terrible programmers: my god, it's full of chars

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > terrible programmers: my god, it's full of chars

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coffeetable: Feb 5, 2006; TELL ME AGAIN HOW GREAT BRITAIN WOULD BE IF IT WAS RULED BY THE MERCILESS JACKBOOT OF PRINCE CHARLES

YES I DO TALK TO PLANTS ACTUALLY

does your new company use stack ranking valeyard

# ? Sep 11, 2015 15:25

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# ? Jun 1, 2024 03:40

Valeyard: Mar 30, 2012; Grimey Drawer

coffeetable posted:

does your new company use stack ranking valeyard

Not quite, but there is a strange rating system and I get the feeling that just doing your job will net you in the negative end. From what I understand the highest rating is practically unattainable mainly because anyone that is that good would be working elsewhere

# ? Sep 11, 2015 15:42

gonadic io: Feb 16, 2011; >>=

Well my new job is great. Not even as many obnoxious people as I was fearing given that Fintech combines the two most insufferable demographics in industry

# ? Sep 11, 2015 16:09

DONT THREAD ON ME: Oct 1, 2002; by Nyc_Tattoo; Floss Finder

gonadic io posted:

Well my new job is great. Not even as many obnoxious people as I was fearing given that Fintech combines the two most insufferable demographics in industry

trolls and who else?

# ? Sep 11, 2015 16:10

Valeyard: Mar 30, 2012; Grimey Drawer

gonadic io posted:

Well my new job is great. Not even as many obnoxious people as I was fearing given that Fintech combines the two most insufferable demographics in industry

Well, I'm genuinely glad to hear that. Do you work near the center?

# ? Sep 11, 2015 17:05

gonadic io: Feb 16, 2011; >>=

Valeyard posted:

Well, I'm genuinely glad to hear that. Do you work near the center?

V close to London Street station

# ? Sep 11, 2015 17:14

gonadic io: Feb 16, 2011; >>=

i'd totally be up for getting lunch with any yosposter if they're under 20 mins from there.

# ? Sep 11, 2015 18:55

DaTroof: Nov 16, 2000; CC LIMERICK CONTEST GRAND CHAMPION
There once was a poster named Troof
Who was getting quite long in the toof

tef posted:

best story i've heard is about an sql expert who had a series of sudden onset issues preventing him writing a line of code

our last 3 candidates for a junior dev position left the 4-question code test incomplete. None of them got through question #3, which asks them to implement a singleton in the language of their choice

e: they're allowed to use the internet during the test

# ? Sep 11, 2015 18:58

Symbolic Butt: Mar 22, 2009; (_!_); Buglord

DaTroof posted:

our last 3 candidates for a junior dev position left the 4-question code test incomplete. None of them got through question #3, which asks them to implement a singleton in the language of their choice

e: they're allowed to use the internet during the test

let me do this one for you

code:

while True:
    print('gently caress singletons')

# ? Sep 11, 2015 19:00

DaTroof: Nov 16, 2000; CC LIMERICK CONTEST GRAND CHAMPION
There once was a poster named Troof
Who was getting quite long in the toof

Symbolic Butt posted:

let me do this one for you
code:
while True:
    print('gently caress singletons')

if grading was up to me i would accept this answer

# ? Sep 11, 2015 19:04

DaTroof: Nov 16, 2000; CC LIMERICK CONTEST GRAND CHAMPION
There once was a poster named Troof
Who was getting quite long in the toof

then again, if the test itself was up to me, it probably wouldn't exist

# ? Sep 11, 2015 19:05

NihilCredo: Jun 6, 2011; iram omni possibili modo preme:
plus una illa te diffamabit, quam multæ virtutes commendabunt

DaTroof posted:

then again, if the test itself was up to me, it probably wouldn't exist

DaTroof posted:

our last 3 candidates for a junior dev position left the 4-question code test incomplete. None of them got through question #3, which asks them to implement a singleton in the language of their choice

e: they're allowed to use the internet during the test

I dunno it seems to be the test is proving highly valuable

# ? Sep 11, 2015 19:11

NihilCredo: Jun 6, 2011; iram omni possibili modo preme:
plus una illa te diffamabit, quam multæ virtutes commendabunt

when I start doing interviews my first question will be some extremely obscure trivia with a highly-ranked stack overflow answer. reject all candidates who can't Google it in under three minutes

# ? Sep 11, 2015 19:15

DaTroof: Nov 16, 2000; CC LIMERICK CONTEST GRAND CHAMPION
There once was a poster named Troof
Who was getting quite long in the toof

NihilCredo posted:

I dunno it seems to be the test is proving highly valuable

maybe, but it also seems to tell us the same thing we'd learn in three minutes of an interview

nb: the candidate pool is so dire that some of these guys might get interviews anyway

# ? Sep 11, 2015 19:16

Shaggar: Apr 26, 2006

Symbolic Butt posted:

let me do this one for you
code:
while True:
    print('gently caress singletons')

theres nothing wrong with singletons

# ? Sep 11, 2015 19:17

jesus WEP: Oct 17, 2004

singletons are in fact good if u user them in the right place

# ? Sep 11, 2015 19:34

Dessert Rose: May 17, 2004; awoken in control of a lucid deep dream...

some things really are singletons, but most things would be better if they weren't implemented that way

# ? Sep 11, 2015 19:50

Bloody: Mar 3, 2013

like what

# ? Sep 11, 2015 19:57

Captain Foo: May 11, 2004; we vibin'
we slidin'
we breathin'
we dyin'

Bloody posted:

like what

your posts

# ? Sep 11, 2015 20:01

more like dICK: Feb 15, 2010; This is inevitable.

Code your class normally and have Spring instantiate it once.

# ? Sep 11, 2015 20:09

echinopsis: Apr 13, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

would my live be better if i was a coder y/n

# ? Sep 11, 2015 21:08

oh no blimp issue: Feb 23, 2011

outlook not so good

# ? Sep 11, 2015 21:10

echinopsis: Apr 13, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

mmmm

# ? Sep 11, 2015 21:19

distortion park: Apr 25, 2011

NihilCredo posted:

when I start doing interviews my first question will be some extremely obscure trivia with a highly-ranked stack overflow answer. reject all candidates who can't Google it in under three minutes

There's a question on stack overflow about "pure" functions where the topnratwd and acceptef answer is wrong (the second, correct, answer is by Eric lippert) and I'd just print it out and ask people what they thought was correct.

wouldn't matter what they answered just so long as they had good reasons

# ? Sep 11, 2015 21:30

eschaton: Mar 7, 2007; Don't you just hate when you wind up in a store with people who are in a socioeconomic class that is pretty obviously about two levels lower than your own?

Valeyard posted:

I've had a 2 hour session on "personal branding", another 2 hours on " strategic networking" and now 2 hours on "professional relationships"

this is for a large consultancy, isn't it?

when recruiting, Accidenture used to claim they could turn anyone a highly skilled developer in 8 weeks of their boot camp

then they would bill out those developers at $350/hr

# ? Sep 11, 2015 21:35

eschaton: Mar 7, 2007; Don't you just hate when you wind up in a store with people who are in a socioeconomic class that is pretty obviously about two levels lower than your own?

Valeyard posted:

It's trying to show people that teams don't work when you are back stabbing arseholes, in progress atm

lol, as if a large consultancy isn't set up to explicitly advance the most backstabbing assholes possible

though they probably do need a meek, compliant underclass to do the real work while the "partners" do more "networking"

how's your golf game?

# ? Sep 11, 2015 21:37

eschaton: Mar 7, 2007; Don't you just hate when you wind up in a store with people who are in a socioeconomic class that is pretty obviously about two levels lower than your own?

DaTroof posted:

maybe, but it also seems to tell us the same thing we'd learn in three minutes of an interview

nb: the candidate pool is so dire that some of these guys might get interviews anyway

the candidate pool is never that dire

a bad hire can be a net negative for a team

# ? Sep 11, 2015 21:39

Symbolic Butt: Mar 22, 2009; (_!_); Buglord

hey you

yes you

come here, you'll love this....

code:

#!/bin/sh
// 2> /dev/null; exec node "$0" "$@"
console.log("fart")

it's a node.js pattern for pros!

as you can see the complexity of our applications is not enough for a mere shebang

# ? Sep 11, 2015 22:10

qntm: Jun 17, 2009

St Evan Echoes posted:

singletons are in fact good if u user them in the right place

this is kind of a tautology though :-/

# ? Sep 11, 2015 22:26

DaTroof: Nov 16, 2000; CC LIMERICK CONTEST GRAND CHAMPION
There once was a poster named Troof
Who was getting quite long in the toof

eschaton posted:

the candidate pool is never that dire

a bad hire can be a net negative for a team

i agree, but it's an act of sheer desperation and it's completely out of my hands

the end result of our process is that bad candidates don't get weeded out until the second interview (the technical one, which is the first time other developers get involved) despite the fact they tanked what should have been a smoke test two appointments ago

i guess i'm not so much criticizing the test as the fact that it's not serving its intended purpose

# ? Sep 11, 2015 22:26

coffeetable: Feb 5, 2006; TELL ME AGAIN HOW GREAT BRITAIN WOULD BE IF IT WAS RULED BY THE MERCILESS JACKBOOT OF PRINCE CHARLES

YES I DO TALK TO PLANTS ACTUALLY

echinopsis posted:

would my live be better if i was a coder y/n

it's well-paid, you can always find a job, and the barriers to entry are lower than for p much any other comparable profession

anyone who thinks software dev is a bad deal has forgotten how loving awful most ppl's jobs are

# ? Sep 11, 2015 22:34

oh no blimp issue: Feb 23, 2011

shhhh, don't tell anyone about our cushy lives

# ? Sep 11, 2015 22:37

Jerry Bindle: May 16, 2003

Awia posted:

shhhh, don't tell anyone about our cushy lives

i had to come in before 10:30am for a meeting today :'(

# ? Sep 11, 2015 22:42

qntm: Jun 17, 2009

also generally relatively flexible hours, you can work from home, stress level is relatively low

# ? Sep 11, 2015 22:46

Dessert Rose: May 17, 2004; awoken in control of a lucid deep dream...

qntm posted:

stress level is relatively low

lol

# ? Sep 11, 2015 23:16

jony neuemonic: Nov 13, 2009

Dessert Rose posted:

lol

they're not wrong, though.

# ? Sep 11, 2015 23:17

qntm: Jun 17, 2009

be honest, how much do you care about the code you write

what's the worst thing that could happen if it didn't work

# ? Sep 11, 2015 23:24

oh no blimp issue: Feb 23, 2011

people could die

# ? Sep 11, 2015 23:28

echinopsis: Apr 13, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

coffeetable posted:

it's well-paid, you can always find a job, and the barriers to entry are lower than for p much any other comparable profession

anyone who thinks software dev is a bad deal has forgotten how loving awful most ppl's jobs are

i suspect the coding market in christchurch new zealand isnt that ghreat. all my comp sci mates had to move to auckland at minimum and mostly sydney or further

# ? Sep 11, 2015 23:35

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# ? Jun 1, 2024 03:40

Dessert Rose: May 17, 2004; awoken in control of a lucid deep dream...

qntm posted:

be honest, how much do you care about the code you write

what's the worst thing that could happen if it didn't work

someone's 911 call wouldnt go through and people could actually die

# ? Sep 12, 2015 00:10

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > terrible programmers: my god, it's full of chars

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