: Nov 6, 2009

Jeherrin posted:

Half of my apartment seems to have been built with structural silicon sealant and self-sealing air, put in place by someone whose overriding attitude was WELP GONNA SAW THIS IN HALF WITH A HAMMER

Because people are incentivized to worth this way when construction jobs are pieced out and priced/bid on by the job.

# ? Dec 7, 2014 16:34

cakesmith handyman: Jul 22, 2007; Pip-Pip old chap! Last one in is a rotten egg what what.

Jeherrin posted:

WELP GONNA SAW THIS IN HALF WITH A HAMMER

For some reason this nearly has me in tears of laughter.

# ? Dec 7, 2014 16:40

ductonius: Apr 9, 2007; I heard there's a cream for that...

Jeherrin posted:

WELP GONNA SAW THIS IN HALF WITH A HAMMER

I have unironically done this at work. It was for demolition so we could replace plywood with steel.

# ? Dec 7, 2014 18:41

old-timey newspaper gal: Feb 23, 2005

Leviathan Song posted:

I think that's actually close to right. look at the zig zag pattern. It's perfectly level with the floor and shelf but way off on the ceiling. The ceiling slopes heavily down from the left to right of that picture. The light probably also messes with perspective a bit.

There is no way in hell that shelf is close to straight. This isn't some Gandalf/Hobbit forced perspective poo poo going on there. Occam's Razor and all that.

# ? Dec 24, 2014 22:40

Idran: Jan 13, 2005; Grimey Drawer

Hot Jam posted:

There is no way in hell that shelf is close to straight. This isn't some Gandalf/Hobbit forced perspective poo poo going on there. Occam's Razor and all that.

I dunno, Flipperwaldt's posts were pretty convincing to me.

# ? Dec 24, 2014 22:55

Shady Amish Terror: Oct 11, 2007; I'm not Amish by choice. 8(

It looks off at first, yes, but as someone who does visual poo poo for a living, I had to take several seconds to look at it and while I don't know if it's EXACTLY level, I think it's actually A LOT closer than it appears at first glance. It looks more like someone who knows what they're doing decided to run a fun-house illusion on that wall in order to gently caress with people, because while I still can't eyeball it out, the perspective lines seem to agree with it being very close to level; I think that either the room's not truly square (and I'm not counting the clear grade of the roofline), or there's some distortion from the camera, however, making it more difficult to gauge.

Shady Amish Terror fucked around with this message at 05:07 on Dec 25, 2014

# ? Dec 25, 2014 05:05

WeaselWeaz: Apr 11, 2004; Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Biscuits and Gravy.

Looking for advice on how to mount a TV in my old rear end basement. It's 1952 construction with drywall over horizontal furring strips, over block wall (I think cinder block, not sure how to tell). No studs that I can find. Potential plasma TV, articulating mount (to extend the TV out a bit), and soundbar would be100+ lbs.

It sounds like I mount plywood, with enough layers to be flush with the drywall (about 2") and attach the mount to that with lag screws or tapcons. I've seen different suggestions for mounting the plywood though, toggles, tapcons, and lead anchors with or without epoxy. Cinder is supposed to be weaker, which is why I saw epoxy suggested. I'll ultimately have a handyman do it, since I don't have a hammer drill, but I want to be sure this gets in right and doesn't look like crap.

# ? Dec 25, 2014 17:40

Johnny Aztec: Jan 30, 2005; by Hand Knit

Sounds like the perfect excuse to buy a hammer drill!

# ? Dec 25, 2014 17:44

slap me silly: Nov 1, 2009; Grimey Drawer

Johnny Aztec posted:

Sounds like the perfect excuse to buy a hammer drill!

Yeah, don't miss this window of opportunity dude.

# ? Dec 25, 2014 17:46

WeaselWeaz: Apr 11, 2004; Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Biscuits and Gravy.

slap me silly posted:

Yeah, don't miss this window of opportunity dude.

If only I had a garage. But even if I do get one, how should I put this thing up?

# ? Dec 25, 2014 18:02

Johnny Aztec: Jan 30, 2005; by Hand Knit

Sounds like a perfect excuse to sell your house and get one with a garage!

# ? Dec 25, 2014 19:19

Bad Munki: Nov 4, 2008; We're all mad here.

Johnny Aztec posted:

Sounds like a perfect excuse to sell your house and get one with ~~a garage~~ enough land to build a full-size shop!

Let's be honest here.

# ? Dec 25, 2014 19:22

Liquid Communism: Mar 9, 2004

You know, that's a question I've been kicking around for a while. What do planning and zoning commissions have against building out shops with an attached apartment?

# ? Dec 26, 2014 01:33

Nitrox: Jul 5, 2002

Liquid Communism posted:

You know, that's a question I've been kicking around for a while. What do planning and zoning commissions have against building out shops with an attached apartment?

Nothing. As long long as you properly document it and pay the necessary fees and taxes.

# ? Dec 26, 2014 01:59

Shame Boy: Mar 2, 2010

The house I grew up in and my parents still live at has a second house on the property that used to be for renting out to people. Its first floor was half garage, half living area, and the top floor was a kitchenette and dining room and small bedroom and bathroom. By the time my parents got the property it had been foreclosed on and the rental house was in disrepair, so they got it pretty cheap considering.

Anyway the first thing my dad did after moving in (before I was even born) was to tear out all that stupid "comfortable living area" on the first floor and make a workshop out of it with all of the aggregated tools and nerd poo poo he's collected over his lifetime. The first project he built there was his ideal vision of a work bench, followed by a :krad:

home-built amplifier (he's an electrical engineer) with four loving 15" subwoofers prominently embedded high in the wall. In order to turn it on you had to flip up some of those red covered toggle switches like you were arming a nuclear bomb, it was pretty great. The top floor living area became the place he could go to work on his hundreds of precisely accurate model rockets (he's a pretty huge :spergin:

if you can't tell), while the bedroom was for naps. Now that I'm living on my own and can't just mooch off his work area and tools I'm really missing being able to, you know, build anything larger than can fit on my four foot long desk in the corner of one room of my apartment that is reserved for project junk and not needed for living area.

# ? Dec 26, 2014 02:58

Wasabi the J: Jan 23, 2008; MOM WAS RIGHT

Parallel Paraplegic posted:

The house I grew up in and my parents still live at has a second house on the property that used to be for renting out to people. Its first floor was half garage, half living area, and the top floor was a kitchenette and dining room and small bedroom and bathroom. By the time my parents got the property it had been foreclosed on and the rental house was in disrepair, so they got it pretty cheap considering.

Anyway the first thing my dad did after moving in (before I was even born) was to tear out all that stupid "comfortable living area" on the first floor and make a workshop out of it with all of the aggregated tools and nerd poo poo he's collected over his lifetime. The first project he built there was his ideal vision of a work bench, followed by a home-built amplifier (he's an electrical engineer) with four loving 15" subwoofers prominently embedded high in the wall. In order to turn it on you had to flip up some of those red covered toggle switches like you were arming a nuclear bomb, it was pretty great. The top floor living area became the place he could go to work on his hundreds of precisely accurate model rockets (he's a pretty huge if you can't tell), while the bedroom was for naps. Now that I'm living on my own and can't just mooch off his work area and tools I'm really missing being able to, you know, build anything larger than can fit on my four foot long desk in the corner of one room of my apartment that is reserved for project junk and not needed for living area.

Sounds like you need to get your poo poo together.

# ? Dec 26, 2014 16:52

spog: Aug 7, 2004; It's your own bloody fault.

Parallel Paraplegic posted:

The house I grew up in and my parents still live at has a second house on the property that used to be for renting out to people. Its first floor was half garage, half living area, and the top floor was a kitchenette and dining room and small bedroom and bathroom. By the time my parents got the property it had been foreclosed on and the rental house was in disrepair, so they got it pretty cheap considering.

Anyway the first thing my dad did after moving in (before I was even born) was to tear out all that stupid "comfortable living area" on the first floor and make a workshop out of it with all of the aggregated tools and nerd poo poo he's collected over his lifetime. The first project he built there was his ideal vision of a work bench, followed by a home-built amplifier (he's an electrical engineer) with four loving 15" subwoofers prominently embedded high in the wall. In order to turn it on you had to flip up some of those red covered toggle switches like you were arming a nuclear bomb, it was pretty great. The top floor living area became the place he could go to work on his hundreds of precisely accurate model rockets (he's a pretty huge if you can't tell), while the bedroom was for naps. Now that I'm living on my own and can't just mooch off his work area and tools I'm really missing being able to, you know, build anything larger than can fit on my four foot long desk in the corner of one room of my apartment that is reserved for project junk and not needed for living area.

Things will all change when he has his idea for the flux capacitor.

# ? Dec 26, 2014 17:50

Liquid Communism: Mar 9, 2004

That's honestly what I want. Something big enough for a floor lift so I can stop working on my Jeep in the slush when the rear end in a top hat device throws a part in mid-winter, and with enough room for all my assorted hobbies. Throw a 1 bedroom cottage on the back and I'm a happy man.

# ? Dec 26, 2014 18:04

Darchangel: Feb 12, 2009; Tell him about the blower!

Liquid Communism posted:

That's honestly what I want. Something big enough for a floor lift so I can stop working on my Jeep in the slush when the rear end in a top hat device throws a part in mid-winter, and with enough room for all my assorted hobbies. Throw a 1 bedroom cottage on the back and I'm a happy man.

If I were single, this would be where I lived.

# ? Dec 27, 2014 05:27