Architectural failures - "nah, it'll hold." - The Something Awful Forums

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > Architectural failures - "nah, it'll hold."

Number_6: Jul 23, 2006; BAN ALL GAS GUZZLERS

(except for mine); Pillbug

Red Bones posted:

Clifton Cathedral in Bristol, UK.

This would make a great set for a sci-fi or modernist movie or TV show. As a meeting chamber for the Galactic Imperial Star Alliance or whatever.

# ? Mar 20, 2015 07:12

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# ? Jun 3, 2024 09:49

super mario batali: Aug 1, 2013; Dice-a the Mushroom; Grimey Drawer

Honj Steak posted:

Ah, I'm sorry, I even checked a source for the numbers but they didn't bother with a correction.

Let's have Europe's ugliest hospital instead. It's in Aachen, Germany:

It looks like someone just used the clone stamp on a normal sized hospital.

# ? Mar 20, 2015 13:54

Uncle Enzo: Apr 28, 2008; I always wanted to be a Wizard

Omi-Polari posted:

If anyone here ever visits Houston I'd recommend the Rothko Chapel, which is weirdly plopped in the middle of a suburban neighborhood:

Doesn't look like much, does it?

But inside is pretty neat:

It's dead still quiet inside, and there's some Eastern European women of indeterminate national origin working the guest entrance.

That looks like an awesome place to sit and think. It's clearly not fancy but it looks like a great building to gather your thoughts in.

# ? Mar 20, 2015 14:28

Roy: Sep 24, 2007

Ktb posted:

We also have the Arts tower:

Which definitely belongs in this thread because the gap between it and the building on the left is perfectly designed to channel wind down it. This is a major access route into the university and runs under the mezzanine floor you can see in the picture. Students call it "the Arts tower wind tunnel" and if you don't have your coat tightly wrapped around you on a windy day you can actually achieve flight there. Sometimes you see the architecture students visiting it as a cautionary tale of how not to design buildings and remembering to account for existing structures.

Ah yes, the Arts Tower wind tunnel. Sometimes it's so strong the automatic doors on Western Bank just give up.

# ? Mar 20, 2015 14:29

super mario batali: Aug 1, 2013; Dice-a the Mushroom; Grimey Drawer

Check out this brutalist fence.

# ? Mar 20, 2015 14:56

Panzeh: Nov 27, 2006; "..The high ground"

Solus posted:

Don't mind me. Just trying to find a place to Rent.

why_people_live_in_the_burbs.jpeg

# ? Mar 20, 2015 15:04

fuckingtest: Mar 31, 2001; Just evolving, you know?
Right Here, Right Now.

wayfinder posted:

Hah! That was used as a location in the last series of Prime Suspect.

The Munich Schwabylon�a mall, thankfully torn down since. But that building behind it is just to die for as well!

Holy poo poo, it looks like something right out of here:

wayfinder posted:

The International Congress Centre in Berlin, probably the most expensive single building in the city. Nicknamed "Noah's Ark" or "Panzerkreuzer Charlottenburg" (Panzerkreuzer = Battleship, Charlottenburg = the district it sits in). Bonus: It's completely rotten and needs to be torn down, but nobody has managed to come up with a decent plan for that yet.

Also extremely sci-fi, was this designed by James Cameron and re-purposed after the Abyss?

# ? Mar 21, 2015 21:39

the fart question: Mar 21, 2007; College Slice

fuckingtest posted:

Also extremely sci-fi, was this designed by James Cameron and re-purposed after the Abyss?

looks like the atmosphere processor on lv-426

# ? Mar 21, 2015 22:04

Say Nothing: Mar 5, 2013; by FactsAreUseless

This is a hotel.

I'd stay there.

# ? Mar 22, 2015 00:47

Phlegmish: Jul 2, 2011

i had no idea the atomium was a hotel

# ? Mar 22, 2015 00:58

Say Nothing: Mar 5, 2013; by FactsAreUseless

Apparently, it's not.
Never use listicles as a source of information.

# ? Mar 22, 2015 01:46

Honj Steak: May 31, 2013; Hi there.

You can rent the place for conferences though. In each of the spheres there is enough space for a 200 people event.

# ? Mar 22, 2015 01:50

Spatule: Mar 18, 2003

Honj Steak posted:

You can rent the place for conferences though. In each of the spheres there is enough space for a 200 people event.

Been there, done that, they asked us to stop partying so hard because the building was shaking. Still, awesome trippy place, and interesting expos too.
The super long escalators between each sphere have lightshows.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ej8THc-0Ip0

# ? Mar 22, 2015 07:51

super sweet best pal: Nov 18, 2009

gender illusionist posted:

owns

grotto made of wine bottles over many years. He intended it to be like a greenhouse but the bottles block all the light plants need so...

That's really cool.

Omi-Polari posted:

If anyone here ever visits Houston I'd recommend the Rothko Chapel, which is weirdly plopped in the middle of a suburban neighborhood:

Doesn't look like much, does it?

But inside is pretty neat:

It's dead still quiet inside, and there's some Eastern European women of indeterminate national origin working the guest entrance.

It's got a brutalist TOS Trek feel, the kind of place where Kirk would yell at some entity about humanity's worth.

# ? Mar 24, 2015 06:28

Dicty Bojangles: Apr 14, 2001

Rothko Chapel is awesome and in no way belongs in this thread.

# ? Mar 24, 2015 21:36

PhotoKirk: Jul 2, 2007; insert witty text here

Omi-Polari posted:

If anyone here ever visits Houston I'd recommend the Rothko Chapel, which is weirdly plopped in the middle of a suburban neighborhood:

Doesn't look like much, does it?

But inside is pretty neat:

It's dead still quiet inside, and there's some Eastern European women of indeterminate national origin working the guest entrance.

I've been to a wedding at the Rothko Chapel. Before the ceremony, one of the employees used a PA system to inform all of us that it was a "technology-free zone". :psyduck:

"Unguided posted:

It's got a brutalist TOS Trek feel, the kind of place where Kirk would yell at some entity about humanity's worth.

Actually I sat and giggled about someone using a microphone and big-rear end Peavy speaker to tell us not to use technology in the "Technology-free Zone".

# ? Mar 24, 2015 22:16

Yawgmoth: Sep 10, 2003; This post is cursed!

PhotoKirk posted:

Actually I sat and giggled about someone using a microphone and big-rear end Peavy speaker to tell us not to use technology in the "Technology-free Zone".

I hope someone pointed this out to him and then also got super pedantic and started telling him about the technology of the building itself.

# ? Mar 26, 2015 14:03

Rondette: Nov 4, 2009; Your friendly neighbourhood Postie.; Grimey Drawer

You can rent out this building for a holiday.

# ? Mar 26, 2015 14:31

Squidster: Oct 7, 2008; ✋😢Life's just better with Ominous Gloves🤗🧤

Featured many times before ITT, but I still can't get over how hideous the new ROM is.

And it is not only butt-rear end-ugly, it is also 23+ million in debt. When they solicited donations from TO's 1% ten years ago, they forgot to actually get anything in contracts, and so a good number of names on the mega-donors plaques are complete deadbeats. Huge photos of the smiling rich on the walls, who just skipped out on paying.

To be fair, I wouldn't want to pay for that poo poo either.

# ? Mar 28, 2015 15:44

Happy Bear Suit: Jul 21, 2004

Squidster posted:

Featured many times before ITT, but I still can't get over how hideous the new ROM is.

And it is not only butt-rear end-ugly, it is also 23+ million in debt. When they solicited donations from TO's 1% ten years ago, they forgot to actually get anything in contracts, and so a good number of names on the mega-donors plaques are complete deadbeats. Huge photos of the smiling rich on the walls, who just skipped out on paying.

To be fair, I wouldn't want to pay for that poo poo either.

wasn't there some sort of incident where way too much sunlight was coming in from the windows and causing all sorts of damage to the exhibitions so they had to move everything out?

lmao.

# ? Mar 28, 2015 16:09

Jose: Jul 24, 2007; Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer

http://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/architecture-design-blog/2015/mar/25/tallest-building-in-europe-loom-over-tiny-spa-town-of-vals

Someone wants to build the tallest building in Europe in some tiny Swiss town lol

# ? Mar 28, 2015 19:10

Lazermaniac: Sep 2, 2007; Do not stare into beam with remaining eye.

Is Soviet/Russian architecture (or lack thereof) cheating? I've got a few classy photos from my trip to Moscow a few years back:

Here's the building I was born and raised in. Note the yellow external gas line, a paragon of safety and reliability.

Here's a gem from the same general area. Note the sagging concrete beam, "nah it'll hold" exemplified. Why that gap needed a roof in the first place is a separate matter entirely, shrouded in mystery even to the building's occupants.

A view from the apartment I was staying at. Note the completely out-of-place splotch of color in the midst of the otherwise bleak cityscape - one of the newer apartment buildings built in the 90s. My grandfather would always joke that it looks like scrambled eggs with fried onion because of the white-yellow-green-brown color scheme. Also note the various smokestacks in the distance. They're surrounded by residential areas and everyone around is basically resigned to their slightly reduced lifespans. "At least it's not Norilsk", they say.

Here's a real gem, a terrifying monolith stretching for a good quarter of a mile. For a better sense of scale, I invite everyone to have a look at the Street View.

Finally, bottle grotto knows no borders.

# ? Mar 30, 2015 01:36

BrutalistMcDonalds: Oct 4, 2012; Lipstick Apathy

Lazermaniac posted:

Here's a real gem, a terrifying monolith stretching for a good quarter of a mile. For a better sense of scale, I invite everyone to have a look at the Street View.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UUma9jogBDU&t=89s

# ? Mar 30, 2015 02:04

srb: Jul 24, 2007

Now my favourite semi-local monstrosity seems really tame in comparison:

Public library, theater and art museum. They're usually called Kulturhus, literally Culture Building. Because it should only be in one place, apparently.

# ? Mar 30, 2015 02:56

Souvlaki ss: Mar 7, 2014; It's not tomorrow until I sleep

Lazermaniac posted:

Is Soviet/Russian architecture (or lack thereof) cheating? I've got a few classy photos from my trip to Moscow a few years back:

Here's a real gem, a terrifying monolith stretching for a good quarter of a mile. For a better sense of scale, I invite everyone to have a look at the Street View.

that thing is HUGE

# ? Mar 30, 2015 04:45

cloudchamber: Aug 6, 2010; You know what the Ukraine is? It's a sitting duck. A road apple, Newman. The Ukraine is weak. It's feeble. I think it's time to put the hurt on the Ukraine

Lazermaniac posted:

Here's a real gem, a terrifying monolith stretching for a good quarter of a mile. For a better sense of scale, I invite everyone to have a look at the Street View.

Tremble before the sublime...

quote:

Bold, overhanging, and, as it were, threatening rocks, thunderclouds piled up the vault of heaven, borne along with flashes and peals, volcanoes in all their violence of destruction, hurricanes leaving desolation in their track, the boundless ocean rising with rebellious force, the high waterfall of some mighty river, and the like, make our power of resistance of trifling moment in comparison with their might. But, provided our own position is secure, their aspect is all the more attractive for its fearfulness; and we readily call these objects sublime, because they raise the forces of the soul above the height of vulgar commonplace, and discover within us a power of resistance of quite another kind, which gives us courage to be able to measure ourselves against the seeming omnipotence of nature.

# ? Mar 30, 2015 06:26

Rude Dude With Tude: Apr 19, 2007; Your President approves this text.

Ah who doesn't like a nice monolith? Though the local authority have tried their best to hide it with trees http://goo.gl/maps/1hPcu

# ? Mar 30, 2015 07:56

Rough Lobster: May 27, 2009; Don't be such a squid, bro

`Nemesis posted:

It eventually got torn down

This is so ugly it looks exactly like the basic training dorms at Lackland.

Memories...

Omi-Polari posted:

If anyone here ever visits Houston I'd recommend the Rothko Chapel, which is weirdly plopped in the middle of a suburban neighborhood:

Doesn't look like much, does it?

But inside is pretty neat:

It's dead still quiet inside, and there's some Eastern European women of indeterminate national origin working the guest entrance.

Ok now this is some sinister poo poo.

Rough Lobster fucked around with this message at 14:14 on Mar 30, 2015

# ? Mar 30, 2015 14:09

Kavak: Aug 23, 2009

Rough Lobster posted:

This is so ugly it looks exactly like the basic training dorms at Lackland.

Memories...

Why did they make each wall look like a garage door?

# ? Mar 30, 2015 14:15

Default Settings: May 29, 2001; Keep your 'lectric eye on me, babe

Omi-Polari posted:

If anyone here ever visits Houston I'd recommend the Rothko Chapel, which is weirdly plopped in the middle of a suburban neighborhood:

Is this speculative architecture from an alternative timeline where churches double as air raid shelter?

Actually, after writing this line I did a bit of research. Every building on this website is a WW2 air raid shelter ("Hochbunker") in the German town of Trier.

# ? Mar 30, 2015 15:01

a pipe smoking dog: Jan 25, 2010; "haha, dogs can't smoke!"

Default Settings posted:

Is this speculative architecture from an alternative timeline where churches double as air raid shelter?

Actually, after writing this line I did a bit of research. Every building on this website is a WW2 air raid shelter ("Hochbunker") in the German town of Trier.

Why did Germans build their shelters upwards instead of digging them into the ground like everyone else?

# ? Mar 30, 2015 15:11

Default Settings: May 29, 2001; Keep your 'lectric eye on me, babe

Ease of construction. At that point they didn't expect that anything but a direct hit could seriously damage the larger shelters.

# ? Mar 30, 2015 15:20

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

From what I understand, they were right, too.

# ? Mar 30, 2015 17:16

Grand Prize Winner: Feb 19, 2007

Most of 'em are still around too, primarily because it'd be a colossal pain in the rear end to remove that much concrete.

# ? Mar 30, 2015 22:02

Krinkle: Feb 9, 2003; Ah do believe Ah've got the vapors...
Ah mean the farts

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad posted:

Ah who doesn't like a nice monolith? Though the local authority have tried their best to hide it with trees http://goo.gl/maps/1hPcu

Which direction should I be looking to see the monolith? Is it a 2001 style monolith or a washington monument style monolith? I've seriously spun around and looked the hell out of this google maps location and I can't see a monolith, in trees or by trees or above trees. After twelve hours of considering it I think you pasted the wrong thing and didn't notice.

# ? Mar 31, 2015 00:09

strap on revenge: Apr 8, 2011; that's my thing that i say

Krinkle posted:

Which direction should I be looking to see the monolith? Is it a 2001 style monolith or a washington monument style monolith? I've seriously spun around and looked the hell out of this google maps location and I can't see a monolith, in trees or by trees or above trees. After twelve hours of considering it I think you pasted the wrong thing and didn't notice.

the buuilding is loving huge dude

# ? Mar 31, 2015 03:51

Honj Steak: May 31, 2013; Hi there.

Squidster posted:

Featured many times before ITT, but I still can't get over how hideous the new ROM is.

And it is not only butt-rear end-ugly, it is also 23+ million in debt. When they solicited donations from TO's 1% ten years ago, they forgot to actually get anything in contracts, and so a good number of names on the mega-donors plaques are complete deadbeats. Huge photos of the smiling rich on the walls, who just skipped out on paying.

To be fair, I wouldn't want to pay for that poo poo either.

The same architect did the same thing to the museum of military history in Dresden.

---------

Planned 1250 ft (381 m) hotel in Graub�nden, Switzerland.

# ? Mar 31, 2015 09:24

Communist Bear: Oct 7, 2008

Does the guy hate historic buildings or something?

"gently caress you better architecture! gently caress you for being better than me! Just for that, i'm going to grow a triangular tumour out of you!"

# ? Mar 31, 2015 09:32

Krinkle: Feb 9, 2003; Ah do believe Ah've got the vapors...
Ah mean the farts

strap on revenge posted:

the buuilding is loving huge dude

Can you just take a screenshot and draw a red line around it because I can't see it. It's been 24 hours and I can't find it. I see a building. I see another building. Neither is monolithic. I see a van. I see some trees. The trees are not hiding a monolith.

I'm going insane just tell me where the monolith is.

e: are these clouds a monolith? http://i.imgur.com/Be4j3z9.jpg

That building is kind of large I Guess

Krinkle fucked around with this message at 10:19 on Mar 31, 2015

# ? Mar 31, 2015 10:13

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# ? Jun 3, 2024 09:49

Honj Steak: May 31, 2013; Hi there.

Krinkle posted:

Can you just take a screenshot and draw a red line around it because I can't see it. It's been 24 hours and I can't find it. I see a building. I see another building. Neither is monolithic. I see a van. I see some trees. The trees are not hiding a monolith.

I'm going insane just tell me where the monolith is.

It's definitely the monolith.

# ? Mar 31, 2015 10:28

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