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pwnyXpress posted:Wife is just over 12 weeks now with the twins. Had a big scare last night, she started bleeding pretty bad. We went to the ER and they had us in the waiting room for nearly 3 awful hours, during which time the bleeding stopped. Ultrasound showed absolutely no problems, and the babies are still alive and kicking, thankfully. Nobody has any idea why she started bleeding. Hopefully it won't happen again, but don't be shocked if it does. At that stage two of the most common causes are something called a subchorionic hematoma and placenta previa. Both typically resolve on their own without causing any other issues besides scary bleeding, both can be difficult to detect on ultrasound, and both may cause multiple episodes of bleeding. Pelvic rest (no sex, no orgasms, no heavy lifting) is typically helpful at reducing the amount and intensity of bleeding episodes but likely makes no difference in the actual outcome of the pregnancy. Ditto any sort of bed rest. I've bled in every pregnancy so I know how scary it is. If it helps at all the pregnancy that had the most bleeding by far is the one that gave me my completely healthy daughter. With my two miscarriages the bleeding was comparatively light. marauderthirty posted:We got our results back today for our MaterniT21 test and so far everything looks good! I understand there is always the chance for false negatives but I would be lying if I said that wasn't a huge weight off our backs. We also had the results regarding the gender mailed to my mom, and we are doing a gender reveal party Friday to find out along with our guests. Can't wait! I've been hesitant to think of names until we knew the gender, and now I feel like I can actually start giving that serious thought. Glad everything came back looking good! I know it was a huge weight off our shoulders when we got back those results. Hope the gender reveal is fun.
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Jun 3, 2015 22:13
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BlueCat posted:My unfortunate mental state is also playing a bit of havoc on my marriage, my poor husband feels I'm ruining all this, which should be exciting and cool. I can't control it, and it's so hard. There is no ''right" way to feel when pregnant, and it's extremely unhelpful for anyone to have expectations about how you should feel. Despite both my kids being very planned and very welcome, there were long stretches when I really resented being pregnant. It's a huge life change, and it's entirely normal if you feel every single emotion over the next nine months. Hell, some days I'd feel every emotion in nine minutes! As others have said, don't underestimate the impact hormones can have, and keep telling your doctor/ midwife if you're still feeling anxious because there is help available.
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Jun 3, 2015 22:15
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BlueCat posted:Thanks for your comments everyone, at this stage, everything means a lot to me. Lorazepam Prescription drug Consult a doctor if you have a medical concern. Treats anxiety, anxiety with depression, and insomnia (trouble sleeping). This medicine is a benzodiazepine. By mouth: Side effects - Warnings - How to use Injection: Side effects - Warnings - How to use National Library of Medicine Pregnancy risk: Category D (Positive evidence of risk)
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Jun 4, 2015 05:51
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On the flip side, B6 is super safe and pregnancy class A. Not sure what that's treating with regard to anxiety, but I took it for nausea my whole pregnancy.
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Jun 4, 2015 06:08
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Ceridwen posted:Hopefully it won't happen again, but don't be shocked if it does. At that stage two of the most common causes are something called a subchorionic hematoma and placenta previa. Both typically resolve on their own without causing any other issues besides scary bleeding, both can be difficult to detect on ultrasound, and both may cause multiple episodes of bleeding. Pelvic rest (no sex, no orgasms, no heavy lifting) is typically helpful at reducing the amount and intensity of bleeding episodes but likely makes no difference in the actual outcome of the pregnancy. Ditto any sort of bed rest. I've bled in every pregnancy so I know how scary it is. Thanks, I'd been looking up stuff and for some reason couldn't find anything that made me chill out quite as much as this.
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Jun 4, 2015 19:30
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I am not a doctor and I have no idea if n8r is. To the best of my recollection, the positive evidence of risk with lorazepam (and other benzos) is that it will cause your child to be born dependent if you take it often/in high enough dosages. There's also mouse studies that show an increase in cleft palate I believe. I had three different doctors affirm that, when weighed with the risk to the child of prolonged sustained anxiety and panic attacks, one-off usage of lorazepam was less risky IN MY CASE. The problem with benzos is that one-off usage often becomes regular use because it works so well so fast and is physically and psychologically addicting. I was very very lucky with my pregnancy--I was on Ativan for years before I got pregnant and stopped taking it cold turkey (FUN) when I found out I was pregnant, but my anxiety and panic disorder was practically nonexistent while pregnant. I took it twice in the 9 months. I was going to PM you so as not to be like YEAH WELL I DID IT AND MY CHILD IS FINE, but you don't have PM's. Good to hear you're talking to your doctor more about this too!
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Jun 4, 2015 22:31
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Any suggestions for a good low-flow bottle? I EBF our six-week-old, but my husband likes to give her a bottle before bed (my nipples are fans of this too). She has just started completely spitting up almost all of the pumped milk! It is incredibly frustrating since I'm never able to pump all that much. The problem is definitely too much too soon. We've tried regular Doctor Brown bottles and Avent 1 month + bottles.
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Jun 6, 2015 03:29
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We've been doing the same thing! We use medela's "Calma" bottles. She still bolts the milk down if left to her own devices since a bottle will always flow faster, but it's easier to take frequent breaks since the milk doesn't flow unless she's sucking. That really helped with the spitting up.
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Jun 6, 2015 10:00
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My mostly-breastfed baby likes Dr. Brown preemie nipples, she's 7.5 weeks. The level 1 ones are too fast for her.
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Jun 6, 2015 11:35
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Dr. Brown with preemie nipples or Tommee Tippee. Look up paced bottle feeding too (short version: keep the bottle horizontal to the ground and take frequent breaks to mimic breastfeeding).
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Jun 6, 2015 15:15
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We used the Dr Brown preemie nipples until she was like 4 months old. It was the only way to get her to eat and not dribble out all the milk.
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Jun 6, 2015 18:25
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GlyphGryph posted:Okay, hopefully my final update in this thread. I was wondering how you guys were doing! I hope your wife continues to show signs of improvement so you can finally put this whole lovely saga behind you. Glad to hear your little guy is thriving! So, this happened to us a couple weeks ago:   This is Edith. We call her Edie for short. She showed up on May 22nd after roughly 12 hours of labor at home and another 12 in the hospital. After about 10 hours of laboring in the hospital, the midwife ended up having to go in and break my water in order to give my contractions a jump start, then she was born a couple hours later. She's been pretty great and pretty life-changing. I rate the whole experience a 10/10, would conceive again.
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Jun 6, 2015 20:07
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That is the most adorably snooty newborn I've ever seen! She's out-princessing little Charlotte 
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Jun 6, 2015 20:46
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eselbaum posted:I was wondering how you guys were doing! I hope your wife continues to show signs of improvement so you can finally put this whole lovely saga behind you. Glad to hear your little guy is thriving! Good name. I'm now wondering how popular Edith/Edie will be this year.
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Jun 6, 2015 21:20
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Eselbaum, that is a severely cute baby. Congratulations!!
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Jun 7, 2015 00:14
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Did the gender reveal party last night... Lucky me. I honestly had no preference either way, both sexes are going to have their challenges and I'll just be happy with a healthy baby. The wife is a little bit more upset about the royal family using the name she wanted now that the gender matches up though. Oh well, we'll think of something else!
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Jun 7, 2015 00:14
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I think Edith/Edie is a lovely name and if I'd thought of it I might have stolen it 
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Jun 7, 2015 11:23
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Big Bug Hug posted:I think Edith/Edie is a lovely name and if I'd thought of it I might have stolen it Yeah. People around here like when we introduce Edie to folks. They do ask if she is named Edith pretty frequently.
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Jun 7, 2015 20:15
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sudont posted:when weighed with the risk to the child of prolonged sustained anxiety and panic attacks, one-off usage of lorazepam was less risky IN MY CASE. I think this is the approach my doctor was going for with me. What I've been going through has been pretty debilitating to going on with my life. Haven't been sleeping, haven't had an appetite, everything brain-wise has been a nightmare at work. I've taken half of a 1mg tablet, once. It's definitely not something I did lightly, and won't do lightly again, but as my doctor said to me, I have to consider the whole picture of my life. I'm looking into practicing some mindfulness breathing exercises, as my anxiety breathing is pretty terrible, and I've got to book in with the ob that has been recommended this week. She's hoping that planning things and removing some unknowns will help my brain out a bit too Everything is generally free here in NZ for maternity care (all my doctors appointments and prescriptions have been so far), but she's recommended I go private for my antenatal stuff due to the anxiety. My city also has a mothers and babies psychiatric help unit available if I end up needing it (TOTALLY hoping this won't be the case!)
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Jun 7, 2015 22:34
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BlueCat posted:I'm looking into practicing some mindfulness breathing exercises, as my anxiety breathing is pretty terrible, and I've got to book in with the ob that has been recommended this week. She's hoping that planning things and removing some unknowns will help my brain out a bit too I'm glad you're on track to getting better! And you did a great job by adressing this so quickly and decisively. You're being a good mum already 
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Jun 7, 2015 23:27
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Thanks for the recommendations! Oh, and here is my Marie! Edit: I'm posting on mobile so I have no idea if this huge or not!
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Jun 8, 2015 02:39
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This Tuesday we welcomed little Erik to the world. Mrs Z preformed like a champ and only needed some massage and a heatpillow to handle the pain. 
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Jun 13, 2015 09:42
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n8r posted:What's a good pregnancy book for people that don't know poo poo about being pregnant. Preferably rational / scientific based information on stuff like testing, what you can eat, how horrible of a person you are if you get an epidural - stuff like that. 'Expecting better' by Emily Oster fits the bill pretty well for this. I wish I'd read it as soon as I found out/maybe even before I got pregnant. Made me feel a lot more relaxed about the whole experience.
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Jun 15, 2015 04:07
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As of this morning, we have lost "two large chunks of mucus plug." What this means in terms of when these guys are coming, I do not know.
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Jun 15, 2015 16:18
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No Butt Stuff posted:As of this morning, we have lost "two large chunks of mucus plug." What this means in terms of when these guys are coming, I do not know. My baby dropped and my mucus plug came out the day before my water broke. I think my situation wasn't typical though and you can lose the mucus plug weeks before the babies arrive.
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Jun 15, 2015 17:03
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I think with the last one she lost the mucus plug in chunks over a couple days close to the end, but the baby went to 40 weeks and we induced. She ended up being 9 pounds. Who knows with twins. They're both probably over 5.5 pounds now. She's scheduling her induction this evening. I'm ready, so I'm sure she is too.
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Jun 15, 2015 19:31
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Anyone have much experience with IUGR? I just had my 20 week anatomy scan with this pregnancy and the baby is measuring in the 5th percentile. My OB stressed that the baby's anatomy looked great, everything was "proportional" and blood flow from the placenta and the amniotic fluid looked fine. She didn't say anything about IUGR, but it seems like that's what this could be unless baby has a miraculous growth spurt. The scan also showed a lesion on my placenta that the doctor suggested could be clotted blood from one of the small subchorionic hemorrhages I had earlier in the pregnancy, but there's no certainty there. She didn't say anything about possible chromosomal issues, just that my quad screen came back good. My OB referred me to a perinatologist for a scan and consultation in the beginning of July, but I'm not feeling very optimistic. My husband and I are not small people and our sons both measured average during my pregnancies. It doesn't seem like there's a good reason for the baby to be so tiny. They were measuring the baby as being 20 weeks gestation according to my menstrual cycle when my own estimation and a dating scan at 8 weeks puts her at 19 weeks instead, but I don't think that really improves the numbers much. After two preemies and then a miscarriage just in December, I was really hoping for a mundane pregnancy, so this is pretty scary and frustrating. It's just so early to be measuring so small if there's an issue with the placenta or something. I think my OB was trying to keep us from freaking out, but I'm sorta doing that anyway despite my best efforts.
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Jun 20, 2015 02:52
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I know it's impossible to hear, but try to remain calm. Your doctor isn't going to let you walk out of there if they think that a) there's something wrong and b) there's something they can and should do about it right now. Hang in there. I know it's scary. Wife had her final growth measurement today. One twin is 5 lbs 7 oz and they other is 5 lbs 8 oz. Induction in one week from tomorrow. Although she thinks she had *part* of a bloody show, and baby B is as low in the cervix as he can be without it actually being labor, so who knows.
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Jun 24, 2015 21:06
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So funny story. My baby is 11 weeks old. I went to the Dr. today to get back on birth control (depo). The doctor asks if I'd been sexually active, I said yes. Had I used protection? My exact words were "haha yes, do you think I'm crazy?" So they did the obligatory urine test for pregnancy. The nurse was saying as she was dripping on the stick "I don't like these ones, I've had false positives before." She took too long and I said "you're freaking me out". Yeah, positive. The doctor said to have a blood test. I'll get the results tomorrow. Nurse handwaves and says "It won't be anything." Yeah... but STILL
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Jul 3, 2015 05:02
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My wife is giving birth to our first in a couple of months and I'm concerned about handling my employment. I have several weeks of paid time off and don't intend take unpaid parental leave. I also work from home. My plan, is to give work a heads up within the next month that once the baby is born, I'll be taking the following week off to do baby bonding/duty and wife assistance. After that first week, take another week of PTO as part time and play it by ear after that. Any comments on that plan or suggestions? Also, are there any general "political" workplace sensitivities I should be aware of? My employer is fairly chill and I'm not demanding, so I don't expect a plan like the above to be a problem, but this being America, I'm bracing for any ridiculous response. If there are any "best practices" or otherwise recommendations for a father in this situation, I'd appreciate them!
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Jul 3, 2015 13:52
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It really depends on your company's work culture. I would tell your boss sooner rather than later, so you can work out a plan. And take as much time as is afforded to you. I've never heard a parent say "I had too much paternity/maternity leave." As an example, my company recently instated an 8 week paid paternity leave policy when it used to be 1. Some of my colleagues are afraid to take the entire time because they think it'll reflect poorly on them, but our CEO recently released a statement to all employees that boiled down to if we don't use the entire paternity time, we are being stupid. I fully plan on taking the entire time and my manager is definitely fine with it. I also informed him of the baby at 12 weeks so we could plan ahead, since most of the projects I work on span months/years. And if anyone's curious, maternity leave was bumped up from 12 weeks to 17 paid. I am very fortunate to be working for a company in the US that actually gives a poo poo about kids and family.
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Jul 3, 2015 15:03
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Cheesus posted:My wife is giving birth to our first in a couple of months and I'm concerned about handling my employment. My husband did 2 weeks PTO and 2 weeks of working from home. His company was very supportive and even good when we had the baby 10 days Early. I still would have loved for him to have more time off but it worked out well.
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Jul 3, 2015 15:10
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On the 4th of July, 13 days overdue, syntosinon induced, 12 hours of crazy labour, an epesiotomy and a third degree tear later, we were met with this beautiful little girl. Seeing her face for the first time on the way out was terrifying and incredible. It was like falling crazy stupidly in love in 0.3 seconds flat, it made my head spin. Such a proud Dad.
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Jul 6, 2015 11:56
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Cheesus posted:My wife is giving birth to our first in a couple of months and I'm concerned about handling my employment. You're entitled to FMLA, but it can have a financial impact. You should try to make sure you can have the first two weeks at home, as it's advised for two weeks for bonding. It'll also help your wife in a number of ways. I can't see why you wouldn't tell them now and sort out whatever planning you need now, because you don't get FMLA coverage (if you need it) overnight. You *do* want to FMLA during the weeks of vacation if you feel you may risk your job in some way, which is your call. Traditionally most employers are pretty supportive of having kids in general.
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Jul 6, 2015 14:20
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SwissDonkey posted:On the 4th of July, 13 days overdue, syntosinon induced, 12 hours of crazy labour, an epesiotomy and a third degree tear later, we were met with this beautiful little girl. Congratulations! She is so adorable, and a fun birth date too. Hope you're having fun so far! We're currently trying to introduce pumped breast milk to little Edith, who will be 7 weeks old tomorrow, and she is having none of it. She only reluctantly opens her mouth if she doesn't push the bottle away first, then she either just chews on the nipple, or gags and spits the milk out if some gets into her mouth. Dad will try a few times before giving up. We're going back to work when she's 12 weeks, so we still have some time to figure it out, but it's not going too well so far! 
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Jul 9, 2015 15:32
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eselbaum posted:Congratulations! She is so adorable, and a fun birth date too. Hope you're having fun so far! Do you know if you have the high lipase issue? Quickest way to check is to grab a bottle you expressed that is a few days old give it a quick taste yourself and see if it tastes awful (at least that is what I did and... ew). I just did it out of curiosity because thankfully Zeke apparently gives no poo poo about the horrible taste. But based on what I have read about it, he is the exception not the rule. Still, just as a hedge in case he starts caring, we've been scalding some of the pumped milk anyway which is how you stop the lipase from eating the fat and making the milk taste terrible. There are resources talking about it if you just Google high lipase breast milk.
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Jul 9, 2015 15:59
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eselbaum posted:
Just keep trying & she will probably figure out that bottles are okay. My son never really took to the bottle, but drank enough at daycare to stay satisfied. Then he ate the bulk of his calories at night.
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Jul 9, 2015 23:50
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eselbaum posted:Congratulations! She is so adorable, and a fun birth date too. Hope you're having fun so far! Thanks! The first week or so was pretty hellish, she had some bad wind issues and mum had some issues with getting her to stay latched/actually get milk. We've switched her to formula because mum's nipple couldn't take it anymore and we were losing waaay too much sleep (like, only getting 1-2 hours sleep a night :| ), and we've gotten her on some natural wind drops which are apparently based on a dill extract. Now she sleeps for 4-5 hours at a stretch and me and mum aren't at eachothers throats. Happy family!
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Jul 14, 2015 10:31
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GoreJess posted:Just keep trying & she will probably figure out that bottles are okay. This is basically what ended up happening. I had read that babies can smell their moms from, like, 20 feet away, so when my husband was initially trying to give her the bottle, she refused probably because she knew the boobs were in the next room. I left the house without her for the first time since she was born to go get my hair cut last week. I pumped a few ounces of fresh milk and told my husband good luck, and she actually seemed to tolerate it! I pumped more yesterday and she even let me feed it to her, polishing off 4 ounces in no time. Yay! Persistence paid off. SwissDonkey posted:Thanks! The first week or so was pretty hellish, she had some bad wind issues and mum had some issues with getting her to stay latched/actually get milk. We've switched her to formula because mum's nipple couldn't take it anymore and we were losing waaay too much sleep (like, only getting 1-2 hours sleep a night :| ), and we've gotten her on some natural wind drops which are apparently based on a dill extract. Now she sleeps for 4-5 hours at a stretch and me and mum aren't at eachothers throats. Happy family! Has she considered using a nipple shield? I never used one, but have heard good things about women using them until they and their babies get a bit more comfortable with nursing. I definitely would have tried one if my pain had persisted. I remember the first week or so being very frustrating. Being sleep deprived and having your nipples subjected to excruciating pain by a hungry, crying baby is a special kind of hell. The pain did go away eventually, though! I relied on a breastfeeding pillow to get the right posture/angle for a while, and that helped a lot. However, if formula is working for you, then by all means keep it up. Happy family is the most important thing!
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Jul 14, 2015 17:47
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Also for sore nipples I found just plain coconut oil to be the most help. We've had some bottle problems too but using some help/tips from the kellymom website made a difference.
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Jul 14, 2015 18:56
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