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Furnaceface
Oct 21, 2004




Kilza posted:

Hopefully this goes better than it did for Theo McFlurry in last year's BAP. :ohdear:

A bit late but man, so do I.

:smith::hf::smith:

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Rutkowski
Apr 28, 2008

CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS GUY?

Hockles posted:

With the 41st Overall Pick, the Arizona Coyotes select....

From the Kootenay Ice... Hugo Chavez.

oh man he is gonna have issues with Sheriff Joe.

Hockles
Dec 25, 2007

Resident of Camp Blood
Crystal Lake

With the 60th Overall Pick, the Winnipeg Jets select....

From the Regina Pats... Sergei Saskatanov.

Hockles
Dec 25, 2007

Resident of Camp Blood
Crystal Lake

Round 2 recap:

a false
Mar 5, 2009

I DECIDE
WHO LIVES
AND WHO DIES

Hockles posted:

With the 60th Overall Pick, the Winnipeg Jets select....

From the Regina Pats... Sergei Saskatanov.

it's beautiful

Hockles posted:

With the 37th Overall Pick, the Tampa Bay Lightning select....

From the Kingston Frontenacs... Buju Banton.

buju is happy with this result but was really hoping for something in california

Anders
Nov 8, 2004

I'd rather score...

... but I'll grind it good for you
Are everyone with fake twitters on the twitter list? Recently added Ewic Windros, Potatoes O'Bourke and Kilza

a false
Mar 5, 2009

I DECIDE
WHO LIVES
AND WHO DIES
the news just gets better and better for buju

Hockles
Dec 25, 2007

Resident of Camp Blood
Crystal Lake

Yep. That looks like a legit award. World renowned Twitter account @90rbzj24bp89 You should give them all you personal information and SSN

a false
Mar 5, 2009

I DECIDE
WHO LIVES
AND WHO DIES
previous winner Jack Johnson told me this is all legit

Dubious
Mar 7, 2006

The Heroes the Vikings Deserve
Lipstick Apathy
loving vancouver again?

:suicide:

Top Hats Monthly
Jun 22, 2011


People are people so why should it be, that you and I should get along so awfully blink blink recall STOP IT YOU POSH LITTLE SHIT
CBJ OWNS

Sharks Eat Bear
Dec 25, 2004

clint clemens drafted by the historic franchise les habitants. great place for a young starlet to get plenty of chances and ice time, right boys?

Stiev Awt
Mar 20, 2007


Mr. Stats and Satonaka-san are just gonna have to the Sens on their back.

JawKnee
Mar 24, 2007





You'll take the ride to leave this town along that yellow line
Prodigious Wang, all alone on the Blues, no other goons in sight

Kilza
Oct 4, 2013

JawKnee posted:

Prodigious Wang Andrew Kilza, all alone on the Blues Sharks, no other goons in sight

:(

Bregor
May 31, 2013

People are idiots, Leslie.
McPhallus, Rutkowski, and Yokozuna on the Oil. Dynasty time :getin:

Anders
Nov 8, 2004

I'd rather score...

... but I'll grind it good for you

Sharks Eat Bear posted:

clint clemens drafted by the historic franchise les habitants. great place for a young starlet to get plenty of chances and ice time, right boys?

Anders Robertson is gonna get so fat eating all the poutine the city has to offer #pardonmyfrench

Hand Knit
Oct 24, 2005

Beer Loses more than a game Sunday ...
We lost our Captain, our Teammate, our Friend Kelly Calabro...
Rest in Peace my friend you will be greatly missed..
Canada

GuavaMoment
Aug 13, 2006

YouTube dude

Dubious posted:

loving vancouver again?

:suicide:

Enjoy your decade of getting first round swept. ;)

Furnaceface
Oct 21, 2004





Been there before SJ buddy.

:(:respek::(

JawKnee
Mar 24, 2007





You'll take the ride to leave this town along that yellow line

honestly being stuck behind... you? and one other center on Florida last year was the pits, so I'm excited!

fits
Jan 1, 2008

Love Always,
The Captain

JawKnee posted:

honestly being stuck behind... you? and one other center on Florida last year was the pits, so I'm excited!

Wasn't Florida the team last year that had two goon 99OV centres, then their third and fourth line centres combined rating was lower than 99?

JawKnee
Mar 24, 2007





You'll take the ride to leave this town along that yellow line

fits posted:

Wasn't Florida the team last year that had two goon 99OV centres, then their third and fourth line centres combined rating was lower than 99?

Humungous got traded to Pittsburgh at some point, don't remember when or what his standings were (think he peaked at like a 90 or 91)

Teemu Pokemon
Jun 19, 2004

To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause
I really wanted Crushinator and Buju to end up on the same team :(

Kilza
Oct 4, 2013

JawKnee posted:

honestly being stuck behind... you? and one other center on Florida last year was the pits, so I'm excited!

Yeah, me and Luzhin (Stickarts). Although you ended up behind Crosby and Malkin immediately after being traded until they retired, so hopefully things work out better for Wang Jr.

fits posted:

Wasn't Florida the team last year that had two goon 99OV centres, then their third and fourth line centres combined rating was lower than 99?

Yeah. It wasn't less than 99, but it was close enough (combined 126 -> 67 3rd and 59 4th).

What is it with Florida teams and goons, anyways? Florida drafted 4 goons last year, and then Tampa drafted 4 goons this year. I guess they understand our future star power better than other teams.

Furnaceface posted:

Been there before SJ buddy.

:(:respek::(

Glad somebody has my back. Hopefully I can channel the spirit of McFlurry in goaltending form and turn the Sharks into a dynasty. :unsmith:

Pungry
Feb 26, 2011

JUST PICK ONE. ANY ONE.

Hockles posted:

With the 35th Overall Pick, the Florida Panthers select....

From the Everett Silvertips... Pablo Sanchez.

gently caress yes the Cuban population is going to love me

Hockles
Dec 25, 2007

Resident of Camp Blood
Crystal Lake

On the plus side, everyone isn't going to be an "untouchable" this time. So, it should make for more transactions.

Corsair Pool Boy
Dec 17, 2004
College Slice

Rutkowski posted:

oh man he is gonna have issues with Sheriff Joe.

It's really not fair, he left Venezuela to get away from the hot.

Furnaceface
Oct 21, 2004




Kilza posted:

Glad somebody has my back. Hopefully I can channel the spirit of McFlurry in goaltending form and turn the Sharks into a dynasty. :unsmith:

Little Theo will be your agent. Just ignore the suitcases full of coke and you will be fine!

checksin
Nov 23, 2006

I joined the new sensation, the #RXT REVOLUTION~!

:chillout:

he knows...
@yokozuna
私をファック

Bradf0rd
Jun 16, 2008

Agent of Chaos
:woop: :toot: :woop: #1 pick! Not bad for a guy who is just supposed to hit people and fire slappers from the point. :woop: :toot: :woop:

Stickarts
Dec 21, 2003

literally

Woop. Count me as the one who missed the wooshing sound of this thread getting TAQB'ed. Yea it was me and Kilza and Wang in hockey purgatory/Miami for the longest time. I think Kilza got out first.


Anyway it is truly an honour to be the worst goon draft pick of this year's draft. It has always been my dream to be a Winnipeg Jet. I have never been to a city that metropolitan in nature, or with that temperate of a climate so it definitely gonna take some getting used to. I hear they even have drive thru car washes. Ha. Big city livin'.

Kilza
Oct 4, 2013

Stickarts posted:

Woop. Count me as the one who missed the wooshing sound of this thread getting TAQB'ed. Yea it was me and Kilza and Wang in hockey purgatory/Miami for the longest time. I think Kilza got out first.

Actually, I was stuck in Florida the entire time while you guys both managed to get out. :negative:

Hockles
Dec 25, 2007

Resident of Camp Blood
Crystal Lake

2016 Offseason News

Notable Retired Players
Jarome Iginla
Patrick Marleau
Chris Phillips
Zdeno Chara
Vincent Lecavalier
Kimmo Timonen
Marian Hossa
Matt Cooke
Eric Brewer
Dan Boyle
Daniel Briere
Scott Gomez
Daniel Cleary
Dany Heatley
Pascal Dupuis
Erik Cole
Craig Adams
Radim Vrbata
Brian Gionta
Andrei Markov
Antoine Vermette
Travis Moen
Chris Kunitz
Rob Scuderi
Jordan Leopold
Johan Franzen
Nikolai Khabibulin
Tim Thomas
Michael Leighton


Transaction News
ARZ -- H. Chavez remains unsigned
BUF -- signed rookie Hockles to a 3 year ELC
CGY -- signed rookie T. Kingston Kid to a 3 year ELC
CGY -- I. Strelkov remains unsigned
CHI -- signed S. Samuelsson to a 3 year ELC
COL -- signed W. Van Steamsdyk to a 3 year ELC
EDM -- Yokozuna remains unsigned
FLA -- signed P. Sanchez to a 3 year ELC
MIN -- signed T. Crushinator to a 3 year ELC
MTL -- signed C. Clemens to a 3 year ELC
MTL -- signed A. Robertson to a 3 year ELC
NSH -- signed L. Alger to a 3 year ELC
NJD -- signed W. Clarkson to a 3 year ELC
NJD -- signed R. Picklechips to a 3 year ELC
TBL -- signed B. Banton to a 3 year ELC
TBL -- signed P. O'Bourke to a 3 year ELC
TBL -- S. Pepperdick remains unsigned
TOR -- F. Orphansbane remains unsigned
TOR -- signed E. Windros Jr to a 3 year ELC
VAN -- signed C. Buttworth to a 3 year ELC
VAN -- signed M. O'Leary to a 3 year ELC
WPG -- signed L. Gallant to a 3 year ELC
WPG -- signed S. Saskatanov to a 3 year ELC

BUF -- signed Fredrick Andersen to a 5 year contract
FLA -- signed Anze Kopitar to a 8 year contract
NJD -- signed Braydon Coburn to a 2 year contract
NJD -- signed Antti Niemi to a 2 year contract
SJS -- signed Ryan Kesler to a 3 year contract
VAN -- signed James Reimer to a 2 year contract



2016-17 Opening Night Info
ARZ -- F. Lemur -- assigned to Calgary of the WHL for the 2016-17 season
ARZ -- H. Chavez -- assigned to Kootenay of the WHL for the 2016-17 season
BUF -- Hockles -- assigned to Erie of the OHL for the 2016-17 season
CGY -- T. Kingston Kid -- assigned to Kingston of the OHL for the 2016-17 season
CGY -- I. Strelkov -- assigned to Rimouski of the QMJHL for the 2016-17
CHI -- S. Samuelsson -- assigned to Prince George of the WHL for the 2016-17 season
CHI -- RC Cola -- assigned to Portland of the WHL for the 2016-17 season
COL -- W. Van Steamsdyk -- assigned to Calgary of the WHL for the 2016-17 season
CBJ -- R. Peters -- assigned to Barrie of the OHL for the 2016-17 season
CBJ -- J. Longrod -- 3rd D-Pairing
EDM -- E. Rutkowski -- assigned to Baie-Comeau of the QMJHL for the 2016-17 season
EDM -- R. McPhallus -- assigned to London of the OHL for the 2016-17 season
EDM -- Yokozuna -- assigned to Saskatoon of the WHL for the 2016-17 season
FLA -- P. Sanchez -- assigned tp Everett of the WHL for the 2016-17 season
LAK -- S. McStabson -- assigned to Blainville-Boisriand of the QMJHL for the 2016-17 season
LAK -- B. Bitdiddle -- assigned to Chicoutimi of the QMJHL for the 2016-17 season
MIN -- T. Crushinator -- assigned to Kelowna of the WHL for the 2016-17 season
MTL -- C. Clemens -- assigned to Halifax of the QMJHL for the 2016-17 season
MTL -- A. Robertson -- assigned to Seattle of the WHL for the 2016-17 season
NSH -- L. Alger -- assigned to Niagara of the OHL for the 2016-17 season
NSH -- Zip -- assigned to North Bay of the OHL for the 2016-17 season
NJD -- W. Clarkson -- assigned to Belleville of the OHL for the 2016-17 season
NJD -- R. Picklechips -- assigned to Niagara of the OHL for the 2016-17 season
OTT -- S. Satonaka -- assigned to Kootenay of the WHL for the 2016-17 season
OTT -- F. Stats -- assigned to Belleville of the OHL for the 2016-17 season
PHI -- ThinkTank -- assigned to Kelowna of the WHL for the 2016-17 season
SJS -- A. Kilza -- Backup goaltender
STL -- P. Wang -- assigned to Vancouver of the WHL for the 2016-17 season
TBL -- B. Banton -- assigned to Kingston of the OHL for the 2016-17 season
TBL -- P. O'Bourke -- assigned to Charlottetown of the QMJHL for the 2016-17 season
TBL -- T. Delacour -- assigned to Seattle of the WHL for the 2016-17 season
TBL -- S. Pepperdick -- assigned to Tri-City of the WHL for the 2016-17 season
TOR -- E. Windros Jr -- assigned to Charlottetown of the QMJHL for the 2016-17
TOR -- A. Athanatos -- assigned to Barrie of the OHL for the 2016-17 season
TOR -- F. Orphansbane -- assigned to Brandon of the WHL for the 2016-17 season
VAN -- J. Helar -- assigned to Plymouth of the OHL for the 2016-17 season
VAN -- M. O'Leary -- assigned to Barrie of the OHL for the 2016-17 season
VAN -- C. Buttworth -- assigned to Regina of the WHL for the 2016-17 season
WSH -- J. Hilder -- assigned to Calgary of the WHL for the 2016-17 season
WPG -- S. Saskatanov -- 2nd Line Right Wing
WPG -- L. Gallant -- assigned to Charlottetown of the QMJHL for the 2016-17


Comments
A couple goons made it to the NHL!
Just remember, that if you are under 20 you don't get sent to the AHL, you go directly to CHL. (You are all under 20)
Pepperdick and Orphansbane are still holding out. They are now joined by a few others.
I also included a handful of big free-agent signings.

I'm going to do the first stats update later today, but following that, the updates are going to become more sporadic

CommaToes
Dec 15, 2006

Ecce Buffo
Felix is still stuck in the HHOF, he can't find his way out.

Pleads
Jun 9, 2005

pew pew pew


Ch'town is going to wreck poo poo this season. :getin:

Stickarts
Dec 21, 2003

literally

Hockles posted:

2016 Offseason News

WPG -- signed S. Saskatanov to a 3 year ELC

WPG -- S. Saskatanov -- 2nd Line Right Wing


WELCOME TO WINNIPEG. Quick, someone tell me the last 60th+ overall draft pick to make the bigs as an 18 year old.

Holy poo poo Winnipeg is gonna be bad.


e. And that's a pretty good shortening/maintenence of Russian of my name, hockles, though it muddies my clever, witty Vlad. Nabokov reference.

.Spec
Oct 4, 2001

quote:

FLA -- signed Anze Kopitar to a 8 year contract

Cats gonna be dragging that corpse of Kopitar into the 8th year of that contract.

I feel like there was no place for me going anywhere in the first round but if it means not getting drafted by an abysmal team I'll take my assignment to Prince George.

stab
Feb 12, 2003

To you from failing hands we throw the torch, be yours to hold it high
what are our OVR's?

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Hockles
Dec 25, 2007

Resident of Camp Blood
Crystal Lake

stab posted:

what are our OVR's?

A secret.

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