leokitty posted:

Book club died pretty quickly But we did all manage to read The Lords of the Realm. I think we burnt out because that was a long book.

ElwoodCuse posted:

The NFL hosed up all kinds of things about that but perhaps someone more level headed should point them out

quote:

More than a few people advised Brady to suck it up and take the penalty because you can’t fight City Hall, overlooking the fact that, in this particular case, City Hall is presided over by a guy who couldn’t pour juice out of his loafers if the instructions were written on the heel.

quote:

Because the NFL, in its judicial functions, combines the investigative genius of Inspector Clouseau with the good faith of a Gaboon viper, the Patriots are caught, and leaks occur that make the situation seem worse than it is.

howe_sam posted:

Charles Pierce perhaps?

Lockback posted:

Simmons is filled with impotent rage about deflate gate. It's sorta funny in a sad kind of way.

https://twitter.com/BillSimmons

howe_sam posted:

Charles Pierce perhaps?

Lockback posted:

Simmons is filled with impotent rage about deflate gate. It's sorta funny in a sad kind of way.

https://twitter.com/BillSimmons

Mornacale posted:

i would wear a PETE LACOCK IS NO. 1 t-shirt

Lockback posted:

Simmons is filled with impotent rage about deflate gate. It's sorta funny in a sad kind of way.

https://twitter.com/BillSimmons

Luigi Thirty posted:

Rays minor leaguer Carter Burgess asked on Twitter today why Baseball Tonight has female analysts. When questioned by female baseball fans on Twitter, he replied with "deez nuts." Rays minor leaguer Carter Burgess has since deleted his Twitter account.

C. Everett Koop posted:

In which PFTCommenter punks the BBC https://twitter.com/rajiniv/status/629421290974244864

R.D. Mangles posted:

guy who writes all of his columns from the perspective of an illiterate moron is somehow the best sportswriter in America

R.D. Mangles posted:

guy who writes all of his columns from the perspective of an illiterate moron is somehow the best sportswriter in America

FlamingLiberal posted:

+10 points for not spelling quarterback right

commy gun posted:

Another +5 for "a" instead of "an" elite.

xbilkis posted:

Frackie Robinson posted:

Is this actually PFT Commenter?

Frackie Robinson posted:

The quoted image leaves out some important information



It's like the goddam Last Supper

Anals of History posted:

This feels like a character breaking the fourth wall

howe_sam posted:

Charles Pierce perhaps?

Frackie Robinson posted:

The quoted image leaves out some important information



It's like the goddam Last Supper

Copernic posted:

Is PFTCommenter's real identity a secret?

Star Trib posted:

In March 2013, Regina Sullivan, a senior associate athletic director for the University of Minnesota, filed a federal complaint against the U after she was fired from the school in October 2012. Teague, she said, “expected a woman in my position to take a passive role and defer to men’s opinions” on issues pertaining to Title IX, the law that bans sex discrimination in any federally funded school.

quote:

Two football players got in an argument this past week. One was a linebacker. The other was the starting quarterback. Often starting quarterbacks wear red jerseys during practices, to remind teammates not to hit them too hard.

That didn't stop the linebacker. In a dispute allegedly over $600, he coldcocked his quarterback in the face in the locker room — a "sucker punch" is how some witnesses described it — breaking the passer's jaw and landing him on the injured list for at least the first few weeks of the season.

The linebacker, IK Enemkpali, was immediately cut from the team. The quarterback, Geno Smith, underwent surgery and won't be taking snaps for a while.

Meanwhile, also this past week, an Australian tennis player named Nick Kyrgios got angry at his opponent, French Open champion Stan Wawrinka, turned to him and said that another player had slept with Wawrinka's girlfriend.

"Sorry to tell you that, mate," he added.

Well. At least he said sorry.

Swift justice for miscreants

Now, I'm not sure what to make of all this. It's true that athletes have a long history of fighting with each other. Remember Kermit Washington punching Rudy Tomjanovich, or Ron Artest attacking half the Pistons and their fans? Some sports, like football, actually encourage a little "healthy" intrasquad engagement, although breaking the starting quarterback's jaw doesn't show up on anybody's healthy list, least of all the quarterback's.

And it's true that in both cases, the perpetrators were swiftly dealt with. Enemkpali lost his job (although he was picked up by another team and his former coach). And Kyrgios immediately was fined the maximum on-site amount of $10,000, while his sport continues to review the matter and may add more penalties.

But there is a hair-trigger anger in sports today that is different than the old days when baseball players clutched at each other until the umpires separated them, or John McEnroe threw a tantrum and yelled at referees that "you guys are the absolute pits of the world!"

That stuff seems downright Brady Bunch compared to Gilbert Arenas, the NBA star, who a few years ago brought guns to practice and reportedly told a teammate he had been squabbling with to pick one if he was so tough. The teammate declined, then pulled out a gun of his own.

Is this sports or the Sopranos?

And this month marks the one-year anniversary of a still-controversial auto racing tragedy in which veteran driver Tony Stewart killed a young driver named Kevin Ward Jr. by striking him with his car in an upstate New York sprint car race. Stewart claimed it was 100% accidental, and his sport and legal authorities have exonerated him. But Ward's family recently filed a wrongful death lawsuit, claiming that Stewart intentionally gunned his engine when Ward was walking on the track.

At the very least, it was a confrontation that had a seriously tragic conclusion.

You wonder what's on the horizon?

Have your teammates' backs

Look. Our world has clearly become angrier. Everyone yells. Everyone demands respect. (Whatever happened to earning it?) Everyone has an opinion. Everyone tweets. Twitter, Facebook and Instagram give harbor to fast tempers. Reality shows fill us with the idea that if there isn't conflict, it's not really life.

If sports was not always refuge from that, it was at least a place where the rules kept your worst temper in check. There were fines nobody wanted to incur and penalties that would hurt the team. There was also the scorn of the locker room if you broke the cardinal rule of having your teammates' backs.

Pulling guns or cracking a jaw doesn't really fit that spirit. And telling your opponent that your friend slept with his girlfriend doesn't jibe with the spirit of "the gentleman's sport."

The culprits in the past week's incidents were very young (Enemkpali is 24, Kyrgios is 20). Maybe this is the new manners. Maybe it's a sign of the times. Maybe it's just coincidence. But I've covered sports for a long time and can't remember either incident ever happening before. A teammate broke the quarterback's jaw? My buddy slept with your girl? We're going to have to come up with a new meaning for sportsmanship. Hopefully it won't be "a word that means nothing anymore."

quote:

Modern baseball statistics are much like restless leg syndrome, like gluten or sleep numbers. You know, crap someone made up for no good reason.

In fact, I think CRAP is one of the new baseball stats. It stands for Creepy Ratios And Percentages. Or maybe not. One of my favorites is LIPS (Late Inning Pressure Situations) though it was much more fun when it belonged to Morganna, the Kissing Bandit.

It isn't as if baseball did not already have enough statistics. Good old RBIs and ERAs. They've gotten us through peace, war, the wave, artificial turf and the San Diego Chicken, so it isn't as if we were under-stat-ted. Not stat-isfied?

But it is not enough for a run to be earned any more, it must be dissected and scrutinized, analyzed, charted, graphed and plotted until all that's left are shards of arithmetic and an eyeshade.

Anyone who understands, endorses or can determine the baseball statistic Wins Above Replacement (WAR) may now be excused from this discussion.

And take VORP with you. I believe that was a cold war alliance before it became Value Over Replacement Player.

The rest of us will fill out our scorecards the same way Red Smith used to and pay no attention to why the Cubs hit fewer ground balls than almost any other team (because they strike out more.)

Oops. I did not mean to be so sabermetric. Knowing stuff like the ratio between ground balls and fly balls is essential to the modern appreciation of the grand old game. An out is no longer just an out and plate appearances per strikeout must figure in there someplace.

And, yet, even with BABIP (batting average on balls in play) and PECOTA (player empirical comparison and optimization test algorithm), there is room for more.

RSWS: Runs scored while scratching. This is usually a first baseman stat though it applies to any player or coach who can't resist the tug of nature.

PTLBG: Practice time lost beard grooming. Baseball beards are the most distressing trend in sports since NBA coaches had perms. Any slump, pitching or hitting, is directly proportional to the length of hair that hides the face, except with the Yankees where push comes to shave.

BBS/BAS: Baseball before steroids and baseball after steroids. All baseball statistics preceding Jose Canseco and following Barry Bonds are valid. All those in between require urine samples, a subpoena and the inevitable Congressional subcommittee.

GW/LBDL: Games won or lost because of dumb luck. This stat covers every case that cannot be explained by formula or computer program, and must be the primary explanation as to why the Marlins have won as many World Series titles in 22 years as the Cubs have in 111.

GW/LDTRB: Games won or lost due to ritual behavior. The exact opposite of dumb luck. This stat encompasses everything from curses to rally caps. Whatever is done during a hitting streak must continue to be done (unchanged underwear, alas) and anything that is done during a losing streak must be undone (step on a crack you break your catcher's bat.)

PERA: This is what a pitcher's earned run average would have been if he did not give up home runs, base hits, bases on balls or could find the strike zone without a GPS (not a baseball stat).

STOP: Spring training optimistic predictions. Every team finishes first. Eventually it may give way to WCM or Wild Card Mania, which is treating the opportunity to play one extra game the same as winning the pennant.

BCHR: Batting cage home runs. Very big with the White Sox.

ESWTU: Embarrassing selfies wearing throwback uniforms. The cry can be heard throughout the Alleghenies. "You mean Willie Stargell actually dressed like this?"

HFVTA: Hall of Fame votes taken away. Older voters who are no longer allowed to select players who actually saw Willie Stargell dress like that, who don't know the difference between a meme and a hashtag and, furthermore, don't care.

R.D. Mangles posted:

Old Person Tribune Columnist Bernie Lincicome with the Ultimate Old Man Baseball Column