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Online (or a local jewelery district) is a much better deal for engagement rings than big box, especially for the diamonds e.g. http://www.whiteflash.com/
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Apr 30, 2015 03:19
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Shop around for jewelry. Jared's, Zales, etc. cost multiple times what a good local jeweler costs. I went ring shopping with my now fiancee. Her taste was not what I was expecting and we ended up significantly under budget because she'd rather spend that money on something else. I'm normally pretty grumpy about pretty rock prices but I could've easily fallen into the macho trap of spending more to impress others with carats, which is not what she wanted.
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Apr 30, 2015 09:50
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The Sock posted:I've been reading over this thread and still have a few questions, if you kind goons may be of assistance: 1. Buy a simple ring for the proposal and take her shopping to pick out what she wants. Problem solved. 2. Stay away from the Jared's, Kay's, Sterling Jewelers of the world. Go to a local jeweler and they will make you happier with a QUALITY and affordable ring. 3. Rings are easy to resize. If you go to a local jeweler often times they will size her the right way (see my answer to 1). 4. Only you know her family...I didn't ask my fiancé's father because they weren't super close, but the wedding has brought them together. You may not need to ask his permission, but remember that is still his little girl. 5. See my answer to question 1. Seriously...just get a very simple ring to propose with, and then make a day of it going out to a local jeweler to pick out a ring SHE likes and WANTS to wear every day. Who knows...maybe she won't want a diamond and will want a Ruby or Sapphire instead.
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Apr 30, 2015 13:43
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The only problem with a placeholder ring is that the first thing everyone wants to see after you get engaged is the ring. We ended up just shopping openly for it together. Well, she spent a lot of time on Pinterest, and then we visited a few stores in person. Good thing, since I was way off on what she wanted. Then I picked one that she liked in the store and bought it and got it resized without her involved, so there was still a little bit of surprise.
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Apr 30, 2015 15:25
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smackfu posted:The only problem with a placeholder ring is that the first thing everyone wants to see after you get engaged is the ring. Yea but if you are serious about getting engaged you can go get a ring the next day...or tell people to suck it while you wait for your custom, perfect ring to be made.
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Apr 30, 2015 19:50
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Telling other people to suck it is good practice for when you start planning your wedding.
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Apr 30, 2015 20:12
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I also suggest only trusting her opinion on the ring, unless it's a friend who can help look who knows her taste. I'm giving my ring to the jeweler who's doing our wedding bands next week so it can be reset in a setting that's more to my taste (as in not yellow gold and less blingy). It's a hassle but it's worth it because, as I told my fiance, it's something I'm [hopefully] going to wear for the rest of my life, I want to have something I absolutely love. Not that I don't love the ring he picked, I just wish he looked at my pinterest board or asked my best friend for input (since she knows I hate yellow gold and I only pinned white gold rings). Don't make the same mistake! Also I agree that telling other people to suck it will come in handy. Literally everyone has an opinion! I'm getting married in exactly 6 months (  ) and I have a couple small things left to do, like get my headpiece and bouquet off Etsy, and my coworker got mad when I said it was a long time and I didn't have anything left to do and that I was excited, sure, but I guess my excitement wasn't enough. I'll never understand people saying I'm doing it wrong, how rude.
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Apr 30, 2015 20:56
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BrainParasite posted:Telling other people to suck it is good practice for when you start planning your wedding. "When are you getting engaged?" Ok, we're engaged. "When are you getting married?" Ok, we're married. "When are you having kids?" Ok, we had a kid. "When are you having another kid?" Repeat until death.
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Apr 30, 2015 21:47
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smackfu posted:"When are you getting engaged?" What I hate are the people you've told when the date of the wedding is (for gently caress's sake you got a save the date), and they CONSTANTLY ask when the date is again. So. Annoying.
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May 1, 2015 14:00
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^^ My least favorite are people who, when you tell them your plans, they have to say "you know what would be better?" One of the attorneys in my office is like that, I avoid talking about plans at work because, apparently, literally everything I'm doing is wrong.
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May 1, 2015 22:36
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smackfu posted:"When are you getting engaged?" I got married almost a year ago now, and my mom has been telling me that people from my hometown have been asking when I'll have kids. I told her that until further notice, the only answer she should give is "Nine months after pregnancy, approximately".
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May 1, 2015 22:54
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My mother in law told me not to get too many wedding pictures printed so we had plenty of wall space for pictures of kids  When people tell you what you should do/not do for your wedding, there are two responses: 1) That sounds great, keep that in mind for your wedding; or 2) You already planned your wedding, let me plan mine. I think it's the most annoying from people who are recently married because they should know better, but it still happens.
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May 2, 2015 00:46
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Can anyone walk me through the name change process? I am in Oregon, if that helps. I thought that the way it works is I put the new name I want on the marriage license, but then when I went online to fill out the marriage license form it said the name I put down must match the name on my ID. Any advice would be appreciated, I don't want to screw this up.
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May 5, 2015 18:10
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remigious posted:Can anyone walk me through the name change process? I am in Oregon, if that helps. I thought that the way it works is I put the new name I want on the marriage license, but then when I went online to fill out the marriage license form it said the name I put down must match the name on my ID. Any advice would be appreciated, I don't want to screw this up. Most places are like this. There should be county forms for it and some wait time for it to be official.
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May 5, 2015 18:43
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smackfu posted:The only problem with a placeholder ring is that the first thing everyone wants to see after you get engaged is the ring. I'm late to this, but Pinterest was a life saver for me. We had already talked about getting married in general, and she had a board of rings and other wedding related items. I was able to sneak some time away to go visit a few places with her sister and just show the jewelers what she wanted, and one place pulled out a design that was almost exactly what was posted, so that worked out well. Also, my wedding is in 4 1/2 weeks. I want it to have happened at this point.
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May 5, 2015 18:47
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I'm getting married in a little over a month and I still have no gifts ordered. And thus, my question: My fiancee insists it's tradition for both of us to order gifts for the bridesmaids AND groomsmen. As in, both sets of people will get two sets of gifts, one from each of us, respectively. I had thought she was supposed to get gifts for my groomsmen and I for her bridesmaids, so I'm a little confused. If it's tradition to do it the way she wants it, fine, I'll shell out possibly $300 total for 12 people to get gifts, but if not, I think I'm still expected to do it at this point unless I want to fight about it.
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May 5, 2015 22:55
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That's interesting, i haven't heard of the gifts for the other side of the wedding party. I'm getting gifts for my groomsmen, my parents, and the ring bearer. She's getting gifts for her bridesmaids, her parents, and the flower girl.
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May 5, 2015 23:03
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Yeah, I had only heard of the groom buying groomsmen gifts, and the bride getting bridesmaid gifts. I don't know why you would buy gifts for the opposite, you don't know them nearly as well, in general.
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May 5, 2015 23:19
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22 Eargesplitten posted:Yeah, I had only heard of the groom buying groomsmen gifts, and the bride getting bridesmaid gifts. I don't know why you would buy gifts for the opposite, you don't know them nearly as well, in general. Welp I would have argued, but working 70 hours a week and still trying to plan a wedding kind of sucks the arguing right out of you. I actually thought THAT was the tradition, not getting them for your own wedding party, and especially not getting them for both wedding parties. Yeah I actually do know two of her bridesmaids decently well, but all I'm really ordering is wine glasses with their names on them and the wedding date. But yeah, it still seemed sort of weird to me to order gifts for her bridesmaids, like I'm saying, "Uh, thanks...? For being her bridesmaids or something?"
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May 5, 2015 23:31
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I live in NC and the marriage and name change stuff is done separate. You have to be married before you can change your name. So about a week after the wedding (when we returned from the honeymoon) I went to the Register of Deeds and got a copy of my Marriage certificate showing I am now married. Then I had to take the certificate along with my current Social security card and picture ID to the Social Security office and fill out the papers for the name change. They then mailed me my new Social Security card with my new name. Only then was I able to take my marriage cert, new SS card and current driver's license and go to the DMV to get my name on my Driver's license changed. THEN once I had my new driver's license I was finally able to change my name various other places like my Bank and Electricity accounts. Also seconding that I bought gifts for my own bridesmaids and he bought gifts for his groomsmen.
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May 6, 2015 01:07
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Buggiezor posted:I live in NC and the marriage and name change stuff is done separate. You have to be married before you can change your name. So about a week after the wedding (when we returned from the honeymoon) I went to the Register of Deeds and got a copy of my Marriage certificate showing I am now married. Then I had to take the certificate along with my current Social security card and picture ID to the Social Security office and fill out the papers for the name change. Huh. When I got married in NC(almost a decade ago), I just took the Marriage certificate and whatever temp. form the SS office gave me that day and went to get my driver's license immediately.
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May 6, 2015 01:27
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I lived in Texas when I got married but started the process with the official social security name change in Virginia. A few days post-wedding the courthouse will have the official paperwork (the officiant has to walk that down to the courthouse so depending on how organized they are it could be a few days) that you can pick up. Make sure you get several official copies with the raised seal. Take your official raised seal copy to the social security office (check their hours first because they have really dumb hours sometimes) and apply for a new social security card. They will give you a receipt thingy that you have put in a request for a name change. Then take your raised seal marriage certificate to the DMV and get yourself a new license. I brought my SS receipt but they only really cared about the marriage certificate, but ymmv with your particular DMV. I got a new temp drivers license on the spot with my new name. Then, once you have your new social security card and new license with your new name on it, go to your bank and change your name at your bank/credit cards/etc, get a new passport (the US Passport office requires you mail them a raised seal copy along with $110), go to HR at work and get your name changed there, etc. Then despair at just how many things have your name on it that you have to change.
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May 6, 2015 02:25
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Thanks for the name change advice, everyone! That all sounds like a total pain in the butt.
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May 6, 2015 02:56
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I feel better about my decision to be lazy and not change my name.
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May 6, 2015 23:09
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Howdy all! I'm shopping for an engagement ring and already got a good picture of the lucky lady's preferences. Is this a good place to ask about pricing? I found one I like at a highly rated local jewelry shop. The setting is white gold with .6 total weight of diamonds in the H, VSI range. Cost 1,500 The main stone is H, SI1 1.0 for 6,300. Online I'm finding prices from 4500 - 7000 for ideal cut stones with the same specs. I know they need to make a profit, but it seems like they should come down. Does 6,500 seem like a reasonable total price to ask for? Can I get better? e: the setting price seems very reasonable based on my search online. e2: woah I just learned a bit about certifications and this stone is GIA. I think he's asking a very reasonable number +- 10% Mathhole fucked around with this message at 22:32 on May 9, 2015 |
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May 9, 2015 22:04
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Without seeing the diamond there's no way to guess, but that price seems reasonable for something with that grade that is nicely cut. My price for a finely cut (Japanese style super-ideal) diamond would be in the same range. If you like the visual appearance then I think you'll be safe to buy it.
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May 10, 2015 03:52
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We decided to do a wedding website because we have a number of guests coming from overseas and interstate. Easiest way to let everyone know the logistics information as we organise it. We're looking at Appy Couple, are there any websites any of you have used before that you recommend?
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May 10, 2015 05:15
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EvilElmo posted:We're looking at Appy Couple, are there any websites any of you have used before that you recommend? We have an Appy Couple site and like it well enough. It was super easy to track/get rsvps for our engagement party, that's for sure. I'm not sure if I'd pay for one if I could do it over again, but I don't regret spending money because it did the job and looks nice. I'm not sure if I mentioned it here, but I decided to get my engagement ring reset after sleepless nights and possibly-awkward conversations and I got it back today and it's perfect and I love it and my fiancé is happy that I'm happy, now to just fret over if his family with notice that my ring is drastically different. Hopefully they didn't pay too much attention to the original ring to notice.
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May 10, 2015 06:28
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JohnnyRnR posted:Without seeing the diamond there's no way to guess, but that price seems reasonable for something with that grade that is nicely cut. My price for a finely cut (Japanese style super-ideal) diamond would be in the same range. Thanks for the wise words! I went for it and ended up getting him down to $4.5k because the GIA cert said the cut was merely 'good'. I looked at an 'excellent' next to my stone and couldn't see a huge difference in brilliance, so I skimped a little. Total cost with setting ended up at $6000, and then tax put me just below 6,500, so I feel good! And she's going to love it!
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May 11, 2015 06:02
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Mathhole posted:Thanks for the wise words! That's about what I spent on my fiancee's engagement ring. The whole time I was looking I had her parents in my ear trying to tell me what to buy and bigger is better and quality is less important, so I mostly ignored them except for the setting and ring type she wanted, and did a compromise with the size and quality and what I had to spend. Anyhow, she will love it like you said. I was nervous as gently caress about whether my fiancee would like hers or not, but after I proposed she was immediately on the phone with her parents and taking photos of it and sending them to everyone she knew.
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May 11, 2015 21:40
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Mathhole posted:Thanks for the wise words! You paid tax? You went about it all wrong. Everyone knows the only way to purchase diamonds is through handing envelopes of cash to middlemen.
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May 11, 2015 22:22
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Reality check: what the gently caress do you do with a bridesmaid dress when the wedding is over? I sure as poo poo am not wearing this David's purple polyester garbage ever again. I presume that selling it is impossible? So, what, donate it to goodwill? Or keep it in the back of my closet until my body returns to the loam and it still has failed to decay because it's loving polyester have I mentioned this dress is garbage and I hate it?
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May 14, 2015 05:47
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Nicol Bolas posted:Reality check: what the gently caress do you do with a bridesmaid dress when the wedding is over? I sure as poo poo am not wearing this David's purple polyester garbage ever again. I presume that selling it is impossible? So, what, donate it to goodwill? Or keep it in the back of my closet until my body returns to the loam and it still has failed to decay because it's loving polyester have I mentioned this dress is garbage and I hate it? Keep them forever, but promise your boyfriend/fiance/husband/husband's ghost that some day you're taking them to Goodwill. Then complain you have no closet space.
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May 14, 2015 05:53
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If it's David's and you didn't alter it, you could totally sell it! I've bought a ton of bridesmaids dresses that way.
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May 14, 2015 12:12
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Eris posted:If it's David's and you didn't alter it, you could totally sell it! I've bought a ton of bridesmaids dresses that way. Wait, this is awesome. Where can I buy this crap used? Unfortunately, I'm definitely going to have to alter or pin or sonething, as it's a floor-length gown and I'm all of 5'2", but if I buy it used I don't have to give $200 to loving David's. I also have 3 colors and 2 styles to pick from so I imagine that increases my chances of finding it, right?
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May 14, 2015 14:04
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Another option for what to do with it after the wedding is donating it for use as a prom or w/e dress. You'd have to research whether or not your city has that kind of program, plus you'd be forfeiting the money spent on a bridesmaid dress. I gave mine to a 13 year old girl who loved it even though it was an atrocious bright red full length dress. 
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May 14, 2015 15:36
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Justadae posted:Another option for what to do with it after the wedding is donating it for use as a prom or w/e dress. You'd have to research whether or not your city has that kind of program, plus you'd be forfeiting the money spent on a bridesmaid dress. I gave mine to a 13 year old girl who loved it even though it was an atrocious bright red full length dress. The moment you buy a bridesmaid dress you are forfeiting the money. Even the bridesmaids in my wedding aren't going to wear the dresses and they are a simple grey dress in whatever style (of 5) they like.
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May 14, 2015 18:34
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I'm happy to donate it or craft it or whatever after if selling is not realistic, but if anyone has suggestions for buying a used dress, I'm all ears. Upside: major manufacturer, David's bridal. Downside: one of two designs, one of three colors.
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May 16, 2015 08:41
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Check eBay! Or once wed or weddingbee or whatever. You can just google the style, color and size and I almost guarantee you'll find others selling theirs.
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May 16, 2015 13:16
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Nicol Bolas posted:I'm happy to donate it or craft it or whatever after if selling is not realistic, but if anyone has suggestions for buying a used dress, I'm all ears. Upside: major manufacturer, David's bridal. Downside: one of two designs, one of three colors. There are sites that rent the dress...its like $75 and you rent it for the wedding and mail it back.
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May 16, 2015 14:08
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