Anti-Food Porn Thread: Seems Saggy Not Saggy A Bit Saggy Ball

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Paladinus: Jan 11, 2014; heyHEYYYY!!!

Tiggum posted:

Someone wanted me to eat that chocolate with Vegemite in it, but that's already been done, and anyway, I don't think they're selling it any more. I certainly couldn't find any. So I've decided to go one better and do a home-made version. All you need's Vegemite and chocolate, right? The proper version also has caramel, but I'm not going to bother with that. I will get some decent chocolate though, instead of Cadbury Dairy Milk. So here are the ingredients:

And a nice cup of tea to go with it:

I decided to start small and simple. A little bit of chocolate...

and a little bit of Vegemite.

I popped the whole thing in my mouth and began to chew. The first thing I tasted was just the Vegemite, but after a moment I did begin to detect a little of the chocolate flavour coming through. Then it became slightly unpleasant - the Vegemite seemed somehow to have brought out the bitterness in the chocolate, and that's all you get by the end. I can't say I'd recommend it. But I wasn't done yet. I put on a piece of toast and drank some of my tea, then I assembled the ingredients for the next step:

Vegemite, of course, is meant for sandwiches. And you can't have a Vegemite sandwich without butter. And why not some peanut butter as well? Vegemite and peanut butter go well together.

Now this was much nicer, although mostly because the chocolate was masked by the other flavours. As you might expect from the quantities, the peanut butter predominates, but it mixes well with the Vegemite to produce a flavour that's not quite what you'd expect of either of them (although I already knew that from previous experience). The chocolate, once again, added a layer of bitterness, and a little bit of sweetness.

It wasn't something I'll be eating again in a hurry, but it wasn't bad, as such. If it were served to me I would eat it without complaint.

Anyway, I had no trouble finishing it off.

Your tea is supposed to be orange to beige, mate. What you had was a really disastrous cup of tea. Sorry.
Also, you need milk chocolate to go with Vegemite, not dark. Get it right.

# ? Sep 22, 2015 10:56

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# ? May 9, 2024 23:59

RareAcumen: Dec 28, 2012

Paladinus posted:

Your tea is supposed to be orange to beige, mate. What you had was a really disastrous cup of tea. Sorry.

http://www.stashtea.com/Stash-Tea-Chai-Spice-Black/dp/B005DM5S3E
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Milk_tea

Got a real sudden flood of tea purists ITT all of a sudden.

# ? Sep 22, 2015 10:59

Paladinus: Jan 11, 2014; heyHEYYYY!!!

RareAcumen posted:

http://www.stashtea.com/Stash-Tea-Chai-Spice-Black/dp/B005DM5S3E
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Milk_tea

Got a real sudden flood of tea purists ITT all of a sudden.

Unless that cup of tea had pepper and bay leaf in it, my point stands.

# ? Sep 22, 2015 11:02

GoutPatrol: Oct 17, 2009; *Stupid Babby*

RareAcumen posted:

http://www.stashtea.com/Stash-Tea-Chai-Spice-Black/dp/B005DM5S3E
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Milk_tea

Got a real sudden flood of tea purists ITT all of a sudden.

You ain't got real milk tea, where are your pearls?

# ? Sep 22, 2015 12:39

Gridlocked: Aug 2, 2014; MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves

Tiggum posted:

And you can't have a Vegemite sandwich without butter.

Putting butter on Vegemite sandwiches/toast?

:mediocre:

Your weakness will never let you into Valhalla

# ? Sep 22, 2015 13:34

left_unattended: Apr 13, 2009; "The person who seeks all their applause from outside has their happiness in another's keeping."
Dale Carnegie

gently caress Lindt chocolate. It tastes like crap. I've never understood why people circlejerk over it.

# ? Sep 22, 2015 13:34

4 inch cut no femmes: May 31, 2011

f u I like lindt truffles

# ? Sep 22, 2015 13:42

Data Graham: Dec 28, 2009; 📈📊🍪😋

left_unattended posted:

gently caress Lindt chocolate. It tastes like crap. I've never understood why people circlejerk over it.

The 70% was amazing until they reformulated it for some reason a few years ago.

# ? Sep 22, 2015 14:44

Horrible Smutbeast: Sep 2, 2011

Tiggum posted:

Someone wanted me to eat that chocolate with Vegemite in it, but that's already been done, and anyway, I don't think they're selling it any more. I certainly couldn't find any. So I've decided to go one better and do a home-made version. All you need's Vegemite and chocolate, right? The proper version also has caramel, but I'm not going to bother with that. I will get some decent chocolate though, instead of Cadbury Dairy Milk. So here are the ingredients:

It really needs the caramel. It turns the vegemite into some sort of horrifying salt napalm that sticks to all the cracks of your teeth while the milk chocolate kind of fucks off into no mans land because it's generic milk chocolate. All you should be left with is vegemite and sadness.

# ? Sep 22, 2015 15:05

PCOS Bill: May 12, 2013; by FactsAreUseless

Coffee and tea need lots of milk and sugar

# ? Sep 22, 2015 16:28

VendaGoat: Nov 1, 2005

Horrible Smutbeast posted:

vegemite and sadness.

Name change please

# ? Sep 22, 2015 16:31

Decrepus: May 21, 2008; In the end, his dominion did not touch a single poster.

My food is normally better than this, I only messed up this one time that I just so happened to be taking a photograph for the internet.

# ? Sep 22, 2015 16:40

AnonSpore: Jan 19, 2012; "I didn't see the part where he develops as a character so I guess he never developed as a character"

Efexeye posted:

dog

Dog is pretty good. Surprisingly greasy meat but not bad at all.

The White Dragon posted:

You say dog but the tail on the left side says rat

dog is ok, i had it by accident once and probably would've thought it was pretty good if i hadn't learned it was once man's best friend after

They're not snatching pets off the street to chop up or anything. Food dogs are mongrels bred specifically for maximum tastiness.

# ? Sep 22, 2015 17:27

PCOS Bill: May 12, 2013; by FactsAreUseless

If you can't handle eating dog because ~food with a cute face~ you probably ought to consider veganism. You're too disconnected from the food chain to be near the top.

# ? Sep 22, 2015 18:14

Moongrave: Jun 19, 2004; Finally Living Rent Free

I will eat the meat.

# ? Sep 22, 2015 18:50

Arivia: Mar 17, 2011

Jesus gently caress that's a ton of mayonnaise

# ? Sep 22, 2015 18:53

AnonSpore: Jan 19, 2012; "I didn't see the part where he develops as a character so I guess he never developed as a character"

BARONS CYBER SKULL posted:

I will eat the meat.

Mayo over turds with a scoop of the toilet water, my favorite

# ? Sep 22, 2015 18:56

Crow Jane: Oct 18, 2012; nothin' wrong with a lady drinkin' alone in her room

I made pancakes flavored with leftover cannoli filling this morning. It was not the best idea I've ever had.

# ? Sep 22, 2015 19:00

VendaGoat: Nov 1, 2005

Crow Jane posted:

I made pancakes flavored with leftover cannoli filling this morning. It was not the best idea I've ever had.

How can this not be a good idea?

# ? Sep 22, 2015 19:02

pookel: Oct 27, 2011; Ultra Carp

AnonSpore posted:

~~Mayo~~Shaving cream over turds with a scoop of the toilet water, my favorite

Fixed.

# ? Sep 22, 2015 19:02

Crow Jane: Oct 18, 2012; nothin' wrong with a lady drinkin' alone in her room

VendaGoat posted:

How can this not be a good idea?

They were... dense. Very dense. And waaay too sweet, even without adding any additional sugar to the batter. I just have the unpleasant feeling that I ate a huge piece of cake for breakfast.

# ? Sep 22, 2015 19:05

AnonSpore: Jan 19, 2012; "I didn't see the part where he develops as a character so I guess he never developed as a character"

Crow Jane posted:

I ate a huge piece of cake for breakfast.

VendaGoat posted:

How can this not be a good idea?

# ? Sep 22, 2015 19:12

VendaGoat: Nov 1, 2005

AnonSpore posted:

This, but also...

VVVV loving :laffo:

VendaGoat has a new favorite as of 19:33 on Sep 22, 2015

# ? Sep 22, 2015 19:17

Crow Jane: Oct 18, 2012; nothin' wrong with a lady drinkin' alone in her room

My mind is into it, my body is not.

edit: that does not go well with the Cosby post AT ALL.

# ? Sep 22, 2015 19:17

gay but cute tho: Apr 23, 2015

Apparently the first one is "vegan sausage" and the second one is a "vegan peanut butter cup" :stonk:

# ? Sep 22, 2015 20:08

VendaGoat: Nov 1, 2005

gay but cute tho posted:

Apparently the first one is "vegan sausage" and the second one is a "vegan peanut butter cup"

The Wurst!

# ? Sep 22, 2015 20:10

Drythe: Aug 26, 2012

From my feed

# ? Sep 22, 2015 20:23

SulfurMonoxideCute: Feb 9, 2008; I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

PCOS Bill posted:

Coffee and tea need lots of milk and sugar

I thought you were some kind of hyper-masculine red meat eating tough guy?

When'd you allow yourself to get so soft on this issue?

# ? Sep 22, 2015 21:03

Moongrave: Jun 19, 2004; Finally Living Rent Free

Todd Can Cook

# ? Sep 22, 2015 21:09

root beer: Nov 13, 2005

^^^very creative!!! :downsbravo:

like how you'd say it to a first-grader

gay but cute tho posted:

Apparently the first one is "vegan sausage" and the second one is a "vegan peanut butter cup"

There are vegan peanut butter cups out there that are pretty drat good, and going back to Reese's cups is impossible for how cloyingly sweet they really are. Dunno what to tell you about that sausage though, unnerving poo poo right there.

# ? Sep 22, 2015 22:31

Dodecalypse: Jun 21, 2012; SKA SUCKS

Titus Sardonicus posted:

^^^very creative!!! like how you'd say it to a first-grader

There are vegan peanut butter cups out there that are pretty drat good, and going back to Reese's cups is impossible for how cloyingly sweet they really are. Dunno what to tell you about that sausage though, unnerving poo poo right there.

It's the same as real sausage, some of it is literal poo poo and looks awful and others are good. Whole Foods sells a couple brands of vegan sausage that are really good.

# ? Sep 22, 2015 22:57

AnonSpore: Jan 19, 2012; "I didn't see the part where he develops as a character so I guess he never developed as a character"

he Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Post Your Favorite (or Request) > Anti-Food Porn Thread: Some Creativity Went Into This Meal

# ? Sep 22, 2015 23:14

Gridlocked: Aug 2, 2014; MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves

gay but cute tho posted:

Apparently the first one is "vegan sausage" and the second one is a "vegan peanut butter cup"

They both look like depressing sausage.

inb4 thats what she said.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 00:08

PCOS Bill: May 12, 2013; by FactsAreUseless

Picnic Princess posted:

I thought you were some kind of hyper-masculine red meat eating tough guy?

When'd you allow yourself to get so soft on this issue?

I like my coffee and tea with milk and sugar, I am not soft on this issue, there is no debate.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 00:12

titties: May 10, 2012; They're like two suicide notes stuffed into a glitter bra

Coffee

Ingredients:
roasted, ground coffee beans
water

Preparation:

Heat water to 190 degrees F
Add 2-4 scoops coffee to coffee press
Pour water into press, stir
Allow to steep for 4 - 8 minutes
Press
Pour
Drink

THIS IS NOT UP FOR DEBATE

E: also here, have my fav cocktail recipe

Pour liquor into a glass
Drink liquor

# ? Sep 23, 2015 00:27