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Kekekela
Oct 28, 2004

Bubba Smith posted:

Hey gang, haven't had enough of that Ken Shamrock photo yet? Then please listen to the end of the Bellator 138 conference call when Kimbo Slice is asked about that photo and PEDs in general and right as he's about to be honest the conference call conveniently ends.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tNc9o87k960&t=2184s

"No you can't loving do this kind of poo poo if you're on the average level. Fans wanna see us perform! -Alright ladies and gentlemen thank you very much for tuning in to the Unfinished Business media call"
haha subtle.

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Shumagorath
Jun 6, 2001
It's true though. Without PEDs we're going to see a lot more of the Two Man Gas Out and it won't just be heavyweights.

willie_dee
Jun 21, 2010
I obtain sexual gratification from observing people being inflicted with violent head injuries

Wise Learned Man
Apr 22, 2008

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Lipstick Apathy

I take it JT is on gear?

I am Otis
Sep 22, 2003

Wise Learned Man posted:

I take it JT is on gear?

you don't have to answer that, willie.

James has a clean heart, that's all that matters

Fentry
Mar 7, 2003



http://mmajunkie.com/2015/06/james-thompson-injured-dan-charles-steps-in-vs-bobby-lashley-at-bellator-138

Interesting timing

Alastor_the_Stylish
Jul 25, 2006

WILL AMOUNT TO NOTHING IN LIFE.

Ogantai posted:

Ken's an undianabol inspiration. All you have to do is eat clen, tren hard, anavar give up.

I can't stanozolol your puns.

You're really a masteron this topic. I mean those are some choice, primobolan puns.

We'll see if Ken's body fell apart or if he's durabolin the fight. Then we'll find out if he can really take those big shots while keeping his composure and equipoise.

Marching Powder
Mar 8, 2008



stop the fucking fight, cornerman, your dude is fucking done and is about to be killed.

Alastor_the_Stylish posted:

I can't stanozolol your puns.

You're really a masteron this topic. I mean those are some choice, primobolan puns.

We'll see if Ken's body fell apart or if he's durabolin the fight. Then we'll find out if he can really take those big shots while keeping his composure and equipoise.

Well now we've driven this into the ground we can go back to being sad that JT is out

CommonShore
Jun 6, 2014

A true renaissance man


Will we really be seeing more gasout fights? Don't some PEDs impede your cardio?

Hmm now that I think about it, what Mark Kerr described happening to him - gassing from using too many roids - seems a lot like what happened to Carwin vs Lesnar...

Sweaty IT Nerd
Jul 13, 2007

CommonShore posted:

Will we really be seeing more gasout fights? Don't some PEDs impede your cardio?

Hmm now that I think about it, what Mark Kerr described happening to him - gassing from using too many roids - seems a lot like what happened to Carwin vs Lesnar...

You have to be careful because not all PEDs are roids. EPO is the first one that comes to mind. I don't think Lance was trying to get yoked.

CommonShore
Jun 6, 2014

A true renaissance man


The Sphinxster posted:

You have to be careful because not all PEDs are roids. EPO is the first one that comes to mind. I don't think Lance was trying to get yoked.

Yeah, I realize that. But do you think that your average B-level meathead who calls himself The Rhino and calls anyone who won't trade chin hooks with him a coward is taking EPO for cardio, or is he going out and shooting moose hormones into his rear end to get more power so that he gets more KOs for zombieprophet to gif and tweet?

If all of the PEDs go away, we'll probably see gassier fights at high level, and less gassy fights at lower levels.

Sweaty IT Nerd
Jul 13, 2007

I just learned that people think if they do cardio on cycles they run the risk of getting swole ticker disease. This explains quite a bit about b league (and every other league) fighters.

Shumagorath
Jun 6, 2001

CommonShore posted:

Will we really be seeing more gasout fights? Don't some PEDs impede your cardio?

Hmm now that I think about it, what Mark Kerr described happening to him - gassing from using too many roids - seems a lot like what happened to Carwin vs Lesnar...
Anabolic steroids don't automatically make you gain lean muscle mass; you have to do the same work to stimulate muscle growth. What steroids do is make the recovery much, much easier so you can train twice per day six days per week and not have one of your legs fall off in the middle of training camp. Cardio and MMA training tend toward breaking the body down and steroids offset that significantly, allowing an athlete to keep a high intensity strength program running on the side instead of soaking in a tub for hours on end because everything hurts.

If out-of-competition testing is going to be random and thorough, everyone will have to reduce the intensity of their training camps and we'll probably see a few things:

-More injuries
-Fewer fights per year
-Fighters losing lean muscle mass
-Slower pace fights
-Earlier retirement

I want to say fighters will have to stay closer to their competition shape year-round without putting on 20lbs of Mandarin between camps but that's unlikely.

Shumagorath fucked around with this message at 04:18 on Jun 11, 2015

1st AD
Dec 3, 2004

Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu: sometimes passing just isn't an option.

The Sphinxster posted:

I just learned that people think if they do cardio on cycles they run the risk of getting swole ticker disease. This explains quite a bit about b league (and every other league) fighters.

Isn't that exactly why Eddie Guerrero croaked?

kimbo305
Jun 9, 2007

actually, yeah, I am a little mad

Shumagorath posted:

Anabolic steroids don't automatically make you gain lean muscle mass; you have to do the same work to stimulate muscle growth.
This old study is about straight test and not anabolic steroids:
http://www.nejm.org/doi/full/10.1056/NEJM199607043350101?viewType=Print&viewClass=Print&

But: "Among the men in the no-exercise groups, those given testosterone had greater increases than those given placebo in muscle size in their arms (mean [±SE] change in triceps area, 424±104 vs. -81±109 mm2; P<0.05) and legs (change in quadriceps area, 607±123 vs. -131±111 mm2; P<0.05) and greater increases in strength in the bench-press (9±4 vs. -1±1 kg, P<0.05) and squatting exercises (16±4 vs. 3±1 kg, P<0.05)"

The guys on test didn't have to do anything to get a boost. Of course, the ones who also exercised got a more dramatic improvement.

willie_dee
Jun 21, 2010
I obtain sexual gratification from observing people being inflicted with violent head injuries

Wise Learned Man posted:

I take it JT is on gear?

Don't be loving daft now mate. He said a long time ago in an interview he dabbled when he was body building before he knew what mma was but he wouldn't of been able to fight at the level he does whilst on gear because top mma organisations test.

Triticum Guzzler
Jun 16, 2002

This study is old but it's very well done and is used constantly for teaching in sports and nutrition degrees. There's usually only a very small difference in the chemical structure of testosterone and anabolic steroids (which is obvious because it has to bind to the same receptors) but those small chemical changes can account for huge differences in metabolism, some being less effective than testosterone and some being much, much more effective. But they're basically all working via the same mechanism of action until you get into the big boy drugs like SARMs with longass alpha-numeric code names that only suicidal bodybuilders dare to touch.

Big Bidness
Aug 2, 2004

Triticum Guzzler posted:

This study is old but it's very well done and is used constantly for teaching in sports and nutrition degrees. There's usually only a very small difference in the chemical structure of testosterone and anabolic steroids (which is obvious because it has to bind to the same receptors) but those small chemical changes can account for huge differences in metabolism, some being less effective than testosterone and some being much, much more effective. But they're basically all working via the same mechanism of action until you get into the big boy drugs like SARMs with longass alpha-numeric code names that only suicidal bodybuilders dare to touch.

I wonder what the chart for high level PED use looks like nowadays. Obviously mentally ill bodybuilders are and will always be at the top since they're not concerned with being tested or dying, but I wonder how the recent scandals and increases in testing have changed things if at all.

individual865
Mar 26, 2007

Life on the outside ain't what it used to be.
Hahaha, this Bollywood remake of Warrior looks amaaaaazing! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wQO8LZ1Vh74

Shumagorath
Jun 6, 2001

Triticum Guzzler posted:

But they're basically all working via the same mechanism of action until you get into the big boy drugs like SARMs with longass alpha-numeric code names that only suicidal bodybuilders dare to touch.
Can't wait until something makes it out of trials :swoon:

colonel_korn
May 16, 2003

Kimbo Slice posted:

"I just hope they fuckin' pad his hands up, so he don't cut himself, and they keep all sharp objects away from him this time," Slice said. "Like what is he gonna do next time, gonna shoot himself in the foot? I don't know what Ken's gonna do man, I just hope he fights and takes this fight. Dude, you do poo poo like that when you're scared, when you're afraid, as close as it comes to committing suicide."

According to Frank Shamrock -- Ken Shamrock's brother -- the UFC veteran evaded the original fight with Slice because he intentionally cut himself in the lead up to the fight. Kimbo says if his opponent attempts to pull out of the fight, he'll charge into the locker room and initiate a bare-knuckle brawl:

"I hope he don't pussy out, cause if he doesn't bring it, I'm taking it to the dressing room and we just gonna do an old-fashioned bare-knuckle (fight) right there, right then and there in St. Louis. gently caress it."
This is going to be such a hilarious trainwreck. If it actually happens of course.

CRISPYBABY
Dec 15, 2007

by Reene
Kimbo vs. [eventually not] Shamrock was the first MMA card I ever watched live. Seems quaint looking back on it, but when you're a dumbass teenager raised on watching terrible streetfights on lovely pre-youtube video clip websites Kimbo had some serious appeal.

colonel_korn
May 16, 2003

Invicta finally found their next Cyborg victim and also finalized the rest of the card: http://invictafc.com/invicta-fc-13-official-for-las-vegas-on-july-9

quote:

The full seven-fight card for Invicta FC 13 can be found below:

Featherweight Title: Cristiane “Cyborg” Justino (13-1, 1 NC) vs. Faith Van Duin (5-1)
Bantamweight Title: Tonya Evinger (15-5) vs. Irene Aldana (5-1)
Atomweight Title: Herica Tiburcio (9-2) vs. Ayaka Hamasaki (11-1)
Bantamweight: Pannie Kianzad (7-0) vs. Jessica-Rose Clark (5-1)
Atomweight: Amber Brown (4-1) vs. Catherine Costigan (5-0)
Strawweight: Amy Montenegro (6-1) vs. Jamie Moyle (2-0)
Featherweight: Marina Shafir (1-1) vs. Amber Leibrock (0-0)

Van Duin did that cool choke on the last Invicta card but aside from that I don't know anything about her. The other two title fights should be good I think, though if Aldana wins I dunno how long she'll reign as champ before just going to the UFC along with Grasso. I can't think of many at W135 in the UFC whose hands look this good.

TheCool69
Sep 23, 2011

attackmole posted:

Kimbo vs. [eventually not] Shamrock was the first MMA card I ever watched live. Seems quaint looking back on it, but when you're a dumbass teenager raised on watching terrible streetfights on lovely pre-youtube video clip websites Kimbo had some serious appeal.

No need to be shamed for being a Kimbo mark. We all have been there somepoint in our life

Bluedeanie
Jul 20, 2008

It's no longer a blue world, Max. Where could we go?



Interesting they put Shafir opening a card Cyborg is closing. It's surely a coincidence, but I could see them talking up a Rousey Cyborg fight nonstop during those two bouts.

coconono
Aug 11, 2004

KISS ME KRIS

individual865 posted:

Hahaha, this Bollywood remake of Warrior looks amaaaaazing! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wQO8LZ1Vh74

not enough singing and dancing numbers.

Fentry
Mar 7, 2003



Kimbo and Ken are now both publicly advocating PED use for MMA

http://www.mixedmartialarts.com/news/452522/Kimbo-Shamrock-make-case-for-PED-use/

Keepin it classy Bellator

Captain Log
Oct 2, 2006

Captain Log posted:

"I AINT DYING! Choo choo motherfucker!"
:toot::birddrugs::toot:

I mean this - Kimbo came off pretty well in his season of TUF.

My dad tuned in to hate him and ended up thinking he was the nicest guy on the show. Also, "The InnerMe!"

Dave Grool
Oct 21, 2008



Grimey Drawer
War Machine update: still crazy

quote:

"This is the way of an adulterous woman: she eats and wipes her mouth, and says, 'I have done no wickedness.'" Proverbs 30:20

So… I lost my composure a little bit at court the other day, it kind of makes me feel guilty, like I failed a test or something. I didn't yell or curse or have an old-school war machine spaz moment, but still, I guess I should have just kept my mouth shut. This is so hard though. Some of the stuff I really didn't do, and the worst part is that they KNOW it, they literally have ZERO regard for the truth. I want to take a polygraph test. The detective wants me to take a polygraph test. Yeah, it's not admissible in court, but they use them all the time to clear suspects of particular charges. Especially with regard to the attempted murders and burglary, they're intent based crimes, only me and God know my intent. A polygraph is the only way to get a glimpse into my head. Years ago in Cali a detective and DA wanted me to submit to a polygraph, guess what they said when I refused, "why not, what are you hiding?" But, of course, when I want to take one they won't let me! LOL… Wow. Why is it that the authorities only want to know the truth if it's going to benefit their OWN case? The system is so corrupt. What I did was bad enough, it'll send me to prison for long enough, why must they punish me for stuff I didn't do on top of it all, that's "justice"? This is lame, they hardly even have enough evidence (if we're being honest, with some of the charges they don't have enough) to bind me over to face trial on some of these charges, how do they expect to get a conviction where the burden of proof is exponentially greater? Why is it that the detective, a seasoned veteran, looked at the crime scene and interviewed the witnesses and only chose to charge me with six charges, but then the DA goes ahead and adds 28 more!? Is the detective retarded? Or is the DA an overzealous maniac? The state is going to waste all this money, make all this noise, and I'm only going to be found guilty of the stuff that I really did, the stuff that I would confess to and sign a deal for right now. The DA is going to look like an overzealous moron and Christy is going to look like a big, fat, vindictive liar for accusing me of "rape". I was "raping" my porn star girlfriend during our relationship and she never reported it, still wanted to marry me, and only made accusations AFTER I beat her and her lover? If that doesn't have R-E-V-E-N-G-E written all over it then I don't know what does. Juries are that stupid guys. High Desert State Prison, War Machine 1131480

Shumagorath
Jun 6, 2001
He should demand a trial by combat.

coconono
Aug 11, 2004

KISS ME KRIS

Lost For Words posted:

War Machine update: still crazy

user/post hyper combo.

Goddamn, I feel so dumb for giving that guy the benefit of the doubt.

colonel_korn
May 16, 2003

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2LDiYjR4V0Y

haha

Shumagorath
Jun 6, 2001
holy poo poo I think I still get Spike TV.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

Shumagorath posted:

He should demand a trial by combat.

Still a good chance he'd lose.

kensei
Dec 27, 2007

He has come home, where he belongs. The Ancient Mariner returns to lead his first team to glory, forever and ever. Amen!


Captain Log posted:

I mean this - Kimbo came off pretty well in his season of TUF.

My dad tuned in to hate him and ended up thinking he was the nicest guy on the show. Also, "The InnerMe!"

"The enemy is the inner knee" is still one of the best GDT titles.

red19fire
May 26, 2010

CommonShore posted:

Will we really be seeing more gasout fights? Don't some PEDs impede your cardio?

Hmm now that I think about it, what Mark Kerr described happening to him - gassing from using too many roids - seems a lot like what happened to Carwin vs Lesnar...

The Sphinxster posted:

You have to be careful because not all PEDs are roids. EPO is the first one that comes to mind. I don't think Lance was trying to get yoked.

The important thing is to tailor your chemical cocktail to your training. Different types of training and different PED's react differently.

Yeah, when Hendo was on TRT, he said when he took more than he was supposed to he could hit harder but his gas tank went to poo poo, so he tried to stay around the recommended 4:1 ratio. It's like the Vitor school of PED's, develop a ton of muscle/power via PED's, but you have to win early because moving around all that muscle mass will deplete your energy systems fast.

The other is to use more recovery-oriented PED's, such as EPO and hyperbaric chambers, etc, to recover faster from training so as to get more training in. Then you can cycle off before the fight while still retaining enough muscle memory and enough volume of training to do well in the fight. Almost like cramming before an exam. TRT will also have the same effect but to a lesser degree of a dedicated drug, it mainly enhances whatever type of training you do.

Seltzer
Oct 11, 2012

Ask me about Game Pass: the Best Deal in Gaming!
Dropping this off here. The yearly 27 on 27 mma bout with a ball is happening and I made a thread.
http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3725616

Le Saboteur
Dec 5, 2007

I hear you wish to ball, adventurer..

Seltzer posted:

Dropping this off here. The yearly 27 on 27 mma bout with a ball is happening and I made a thread.
http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3725616

So can guys just square off in these games and completely ignore whats going on with the ball?

Seltzer
Oct 11, 2012

Ask me about Game Pass: the Best Deal in Gaming!

Le Saboteur posted:

So can guys just square off in these games and completely ignore whats going on with the ball?

Ask in the thread!!!

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Seltzer
Oct 11, 2012

Ask me about Game Pass: the Best Deal in Gaming!

Seltzer posted:

Dropping this off here. The yearly 27 on 27 mma bout with a ball is happening and I made a thread.
http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3725616

This is actually starting now.

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