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In Predator, Hawkins' delivery of the line "I can make it Sarge" is so bad, it almost ruins the entire film.
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Jul 20, 2015 01:18
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ducttape posted:One of the old star trek novels had a plot that was basically 'the crew sits down and talks about how they dealt with the Kobayashi Maru'. In that book, the test treated the Klingon ships like they were a hydra; each ship you kill would result in two more ships warping in. In the book, Kirk hacked the Klingon ships to recognize 'James Tiberius Kirk' as the best friend a Klingon could have, and of course they will aid in the rescue mission. I always thought that novel hit on the perfect way for him to cheat that fit his personality. He programmed the Klingons to recognise him, and his defense when StarFleet called him on his obvious cheating was that he intended to cultivate such a incredible reputation during his career that the reprogrammed simulation was actually more accurate. It works because he wasn't just being a cheating little poo poo, he genuinely didn't believe the no-win scenario existed and so he and found a way out no-one had considered. Whereas the Kirk in the rebooted films is just being a cheating little poo poo who didn't care about finding an actual solution.
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Jul 20, 2015 01:27
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thespaceinvader posted:They totally underused the ghosts in general in the films. But then, I guess they had to cut a lot from some of them to make them manageable lengths. The ghosts were some of the more interesting parts of Hogwarts. But that's what they did? At the end of Azkaban they assumed it was a "powerful wizard's" patronus because it was a fully formed stag. He brings up a fully formed stag again at the beginning of OotP i think. When he saves Dudley. And later on we see a bunch of fully formed ones, like when they're practicing in the room of requirment. One of the teachers even snaps off 3 fully formed ones at once in the last movie. Cats I think.
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Jul 20, 2015 01:31
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jabby posted:I always thought that novel hit on the perfect way for him to cheat that fit his personality. He programmed the Klingons to recognise him, and his defense when StarFleet called him on his obvious cheating was that he intended to cultivate such a incredible reputation during his career that the reprogrammed simulation was actually more accurate. It works because he wasn't just being a cheating little poo poo, he genuinely didn't believe the no-win scenario existed and so he and found a way out no-one had considered. The kirk who reprogrammed the simulation so the klingons loved him was brought up by both his parents and chose starfleet as his career. The kirk who minimum-efforted the "black screen, klingons disappear" had a dead father, killed while serving in starfleet (in a no-win situation by ambush) and was raised by his mother and stepfather, had issues with authority and only entered starfleet after a bar fight. Honestly I prefer nu-kirks solution, simply because anyone who declares "I'm going to be so great that everyone will love me and recognise my name" sounds like an absolute oval office you would never get tired of punching. They are both cheating in the same way by hacking the program, at least nu-kirks method is upfront about being a cheat.
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Jul 20, 2015 01:42
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SiKboy posted:Honestly I prefer nu-kirks solution, simply because anyone who declares "I'm going to be so great that everyone will love me and recognise my name" sounds like an absolute oval office So, Captain James T. Kirk.
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Jul 20, 2015 01:49
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Nu-Kirk and Mutt Williams are cooler than Captain Kirk and Indiana Jones respectively Give em a tv show
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Jul 20, 2015 02:48
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TheFallenEvincar posted:... Mutt Williams are cooler than Captain Kirk and Indiana Jones respectively Look at this. Look at how wrong you are. Go think about where you went wrong in your life.
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Jul 20, 2015 03:04
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oldpainless posted:In Predator, Hawkins' delivery of the line "I can make it Sarge" is so bad, it almost ruins the entire film. That was Poncho, and honestly, Hawkin's pussy jokes nearly took me out of the movie.
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Jul 20, 2015 05:47
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SiKboy posted:The kirk who reprogrammed the simulation so the klingons loved him was brought up by both his parents and chose starfleet as his career. The kirk who minimum-efforted the "black screen, klingons disappear" had a dead father, killed while serving in starfleet (in a no-win situation by ambush) and was raised by his mother and stepfather, had issues with authority and only entered starfleet after a bar fight. Of course I haven't read the book but it sounds more like it should have been that the Klingons feared him and would flee.
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Jul 20, 2015 06:01
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Henchman of Santa posted:That was the original Hallelujah.
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Jul 20, 2015 07:14
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Nth Doctor posted:Look at this. Look at how wrong you are. Go think about where you went wrong in your life.   "Old Whip Man" got nothing on that He'll cut you, man
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Jul 20, 2015 07:37
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Rysithusiku posted:But that's what they did? At the end of Azkaban they assumed it was a "powerful wizard's" patronus because it was a fully formed stag. He brings up a fully formed stag again at the beginning of OotP i think. When he saves Dudley. And later on we see a bunch of fully formed ones, like when they're practicing in the room of requirment. One of the teachers even snaps off 3 fully formed ones at once in the last movie. Cats I think. I think he's referring to the big showdown in the last movie, they just do a big forcefield.
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Jul 20, 2015 10:59
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Nth Doctor posted:Look at this. Look at how wrong you are. Go think about where you went wrong in your life. Continuing it would be a start. Mind you, I didn't hate Crystal Skull as much as most people. The original trilogy were 30s pulp serial stories set in the 30s. Skull is a 50s pulp B-movie set in the 50s. Skull is weaker only because the things it's a love letter to are weaker, and because of some limp CGI and a silly fridge joke.
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Jul 20, 2015 12:29
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SiKboy posted:Honestly I prefer nu-kirks solution, simply because anyone who declares "I'm going to be so great that everyone will love me and recognise my name" sounds like an absolute oval office you would never get tired of punching. They are both cheating in the same way by hacking the program, at least nu-kirks method is upfront about being a cheat. The whole point is that Kirk has a ridiculous ego and refused to believe a situation existed that he couldn't win. It's not supposed to make him likable, it's supposed to help drive the plot of the film. His overconfidence and the fact that he has never faced a no-win scenario are pretty central themes. So yeah, he missed the point of the Kobayashi Maru when he was younger, that's the point. Nu-Kirk wasn't trying to make a point that he disagreed with the conditions of the test, he was just demonstrating that he didn't give a poo poo about his training. Yeah they are different characters, but being a bratty douchebag is arguably a less interesting character trait than a pathological refusal to accept defeat. Plus it's not like the new film uses that as a jumping off point to develop his character. He remains a bratty douchebag throughout.
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Jul 20, 2015 13:28
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My Lovely Horse posted:Oh huh, so it was. Been a while since I've seen the film and I guess I automatically assumed they would have used the Buckley version. That's part of what made the scene so bad. Leonard Cohen's voice is the anti-aphrodisiac. At least Tom Waits never did a version he could use.
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Jul 20, 2015 14:10
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jabby posted:Did you watch the directors cut? I'm pretty sure 'nothing ever ends' is in there, as well as Tales of the Black Freighter and a couple of the minor characters you talk about. The animated version of watchmen is the superior version by all accounts: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6lR35MhVMss Everybody check it if you've only seen the theatrical film. Jedit posted:Continuing it would be a start. The film would have been strictly better without Shia Lebouf. And sadly also probably Harrison Ford.  And George Lucas.Yeah lets just not do any more Indiana Jones movies. Zaphod42 has a new favorite as of 15:22 on Jul 20, 2015 |
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Jul 20, 2015 15:19
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Henchman of Santa posted:That's part of what made the scene so bad. Leonard Cohen's voice is the anti-aphrodisiac. At least Tom Waits never did a version he could use. The point of the scene was that these two people can't have sex without their latex-costumes, a boner-killing song fits right in with that. Unless you're into that kind of kink, I guess.
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Jul 20, 2015 15:34
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Henchman of Santa posted:Man of Steel was Zack Snyder. I know this was a while ago, but wiki has Nolan listed as writer and producer for Man of Steel, so he seems pretty involved. 
BuddyChrist has a new favorite as of 16:02 on Jul 20, 2015 |
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Jul 20, 2015 15:49
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I do kinda want to punch Snyder in the face for making me sit through that Hallelujah scene. I even kinda enjoy the film overall even though most people hate on it, but that one scene is just so loving uncomfortable. Just no. Should have just shown night owl and silk spectre take off in the ship and then hear them giggling or something and then cut to like Rorschach talking to the therapist instead. Worst part of that film is the tonal imbalance, I agree. Its decently accurate to the source material but then it tosses out the black freighter and instead has a bunch of superhero slow-fighting and awkward slow-sex. Cut those scenes and instead fit in some more dialogue on politics and psychology or whatever. Anyways, the motion comic rules so just pretend they never made the film and watch that instead.
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Jul 20, 2015 15:54
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The monkeys scene in crystal skull was just terrible, mostly because of the visual quality. I don't understand why anyone thinks the fridge scene is any less ridiculous than the raft-out-of-the-plane scene or the giant-propeller-out-of-the-water scene. Survival of Insanely low probability scenarios is pretty much Indy's thing! That being said, it was the weakest Indy movie and the ending was terrible and rushed, but that's not an irrational irritation, I don't think.
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Jul 20, 2015 17:27
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Rysithusiku posted:But that's what they did? At the end of Azkaban they assumed it was a "powerful wizard's" patronus because it was a fully formed stag. He brings up a fully formed stag again at the beginning of OotP i think. When he saves Dudley. And later on we see a bunch of fully formed ones, like when they're practicing in the room of requirment. One of the teachers even snaps off 3 fully formed ones at once in the last movie. Cats I think. In the scene I'm thinking of (and any where they're actually used in a fight) they're just glowing forcefieldy things https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RezjC4jdbTU There's no explanation in the film for WHY Harry thinks it was his dad doing this. They do show up in the book form a few times, and a lot more in the later books, but they were the climactic thing in PoA and their appearance in the movie is just boring.
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Jul 20, 2015 18:19
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Trent posted:The monkeys scene in crystal skull was just terrible, mostly because of the visual quality. I don't understand why anyone thinks the fridge scene is any less ridiculous than the raft-out-of-the-plane scene or the giant-propeller-out-of-the-water scene. Survival of Insanely low probability scenarios is pretty much Indy's thing! Its not about survival in the face of insurmountable odds. That is indeed Indy's schtick. But surviving a literal nuke in a literal refrigerator is just jumping the shark. Its too much, too unbelievable, and too silly. If that had happened during the last crusade it would have been bad enough, but jumping the shark in a series reboot 19 years after the last film is just a huge fuckup. Tomb Raider is a better film than Crystal Skull.
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Jul 20, 2015 18:22
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To be fair, Tomb Raider is basically the second best Indiana Jones movie after Temple of Doom
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Jul 20, 2015 18:25
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TheFallenEvincar posted:To be fair, Tomb Raider is basically the second best Indiana Jones movie after Temple of Doom To be fair, you're wrong about literally everything. I wouldn't trust you to be right if you told me your name.
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Jul 20, 2015 19:28
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Trent posted:The monkeys scene in crystal skull was just terrible, mostly because of the visual quality. I don't understand why anyone thinks the fridge scene is any less ridiculous than the raft-out-of-the-plane scene or the giant-propeller-out-of-the-water scene. Survival of Insanely low probability scenarios is pretty much Indy's thing! Because in the visual context of Temple of Doom you "can" survive it. Yes I know in real life you would hit the ground too hard anyway but it still looks like it could possibly work. Hence suspension of disbelief. The fridge scene was him inside a metal box getting thrown around at about 100mph and coming out completely unscathed. You just die from that, theres no "oh maybe". The real issue is that Crystal Skull was just a disjointed mess and a really nonsensical and boring story, not a single scene that could have been forgotten or even just handled a little better.
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Jul 20, 2015 19:49
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Zaphod42 posted:Its not about survival in the face of insurmountable odds. That is indeed Indy's schtick. I remember an article where they interviewed some scientists and they said that if all you needed to survive was the shockwave one of those old 50's refrigerators would actually be a decent bet. What would really kill him was being thrown miles down range while in said fridge, he'd be goo when the door opened. Pook Good Mook has a new favorite as of 19:58 on Jul 20, 2015 |
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Jul 20, 2015 19:51
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Jedit posted:To be fair, you're wrong about literally everything. I wouldn't trust you to be right if you told me your name. I'M just not a fan of Nazis
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Jul 20, 2015 19:53
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TheFallenEvincar posted:I'M just not a fan of Nazis
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Jul 20, 2015 19:54
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Nutsngum posted:Because in the visual context of Temple of Doom you "can" survive it. Yes I know in real life you would hit the ground too hard anyway but it still looks like it could possibly work. Hence suspension of disbelief. Yeah, just on screen they make the raft float down slow enough that it's fine. That fridge gets launched though, then tumbles all over.
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Jul 20, 2015 19:58
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AFewBricksShy posted:Neither was Indy. Did you see the movies? No Nazis in my movies, thank you. That's why I've never seen Schindler's List. Is just personal preference. edit: I'm taking a stand against Nazis right here right now. I just don't like Nazis, sorry. It's why the History Channel sucks man Punkin Spunkin has a new favorite as of 20:00 on Jul 20, 2015 |
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Jul 20, 2015 19:58
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TheFallenEvincar posted:I'd rather not have any Nazi fetishism in my movies whether it's blonde Aryan seductresses or just getting off on fighting Nazis. If you close your eyes hard enough and stick your fingers in your ears it's like Nazi will have never existed, man.
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Jul 20, 2015 20:36
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I have a really irrational dislike of Nazis. It's the thread. I'm boycotting nazis vvvvvvv Punkin Spunkin has a new favorite as of 20:43 on Jul 20, 2015 |
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Jul 20, 2015 20:40
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TheFallenEvincar posted:I have a really irrational dislike of Nazis. It's the thread. Disliking Nazis isn't irrational. Refusing to watch any movie that contains Nazis in any way, shape or form, is.
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Jul 20, 2015 20:42
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What happens when someone pranks you by linked a Downfall parody?
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Jul 20, 2015 20:49
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AFewBricksShy posted:Neither was Indy. Did you see the movies? The line "Nazis, I hate these guys" always bugged me. I mean, Nazis are just the loving worst, but it sounds like someone talking about a particularly annoying video game enemy.
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Jul 20, 2015 21:20
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Dr Christmas posted:The line "Nazis, I hate these guys" always bugged me. I mean, Nazis are just the loving worst, but it sounds like someone talking about a particularly annoying video game enemy.  I mean not literal video game enemies but, making light of them was the whole point. Its a joke.
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Jul 20, 2015 21:43
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Armyman25 posted:That was Poncho, and honestly, Hawkin's pussy jokes nearly took me out of the movie. Here's the thing about Predator. Hawkins' jokes are one of the most obvious bits of subtext in the entire film. As a response to Alien, which was a Giger dickmonster taken down by a woman, Predator has a horrifying clawed vagina for a mouth and the movie is full of super-macho tough guys who bond over their muscles and pussy jokes and have to mow down a whole patch of jungle when they get spooked by something they don't understand to prove whose dick is bigger. Finally at the end, the survivors are the only woman in the story, and the most macho of the macho men (action icon Arnold, surviving above even Apollo Creed and Jesse 'The Body' Ventura), who finally conquers the vaginaface while still understanding nothing about it.
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Jul 20, 2015 23:17
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Bonk posted:Here's the thing about Predator. Hawkins' jokes are one of the most obvious bits of subtext in the entire film. As a response to Alien, which was a Giger dickmonster taken down by a woman, Predator has a horrifying clawed vagina for a mouth and the movie is full of super-macho tough guys who bond over their muscles and pussy jokes and have to mow down a whole patch of jungle when they get spooked by something they don't understand to prove whose dick is bigger. Finally at the end, the survivors are the only woman in the story, and the most macho of the macho men (action icon Arnold, surviving above even Apollo Creed and Jesse 'The Body' Ventura), who finally conquers the vaginaface while still understanding nothing about it. Space pussy? Cover yourself in mud until you can light up that nuclear hand job. Hit it and quit it.
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Jul 20, 2015 23:22
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Bonk posted:Here's the thing about Predator. Hawkins' jokes are one of the most obvious bits of subtext in the entire film. As a response to Alien, which was a Giger dickmonster taken down by a woman, Predator has a horrifying clawed vagina for a mouth and the movie is full of super-macho tough guys who bond over their muscles and pussy jokes and have to mow down a whole patch of jungle when they get spooked by something they don't understand to prove whose dick is bigger. Finally at the end, the survivors are the only woman in the story, and the most macho of the macho men (action icon Arnold, surviving above even Apollo Creed and Jesse 'The Body' Ventura), who finally conquers the vaginaface while still understanding nothing about it. 
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Jul 21, 2015 00:16
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Bonk posted:Here's the thing about Predator. Hawkins' jokes are one of the most obvious bits of subtext in the entire film. As a response to Alien, which was a Giger dickmonster taken down by a woman, Predator has a horrifying clawed vagina for a mouth and the movie is full of super-macho tough guys who bond over their muscles and pussy jokes and have to mow down a whole patch of jungle when they get spooked by something they don't understand to prove whose dick is bigger. Finally at the end, the survivors are the only woman in the story, and the most macho of the macho men (action icon Arnold, surviving above even Apollo Creed and Jesse 'The Body' Ventura), who finally conquers the vaginaface while still understanding nothing about it. Holy poo poo. Did SMG get a new user name? You're reading an awful lot of probably unintentional subtext into movies about monsters.
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Jul 21, 2015 00:18
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