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POOL IS CLOSED
Jul 14, 2011

I'm just exploding with mackerel. This is the aji wo kutta of my discontent.
Pillbug
Screaming Idiot, your inbox is full. What are you storing in there?

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Screaming Idiot
Nov 26, 2007

JUST POSTING WHILE JERKIN' MY GHERKIN SITTIN' IN A PERKINS!

BEATS SELLING MERKINS.

RedTonic posted:

Screaming Idiot, your inbox is full. What are you storing in there?

Scandalous secrets.

Also, clearing space now.

After The War
Apr 12, 2005

to all of my Architects
let me be traitor

supermikhail posted:

For a couple of days I've intermittently sat looking at my currect writing project. Quite gloomily I must say... I think it wouldn't come as a surprise to anyone if I said that I've almost never had fun writing it. But frankly, over the years I've formed the impression that you aren't really supposed to have fun while writing, and it's never struck me as strange for an unpaying hobby which nobody cares about, until now that other hobbies have been leaving my repertoire, mostly due to the fact that I would spend a significant portion of time staring at a blank page or screen or procrastinating, painfully, while attempting to do these hobbies. The situation is exacerbated by my having other activities to compare writing to, such as programming, which is for me mostly productive and engaging.

These are not pleasant thoughts to have, since I, like probably most people here, have aspired to writerhood since a very young age.

You’re certainly not doing yourself any favors with this approach, you’re just going to end up hating the process and hating your output. It’s a lot like exercise – if you’re straining and injuring yourself but keep the same routine and tell yourself things like “pain is weakness leaving the body” you’ll end frustrated, injured, and angry with nothing to show for it. You need to find what’s effective for you.

What do you like to read? What makes you say “drat, I want to be doing that”? Go back and look over your favorites, think about what makes them work for you. What part of the process do you like? Just do that, whatever it may be, for however long you want – you’re not on a deadline. After a while, the blank screen will become an extension of that process. I always go back to that Rick Demarinis quote: “writing isn’t hard work, it’s hard play.”

Screaming Idiot beat me to the agency thing, but it's a big reason of why we read (and write) fiction. Characters need desires and choices to make. Even if the protagonist just bounces from event to event, the other characters around them are making decisions and taking actions (Arthur Dent, for instance, is "hitch-hiking" around all the other character's stories). Without that, we may as well be reading treatises on rock formation.


supermikhail posted:

A man wakes up in a forest, with only a laptop computer in his possession. Almost immediately he meets a young woman who announces that he's the messiah of her cult, and he's destined to save the world. Also straightaway they discover that the computer has a wireless connection to the fabric of reality, and the man can potentially "hack" the world, if he knew the right commands.

The pair, together with a few other people, travel, overcoming some obstacles, to the leader of J's (which I'll call the woman here) cult. On the way R (the man) learns the codes for the world in an ancient sanctuary*. The leader of the cult sends J and R on a quest to the Source Tower, which contains the source code for the world, which R could modify, to save the world from the dark lord C (all the letters are less embarrassing than the actual names) who's also hacking the world.

Right after this plotdump, in a scuttle with some of C's goons, R gets knocked out, and awakes in a detention facility where he's been kept sedated as a dangerous criminal, with all of the previous story revealed as a dream. Unfortunately, he's not given much time to do anything with this revelation, sedated again, and sent back into the dream.

That's enough of that, I think. Some other elements worth mentioning: during the rest of the story R loses consciousness several more times, and during each period finds himself coming to in a different situation, such as where R is an artificial intelligence that scientists are testing in a simulated reality. In addition, the narrator is at least supposed to be an active force in the story, guiding, misleading, or just mocking R from time to time.

The protagonist's action is defined entirely through gaining and losing consciousness and having information revealed to him. Who is he? What does he want? What does the cult want to achieve? (A cult or secret society that isn't trying to achieve anything is just a social club.) Learning that reality itself is affected by apparently disconnected actions must seriously screw with his worldview, especially since, even though you mention dream states, it doesn't sound like you're going for magical realism. If the mysterious narrator (the most interesting character you describe) is trying to force events one way, the characters need to put up some kind of resistance to create a conflict.

I know we're always told to phrase our ideas as "what if?", but to be a story, it should be followed up with "who would?" Let us know who these people are and why they'd want to do anything you're having them do. Just forcing your characters from point to point while they scowl gets old pretty fast.

Benny the Snake
Apr 11, 2012

GUM CHEWING INTENSIFIES
Hey is there a musically-inclined goon who'd be gracious enough to help me with a project? PM me if you're down and thanks!

supermikhail
Nov 17, 2012


"It's video games, Scully."
Video games?"
"He enlists the help of strangers to make his perfect video game. When he gets bored of an idea, he murders them and moves on to the next, learning nothing in the process."
"Hmm... interesting."

Screaming Idiot posted:

Dude, don't do this, you're bringing up old, irrelevant garbage and causing undue prejudice as well as making yourself a magnet for negative attention -- any praise your idea would otherwise receive will be negated, and your criticism will be unduly harsh as a result.

Anyhow, your idea's intriguing, but the main character ("R") doesn't seem to have much agency -- same problem I have in my stories. Give him a reason other than "he woke up and a chick jumps out and screams 'HAIL TO THE CYBER-MESSIAH!'" and "poo poo just keeps happening to him man, I don't know what the deal is!" You need to give him a clear story arc, and what you have currently are a series of vignettes that seems to rely on its gimmick than any substance.

If you're embarrassed by your character's names, why did you name them that? If you like the names, use the names and to hell with opinion. If you don't, why use them? Don't be ashamed of your work -- hell, one of the main characters in my novel is named Darkside Black for Chrissakes, and another's named Pepper Zesty, your stuff can't be worse than that.

Finally, don't post ideas, post your work. Everyone has ideas, not many people make them reality. Put pen to paper, fingers to keyboard, and write.

Things to try to redeem myself:

I quite recently tried to pass by anonymously in another thread, and was recognized with "We remember you, and we didn't like you that time", pretty much, so I though I'd be better to come out with myself honestly upfront. :shrug: I guess I was wrong.

I see the non-agency thing, but it's hard to think how to mediate that. You've probably noticed that the plot is at least trying to be, er, meta (?), or philosophical, and I think the protagonist is not supposed to have many preconceived ideas or experience to rely on. In other words, he's supposed to be amnesiac, although I'm also struggling with that. Obviously, it doesn't limit what could motivate him post-startum. I'm open to ideas. Maybe I'd need to divulge the philosophical framework the story is based around, so you, guys, would see how it does, and especially doesn't, work?

The names... well, what the hell. J is Joyce, C is Cartesius, and R is Rick who, in company with another character, D, make up Rick Deckard. You figure it out. :rolleyes:

I can post work, but I have troubles with more high-concept stuff, rather than the nitty-gritty. That is to say, the nitty-gritty is quite problematic too, but I know what the problems are, and potentially how to fix them, which I'm leaving for a hopefully second and later drafts. If you like, tell me what particular places you want to see, but expect quality from poor to hilarious.

After The War posted:

What do you like to read? What makes you say “drat, I want to be doing that”? Go back and look over your favorites, think about what makes them work for you. What part of the process do you like? Just do that, whatever it may be, for however long you want – you’re not on a deadline. After a while, the blank screen will become an extension of that process. I always go back to that Rick Demarinis quote: “writing isn’t hard work, it’s hard play.”

That's where there's a rather significant problem. I'm quite a big fan of comedy, such as Terry Pratchett, but I can't do comedy to save my life, and I could prove it if an occasion arose. And how he was able to connect the dots and weave the layers, which there must be some satanic rutial for. Oh, I've recently discovered that I get off on skillful, professional characters, realism, and historical detail, for which A/T somehow seldom ends up being much help in my case. :shrug: I know, rules number 1, 2, and 3 of Writing Club are "Write What You Know", but somehow that doesn't work for me.

quote:

The protagonist's action is defined entirely through gaining and losing consciousness and having information revealed to him. Who is he? What does he want? What does the cult want to achieve? (A cult or secret society that isn't trying to achieve anything is just a social club.) Learning that reality itself is affected by apparently disconnected actions must seriously screw with his worldview, especially since, even though you mention dream states, it doesn't sound like you're going for magical realism. If the mysterious narrator (the most interesting character you describe) is trying to force events one way, the characters need to put up some kind of resistance to create a conflict.

I know we're always told to phrase our ideas as "what if?", but to be a story, it should be followed up with "who would?" Let us know who these people are and why they'd want to do anything you're having them do. Just forcing your characters from point to point while they scowl gets old pretty fast.

Yeeeah. I constantly struggle mightily with what the characters are supposed to be like. I began with, "I have a vague idea and will figure it out as I go along", then for a while wrote basically different aspects of myself, then tried to consciously decide the personalities, and now I'm writing off people and characters I know, more or less. In other words it's a mess. In addition, I'm worried about how much I could strain the patience of my potential audience. For example, how much should Rick freak out before he appears annoyingly hysterical? How in-the-face should the narrator's interference be so as not to grow old towards the end of the story?

Oh.

Benny the Snake posted:

Hey is there a musically-inclined goon who'd be gracious enough to help me with a project? PM me if you're down and thanks!

I'm sure there is no dearth of musicians here, but I'd like to inquire how musical they should be? I'm slightly musical, I reckon about 5/10.

angel opportunity
Sep 7, 2004

Total Eclipse of the Heart
Try actually writing a bunch of different stuff instead of getting stuck on this one idea that isn't even good. Write like ten short stories of 1-3k length, post them here for crits after each story is done, and after ten of these if you still want to write boring guy in a coma, then go for it. My guess is that you won't want to anymore.

supermikhail
Nov 17, 2012


"It's video games, Scully."
Video games?"
"He enlists the help of strangers to make his perfect video game. When he gets bored of an idea, he murders them and moves on to the next, learning nothing in the process."
"Hmm... interesting."
It sounds like good advice, but it hasn't helped in the past. Instead, after every batch of short fiction I guess I've arrived at more and more boring long plots? (If this one strikes you as boring.) I have to consider the possibility that long fiction requires a slightly different set of skills than short. Unfortunately, if so, it takes considerably more time to hone them through practice.

Also, I don't know if it matters, but I've been writing this story for about a year now. Maybe it's time to give up on it. In that case I reckon I'd take a break from writing for a year too (instead of following your advice), because one has got to give that anger at oneself some time to dissipate. I don't know how much easier I could make a story for myself! I mean, it requires no realism at all, you can make up all places and characters and culture. In fact, events and story progression don't have to be natural or consistent. :argh:

Alternatively, perhaps you know what particularly long-form skills I could be working on? I'm a bit at a loss, although I'm not feeling very lucid right now. Short stories involving the same characters all the time to develop consistency and natural progression? Established characters in random situations which I couldn't control, to learn to improvize? I don't know. I think these would still come with the feeling of only having a few short hundred words to go through, to a glorious conclusion, and be done, whereas in a novel you might not reach any conclusion for several thousand words... And working on just outlining -- nobody here at least would care. And it's kind of important. You might have scintillating prose and characters that all but jump off the page, but if you don't tie your threads at the end, or worse still, don't have much of an ending, readers (and you, more importantly) will come away dissatisfied. And that's still a bit of a mystery to me. (As well as all the other things I've complained about previously.)

Note to self: Have to remember to start making a point instead of thinking aloud in threads like this.

angel opportunity
Sep 7, 2004

Total Eclipse of the Heart
Yeah, I can only like 70% follow what you are talking about, but I think I know what you mean.

I was under the impression you hadn't written anything...when you say working on for a year, how many words do you have written down of this story? Can you post the first chapter?

If you have like tens of thousands of words already written on this, and if you have dozens of pieces of short fiction already completed, then I retract most of my advice.

I write mostly short fiction and I have taken two stabs at a novel. The first novel I got to 50k words and gave up, the second I gave up after less than 15k words. Writing long novels is REALLY HARD compared to shorts, and it definitely does take a a lot of different skill sets. I've personally decided to focus more on shorts until I improve my prose and ability to create good characterization etc., but some people feel that novel writing is its own skill and that you should constantly be practicing it if you ever want to get good at it.

My advice to write a lot of short fiction stems mostly from seeing people in CC who say they have been working on a novel for years in a vacuum, who then end up posting excerpts, and nearly every time the writing is just awful.

On the other end, I've seen people from CC who can write really effective short fiction flounder at novels. The prose might be good, and the execution scene-for-scene might be okay, but overall the whole thing just lacks cohesion and tends to go nowhere. I was reading first drafts and nothing polished, but basically these were novels that I wouldn't choose to read unless you forced me to. And these are the "better writers" who are writing short fiction every week and taking the whole 'writing thing' very seriously.

If a few people in this thread telling you that your idea sucks is enough to make you quit writing for a year, then I don't really know what to say.

I would post an excerpt of what you have, get the criticism, and work on improving your craft.

angel opportunity fucked around with this message at 16:34 on Apr 21, 2015

Stuporstar
May 5, 2008

Where do fists come from?
I was going to write a long post about how if you can't sum up your story in one sentence, you haven't figured out what your story is really about yet (or why someone should care), but then I found this blog post that goes into detail a lot better than I could: http://blogs.brighton.ac.uk/writing/2013/12/21/how-to-write-a-book-blurb-or-a-book-synopsis/

supermikhail
Nov 17, 2012


"It's video games, Scully."
Video games?"
"He enlists the help of strangers to make his perfect video game. When he gets bored of an idea, he murders them and moves on to the next, learning nothing in the process."
"Hmm... interesting."
@angel opportunity:

Okay, but there's no point in posting an excerpt without going over it myself, so I'm going to engage in some editing. At least that'll be something to do with writing. Although I foresee some problems such as not having a definite (or maybe any) idea where it's going, and thus I'm not sure what I'm going to do with the tone and characterizations. So I guess I'll try to do the best I can so as not to have the easy out of "Well, it's just a draft" if I get bad reactions. :-) Expect this to take a while.

And I don't have chapters now, not sure if I'm ever going to. Chaptering is just not something that occurs to me naturally, so I think I'll just look for a good cut-off at around 1000 words, 2000 tops.

@Stupostar:

I know this one! Rule 5 of the Writing Club, if I'm not mistaken. :-)

Look, I don't mean to offend, but right now I'm on the side that doesn't consider creative writing an exact science, and I don't think I care about the number of sentences someone can sum something up in. Give me characters or situations that the audience can identify with, an issue they care about... And I can't give myself even that, not to mention one-sentence blurbs.

In fact, even as far as selling books (which I'm not concerned with), I'm pretty sure I've never bought a book that came with a one-sentence blurb (this is a lie, see below). I need at least a paragraph, and then I'm going to sample extensively. You'd be better off making that one-sentence blurb the title, as far as I'm concerned. :-)

Actually, I've just looked, and on my Kindle currently there is only one book with a one-sentence blurb, and I'm not sure I even read it (the blurb). It's specialized, non-fiction, and I already knew what it's about.

Dr. Kloctopussy
Apr 22, 2003

"It's time....to DIE!"

supermikhail posted:

@angel opportunity:

Okay, but there's no point in posting an excerpt without going over it myself, so I'm going to engage in some editing. At least that'll be something to do with writing. Although I foresee some problems such as not having a definite (or maybe any) idea where it's going, and thus I'm not sure what I'm going to do with the tone and characterizations. So I guess I'll try to do the best I can so as not to have the easy out of "Well, it's just a draft" if I get bad reactions. :-) Expect this to take a while.

And I don't have chapters now, not sure if I'm ever going to. Chaptering is just not something that occurs to me naturally, so I think I'll just look for a good cut-off at around 1000 words, 2000 tops.

@Stupostar:

I know this one! Rule 5 of the Writing Club, if I'm not mistaken. :-)

Look, I don't mean to offend, but right now I'm on the side that doesn't consider creative writing an exact science, and I don't think I care about the number of sentences someone can sum something up in. Give me characters or situations that the audience can identify with, an issue they care about... And I can't give myself even that, not to mention one-sentence blurbs.

In fact, even as far as selling books (which I'm not concerned with), I'm pretty sure I've never bought a book that came with a one-sentence blurb (this is a lie, see below). I need at least a paragraph, and then I'm going to sample extensively. You'd be better off making that one-sentence blurb the title, as far as I'm concerned. :-)

Actually, I've just looked, and on my Kindle currently there is only one book with a one-sentence blurb, and I'm not sure I even read it (the blurb). It's specialized, non-fiction, and I already knew what it's about.

Why even ask for advice if you are just going to argue with it anyway?

ravenkult
Feb 3, 2011


supermikhail posted:

@angel opportunity:

Okay, but there's no point in posting an excerpt without going over it myself, so I'm going to engage in some editing. At least that'll be something to do with writing. Although I foresee some problems such as not having a definite (or maybe any) idea where it's going, and thus I'm not sure what I'm going to do with the tone and characterizations. So I guess I'll try to do the best I can so as not to have the easy out of "Well, it's just a draft" if I get bad reactions. :-) Expect this to take a while.

And I don't have chapters now, not sure if I'm ever going to. Chaptering is just not something that occurs to me naturally, so I think I'll just look for a good cut-off at around 1000 words, 2000 tops.

@Stupostar:

I know this one! Rule 5 of the Writing Club, if I'm not mistaken. :-)

Look, I don't mean to offend, but right now I'm on the side that doesn't consider creative writing an exact science, and I don't think I care about the number of sentences someone can sum something up in. Give me characters or situations that the audience can identify with, an issue they care about... And I can't give myself even that, not to mention one-sentence blurbs.

In fact, even as far as selling books (which I'm not concerned with), I'm pretty sure I've never bought a book that came with a one-sentence blurb (this is a lie, see below). I need at least a paragraph, and then I'm going to sample extensively. You'd be better off making that one-sentence blurb the title, as far as I'm concerned. :-)

Actually, I've just looked, and on my Kindle currently there is only one book with a one-sentence blurb, and I'm not sure I even read it (the blurb). It's specialized, non-fiction, and I already knew what it's about.

what the gently caress are you talking about

Stuporstar
May 5, 2008

Where do fists come from?

ravenkult posted:

what the gently caress are you talking about

He's unable to articulate his ideas clearly and concisely, and is now arguing against trying to do so. :ironicat:

Tyrannosaurus
Apr 12, 2006
Seems like you like talking about writing (or not writing) a whole lot more than actually loving doing it.

Martello
Apr 29, 2012

by XyloJW

supermikhail posted:

@angel opportunity:

Okay, but there's no point in posting an excerpt without going over it myself, so I'm going to engage in I need to do some editing. At least that'll be something to do with writing. Although I foresee some problems such as not having a definite (or maybe any) idea where it's going, and thus I'm not sure what I'm going I'm not sure where it's going or what I want to do with the tone and characterizations. So I guess I'll try to do the best I can so as not to have the easy out of "Well, it's just a draft" if I get bad reactions. :-) Expect this to take a while. This will take a while.

And I don't have chapters now, not sure if I'm ever going to. Chaptering is just not something that occurs to me naturally, so I think I'll just look for a good cut-off at around 1000 words, 2000 tops. :stare: Uh holy gently caress

@Stupostar:

I know this one! Rule 5 of the Writing Club, if I'm not mistaken. :-)

Look, I don't mean to offend, but right now I'm on the side that doesn't I don't consider creative writing an exact science, and I don't think I care about the number of sentences someone can sum something up in. Give me characters or situations that the audience can identify with, an issue they care about... And I can't give myself even that, well that's true at least not to mention one-sentence blurbs.

Just cut all this: In fact, even as far as selling books (which I'm not concerned with), I'm pretty sure I've never bought a book that came with a one-sentence blurb (this is a lie, see below). I need at least a paragraph, and then I'm going to sample extensively. You'd be better off making that one-sentence blurb the title, as far as I'm concerned. :-)

Actually, I've just looked, and on my Kindle currently there is only one book with a one-sentence blurb, and I'm not sure I even read it (the blurb). It's specialized, non-fiction, and I already knew what it's about.

edited your writing for you bud

The Saddest Rhino
Apr 29, 2009

Put it all together.
Solve the world.
One conversation at a time.



supermikhail posted:

@angel opportunity:

Okay, but there's no point in posting an excerpt without going over it myself, so I'm going to engage in some editing. At least that'll be something to do with writing. Although I foresee some problems such as not having a definite (or maybe any) idea where it's going, and thus I'm not sure what I'm going to do with the tone and characterizations. So I guess I'll try to do the best I can so as not to have the easy out of "Well, it's just a draft" if I get bad reactions. :-) Expect this to take a while.

And I don't have chapters now, not sure if I'm ever going to. Chaptering is just not something that occurs to me naturally, so I think I'll just look for a good cut-off at around 1000 words, 2000 tops.

@Stupostar:

I know this one! Rule 5 of the Writing Club, if I'm not mistaken. :-)

Look, I don't mean to offend, but right now I'm on the side that doesn't consider creative writing an exact science, and I don't think I care about the number of sentences someone can sum something up in. Give me characters or situations that the audience can identify with, an issue they care about... And I can't give myself even that, not to mention one-sentence blurbs.

In fact, even as far as selling books (which I'm not concerned with), I'm pretty sure I've never bought a book that came with a one-sentence blurb (this is a lie, see below). I need at least a paragraph, and then I'm going to sample extensively. You'd be better off making that one-sentence blurb the title, as far as I'm concerned. :-)

Actually, I've just looked, and on my Kindle currently there is only one book with a one-sentence blurb, and I'm not sure I even read it (the blurb). It's specialized, non-fiction, and I already knew what it's about.

Well you were worried about being disliked and honestly this is not endearing yourself to people.

Djeser
Mar 22, 2013


it's crow time again

Creative writing isn't an exact science, and any rule you learn is going to be a rule you can toss aside once you've decided you don't need it. But that doesn't mean that a rule isn't helpful, even if it's not always going to be helpful or necessary. There's a lot of those handy rules of thumb I use when I'm writing short fiction, and sometimes I won't follow them, but I still think they're pretty useful. Knowing a rule, and knowing why it helps, lets you make a conscious decision about whether you want to do this thing or not.

I think describing your story in one sentence is a good rule of thumb to use if you're not sure if what you're writing is contributing to the story or not. If you clarify what you're writing about to yourself, you'll be able to better judge whether the scene you're writing right now contributes to the arc of the story. It doesn't even need to contain the plot, as long as it gets to what the story is about. Then you can make an educated decision about whether what you're writing contributes to that, and if it doesn't contribute, you can decide whether you want to keep it anyway.

To make a long post short, writing 'rules' are more like tools you can use to make smarter decisions about your writing, not edicts you have to abide by.

sebmojo
Oct 23, 2010


Legit Cyberpunk









Benny the Snake posted:

Hey is there a musically-inclined goon who'd be gracious enough to help me with a project? PM me if you're down and thanks!

I'm musical as a motherfucker but I'm not gonna do poo poo with you until you tell me you've read those books I told you to read

Stuporstar
May 5, 2008

Where do fists come from?

The Saddest Rhino posted:

Well you were worried about being disliked and honestly this is not endearing yourself to people.

Yep. Anyone who reacts to advice with, "Yeah, I know but I'm not gonna do it for [reasons that demonstrate how you fail to comprehend the point of the exercise]" only proves himself an idiot who's wasting everyone's time.

Supermikhail, your lack of communication skills is another reason people get fed up with you. You type like your brain is dribbling out your ears. Your fuzzy writing demonstrates fuzzy thinking. You've even admitted you don't know what the gently caress you're on about, so learn to cut your bullshit to the bone. Learning how to edit may help you not be such a blithering rear end in a top hat.

Stuporstar fucked around with this message at 01:13 on Apr 22, 2015

Stuporstar
May 5, 2008

Where do fists come from?

Djeser posted:

I think describing your story in one sentence is a good rule of thumb to use if you're not sure if what you're writing is contributing to the story or not. If you clarify what you're writing about to yourself, you'll be able to better judge whether the scene you're writing right now contributes to the arc of the story. It doesn't even need to contain the plot, as long as it gets to what the story is about. Then you can make an educated decision about whether what you're writing contributes to that, and if it doesn't contribute, you can decide whether you want to keep it anyway.

This too. That one sentence is the backbone to the story. Of course the whole story can't be told in one sentence—that's why you're writing out a whole loving story—but without that backbone, the story is limp.

quote /= edit

Dr. Kloctopussy
Apr 22, 2003

"It's time....to DIE!"

Stuporstar posted:

This too. That one sentence is the backbone to the story. Of course the whole story can't be told in one sentence—that's why you're writing out a whole loving story—but without that backbone, the story is limp.

quote /= edit

What if my story is more like the Human Centipede?

Stuporstar
May 5, 2008

Where do fists come from?

Dr. Kloctopussy posted:

What if my story is more like the Human Centipede?

Then you have a trilogy on your hands.

Cpt. Mahatma Gandhi
Mar 26, 2005

Stuporstar posted:

Then you have a trilogy on your hands.

So you get three sentences to describe the story in this case, yeah?

Stuporstar
May 5, 2008

Where do fists come from?

Cpt. Mahatma Gandhi posted:

So you get three sentences to describe the story in this case, yeah?

Yep. Them's the rules.

Screaming Idiot
Nov 26, 2007

JUST POSTING WHILE JERKIN' MY GHERKIN SITTIN' IN A PERKINS!

BEATS SELLING MERKINS.
Supermikhail, just write. That's all you need to do. Take your ideas and poo poo them down onto the screen, and worry about making them good later. You don't need validation from us to write, you don't need validation from anybody, you just need to put in the time and effory. Worry about criticism and all that afterward.

Fumblemouse
Mar 21, 2013


STANDARD
DEVIANT
Grimey Drawer

supermikhail posted:

Ooh. Something to look forward to, depending on how people here judge on the following issues.

You may remember me as that person whom nobody likes in CC, or if I'm fortunate you don't remember me at all.

The latter. Lucky me.


It's been recently suggested to me that I don't know how to have fun, and that has caused me to take a bit of a review of my hobbies and entertainments, in the process discarding some of them, at least temporarily. But you know where this is going. For a couple of days I've intermittently sat looking at my currect writing project. Quite gloomily I must say... I think it wouldn't come as a surprise to anyone if I said that I've almost never had fun writing it. But frankly, over the years I've formed the impression that you aren't really supposed to have fun while writing, and it's never struck me as strange for an unpaying hobby which nobody cares about, until now that other hobbies have been leaving my repertoire, mostly due to the fact that I would spend a significant portion of time staring at a blank page or screen or procrastinating, painfully, while attempting to do these hobbies. The situation is exacerbated by my having other activities to compare writing to, such as programming, which is for me mostly productive and engaging.

This is called writing. It's a bitch and it's hard. Writing doesn't care if you do it or not, only you do. Make that decision.


These are not pleasant thoughts to have, since I, like probably most people here, have aspired to writerhood since a very young age.

Yes. Many of us aspirational writers are now sad middle aged fucks who wasted years programming, getting drunk, laid, married and ensprogged instead of spending the actual time required to learn to write. Many of us are aren't, or are in part. Don't waste time analyzing this. Time is short.



So, noticing that a little earlier in this thread one poster suggested to another to drop their premise, maybe the problem is my current story. Mind you, I've never had any luck with works of such size (aiming for a novel). And maybe my fun-deficiency goes deeper than that, into my premises and plots. But it's best to provide an illustration. My current premise/plot:

A man wakes up in a forest, with only a laptop computer in his possession. Almost immediately he meets a young woman who announces that he's the messiah of her cult, and he's destined to save the world. Also straightaway they discover that the computer has a wireless connection to the fabric of reality, and the man can potentially "hack" the world, if he knew the right commands.

Amnesia is possibly the laziest writing trope in the world. Essentially you are doing this so that you can place the reader in the same plight as the protagonist. The second laziest plot in the world is the Chosen One. You are doing this so that you can make the reader care what the protagonist does. Both are lazy, failure prone ways to get the reader on side, when what you really want to do is create an interesting character caught up in an interesting situation.

So who is this person - what do they know about themselves. Does the Chosen one trope happen in every VR? How are you possibly going to make laptop action interesting to the reader?



The pair, together with a few other people, travel, overcoming some obstacles, to the leader of J's (which I'll call the woman here) cult. On the way R (the man) learns the codes for the world in an ancient sanctuary*. The leader of the cult sends J and R on a quest to the Source Tower, which contains the source code for the world, which R could modify, to save the world from the dark lord C (all the letters are less embarrassing than the actual names) who's also hacking the world.

Fantasy programming metaphors sound incredibly awful to read like this. I'm not saying you can't make it work, but, Jeez, it sounds painful in synopsis. Zindell's Neverness does mathematics as starship flight - have a look at that.


(*I'm almost to here in the first draft.)

Right after this plotdump, in a scuttle with some of C's goons, R gets knocked out, and awakes in a detention facility where he's been kept sedated as a dangerous criminal, with all of the previous story revealed as a dream. Unfortunately, he's not given much time to do anything with this revelation, sedated again, and sent back into the dream.

That's enough of that, I think. Some other elements worth mentioning: during the rest of the story R loses consciousness several more times, and during each period finds himself coming to in a different situation,

So the previous events had no impact? Without some kind of throughline it's just in excursion into some random crap you thought up.


such as where R is an artificial intelligence that scientists are testing in a simulated reality. In addition, the narrator is at least supposed to be an active force in the story, guiding, misleading, or just mocking R from time to time.

R needs to adjust and learn from your protag (one potential throughline avenue). Skip the clever narrator bits unless they really add something to your story or involve a character that shows up later. How is what the protag experiencing supposed to help the AI? Has his memory been stripped so his experiences are authentic? Is he, literally, a white hat hacking attempt to see what a black hat might do? If so - why is he amnesiac about his abilities and the situation? The meta-situation has to make sense for the story to follow - and having that, even in broad strokes - will give you ideas for what actually needs to occur.

That said, it was all a VR is the third laziest SF trope ever. If it's VR - how are you going to make the stakes interesting? What happens in a VR death and how will the protagonist know about it? is there something worse than death. What are the stakes and how do you get that across? There are structural similarities here with Farmer's World of the Tiers series (the first one in particular) (Tad Williams Otherland also, but Christ was that a slog). Have a read of that and see if that can help gain some kind of foothold in how you can make the stakes relevant to the reader and, more importantly, to yourself.


I reckon the wall of text is tall enough. Appreciate input on all accounts.

Martello
Apr 29, 2012

by XyloJW

Sitting Here
Dec 31, 2007
writing makes me feel like I have literal brain damage

pretty sure I'm going to wake up with a terrible hangover one morning and it will be revealed my "novel" was actually an amalgam of earwax and stolen office supplies all along

JSYK

Dr. Kloctopussy
Apr 22, 2003

"It's time....to DIE!"

Sitting Here posted:

writing makes me feel like I have literal brain damage

pretty sure I'm going to wake up with a terrible hangover one morning and it will be revealed my "novel" was actually an amalgam of earwax and stolen office supplies all along

JSYK

At least you'll have all those sweet free office supplies though.

supermikhail
Nov 17, 2012


"It's video games, Scully."
Video games?"
"He enlists the help of strangers to make his perfect video game. When he gets bored of an idea, he murders them and moves on to the next, learning nothing in the process."
"Hmm... interesting."
Well... the fact that it happened again maybe should make me face up to my actual attitudes to writing, that I've secretly hated it for a while now, have perhaps hated myself, and have certainly had from time to time to let out some steam in passive-aggressive barely held-back attacks on fellow human beings. Apologies for that. I guess I'll maybe see you in a year?

Sitting Here
Dec 31, 2007

supermikhail posted:

Well... the fact that it happened again maybe should make me face up to my actual attitudes to writing, that I've secretly hated it for a while now, have perhaps hated myself, and have certainly had from time to time to let out some steam in passive-aggressive barely held-back attacks on fellow human beings. Apologies for that. I guess I'll maybe see you in a year?

Everyone here is self conscious about themselves and their writing, when someone comes in and is honest about it it's like WHOA BUDDY we're trying to be all cool and aloof here. Which is what happened to you. My personal opinion is you shouldn't go away for a year, you should keep posting and maybe do some Thunderdome and continue getting feedback on yourself and your ideas.

Screaming Idiot
Nov 26, 2007

JUST POSTING WHILE JERKIN' MY GHERKIN SITTIN' IN A PERKINS!

BEATS SELLING MERKINS.

supermikhail posted:

Well... the fact that it happened again maybe should make me face up to my actual attitudes to writing, that I've secretly hated it for a while now, have perhaps hated myself, and have certainly had from time to time to let out some steam in passive-aggressive barely held-back attacks on fellow human beings. Apologies for that. I guess I'll maybe see you in a year?

JUUUUUUST

FUUUUUUUCKING

WRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITE

supermikhail
Nov 17, 2012


"It's video games, Scully."
Video games?"
"He enlists the help of strangers to make his perfect video game. When he gets bored of an idea, he murders them and moves on to the next, learning nothing in the process."
"Hmm... interesting."
Uh... I know you're going to be disappointed, but I just felt such a wave of relief (slightly frightened) from striking off another time-consuming (and frustrating) hobby off my schedule, so I really hope you don't mind terribly much if I relish it for at least a while. :shobon:

Of course, it's kind of early to make a definite pronouncement, and maybe I'll be overwhelmed by remorse later in the day, but tentatively I'm having a vacation.

Dr. Kloctopussy
Apr 22, 2003

"It's time....to DIE!"

supermikhail posted:

Uh... I know you're going to be disappointed, but I just felt such a wave of relief (slightly frightened) from striking off another time-consuming (and frustrating) hobby off my schedule, so I really hope you don't mind terribly much if I relish it for at least a while. :shobon:

Of course, it's kind of early to make a definite pronouncement, and maybe I'll be overwhelmed by remorse later in the day, but tentatively I'm having a vacation.

If you feel a sense of relief, then definitely drop it for a while.

edit: One time I dated a guy for 3 years and I went on a week-long vacation by myself and I felt such a wave of relief that I broke up with him a month later, true story. Best decision. Relief is a powerful emotion and you should pay attention to what it tells you.

edit 2: I think people often fetishize the idea that you must finish everything you start, and this attitude can be detrimental. If you get caught up in that feeling, you may start looking to other people to confirm that it is impossible for you to finish something. Or to build yourself up to make it feel like you are so great it will be easy. Whenever I don't want to do something, but can't quite admit it to myself, I try to make it out to be impossible, and when anyone gives me good suggestions for how to move forward, I argue with them endlessly. I suspect this may be what's behind your arguments with advice, too. What works for other people just won't work for you. When you finally let go of whatever you were trying to force yourself to do, it is such a good feeling. Having that burden gone.

Also, when I get so bogged down in something that working on it -- or more often thinking about working on it, because I can't bring myself to actually do it -- becomes miserable, I won't work on anything else either. I am too overwhelmed with guilt about not working on whatever I "need" to finish, that I can't bear to face it, but I also feel too guilty to work on something else when I "should" be working on the other thing. So I won't do anything for months. For example, I was making this dress, and right at the end, I accidentally made a cut way too deep in the neckline. So it is nearly done, but I don't know the best way to fix it, but... it's almost done! and I should finish it! ...I haven't finished it and I haven't sewn anything for almost a year now....I have had a lot of ideas for projects that I haven't started though!

I think a lot of people would suggest I just make myself do it for fucks sake, and don't get me wrong, completing most worthwhile things requires a lot of just doing something that is difficult or unenjoyable. Plus, it can be far too easy to convince yourself that something difficult or mildly uncomfortable or that you're not confident about just makes you miserable, when really it is tolerable and you are getting in your own way by building it up into something earth-shatteringly terrible. There are lots of "tricks" to changing this mindset. My favorites are 1) breaking things down into very discrete tasks that can be obviously completed, and 2) using a timer and only working for a short period of time. Overall, I think making yourself do things you hate through sheer force of will is over-emphasized as a solution pretty much everywhere. Forcing yourself to do something that genuinely makes you miserable can only go on for so long. And is that really what you want to do as a hobby?

If you want to do something more-or-less professionally, you are going to have to develop a higher "pain tolerance" for doing the hard parts, obviously. One of the biggest things you learn when "learning to write," in my opinion, is how to get yourself to write and to keep writing. There is a lot to learn from the process of finishing something you don't enjoy, but I think there is also a lot to learn from deciding when to move on. And of course, you will learn much more if you are doing anything instead of nothing. It's true that you can't learn how to end a story if you never finish one. I would even argue that you can't truly learn how to begin a story if you never finish one. And by one I mean more like a dozen or fifty or maybe a hundred, it really depends. But you're still going to learn more by starting and abandoning a hundred stories than doing nothing on no stories.

There's not really one true rule to guide anyone on what to finish and what to give up. Or what hobbies to keep and which to peacefully move away from. I think discovering how to make these decisions for yourself is one of the main parts of maturing -- as a writer, as a person, whatever. You have to sort out what the result really means to you (ignoring -- or not -- whatever relief from guilt and self-criticism you get from finishing), what the actual misery involved is (ignoring -- or not -- whether you are building it up to be more miserable than it really has to be), and deciding whether the result is worth the pain.

FULL DISCLOSURE: I DON'T HAVE A GREAT TRACK RECORD OF FINISHING THINGS AND AM TOTALLY JUSTIFYING MY OWN FAILURES.

(Also, I can't finish that dress because 1) my sewing table is covered in clothes that I have to fold first, and 2) my sewing machines are buried in boxes, and 3) I'm not sure where I left it, and 4) I'm not sure what the best way to fix it is, and 5) I'm not even sure if the machine I need even works any more, and 6) It's probably covered in cat hair by now anyway, and 7) ...)

Dr. Kloctopussy fucked around with this message at 08:02 on Apr 22, 2015

newtestleper
Oct 30, 2003
This is a pretty good thing about how we should feel good about quitting stuff.

http://freakonomics.com/2011/09/30/new-freakonomics-radio-podcast-the-upside-of-quitting/

Martello
Apr 29, 2012

by XyloJW
asks advice in fiction advice thread

people give advice

doesn't like advice given, is tremendously pompous about it

called out on bad attitude

announces will not be writing after all, is somehow more pompous about not-writing as about writing

The Saddest Rhino
Apr 29, 2009

Put it all together.
Solve the world.
One conversation at a time.



Much gratitude to the Internet bullies for discouraging me from writing forever. Your contribution is duly appreciated.

supermikhail
Nov 17, 2012


"It's video games, Scully."
Video games?"
"He enlists the help of strangers to make his perfect video game. When he gets bored of an idea, he murders them and moves on to the next, learning nothing in the process."
"Hmm... interesting."

newtestleper posted:

This is a pretty good thing about how we should feel good about quitting stuff.

http://freakonomics.com/2011/09/30/new-freakonomics-radio-podcast-the-upside-of-quitting/

This is indeed a very good podcast. Have you read the book, by any chance? I hope the slight deviation from the topic is okay. I mean, I'm quite sure the book contains some valuable information for a writer, going by the blurb.

The Saddest Rhino posted:

Much gratitude to the Internet bullies for discouraging me from writing forever. Your contribution is duly appreciated.

Don't know how much of this is sarcasm, but I'd like to emphasise that I feel that taking at least a long break is very much the right thing to do for me right now.


Well. I just want to acknowledge that I read it all. You know, much of that could be interpreted as a lot of empty blathering, and I hope guys here don't mistreat you over it. I personally agree on most points with you.

ravenkult
Feb 3, 2011


supermikhail posted:



Don't know how much of this is sarcasm, but I'd like to emphasise that I feel that taking at least a long break is very much the right thing to do for me right now.




A break from what?

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supermikhail
Nov 17, 2012


"It's video games, Scully."
Video games?"
"He enlists the help of strangers to make his perfect video game. When he gets bored of an idea, he murders them and moves on to the next, learning nothing in the process."
"Hmm... interesting."
I'm not sure what you mean. I guess since you're asking the question, "writing" wouldn't be the right answer. I'd say, from even considering writing like something I'm supposed to do, because that's obviously a big source of stress in itself. I'm also not going to miss word counts and time limits. If you had a different angle in mind, let me know, because your question can be interpreted in many different ways.

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