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Arcsquad12 posted:"An elegant weapon for a more civilized time, eh? Well guess what, times have changed." A drat fine game.
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Jan 15, 2015 05:19
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Continued the EU is awful trip report. At around the 2 hr 15 minute mark in Maul: Lockdown, Darth Maul has killed a wampa by plunging his fist into its chest and crushing it's heart with his hands. In graphic detail, after trying the same thing with the wampa's brain. Also there is a mute autistic genius computer programmer. Edit: Oh holy poo poo, at about 2 hrs 45 min in the book went full retard and just ripped off Kaiser Soyze wholesale from Usual Suspects. "The man you are looking for, Iram Radique does not exist, he's a myth, told to young thugs that get too big for their britches" Cyberball 2072 fucked around with this message at 09:51 on Jan 15, 2015 |
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Jan 15, 2015 06:42
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Cyberball 2072 posted:Ki Adi Mundi (conehead Jedi from the prequels, also my fav) comes from a planet where women outnumber men 50 to 1 so in his downtime he chills with his 20 wives and 60 kids. wait what, why does he get to marry and still be a jedi
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Jan 15, 2015 09:11
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necessity i'd imagine. 50 wives is probably modest for space gerudo
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Jan 15, 2015 09:33
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01011001 posted:wait what, why does he get to marry and still be a jedi Wookiepedia posted:Cerean males aged more quickly than the females, who had similar lifespans to Humans. Thus, there were fewer males than females. Polygamous marriage was a necessity in order for the species to survive. Each male usually had one primary "bond-wife," and between four and ten "honor-wives." Ki Adi getting owned by his wife.  Ki Adi riding some weird birds with his kids. 
Cyberball 2072 fucked around with this message at 10:08 on Jan 15, 2015 |
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Jan 15, 2015 09:45
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that is insanely dumb
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Jan 15, 2015 09:51
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"Hey, you know our totally retarded rules and regulations? They totally apply! Except when they don't!" I hope in the new films Luke spent the past few years studying Jedi Holocrons and comes to the conclusion that the Jedi order that Obi-Wan so exalted was an incompetent, arrogant and hypocritical organization that deserved to die out just like the old republic did. Sure he will still train Jedi, but he realizes that the narrow-minded views of the dark and light sides of the old order led to their own pathetic destruction.
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Jan 15, 2015 09:57
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conehead harems are for sure not just eu authors once again assailing unwary child readers with their kinks, right?
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Jan 15, 2015 10:13
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I finished reading that slywalker paradigm poo poo and it is the worst. how autistic do you have to be to think that eye contact = hypnotism and not how loving normal people talk
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Jan 15, 2015 10:32
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So out of curiosity I read the new Marvel Star Wars #1 and it actually wasn't terrible, so I guess they're doing it wrong Disney, what are you doing hiring actual writers and not any retarded nerd you find on the street
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Jan 15, 2015 14:44
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Gammatron 64 posted:So out of curiosity I read the new Marvel Star Wars #1 and it actually wasn't terrible, so I guess they're doing it wrong someone literally says "these aren't the slaves you're looking for" at one point "actual writers"
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Jan 15, 2015 14:53
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ALL-PRO SEXMAN posted:That scene was awesome because you could just sense how much Ian McDiarmid was enjoying himself. He seems to be the only one in the series that gets how bad this poo poo is and said, "gently caress it, time to camp this bitch up"
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Jan 15, 2015 14:53
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ElGroucho posted:He seems to be the only one in the series that gets how bad this poo poo is and said, "gently caress it, time to camp this bitch up" actually ian mcdiarmid's an idiot. he read the lovely "darth plagueis" EU book and said he loved it and claims hayden christensen's performance is "underrated"
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Jan 15, 2015 14:55
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Cnut the Great posted:actually ian mcdiarmid's an idiot. he read the lovely "darth plagueis" EU book and said he loved it and claims hayden christensen's performance is "underrated" SuperMechagodzilla 724 computer parts 433 Bongo Bill 378 kiimo 341 euphronius 324 Cnut the Great 268
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Jan 15, 2015 15:28
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Milky Moor posted:SuperMechagodzilla 724 when I was stupid enough to actually read the terrible star wars thread in CD, cnut the great was one of the dumber posters in it
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Jan 15, 2015 15:36
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Cnut the Great posted:actually ian mcdiarmid's an idiot. he read the lovely "darth plagueis" EU book and said he loved it and claims hayden christensen's performance is "underrated" In fairness very few actors openly poo poo talk the people and projects they work with when asked about them, even when they are manifestly poo poo.
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Jan 15, 2015 15:50
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Cnut the Great posted:actually ian mcdiarmid's an idiot. he read the lovely "darth plagueis" EU book and said he loved it and claims hayden christensen's performance is "underrated" WRONG! Darth Plagueis is a great EU book. Too bad it's no longer cannon. Poor Darth P. So wise, and so naive.
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Jan 15, 2015 16:04
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Gammatron 64 posted:when I was stupid enough to actually read the terrible star wars thread in CD, cnut the great was one of the dumber posters in it sorry you were dumb enough to think any of the ridiculously retarded posts i make in that thread are real here's a hint: neiter are SMG's. teh prequels are awful garbage but it's funny because nerds on the internet are too stupid to properly explain why
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Jan 15, 2015 16:06
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Cnut the Great posted:sorry you were dumb enough to think any of the ridiculously retarded posts i make in that thread are real I think the whole joke of the SMG thing is that he's using it to prove just how dumb marxist film criticism is or like how retarded english majors are or something and how it's all complete bullshit which is kinda funny at first but I eventually get bored of reading people trying to argue with SMG which is why I don't read CD
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Jan 15, 2015 16:29
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ALL-PRO SEXMAN posted:See also the fifty-six different sets of Death Star plans stolen by two hundred and seven different groups at thirty-nine different places and times. Kyle Katarn did it, I refuse to accept anyone saying otherwise. Kazy posted:I finished reading that slywalker paradigm poo poo and it is the worst. how autistic do you have to be to think that eye contact = hypnotism and not how loving normal people talk But is he talking about normal eye contact or Oblivion characters' glassy eyed death stares? Woolie Wool fucked around with this message at 16:36 on Jan 15, 2015 |
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Jan 15, 2015 16:30
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Is there a sentient "FORCE-SENSITIVE" planet in the EU that becomes a Jedi?
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Jan 15, 2015 16:31
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Cnut the Great posted:sorry you were dumb enough to think any of the ridiculously retarded posts i make in that thread are real JOKES ON YOU WE'RE JUST PRETENDING TO BE RETARDED!!! 
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Jan 15, 2015 17:02
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If there are no blowjobs in the films and the eu is no longer canon, that means that blowjobs are not canon in the Star Wars universe.
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Jan 15, 2015 17:16
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Cnut the Great posted:sorry you were dumb enough to think any of the ridiculously retarded posts i make in that thread are real The puppetmaster defense is just kinda sad
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Jan 15, 2015 17:27
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Woolie Wool posted:Kyle Katarn did it, I refuse to accept anyone saying otherwise. Kyle Katarn is still canon gently caress ya'll
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Jan 15, 2015 17:29
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OneThousandMonkeys posted:Samuel asked George for a purple lightsaber. The EU transformed this into "Mace Windu uses a purple lightsaber because he is conflicted, and by the way this inner conflict makes him the greatest Jedi lightsaber master." Please tell me Jackson actually had them carve BMF on his sabre. Tell me this is a thing that really happened.
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Jan 15, 2015 17:33
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Yolomon Wayne posted:Please tell me Jackson actually had them carve BMF on his sabre. That seems like something a prop guy would happily do for Samuel Jackson.
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Jan 15, 2015 17:40
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Trast posted:That seems like something a prop guy would happily do for Samuel Jackson. tbh if I were a props guy and they told me "this lightsaber is for Sam Jackson" I'd probably etch BAMF into the hilt without being asked to
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Jan 15, 2015 17:58
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Cyberball 2072 posted:Huh, I thought the "many bothans died..." was from 4, it's been a long time since I've watched em. The "many bothans" were escaping on a shuttle after the Death Star 2 plans were successfully transmitted, but a proton torpedo was fired at them. Dash Rendar tried to shoot the torpedo from his really cool ship but failed and the torpedo blew up the Bothans and Dash was really sad about it. After he died they found out the torpedo was a special armor-plated one and so he didn't screw up, there was no way he could've stopped it. But the N64 Shadows of the Empire secret ending reveals that Dash didn't die, he just faked his death. No idea if he ever found out about the torpedo.
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Jan 15, 2015 18:41
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Shadeoses posted:Probably meditate, ponder the Force, tinker with their lightsabre, balance their chaotic emotions, think hard about celibacy, etc. Space-Savonarolas. How exciting. It is such an asset to the lore and the ongoing wealth of fiction within our culture, that someone would sit down and write out all that tedium.
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Jan 15, 2015 20:45
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Tender Bender posted:The "many bothans" were escaping on a shuttle after the Death Star 2 plans were successfully transmitted, but a proton torpedo was fired at them. Dash Rendar tried to shoot the torpedo from his really cool ship but failed and the torpedo blew up the Bothans and Dash was really sad about it. After he died they found out the torpedo was a special armor-plated one and so he didn't screw up, there was no way he could've stopped it. But the N64 Shadows of the Empire secret ending reveals that Dash didn't die, he just faked his death. No idea if he ever found out about the torpedo. Ahahaha holy poo poo, I totally forgot about Dash Rendar. How many Han Solo derived characters are there in the EU? Talon Karde , Dash Rendar and Atton Rand for sure, but I'm guessing there's at least another half-dozen vest-wearing corellian smugglers out there. "Han Solo? Never heard of him. This here original character is just a hard living corellian smuggler who flies a modified freighter. See, he says he only cares about money, but actually he has a heart of gold and eventually comes through for the good guys in a big way. That's the hook that makes him unique!" 
Smerdyakov fucked around with this message at 21:32 on Jan 15, 2015 |
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Jan 15, 2015 21:29
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Call me crazy but isn't the information that renowned rebel spy Manny Bothans retrieved only in regards to the Emperor being aboard the DS2? Like did they even have any plans for it? Lando just told that ball-chin dude to lock on to the largest power source, it's got to be the reactor, yeah? Remember, none of your EU bullshit is canon. Reference only the relevant scenes in the 1983 motion picture Return of the Jedi in your answer please. edit: poo poo, I sort of enjoyed the new Star Wars comic. It had a laser whip, hamfisted references to the movies on every page, artoo sprayed a bunch of green poo poo on the floor and it's blatantly going to be about Vader finding out who Luke is but I still sort of enjoyed it. I guess what I'm trying to say is that now, from my point of view this thread is evil. freethought fucked around with this message at 00:25 on Jan 16, 2015 |
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Jan 16, 2015 00:04
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freethought posted:Call me crazy but isn't the information that renowned rebel spy Manny Bothans retrieved only in regards to the Emperor being aboard the DS2? Like did they even have any plans for it? Lando just told that ball-chin dude to lock on to the largest power source, it's got to be the reactor, yeah? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9_Q5O79FmMs bothans found out where poo poo was and that it wasnt guarded also i guess the emperor would hermit it up on his ship that is also the absolute worst video i have ever seen recorded
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Jan 16, 2015 00:28
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the emperor planted the information so he could trap the rebel fleet and destroy them, he states that in the movie. the bothans died for nothing sheev did nothing wrong
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Jan 16, 2015 00:41
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It's obviously a misread line, intended to refer to the waves and waves of droid replicas of General Solo dispatched throughout the galaxy to locate the Emperor. The script actually read "Many Bot-Hans died to bring us this information".
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Jan 16, 2015 00:45
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SaltLick posted:bothans found out where poo poo was and that it wasnt guarded also i guess the emperor would hermit it up on his ship. But definitely no mention of plans. At least that only leaves one set of Death Star plans to get passed around like VD in a submarine in the all new and improved EU. She does explicitly refer to Bothan spies though, so it turns out Manny Bothans was never canon. At least he was there to make Mara Jade and the Solo kids feel at home wherever it is the de-canonised go. Hell one would presume. Or at the very least a lower tier of Paradise.
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Jan 16, 2015 00:59
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No, it's many bot-hands dyed, you idiots. Robotic hands that were dyed so they could blend into their environments retrieved the data, and none in fact died and they were celebrated as heroes after the rebellion. There's a symbolic statue of a single giant rainbow robotic fist on Kashyyyk in their honour. "Many Bot-hands dyed retrieved this data", was meant to be the line, but Lucas liked the misread and kept it in.
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Jan 16, 2015 01:00
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Calico Heart posted:No, it's many bot-hands dyed, you idiots. Robotic hands that were dyed so they could blend into their environments retrieved the data, and none in fact died and they were celebrated as heroes after the rebellion. There's a symbolic statue of a single giant rainbow robotic fist on Kashyyyk in their honour. sorry but robots don't exist in Star Wars 
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Jan 16, 2015 01:04
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Bothans are only mentioned once in the OT, as spies, and so in the EU Bothans are renowned for their cunning and are all spies or scheming politicians.
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Jan 16, 2015 01:09
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Tender Bender posted:Bothans are only mentioned once in the OT, as spies, and so in the EU Bothans are renowned for their cunning and are all spies or scheming politicians. Also furries
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Jan 16, 2015 01:15
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