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Citizen Tayne posted:it owns that donald trump has been a massive failure his entire life but is still rich there's this moment in born rich where ivana trump relates a vignette about how during one of the times he was bankrupt, her dad pointed a homeless man out to her as they were leaving the tower named after him and remarked how that man was richer than he was then the cameras followed her around her old room in said tower that had apparently never been touched since she moved out as a teen
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Dec 28, 2014 04:03
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here it is if you haven't seen it yet https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=unZmiEsgzno his followup is called the one percent and is basically the same thing but with better interviews https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HmlX3fLQrEc
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Dec 28, 2014 04:05
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duTrieux. posted:isn't that a book they made a lovely CGI movie to go with it since the people they're trying to convince to act against their own self-interest probably won't read
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Dec 28, 2014 04:23
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fart simpson posted:good idea im too autistic to have considered using human interaction to solve this problem hello new linkedin profile quote
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Dec 28, 2014 04:32
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LinkedIndia
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Dec 28, 2014 04:36
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oh god linkedin trigger warning please
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Dec 28, 2014 04:44
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i've unsubscribed from their mailing lists no less than 5 times but there's always a new one that comes in, it's hosed up
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Dec 28, 2014 04:44
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people offer me so many drat job interviews
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Dec 28, 2014 04:47
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vapid cutlery posted:people offer me so many drat job interviews I get people wanting to help me with my résumé and recruiter trying to break in my industry like no I will not obtain that certification if I get offered that job because I'm not going back to school for four years for a job that pays half of what I'd make if I was still doing field work also who move my cheese has nothing on that fish guys in Seatle video gently caress that BS
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Dec 28, 2014 06:10
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I have  Big 4 experience so I get recruiters hitting me up all the time from the other Big 4 / Smaller firmsI usually reply with a template email that goes: StupidEmail posted:Hey! Thanks for the interest in my resume and my skills background. I looked at the profile* and it looks like I'd be a perfect match. Before we go too far I'd like to let you know that I have some expectations with this role being offered: So far only one has bitten but then they just ignored what I asked for and made a seriously low-ball offer that I turned down out of principle. * I haven't even looked at that stupid link you sent me. ** Not even close but you ask for a lot and see what you can get
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Dec 28, 2014 09:13
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Optimus_Rhyme posted:are commensurate with my current role should I seek upward advancement**. if you don't wanna sound like you're from nonameria then don't say commensurate - "in line" is better, and nix "upward" here and don't use exclamation points in business correspondence ever end with something like "thank you for your consideration i may be contacted at" blah blah blah instead of "i hope that you grant me, a foreigner, a minute of your valuable valuable time"
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Dec 28, 2014 09:43
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Optimus_Rhyme posted:so I get recruiters hitting me up all the time I've been telling VC-affiliated recruiters that I haven't read their pitch and I'm only even remotely interested in talking about C-level positions after a couple "hey, you already emailed me, remember I said C-level only?" I've started getting "hey, we have some portfolio companies who could use a CxO" emails none of my profiles at linkedin or wherever have details about what I've actually worked on the past several years
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Dec 28, 2014 09:55
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H.P. Hovercraft posted:if you don't wanna sound like you're from nonameria then don't say commensurate - "in line" is better, and nix "upward" here actually, when dealing with recruiters, write your business correspondence like your yosposting and make sure your condescension is "did you not read the part where I said 200k minimum? I think it's 350 now. still want to talk? have your director send me their number and maybe we will." make them present you their belly
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Dec 28, 2014 10:02
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eschaton posted:make them present you their belly i keep saiyan that urinating a lil on the conference room table is an excellent sign of dominance acceptance
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Dec 28, 2014 10:33
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Jonny 290 posted:its just beer and wine. everybody has 1-2 a day. tbqh its a very drinky place but ive not seen anything get out of hand ever i know someone in the handy customer service office. they have free beer/cider/liquor at all times and it does get out of hand. the story is someone got hammered and hosed their boss on the office couch. yes, this is a professional working environment and totally not a frat house run by idiot business majors
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Dec 28, 2014 12:39
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also, the way they pay their NOT-EMPLOYEES or 'professionals' sounds so fuckin illegal. if a professional doesn't show up to a job, handy charges them $35. sorry, they "withhold" $35 from the professional's pay unless the professional shows them a doctors note. starting pay for a contractor is 17/hr BUT YOU CAN SET YOUR OWN HOURS!! ONE CONTRACTOR MADE 80,000 LAST YEAR (minus all that self-employment tax, travel costs, etc)
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Dec 28, 2014 12:47
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Illusive gently caress Man posted:also, the way they pay their NOT-EMPLOYEES or 'professionals' sounds so fuckin illegal. if a professional doesn't show up to a job, handy charges them $35. sorry, they "withhold" $35 from the professional's pay unless the professional shows them a doctors note. of course it is. and it isn't anything new but is normally such small time offenses that attorney generals don't bother with it unless the place that is forcing staff to pay breakages or shortages in the drawers happens to be competing with a major campaign donor's chain. also most places are loving stupid enough to make it written policy. it will take an ag that is willing to call bullshit on the word smithing and isn't afraid of the sv companies calling them mean names help us New York, you're our only hope.
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Dec 28, 2014 14:51
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Optimus_Rhyme posted:I have I've been getting around 2-3 direct emails a week from people who either say they found the email on github or on LinkedIn. I think they've gotten a bit worse in December, maybe a lot of people start looking then idk They usually sound like they're on-staff at the place they're hiring, and lately they've often sent 1-2 followup emails afterwards sounding a lil desperate. I've just been ignoring them entirely so far but maybe a template "thanks maybe later I'll contact u" response is in order because it's mega flattering at least and it feels like having the contacts could be useful at some point
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Dec 28, 2014 15:52
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Shifty Pony posted:of course it is. and it isn't anything new but is normally such small time offenses that attorney generals don't bother with it unless the place that is forcing staff to pay breakages or shortages in the drawers happens to be competing with a major campaign donor's chain. also most places are loving stupid enough to make it written policy. Attorneys general
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Dec 28, 2014 15:57
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H.P. Hovercraft posted:his followup is called the one percent and is basically the same thing but with better interviews i watched this and it was ok
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Dec 28, 2014 16:12
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Bloody posted:Attorneys general Thank you.
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Dec 28, 2014 16:37
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Progressive JPEG posted:I've been getting around 2-3 direct emails a week from people who either say they found the email on github or on LinkedIn. I think they've gotten a bit worse in December, maybe a lot of people start looking then idk I got some from github where someone was impressed with my work (even though they didn't really understand what it was) and my involvement with the open source community my github is a bunch of college projects that havent been touched since and ive never committed to a repo other than my own. recruiters amirite
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Dec 28, 2014 18:41
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H.P. Hovercraft posted:and don't use exclamation points
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Dec 28, 2014 19:47
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to be fair, writing something that compiles puts you ahead of a lot of candidates
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Dec 28, 2014 20:26
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hobbesmaster posted:to be fair, writing something that compiles puts you ahead of a lot of candidates yeah but being a sexhaver puts you ahead of all candidates so
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Dec 28, 2014 20:48
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always use exclamation points in all correspondence, so they know you're serious and enthusiastic.
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Dec 28, 2014 20:50
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Citizen Tayne posted:always use exclamation points in all correspondence, so they know you're serious and enthusiastic. this!!
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Dec 28, 2014 21:23
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carry on then posted:yeah but being a sexhaver puts you ahead of all candidates so perhaps you should check out my sex-that-did-happen.md on my portfolio repo 
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Dec 28, 2014 21:26
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IPvSH6T posted:I got some from github where someone was impressed with my work (even though they didn't really understand what it was) and my involvement with the open source community i mean a query for "publicly committed code in <client's language>" is probably a way more useful signal than whatever linkedin will poo poo out
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Dec 28, 2014 23:50
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mostly because this:hobbesmaster posted:to be fair, writing something that compiles puts you ahead of a lot of candidates
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Dec 28, 2014 23:51
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mke your linkedin photo Goku
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Dec 29, 2014 00:04
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make sure you make a super gimmicky resume, it will ensure you are hired 100% <html> <name>Wild EEPROM</head> <title>java rockstar black belt 3rd dan</title> <li> <*>(420)219-6969 <*>wildeeprom@gmail.com </li> <body> <p>hello sir or madman i am looking for job in funy computer beep boop </body> </html>
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Dec 29, 2014 00:53
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Wild EEPROM posted:make sure you make a super gimmicky resume, it will ensure you are hired 100% this, only refer to yourself as a pony
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Dec 29, 2014 01:07
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im the </p>
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Dec 29, 2014 01:15
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VLADIMIR GLUTEN posted:lol ive never heard of this 'school' in my life and id bet its a thinktank
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Dec 29, 2014 01:35
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Mr. Apollo posted:what school, Ivey? they've been around forever be they like to present themselves as "the" Canadian business school. lots of alumni like to think of it as the Canadian Wharton or Harvard business school. ahahaha the canadian inferiority complex is amazing
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Dec 29, 2014 02:07
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fleshweasel posted:im the </piss>
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Dec 29, 2014 02:08
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H.P. Hovercraft posted:there's this moment in born rich where ivana trump relates a vignette about how during one of the times he was bankrupt, her dad pointed a homeless man out to her as they were leaving the tower named after him and remarked how that man was richer than he was the difference between a bankrupt trump and a homeless man is liquidity having $0 in total assets doesn't matter much if you have $20 million in liquid cash
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Dec 29, 2014 02:17
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Citizen Tayne posted:ahahaha the pittsburgh inferiority complex is amazing
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Dec 29, 2014 02:18
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god bless the steelers for being just an amazing team over the years, but my favorite historical fact is that the only reason they dont suck is because they took 3 million from the league to cross over into the AFC. before that they had (and still have problem) the record for worst season ever.
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Dec 29, 2014 02:50
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