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ufsteph posted:Do you know this guy? Maybe you can still spend some time with the dog on the ranch? No (it's a lady). But I like the idea of asking for rights to visit every now and then. Cicero posted:Selling the dog seems like a great idea. You guys probably have your hands full with an infant as it is, one less mouth to feed, easier to move, and it sounds like the dog may even be happier in the new situation. I don't want to get rid of her by any means, but if it's genuinely better for her then it's something that should probably be done. I just got some more details. She wouldn't only be a work dog she would be a pet. And the ranch owner does have other dogs so she would have company. I'm thinking of taking her there to setup a visit to see how she interacts.
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Apr 22, 2015 00:22
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I might have missed it, but what did your wife think of the final decision (that may not be final anymore) to break another lease and move to Dallas with your newborn? How much would you be budgeting for travel throughout the year? I don't see how someone as family oriented as you would be able to withstand visiting family at least quarterly. I know people here point out the time line of events when you decide major things all of the sudden, but have you actually sat down and looked at it? Something like that would be really helpful for your therapist as well.
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Apr 22, 2015 00:28
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Yes, yes please. It's better for the dog, your budget, you and your wife, and for your kid. (The breed is notorious for nipping and biting kids.)
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Apr 22, 2015 00:30
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Knyteguy posted:On the topic of pets. We got an offer for $200 for our Australian Shepherd. A ranch owner wants her as a work dog. I think this may be better for all parties, since her need for exercise is insatiable. She would have a job and I think she would love it. Our current dog would be able to stay in the house all day which would make her happier as well. We'd save probably 1/3 on food costs plus potential vet costs. This sounds like a great opportunity. If you can see where the dog will live and perhaps see the lady's other working dogs that would put your mind at ease. I love my pets so I understand how you feel but a really energetic dog will be so much happier as a work/pet combo (in a good environment of course). My husband's aunt takes in dogs like this to work on her ranch and they're the happiest dogs I've ever seen. I'm overwhelmed in general by how many major decisions seem to crop up for you and your wife in such a short timespan, but this one seems like a no-brainer if the new home is a good one.
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Apr 22, 2015 00:41
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I don't know, I feel like you guys are being kind of harsh. He hasn't made any decisions, there's not a decision to make yet, it's not like he's been offered the job. He's just interviewing, and there's no harm in that. He was encouraged to look for a better job by the thread, and that's what he is doing. Sure, he's excited and posting about it a lot, but he hasn't made any decisions beyond talking to recruiters, so maybe y'all should chill out a little. Some of you seem to think he has made some kind of decision jobs wise, and he hasn't, not beyond starting to look for something better. Who cares about how many interviews he does? It's all good experience. If he gets some kind of offer, I'm sure he'll talk it over with his wife and this thread. edit: Also, KG, do what's good for the dog, you know this is a better situation.
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Apr 22, 2015 00:48
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Jesus Christ dude, slow the gently caress down. And for gently caress's sake whatever you do, don't verbally agree to any contracts with the recruiter without speaking to the thread first. And no, mistakes he's already made: Decided to take the Texas offer already (which might not even materialize) (lol what) Started looking for distant work without talking to his wife (maybe?) Told a recruiter his salary while he's being dramatically underpaid Agreed to a 2-week exclusivity contract -- by week 1.5 you're going to be getting one hell of a hard sell from them, and it's entirely possible recruiters will lie to you to get you to agree to an offer they get you Recruiters should be handled with caution because they're sharky as hell and will totally spin you around if you let them, and you should stop agreeing to things when they tell you it's for your own good, because they're looking at 3-months salary as a commission if they place you and it's much better for them to place you right away than to spend possibly four or five times as long for maybe a 10-20% salary increase for you. I'm in the same industry but a much different situation, so it's hard for me to know numbers and what you should be getting for your experience or how your job prospects currently are for your location, but tech is full of people who will take advantage of you for profit or fun and you should seriously not get lulled into overconfidence. Colin Mockery fucked around with this message at 00:59 on Apr 22, 2015 |
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Apr 22, 2015 00:56
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I'm getting this feeling all of the stuff he's posting now happened like a month ago because there is no way nobody is this bad at following advice. Rule number one of negotiating is don't advertise your current salary. Repeated multiple times, then you went and did it. Come on man.
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Apr 22, 2015 01:59
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Uncle Jam posted:I'm getting this feeling all of the stuff he's posting now happened like a month ago because there is no way nobody is this bad at following advice. I didn't feel like arguing with recruiters, when the salary range of the positions are clearly posted. They said they do their best to fight giving the employer this information. I think they use it more as a range of what jobs I may be interested in. I'm not going to be pushed into something guys. Even if I don't find something through this recruiting agency it's not the only place to find a job. I'm on my mobile so I can't address everything, but I think Rhea is spot on w/ the assessment. Thanks btw. Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 03:22 on Apr 22, 2015 |
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Apr 22, 2015 03:04
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Besides more $$$, what do you want from a new job? I think it will help you a lot to sit down and write a summary of where you want to go in your career, what skills you will need to develop to get there, and why that's the path for you. This will help you understand what YOU want, and when you're on job interviews you can interview the company to see if they are the right place for you. Confidence in your value and clarity in what you want out of a job will make interviews a breeze and will impress the hell out of people.
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Apr 22, 2015 03:28
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Knyteguy posted:I didn't feel like arguing with recruiters, when the salary range of the positions are clearly posted. They said they do their best to fight giving the employer this information. I think they use it more as a range of what jobs I may be interested in. You're still not understanding what people are saying. The recruiter's goal is to get you a job as quickly as possible. When you say $60k they frame it as, "this guy will be happy with 75k so I'll shoot for jobs in the 70-90k range". You'll interview for the job without knowing the salary, and then they'll come back saying 75k is the best they could do. It's a waste of your time and motivation. Worst case, there's a job out there that you would love for 100k but now you've poisoned the well and can't get more than 80k from them. Just because a range is posted doesn't mean that you have to accept the bottom of that range. And why would you believe the recruiter when they say they'll 'fight' to avoid giving that information? You know that information is harmful so don't give it to them. Don't leave it up to a recruiter to decide.
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Apr 22, 2015 03:44
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Any time I see like 50 new posts on KG's thread...  KG you need to be prepared for the very real and distinct possibility that your boss is going to cockblock you. I know you're buddies with him and all, but that should give you more reason to be suspicious and not less. Ultimately I'm just a guy on the internet and I don't know him or you, but that sounds like one of those situations that is not going to go well. Touchy negotiations could be involved, the kind that are going to leave less experienced negotiators feeling very, very unhappy.
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Apr 22, 2015 03:46
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in_cahoots posted:You're still not understanding what people are saying. The recruiter's goal is to get you a job as quickly as possible. When you say $60k they frame it as, "this guy will be happy with 75k so I'll shoot for jobs in the 70-90k range". You'll interview for the job without knowing the salary, and then they'll come back saying 75k is the best they could do. It's a waste of your time and motivation. Worst case, there's a job out there that you would love for 100k but now you've poisoned the well and can't get more than 80k from them. All of this is completely correct. Stop sabotaging yourself. Edit: from now on, before you make a decision, you should seriously ask yourself "will this course of action be detrimental to my wife and child?" slap me and kiss me fucked around with this message at 04:08 on Apr 22, 2015 |
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Apr 22, 2015 04:00
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I agree, if your current job situation isn't horrible, do not give your current salary to any recruiters or companies. You may have to be the first one to 'give a number' as far as what you want or expect (you want to avoid this too if possible, but it's not as damaging and can be much harder to avoid), and in that case you can simply be very aspirational, but giving your current salary is just no-win.
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Apr 22, 2015 04:06
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in_cahoots posted:You're still not understanding what people are saying. The recruiter's goal is to get you a job as quickly as possible. When you say $60k they frame it as, "this guy will be happy with 75k so I'll shoot for jobs in the 70-90k range". You'll interview for the job without knowing the salary, and then they'll come back saying 75k is the best they could do. It's a waste of your time and motivation. Worst case, there's a job out there that you would love for 100k but now you've poisoned the well and can't get more than 80k from them. Yup, going to agree here. All of this is spot-on. You KNOW giving out that information is bad for you, whether it's to a recruiter or to an interviewer. Don't volunteer it. Period.
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Apr 22, 2015 04:07
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Knyteguy posted:Alright so here's how my company works, and how it worked in the past. So you're basically staying in the exact same job, just taken out the middle man (your current employer) and being paid by them directly?
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Apr 22, 2015 04:12
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Knyteguy posted:I didn't feel like arguing with recruiters, when the salary range of the positions are clearly posted. They said they do their best to fight giving the employer this information. I think they use it more as a range of what jobs I may be interested in. You don't loving get it. You completely hosed one of your avenues to significantly higher income. You actively made a decision that reduces your potential earnings by tens of thousands of dollars. You turned a possibly great opportunity into a probably poo poo one. Why? Because you were too loving lazy to argue with someone who doesn't have your best interests in mind. Your post reads as "I couldn't be bothered to take this opportunity seriously, despite the fact that everyone who's been trying to help me up to this point has told me how to do so." I'm seriously mindfucked that you would just toss away all that potential for money because you couldn't be assed to care for all of 10 minutes. If you want to hit those lofty pie-in-the-sky goals, you should be treating every single opportunity like this as if it's once in a lifetime and capitalizing on it as much as possible.
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Apr 22, 2015 04:23
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Cicero posted:You may have to be the first one to 'give a number' as far as what you want or expect (you want to avoid this too if possible, but it's not as damaging and can be much harder to avoid), and in that case you can simply be very aspirational, but giving your current salary is just no-win. And if they really force you, name a number at 1.5-2x market rate and say you're willing to consider lower.
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Apr 22, 2015 04:56
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I have an interview for a six figure job on Thursday and two 90k jobs tomorrow. I think it's a bit much to say I hosed my chances. I've made it abundantly clear the salary range I'm looking for. They have on record that I applied for a $150,000/yr job and a $115000-130000/yr job they're not assuming I want a $5000 raise. On top of all of that I'm quoting their own salary survey for the industry when they ask where I'm getting the idea for my number and I'm then telling them I'm looking for higher than that. Hah alright^. I fully intend to negotiate if I get an offer.
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Apr 22, 2015 05:03
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Knyteguy posted:I have an interview for a six figure job on Thursday and two 90k jobs tomorrow. I think it's a bit much to say I hosed my chances. I've made it abundantly clear the salary range I'm looking for. They have on record that I applied for a $150,000/yr job and a $115000-130000/yr job they're not assuming I want a $5000 raise. Is that what the recruiter told you? Because they're probably also been given a range by the company and they're going to tell you the highest end of up and maybe even fudge a bit more on it. Then when the offer isn't actually that it's all "well we really really tried, I don't think we'll do any better anywhere else, better just sign here at the bottom so I can collect my commission cheque"
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Apr 22, 2015 05:08
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Knyteguy posted:I think it's a bit much to say I hosed my chances. You straight up made it harder for yourself because you decided to be lazy instead of putting in 10 minutes of work. If you can't see that, I don't know what else to say.
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Apr 22, 2015 05:26
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I don't think you seriously hosed your chances up (you might have wrecked your chances with the current recruiter you're using, depending on how lovely they are) and I can understand that sometimes it feels hard to say no or push back against a recruiter who's giving you a hard sell or otherwise pressuring you. But you made a mistake. It's a recoverable mistake and it's not even a huge mistake (there's always other recruiting companies, so who cares). But you should understand that you made a mistake and why people see it that way, so that you can prevent yourself from doing it again. There's nothing wrong with making mistakes and it's a normal part of life, but it's very important that you learn from your mistakes and I think sometimes you fail to do this. The reason people are freaking out is because it looks like you're falling into the "make serious financial decisions really quickly without thinking everything through first" pattern again, and not because you made a one-time "oops I revealed something I shouldn't have and have less leverage now" mistake.
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Apr 22, 2015 05:52
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So, is Mrs. Knyte totally cool with the idea of relocation?
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Apr 22, 2015 07:04
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Knyteguy posted:I have an interview for a six figure job on Thursday and two 90k jobs tomorrow. I think it's a bit much to say I hosed my chances. I've made it abundantly clear the salary range I'm looking for. They have on record that I applied for a $150,000/yr job and a $115000-130000/yr job they're not assuming I want a $5000 raise. Please explain how if you took a 100k/yr job that involves relocating to an area with these great features will be better for you: * No family to assist with childcare and significantly increased childcare costs. * Very likely higher cost of living * Incurring one time relocation expenses that may not be paid by new employer. P.S. you don't really have the cash for it. Remember the whole reason you broke your lease in the last place so you could be closer to your mom or was it KGwife's mom? Apparently that wasn't important enough to stay around? Why can't you just be a grown up about the entire thing and try to get a job that allows you to stay where you are? You're not at a point in your life where relocating makes much sense. Find a 80k/yr job that lets you work remotely. This whole thing feels like you're crossing the line from impulsive to flat out stupid.
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Apr 22, 2015 11:05
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Is your aussie shepherd spayed? My wife had a thought that the rancher is going to turn her into a puppy mill brood mare if she isn't.
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Apr 22, 2015 11:14
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ladyweapon posted:I might have missed it, but what did your wife think of the final decision (that may not be final anymore) to break another lease and move to Dallas with your newborn? How much would you be budgeting for travel throughout the year? I don't see how someone as family oriented as you would be able to withstand visiting family at least quarterly. RC and Moon Pie posted:So, is Mrs. Knyte totally cool with the idea of relocation? The Texas job he's "decided to take" (at Bar) is remote. They talked, she/they was/were most comfortable staying near family. If I'm reading correctly, there is another Dallas job (the one he applied first for that got this all rolling). That one is ~$130k/yr and not remote. IllegallySober posted:
This is a very standard lease in many parts of the country. It is in the standard lease where I live, which is pretty tenant friendly. "Duty to mitigate damages" is a very real thing, and very enforceable. It will require KG to do some work if they don't follow it, but the burden of proof is very much on the landlord. Knyteguy posted:I have an interview for a six figure job on Thursday and two 90k jobs tomorrow. I think it's a bit much to say I hosed my chances. I've made it abundantly clear the salary range I'm looking for. They have on record that I applied for a $150,000/yr job and a $115000-130000/yr job they're not assuming I want a $5000 raise. I've spent an entire post defending you here, so one last thing for you: Like horking said, you made a mistake telling them your salary. It's recoverable, but it is a mistake. People are jumping all over you, and it's making you defensive. Take a breath, step away from your defensiveness for a second and understand that this probably wasn't the best thing to do. Even if you can't admit it to the thread, at least admit it to yourself and fix it next time. As for the job situation, I think a better way to think about it (and a way that would have engendered a less... energetic response from the thread) would have been to say "My wife and I talked it over, and we'd strongly prefer to remain local. I'm going to do the interviews, and use that as confidence when attempting to transfer to Bar. If an offer comes around that blows me away, or if Bar isn't as open to a transfer as I was hoping, we'll reconsider." My feeling is that is actually how you guys are feeling, and you just stated it differently, but I might just be reading too sympathetically. Also, as many people have said, if you haven't, it is important to ask your wife specifically something like: "Hypothetically, if I could transfer to bar for $85k or move to Dallas for $120k, what would you do?" Not just "we might move, what do you think about that?" It is easy to mentally jump over that to "we probably won't move." Make sure you talk extensively about your lives if you were to move. Would she stay home? How would you meet new people (ESPECIALLY if she's staying at home with a newborn. That can be very isolating)? How often would you travel back and how would you budget for that? Grumpwagon fucked around with this message at 12:51 on Apr 22, 2015 |
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Apr 22, 2015 12:43
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Why in the world would you sign a lease like this?
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Knyteguy posted:I have an interview for a six figure job on Thursday and two 90k jobs tomorrow. I think it's a bit much to say I hosed my chances. I've made it abundantly clear the salary range I'm looking for. They have on record that I applied for a $150,000/yr job and a $115000-130000/yr job they're not assuming I want a $5000 raise. How do you know the salaries for all of these positions? Very rarely do job postings ever post the salary. Is the recruiter telling you these salaries? If so, they are almost certainly inflating the numbers or flat out making them up.
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Apr 22, 2015 13:24
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Taco Box posted:Is your aussie shepherd spayed? My wife had a thought that the rancher is going to turn her into a puppy mill brood mare if she isn't. Spayed yes. Grumpwagon posted:The Texas job he's "decided to take" (at Bar) is remote. They talked, she/they was/were most comfortable staying near family. If I'm reading correctly, there is another Dallas job (the one he applied first for that got this all rolling). That one is ~$130k/yr and not remote. This. There are two Texas jobs. Bar (which is 99% remote), and this Dallas job is one I'm interviewing for tomorrow. Your phrased much of this better than I did. Regarding salaries: salary of jobs are posted on their website. Did I make a mistake telling the recruiters my salary? Yes probably. My wife is willing to move if we have to, as am I. Neither of us want to. That's why much of this is probably going to be interview practice regardless of the outcome (I'll bring it up in here if I get any offers). As far as what I want out of my career it's making really good money. I don't plan on working forever so I'm willing to sacrifice much of my short term happiness if it means reaching the goals for our long term happiness faster. I'm reading about the first company now. It's a Skype interview. 1 hour 45 minutes. Another at 1:00pm (4.75 hours)
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Apr 22, 2015 16:16
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Knyteguy posted:I'm willing to sacrifice much of my short term happiness if it means reaching the goals for our long term happiness faster. Your actions don't support this statement.
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Apr 22, 2015 17:15
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ufsteph posted:Your actions don't support this statement. Really? I'd love a second car right about now.
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Apr 22, 2015 17:23
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Knyteguy posted:Really? I'd love a second car right about now. We all have things that we want. If you had stayed in your old apt and used the money you paid for the lease breaking fee and new deposit, you could have gotten a second car. If you had been willing to forgo the luxury of a new car, you wouldn't have a $500 car payment.
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Apr 22, 2015 17:37
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Knyteguy posted:Really? I'd love a second car right about now. Please open those floodgates. I do enjoy when someone goes through your posts and lists all the contradictory statements and decisions you've made. 
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Apr 22, 2015 17:37
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ufsteph posted:If you had stayed in your old apt and used the money you paid for the lease breaking fee and new deposit, you could have gotten a second car. That goes beyond sacrificing short term happiness and goes into the holy gently caress if we're here another minute we're going to become genuinely depressed. There are levels of sacrifice and the apartment was not one I and especially my wife was willing to make any longer. We still are in a cheaper place than when the thread started. Something like $1,650 per month before to $1,100 now. And our rent is like 22% of our monthly income on a bad month and 16% on a good month. It's not like we're living in Hearst Castle. quote:If you had been willing to forgo the luxury of a new car, you wouldn't have a $500 car payment. We would have a $560 car payment and we'd be paying $100 more in interest every month towards a car loan. I posted the info not that long ago. Yes the car was still a bad choice and we're paying for that decision now. It doesn't mean I'm not sacrificing short term happiness right now either this isn't a completely black and white matter.
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Apr 22, 2015 17:44
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Knyteguy posted:Yes the car was still a bad choice and we're paying for that decision Fixed that for you.
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Apr 22, 2015 17:51
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Nocheez posted:Fixed that for you. quote:Yes the car was still a bad choice and we're paying for that decision But really we're not going to take 6 years to pay off this dumb car. We'll be in a place to start making dents in the next few months. Like $800-$1000/mo assuming no new job and accompanying income.
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Apr 22, 2015 17:55
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Interview in 4 minutes and I have a migraine that covers a quarter of my vision. gently caress.
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Apr 22, 2015 17:56
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One interview down. I'd give myself a C. "We'll continue down the path and see where it takes us." was the end of the interview there. However he said if I want any updates to email the recruiter, and if he has questions for me he'll do the same. It's in a small city in Illinois so I'm not too upset if nothing happens. Next interview today is in super rural Virginia (1,000 population town).
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Apr 22, 2015 18:48
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foxatee posted:Please open those floodgates. I do enjoy when someone goes through your posts and lists all the contradictory statements and decisions you've made. OK! Here's today: Knyteguy posted:We still are in a cheaper place than when the thread started. Something like $1,650 per month before to $1,100 now. And our rent is like 22% of our monthly income on a bad month and 16% on a good month. It's not like we're living in Hearst Castle. Here's November 21, 2013 Knyteguy posted:My brother in law had a totally weird moment when he found out about my job. The day after we found out I got the job he basically got really jealous and insecure, saying that we all live in really nice houses (my wife and I were sharing a 950 sq/ft house with my sister and two kids for $400/mo) and that we need to be more thankful to him for serving in the military and that he really deserves stuff like that. It was really weird and it definitely hurt our relationship. It's been awkward ever since. Those numbers clearly are different! But I wouldn't want three adults and three kids (and maybe one more, I'm not really sure which sister it was that KG was sharing the house with) plus that herd of animals is a bit much for 950 square feet. Not to mention how much brother in law is going to flip his poo poo once he learns KG is going to get EVEN MORE MONEY to do computer hacking all day long.
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Apr 22, 2015 18:48
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Antifreeze Head posted:OK! Brother in law is good now. He got military benefits for PTSD so they're practically in early retirement. 950 sq/ft is where we moved from to our 1,800 sq/ft townhouse which is the rent I'm talking about. The house with 3 adults, 2 kids, 3 dogs, and 4 cats @ 950sq/ft was still better than that apartment.
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Apr 22, 2015 18:50
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I figured there was probably some mental health issue there, so its good he is getting help. Here's another bit though: Knyteguy posted:He just sent me another email as well that said it's been a good month for cash flow, he just hasn't been paid yet. I mean Amazon's recruiters have invited me twice to expense paid interviews in Vegas and stuff, and two other firms found me on LinkedIn that would mean probably a six figure income (extremely in demand stuff) but if poo poo were to really hit the fan it's difficult to say if I could find something -that- quickly. Plus it would require at least a month of planning with relocation to who knows where. I think it would be wise to get an emergency fund going. That guy made a pretty good point there. You should probably listen to what he had to say. EDIT: Knyteguy posted:One interview down. I'd give myself a C. "We'll continue down the path and see where it takes us." was the end of the interview there. However he said if I want any updates to email the recruiter, and if he has questions for me he'll do the same. Was it Urbana? They developed a pretty kickin' rad computer there, you should probably have taken it more seriously. Seriously though, good luck with the search. Antifreeze Head fucked around with this message at 18:59 on Apr 22, 2015 |
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Apr 22, 2015 18:54
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Per the current salary disclosure chat, I totally get that software recruiters are always super pushy about your current salary and try to leverage that info against you like people have said. In my job searches and working with recruiters, the best way I was able to deflect that question and keep the conversation framed around my desired salary was to say something to the effect of "My current salary is a part of my contract, and I signed an NDA with <company> when signing this contract. I'm currently looking for a salary in the range of $X-$Y" or something to that effect. They will keep pushing and be annoyed sometimes, but if you keep sticking to the NDA story they will give up.
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Apr 22, 2015 19:10
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