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Knyteguy posted:we have to budget $450 for the baby with babysitting (no it won't be free) it's getting hard to save what I want to save. Good job sneaking that one in there.
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Apr 2, 2015 22:47
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He has his HSA in there and hasn't paid the baby bill yet. He also includes his car value even though he's severely underwater and couldn't liquidate it if he had to. He also has several medical debts that aren't included in his YNAB number.
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Apr 2, 2015 22:47
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Knyteguy posted:Veskit I think you're being too hard on me, and yes we've spent less than we've made: Have your hospital bills even been paid/accounted for yet? Also I'll reserve a big post until you post the O/U for March but how am I being too hard on you? All I'm getting at is that there hasn't been resolution of the underlying issues which will continue to plague your finances, and you keep spending money like an rear end in a top hat. Bugamol posted:He has his HSA in there and hasn't paid the baby bill yet. Answered while I posted that. Also it'd be pretty cool to put out a balance sheet with no liabilities on it and lump my non liquid assets as cash. Veskit fucked around with this message at 23:50 on Apr 2, 2015 |
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Apr 2, 2015 22:49
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Yeah if you look at Tuyop's thread you can see how his mindset changes and that's what affects his spending, and I don't remember much about Cornholio's thread but that's probably similar too. What Veskit is rightly pointing out is that your mindset hasn't changed (well, I feel good about your pot luck/bbq at home idea, and hopeful that between that and not being able to take a young baby out much yet, you'll be able to make some changes to your "take family out for nice dinners" habit). Your other behaviors ultimately haven't changed much: you under-budget and overspend, you flipflop between a bunch of different gimmicky ideas that you think will be that One Weird Trick to Reduce Your Spending, you use money you can't afford to spend as a crutch for every minor inconvenience, and you assume the best financially-speaking without a backup plan for if things go wrong. You feel like you've been doing well because your net worth is going up, but from here, it looks like you've been consistently failing to do what you said you would (meet your budget, cut your groceries). That sounds harsh and I know it'll feel harsh to you, and for that I'm sorry. But the improvements you make feel temporary because they're always getting changed or you have another idea that isn't "knuckle down and stop buying things". And yeah, to answer your previous question, my budget is pretty loose since I don't have many expenses, but I use a cash system for going out and have multiple times had to turn down invitations on a Sunday (I also manage my discretionary by week) by saying I'd gone out too much recently/was out of cash/was going to stay in instead. The last time my discretionary budget went over by a significant amount was July when I went out too many time with different friends. I know this because after I found myself running out of cash early twice in a row, I tracked my purchases with my phone for a while to see what the gently caress.
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Apr 3, 2015 02:24
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Hate to change the subject because this is some good stuff, but wasn't there an offer on the table for a new, substantially higher paying job? Any news related to that?
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Apr 3, 2015 03:40
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Actually back to taxes, I thought KG was expecting something like 4-5k owed because of a wrong deduction level or something? Or did that get resolved?
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Apr 3, 2015 03:55
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My Rhythmic Crotch posted:Hate to change the subject because this is some good stuff, but wasn't there an offer on the table for a new, substantially higher paying job? Any news related to that?
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Apr 3, 2015 05:29
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Iron Lung posted:Actually back to taxes, I thought KG was expecting something like 4-5k owed because of a wrong deduction level or something? Or did that get resolved? I asked the same earlier and looked it up, it was paid off in early January asking with the fees for the apartment. Still haven't heard about verification letters regarding the medical debt though.
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Apr 3, 2015 06:05
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Or the daycare money.
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Apr 3, 2015 06:13
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OK Taxes were ~$2,700 and paid on January 9th yes. They were estimated to be more which was a good thing, since I think we saved a little more than necessary. Regarding the debt verification: I got mad that certified letters with a return receipt were $7 each, and didn't send them. Now mostly I haven't sent them because the baby was born 3 days after all of that and it keeps slipping my mind. I'll do that this month if our misc fund has money in it still. Daycare: talked to my sister yesterday, and we finally agreed on $350/mo. Fair enough I guess. Baby budget is currently $450/mo but I think $500 may be more realistic. It depends. Job: Yea didn't pursue due to the second car. It's very short-term minded with that I think, but that's the position we're in since our emergency fund isn't built up yet. I did just get some interest for a State of NV position in taxation. 50% remote. Except it's in Carson City so my commute would probably be 45 minutes each way when I did need to go in. My review is coming up in May, so I'll probably hang tight until then. Not sure how I'll feel after that. Gotta leave the rest alone for now since I'm at work and it's busiest in the morning.
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Apr 3, 2015 16:32
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Knyteguy posted:Daycare: talked to my sister yesterday, and we finally agreed on $350/mo. Fair enough I guess. Baby budget is currently $450/mo but I think $500 may be more realistic. It depends. How long is she watching the baby for that money? I'm just curious. You labeled that as "baby budget" and not daycare, so is that a pool of all money for the baby's needs? Leaving $100/mo to buy diapers, formula, and whatever else your little guy needs? I know this is your first month of babybudgeting for real, does that seem like a realistic budget? (again, genuinely curious)
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Apr 3, 2015 17:43
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Inverse Icarus posted:How long is she watching the baby for that money? I'm just curious. As much as needed during the weekdays. 3.5 days a week on average most likely. Baby budget is $450 right now. I don't think $100 is enough though so the baby category will likely have to go to $500. We just don't have enough data at the moment to accurately estimate, so I'm hoping that's high. It could be low also.
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Apr 3, 2015 18:36
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Knyteguy posted:As much as needed during the weekdays. 3.5 days a week on average most likely. Look dude by the end of the night everyone is going to tell you how low that really is so bump it up to 200 dollars. Plan for the worst hope for the best. 200 dollars on top of the budget for child care.
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Apr 3, 2015 18:39
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I thought the baby budget was like 650-700.... But I don't attest to my memory being good for other people's numbers, just mine and my company's numbers. 2nd car is NBD. $1500 tops, get a beater.
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Apr 3, 2015 18:52
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Veskit posted:Look dude by the end of the night everyone is going to tell you how low that really is so bump it up to 200 dollars. Plan for the worst hope for the best. OK, I think that's possibly high, but done. SiGmA_X posted:I thought the baby budget was like 650-700.... But I don't attest to my memory being good for other people's numbers, just mine and my company's numbers. It was but that was assuming formula, which we got lucky and don't need. It was actually $910 at one point even. I'll start keeping my eyes open. I don't -need- a car, but it's getting to the point where it would be convenient. Maybe if I see a really smoking deal or something. I did some soul searching last night, and I think part of my financial problem may be that I do kind of like to keep up with the Joneses despite me writing that off earlier in the thread. Or at least I don't like 'looking poor'. Like I get kind of embarrassed riding my bike to work, or having beat up pilling thrift store furniture. Just some stupid insecurities I guess. I know that like my brother-in-law and sister-in-law with their brand new couches and patio furniture, and a lot of the people all around me driving new trucks and stuff are riddled with debt, but it is what is. Part of that is where I came from I think, but that's not a good excuse. That's something I'll need to work on.
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Apr 3, 2015 19:18
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Knyteguy posted:I did some soul searching last night, and I think part of my financial problem may be that I do kind of like to keep up with the Joneses despite me writing that off earlier in the thread. Or at least I don't like 'looking poor'. Like I get kind of embarrassed riding my bike to work, or having beat up pilling thrift store furniture. Just some stupid insecurities I guess. I know that like my brother-in-law and sister-in-law with their brand new couches and patio furniture, and a lot of the people all around me driving new trucks and stuff are riddled with debt, but it is what is. Part of that is where I came from I think, but that's not a good excuse. That's something I'll need to work on. For what it's worth, I work at Google and about a third of my coworkers ride bikes to work. It doesn't necessarily mean you're not well off, you might just like biking or be doing it for your health or any number of reasons. What I'm saying is, don't assume that people immediately jump to "Oh it must be because they're poor" when they see you biking to work, for example, because I don't think people will actually make that assumption.
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Apr 3, 2015 20:37
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“You will become way less concerned with what other people think of you when you realize how seldom they do.”
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Apr 3, 2015 20:40
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Knyteguy posted:I did some soul searching last night, and I think part of my financial problem may be that I do kind of like to keep up with the Joneses despite me writing that off earlier in the thread. Or at least I don't like 'looking poor'. Like I get kind of embarrassed riding my bike to work, or having beat up pilling thrift store furniture. Just some stupid insecurities I guess. I know that like my brother-in-law and sister-in-law with their brand new couches and patio furniture, and a lot of the people all around me driving new trucks and stuff are riddled with debt, but it is what is. Part of that is where I came from I think, but that's not a good excuse. That's something I'll need to work on. Our CEO a couple days ago was talking about taking BART to work, and mind you he's a CEO of a fortune 500 company soooooooooo.... Also cognitive behavioral therapy is pretty much made for you I can't stress that enough that you should go.
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Apr 3, 2015 20:44
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Alternatively, stop giving a gently caress about what people think about you. You're not here to impress anyone. Your couch is just a place to rest your rear end, as long as there's not a spring stabbing you there's no reason to compare yours to your inlaws. You have a brand new baby. If there was ever a time for you to "get away" with not keeping up with the joneses, to tell people that you can't go out to dinner, it's now. There's no silver bullet or magic wand we can wave to make you care less about what people think about you, but at the end of the day you come home to your (immediate) family, and they have the only opinions that really matter. edit: ufsteph posted:“You will become way less concerned with what other people think of you when you realize how seldom they do.” Never heard this but I likes it.
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Apr 3, 2015 20:58
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It's one of many great quotes from David Foster Wallace, Infinite Jest
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Apr 3, 2015 21:03
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^ Cool looking book; I haven't heard of it before but I may pick it up. Also I just found this for CBT: http://www.get.gg/cbtstep1.htm I'll give it a shot. Thanks for the suggestion.
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Apr 3, 2015 23:20
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You should post your March YNAB.
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Apr 3, 2015 23:25
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Bugamol posted:You should post your March YNAB. dangit Bugamol hold your horses i will i promise It's not pretty though. However a couple small things were supposed to roll into April, so I want to get that in order and stuff. It's stuff that was purchased and posted on the 31st and stuff in case anyone jumps on me for that.
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Apr 3, 2015 23:30
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Knyteguy posted:^ Cool looking book; I haven't heard of it before but I may pick it up. You need to go see someone for it to be effective dude you can't just read a quick how to. It's the difference between medicine and homeopathy.
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Apr 3, 2015 23:33
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Oh man. If you have problems with what others think of you now, you're gonna have a hell of a time being a parent. Other parents have this wonderful way of being incredibly judgmental of your parenting skills. You're not making your own baby food? You monster. No cloth diapering, either? Call loving CPS. I swear, I had to stop listening to/reading parental advice. It can really kill your self esteem.
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Apr 4, 2015 02:15
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Veskit posted:You need to go see someone for it to be effective dude you can't just read a quick how to. It's the difference between medicine and homeopathy. Yes this 1000 times, but its more like the difference between medicine and webMD. It helps a LOT to go in and talk with someone, you'll uncover stuff you never thought bothered you or was an issue. It's a really good and helpful process.
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Apr 4, 2015 02:15
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I don't understand how it takes so long to get your YNAB in order. It's not a complicated thing, and you really shouldn't be making so many purchases so often as to need longer than maybe an hour, tops, since you can't use the mobile app, to get all your transactions in order. My YNAB is pretty much presentation ready at any given moment, at best, after any given day, at worst. If a month wasn't up to date and solid three days into the next month, my OCD would be in full overdrive.
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Apr 4, 2015 04:22
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zamin posted:I don't understand how it takes so long to get your YNAB in order. It's not a complicated thing, and you really shouldn't be making so many purchases so often as to need longer than maybe an hour, tops, since you can't use the mobile app, to get all your transactions in order. Well I have all the data and stuff in there I just want to redate some transactions I wanted to post in April. Like we bought a home good for $40 on the 31st that should count against this months budget. I just gotta do it, get the o/u written up real quick and I'll post it all here. Tomorrow is crazy busy from 7am on and tonight I'm still working on the yard... Sunday afternoon I'll get it all posted.
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Apr 4, 2015 04:26
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Knyteguy posted:Well I have all the data and stuff in there I just want to redate some transactions I wanted to post in April. Like we bought a home good for $40 on the 31st that should count against this months budget. I just gotta do it, get the o/u written up real quick and I'll post it all here. Date transactions when you spent the money. Not when you want it to come out of your budget. So I guess post April too since it sounds like you're moving stuff around.
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Apr 4, 2015 04:40
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Knyteguy posted:Well I have all the data and stuff in there I just want to redate some transactions I wanted to post in April. Like we bought a home good for $40 on the 31st that should count against this months budget. I just gotta do it, get the o/u written up real quick and I'll post it all here.
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Apr 4, 2015 04:43
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Hahahahaha is this still April Fools?
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Apr 4, 2015 04:55
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Zanthia posted:I'm far from a financial wizard, but that sounds like the definition of a shell game to me. If you spent the money on the 31st, it's still a March expense. You should've waited until the 1st if you wanted it to go on the next month. It wasn't a want it was a need or we would have waited. I'm using April's money because it works well enough in the budget for it. Anyone can call it what they like. This is functionally the same as a rollover which we just proved we were able to do successfully with pet food despite everyone saying otherwise pretty much. I will post April as well I haven't moved anything yet.
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Apr 4, 2015 05:19
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Knyteguy posted:This is functionally the same as a rollover which we just proved we were able to do successfully with pet food despite everyone saying otherwise pretty much. I will post April as well I haven't moved anything yet. Then why move it to April? Why not just lower April's budget? It seems like you're making all kinds of work for yourself here.
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Apr 4, 2015 05:44
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You were able to do it with pet food by completely forgetting you had stocked up, you don't get any credit for that. And pet expenses are relatively fixed, it's not like you were going to splurge on an expensive dinner or something. In case you've somehow forgotten, you've been completely unable to 'rollover' your grocery and restaurant spending, which are categories where you have more freedom to mess things up. Once again, you over count your wins and undercount your losses.
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Apr 4, 2015 06:19
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in_cahoots posted:You were able to do it with pet food by completely forgetting you had stocked up, you don't get any credit for that. And pet expenses are relatively fixed, it's not like you were going to splurge on an expensive dinner or something. I didn't forget that we stocked up. I keep close tabs on pet food. Pet expenses can be fixed, but it definitely doesn't have to be. People spend tons of money on their pets, and there's easily some stuff we want but don't need and hold off on. Bugamol because lowering the budget doesn't have the visual of having the money shown spent. I can reference what happened easily, and look at the transaction easily. Plus it makes it easier to convey information here instead of needing a paragraph explaining it. Lowering the budget works fine too I just didn't think of that here. We spend too much time fighting over methodology it's kind of pointless guys don't you think? Sometimes it just doesn't matter. Rolling that money over, or lowering the budget this month aren't going to ultimately change the spending or saving in any way.
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Apr 4, 2015 15:04
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Knyteguy posted:We spend too much time fighting over methodology it's kind of pointless guys don't you think? Sometimes it just doesn't matter. Rolling that money over, or lowering the budget this month aren't going to ultimately change the spending or saving in any way. This is my big problem with you right now. You have a forum full of people who have their financial poo poo together, several of whom did so after years of making (and fixing) their own Bad Money Decisions, telling you that the methodology DOES matter. You, on the other hand, keep trying to just Do Your Own Thing and fudge numbers around to tell us that no, you've got this, it's totally gonna work THIS MONTH, guys.
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Apr 4, 2015 15:18
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overdesigned posted:This is my big problem with you right now. You have a forum full of people who have their financial poo poo together, several of whom did so after years of making (and fixing) their own Bad Money Decisions, telling you that the methodology DOES matter. You, on the other hand, keep trying to just Do Your Own Thing and fudge numbers around to tell us that no, you've got this, it's totally gonna work THIS MONTH, guys. KG is a guy who's played a lot of video games. He doesn't really want to spend the time grinding out his finances, he wants to find the cheat code.
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Apr 4, 2015 15:20
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So it was a need you didn't budget for, is what you're saying; and moving it to April makes the numbers look good, and makes you feel better. Okay, SlowMo. (Please don't get that bad.)
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Apr 4, 2015 15:38
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Knyteguy posted:We spend too much time fighting over methodology it's kind of pointless guys don't you think? Sometimes it just doesn't matter. Rolling that money over, or lowering the budget this month aren't going to ultimately change the spending or saving in any way. You're the one doing it. The entire thread has been shouting "MAKE A BUDGET AND STICK TO IT FOR THREE MONTHS" for about a year now, and every month it's like you're discovering how to make a budget all over again, shifting things around in a shell game to make yourself feel better about the numbers. Make a budget. DON'T CHANGE IT. Roll you overages into the next month and spend less to make it up. DON'T CHANGE IT. Live within the budget, even when family asks you out to dinner. DON'T CHANGE IT.
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Apr 4, 2015 17:08
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Inverse Icarus posted:You're the one doing it. The entire thread has been shouting "MAKE A BUDGET AND STICK TO IT FOR THREE MONTHS" for about a year now, and every month it's like you're discovering how to make a budget all over again, shifting things around in a shell game to make yourself feel better about the numbers. This seems like something everyone should empty-quote for a page or so.
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Apr 4, 2015 17:29
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