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haljordan posted:The fact that anyone would feel the need to win an argument with a man known as Jeff the Drunk is the funniest part of that for me. And yet Eric still couldn't understand that he belonged in the Wack Pack. No self awareness, that one.
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Jun 6, 2015 00:00
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TASTE THE PAIN!! posted:And yet Eric still couldn't understand that he belonged in the Wack Pack. No self awareness, that one. I remember a bit where someone came up with a checklist of different requirements to be a Wack Packer and assigned point values to each. Eric the Midget had the highest score by far, I think. I'll see if I can find it on YouTube.
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Jun 6, 2015 00:04
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haljordan posted:I remember a bit where someone came up with a checklist of different requirements to be a Wack Packer and assigned point values to each. Eric the Midget had the highest score by far, I think. I'll see if I can find it on YouTube. Yeah, that's great. Beet was like 2-3 points away from that, Hank was up there, too. People like Marianne barely qualified. "Did Howard assign a specific name to you?" "Does your known title have a 'the' in it?" "Do you regularly call in to the show?" (ETM: Yeah, but so does Gilbert Gottfriend!!!)
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Jun 6, 2015 00:10
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Are you on SSI, do you have a job, etc etc. I think Eric was on the phone when that guy called in too.
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Jun 6, 2015 00:27
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I bought a Sonos system tonight. I can't stop saying "Sonos, Bawf" https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=12&v=VS7yS4MAAik
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Jun 6, 2015 00:42
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haljordan posted:I like how High Pitch just used the same stupid voice for the ten different women he impersonated while on the phone with Eric. I KNOW ITS YOUUUUUUU, I CAN TELL THE VOICE
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Jun 6, 2015 00:48
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GenoCanSing posted:I KNOW ITS YOUUUUUUU, I CAN TELL THE VOICE You mean this isn't Dick Buffman?
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Jun 6, 2015 00:53
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This is sort of old news, but since Eric's the current topic, add TNA wrestling to the list of things he's gotten cancelled.
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Jun 6, 2015 01:20
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TASTE THE PAIN!! posted:This is sort of old news, but since Eric's the current topic, add TNA wrestling to the list of things he's gotten cancelled. The hosed up thing is that Eric the Midget might've actually been one of the least dumbest mistakes TNA made. It's like if Gary the Retard got to run a wrestling fed. edit: Yessss here it is https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TDeZXyKjuCM https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=20-RgFU3od0 haljordan fucked around with this message at 01:28 on Jun 6, 2015 |
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Jun 6, 2015 01:25
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The only thing on the checklist that didn't apply to Eric was about making GBS threads his pants(and even then who knows). I love how he couldn't understand that it was a qualifying list and that simply saying yes for 1-2 things didn't make someone a Wack Packer. If you were ever going to create a Wack Packer Eric is pretty drat close to your scientific ideal.
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Jun 6, 2015 01:59
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TASTE THE PAIN!! posted:gently caress YOU ARTIE YOU BIG UGLY BEACHED WHALE BASTARD. YOUR FAT rear end HAS NEVER BEEN IN A GOOD MOVIE. Hi Fred Riosan posted:You mean this isn't Dick Buffman? Howard "Meanwhile Gilbert would take this job in 2 seconds"
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Jun 6, 2015 02:14
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Rupert Buttermilk posted:This reminds me of something I listened to recently, where Eric was defending himself against Jeff, about how he can tell voices apart. Jeff said that was bullshit, rightly so, and Eric replied with how many times he called Richard out for his impersonations. Jeff hit back with "Oh, wow, you can tell that Richard isn't a woman." I have to hear this. Jeff the Drunk vs. anyone is always hilarious.
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Jun 6, 2015 02:17
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Caper posted:I have to hear this. Jeff the Drunk vs. anyone is always hilarious. It's part of ETM's 2010 clip pack, or his 2011. There are two playlists on youtube so it might be easier to find it there. The whole thing is near the end of the year, so Oct-Dec, but I really can't remember which year it was. EDIT: I would start with 2011, I really think that's when it was.
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Jun 6, 2015 02:34
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I think that is the same argument where Gary and Artie state they would rather be Eric than Jeff because at least Eric has an excuse for sucking so bad. Eventually they convince Howard and Jeff is just like "jeez, thanks guys"
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Jun 6, 2015 02:47
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TheJoker138 posted:Again, I'm sure it has it's uses, but not for any of the poo poo Robin was talking about it doing. Robin has done so much wacky poo poo she completely forgot she put magnet behind her ears.
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Jun 6, 2015 02:49
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"I'd rather be depressed and good looking than, you know" - Howard Stern, visitor of a shrink 3-4 times a week for the past 20 years.
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Jun 6, 2015 03:37
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I must see those udders! Those chocolatey udders!
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Jun 6, 2015 05:18
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I'm surprised Eric never made any sort of comment, that I can remember, about Robin's tits. He was obsessed with huge boobs, and spoke to her so regularly, you'd think it would have come up.
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Jun 6, 2015 12:01
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One of my faaaavvvoooriittee Eric moments was when he refused to go an event because Johnny Fratto lied about Brandy Talore being there. "Eric, I'm fuckin tellin ya, deres gonna be a hunred girls dere named Brandy and dey all got titties" I just googled her, she's vile! she has a forehead like Herman Munster
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Jun 6, 2015 12:20
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DeadBonesBrook posted:One of my faaaavvvoooriittee Eric moments was when he refused to go an event because Johnny Fratto lied about Brandy Talore being there. How about when he charged Fratto eight grand because Johnny was dumb enough to send him to a wrestling show?
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Jun 6, 2015 13:33
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Jeff got in a good line when he and Eric did the inside the actors studio questions What sound do you love? Eric: The sound of the A's winning Jeff: The sound of a beer opening What sound do you hate? Jeff: The sound of the A's winning I remember once Eric wanted the listeners to invest and buy TNA wrestling so he could own it and run it. Imagine Eric running a wrestling company. I mean, the whole way wrestling works is big dramatic storylines where the bad guys sometimes win and sometimes hold the title. You can't have wrestling where the favorite guy is always champion and always wins, it doesn't work that way. Eric deep down I don't think he really believed wrestling was fake and pre-scripted. Even when it was said to his face he didn't believe it. He didn't want to, like a 90 IQ cult member. Eric would have taken the company and fired all the wrestlers he doesn't like right away and then almost immediately be sued by the hot wrestling chicks because he made contracts that said they have to live with him for 5 years.
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Jun 6, 2015 13:46
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Again, most people in this thread probably aren't big wrestling fans, but trust me, it is almost impossible for Eric to have done worse with TNA than Dixie Carter (who is currently running poo poo right into the ground).
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Jun 6, 2015 13:54
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haljordan posted:How about when he charged Fratto eight grand because Johnny was dumb enough to send him to a wrestling show? The invoice he sent was amazing. They rented a PT Cruiser and one charge was "Blue - 50 dollars a day extra." Also, 35 dollars an hour x 72 hours (the entire time he was there, including sleeping). For nothing, he didn't even do anything to help the JFSC! He finally admitted he padded the bill
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Jun 6, 2015 14:02
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Ribsauce posted:The invoice he sent was amazing. They rented a PT Cruiser and one charge was "Blue - 50 dollars a day extra." Also, 35 dollars an hour x 72 hours (the entire time he was there, including sleeping). For nothing, he didn't even do anything to help the JFSC! Haha yeah he said the rental car was like eight hundred bucks altogether.
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Jun 6, 2015 14:05
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Rupert Buttermilk posted:Yeah, that's great. Beet was like 2-3 points away from that, Hank was up there, too. People like Marianne barely qualified. 04-28-2010. Just listened to it this morning.
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Jun 6, 2015 14:39
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Ribsauce posted:He finally admitted he padded the bill I love when Eric 'admits' something with a sheepish '....maybe'. I wonder who it was who gave Eric the idea to pad the bill in such a ridiculous way.
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Jun 6, 2015 14:39
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GenoCanSing posted:I love when Eric 'admits' something with a sheepish '....maybe'. I'm going to ruin everyones fun and say Johnny Fratto.
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Jun 6, 2015 14:51
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One of the most underrated Eric calls of all time https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-8UNUC5Rwsw
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Jun 6, 2015 15:27
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One Eric the Midget call I can't find was when he called in, and the crew kept pretending they couldn't hear him. I can't remember what happened with the rest of the call (probably nothing hah), but it went on for like 2 minutes and finally Howard did a 10 second countdown and at 1 second they decided they could hear them. Also on my favorite subject in the world (ETM), some business magazine in a waiting room had an article on charisma and it said one thing people do to show a lot of charisma is pause for emphasis between words in the middle of sentences. All I could think was even Bill Clinton can't fade ETM on when it comes to that! ETM was on some next level charisma poo poo, he took it to pausing in the middle of words!
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Jun 6, 2015 15:31
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haljordan posted:Again, most people in this thread probably aren't big wrestling fans, but trust me, it is almost impossible for Eric to have done worse with TNA than Dixie Carter (who is currently running poo poo right into the ground). Yeah, the most that would have been different is maybe guys like AJ Styles and Samoa Joe would have left sooner and it would have died slightly quicker.
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Jun 6, 2015 16:36
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Ribsauce posted:One Eric the Midget call I can't find was when he called in, and the crew kept pretending they couldn't hear him. I can't remember what happened with the rest of the call (probably nothing hah), but it went on for like 2 minutes and finally Howard did a 10 second countdown and at 1 second they decided they could hear them. I'm pretty sure that this clip is available in one of the script cover clip packs. And oh god, is it good.
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Jun 6, 2015 16:58
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Ribsauce posted:One Eric the Midget call I can't find was when he called in, and the crew kept pretending they couldn't hear him. I can't remember what happened with the rest of the call (probably nothing hah), but it went on for like 2 minutes and finally Howard did a 10 second countdown and at 1 second they decided they could hear them. 2008-08-19 Loving this total ETM pack. and Youtube for you all: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M87ZSMi5MvU
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Jun 6, 2015 17:03
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TASTE THE PAIN!! posted:One of the most underrated Eric calls of all time Eric's voice is so loving weird that even when its just him talking it sounds like cut up sound bytes that Richard and Sal. A malformed bizarre dwarf is calling to demand that a grammy winning country superstar allow him to anally rape her because she implied that perhaps two prostitutes weren't in love with said malformed bizarre dwarf. You couldn't come up with poo poo like this if you tried.
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Jun 6, 2015 18:09
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You know, I try to imagine what Eric would be like if he wasn't a midget and didn't have Ehlors-Danlos syndrome (or whatever it's called), and I really can't. I can picture what he'd look like, but that's it. I mean, despite the fact that he was 39 when he died, he really did just come across as an angry kid/teen. The horrible ideas (Charlie's Angels, Douggie the Puggy, Modeling Agency of contractually trapped women, etc...) , the need for attention ("I wa... as just call... ing to tell you about my... ") , the awesomely terrible web shows on the JFSC after American Idol and AGT... It all looks as if some 16-17 year old dork was behind it all.
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Jun 6, 2015 18:35
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Rupert Buttermilk posted:I can picture what he'd look like, but that's it. GenoCanSing posted:Tell me this isn't exactly how ETM would look if he was normal size and old
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Jun 6, 2015 19:58
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Rupert Buttermilk posted:You know, I try to imagine what Eric would be like if he wasn't a midget and didn't have Ehlors-Danlos syndrome (or whatever it's called), and I really can't. I can picture what he'd look like, but that's it. He'd probably just be another Jeff the Drunk. Same entitled useless crybaby shithead but in a normal sized body.
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Jun 6, 2015 20:39
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I'd give him the benefit of a doubt and say he'd be fairly normal. His entitlement comes from the way he was raised with his handicap. I'm not really putting down his parents as I'm sure they only wanted to do what they thought was best for him and made sure he had as good of a life as he could but by doing so they coddled him at every stop and he only seemed to gain some shred of independence at the very end of his life, well past the point of doing any developmental good. He had the personality of an 11 year old because he never developed past it. He likes any hint of power you give him, he loves the fantasy world of wrestling, he loves the porno ideal of a woman, just everything about him is no different than any middle school-aged kid. For a 39 year old he was a poo poo but for an 11-12 year old he was typical, if not a bit spoiled. I think if his parents had more more of an effort to tell him to learn to do things on his own more(relative to his disability of course) he probably wouldn't have turned out nearly as bad but that's some real 20/20 hindsight stuff.
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Jun 6, 2015 21:02
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I wouldn't even say his disability is to blame. A lot of Wack Packers, even recently like Hanzi, have this attitude that if Howard had all these nice houses and hundreds of millions, that if he would give them a tiny fraction of what he's capable of, their lives would be forever changed. It's like if you were struggling with rent every month and you suddenly starting getting a personal audience with Bill Gates twice a week. How long could you hold out before you started subtly begging? Eric didn't even want anything other than to talk about American Idol when he was first calling, as though he were on any basic cable public access show. Then they threw $500 at him a few times and he realized what a gold mine the show could be for him. Then after a while the Wack Packers, possibly with prompting from the internet, start to see themselves as "content creators" worthy of salaries and before you know it Riley Martin is asking for five million a year.
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Jun 6, 2015 21:20
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His personality exceeded the money. He was notorious for turning down things that could have made him thousands of dollars. There's a big difference between Hank, Eric, and Beet which are the 3 basic types of Wack Packers. Hank didn't beg and was by all accounts a normal guy. Beet simply doesn't know any better. Eric was merely put in a circumstance where the coddling he received was perpetuated and allowed his ego to grow. Hank didn't think Howard owed him something just for being a Wack Packer and he set his own path to take advantage of the notoriety he received on the show(he had a large amount of CC debt he was thrilled to have paid off thanks to appearances from the show) while Eric simply realized if he annoyed people enough they'd probably do something for him and if not then gently caress them. All being on the show did was magnify his dickish, demanding personality, it didn't create it.
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Jun 6, 2015 21:38
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Eric would probably look a bit like his brother:
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Jun 6, 2015 21:54
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