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Speaking of bad game design - any game which "cheats" in order to force you to play the game exactly how the designers intend you to, grinds my goat. e.g. in some games like Call of Duty, they have a system in place to stop the player just running past all the enemies, whereby they will just "fake" a fatal shot to come from nowhere and kill the player. In the middle of a battlefield this won't look out of place, but it often happens in areas where you know full well that no enemy could have line-of-sight to the player.
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Mar 25, 2015 16:46
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In World of Warcraft Vanilla, the raid content required players to have several sets of gear: an optimum tank/dps/healing set, and one or more set of elemental resistance boosters. Each set took up at a bare minimum 15 bag slots (correct me if I got that wrong), but at the time the largest feasibly obtainable bag had sixteen slots. In short, if you were raiding you probably had next to no free bag space. For the Test Servers, Blizzard gave testers pre-made characters who had 4 36-slot bags called "Foror's Crate of Resistance Gear." The description on them said "The crates are leaking. Leaking tears."
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Mar 25, 2015 17:15
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Mr. Gibbycrumbles posted:any game which "cheats" in order to force you to play the game exactly how the designers intend you to, grinds my goat. Imagining a beseiged fairy tale farmer here. Mods please change thread title to "Trolls keep grinding my goats"
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Mar 25, 2015 18:26
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Played the original Space Quest when I was about 8 with my neighbour. It took us literally over a year to figure out everyting. Typing hiding commands to hide in the lift when **YOU THINK YOU HEAR FOOTSTEPS**, evading that drat spider, playing slots until we got enough credits for a ship (without the magnet trick). Then we got onto the Sarian ship, got the weapon, and she moved house. Not that it would have made any difference because it turns out we'd forgotten the disc at the start of the game that we needed to difuse the massive starbomb thing at the end.
Tirranek has a new favorite as of 07:09 on Mar 26, 2015 |
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Mar 26, 2015 07:06
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Bureau 13. A point-and-click adventure for DOS. You beat the villain. Your character speaks a single sentence. Then you see the "If you need help, here's a number you can call"-screen you'd see if you'd quit the game manually. And then you're back looking at the DOS prompt. That's it.  Here's an LP: http://lparchive.org/Bureau-13/
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Apr 20, 2015 01:45
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Metal Ray Sunshine posted:If you want a troll ABOUT a video game from developers, here is the reveal of Final Fantasy 7 on PS4. You can just see the disappointment in the crowd after they come back from the trailer... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MY69iVXf7BQ It was such a shitshow!
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Apr 20, 2015 16:05
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Kugyou no Tenshi posted:I don't think it was as bad, as long as you don't count the one game-stagnating bug (something about the parrot or something?). The solution is to get a hot chicken with some sort of topping. The other problem is the small window to get the chicken delivered to the bird before it gets cold. It was a typical case of "save often" and repeat with trial and error. Which pretty much was the rationale for many bizzare gameplay choices as they just assumed someone would just replay. I did ask Al Lowe years ago why Larry games had so many bizarre puzzles, why wasn't there any QA in development? It turns out back then beta testing was pretty much putting people down with a walk-through and making sure the game didn't break. Eye of the Beholder was a great one where it dumped you to some text telling you won after killing the beholder. Return to Zork was another infamous example where right at the start there was a plant where the default control settings suggested you pull it out. That killed it and later brought you into a stalemate as you were unable to progress during the final act. The solution was to dig it up, found in the additional commands button. There was another problem later on where if you didn't have enough items to throw away you were unable to win the game. Homeworld 2 had one where a poster called Arioch was infamous for his rants against the fact they were unable to get the same voice actress as from the last game. (It later transpired they actually did, but she being 8 months pregnant didn't really sound right.) So they snuck in a treat where if your playername was Arioch, you'd get this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zRBmvMNQMmQ
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Apr 24, 2015 08:33
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Etrian Oddyssey is a hardcore dungeon crawling rpg franchise. Some points of interest or events can be investigated for valuable items or a rare chance to recover from damage while in the field. If you're unlucky or make the wrong move, you do risk incurring damage or provoking an enemy encounter, but the rewards usually mean it's worth it to have a look. One of them asks if you want to try and catch a crawfish. You can try as many times as you want but will likely be rewarded with various degrees of failure as the dialog describes your hardened band of adventurers fumbling and splashing in a muddy pond, while the little bastard slips away barely every time and waves its appendages "in a taunting manner". If you persevere, however, which takes quite a few tries and incurs some painful pinches which drain your precious HP, you will eventually catch the thing! Whereupon, basking in the glow of victory, you catch your breath, take a good look at it... and wonder what the hell you wanted it for in the first place, toss it back in its stupid hole, and stomp away.
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Apr 25, 2015 03:45
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The Candle Maiden in Demon's Souls. In DeS, you can buff up your stats only by talking to the Candle Maiden, who can never really die. You can test out your weapons on her, and see how much damage you do. She always respawns. Dark Souls 1 didnt have a candle maiden equivalent, but Dark Souls 2 does, the Emerald Maiden. She is the only way to level up. If you think, like in DeS, that you can just kill her like the Candle Maiden, she dies and can only be revived by paying an amount of souls each time you want to level up. Effectively imposing on you a Stupid Tax
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Apr 25, 2015 09:45
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Cleretic posted:You have to complete the hardest challenge in [Super Paper Mario] twice to face the bonus boss and get the reward, because the game doesn't think you mean it when you do it the first time. Pages and pages and pages back but this was what I came to post, with a small addendum: the cherry on top is that the reward you get is B-button run in the form of an equippable that goes in the same slot as every other tool item in the game. If you want to use it like every other Mario game you need to shuffle it back into the active tool slot after every tool use and this process generally mitigates any of the time you'd save from using it. In a similar vein (and probably already posted too, but whatever): Super Mario RPG has invisible hidden chests that work like hidden blocks in other Mario games. Stand underneath one and jump and claim a prize. Late in the game there's a NPC that tells you about chests and gives you the number of chests you haven't found yet in a form that suggests you're going to get a prize if you find them all. Very early in the game there's a short sequence where a toad escorts you through princess Toadstool's castle. Whenever you enter a room, the toad quickly walks through the exit you need to take. This sequence happens exactly once as it's not a puzzle or anything so there's only one path. In one particular room, if you're fast and precise you can catch up with him, jump onto his head and use the extra height to reach the top of a doorframe where there's a hidden chest with a single frog coin in it - mildly valuable, but still a crappy item for a hidden chest. This chest is completely and utterly inaccessible after this segment, and given some of the weird places some of the chests are serves as a massive gently caress-you to anyone trying to get all of them. Oh, and the reward for actually getting them all? The NPC who talks about them just says "Wow, you got them all!" bucketmouse has a new favorite as of 23:35 on Apr 25, 2015 |
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Apr 25, 2015 23:15
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Killer is Dead has a lot of flaws that I'm willing to forgive, but the fact that the protracted sex scenes that follow every successful Gigolo mission are unskippable seems lazy at best and obnoxious of worst even if it's supposed to serve as some sort of commentary. Especially since you're going to have to sit through 20+ of them to get the achievements related to it.
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Apr 25, 2015 23:24
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Sleeveless posted:to get the achievements related to it. Seems like you trolled yourself 
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Apr 25, 2015 23:26
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The Space Bar is an obscure adventure game from around 20 years ago. Usually adventure games involve a lot of interacting and talking to people, to get hints in completing the game you need to interact and talk to people. It has a few mini-games where you could just shoot the poo poo and gain some stuff. You can talk to people and envoke mini-adventures to discover more of the back story. Needless to say there's a lot you can do and dick around with. But gently caress you if you do, because there's a bomb that's triggered to go off that happens before you even see a half the content that's available. I discovered this game by accident and when I did I enjoyed it. Until trying to figure out on how to complete it was frequently hampered by limited time in trying different things to get to that objective. I guess it learned from Infocom that unless you knew what you were doing before you even started then you're hosed! RPG developers are probably the best trolls of all especially when trying to play a morally good role. A lot of, good, RPG's I've played usually have one or several decisions to take an option that is either evil but good for a few or not as evil but good for the many and still pretty vicious. A morally evil character would usually just say "gently caress it, I'll take what's best for me." But trying to play the nice guy and get handed such a decision... Just do whatever and leave me out of it. Don't ask for my opinion which will implicate me in which I can't escape from!
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Apr 25, 2015 23:55
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death .cab for qt posted:The Candle Maiden in Demon's Souls. I actually fell victim to this. See there's another NPC in the game who is a really weird freak that wants you to go around killing other NPCs, showing them items from their corpse as proof of doing this. This guy sells a lot of unique equipment that you can't get elsewhere though, so you want to complete his quest. With most of the NPCs its not hard to get the item that he wants so you don't have to kill them, or you kill them anyways since you don't care about them. The last item he wants is the Maiden's feather though, and she literally never mentioned the feather so I had no clue how to get it from her. Now due to a series of misunderstandings I thought using a certain item would respawn NPCs (it does not), so I went ahead and killed her anyways for the feather. It was a pretty dumb decision, but what made me feel REALLY dumb was that I found out the Maiden randomly shows up in the very next area and gives you the feather for free there. So if I had just been slightly patient I would of gotten everything I needed easily, instead of loving up my only source of leveling.  There's an even better troll with that guy though. On the opposite side of the room from him is a mysterious lever. In front of the lever is about a dozen messages saying "TURN BACK!", and unlike most messages you see these are from the developers and always show up. The developers do not mislead the player in their messages, so obviously pulling the lever is bad news. If you're a huge idiot and think its just reverse psychology, you'll run up and pull it anyways. Your reward is unleashing the psychopath who then spends the rest of the game harassing you by randomly invading your world in almost every area! 
Internet Kraken has a new favorite as of 04:55 on Apr 26, 2015 |
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Apr 26, 2015 04:52
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The final boss of Ecco the Dolphin is a massive troll. To even get to her, you have to go through a balls-hard auto-scrolling level (Welcome to the Machine) that's super long and basically requires you to just memorize the correct path or else you will die. Oh, and that level itself is a massive troll because at that point in the game, you've just gone back in time after being imbued with god-dolphin powers and you have infinite air and re-generating health. Then you get to a level where both of those are meaningless. Dick move. Anyway, back to the final boss. Once you manage to get through that auto-scrolling level, you're confronted with the alien queen. One of her moves is to suck you into her mouth. If she does this, you are kicked back to The Machine and have to go through the whole drat thing again. Oh, and if you die against this boss? Yep, you also have to go back through The Machine. Then you get to the final, masterful troll: there is a password for the final boss fight that would allow you to bypass The Machine entirely. But the game doesn't give you that password until after you beat the boss, rendering the whole thing moot. Yes, that wouldn't be as much of a problem nowadays thanks to the Internet, but such things didn't exist back when that game was first released. To this day, I have never beaten it, and it's one of my favorite games.
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Apr 26, 2015 18:25
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Silver Falcon posted:Anyway, back to the final boss. Once you manage to get through that auto-scrolling level, you're confronted with the alien queen. One of her moves is to suck you into her mouth. If she does this, you are kicked back to The Machine and have to go through the whole drat thing again. Oh, and if you die against this boss? Yep, you also have to go back through The Machine. From what I can tell, getting sucked into her mouth just does a poo poo-ton of damage that instantly kills you, but it doesn't actually anything to warp you one stage back. This is based on my game genie experience with the code where you never take damage from anything, but it still plays the damage sound effects. Getting sucked into the boss's mouth and hearing Ecco screaming repeatedly against a blood-red background will haunt me forever  That game was so hosed up.
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Apr 26, 2015 20:48
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The White Dragon posted:That game was so hosed up. I'm kinda glad I never got that boss as a kid. The intro where all the sealife gets sucked into the sky alone kinda scared me for whatever reason. The rest of the game I played also just seemed strangely unsettling.
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Apr 27, 2015 16:41
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The White Dragon posted:From what I can tell, getting sucked into her mouth just does a poo poo-ton of damage that instantly kills you, but it doesn't actually anything to warp you one stage back. This is based on my game genie experience with the code where you never take damage from anything, but it still plays the damage sound effects. Getting sucked into the boss's mouth and hearing Ecco screaming repeatedly against a blood-red background will haunt me forever Aha, well it's functionally the same thing, then. If you die against her, you have to go back through The Machine. Agreed that the game is kind of hosed up. I still love it though. Oxyclean posted:I'm kinda glad I never got that boss as a kid. The intro where all the sealife gets sucked into the sky alone kinda scared me for whatever reason. The rest of the game I played also just seemed strangely unsettling. The game scared the crap out of me as a kid. Didn't stop me from loving it.
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Apr 27, 2015 19:00
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Ecco is for real the scariest loving game ever made. gently caress the ocean!
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Apr 27, 2015 19:05
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In EarthBound there's a town called Summers. As with most RPG towns, this one has a shop that sells new, better equipment for your party. The only problem is it's way too expensive! If you've been playing without grinding, you're just going to run out of money buying every single thing there. Summers is also described as a "tourist trap" in game. That's not just for atmosphere. The next town will sell most of the things you could buy in Summers for much less (for example, baseball bat costs $1380 instead of $3080). Of course, first time player will likely spend their money on overpriced items, just because it's an RPG tradition.
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Apr 27, 2015 19:29
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Vookatos posted:In EarthBound there's a town called Summers. As with most RPG towns, this one has a shop that sells new, better equipment for your party. The only problem is it's way too expensive! If you've been playing without grinding, you're just going to run out of money buying every single thing there. Even further back than that, in Mother 1, the Mysterious Teacher at Twinkle Elementary will sell a few things for a good chunk of money. They're all ridiculously expensive, but two of them do have in-battle uses (one of them instantly kills all enemies but kinda sucks because you can get the same effect with PSI Fire Omega and the other is basically Rope that you can use forever so long as you don't trigger the 12.5% chance of it breaking after use) and the other two are definitely troll items. The Last Weapon can be bought for $1048 and tells you how to turn off your NES and the Real Rocket costs $3485 and when you buy it, the teacher accidentally activates it and it lifts off into space.
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Apr 27, 2015 19:37
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Light Gun Man posted:Ecco is for real the scariest loving game ever made. gently caress the ocean!
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Apr 27, 2015 19:39
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My least favorite troll is Del Toro and Kojima canceling Silent Hills 
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Apr 27, 2015 20:00
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NotAnArtist posted:My least favorite troll is Del Toro and Kojima canceling Silent Hills this was the only thing that would've made me purchase a PS4
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Apr 27, 2015 20:17
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Konami is just trolling itself at this point. "Hey guys we got people excited about Silent Hill for the first time in a decade so now let's shut it all down."
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Apr 27, 2015 20:47
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NotAnArtist posted:My least favorite troll is Del Toro and Kojima canceling Silent Hills Is this a real game? It sounds like something my mother would say while complaining about pokemans.
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Apr 27, 2015 20:56
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Dr_Amazing posted:Is this a real game? Not anymore.
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Apr 27, 2015 21:07
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 goddammit konami
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Apr 27, 2015 21:58
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Silver Falcon posted:The final boss of Ecco the Dolphin is a massive troll. This gets even worse/better if you were a kid and got fed up with the game and skipped directly to that fight with the password. Not only do you get the giant alien head out of nowhere, the game bugs out when you die and doesn't trigger a cutscene transition or technically 'kill' you - it just removes your ability to do anything other than rotate and drift slowly and stops the background music. So you're stuck watching ecco's dead body endlessly drift in the water, turning slowly, and every so often you get sucked into the alien's mouth with the accompanying WHOOOSH--GLOORP until you finally realize you can't do anything and turn it off.
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Apr 28, 2015 00:42
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bucketmouse posted:Oh, and the reward for actually getting them all? The NPC who talks about them just says "Wow, you got them all!" This actually reminds me of what happens in Pokemon Red when you complete the pokedex. There's that one guy in Celadon City who wants you to show him a completed pokedex, so something awesome must happen when you do, right? Well, after spending a lot of time trading back and forth and evolving pokemon between red, blue, yellow, gold, silver, AND crystal versions (some pokemon were easier to catch in other versions, like Tauros), I FINALLY managed to have a completed pokedex, all 150 pokemon seen/caught. You know what he gives you for all that effort? The ability to print out a lovely certificate on your game boy printer! I don't even know anyone who had a game boy printer, ignoring the shittiness of the "prize".
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Apr 28, 2015 01:44
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bucketmouse posted:This gets even worse/better if you were a kid and got fed up with the game and skipped directly to that fight with the password. Not only do you get the giant alien head out of nowhere, the game bugs out when you die and doesn't trigger a cutscene transition or technically 'kill' you - it just removes your ability to do anything other than rotate and drift slowly and stops the background music. So you're stuck watching ecco's dead body endlessly drift in the water, turning slowly, and every so often you get sucked into the alien's mouth with the accompanying WHOOOSH--GLOORP until you finally realize you can't do anything and turn it off. Also, if you use the password SHARKFIN (commonly printed in magazines as a cheat)which starts you in The Lagoon (I think its the level just after The Undercaves, so really early) with infiinite air, once you get to the asterite its dialog doesn't trigger and you're stuck forever trying to work out a puzzle that doesn't exist.
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Apr 28, 2015 01:52
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Metal Ray Sunshine posted:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bMjkDFGJ1A I'm confused what the troll is here.
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Apr 28, 2015 02:10
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Bip Roberts posted:I'm confused what the troll is here. They teased the announcement as a major secret and set up this whole loving event just to reveal they were porting the old FF7 PC version to ps4.
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Apr 28, 2015 02:16
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Bip Roberts posted:I'm confused what the troll is here. They are releasing the PC version of a horrible game with nothing upgraded?
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Apr 28, 2015 02:19
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Prokhor Zakharov posted:They teased the announcement as a major secret and set up this whole loving event just to reveal they were porting the old FF7 PC version to ps4. I mean they can't polish a turd so why not rerelease it like everyone has been weeping about.
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Apr 28, 2015 02:38
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Xad posted:I don't even know anyone who had a game boy printer, ignoring the shittiness of the "prize". One of my friends from college had that cert stuck to his bulletin board for the entirety of the time I knew him. I always wondered where it came from. Also my Pokemon shame is hitting 149 and then having a friend corrupt my save by trying to clone mewtwo. The only one I was missing was Tauros. gently caress the safari zone.
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Apr 28, 2015 02:49
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It's especially bad because Square actually does a lot of pretty solid re-releases of Final Fantasy games. Upgraded graphics, content, translation of the really old stuff, sometimes just a whole new engine... the GBA remakes of the sprite Final Fantasy games, the base of which they've continued to use for all other releases of those games, is pretty much the gold standard for how to outright remake a game, while FFX HD is a pretty solid HD re-release of a game that didn't altogether need much updating. The FFVII rerelease is neither of them. It is just a straight port of the game that, across the entire series, needs more than that the most. For being the most famous installment, that game is janky as poo poo, and not often in very endearing ways. If you bought every Final Fantasy game in their most readily-available form right now, and then played them, FFVII would come off the worst because of how desperately in need of updating it is. IX and XII would be the only ones that might get a worse ranking in that listing because they haven't been ported or re-released at all, so you'd be stuck playing them on an original PS1 or PS2; they're still solid otherwise. Cleretic has a new favorite as of 03:02 on Apr 28, 2015 |
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Apr 28, 2015 02:56
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The ff7 remake are sick! Also the pc version butchered the soundtrack. Made it completely midi. Also it had a game crashing glitch during a long cut scene that would happen upwards of 60-70% of the time. So they decided to use the worst version for the remake.
Shwqa has a new favorite as of 03:15 on Apr 28, 2015 |
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Apr 28, 2015 03:13
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Cleretic posted:It's especially bad because Square actually does a lot of pretty solid re-releases of Final Fantasy games. Upgraded graphics, content, translation of the really old stuff, sometimes just a whole new engine... the GBA remakes of the sprite Final Fantasy games, the base of which they've continued to use for all other releases of those games, is pretty much the gold standard for how to outright remake a game, while FFX HD is a pretty solid HD re-release of a game that didn't altogether need much updating. FF IX has the unique distinction of being way better on an emulator than on a PS1, as the developers put too much detail into the textures that cramming it into the native resolution made it look terrible.
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Apr 28, 2015 03:17
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Cleretic posted:It's especially bad because Square actually does a lot of pretty solid re-releases of Final Fantasy games. Upgraded graphics, content, translation of the really old stuff, sometimes just a whole new engine... the GBA remakes of the sprite Final Fantasy games, the base of which they've continued to use for all other releases of those games, is pretty much the gold standard for how to outright remake a game, while FFX HD is a pretty solid HD re-release of a game that didn't altogether need much updating. But you know that if they remastered them, or whatev, they'd have to insert ham handed references to all the compilation games. Nobody in Sector 6: Some people say there is a team of super-SOLDIERS being worked on underground. Crazy, huh? Cloud: I heard there was only one SOLDIER more powerful than Sephiroth.
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Apr 28, 2015 03:21
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