Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Post
  • Reply
Your Boy Fancy
Feb 7, 2003

by Cyrano4747
All Airlines Are Overpriced Trashmongers

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Lord of Garbagemen
Jan 28, 2014

Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!

Your Boy Fancy posted:

All Airlines Are Overpriced Trashmongers

Yes op, you rang?

Your Boy Fancy
Feb 7, 2003

by Cyrano4747

Lord of Garbagemen posted:

Yes op, you rang?

Yes, Please Stop Being Overpriced Trash

THATCHER BRAINWASH
Mar 28, 2015

by Cowcaster
Hello is Sepp Blatter dead yet?

porkface
Dec 29, 2000

THATCHER BRAINWASH posted:

Hello is Sepp Blatter dead yet?

Yes he was replaced 7 years ago by Corruption Bot 3000

Sneaks McDevious
Jul 29, 2010

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN
Was it posted here yet that Warner's extradition papers arrived. Only 5 years before that's all thrashed out lmao

Crazy Ted
Jul 29, 2003

julian assflange posted:

Was it posted here yet that Warner's extradition papers arrived. Only 5 years before that's all thrashed out lmao
In the meantime, Sepp Blatter is going to Russia for a friendly visit.

stickyfngrdboy
Oct 21, 2010
Ken Bates, who you will definitely all know as an honest, incorruptible former football club chairman who has never offered bribes and has always paid his fair share of taxes, has offered Sepp Blatter, who is also an honest and incorruptible gentleman involved in the sport of foot, a job on Yorkshire Radio.

quote:

Speaking during a weekly interview with former Leeds United chairman Ken Bates, director of broadcasting at Radio Yorkshire Sam Brydges confirmed the offer. He said: “We would like to offer Sepp Blatter a work placement opportunity here at Radio Yorkshire next summer, when his commitments at FIFA have ceased, to get a good snapshot of the industry.

“If he is serious about wanting to be a radio journalist, then there is not a more serious place to learn than here at Radio Yorkshire.”

Bates added: “What you are offering is a job placement opportunity for two weeks, here, at Elland Road and he can find out how to be a proper broadcaster, and perhaps how to answer questions and commentate clearly and openly without confusing the audience.

“I believe Sam has even generously offered to provide him with accommodation in case he can’t afford to pay for his own for the two weeks in Leeds.

“When he returns to Zurich he can be the European commentator on the European political scene. I think it’s a very generous offer on your part, Sam, and I think Mr Blatter would be very wise to take it up.”

Shit Farm
Jan 10, 2013
i love ken bates

4 inch cut no femmes
May 31, 2011
“I think people like Mr Blatter or the heads of big international sporting federations, or the Olympic Games, deserve special recognition. If there is anyone who deserves the Nobel prize, it’s those people.”
/
Vladimir Putin

Teketeketeketeke
Mar 11, 2007


Humphrey Vasel posted:

“I think people like Mr Blatter or the heads of big international sporting federations, or the Olympic Games, deserve special recognition. If there is anyone who deserves the Nobel prize, it’s those people.”
/
Vladimir Putin

Came here to post the article...

http://www.cnn.com/2015/07/28/football/vladimir-putin-sepp-blatter-fifa-nobel-prize/index.html

"Sepp Blatter deserves Nobel Prize for FIFA work, Russia's Vladimir Putin says"

brocked
Oct 25, 2005

All shall love me and despair!

Teketeketeketeke posted:

Came here to post the article...

http://www.cnn.com/2015/07/28/football/vladimir-putin-sepp-blatter-fifa-nobel-prize/index.html

"Sepp Blatter deserves Nobel Prize for FIFA work, Russia's Vladimir Putin says"

Too bad Yasser Arafat isn't around to weigh in as well

dex_sda
Oct 11, 2012


In what, Economic Sciences?

Lutha Mahtin
Oct 10, 2010

Your brokebrain sin is absolved...go and shitpost no more!

is there a nobel prize for theater?

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
Blatter deserves a Nobel Peace Prize for uniting the whole world in hatred of FIFA and making everyone love America again.

Akileese
Feb 6, 2005

Platini is going to run for FIFA President and the English FA has backed him. That'll seal his fate I suppose.

Kurtofan
Feb 16, 2011

hon hon hon

Akileese posted:

Platini is going to run for FIFA President and the English FA has backed him. That'll seal his fate I suppose.

L'Entente Cordiale going strong.

Rated PG-34
Jul 1, 2004




They should at least give him the ig nobel peace prize

Mr. Mambold
Feb 13, 2011

Aha. Nice post.



Teketeketeketeke posted:

Came here to post the article...

http://www.cnn.com/2015/07/28/football/vladimir-putin-sepp-blatter-fifa-nobel-prize/index.html

"Sepp Blatter deserves Nobel Prize for FIFA work, Russia's Vladimir Putin says"

Hell, Vlad, why don''t you just buy the loving Nobel Prize and give it to him then? Huh, big mouth?

ayb
Sep 12, 2003
Kills Drifters for erections
Blatter deserves a Nobel peace prize for this

http://www.si.com/longform/2015/mls/index.html?xid=si_social

quote:

I remember a meeting between Alan and Sepp Blatter. Alan did his whole song and dance about bigger goals, which would lead to more scoring. Human beings—goalkeepers in particular—had gotten bigger and bigger over the years, making scoring much harder. And Sepp Blatter just looked at him like, ‘Everyone across the world would have to buy new goals; do you realize what you are contemplating?’ He was just shaking his head.

Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer
The economic nobel prize was a good suggestion. FIFA make obscene amounts of money and governments suspend their tax laws for FIFA

Kurtofan
Feb 16, 2011

hon hon hon
the economic prize is a fake nobel prize leeching off the name by calling itself "prize in memory of alfred nobel" so it would be fitting.

Toplowtech
Aug 31, 2004

Kurtofan posted:

the economic prize is a fake nobel prize leeching off the name by calling itself "prize in memory of alfred nobel" so it would be fitting.
The man made a fortune selling dynamite, cannons and other armaments. The nobel prize of Econmony should really be the only prize with his name on it really.

sticksy
May 26, 2004
Nap Ghost
This is pretty cool and good:

http://www.espnfc.com/blog/the-toe-poke/65/post/2540572/fifa-corruption-exhibition-set-to-open-in-las-vegas

quote:

With FIFA well and truly making an exhibition of themselves over the past few months, it's only natural that world football's governing body and the corruption scandal in which it is currently situated be turned into a museum piece in its own right.

As such, a permanent display entitled "The Beautiful Game Turns Ugly" is now due to open, rather fittingly, at the National Museum of Organized Crime and Law Enforcement -- otherwise known as The Mob Museum -- in Las Vegas.

Opening on the first day of September, the exhibition will feature photos and media snippets centred around the myriad web of accusations, counter-accusations, bribery, racketeering and other related miscellaneous scandal currently enveloping Sepp Blatter's hierarchy.

I'd love to see the diorama of Chuck Blazer's cat apartment, Jack Warner's development academy/Haitian relief efforts ("Exhibit under construction") and Qatar slave deaths that'd end up looking like the Terracota Army.

jyrka
Jan 21, 2005


Potato Count: 2 small potatoes
This is a good interview with Jonathan Wilson about FIFA:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QOJWBsbSbes

He seems to be knowledgeable and non-hysterical.

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

quote:

Chung Mong-joon, one of the most influential figures in Asian football, has ridiculed Sepp Blatter after announcing that he will enter the race to replace the Swiss as president of Fifa.

A former Fifa vice-president, the South Korean Chung described Blatter as “like a cannibal eating his parents and then crying like he’s an orphan” for trying to avoid responsibility for the crisis that has engulfed Fifa over the last few months. “He tries to blame everybody except himself,” Chung added.

http://www.theguardian.com/football/2015/jul/30/chung-mong-joon-sepp-blatter-president-fifa

MoPZiG
Jun 6, 2006

thats a great campaign slogan. He's got the vote of mopzig FA.

TheBigAristotle
Feb 8, 2007

I'm tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money.
I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok.

Grimey Drawer
I had no idea where to post this, it has fraud in the title, so I'll go with the FIFA corruption thread, because why not

Football's age fraud: FIFA probes player with 'four birthdays'

"Mbemba was registered by his two first Congolese clubs as being born in 1988, according to documents obtained by CNN. Yet for a Cup of Nations qualifier in June 2011, his year of birth was listed as November 30, 1991. Meanwhile, the birth date recorded by his Belgian club Anderlecht is August 8, 1994. Just to complicate matters, Mbemba himself, thinks he was born in 1990."

This sentence reads especially well:

"European clubs generally regard African players as athletically and technically gifted. Arguably just as importantly they are relatively cheap to buy, with the added potential that clubs can make a large profit if they are sold in the future."

:ughh:

Bobby Digital
Sep 4, 2009
Is there a Chancel he just doesn't Mbemba his actual birthday?

porkface
Dec 29, 2000

Bobby Digital posted:

Is there a Chancel he just doesn't Mbemba his actual birthday?

He was there, I don't see why not.

Lutha Mahtin
Oct 10, 2010

Your brokebrain sin is absolved...go and shitpost no more!

TheBigAristotle posted:

This sentence reads especially well:

"European clubs generally regard African players as athletically and technically gifted. Arguably just as importantly they are relatively cheap to buy, with the added potential that clubs can make a large profit if they are sold in the future."

:ughh:

do they give African players 3/5 of a vote in the players' union too?

White Noise Marine
Apr 14, 2010

TheBigAristotle posted:

I had no idea where to post this, it has fraud in the title, so I'll go with the FIFA corruption thread, because why not

Football's age fraud: FIFA probes player with 'four birthdays'

"Mbemba was registered by his two first Congolese clubs as being born in 1988, according to documents obtained by CNN. Yet for a Cup of Nations qualifier in June 2011, his year of birth was listed as November 30, 1991. Meanwhile, the birth date recorded by his Belgian club Anderlecht is August 8, 1994. Just to complicate matters, Mbemba himself, thinks he was born in 1990."

This sentence reads especially well:

"European clubs generally regard African players as athletically and technically gifted. Arguably just as importantly they are relatively cheap to buy, with the added potential that clubs can make a large profit if they are sold in the future."

:ughh:

The transfer thread, since newcastle just signed this guy.

trem_two
Oct 22, 2002

it is better if you keep saying I'm fat, as I will continue to score goals
Fun Shoe
Reuters have reported that noted good name haver Tokyo Sexwale is about to announce his candidacy for Blatter's position.

Blue Star Error
Jun 11, 2001

For this recipie you will need:
Football match (Halftime of), Celebrity Owner (Motivational speaking of), Sherry (Bottle of)

quote:

European football's governing body Uefa has complained to Fifa about an "alleged smear campaign" against its president Michel Platini.

Uefa has asked world football's governing body to explain the apparent distribution from their headquarters of a document entitled 'Platini: Skeletons in the closet'.

It was sent anonymously to several newspapers, reports Welt am Sonntag.

Platini is running to succeed Sepp Blatter as Fifa president.

The election is due to take place in February, with former Fifa vice-president Chung Mong-joon of South Korea, ex-Brazil player Zico and Liberian FA chairman Musa Bility having also said they will stand.

"The document, seen by BBC Sport, is entitled 'Platini: Skeletons in the Closet' and paints an unflattering picture of Michel Platini, asking whether he is suitable to replace Sepp Blatter as Fifa's president.

"The 1400-word article asks: 'He [Platini] was one of Europe's most skilful players of all time. But is he great enough to be Fifa president? Anyone taking one look in the direction of Qatar can have only one answer: no.'

"Platini is the only member of Fifa's executive committee to admit voting for Qatar's controversial 2022 World Cup bid."

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/33951764

Maybe he shouldn't have accepted Qatars bribes if he didn't want them brought up the oval office

Toplowtech
Aug 31, 2004

Blue Star Error posted:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/33951764

Maybe he shouldn't have accepted Qatars bribes if he didn't want them brought up the oval office
if i remember correctly Platini was originally opposed to Qatar hosting the game until Sarkozy forced him to change his tune over Qatar investing money into the PSG.

TheBigAristotle
Feb 8, 2007

I'm tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money.
I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok.

Grimey Drawer
He's the only one to admit voting for Qatar, clearly he can't be trusted to keep a secret

Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer
I definitely trust the head of the liberian FA to clean up FIFA

Dravs
Mar 8, 2011

You've done well, kiddo.
Platini is a massive thieving oval office, but at least he is our massive thieving oval office.

Sneaks McDevious
Jul 29, 2010

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN
Hopefully the UEFA conference and its franchises will get adequate representation with Platini as commissioner. He gets my vote!

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Crazy Ted
Jul 29, 2003

Apparently Sepp complained in an interview the other day that FIFA is being treated "seemingly like the Mafia" by the United States justice department.

Boy if only someone sat him down and told him that FIFA is being treated exactly like the Mafia by the United States justice department.

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply