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girl dick energy
Sep 30, 2009

You think you have the wherewithal to figure out my puzzle vagina?

DismemberedLemon posted:

Wow that actually looks really good. I'll look into getting it.
If you're playing with less than six, do not use the written rules for balancing this. I don't remember the specifics of why (or the alternatives), but it blatantly favors some of the factions.

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ConfusedUs
Feb 24, 2004

Bees?
You want fucking bees?
Here you go!
ROLL INITIATIVE!!





Some Numbers posted:

"Let's play something new" syndrome is the worst. Everything takes forever, because everyone has to learn and you have to keep buying new games and it's awful.

Thankfully I don't know many people who suffer from it, though I have run into people who compulsively buy new games.

I think the buy syndrome feeds the play something new issue for my group. We've two guys who buy an average of at least one game every week, each. Not exaggerating at all. I've been on vacation for a week and our group message text group has mention of them buying three games (two one guy, one for the other) since I left town.

And because they buy it, they want to play it. I get that, but drat!

On the rare, very rare, times when they haven't bought a new game since our last get-together, they are totally ok with replaying something.

Big McHuge
Feb 5, 2014

You wait for the war to happen like vultures.
If you want to help, prevent the war.
Don't save the remnants.

Save them all.

Bobfly posted:

I finally received my copy of Catacombs today, and oh my GOODNESS! This looks amazing, I'm having too much fun just playing with myself!

Board Game Thread 4e: I'm having too much fun just playing with myself!

girl dick energy
Sep 30, 2009

You think you have the wherewithal to figure out my puzzle vagina?

Big McHuge posted:

Board Game Thread 4e: I'm having too much fun just playing with myself!
On that note, my copy of Last Frontier arrived. All these tiny chits, with a folded map in a plastic bag... it's really cool, very old school. But I'm also loving terrified that I'm going to lose pieces. I might set up a TTS thing for it just so I don't have to worry about losing pieces playing in my tiny, messy room.

OneDeadman
Oct 16, 2010

[SUPERBIA]
Back on Eminent Domain with the expansion, my play group kinda has a problem where it feels like whoever is winning is generally the one picking up a couple of peace treaty effects early on, and this kinda feels like warfare is an absolute trap to get into/stuck into through scenarios. I understand certain techs can make it less painful but most of the good techs that can deal with the issue are behind two or three planets.

Granted, we haven't played a ton of games of it, so this might just be a combination of luck and people not paying super good attention to what other people are doing?

Bottom Liner
Feb 15, 2006


a specific vein of lasagna
Going Warfare is also 100% dependent on getting good surveys as well. You're at the mercy of the deck more than other strategies. I believe that's why the upgraded ship card can give VPs to alleviate that.

gutterdaughter
Oct 21, 2010

keep yr head up, problem girl

Poison Mushroom posted:

If you're playing with less than six, do not use the written rules for balancing this. I don't remember the specifics of why (or the alternatives), but it blatantly favors some of the factions.

Specifically, the written 5-player rules exclude House Martell and makes Dorne (the southernmost region) a neutral territory. These neutral castles become a catered buffet for Martell's neighbors, House Tyrell and House Baratheon. It's awful.

Instead of taking out Martell, take out Greyjoy. Use a token to mark Pike Island as impassable/unconquerable. (There's just such a token included for the laughably-awful three player variant. Use that.) This takes some pressure off of House Lannister, but Lannister is the game's weakest faction anyways.

If you must play 4, use the A Feast for Crows expansion instead of the base game. And 3-player AGoT is almost pointless. Just don't.

fozzy fosbourne
Apr 21, 2010

I wish Uwe would have done something like Terra Mystica or Viticulture for the turn order in Caverna. The game is mostly good at not pissing me off but it still irks me when the person directly to my left bogarts first player and the player to my right rides their coat tails and oppresses my otherwise relaxed dwarven industry. Still pretty fun

Also, the Village Idiot's Law: the person who has the most trouble making mistakes and needs help executing their turns will always go all in on the villages in Dominion, the expeditions in Caverna, the surveys in Roll/Race, the clientele in Glory to Rome, etc.

Played some Viticulture with Tuscany. It's another pretty chill worker placement; I actually feel like Caverna was a little tighter. The cards are pretty fun in terms of making it feel unpredictable but they also feel pretty swingy. One person can easily get two orders at the end that are perfect for them and another can get two orders that completely suck. There are ways to make your own luck by not needing to rely on a late game order gamble but you still can't stop someone from go fishing. Makes it a good game to play with the family though!

I loving love the components in this game. This is a good game to get your normy friends ooing and aweing

Ohthehugemanatee
Oct 18, 2005
Holy poo poo, I know there isn't a lot of love for Warhammer in this thread and there absolutely shouldn't be because it's garbage, but the current warhammer thread is really worth checking out.

They just released a new edition of fantasy and the rules are batshit. You don't so much build an army as much as you just pile miniatures onto the table until you literally run out of space. People were expecting the usual combination of grognardy stuff, forced miniature purchases and imbalances but what they got...

As an example, there's one model who is an insane knight. He has the usual things you'd expect for a wargame - bonuses in some areas, penalties in others. Want an extra edge though? If you run around the table pretending to ride an invisible horse he can re-roll his dice. He gets a stronger bonus if you talk to the horse.

There's a model that forces your opponent to have a staring contest with you. There's a model that gets better if you are holding an alcoholic beverage and one that gets better if you hold a drink aloft and proclaim the honor of "the lady." There's a character that gives you a bonus if your mustache is larger than your opponent's. There are units that force you to not smile during your turn and one that causes you to instantly lose if you ever kneel. Dancing if you play chaos gets you extra rolls and getting your opponent to dance with you is even more effective.

It is also literally possible within the framework of the game rules to offer to blow your opponent. If they accept you get to take one of their units.

The rest of the rules are about as awful looking as can be expected but GW is now asking the kind of people who want to meticulously paint 40 Brettonian knights to run circles around a table yelling at their horsey. Game stores are gonna get real weird if this takes off.

Kai Tave
Jul 2, 2012
Fallen Rib
Game stores are already pretty weird though, so.

SkeletonHero
Sep 7, 2010

:dehumanize:
:killing:
:dehumanize:
That reads like a front page article.

Games Workshop's open contempt for their customers never ceases to amaze me.

StashAugustine
Mar 24, 2013

Do not trust in hope- it will betray you! Only faith and hatred sustain.

To be fair good games can use physical elements

:v:

fozzy fosbourne
Apr 21, 2010

Man that would have devastated me like 20 years ago

gutterdaughter
Oct 21, 2010

keep yr head up, problem girl
There's a sort of nihilistic beauty to it all.

Games Workshop has finally acknowledged that they can't write an actual ruleset, so they've thrown everything into the flames. There are no point values. The mechanics crib from drunken party games. Mash your plastic bloodmen together and make pew pew sounds. It doesn't matter. Nothing matters. Death comes for us all. Smile and play with your army men.

GrandpaPants
Feb 13, 2006


Free to roam the heavens in man's noble quest to investigate the weirdness of the universe!



It's like if Unglued became the standard for Magic.

Ropes4u
May 2, 2009

Kai Tave posted:

Game stores are already pretty weird though, so.

Some neckbeard offering to blow another neckbeard in order to steal his piece is more like a bad acid trip that weird.

DismemberedLemon
Jun 20, 2015
I thought this was a joke. You can't prove it's not April 1st somewhere.

Kai Tave
Jul 2, 2012
Fallen Rib

DismemberedLemon posted:

I thought this was a joke. You can't prove it's not April 1st somewhere.

I remember when Dungeons: The Dragoning 40K came out on April 1st and people thought it had to be just a pdf full of gross porn or something but it turned out to be some dude's not-half-bad mashup of like a dozen RPGs and IPs together in a gonzo mess that was charming in its audacity.

Age of Sigmar is like that only it's dumb and wasn't just made by a dude in his spare time for kicks.

So yeah, board games! Kemet expansion looks pretty sweet so far, I dig that the new tiles do different things with the gold token, that's kind of clever. Also am I misremembering or was there supposed to be another expansion for Tash-Kalar coming out at some point, something about demons?

Dulkor
Feb 28, 2009

On the topic of GW IPs though, has anyone gotten to take Forbidden Stars for a spin yet? I'm intrigued by some of the pieces I've read, but a little gunshy of the price point without seeing more opinions on it.

Bubble-T
Dec 26, 2004

You know, I've got a funny feeling I've seen this all before.

Ohthehugemanatee posted:

The rest of the rules are about as awful looking as can be expected but GW is now asking the kind of people who want to meticulously paint 40 Brettonian knights to run circles around a table yelling at their horsey. Game stores are gonna get real weird if this takes off.

The only people I know who care about warhammer are stupid enough to be doing that kind of thing already.

Caedar
Dec 28, 2004

Will do there, buddy.

Dulkor posted:

On the topic of GW IPs though, has anyone gotten to take Forbidden Stars for a spin yet? I'm intrigued by some of the pieces I've read, but a little gunshy of the price point without seeing more opinions on it.

It's good. Buy it.

Rusty Kettle
Apr 10, 2005
Ultima! Ahmmm-bing!
Glass half full: Warhammer nerds will look for superior alternatives, find Warhammer Diskwars, and sell so many copies that FFG will print more expansions.

Countblanc
Apr 20, 2005

Help a hero out!
They'll just play 40k

The Eyes Have It
Feb 10, 2008

Third Eye Sees All
...snookums

Ohthehugemanatee posted:

They just released a new edition of fantasy and the rules are batshit.

Huh. Strictly speaking I can see what's going on - experimenting with incorporating nonstandard and atypical elements into the gameplay. Except that it seems to have been elevated straight from Experimental to Production, entirely skipping Development, Testing, Sanity Checking, etc :psyduck:

Bottom Liner
Feb 15, 2006


a specific vein of lasagna

Ohthehugemanatee posted:

There's a character that gives you a bonus if your mustache is larger than your opponent's.

So women that play Warhammer have a huge disadvantage?



Sike, the women that play Warhammer would win that every time. There's no way these rules aren't an elaborate troll. Jesus Christ.

Bottom Liner fucked around with this message at 08:18 on Jul 5, 2015

girl dick energy
Sep 30, 2009

You think you have the wherewithal to figure out my puzzle vagina?

GrandpaPants posted:



It's like if Unglued became the standard for Magic.
Jesus Christ. Did one of the head designers have a stroke while on the job? :ohdear:

Bubble-T
Dec 26, 2004

You know, I've got a funny feeling I've seen this all before.

Poison Mushroom posted:

Jesus Christ. Did one of the head designers have a stroke while on the job? :ohdear:

Worse, they played a game of Quelf

The Shame Boy
Jan 27, 2014

Dead weight, just like this post.



So today was the first time Mansions of Madness had been played in about a year and a half or, maybe 2 years. We ended up playing 2 rounds(mostly out of principle of nobody wanting to clean up all the pieces afterwards) and the second round in (which we played the 5th case) ended very,very anticlimatically. We were playing the base game so you can probably guess what happened, if you can't

When the game make it very clear that you shoulden't open the freezer, you should actually take it's advice and not do it since it's an instant win for the Keeper if you do! It's a bit of a dick move IMO since being genre savvy in this case gets you killed and as it turns out the next clue is actually on the other side of the map from where you would logically go based on the hint the clue gives you


I still can't decide if i find the experience more hilarious or excruciatingly frustrating since while the Keeper in the second round was basically new to it, he knew at least one person would take the obvious bait because why wouldn't you? You always do exactly the opposite of what the game tells you to do! Do any of the other stories/expansions have poo poo like that in them?

Poopy Palpy
Jun 10, 2000

Im da fwiggin Poopy Palpy XD

GrandpaPants posted:



It's like if Unglued became the standard for Magic.

That's an awful lot of triggers about eye contact for a game played exclusively by people on the spectrum.

ActingPower
Jun 4, 2013

HOOLY BOOLY posted:

When the game make it very clear that you shoulden't open the freezer, you should actually take it's advice and not do it since it's an instant win for the Keeper if you do! It's a bit of a dick move IMO since being genre savvy in this case gets you killed and as it turns out the next clue is actually on the other side of the map from where you would logically go based on the hint the clue gives you

The other two versions of that mission require you to open the freezer, IIRC. So yeah, damned if you do, damned if you don't.

fozzy fosbourne
Apr 21, 2010

Hmmmmmm Patchistory is $30 on CSI today. Goon recommended?

Fungah!
Apr 30, 2011

fozzy fosbourne posted:

Hmmmmmm Patchistory is $30 on CSI today. Goon recommended?

i picked up a copy to round out a CSI order and haven't had a chance to play it yet. from what i've heard the core mechanic is really cool and the se cond couple hours are cool but the first hour or so is kind of eh. also the rulebook is insanely bad and you basically need to go look up the retranslation on bgg to figure out what to do. it seems cool though

GrandpaPants
Feb 13, 2006


Free to roam the heavens in man's noble quest to investigate the weirdness of the universe!

fozzy fosbourne posted:

Hmmmmmm Patchistory is $30 on CSI today. Goon recommended?

It's probably my favorite empire building type game. The auction system to expand is fun, but my main issue stems from the objective voting system. Like there's zero reason to split up your vote rather than go all in on the one you know you'll win. I wish it were set points instead of points based on the total number of votes on the objective, but it's not a huge blemish.

Definitely recommended for 30.

Rutibex
Sep 9, 2001

by Fluffdaddy

Kai Tave posted:

I remember when Dungeons: The Dragoning 40K came out on April 1st and people thought it had to be just a pdf full of gross porn or something but it turned out to be some dude's not-half-bad mashup of like a dozen RPGs and IPs together in a gonzo mess that was charming in its audacity.

I am having a hearty gafaw at our Warhammer brothers over this Age of Sigmar fiasco. Feels so much like when 4th edition D&D came out, except 4th edition D&D actually had redeeming qualities. At least the minis are still cool, eh?

Anyway I wanted to thank you for making me aware of Dungeons: The Dragoning 40K. A setting that combines Warhammer 40,000 and Planescape? Hell yeah! :black101:

lordsummerisle
Aug 4, 2013
Our first game of Sherlock Holmes Consluting Detective was great. 3 players worked well. My parents are visiting next weekend, and I thought I might try scenario 2 with them. My mom isn't into games, but she really loves a good crime novel or tv show. Think it should be easy to sell as not a game, but rather a crime short story you read together and solve.

Oh and bobvonunheil: thanks a lot for the google map tip. Was helpful.

Toshimo
Aug 23, 2012

He's outta line...

But he's right!

I am interested in whatever you are selling.

Radioactive Toy
Sep 14, 2005

Nothing has ever happened here, nothing.
Finally played Kemet on Friday after receiving it in a trade about a year and a half ago. It was everything this thread has made it out to be for sure. It was a tense, action-filled game that kept everyone engaged for a few hours. The last round was incredibly tense as 4 out of the 5 players all had a shot to win depending on how some key actions went. I was in the lead going in to the final round and was placed first in the turn order, which made it pretty hard for me to do anything as everyone had a chance to react to my moves every turn. I thought the turn-order selection was super cool (last place player puts everyone in any order he wants for the round) as it adds an extra layer of depth to the game that took us a few rounds to realize.

The game is a little front-loaded with rules and I could see that having 48 different power tiles laid out being a bit of a shock for everyone as there seem to be a million little different symbols, but it only took about one round for everyone to get into their groove. After the game I checked out the FAQ it looked like we did two things wrong. 1. With the "Initiative" tile that lets you immediately kill two defending enemies when you attack; we thought that if you wipe out the entire force with this we assumed it meant you "won" the battle and receive a VP, but since no actual battle happened no VPs are received. This was our winner so it was a little sad but oh well. 2nd we had one person once start moving a troop, puck up the snake, and move farther using the snakes abilities. It only happened once and didn't affect the game that much but we'll know for next time.

tl;dr Kemet is everything Risk always wanted to be. It is fast, tense, and the focus on attacking stops the game from becoming a slog. Get it. It even made my turtling, direct confrontation-adverse friends love killing eachother.

Bonus tension-filled final turn panorama.

Radioactive Toy fucked around with this message at 01:25 on Jul 6, 2015

Harvey Mantaco
Mar 6, 2007

Someone please help me find my keys =(
Master Labyrinth

The copy we played of this was like 22 years old, but it's a game about 4 wizards out-hating each other over magical spell components in their every-shifting hoarding nightmare labyrinth. Takes about 15-20 minutes to play.

The idea is the the maze is full of some maze pieces that are attached to the game board, but those along the lanes with arrows are placed in randomly. There is always an extra piece that you can shove in at one end, causing everything on that maze to shift. The regents all have a number and must be collected in that order. Your dude can move as far as he wants to go, as long as there is a clear path. At the start of the game you draw a card with 3 regents on it that if you acquire, give you extra points. The game just gets more and more intense as higher numbered regents are worth more points.

The point of the game is basically 25% getting regents, 50% getting your special regents, 200% making sure your opponents can't get theirs and get locked into inescapable sections of maze.

Buy this game if you see it.


Morpheus
Apr 18, 2008

My favourite little monsters
Played a game of Black Fleet a couple days ago...the idea was alright, but it had some elements that made any strategic choices in the game worthless.

For those unfamiliar, in Black Fleet, you control a merchant ship and a pirate ship, and your opponents control the same, but in their colors. You want to get doubloons, with the goal to buy the five upgrade cards of varying costs in front of you. To do this, you trade with your merchant ship, attack with your pirate ship, and also you can control neutral ships that can attack pirates. Attacking earns you some money, but selling a ship full of goods is where the real bucks are at. You have two movement cards in your hand at any given point that have numbers on them stating how far your different ships can go on your turn, and you play one to do so.

The problem with the game is that the winner can be decided when the upgrade cards are dealt. See, everyone gets an upgrade card of each cost (5, 8, 11, 14, and 20), but what you actually get isn't the same. And some of the abilities are ridiculously unbalanced. For example, I got a card that allowed me to teleport my pirate ship to various squares around the board...I think there were two or three of them. Neat. One of my opponents, however, got a card that allowed him to use both of his movement cards in the same turn, sending all of his ships barreling across the waves to do whatever he wanted. Furthermore, he got a card that allowed the neutral ships to attack merchant ships on his turn, and in addition in earns him even more money than attacking pirate ships. Oh, no, but it's okay because I got the ability where my pirate ships could bury loot and attack in the same turn, something which came up exactly once as a benefit to me. Hurray.

Anyway, there just wasn't any strategy to it once those upgrade cards were played. It was just...oh I guess you guys with great cards are simply have better options that me, straight up. Welp.

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Rutibex
Sep 9, 2001

by Fluffdaddy

Harvey Mantaco posted:

Master Labyrinth

The copy we played of this was like 22 years old, but it's a game about 4 wizards out-hating each other over magical spell components in their every-shifting hoarding nightmare labyrinth. Takes about 15-20 minutes to play.

The idea is the the maze is full of some maze pieces that are attached to the game board, but those along the lanes with arrows are placed in randomly. There is always an extra piece that you can shove in at one end, causing everything on that maze to shift. The regents all have a number and must be collected in that order. Your dude can move as far as he wants to go, as long as there is a clear path. At the start of the game you draw a card with 3 regents on it that if you acquire, give you extra points. The game just gets more and more intense as higher numbered regents are worth more points.

The point of the game is basically 25% getting regents, 50% getting your special regents, 200% making sure your opponents can't get theirs and get locked into inescapable sections of maze.

Buy this game if you see it.




This looks a lot like aMazing Labyrinth, which is a game you can buy at Toys-R-Us today:
https://boardgamegeek.com/boardgame/1219/amazeing-labyrinth

Rutibex fucked around with this message at 01:32 on Jul 6, 2015

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