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vyst
Aug 25, 2009



JediTalentAgent posted:

So, another article about meeting someone you don't like on OKCupid popped up...

IT HAPPENED TO ME: My OKCupid Date Called Me "Rubensian"...and I Slept With Him Anyway

Lol xojane is full of just terrible people

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staberind
Feb 20, 2008

but i dont wanna be a spaceship
Fun Shoe
I am fat and desperate for more cock, you see, i have a cock scorecard.
So desperate, in fact, that when a guy said, "oh, you are fat" on a date, I did not immediately post it to tumbler or reply with something equally factual but unpleasant, At some point he put his wee wee in my woo woo.

LethalGeek
Nov 4, 2009

vyst posted:

Lol xojane is full of just broken women

George H.W. Cunt
Oct 6, 2010





vyst posted:

Lol xojane is full of just terrible people

this site sure is something else. broken women and slam whales

LethalGeek
Nov 4, 2009

quote:

My self-summary
Let's put it this way: if it has a nickle, and it has a back, Imma hop on and ride!

What I知 doing with my life
Currently working at a great Italian restaurant saving up to persue my dream of following Nickleback around the world, and eventually having reconstructive facial surgery to make me every man's fantasy: female Chad Kroeger.

I知 really good at
Nickleback karaoke, Nickleback crochet, Nickleback fan fiction, Nickleback pasta, Nickleback paper mache, Nickleback phlebotomy, Nickleback exotic vignettes, Nickleback drywall, Coca Cola, Rolla coasta.

Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Creed

The six things I could never do without
1)My Chad Kroeger boyfriend pillow
2)Spaghetti o's
3)My Sneaky Pete lady toy
4)Nickleback concert girtle
5)Methamphetamine
6)A father's love

I spend a lot of time thinking about
Urban dick watching

On a typical Friday night I am
Perfecting my Chad Kroeger kitten purr.

You should message me if
You feel the same way. Or want a quick, Nicklebacky bj.

staberind
Feb 20, 2008

but i dont wanna be a spaceship
Fun Shoe
Oh, wow, http://www.xojane.com/it-happened-to-me/kristin-davis-beauty-behind-bars

"I have been in prison for almost 6 months. Most days, I look in the mirror and I don't like what I see."

George H.W. Cunt
Oct 6, 2010






this one sounds fun

nig nog tryin to get a nicklebeezy

Meme Poker Party
Sep 1, 2006

by Azathoth

I'm just gonna go ahead and say that this was probably not written in earnest.

LethalGeek
Nov 4, 2009

Chomp8645 posted:

I'm just gonna go ahead and say that this was probably not written in earnest.

Amused me either way

TenementFunster
Feb 20, 2003

The Cooler King
hahahahah some loser actually negged his way into a fat girl's vagina in 2015. I don't know who is more pathetic

Lawman 0
Aug 17, 2010

quote:

oh, geoengineering u seem cool man, keep up the good work :)

and when ur at the top of ur field someday, well u kno u might expect to see urself there =)

<3x
also caption for her profile photo

quote:

obligatorily sad, taken today, the news of people killing each other sometimes hits hard it appears
uhhh

Anton Chigurh
Mar 18, 2008
Probation
Can't post for 9 years!

quote:

My self-summary
Im just looking for now. I am a 34 yr old mom with a 8 yr old boy. He is my life. Im not loose and wont hang with a dude who thinks he can walk into our live as a A.K.A. Dirty Uncle. If you think your going to force your way in like that I will kick your rear end and I have the strength to do it.But if you want to hang and be freinds thats cool. As long as you can respect me as a person and not a naughty barista thats great. Family is important to me as long as they are supportive and not smothering. I dont do traditional gender roles. So if you are expecting to be treated a specific way because you are male. Go away. Im not a sexual person and will hurt you if you try to make me be. So dont feel entittled. I'm patient not obedient. Im a spirtualist and like the paranormal. I alsoe draw a little and am open to new things. I need a freind and to just get out.

What I知 doing with my life
i dont know yet. im just taking it day by day. I work graveyard shift and raise my son full time. So Im kind of biusy just being Mom,Dad and GuardDog

I知 really good at
Drawing. And taking care of us. My son and I. Listening. I'm not an academic type of intelligence. I don't keep up on popular culture. But I am fluid and can kind of meld with the people around me as long as there no tention, pushing away, or high expectations. I can be nasty. But the best relationships I've ever had wernt expected, and had no expectations.
Relationships are like farts. If you have to force it its probly poo poo.

The first things people usually notice about me
Either my look or my son. Somtimes i dress quite artistic or difrently. My son just has a great personality.

Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I watch a lot of Ghost Adventures. That would be a great date. Adventure Time, Regular Show, Matrix, Blades of Glory, Down Parascope, surf the net for questions i have at the time.

The six things I could never do without
Self respect,solid income, car, house,pets, and my son. With out my son the rest dont realy mean much.

I spend a lot of time thinking about
getting rich and fully independent. There has to be a biusness that alows my 2 person family freedom and fun.

On a typical Friday night I am
Sleeping and doing the dishes. Im not a welfare mom after all. But Saturday nights and Sunday days are free most of the time😄

The most private thing I知 willing to admit
Im hard to get close to. Its not like me to cuddle a person. Im not a real intimate person. That's why trying to force anything is a bad idea.

You should message me if
If your not expecting casual sex and just want to shoot the poop. Or if you need to just talk to somone. I can do that. I need someone to talk to too.

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014


Ramrod XTreme
guys i am an emotional and temporal parasite and i am not going to gently caress you

msg me

kisses

Captain Yossarian
Feb 24, 2011

All new" Rings of Fire"

staberind posted:

Oh, wow, http://www.xojane.com/it-happened-to-me/kristin-davis-beauty-behind-bars

"I have been in prison for almost 6 months. Most days, I look in the mirror and I don't like what I see."

As a prisoner, I sometimes wonder why I don't get literally all the same luxuries as person on the outside. Weird

Lil Swamp Booger Baby
Aug 1, 1981

I'm supposed to be leaving to go on a date but I literally can't stop posting in GBS

raton
Jul 28, 2003

by FactsAreUseless

Top City Homo posted:

guys i am an emotional and temporal parasite and i am not going to gently caress you

msg me

kisses

Probably financial too :h:

a dog from hell
Oct 18, 2009

by zen death robot
Girls just want to chat online and tell you their favorite TV shows, none of them want to meet n gently caress.

a dog from hell
Oct 18, 2009

by zen death robot

Lufiron posted:

don't get hung up on women that reject you and the excuses they use, just move on. it's better for everyone this way, and all you have it way easier than them in the long run.
How do I have it way easier than the pretty blonde girls that I have an insatiable urge to impregnate?

Zedsdeadbaby
Jun 14, 2008

You have been called out, in the ways of old.

a dog from hell posted:

How do I have it way easier than the pretty blonde girls that I have an insatiable urge to impregnate?

Fine wine, vinegar etc

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014


Ramrod XTreme

Sheep-Goats posted:

Probably financial too :h:

need to feed my spawn

looking for cuck fetishist willing to raise my child and provide

will not gently caress

LethalGeek
Nov 4, 2009

a dog from hell posted:

Girls just want to chat online and tell you their favorite TV shows, none of them want to meet n gently caress.
I get why women are all putting "not here for hookups" in their profiles but at the same time if you hang out with them for an hour or two and not act like a twat odds are they'll gently caress you anyway. I swear a lot of them are lying to themselves

The B_36
Jul 10, 2012

LethalGeek posted:

I get why women are all putting "not here for hookups" in their profiles but at the same time if you hang out with them for an hour or two and not act like a twat odds are they'll gently caress you anyway. I swear a lot of them are lying to themselves

They put that "not looking for hookups" thing in there in a (hopeless) attempt to ward off the guys who open up a conversation with a dick pic. If you play it a little slow and gradually steer the conversation the right way, most of them will send you naked pics and gently caress you 5minutes after meeting you.

FedEx Mercury
Jan 7, 2004

Me bad posting? That's unpossible!
Lipstick Apathy
Huh I never thought to try that.

a dog from hell
Oct 18, 2009

by zen death robot
It's still too much online chatting.

LethalGeek
Nov 4, 2009

a dog from hell posted:

It's still too much online chatting.
P much

Groovelord Neato
Dec 6, 2014


I dunno usually girls just send you their phone number if you go more than like four msgs on okc without asking for it.

Vaginapocalypse
Mar 15, 2013

:qq: B-but it's so hard being white! Waaaaaagh! :qq:
If u have to ask for a number you already lost the game son :smuggo:

Lawman 0
Aug 17, 2010

Are nurses fun to date y/n?

anime was right
Jun 27, 2008

death is certain
keep yr cool

Lawman 0 posted:

Are nurses fun to date y/n?

they have no free time and are often exhausted

Groovelord Neato
Dec 6, 2014


Lawman 0 posted:

Are nurses fun to date y/n?

I hope so since that's 90 percent of okc.

WIFEY WATCHDOG
Jun 25, 2012

Yeah, well I don't trust this guy. I think he regifted, he degifted, and now he's using an upstairs invite as a springboard to a Super Bowl sex romp.
nurses eat rear end

Groovelord Neato
Dec 6, 2014


Either nurses or grad students so you got the choice of never seeing your SO or helping her pay off useless debt for 50 years.

FeculentWizardTits
Aug 31, 2001

LOU BEGAS MUSTACHE posted:

they have no free time and are often exhausted

Also all of their stories are the same.

www
Aug 4, 2010

Lawman 0 posted:

Are nurses fun to date y/n?

nurses are good people but no fun to date

toggle
Nov 7, 2005

Lawman 0 posted:

Are nurses fun to date y/n?

if you work full time and they have weird shifts, good luck. they're usually dirty and like to drink. good chances they will be nuts

Risky
May 18, 2003

The B_36 posted:

They put that "not looking for hookups" thing in there in a (hopeless) attempt to ward off the guys who open up a conversation with a dick pic. If you play it a little slow and gradually steer the conversation the right way, most of them will send you naked pics and gently caress you 5minutes after meeting you.

Confirmed got a fwb a month ago and working on another now. This is a fun.

Breetai
Nov 6, 2005

🥄Mah spoon is too big!🍌

Lawman 0 posted:

Are nurses fun to date y/n?

They pretty much universally run to fat after they hit 30 because their lovely schedule drives them to eat lovely food and stress eat with no time/energy for regular exercise, and at some point or other they will get a lifelong hip, shoulder, or back injury either lifting a hyperobese patient or trying to catch a falling granny who dies anyway.


e: who wants to see a hard 39?



She's 39 years young and a fan of Motley Crue. Go get her, boys,

Breetai fucked around with this message at 00:22 on Jun 28, 2015

thinking_now_when
Apr 2, 2010

Groovelord Neato posted:

Either nurses or grad students so you got the choice of never seeing your SO or helping her pay off useless debt for 50 years.

So nurses it is then

raton
Jul 28, 2003

by FactsAreUseless

Lawman 0 posted:

Are nurses fun to date y/n?

Yes.

Don't talk about your stupid computer janitor job though because while no one cares about it they really don't care about it.

toggle posted:

good chances they will be nuts

The ones that aren't nuts and/or ugly are already wife number two for some doctor they used to work with.

Spakstik posted:

Also all of their stories are the same.

All of everybody's stories are the loving same.

raton fucked around with this message at 00:53 on Jun 28, 2015

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George H.W. Cunt
Oct 6, 2010





back in single land with you losers ugh

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