blackberry deathwatch 2014.10.2.1.537 (now with fm radio) [plus canadachat]

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > blackberry deathwatch 2014.10.2.1.537 (now with fm radio) [plus canadachat]

«‹›71 »

during which ancient egyptian month will blackberry die?
	thout
	paopi
	hathor
	koiak
	tobi
	meshir
	paremhat
	paremoude
	pashons
	paoni
	epip
	mesori
	gasthred
	banop
	RIM'S GONNA KEEP GOING BABY!!!

[Edit Poll (moderators only)]

View Results

Mister Facetious: Apr 21, 2007; I think I died and woke up in L.A.,
I don't know how I wound up in this place...

Mr. Apollo posted:

# ? Jun 9, 2015 22:00

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 9, 2024 20:49

Mr. Apollo: Nov 8, 2000

The Management posted:

I just want to know if he understands what went wrong or if he still thinks consumers care about keyboards and data efficiency

it sounded like he was trying to shift the blame to other people. he talked about how AT&T and its exclusive with Apple for the iPhone was the beginning of the end. he mentioned how they tried to compete with the storm but failed spectacularly by just throwing features on a device without understanding why people liked the iPhone and ended up having a 100% return rate on it. he said those two things indicated to him that the market had changed and thy could no longer compete in the mainstream and high end market. he said he wanted to shift the company towards services more and low end phones for the developing world. the implication was that "other forces" won and voted down his ideas and eventually lead to his departure.

# ? Jun 9, 2015 22:42

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

the only people other than blackberry who believed that not using much data (and also not really being able to do much) was a killer feature were massive corporates who were locked into some utter poo poo plans.

when you can get your employees iphones with decent amounts of data on a business plan for �1 a day then who the gently caress cares about blackberry

# ? Jun 9, 2015 22:48

Subjunctive: Sep 12, 2006; ✨sparkle and shine✨

Apple's deal with AT&T was a pretty huge change from how those deals had been structured in the past. if you'd asked a handset manufacturer a week before if that sort of deal was even possible they'd have laughed in your face.

# ? Jun 9, 2015 23:08

~Coxy: Dec 9, 2003; R.I.P. Inter-OS Sass - b.2000AD d.2003AD

yeah the only thing I feel pity towards blackberry for was their (apparent) attempts to get better data plans and app store equivalents from the carriers

of course they might be rewriting the past about that in an attempt to not seem so incompetent

# ? Jun 10, 2015 10:28

Kenny Logins: Jan 11, 2011; EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP AND OPEN PALM SLAM A WHITE WHALE INTO THE PEQUOD. IT'S HELL'S HEART AND RIGHT THEN AND THERE I STRIKE AT THEE ALONGSIDE WITH THE MAIN CHARACTER, ISHMAEL.

Subjunctive posted:

Balsillie gave a commencement address at a college I know, and was quite possibly high.

lol

quote:

We had questions.
But after the speech was over and the diplomas were bestowed, Balsillie saw the media horde � two reporters and a TSN camera � and bolted. It was a comical getaway.
A security guard drove around the building in the luxury SUV in which Balsillie had driven himself. The deeper brain hopped in the driver's seat and screeched away from the bad men and their hurtful curiosity, presumably on to the backed-up 401 for the long commute to Kitchener-Waterloo.
Why not an empathetic: "No comment, jerkheads?" Why can't he do things like everyone else?
And speaking of abiding gratitude, what's wrong with the world when a billionaire, thankful he can afford a helicopter, can't give the plebes the gift of one less truck on the highway?

when you think about it... he probably already did with that "stolen" shipment of playbooks

# ? Jun 10, 2015 13:23

The Management: Jan 2, 2010; sup, bitch?

correction, he was a billionaire when RIM stock was at an all time high. today the combined fortunes of lizard lips and silly balls are don't make one billionaire

# ? Jun 10, 2015 15:38

prefect: Sep 11, 2001; No one, Woodhouse.
No one.; Dead Man’s Band

The Management posted:

correction, he was a billionaire when RIM stock was at an all time high. today the combined fortunes of lizard lips and silly balls are don't make one billionaire

i think william shatner was a billionaire for twenty minutes because he had a zillion priceline options

# ? Jun 10, 2015 15:48

Mister Facetious: Apr 21, 2007; I think I died and woke up in L.A.,
I don't know how I wound up in this place...

http://www.technobuffalo.com/2015/06/09/blackberry-oslo-specs-photos-leak-rumors/

quote:

BlackBerry �Oslo� revealed in new photos
BY JACOB KLEINMAN | JUNE 9, 2015

Ready for a new BlackBerry phone? The Canadian company has served up some interesting devices in the past year, and it looks like another new QWERTY handset could be just around the corner.

The BlackBerry �Oslo� was revealed with a series of leaked photos on Tuesday courtesy of N4BB. This is the first time we�re getting a look at the actual device, though we saw a few renders back in April. Overall the Oslo looks like a simplified version of last year�s Passport with a beveled rubber back and a redesigned camera.

On the spec side of things, the BlackBerry Oslo will reportedly pack a Snapdragon 800 processor, a 13-megapixel rear camera, 3GB of RAM and a 3450mAh battery. Like the Passport, the new phone features a square display, though there�s no word on its exact size of resolution. It also looks like the Oslo might pack a fingerprint reader on the back, but we�re not certain that�s what we�re looking at in the image above.

N4BB notes that the Oslo might not get a global release. Instead it could be a Chinese version of the BlackBerry Passport. In that case the phone may not merit a huge public announcement, though we�ll still be on the lookout for any more news for the upcoming QWERTY device.

# ? Jun 10, 2015 21:35

Kenny Logins: Jan 11, 2011; EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP AND OPEN PALM SLAM A WHITE WHALE INTO THE PEQUOD. IT'S HELL'S HEART AND RIGHT THEN AND THERE I STRIKE AT THEE ALONGSIDE WITH THE MAIN CHARACTER, ISHMAEL.

Mister Macys posted:

http://www.technobuffalo.com/2015/06/09/blackberry-oslo-specs-photos-leak-rumors/

should of been called the stockholm

# ? Jun 11, 2015 00:16

Subjunctive: Sep 12, 2006; ✨sparkle and shine✨

Kenny Logins posted:

should of been called the stockholm

# ? Jun 11, 2015 00:17

Mister Facetious: Apr 21, 2007; I think I died and woke up in L.A.,
I don't know how I wound up in this place...

quote:

On the spec side of things, the BlackBerry Oslo will reportedly pack a Snapdragon 800 processor

congratulations on catching up to the G2, a two year old device.

# ? Jun 11, 2015 01:38

Asymmetric POSTer: Aug 17, 2005

Kenny Logins posted:

should of been called the stockholm

# ? Jun 11, 2015 10:29

The Kins: Oct 2, 2004

reuters is reporting that blackberry is rumored to be considering throwing its metaphorical hands up, going "gently caress it" and just flat-out releasing an android

quote:

BlackBerry is considering equipping an upcoming smartphone with Google Inc.'s Android software for the first time, an acknowledgement that its revamped line of devices has failed to win mass appeal, according to four sources familiar with the matter.

The move would be an about-face for the Waterloo, Ontario-based company, which had shunned Android in a bet that its BlackBerry 10 line of phones would be able to claw back market share lost to Apple's (AAPL.O) iPhone and a slew of devices powered by Android.

The sources, who asked not to be named as they have not been authorized to discuss the matter publicly, said the move to use Android is part of BlackBerry's strategy to pivot to focus on software and device management. BlackBerry, which once dominated smartphone sales, now has a market share of less than 1 percent.

It is not clear whether a move to use Android would spell the end of the company's BlackBerry 10 line of devices that were initially launched to much fanfare in early 2013. After positive early reviews, the late-to-launch BlackBerry devices haven't competed well with Android or Apple, mainly due to a lack of big name apps.

"We don't comment on rumors and speculation, but we remain committed to the BlackBerry 10 operating system, which provides security and productivity benefits that are unmatched," said the company in an email.

A Google spokeswoman declined to comment.

...

Two sources said that by launching an Android-based device of its own, BlackBerry would be sending a signal to skeptics that it is confident that the BES12 system can not only manage, but also secure smartphones and tablets powered by rival operating systems.

BlackBerry will probably use Android on an upcoming slider device that is likely to be released this autumn, two sources said. The slider will combine a touch screen with a physical keyboard that users can use if they prefer.

BlackBerry briefly showed off the slider device on stage at Mobile World Congress in Barcelona in March, but it has provided little detail on it since then.

By making an Android device that boasts a large touchscreen and a physical keyboard, BlackBerry hopes to snag a niche in the touchscreen-dominated Android market. The device may attract those still using older BlackBerry keyboard handhelds but who want access to the larger app options Android offers.

# ? Jun 12, 2015 17:18

Pinterest Mom: Jun 9, 2009

The Kins posted:

reuters is reporting that blackberry is rumored to be considering throwing its metaphorical hands up, going "gently caress it" and just flat-out releasing an android

finally, a device with the security of an android and the usability of a blackberry

# ? Jun 12, 2015 17:39

The Management: Jan 2, 2010; sup, bitch?

rip QNX*, you weren't very good

*in the phone

# ? Jun 12, 2015 17:47

Mister Facetious: Apr 21, 2007; I think I died and woke up in L.A.,
I don't know how I wound up in this place...

The Kins posted:

reuters is reporting that blackberry is rumored to be considering throwing its metaphorical hands up, going "gently caress it" and just flat-out releasing an android

"We don't comment on rumors and speculation, but we remain committed to the BlackBerry 10 operating system, which provides security and productivity benefits that are unmatched," said the company in an email.

nobody cares about security and productivity in the real world; people want videos, music streaming, big fuckoff screens, and lovely f2p games. this is why you're within the margin of error for market share

# ? Jun 13, 2015 00:58

~Coxy: Dec 9, 2003; R.I.P. Inter-OS Sass - b.2000AD d.2003AD

that article is wrong; blackberry never dominated smartphone sales

# ? Jun 13, 2015 02:52

Cocoa Crispies: Jul 20, 2001; Vehicular Manslaughter!; Pillbug

~Coxy posted:

that article is wrong; blackberry never dominated smartphone sales

weren't they on the cusp when sarnsung made a phone called the "blackjack" that was the same poo poo but running wince?

# ? Jun 13, 2015 14:28

A Pinball Wizard: Mar 23, 2005; I know every trick, no freak's gonna beat my hands; College Slice

~Coxy posted:

that article is wrong; blackberry never dominated smartphone sales

it didnt?

# ? Jun 13, 2015 15:44

Pinterest Mom: Jun 9, 2009

A Pinball Wizard posted:

it didnt?

symbian->android

# ? Jun 13, 2015 15:45

~Coxy: Dec 9, 2003; R.I.P. Inter-OS Sass - b.2000AD d.2003AD

that's if you even count symbian/blackberry as "smartphones"

because if they count, then a RAZR and basically every other high end mobile phone circa 2004 counts too

# ? Jun 13, 2015 15:51

Nintendo Kid: Aug 4, 2011; by Smythe

Pinterest Mom posted:

symbian->android

and i think before that win mo or palm

# ? Jun 13, 2015 16:50

Nintendo Kid: Aug 4, 2011; by Smythe

~Coxy posted:

that's if you even count symbian/blackberry as "smartphones"

because if they count, then a RAZR and basically every other high end mobile phone circa 2004 counts too

lol no. high end symbian was definitely a working smartphone platform, and was always more popular than blackberry until android overtook it.

# ? Jun 13, 2015 16:51

big shtick energy: May 27, 2004

Nintendo Kid posted:

lol no. high end symbian was definitely a working smartphone platform, and was always more popular than blackberry until android overtook it.

fishmech was ... right?

anyway yeah it had a full web browser, email, music player, etc. so I don't see how it wasn't a smartphone os (symbian s60, not the s40 os which was for featurephones)

worldwide it was more popular, but you couldn't really buy them in north america for the most part

# ? Jun 13, 2015 17:56

Boxturret: Oct 3, 2013; Don't ask me about Sonic the Hedgehog diaper fetish

DuckConference posted:

fishmech was ... right?

uh...yeah? fishmech is always right

# ? Jun 13, 2015 18:01

pram: Jun 10, 2001

fishmech is only as right as wikipedia is

# ? Jun 14, 2015 00:07

Subjunctive: Sep 12, 2006; ✨sparkle and shine✨

fishmech usually has true facts and often has wrong opinions based on them

# ? Jun 14, 2015 00:23

atomicthumbs: Dec 26, 2010; We're in the business of extending man's senses.

Fishmech: the poster anyone can edit.

# ? Jun 14, 2015 00:35

pram: Jun 10, 2001

that was liface

# ? Jun 14, 2015 00:37

~Coxy: Dec 9, 2003; R.I.P. Inter-OS Sass - b.2000AD d.2003AD

DuckConference posted:

anyway yeah it had a full web browser, email, music player, etc.

my point is that so did a RAZR

# ? Jun 14, 2015 01:49

Subjunctive: Sep 12, 2006; ✨sparkle and shine✨

~Coxy posted:

my point is that so did a RAZR

was the RAZR around when the 957 was?

# ? Jun 14, 2015 01:53

pram: Jun 10, 2001

# ? Jun 14, 2015 02:01

Nintendo Kid: Aug 4, 2011; by Smythe

~Coxy posted:

my point is that so did a RAZR

your point is moronic

# ? Jun 14, 2015 02:18

ahmeni: May 1, 2005; It's one continuous form where hardware and software function in perfect unison, creating a new generation of iPhone that's better by any measure.; Grimey Drawer

at its peak in 2009 blackberry had a market share of 20% compared to nokias 40%

# ? Jun 14, 2015 03:18

Mister Facetious: Apr 21, 2007; I think I died and woke up in L.A.,
I don't know how I wound up in this place...

ahmeni posted:

at its peak in 2009 blackberry had a market share of 20% compared to nokias 40%

please don't skew the facts with common plebs please. enterprise and government share only.

bbry provides world-leading best-in-class tools, not toys for productivity and security-minded individuals in corporate, government, and small business.

# ? Jun 14, 2015 05:31

A Pinball Wizard: Mar 23, 2005; I know every trick, no freak's gonna beat my hands; College Slice

No, I'm not going to get an iPhone, quit emailing me about it. I'm not getting one because I already have a phone that's better: it's called the Nokia E70, it's the pinnacle of human achievement, and I love it more than my family:

You've probably never heard of the E70 because Nokia's marketing team is busy finding every last dick in the universe to suck, so I'm going to do their job for them and tell you about this product. And no, I'm not being paid to do this. I'm just tired of the iPhone fanboys shooting huge sticky wads and high-fiving each other (literally) over their stupid cellphones.

First of all, the E70 has a full keyboard, not some lovely stripped down, tap-and-pray smudgy piece of poo poo. Nokia uses a technology that's even more advanced than the iPhone's tap screen, allowing you to actually feel the keys you press as you're pressing them! The technology is called "tactile response," and it allows you to do things like dial a phone number without staring at your screen like a poo poo-chucking ape. In fact, every other cellphone ever made has this technology, sometimes called "buttons."

This keyboard will not only stomp your colon, but the colons of distant relatives of the human species such as lagomorphs, and hypothetical colons of children you haven't even had yet. Want to type a backslash? No problem. Ampersand? You bet your rear end. On an iPhone, you have to press an additional button that opens up an alternate keypad that will allow you to type numbers and punctuation. So typing something as simple as elipses (...) requires you to tap your finger 9 times. Enjoy your phone, losers! People like me who have poo poo to do will stick to a keyboard that doesn't have its lips wrapped firmly to the user-interface equivalent of a throbbing dong:

lovely.

When the iPhone was first announced, CEO Steve Jobs spewed enough BS to cover a football field full of babies 3 feet deep in bullshit, which sounds cool because he could have potentially murdered a football field full of babies, but he passed on this opportunity by introducing the phone instead. He claimed that the phone was three devices in one: an iPod, a phone, and an "Internet communications device." Oooh, an Internet communications device?! AWESOME!

It's not three devices in one any more than my laptop is you morons. Using Jobs' loose definition of what constitutes a separate device, technically my laptop can be considered 8 devices in one:

A clock
A calculator
An "Internet communications device"
A phone (I can make voice calls with my modem)
A pornographic media storage device
A video player
A word processor
And an "iPod" (see below)

There's no such thing as an iPod. The word "iPod" is a marketing tool for a hard drive with software that plays mp3s. Yeah, doesn't sound so sexy now, does it you chimps? And an "internet communications device" is officially the douchebaggiest way of saying "it has a browser." So actually it's just a phone that plays mp3s and has a browser. SNORE.

The Nokia E70 not only plays mp3s, video, has a full browser and Wi-Fi, IMAP and POP3 email, and Google Maps, but you can even run terminal software to telnet or SSH into remote servers. What that means in non-geek is that my phone is invincible. I can literally do anything. I can reboot my web server if I want, and sometimes I do just because I can:

All of this power from a phone that's over a year old, and it only costs $360. Even the browser kicks rear end:

Here's a non-biased, side-by-side comparison of some key features of each phone:

iPhone Nokia E70
Resolution: 320x480 352x416
Storage: 4 or 8 gigs (fixed). Unlimited. The E70 can use hot-swappable 2 GB mini SD cards, so you can have as much storage as you want.
Can customize ringtones with your own mp3s:
Can record video:
Screen turns into a smudgy piece of poo poo after a few minutes of use:
Can send MMS messages:
You have to send your phone to Apple when the battery dies and risk getting your phone lost, stolen, or damaged in transit: Yes. No.
Plays MP3s:
Holds your phone hostage to Apple for new software updates because Apple won't allow everyone to develop applications for it:
Voice dialing:
Can record voice:
Instant messaging: No. Yes.
Can't do fundamental tasks like copy & paste text: Yes. No. Double negative, bitches!

There you have it: the most objective comparison of two cellphones ever made. I think I'll take the rest of the afternoon off and copy and paste text on my cellphone because I can.

5,953,307 people who bought an iPhone hadn't heard of the Nokia E70 until now because Nokia's marketing team is too busy tossing salad to get the word out.

Back to how much I rule... � New Book Announcement � Store � Email � �

# ? Jun 14, 2015 16:02

Mister Facetious: Apr 21, 2007; I think I died and woke up in L.A.,
I don't know how I wound up in this place...

I haven't read that since he posted it.

the last article I ever read of his was either that jerky & tobasco "breakfast cereal" or the Quantum of Solace review.

# ? Jun 14, 2015 16:45

Wheany: Mar 17, 2006; Spinya^{ha^{ha^haha}ha}ha_{ha_{ha_haha}ha}ha!; Doctor Rope

~Coxy posted:

my point is that so did a RAZR

symbian had a ton of native (as in c++) third-party apps

# ? Jun 14, 2015 17:32

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 9, 2024 20:49

qirex: Feb 15, 2001

I had a Nokia e71 and it was a good phone

iphone think pieces written before the app store should be given a bit of a pass IMO, not enough to excuse that smugstorm above but in context they're slightly more forgivable

# ? Jun 14, 2015 18:44

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > blackberry deathwatch 2014.10.2.1.537 (now with fm radio) [plus canadachat]

«‹›71 »