Improbable Lobster posted:

Chris Knight posted:

watching my tv
man comes on to tell me
how thin my laptop could be
but he can't be a man cuz he don't drink
the same craft beer as me

ol qwerty bastard posted:

it's always funny when people assume they can go up to animals and just pet them. and then they ignore blatant body language like who the gently caress doesn't know that having its ears laid back is a sign of anger in pretty much every loving species

"domesticated" doesn't imply "friendly"

Kenny Logins posted:

Kenny Logins posted:

a horse with its ears pinned back being a humongous red flag is like day 1 farm wisdom

Kenny Logins posted:

a horse with its ears pinned back being a humongous red flag is like day 1 farm wisdom

wayfinder posted:

I can 100% believe that a large portion of people who grew up without animals do not know that kind of stuff. Same as you and I probably don't know a shitload of stuff about herbs and so on, or about vulture gestures, or salt mine etiquette, etc.

wayfinder posted:

I can 100% believe that a large portion of people who grew up without animals do not know that kind of stuff. Same as you and I probably don't know a shitload of stuff about herbs and so on, or about vulture gestures, or salt mine etiquette, etc.

wayfinder posted:

salt mine etiquette, etc.

Shaggar posted:

nah, that dude just thinks nothing he does is ever wrong so theres no way the horse would hurt him.

Kenny Logins posted:

fair enough though i'd also wager that if there was any sort of person to talk to on the premises that said day 1 farm wisdom would be the first thing they say

even in pre-hyper-litigious days but especially since

same as the salt mine foreman, if present, wouldn't let you in without telling you a thing or two

horses are very bitey and kicky and have been for thousands of years

big scary monsters posted:

wow look at this guy never been to a salt mine.

big scary monsters posted:

wow look at this guy never been to a salt mine. the most important thing is to clear the slide as quickly as possible so as not to hold up the people behind you

wayfinder posted:

excuse me?

I crossed national borders underground in a salt mine when you were merely a jar of yoghurt in the supermarket

wayfinder posted:

excuse me?

I crossed national borders underground in a salt mine when you were merely a jar of yoghurt in the supermarket

prefect posted:

somebody post that hilarious series of quotes about horses from the fyad guy. wulgus, maybe?

(the new forum search is good, but i guess it doesn't go back to the last time i asked for this stuff )

wesley snypes posted:

I had a friend in high school who kept horses. One of them took fright at its own shadow and broke two legs trying to get away. horses are easily frightened and frighteningly stupid

wayfinder posted:

here me basically

Kenny Logins posted:

pyf has its occasional uses

Ruddha posted:
I don't know about anyone else, but I know for a fact that horses are stupider than poo poo and WILL kill themselves if you don't take an absurd amount of precautions and adorn them in the right silly accessories so that they don't scare themselves and fall over dead, and even then at best you can reduce the chances that they will do that, but they're still absolutely going to. Women who are obsessed with horses are just as bad as ones who are obsessed with anything else, but it may be dumber because it's a placeholder for animalistic male sexuality; however, in reality, it doesn't hold up because dominant male sexual energy is incompatible with horse personality and tendencies because, again, they're absolutely going to kill themselves by accident, whereas studs and straight power tops are highly unlikely to catch their reflection in a mirror then break their leg and get eaten by a mountain lioness

Ruddha posted:
Of course, if you don't nail little metal rings onto them, they'll split open, and then they'll die.

Ruddha posted:
I personally guarantee you a dog will never in this life hear a bee then have a heart attack out of fear, dying

Ruddha posted:
Babies grow up and that's okay, it's like, sometimes a great meal is worth a lot of prep, for example. Horses only get more likely to die from a stupid reason as they get older. Oh poor ol' Freckles, thought of ants and died

Ruddha posted:
That's understandable, but in the scheme of things it's a fairly low chance. With horses, there is no such thing as a natural death at any point in existence: they've strictly only died from stupid poo poo. Saw water and passed away

Aleph Null posted:
My dad had a horse fall in a hole and almost die. They had to use a truck wench to get her out. She was too weak to walk so they tied ropes between two trees to hold her up. It took days of them hand feeding her before she could stand or walk on her own.

Less than a month later, she fell in the same hole and died.

Baronjutter posted:
As someone who grew up with a couple friends into horses and loving dressage I can say that if anything you are being way too easy going on them. Its like their survival strategy is to break their legs or kill them selves at the slightest sign of danger, or a noise, or a change in humidity.

My friends barn had to install a big fence because they were next to a turkey farm and despite the horses seeing these birds every single loving day, any time you'd ride past them most of the horses would briefly flip out and hurt them selves or throw their rider when the turkeys came into view. You could literally ride in a loop for an hour and every single time the horse would "scare" at the turkeys.

Maybe wilder horses are smarter but dressage horses are more fragile and stupid than a baby that just learned to crawl. They will jump onto fences and cut them selves in half, they will get stuck between buildings, they will randomly for no reason at all break their legs. If there is a way to kill or hurt them selves they will find it. And people drop 50k or more on these idiots.

Kenny Logins posted:

pyf has its occasional uses

Ruddha posted:
I don't know about anyone else, but I know for a fact that horses are stupider than poo poo and WILL kill themselves if you don't take an absurd amount of precautions and adorn them in the right silly accessories so that they don't scare themselves and fall over dead, and even then at best you can reduce the chances that they will do that, but they're still absolutely going to. Women who are obsessed with horses are just as bad as ones who are obsessed with anything else, but it may be dumber because it's a placeholder for animalistic male sexuality; however, in reality, it doesn't hold up because dominant male sexual energy is incompatible with horse personality and tendencies because, again, they're absolutely going to kill themselves by accident, whereas studs and straight power tops are highly unlikely to catch their reflection in a mirror then break their leg and get eaten by a mountain lioness

Ruddha posted:
Of course, if you don't nail little metal rings onto them, they'll split open, and then they'll die.

Ruddha posted:
I personally guarantee you a dog will never in this life hear a bee then have a heart attack out of fear, dying

Ruddha posted:
Babies grow up and that's okay, it's like, sometimes a great meal is worth a lot of prep, for example. Horses only get more likely to die from a stupid reason as they get older. Oh poor ol' Freckles, thought of ants and died

Ruddha posted:
That's understandable, but in the scheme of things it's a fairly low chance. With horses, there is no such thing as a natural death at any point in existence: they've strictly only died from stupid poo poo. Saw water and passed away

Aleph Null posted:
My dad had a horse fall in a hole and almost die. They had to use a truck wench to get her out. She was too weak to walk so they tied ropes between two trees to hold her up. It took days of them hand feeding her before she could stand or walk on her own.

Less than a month later, she fell in the same hole and died.

Baronjutter posted:
As someone who grew up with a couple friends into horses and loving dressage I can say that if anything you are being way too easy going on them. Its like their survival strategy is to break their legs or kill them selves at the slightest sign of danger, or a noise, or a change in humidity.

My friends barn had to install a big fence because they were next to a turkey farm and despite the horses seeing these birds every single loving day, any time you'd ride past them most of the horses would briefly flip out and hurt them selves or throw their rider when the turkeys came into view. You could literally ride in a loop for an hour and every single time the horse would "scare" at the turkeys.

Maybe wilder horses are smarter but dressage horses are more fragile and stupid than a baby that just learned to crawl. They will jump onto fences and cut them selves in half, they will get stuck between buildings, they will randomly for no reason at all break their legs. If there is a way to kill or hurt them selves they will find it. And people drop 50k or more on these idiots.

Valeyard posted:

I want a collie

Improbable Lobster posted:

working dogs are usually fine since they actually have to function outside of show rooms

pram posted:

are horses really that dumb lol

pram posted:

are horses really that dumb lol

Kenny Logins posted:

pyf has its occasional uses

Ruddha posted:
I don't know about anyone else, but I know for a fact that horses are stupider than poo poo and WILL kill themselves if you don't take an absurd amount of precautions and adorn them in the right silly accessories so that they don't scare themselves and fall over dead, and even then at best you can reduce the chances that they will do that, but they're still absolutely going to. Women who are obsessed with horses are just as bad as ones who are obsessed with anything else, but it may be dumber because it's a placeholder for animalistic male sexuality; however, in reality, it doesn't hold up because dominant male sexual energy is incompatible with horse personality and tendencies because, again, they're absolutely going to kill themselves by accident, whereas studs and straight power tops are highly unlikely to catch their reflection in a mirror then break their leg and get eaten by a mountain lioness

Ruddha posted:
Of course, if you don't nail little metal rings onto them, they'll split open, and then they'll die.

Ruddha posted:
I personally guarantee you a dog will never in this life hear a bee then have a heart attack out of fear, dying

Ruddha posted:
Babies grow up and that's okay, it's like, sometimes a great meal is worth a lot of prep, for example. Horses only get more likely to die from a stupid reason as they get older. Oh poor ol' Freckles, thought of ants and died

Ruddha posted:
That's understandable, but in the scheme of things it's a fairly low chance. With horses, there is no such thing as a natural death at any point in existence: they've strictly only died from stupid poo poo. Saw water and passed away

Aleph Null posted:
My dad had a horse fall in a hole and almost die. They had to use a truck wench to get her out. She was too weak to walk so they tied ropes between two trees to hold her up. It took days of them hand feeding her before she could stand or walk on her own.

Less than a month later, she fell in the same hole and died.

Baronjutter posted:
As someone who grew up with a couple friends into horses and loving dressage I can say that if anything you are being way too easy going on them. Its like their survival strategy is to break their legs or kill them selves at the slightest sign of danger, or a noise, or a change in humidity.

My friends barn had to install a big fence because they were next to a turkey farm and despite the horses seeing these birds every single loving day, any time you'd ride past them most of the horses would briefly flip out and hurt them selves or throw their rider when the turkeys came into view. You could literally ride in a loop for an hour and every single time the horse would "scare" at the turkeys.

Maybe wilder horses are smarter but dressage horses are more fragile and stupid than a baby that just learned to crawl. They will jump onto fences and cut them selves in half, they will get stuck between buildings, they will randomly for no reason at all break their legs. If there is a way to kill or hurt them selves they will find it. And people drop 50k or more on these idiots.

wesley snypes posted:

it's the same with deer, their main strategy is as follows: if there is a noise, do a 180 and run as fast as you can until you can't run any more

Liver Disaster posted:

i remember when everyone was like 'oh deer are cute!' then i moved to the mountains and found that image is entirely false they are actually tall rats but less domesticated (than wild rats)

prefect posted:

rats are pretty smart

ol qwerty bastard posted:

my horse