tech bubble: Make someone ugly cry. Adobe can help.

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > tech bubble: Make someone ugly cry. Adobe can help.

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H.P. Hovercraft: Jan 12, 2004; one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse; Slippery Tilde

Condiv posted:

safe rider fee

like & share if you laff every tiem

# ? Aug 5, 2015 01:08

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 21, 2024 20:00

Pinterest Mom: Jun 9, 2009

At least four men ticketed by Los Angeles International Airport police while driving for Uber�s low-cost car service have criminal convictions that would bar them from operating a taxi in Los Angeles, records show.

The drivers have been convicted of child exploitation, identity theft, manslaughter and driving under the influence, according to court records. Each offense would make them ineligible for a Los Angeles taxi permit.

The criminal histories recently came to light when a representative of the taxi industry presented a city official with a binder containing citations and court records for eight Uber drivers who were cited for minor violations at the airport over the last 18 months. The Times obtained a copy and independently confirmed that the records were accurate.

One Uber driver ticketed at LAX was convicted of 14 counts of felony identity theft in 2012. Under the terms of his five-year probation, he cannot have access to any �personal identifying information,� including credit cards and debit cards, according to court records. All Uber passengers are required to pay with a credit or debit card.

Another driver was convicted of voluntary manslaughter in 1998 and sentenced to 25 years in prison. Parole records show he was released last year. That conviction would not necessarily bar him from driving for Uber, but it would make it difficult, if not impossible, to get a taxi permit.

# ? Aug 5, 2015 01:33

syscall girl: Nov 7, 2009; by FactsAreUseless; Fun Shoe

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

like & share if you laff every tiem

for some reason it reminds of flight insurance for nervous/math deficient pax

it should cover the cost of my burial expenses at least

# ? Aug 5, 2015 01:50

Stringent: Dec 22, 2004; image text goes here

crusader_complex posted:

http://www.washingtonpost.com/polit...c1f7_story.html

uber is basically a PAC for their employment model. lobbyists and lawyers cant be cheap.

quote:

Far from being intimidated, Uber was ready to fight back. The company immediately called on one of its most potent weapons: its �ever-growing list of smartphone-wielding customers. A notice sent to Uber users in Virginia included the e-mail address and phone number of the ordinarily low-profile official in charge of the decision. The notice instructed the company�s supporters to demand that the DMV �stand up for you.�

I wonder if it's occurred to the people at Uber that if they can do this so can anyone else? This tactic, more than anything else they've done previously, is really letting the genie out of the bottle. They've shown people how this whole mobile app thing can, essentially, buy votes. It's going to be interesting to see how it develops. Given how seldom it is that the good guys win, I can only assume it's going to end extremely badly.

# ? Aug 5, 2015 01:58

bassguitarhero: Feb 29, 2008

uber's probably raiding AARP because everybody else has figured out their scam and they're losing poo poo tons of drivers

that's my guess at least

# ? Aug 5, 2015 02:09

FAT32 SHAMER: Aug 16, 2012

bobbilljim posted:

I made a whole thread the other day to try and troll you fuckers about "engineer" and nobody came

but sure lets have the same ol wankery again in this thread :reallymad: :superangry:

Put some effort into your posting, you aren't being charged by the letter.

# ? Aug 5, 2015 02:14

MickeyFinn: May 8, 2007; Biggie Smalls and Junior Mafia some mark ass bitches

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

i'm a data scientist

*rubs cheeto dust onto lab coat from amazon*

As someone who just started looking in to data science, it seems like these jobs are all about running sklearn routines as quickly as possible. Is that about right?

# ? Aug 5, 2015 02:28

Hed: Mar 31, 2004; Fun Shoe

Stringent posted:

works for caltrans

# ? Aug 5, 2015 02:38

Stringent: Dec 22, 2004; image text goes here

This whole thing of fellating engineers in here is pretty funny to me. Engineering of any sort is exactly as rigorous as the regulations, standards and enforcement surrounding it. Read the latest story about critical infrastructure collapsing in China or wherever if you don't think so.

I admittedly know nothing about civil engineering, but since we've been building bridges and sewers for 3,000 odd years I'm guessing that, compared to writing software at least, a lot of the harder problems have proven solutions and it's mainly a matter of working within a budget and a regulatory framework. I realise that requires an extreme attention to detail and a lot of domain knowledge, but so does accounting or law or lots of other professions.

This notion people seem to have that engineers are all Ozzie Nelson would be better directed toward the regulators that oversee them, shouldn't it?

# ? Aug 5, 2015 02:43

Chris Knight: Jun 5, 2002; me @ ur posts; Fun Shoe

Condiv posted:

When taking a long scenic drive or getting away camping for the weekend, one guarantee aside from the picturesque views and camp side tranquility is that you, or one of your fellow adventurers are going to need to answer a call of nature at a most inappropriate time � i.e. in the car in the middle of nowhere or halfway through a forest hike. Well gone are the days of the �phantom squat� or ducking behind a tree and hoping not to be stumbled on by a family of tourists. This nifty invention known rather fittingly as the Bumper Dumper, is literally a toilet seat attached to a steel frame that requires only a trailer hitch receiver to turn the back of your vehicle into a veritable port-a-potty making the whole �roughing it� experience far more palatable.

they had that on top gear a few years ago

# ? Aug 5, 2015 02:44

Shaggar: Apr 26, 2006

bassguitarhero posted:

uber's probably raiding AARP because everybody else has figured out their scam and they're losing poo poo tons of drivers

that's my guess at least

yeah aarps scam is great and its worth getting on board with

# ? Aug 5, 2015 04:21

fart simpson: Jul 2, 2005; DEATH TO AMERICA

Stringent posted:

This whole thing of fellating engineers in here is pretty funny to me. Engineering of any sort is exactly as rigorous as the regulations, standards and enforcement surrounding it. Read the latest story about critical infrastructure collapsing in China or wherever if you don't think so.

I admittedly know nothing about civil engineering, but since we've been building bridges and sewers for 3,000 odd years I'm guessing that, compared to writing software at least, a lot of the harder problems have proven solutions and it's mainly a matter of working within a budget and a regulatory framework. I realise that requires an extreme attention to detail and a lot of domain knowledge, but so does accounting or law or lots of other professions.

This notion people seem to have that engineers are all Ozzie Nelson would be better directed toward the regulators that oversee them, shouldn't it?

source youre quotes

# ? Aug 5, 2015 04:22

Stringent: Dec 22, 2004; image text goes here

fart simpson posted:

source youre quotes

thank you, i thought i was going to have to post that myself

# ? Aug 5, 2015 04:24

FMguru: Sep 10, 2003; peed on;
sexually

Chris Knight posted:

they had that on top gear a few years ago

an ugly, clunky object that channels and spews poo poo?

thats jeremy clarkson

# ? Aug 5, 2015 04:32

Main Paineframe: Oct 27, 2010

Condiv posted:

wtf is wrong with uber

apparently a lot of lonely old people like driving for uber. they don't care about the poo poo pay because they're already set for retirement, they just want something to get then out of their empty house and force people to talk to them

# ? Aug 5, 2015 04:38

syscall girl: Nov 7, 2009; by FactsAreUseless; Fun Shoe

Main Paineframe posted:

apparently a lot of lonely old people like driving for uber. they don't care about the poo poo pay because they're already set for retirement, they just want something to get then out of their empty house and force people to talk to them

totes makes sense

and these aarp people aren't "cute little old grannies" they're baby boomers

in 5-7 years my parents will make the cutoff

# ? Aug 5, 2015 04:50

Greatbacon: Apr 9, 2012; by Pragmatica

Probably the only thing keeping my dad from driving for Uber is a lovely "middle class" car coupled with a fear of modern technology.

The man has a landline, a burner flipphone, a laptop w/ Windows 8 ( :chanpop:

), and no internet :smh: slash rofl

But....... say what you will about old people, they fuckken love to talk.

# ? Aug 5, 2015 04:59

computer parts: Nov 18, 2010; PLEASE CLAP

syscall girl posted:

totes makes sense

and these aarp people aren't "cute little old grannies" they're baby boomers

in 5-7 years my parents will make the cutoff

my boomer aunt is a great-grandma

# ? Aug 5, 2015 05:05

Shifty Pony: Dec 28, 2004; Up ta somethin'

Main Paineframe posted:

apparently a lot of lonely old people like driving for uber. they don't care about the poo poo pay because they're already set for retirement, they just want something to get then out of their empty house and force people to talk to them

a guy at the end of my street does this. he's a night owl and clears maintenance+fuel costs easily plus gets a bit in his pocket. nowhere near enough to live on but he has SS and retirement money taking care of that so it is all spending money.

uber might want to watch out though. nothing kills the cool vibe quite like old people.

# ? Aug 5, 2015 05:18

ultramiraculous: Nov 12, 2003; "No..."; Grimey Drawer

Pinterest Mom posted:

One Uber driver ticketed at LAX was convicted of 14 counts of felony identity theft in 2012. Under the terms of his five-year probation, he cannot have access to any �personal identifying information,� including credit cards and debit cards, according to court records. All Uber passengers are required to pay with a credit or debit card.

honestly...this one is kinda reaching unless he's hacking uber while he drives.

(the driver app may be so poo poo that who knows if he is)

# ? Aug 5, 2015 05:21

ultramiraculous: Nov 12, 2003; "No..."; Grimey Drawer

Stringent posted:

I wonder if it's occurred to the people at Uber that if they can do this so can anyone else? This tactic, more than anything else they've done previously, is really letting the genie out of the bottle. They've shown people how this whole mobile app thing can, essentially, buy votes. It's going to be interesting to see how it develops. Given how seldom it is that the good guys win, I can only assume it's going to end extremely badly.

jezum cripes. this is so out of line, you'd hope the uber local office there got fired/a stern talking to. i mean you gotta save the doxxing for home office rite :smuggo:

# ? Aug 5, 2015 05:23

Agile Vector: May 21, 2007; scrum bored

Shifty Pony posted:

�he has SS and retirement money�

geez i thought they extradited all of those guys and tried them

# ? Aug 5, 2015 05:31

ultramiraculous: Nov 12, 2003; "No..."; Grimey Drawer

PROJECT PAPERCLIP LOOK IT UP

# ? Aug 5, 2015 05:37

H.P. Hovercraft: Jan 12, 2004; one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse; Slippery Tilde

Greatbacon posted:

But....... say what you will about old people, they fuckken love to talk.

i love taxi drivers b/c they shut the gently caress up and pay attention to the goddamn road

passenger's bill of rights keeps them off of the phone and the radio on mute too

poo poo yeah

# ? Aug 5, 2015 06:12

H.P. Hovercraft: Jan 12, 2004; one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse; Slippery Tilde

Shifty Pony posted:

clears maintenance+fuel costs easily plus gets a bit in his pocket

i can't wait to retire and risk getting carjacked in my oldie old purple or gold car every single night for that sweet sweet jitney cab skrilla

hopefully my hands won't be too arthritic to nervously clutch my sig holstered between the driver's door and my spare hemorrhoid pillow

# ? Aug 5, 2015 06:15

WithoutTheFezOn: Aug 28, 2005; Oh no

syscall girl posted:

and these aarp people aren't "cute little old grannies" they're baby boomers

in 5-7 years my parents will make the cutoff

Your parents are 43 and 45?

Go get your diaper changed.

# ? Aug 5, 2015 06:45

H.P. Hovercraft: Jan 12, 2004; one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse; Slippery Tilde

WithoutTheFezOn posted:

Your parents are 43 and 45?

Go get your diaper changed.

in hs a buddy of mine had the hottest mom

turned out she had him when she was like 15

# ? Aug 5, 2015 06:49

jetz0r: May 10, 2003; Tomorrow, our nation will sit on the throne of the world. This is not a figment of the imagination, but a fact. Tomorrow we will lead the world, Allah willing.

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

in hs a buddy of mine had the hottest mom

turned out she had him when she was like 15

what's microwave like irl?

# ? Aug 5, 2015 07:34

H.P. Hovercraft: Jan 12, 2004; one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse; Slippery Tilde

jetz0r posted:

what's microwave like irl?

her hair smells nice and her husband is never around to shop for tight jeans w/ her

# ? Aug 5, 2015 09:04

Mr. Apollo: Nov 8, 2000

http://time.com/3984957/independent-contractor-versus-employee-startups/

quote:

Why Startups Are Making the Expensive Switch to Traditional Employment

After a while you realize that some of the trade-offs you were making weren�t really good trade-offs

On-demand valet service Luxe announced Tuesday that they were expanding to an eighth city, Philadelphia�but that news was quickly eclipsed by a press release that went out about two hours later: the company announced that the hundreds of workers who run around cities like Philadelphia in bright blue Luxe jackets, picking up and delivering people�s cars wherever users are, will all be converted from independent contractors to traditional employees.

That�s a move that will cost Luxe, as well as other hot startups that are reverting to doing things the old-fashioned way (at least in part) amid a mess of lawsuits over the status of workers in the on-demand economy. But they stand to gain a lot in return.

Many Silicon Valley companies have followed in Uber�s tracks and developed business models that assume their armies of workers will be treated as contractors. While the brass can�t legally tell contractors when to be on the clock, how to do their job or what to wear, they also don�t have to pay them overtime or guarantee them minimum wage or remit payroll taxes. The savings for companies is huge�probably in the billions per year for a business like Uber.

But while traditional employees cost more, employers get to exercise far more control over them, telling them precisely what to do and how to do it and, for that matter, in what color and style of outfit.

�It has to do with controlling the user experience,� says Luxe CEO Curtis Lee of why they are �making the switch� two years after the service started in San Francsico.� After a while you realize that some of the trade-offs you were making weren�t really good trade-offs.�

Under the contractor model, Lee says, the leaders at Luxe hadn�t been able to schedule workers for unpopular hours like late nights on Friday and Saturday; they could only bribe them to come online with higher rates of pay, as Uber does with surge pricing. They couldn�t provide thorough training or demand that they be considerate of other valets. �Now we can actually say, �Hey, you need to address the customer in a certain manner,'� Lee says.

Kevin Gibbon, CEO of San Francisco-based Shyp, says they made the same change earlier this summer because they wanted more �quality control� over couriers responding to on-demand shipping orders. Sometimes the closest courier wouldn�t feel like doing a job, so users would be left waiting for a more willing courier who was 30 minutes away. Other times couriers would respond to a request and then refuse to take whatever the user wanted to ship, perhaps because it was too unwieldy. Under a contractor model, there wasn�t much they could do about that. �As a contractor you have the right to accept or reject a job,� Gibbon says. As employees, part of the job description can include accepting all requests.

As an employer, Shyp will have to reimburse employees for job-related expenses like gas and car maintenance. Managers will have to make sure workers are taking breaks. Yet Gibbon hopes that they�ll also get more loyalty from couriers, who will feel more attachment to the company and will be more likely to stick around�saving Shyp from onboarding someone new and gaining them the productivity of a more experienced courier. People who want more a career path and less of a temporary gig might be attracted to working for them instead of dozens of other startups, he says.

Both Gibbon and Lee deny that the slew of worker-status suits against companies like Uber, Lyft and delivery company Postmates have anything to do with their decisions to abandon the contractor model. But plenty of startups may look at a company like Homejoy and see a cautionary tale. The on-demand cleaning service recently put up its mop for good, saying the �deciding factor� was four lawsuits it was fighting over worker classification.

One of the companies fighting a class-action suit is Instacart, a rapidly growing $2-billion startup that facilitates on-demand grocery delivery. When the business started, most of their contractors were both shopping for groceries and then delivering them, but over time those jobs have split. While some workers still do both jobs, many either spend all their time shopping in a store or out delivering the bags. Instacart recently announced that after a successful pilot, they would be offering some in-store shoppers the chance to become employees.

�We quickly learned that there were a lot of improvements and efficiencies with this new model,� says Andrea Saul, VP of communications, who could not comment on the pending lawsuit. �Shoppers got better and more accurate at picking items, so we had fewer order issues. Shoppers also got faster at picking items, so we had more on time deliveries.�

Instacart also noticed a better retention rate among those granted employee status and found them easier to integrate into the company culture. �Ultimately, even though the model was costlier for us, the change improved our customer�s experience,� says Saul. The lawyers pursuing the case applauded the change but say it doesn�t affect the years of expenses, for instance, they believe are due to more than 10,000 workers. Those delivering groceries continue to shell out for their own gas and car maintenance.

The main argument that companies like Uber make is that forcing them to classify their drivers�or cleaners or delivery people�as employees would force them to do away with the freedom and flexibility that attracts many workers to the on-demand economy. Contractors get to work as much as they want when they want. �If I don�t want to go out one night because my stomach�s upset or there�s a Game of Thrones marathon on or my cats are being really cuddly, I�m just not going to go out,� says Chicago-based Christopher Gutierrez, who loves driving for Lyft. �I can�t have middle management telling me things and having to abide by different codes.�

In a recent motion fighting a class action suit, Uber�s lawyers said they might be forced to change their entire business model, making drivers work in set shifts and requiring that drivers work only for Uber.

The smaller companies making this change say they�ll be able to retain flexible hours. Luxe�s Lee says they�ll set no maximum or minimum valets have to work or tell part-time workers they can�t also work for Lyft. While he expects more companies to follow in their footsteps, he also says that he doesn�t believe that the traditional employment model works for every company. Like a growing chorus of Silicon Valley disrupters and academics, he believers America should rethink employment.

�There are two old paradigms that were created long, long ago in a different world,� he says. �There really needs, eventually, at some point, to be maybe like a third classification.� The great unknown is what, even if there was the political will to create such a thing, that third category would look like.

# ? Aug 5, 2015 13:25

bassguitarhero: Feb 29, 2008

I was walking to the embarcadero yesterday and about 40 people in Luxe tshirts riding razor scooters all came down the sidewalk at the same time

it was like autism on parade. and of course there were a shitload of other people walking on the sidewalk since it was 5pm so they were swerving all around everyone.

# ? Aug 5, 2015 14:48