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  • Locked thread
McSpergin
Sep 10, 2013

titties posted:

Coffee

Ingredients:
roasted, ground coffee beans
water

Preparation:

Heat water to 190 degrees F
Add 2-4 scoops coffee to coffee press
Pour water into press, stir
Allow to steep for 4 - 8 minutes
Press
Pour
Drink

THIS IS NOT UP FOR DEBATE

E: also here, have my fav cocktail recipe

Pour liquor into a glass
Drink liquor

I find a 1:14 ratio of coffee to water is the ideal French press ratio for hot brewed and the water has to be 85-90C (190-195 on the babby Fahrenheit scale) and 4-8 mins is definitely ideal. For cold press - 1:6 ratio with an overnight steep

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Kakairo
Dec 5, 2005

In case of emergency, my ass can be used as a flotation device.

McSpergin posted:

I find a 1:14 ratio of coffee to water is the ideal French press ratio for hot brewed and the water has to be 85-90C (190-195 on the babby Fahrenheit scale) and 4-8 mins is definitely ideal. For cold press - 1:6 ratio with an overnight steep

Oooh, thank you for reminding me that I need to experiment with cold press ratios again.

GoutPatrol
Oct 17, 2009

*Stupid Babby*

Arivia posted:

Jesus gently caress that's a ton of mayonnaise

I think that's sour cream. Which would give it a sad, Eastern European flavor.

Code Jockey
Jan 24, 2006

69420 basic bytes free

Dog dick poutine?

titties
May 10, 2012

They're like two suicide notes stuffed into a glitter bra

McSpergin posted:

I find a 1:14 ratio of coffee to water is the ideal French press ratio for hot brewed and the water has to be 85-90C (190-195 on the babby Fahrenheit scale) and 4-8 mins is definitely ideal. For cold press - 1:6 ratio with an overnight steep

Cold press does not include the necessary step of heating the water to 190 degrees F and is therefor not allowed, please stop discussing it

titties posted:

Coffee
Heat water to 190 degrees F
THIS IS NOT UP FOR DEBATE

Derek of the Andes
Dec 10, 2009

Code Jockey posted:

Dog dick poutine?

Could be a chili Todd

Kakairo
Dec 5, 2005

In case of emergency, my ass can be used as a flotation device.

titties posted:

Cold press does not include the necessary step of heating the water to 190 degrees F and is therefor not allowed, please stop discussing it

Cold press is it's own beverage, as evidenced by the fact that Starbucks hot coffee is burned and stale while Starbucks cold brew coffee is delicious.

Samizdata
May 14, 2007

Code Jockey posted:

Dog dick poutine?

:golfclap:

Moongrave
Jun 19, 2004

Finally Living Rent Free
Hi friends!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qZ5Hn-5l2o4

Dabir
Nov 10, 2012

titties posted:

Cold press does not include the necessary step of heating the water to 190 degrees F and is therefor not allowed, please stop discussing it

coffee pol pot

pienipple
Mar 20, 2009

That's wrong!
Let coffe infuse into cream in the fridge, strain well, make loving amazing coffee truffles.

cash crab
Apr 5, 2015

all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology


Aesop Poprock posted:

ominous carrot

NEW BAND NAME I CALL IT

Mexican Deathgasm
Aug 17, 2010

Ramrod XTreme

pienipple posted:

Let coffe infuse into cream in the fridge, strain well, make loving amazing coffee truffles.

I demand more information

rndmnmbr
Jul 3, 2012

titties posted:

Coffee

Ingredients:
roasted, ground coffee beans
water

Preparation:

Heat water to 190 degrees F
Add 2-4 scoops coffee to coffee press
Pour water into press, stir
Allow to steep for 4 - 8 minutes
Press
Pour on ground
Drink anything else

THIS IS NOT UP FOR DEBATE

FTFY.

Also gently caress coffee.

Wasabi the J
Jan 23, 2008

MOM WAS RIGHT
What if I sous vide the coffee with loose corn on pizza?

HairyManling
Jul 20, 2011

No flipping.
Fun Shoe

Wasabi the J posted:

What if I sous vide the coffee with loose corn on pizza?
At that point I think you can safely call it a sandwich.

Moongrave
Jun 19, 2004

Finally Living Rent Free

Wasabi the J posted:

What if I sous vide the coffee with loose corn on pizza?

I tried to find Coffee Pizza but came up with nothing. You know what you have to do now, since you summoned it from the beyond.

Samizdata
May 14, 2007

BARONS CYBER SKULL posted:

I tried to find Coffee Pizza but came up with nothing. You know what you have to do now, since you summoned it from the beyond.

Like they should listen to a drat Snatcher anyway.

beato
Nov 26, 2004

CHILLL OUT, DICK WAD.
Belashi - Meat filled Russian donuts that look like cat butts.

Paladinus
Jan 11, 2014

heyHEYYYY!!!

beato posted:

Belashi - Meat filled Russian donuts that look like cat butts.



I don't know what you do to your cat, but normally that's not how a cat's anus looks like.

McSpergin
Sep 10, 2013

titties posted:

Cold press does not include the necessary step of heating the water to 190 degrees F and is therefor not allowed, please stop discussing it

:getout:

Chinaman7000
Nov 28, 2003

beato posted:

Belashi - Meat filled Russian donuts that look like cat butts.



Take your cat to the vet.

Comptroll The Forums
Apr 25, 2007

DON'T HURT MY FEE FEES!

beato posted:

Belashi - Meat filled Russian donuts that look like cat butts.



noooooooo riiiiiiiiinnnnggg
:goonsay:

GOTTA STAY FAI
Mar 24, 2005

~no glitter in the gutter~
~no twilight galaxy~
College Slice

todd posted:

I don't think I can eat both!

I don't think I can either, Todd

Horrible Smutbeast
Sep 2, 2011

Mexican Deathgasm posted:

I demand more information

You basically just soak really good espresso or strong coffee grounds in cream overnight in the fridge, then strain it the next day. It's coldbrewing coffee but with cream instead.

Then you make a ganache out of it. The recipe I use is 8 ounces of good, room temperature chocolate broken or grated in a mixing bowl that you pour 1/2 cup hot cream over it and a little sprinkle of salt. Wait 1-3 minutes, then mix until the cream melts the chocolate and blends together. Put it in the fridge and let it set, take it out and eat it with a spoon like a loving neanderthal because holy poo poo it's good. You can infuse more flavours into the cream beyond the coffee (like lavender or something) or just add spices to the ganache mixture.

If you want to go the cheap and fast route of making coffee flavoured truffles put a scoop or two of instant coffee in the cream while it heats up. There's also the option of just heating the coffee grounds up in the cream instead of coldbrewing but it makes it a bit more acidic/sharp. You can also make tea flavoured truffles by heating the leaves in the cream and straining them out when you pour it over the chocolate.

It's one of the only desserts I can't trust myself to make because I'll eat the entire bowl at once.

pookel
Oct 27, 2011

Ultra Carp

Horrible Smutbeast posted:

You basically just soak really good espresso or strong coffee grounds in cream overnight in the fridge, then strain it the next day. It's coldbrewing coffee but with cream instead.

Then you make a ganache out of it. The recipe I use is 8 ounces of good, room temperature chocolate broken or grated in a mixing bowl that you pour 1/2 cup hot cream over it and a little sprinkle of salt. Wait 1-3 minutes, then mix until the cream melts the chocolate and blends together. Put it in the fridge and let it set, take it out and eat it with a spoon like a loving neanderthal because holy poo poo it's good. You can infuse more flavours into the cream beyond the coffee (like lavender or something) or just add spices to the ganache mixture.

:vince:

Would. Will. As soon as possible.

pienipple
Mar 20, 2009

That's wrong!
I used strong fresh ground coffee and steeped it in cream in the fridge for two days, then strained it, warmed it in a double boiler and mixed in the chocolate to form ganache. Those ones I rolled in cocoa powder.

Male Tiers
Dec 27, 2012

Why don't you just lay down your weapons now?

Crow Jane
Oct 18, 2012

nothin' wrong with a lady drinkin' alone in her room

My mind says yogurt and granola. But it's probably much more sinister, isn't it?

Oh god, is it mayonnaise?

theres a will theres moe
Jan 10, 2007


Hair Elf
nothing says refreshing like sepia

Crow Jane
Oct 18, 2012

nothin' wrong with a lady drinkin' alone in her room

Number 1 Sexy Dad posted:

nothing says refreshing like sepia

A tall glass of iced tea would not appreciate your tone.

theres a will theres moe
Jan 10, 2007


Hair Elf

Crow Jane posted:

A tall glass of iced tea would not appreciate your tone.

my ... sepiatone? :haw:

VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005

Number 1 Sexy Dad posted:

my ... sepiatone? :haw:

:suicide:

Code Jockey
Jan 24, 2006

69420 basic bytes free

Number 1 Sexy Dad posted:

my ... sepiatone? :haw:

Boooooo

Crow Jane
Oct 18, 2012

nothin' wrong with a lady drinkin' alone in her room
I guess even sexy dads tell terrible dad jokes.

AnonSpore
Jan 19, 2012

"I didn't see the part where he develops as a character so I guess he never developed as a character"

Crow Jane posted:

I guess even sexy dads tell terrible dad jokes.

They just do it sexily

Crow Jane
Oct 18, 2012

nothin' wrong with a lady drinkin' alone in her room

AnonSpore posted:

They just do it sexily

:j: Oooh baby, I'm so horny

:pervert: Hi So Horny, I'm Dad :haw:!!!


:gonk::gonk::gonk::gonk:

VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005

Crow Jane posted:

:j: Oooh baby, I'm so horny

:pervert: Hi So Horny, I'm Dad :haw:!!!


:gonk::gonk::gonk::gonk:

Gonna try this at the bar next time.

Crow Jane
Oct 18, 2012

nothin' wrong with a lady drinkin' alone in her room

VendaGoat posted:

Gonna try this at the bar next time.

The kind of girl who fell for that would probably serve you raw goldfish on a styrofoam plate.

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VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005

Crow Jane posted:

The kind of girl who fell for that would probably serve you raw goldfish on a styrofoam plate.

Fine then Crow Jane, what kind of bar do you hang out in? :v:

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