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Cool Bear
Sep 2, 2012

My Imaginary GF posted:

Hear me, grave fathers! noble tribunes, stay!
For pity of mine age, whose youth was spent
In dangerous wars, whilst you securely slept;
For all my blood in Rome's great quarrel shed;
For all the frosty nights that I have watch'd; 1130
And for these bitter tears, which now you see
Filling the aged wrinkles in my cheeks;
Be pitiful to my condemned sons,
Whose souls are not corrupted as 'tis thought.
For two and twenty sons I never wept, 1135
Because they died in honour's lofty bed.
[Lieth down; the Judges, &c., pass by him, and Exeunt]
For these, these, tribunes, in the dust I write
My heart's deep languor and my soul's sad tears:
Let my tears stanch the earth's dry appetite; 1140
My sons' sweet blood will make it shame and blush.
O earth, I will befriend thee more with rain,
That shall distil from these two ancient urns,
Than youthful April shall with all his showers:
In summer's drought I'll drop upon thee still; 1145
In winter with warm tears I'll melt the snow
And keep eternal spring-time on thy face,
So thou refuse to drink my dear sons' blood.
[Enter LUCIUS, with his sword drawn]
O reverend tribunes! O gentle, aged men! 1150
Unbind my sons, reverse the doom of death;
And let me say, that never wept before,
My tears are now prevailing orators.

This is bullshit, and I won't read it at all because I extremely doubt that any intention was put behind it. This was pasted here in order to deliberately waste everyones time

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Islam is the Lite Rock FM
Jul 27, 2007

by exmarx

That's a world I refuse to create if I ever become president.

Raskolnikov38
Mar 3, 2007

We were somewhere around Manila when the drugs began to take hold

Jerry Manderbilt posted:

we read it senior year here, and basically all i remember is that holden caulfield was a spoiled manchild

this is the correct reading

Majorian
Jul 1, 2009

Sharkie posted:

I would opt in to the Brave New World system without hesitation. I mean it's not ideal but if you have do live in a dystopia it's the best one.

I probably agree with that, but it's still a pretty bad place overall.

quote:

I loved Rome. Every glorious second of it.

It did SO many things right. Why did they have to make Cicero such a puss? And why the gently caress did they recast Octavian? I don't care that Max Pirkis didn't look old enough!:argh:

paranoid randroid
Mar 4, 2007
MIGF should cut a promo on cool bear and be like, this saturday i hope youre ready to get chicag-owned

Mecca-Benghazi
Mar 31, 2012


Jerry Manderbilt posted:

my major's already writing-intensive to begin with
take proofs then!!!

Nintendo Kid
Aug 4, 2011

by Smythe

Cool Bear posted:

Shakespeare was an extremely great writer and if this were the year 1400 then I would be all on his bandwagon. He was in no way pretentious.

The people who are pretentious are those who believe that every school child should spend ANY amount of time deciphering this obscure language and thinking that his words apply in any way more effectively than thousands of other writers in the HUNDREDS of years of history that have elapsed since his last work.

they're a lot better when they're actually performed almost all plays are boring poo poo when just fuckin read.

itd be like having to read movie scripts

Raskolnikov38 posted:

this is the correct reading

it's the message of the book

icantfindaname
Jul 1, 2008


Cool Bear posted:

pretentious

You keep using that word. I don't think it means what you think it means

Peztopiary
Mar 16, 2009

by exmarx
If schools are going to teach The Giver that poo poo should be done in sixth grade max. Senior year ought to be nothing but Norse legends. If you can't hold a conversation about Norse myth lasting at least ten minutes you ain't poo poo.

StandardVC10
Feb 6, 2007

This avatar now 50% more dark mode compliant
All I remember about Catcher in the Rye is Holden missing every chance he had to be a sympathetic character, which I guess is kind of the point.

Majorian
Jul 1, 2009

Jerry Manderbilt posted:

we read it senior year here, and basically all i remember is that holden caulfield was a spoiled manchild

Anybody who tells you there is more to this shitass book is a dirty liar.

...or...dare I say it...PHONY?!

The Warszawa
Jun 6, 2005

Look at me. Look at me.

I am the captain now.

Majorian posted:

I probably agree with that, but it's still a pretty bad place overall.


It did SO many things right. Why did they have to make Cicero such a puss? And why the gently caress did they recast Octavian? I don't care that Max Pirkis didn't look old enough!:argh:

such a bitchin' theme song too

Jerry Manderbilt
May 31, 2012

No matter how much paperwork I process, it never goes away. It only increases.

Mecca-Benghazi posted:

take proofs then!!!

proofs? as in mathematical proofs?

all the math classes here are major-restricted to STEM :(

paranoid randroid
Mar 4, 2007
the washington consensus is that im going to knock your rear end out

Islam is the Lite Rock FM
Jul 27, 2007

by exmarx

Peztopiary posted:

If schools are going to teach The Giver that poo poo should be done in sixth grade max. Senior year ought to be nothing but Norse legends. If you can't hold a conversation about Norse myth lasting at least ten minutes you ain't poo poo.

Beowulf was the poo poo and if we're gonna have an apocalypse I wanna have Ragnarok.

Majorian
Jul 1, 2009

The Warszawa posted:

such a bitchin' theme song too

I know, right? The whole title sequence is excellent. It exemplifies what the show did best, really, ie: show how incredibly colorful, lively, and CRAZY Rome was back in those days. HBO is good with theme songs.

Peztopiary
Mar 16, 2009

by exmarx
It totally was. That loving dragon, that death. Also Grendel by John Gardner is a good companion book.

mandatory lesbian
Dec 18, 2012

paranoid randroid posted:

i read heart of darkness in hs and loved it. eat my shorts, english class haters.

my high school english teacher said here watch this, handed me her copy of Apocalypse Now and told me to write a report comparing it to heart of darkness

Cool Bear
Sep 2, 2012

icantfindaname posted:

You keep using that word. I don't think it means what you think it means

"Oh this is like what Shakespeare wrote in his great work, King Lear IV

For thou art not as good as ye mightst pretend
Yet other times, not so good
Whenst classical knowledge bestowdst upon
the pauper of little book ownage

Majorian
Jul 1, 2009

DemeaninDemon posted:

Beowulf was the poo poo and if we're gonna have an apocalypse I wanna have Ragnarok.

Anybody here play "Banner Saga," by the way? Jebus that's a good loving game.

Joementum
May 23, 2004

jesus christ
I read Catcher in the Rye, Death of a Salesman, and As I Lay Dying in the same class.

I don't think that teacher liked us very much :stare:

icantfindaname
Jul 1, 2008


The speech in Henry V is like the prototypical inspiration speech. Shakespeare works aren't magically The Best Ever or anything, it's just that he wrote a shitload of stuff and a very large amount of it is very high quality which makes it easy to teach as a block

icantfindaname
Jul 1, 2008


Cool Bear posted:

"Oh this is like what Shakespeare wrote in his great work, King Lear IV

For thou art not as good as ye mightst pretend
Yet other times, not so good
Whenst classical knowledge bestowdst upon
the pauper of little book ownage

The people talking to you aren't pretending to be smarter than you, they actually are

Jerry Manderbilt
May 31, 2012

No matter how much paperwork I process, it never goes away. It only increases.
i know this white guy from denton who told me he read ender's game sophomore year for class

Islam is the Lite Rock FM
Jul 27, 2007

by exmarx
I dug the poo poo out of Macbeth too.

Cool Bear
Sep 2, 2012

Cool Bear posted:

"Oh this is like what Shakespeare wrote in his great work, King Lear IV

For thou art not as good as ye mightst pretend
Yet other times, not so good
Whenst classical knowledge bestowdst upon
the pauper of little book ownage

Yall read this and be like 'is that even a complete sentence!?

paranoid randroid
Mar 4, 2007

forbidden lesbian posted:

my high school english teacher said here watch this, handed me her copy of Apocalypse Now and told me to write a report comparing it to heart of darkness

yeah we watched apocalypse now too

the paper topic for that month was "what does the boat represent"

Dreylad
Jun 19, 2001

Joementum posted:

i can't because i never watched their dumb show

though, let me guess, something about markets and freedom and *ffffaaaarrrrrrtttttsssss*

they trotted out a successful disabled person and said "well this guy manages without ADA why do we impose these restrictions on productive citizens!?!"

it was ridiculous

mandatory lesbian
Dec 18, 2012
man i loved that teacher, she was the one who got us to read Julius Ceasar too

Peztopiary
Mar 16, 2009

by exmarx

Jerry Manderbilt posted:

i know this white guy from denton who told me he read ender's game sophomore year for class

As a book to do a report on, or as a book the whole class read? Because one of those is way less horrifying.

Majorian
Jul 1, 2009

icantfindaname posted:

The speech in Henry V is like the prototypical inspiration speech.

No one beats Branagh for the St. Crispin's Day Speech.

There, I said it.

icantfindaname
Jul 1, 2008


Jerry Manderbilt posted:

i know this white guy from denton who told me he read ender's game sophomore year for class

Ender's Game is literally a nerd going "but I really am smarter and better than everyone else why won't they recognize it????????? :qq:"

I liked the spinoff series with the side character from Ender's Game just for the techno-thriller aspect of it. The spinoff series that went deep into Catholic theology not so much

Jerry Manderbilt
May 31, 2012

No matter how much paperwork I process, it never goes away. It only increases.

Peztopiary posted:

As a book to do a report on, or as a book the whole class read? Because one of those is way less horrifying.

from the way he worded it, the latter. "yeah we read that book for class, it was p fun"

My Imaginary GF
Jul 17, 2005

by R. Guyovich

Cool Bear posted:

This is bullshit, and I won't read it at all because I extremely doubt that any intention was put behind it. This was pasted here in order to deliberately waste everyones time

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=OEUkn6tQ3us

coolbear, you have allowed your emotions to interfere with your articulation


now watch patrick stewart

paranoid randroid
Mar 4, 2007

Peztopiary posted:

As a book to do a report on, or as a book the whole class read? Because one of those is way less horrifying.

is the more horrifying option the one where enders game is assigned reading? because i went to a middle school where it was assigned reading. mostly because orson scott card was from the state, but still.

Majorian
Jul 1, 2009

paranoid randroid posted:

yeah we watched apocalypse now too

the paper topic for that month was "what does the boat represent"

Lucky. I've always liked the Odyssey allusions in that too. That's a thread that people don't pick up as much as the Heart of Darkness homage, but it's there too.

Sharkie
Feb 4, 2013

by Fluffdaddy

Majorian posted:

I probably agree with that, but it's still a pretty bad place overall.


It did SO many things right. Why did they have to make Cicero such a puss? And why the gently caress did they recast Octavian? I don't care that Max Pirkis didn't look old enough!:argh:

I liked the actor who played Cicero, but yeah that wasn't a flattering portrait. New Octavian (and his rat-faced little wife) were so creepy and off-seeming. Brian Blessed did a much different but more believable Octavian in I Claudius.

James Purefoy can do no wrong, though. That scene where he hears what happened to Cleopatra :smith:. And I'd pay for a series that was just Atia talking poo poo about people.

mandatory lesbian
Dec 18, 2012

paranoid randroid posted:

yeah we watched apocalypse now too

the paper topic for that month was "what does the boat represent"

haha how did your school get away with showing an r-rated movie to a bunch of 15 and 16 year olds

Cool Bear
Sep 2, 2012

icantfindaname posted:

The people talking to you aren't pretending to be smarter than you, they actually are

You have made a powerful enemy Mr uh rofl "icantfindaname" professor hyperintelligent lol

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paranoid randroid
Mar 4, 2007

forbidden lesbian posted:

haha how did your school get away with showing an r-rated movie to a bunch of 15 and 16 year olds

the magic of permission slips

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