Knyteguy's Finances: More harebrained schemes than a sitcom dad

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Knyteguy: Jul 6, 2005; YES to love
NO to shirts; Toilet Rascal

n8r posted:

Your entire budget makes very little sense unless you're posting what your income is, what is it now? I haven't seen anything to indicate what the status of stuff is since your wife got the new job.

Why is has your discretionary increased to nearly $1200 a month? When I suggested doing a $1000/month payment on the car, I was thinking a $1000 total payment, not a $1000+$510 payment, but if you can make it work, go for it.

Why did you insist on spending in what I'm guessing is nearly $300 on that car for the oil change / transmission service if you weren't even sure you were going to keep it? Why couldn't you hold off at least a couple of weeks. Have you had any emails about the car yet? Post a link to your CL ad or a screenshot. With the Oculus, it's hard to follow, are you returning it?

I'd say you're probably overestimating the cost of owning that car. If you have a $1500 repair bill on that thing, you'd be far better off selling it for $500 instead of blowing that sort of money on it.

So here is some round number math for you based upon some numbers you've put out.
$300/month for the camaro * 12 months = $3600
$1000/month into the Corolla * 12 months = $12000
Sale of the sandrail = $500 (perhaps I'm being generous)
Return the Oculus = $350
Sell the camaro for what you paid for = $2000
That ads up to $18,450
Take that amount and subtract the 21k you owe - $2550
Take ~$215 out of your discretionary spending per month, and boom paid off Corolla.

Delay having a 2nd car for all of a year, and cut your discretionary all of $215, and you've paid off the largest debt you currently have. Here is the real kicker of the thing. At the point you've paid the Corolla off, it might still be worth $10k (that's probably low). Buy a cheap car for $2500 when it's paid off, sell off the Corolla, and buy a nice car for $7500.

In one year, you could have two decent cars, and no car debt. Buck up dude.

Same math without the sold car and resulting maintenance (12 month period):

code:

    $1000/month extra into the Corolla * 12 months = $12,000,
    Monthly payment Corolla loan principal (~$289) * 12 = $3,500,
    Sale of the sandrail = $500 (perhaps I'm being generous),
    Return the Oculus = $350

Loan balance = $20714
- Calculations above = $16350
---
Remainder = $4,364

4364 / 12 = 364 // potential discretionary cuts if not selling car
4364 / 15 = 291 // potential discretionary cuts if not selling car

If we could cut $291/mo from discretionary, we could accomplish the same thing without selling the Camaro in 13-15 months instead of 12 (keep reading). Edit: fallacious. This doesn't include 13 months of $1,289. So it would be 12 vs 13? That's a guess. (keep reading)

With selling the Camaro and including the normal principal reduction (your math + principal reduction):

code:

    $18,450 (your calculations)
+    $3,500 (car payment principal reduction)
----------------
    $21,950

So my options appear to be to sell the car off in 12 months with no discretionary cut and selling the Camaro, or to sell the car off in 13-15 months with a discretionary cut (~$291/mo) and keeping the Camaro.

Monthly interest on the car: $221
Difference between your model and mine: $662 (3 months of interest) (keep reading)

Now if we were to have the plan to sell the car, we could potentially make payments for... 5 months @ $1,289 principal reduction, and that should get us to about $1,000 less than Blue Book valuation. Why pay off the car and pay the resulting interest and $250 registration fee if we're going to sell it anyway? If we sold the Camaro, planned to sell the Corolla ASAP, and sold everything else above that you mentioned, this would cut about 3 months off of the 5 months in the first sentence of the paragraph. ~$2,500-$3,100 from the Camaro, $500 for the sand rail, $350 from the Oculus (I can't return it, I have to sell it). We could sell some other things like my electronic drums ($200-$300), my wife's violin ($200-300), a semi-work home theater receiver (HDMI output port needs some finagling to get it t work) ($100), our second TV ($$200-300), and maybe something else. Assuming nothing else, that's $700-$1000.

We could also use a chunk of our emergency fund to do the same. We could potentially be away from the car debt in 1-2 months. However, this brings up the big question of what do we do after that for a car? Saving $7,500 will take another 5-6 months. This problem reigns whether we finish paying off the Corolla, or not, assuming we sell it. Assuming we held off on selling the Corolla until we could buy a third car (in the interim so we can sell the Corolla), that would be another 5-6 months. If we sold the Camaro now that would be what 13-17 months without a car?, plus another month or two of saving for a Camaro replacement again.

Ignoring the what do we drive problem, if we sold the Corolla in 2-3 months, as opposed to paying it off in 12-15 months, we would save $221 * 10 or $221 * 13 ($2,221 to $2873) in interest. $221 being the interest above (payment - principal), and then months. That also doesn't include depreciation. The money saved could also be less if we refinanced when the car is no longer underwater (1-6 months depending on what option we took).

If we got rid of the Corolla, that would free up $1,500 (including the extra $1,000 we're putting towards it) for every other debt we have (sub $10,000), or any other savings goals we had.

So there's some more numbers and my overview on the situation. I don't know what to do with the information.

Aside:
Since you asked for income numbers:

Wife made $1,300 one paycheck, $800 the other (this should explain why I underestimated income so much). We also don't have insurance and 401K pulling out of her paycheck yet, so frankly I have no f'ing clue what her paycheck will be. Assuming it stays similar to JCPenney, it could be around $800/mo. Let's go with $700 to include the 401K and other potential unknowns.

code:

Yearly Net Income:
Me - $2119 * 2 * 12 = $50856
Wife - ($700 * 24) + ($1000 * 2) = $18800 est
----
$69,656 give or take some dollars (this is ridiculous I can't believe we take home that much).
$5805/mo average

code:

Yearly Gross Income:
Me - $62,230
Wife - 13.75 * 40 * 52 + (20 * 52 OT) = $29640

I detailed the outside of the car last night, but it took 2 hours (washed polished and waxed), and then we went grocery shopping. I didn't have time to finish up the Craigslist ad.

Old Fart posted:

Is there a bus stop near your wife's work? Is there one within five or ten miles of your work? You keep saying you'll get to my points later, but you never do. Why are you such a pussy about asking your boss about changing your hours to better work with your child care?

I'm still formulating a plan on the second car as seen above.

My wife isn't taking the bus. Not because we're "better than that" but because it's 1.5 hours to her work, and 1.5 hours back (according to Google Maps bus route thing), plus the time waiting for the bus assuming a misaligned schedule, plus the time it takes for me to drive her to the bus stop both ways (15 minutes 1 way just for her, double that for myself), and the walking time of 1 mile from the nearest bus stop to her work both ways (around 40 minutes total). We talked about it last night, found it to be unreasonable.

edit: tried to remove ambiguity by removing most instances of "car" (replaced with Camaro or Corolla where appropriate).
edit 2: found a fallacy in my discretionary math. There's probably some more; I'll do it again if needed after some option discussion.

Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 17:55 on Sep 30, 2015

# ? Sep 30, 2015 17:28

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# ? May 9, 2024 21:41

Colin Mockery: Jun 24, 2007; Rawr

Has it been long enough since that first "at this rate we'll be debt free by may 2017" post or whatever to get a post-september update to see if that date has moved?

# ? Sep 30, 2015 18:29

April: Jul 3, 2006

Knyteguy posted:

My wife isn't taking the bus. Not because we're "better than that" but because it's 1.5 hours to her work, and 1.5 hours back (according to Google Maps bus route thing), plus the time waiting for the bus assuming a misaligned schedule, plus the time it takes for me to drive her to the bus stop both ways (15 minutes 1 way just for her, double that for myself), and the walking time of 1 mile from the nearest bus stop to her work both ways (around 40 minutes total). We talked about it last night, found it to be unreasonable.

edit: tried to remove ambiguity by removing most instances of "car" (replaced with Camaro or Corolla where appropriate).
edit 2: found a fallacy in my discretionary math. There's probably some more; I'll do it again if needed after some option discussion.

I still don't understand, if you live so close to where you work, why not just have your wife drop you & the baby off in the mornings, and pick you up in the evening? It might mean extra time at work, but that's when you switch to 4x10 hours. Or maybe just do that on days when the weather is too crappy to bike, or you're running late or something. I get wanting a second car, and I can agree with getting one, but why not make it work a less-than-optimal way for a few months while you PLAN to get one?

# ? Sep 30, 2015 18:33

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

Yeah the key lesson is to develop the process that occurs in your brain when you think "I want something". I certainly make impulse purchases and know how "I want something" -> buy it immediately feels. The thing that the thread wants you to work on is the habit. It's not any one impulse purchase, it's the process. You need to use willpower to consciously insert a step into the process, that is, "think about all of the consequences and plan in advance". It won't feel good to do, part of your mind will try to fight it, and you gotta do it anyway. Eventually it will become your new habit, and it won't take willpower to plan purchases in advance any more, but for now you've gotta suffer the negative feelings of not immediately being gratified. It's worth it for your future financial stability and the lessons you impart on your child.

# ? Sep 30, 2015 18:55

BarbarianElephant: Feb 12, 2015; The fairy of forgiveness has removed your red text.

I think it's also important to acknowledge purchases that are actually important. The second car wasn't just a whim. He was talking about it for months. He should have saved up for it and planned which car to get, instead of nobly holding out for months and then completely cracking and getting a sports car, like a failed dieter eating the whole box of cookies. He didn't want to acknowledge that he really wanted a second car because the received wisdom of this thread and the financial independence community is to have *AT MOST* one car. But "financial independence" is a whole lifestyle that you need to buy into much harder than Knyteguy does, in order to make it work.

I think he should stick with the sports car for a bit, because chopping and changing all the time isn't helping him. Don't sell it just to please the thread, Knyteguy. Use it a bit and see if you come to hate the impracticality of it on your own.

# ? Sep 30, 2015 19:16

Old Fart: Jul 25, 2013

Knyteguy posted:

My wife isn't taking the bus.

Okay, but at least you've investigated it and considered the feasibility.

Why won't you answer the question about your childcare schedule? I feel like you're hiding something.

Why won't you consider the idea of working 4x10 so that you're not "stuck" for 15 minutes with the baby in the morning and 45 minutes at night?

Why are you planning for paychecks you've not yet received? How are you not a month ahead already?

WHERE DID THAT $4000 GO?!?

# ? Sep 30, 2015 22:25

Knyteguy: Jul 6, 2005; YES to love
NO to shirts; Toilet Rascal

Horking Delight posted:

Has it been long enough since that first "at this rate we'll be debt free by may 2017" post or whatever to get a post-september update to see if that date has moved?

Should be the same. That's originally an October estimate moving forward.

BarbarianElephant posted:

I think it's also important to acknowledge purchases that are actually important. The second car wasn't just a whim. He was talking about it for months. He should have saved up for it and planned which car to get, instead of nobly holding out for months and then completely cracking and getting a sports car, like a failed dieter eating the whole box of cookies. He didn't want to acknowledge that he really wanted a second car because the received wisdom of this thread and the financial independence community is to have *AT MOST* one car. But "financial independence" is a whole lifestyle that you need to buy into much harder than Knyteguy does, in order to make it work.

I think he should stick with the sports car for a bit, because chopping and changing all the time isn't helping him. Don't sell it just to please the thread, Knyteguy. Use it a bit and see if you come to hate the impracticality of it on your own.

I agree with this post, with the caveat of my post above (ie are the options presented worth selling the Camaro). Getting rid of the Corolla debt is my number one priority. And I guess another caveat that I'm now thinking about is trying to sell the Camaro for $3,100 after seeing basically the exact same car selling for $4,300. I'd be happy as hell to make about $1,000 for a little detail work and some Craigslist presentation. I like the car, but I like another car and $1,000 more. Assuming I could find a buyer at that price, of course.

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

Yeah the key lesson is to develop the process that occurs in your brain when you think "I want something". I certainly make impulse purchases and know how "I want something" -> buy it immediately feels. The thing that the thread wants you to work on is the habit. It's not any one impulse purchase, it's the process. You need to use willpower to consciously insert a step into the process, that is, "think about all of the consequences and plan in advance". It won't feel good to do, part of your mind will try to fight it, and you gotta do it anyway. Eventually it will become your new habit, and it won't take willpower to plan purchases in advance any more, but for now you've gotta suffer the negative feelings of not immediately being gratified. It's worth it for your future financial stability and the lessons you impart on your child.

I've gotten much better about this, except for the plan purchases in advance. With most things now I tend to see something that I would find beneficial, hold off on them for awhile, decide I do want to pick something up... and then I don't budget for it but buy it anyway. I will start implementing that last step. For example Harbor Freight was having a "liquidation" sale this weekend, and I was thinking of picking up a car jack. I thought about just going and getting it right then, but I decided to hold off for a few days to think about it. Now I will be getting a car jack in the near future, but I'll be doing so within the budget. That's what I learned from buying a second car. The budget is a tool to meet my goals; if I can get something I feel I need while meeting my preset goals then that's what I'll do. To clarify I don't buy everything I want either. I've been talking to my wife about buying a Wii U ( :laffo:

) for 2 years now. I do like this post though. I appreciate some insight that's similar to how I think about things sometimes.

April posted:

I still don't understand, if you live so close to where you work, why not just have your wife drop you & the baby off in the mornings, and pick you up in the evening? It might mean extra time at work, but that's when you switch to 4x10 hours. Or maybe just do that on days when the weather is too crappy to bike, or you're running late or something. I get wanting a second car, and I can agree with getting one, but why not make it work a less-than-optimal way for a few months while you PLAN to get one?

I've done it for so long that I'm really tired of it mentally. All I can say is that this is how I'll proceed moving forward. I should have planned back in April or May to buy a car. I've been dealing with this sub-optimal situation for something like 14 months. We could have moved closer to my work, but our rent would have been about $300-$400 more (negating a second car purchase price by far already), and the commute is the smallest problem. OF keeps mentioning having my work work around my child care hours, but my child care hours are the time I go to work, to the time I get off. If I manage to change my schedule to 4x10s (which again isn't my preference) for a few months while I sell my car, there's a good chance I end up watching the baby for 10 hours on Friday. I'd find that rough.

So to paraphrase I'm just... really comfortable with the current situation. I'm not doing this to ruffle everyone's feathers around here or something. I see why the methodology needs to change in the future.

Breetai posted:

1. You need to stop flailing. You have a tendency to make large-scale gut-reaction purchasing decisions, and it torpedoes any incremental progress you make.

2. Following on from this, you need to decide on a fixed budget, make no major changes to your life, and stick to the budget for several months in a row. This is basically the foundation of what should be your ongoing financial discipline, the bedrock upon which your future financial success needs to be laid, and for the last two years you have absolutely not met this very fundamental financial habit without which you will not succeed.

Expanding on my previous diet analogy: you've been on the financial equivalent of a fad diet/binge cycle. You need to reorder your thinking and look at the benefits of a constant lifestyle change instead.

1. Yes.

2. Barring my post above about potentially getting rid of the car debt, yes. We don't plan on moving or breaking this lease when it's up next year (we have another 12 months almost exactly).

Edit: oh I just realized that my $300/mo "maintenance" included fuel and insurance in there. I double dipped in the budget. That frees up $66/mo. I'll just add that to savings for now.

Old Fart posted:

You keep saying you'll get to my points later,

You've gotta realize how difficult it is to hit everyone's points and posts in here. Posts often take me 30+ minutes to write up and error check and clarify (and I generally still miss something). If I missed a point that I said I would get back to you on, just requote it. It's not intentional nor personal, and I try my best to actually reply to people when I say I will do that. I can't always answer tough questions on a whim, and I need time to give them thought. For example on your bus thing I could see where you were going with that, so I spoke with my wife about and researched it before answering you further. And sometimes they're loaded questions that I don't want to answer.

MrEnigma posted:

I can't believe no one has lol'd at the, "I don't need to change my oil often since it burns it and I have to refill it". And replacing an engine/transmission is cheap, just some beer/pizza. Do these things matter really, probably not. But it does imply that the car might not be in as good shape as you said/thought it was and maybe overestimating how easy/simple a large repair could be.

I'm also suspect of the 5k miles a year number. I work from home, rarely drive my car, and I still manage to get 2-3k on it a year.

My biggest issue with the Camaro isn't just how impractical of a car it is for a family, but since it's a v8 it is just more expensive all around. Insurance is more expensive because cylinders + 2 doors, gas mileage is going to be worse, takes more oil, more spark plugs, etc. If you like to stomp on the go pedal, now you are putting new tires on more often, plus wider tires means potentially more expensive tires. A few bucks here and there doesn't cost much, but it does add up.

I wouldn't say it's "cheap", but to put it into perspective: a transmission rebuild costs $1,800 with labor (I got a quote from the 5 star tranny shop in town, because it's good to know). A transmission rebuild kit costs $153 on Amazon. That's cutting off 90% of the cost. My wife's 89 Accord had a new transmission w/ labor quoted at something like $2,500-$3,200 (we sold the car for $500 before it fully went out).

The tires aren't very wide. 215/65r16 96h, which is a thinner tire model than stock I believe. Tires range from roughly $80/ea to $108/ea for all terrain high treadlife warranty ones (I priced them out yesterday when I was calculating car maintenance).

It's not burning oil; there are some gaskets that need to be replaced (so it's leaking oil). I've done quite a bit of mechanical stuff, so I'm pretty sure that with some help and borrowed tools that I can handle most of the maintenance myself. I've changed out a transmission before and stuff, admittedly with a bunch of help.

I'm not too worried about insurance. $16/mo isn't too bad.

All that said, I think you're correct that it will be more expensive than a comparable year 4 cylinder. Good call on the spark plugs. I may tackle that in November if the car isn't sold.

n8r posted:

Because if he does, and makes some reasonable cuts to "discretionary* spending, he can have that car totally paid off and get enough out of the sale of the Corolla to have two nice cars and no debt.

KG has mentioned he has issues buying 'gadgets' with his discretionary, I'd like to hear a sampling of both what he and his wife use that money for. This is $300/month that could be going to things that really benefit KG.

My discretionary:

Don't ask me what that check is I just ate that in my category when importing from the bank. As I said before I tend to do that. I asked my wife to start entering checks into YNAB as she writes them so we know what they are.

UNR/Univ of Nevada stuff was tailgating.

7/11 - energy drinks and cigarettes. Foxatee asked how that's going, well not so well as you can see. I'm already sick of it again so I intend on quitting shortly (30 days or so, I already have that vape pen thing). I ordered some caffeine pills on Amazon, so that cost will be cut tomorrow as well.

ATM withdrawal - went out to a casino with my buddy after that concert. I played $20 in Black Jack and walked away with $25 after a $3 tip to the dealer (I'm not much of a gambler anymore). I still have the winning chips on my kitchen table, so technically that's a wash when I cash them in. ATM fees will be refunded.

Her discretionary:

That $500 thing in August at the top was the envelope system and the attempt to categorize it (we had to make 2 withdrawals IIRC).

Old Fart posted:

I still want to know about that $4000 overage from August.

I don't know how YNAB calculates header data, so I don't pay attention to it. Categories are more meaningful imo.

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

He's talking about giving your current salary to a recruiter I think, from a long time ago. I agree, part of sales is making the other person believe you will walk away, that line conveys the opposite. The implication is you're in a hurry to let it go quick and will be amenable to lowballing. I think you were going for "...and that's why it's so cheap" but that is not the implication I draw from it. It's not a huge deal but yeah, I'd remove that part.

Ah I see. That's still such a tough question to answer. The last interview I had I just said "I'm not going to tell you that". I guess it cut through the bull crap.

Horking Delight posted:

I notice you said you were lowering your discretionary budget but historically you've actually had a lot of trouble staying within your existing one. Thoughts on that?

Well I'm thinking that at least it's higher than anything we've had for a very long time. In the recent past we've ranged from something like $50 to 100 on average. We've gotten really drat close to hitting $75/ea before. One resolution could be combining my wife's and my discretionary. We don't do a whole lot of separate things, so generally we're splitting discretionary, or if we buy something it's something we both have a use for (my wife uses the home theater system more than I do). The tailgate is a good example of that (seen above). If we combined discretionary, we could probably cut this to $200-$250 comfortable (so a $50-$100 decrease). Quitting smoking again would be a requirement here to keep it fair.

in_cahoots posted:

Before we move into October I'd like to understand the September numbers. It looks like another month where, to paraphrase from NPR, every category went over apt he average. You're way over budget in baby, discretionary, restaurants, and groceries, and I don't even think you've mentioned it in the thread. This is nothing new, these overages are pretty much the norm.

Your wife missing a single day from her paycheck would probably affect you by a few hundred bucks at most; you can't blame these numbers on that. So what happened to make you fall back into your old habits?

And I still missed one.

Old habits was just from not paying attention to the budget. My plan was to stop posting in the thread for good, so I lost the sense of accountability. I reevaluated that choice.

The baby stuff though was just a mistake. I think I may have used the average over the past 3 months button for that and I didn't catch it. Edit: No I used "use last month's values" and didn't catch it.

I hit the post above while writing this.

I'm going to say that I hate these long posts, because this will cause a derail of some sort, some how. Or I'll get yelled at for justifying something. Definitely one of the two. I don't want to lose focus on the post at the top of this page. If anything will appease all of you AND myself here, it will be getting rid of that car debt. If I can rid of that in the next 6 months I'll shut the gently caress up about everything and listen to the thread on everything, and never justify a bad purchase again.

I'll go to rice and beans if it means I can be out of the car debt in 6 months!

Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 00:16 on Oct 1, 2015

# ? Sep 30, 2015 22:33

Cicero: Dec 17, 2003; Jumpjet, melta, jumpjet. Repeat for ten minutes or until victory is assured.

quote:

I'll go to rice and beans if it means I can be out of the car debt in 6 months!

Look man, I wanna be supportive of you, but your past behavior indicates that no, you will not do this (I probably couldn't either in your situation). If you can though, great, I will eat my words and buy your kid a toy.

# ? Sep 30, 2015 22:38

April: Jul 3, 2006

Knyteguy posted:

If I manage to change my schedule to 4x10s (which again isn't my preference) for a few months while I sell my car, there's a good chance I end up watching the baby for 10 hours on Friday. I'd find that rough.

Unfuckingbelievable.

# ? Sep 30, 2015 22:49

Knyteguy: Jul 6, 2005; YES to love
NO to shirts; Toilet Rascal

April posted:

Unfuckingbelievable.

My baby can be tough. My grandma won't watch him more than 30 minutes anymore (which allows our child care situation to work before anyone jumps on me about saying how my grandma was helping), because he needs to be held the entire day. My sister has nannied for 10 years now, and she says he's the hardest baby she's ever watched. So it basically means that while watching him my activity is 10 hours of watching TV, which I don't like to do. Playing with him? "gently caress you dad hold me". I was practically a single dad while my wife worked at JCP, so don't judge me. I step up when I need to. On top of all that I generally watch him alone for a few hours a week as it is. It's not a big deal when there's two of us, and one can hold the baby while the other can do such luxurious tasks as "making a sandwich".

I don't expect you guys to understand. I don't care if you guys understand. You guys aren't privy to the information and viewpoint that my family is, I simplified the situation, and this is beyond the scope of finances. I'm not acknowledging this further, because I've said my reasons and this has the potential to get really derailed really quickly.

Edit: and to clarify I love my son more than life itself. I'm not going to listen to people downing on me for an again oversimplification.

Cicero posted:

Look man, I wanna be supportive of you, but your past behavior indicates that no, you will not do this (I probably couldn't either in your situation). If you can though, great, I will eat my words and buy your kid a toy.

I think I could do it. I liked rice and beans last time. I lost 20 lbs and I thought it tasted good. My wife didn't like it. I wouldn't subject her to that again, but if only I did it I don't know what effect this would have on our finances if I did it say, "most" days.

However the "sacrifice" would necessitate a timeline of 6 months to get out of car debt.

Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 23:16 on Sep 30, 2015

# ? Sep 30, 2015 23:08

Cicero: Dec 17, 2003; Jumpjet, melta, jumpjet. Repeat for ten minutes or until victory is assured.

I thought you meant 'rice and beans' in the sense of cutting your overall budget down to the bone, not literally just eating rice and beans.

# ? Sep 30, 2015 23:18

Eris: Mar 20, 2002

Have you looked into a baby ktan or an ergo or something? High needs kids are tough, but those baby carriers can be a hands free godsend.

# ? Sep 30, 2015 23:19

Cicero: Dec 17, 2003; Jumpjet, melta, jumpjet. Repeat for ten minutes or until victory is assured.

Yeah baby wraps/carriers are awesome. Our son was the same way, always wanted to be held, but he was ok being strapped to your body.

# ? Sep 30, 2015 23:21

Knyteguy: Jul 6, 2005; YES to love
NO to shirts; Toilet Rascal

Eris posted:

Have you looked into a baby ktan or an ergo or something? High needs kids are tough, but those baby carriers can be a hands free godsend.

Cicero posted:

Yeah baby wraps/carriers are awesome. Our son was the same way, always wanted to be held, but he was ok being strapped to your body.

I know I've tried it, but I couldn't get it to tie very well. As you said if I could get something hands free that would be absolutely amazing. I'm watching him for an hour after work today, so I'll see if I can get it to work. I'd be happy if I could just internet on the smart phone, make him a bottle easier, make lunch, etc when I'm watching him alone. Having my hands tied up all of the time is very difficult.

In fact I'd probably be willing to ask for 4x10s temporarily if I can get this to work. I'll do a test run today for an hour or so, and then I'll do a test run Saturday for longer to see if it's viable.

Cicero posted:

I thought you meant 'rice and beans' in the sense of cutting your overall budget down to the bone, not literally just eating rice and beans.

Ah, I see. If it could be done in 6 months or less... I'll see what a true bare bones budget would do for the situation this evening or tomorrow. That money freed up on a monthly basis would be awesome for the obvious reasons. We're talking $1,510 in the budget.

# ? Sep 30, 2015 23:42

Baja Mofufu: Feb 7, 2004

My husband watches our baby one day a week and loves the ergo. It's a structured carrier, not a ring sling or wrap you have to tie. Is your wife part of a mom group or do you know one in your area? The mom group I'm part of has baby wearing exchanges and try-ons so you can see which carrier works for you. You might also be able to do that at a consignment store.

# ? Sep 30, 2015 23:50

Knyteguy: Jul 6, 2005; YES to love
NO to shirts; Toilet Rascal

Baja Mofufu posted:

My husband watches our baby one day a week and loves the ergo. It's a structured carrier, not a ring sling or wrap you have to tie. Is your wife part of a mom group or do you know one in your area? The mom group I'm part of has baby wearing exchanges and try-ons so you can see which carrier works for you. You might also be able to do that at a consignment store.

I believe she is on Facebook or something; I'll ask her. I wasn't aware there were multiple styles. Thanks for the heads up.

# ? Sep 30, 2015 23:53

foxatee: Feb 27, 2010; That foxatee is always making a Piggles out of herself.

My kid was the same way. I couldn't get anything done unless she was asleep or someone (my parents or her father) was holding her. It sucked. By the time my husband got home from work, I was just like, "Jeebus glob, help me!" ;__;
Kids can be rough.

# ? Oct 1, 2015 00:23

Eris: Mar 20, 2002

I can't tie anything for poo poo. But ergos and tulas and stuff are amazing. Semi idiot-proof.

# ? Oct 1, 2015 00:26

Knyteguy: Jul 6, 2005; YES to love
NO to shirts; Toilet Rascal

foxatee posted:

My kid was the same way. I couldn't get anything done unless she was asleep or someone (my parents or her father) was holding her. It sucked. By the time my husband got home from work, I was just like, "Jeebus glob, help me!" ;__;
Kids can be rough.

Yep I feel you. I used to tease my wife until I had to watch him by myself for the first time. That was an eye opener to be sure.

Eris posted:

I can't tie anything for poo poo. But ergos and tulas and stuff are amazing. Semi idiot-proof.

Ah OK cool.

There's a consignment-type used baby equipment store I'm looking at here in town where it looks like we can try them on, at least if their website is accurate.

e: I'm sure they're not too expensive. The baby budget has room for this kind of stuff anyway.

Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 00:53 on Oct 1, 2015

# ? Oct 1, 2015 00:36

ITM: Oct 23, 2010

I think our kid is a month or two behind yours, but he's big on the Jolly Jumper and the exersaucer we have. He hates just being put down, but loves to jump and loves chewing on everything on the exersaucer? Have you got things like that for him?

# ? Oct 1, 2015 03:19

SiGmA_X: May 3, 2004; SiGmA_X

I think you should go back and figure out what was missed in August causing the balance to go negative.. To me, it looks like you've been rolling over a lot of negatives. Every month. Bingo, there you go?

Because July's overages were the lowest in number, I started there. I refuse to hand-add the rest.

See how the sum of the overages equals the "Overspent in Jul" at the top of August?? That's how YNAB works. I've been using it for 2yrs, just like you - I should think you know this by now!

I also fully see why you have been hiding the top section of YNAB back in June and before. Don't do that! Data is your friend. Love the data. Even if it is mean to you. What's bugging me the most is I am only seeing $1,575.88 in overages for August - Where did the other $2,617.97 go? You must have some item as hidden on the budget sheet... Look into that. It does *not* just disappear. It means it was an overage and wasn't rolled forward in August. And being I can tie out all of the July overages to the "Overspent in July" number, it clearly means that it occurred only in August.

SiGmA_X fucked around with this message at 05:22 on Oct 1, 2015

# ? Oct 1, 2015 05:07

n8r: Jul 3, 2003; I helped Lowtax become a cyborg and all I got was this lousy avatar

Just because you've not purchased a jack right off the bat, or not purchased a Wii (yet) means you're making a good financial decision. Every dollar that you spend on something like a jack is money that can't be used for paying down your debt, funding your retirement, setting on an emergency fund. Buying something you don't need, when you are not meeting your financial goals is like a double whammy. You've got some dumb item you'll probably not really use much, and it's going to take you that much longer to pay off the car.

I didn't really read all the the mental gymnastics you went through to justify the car, the long and the short of it is that buying the Camaro will make paying off the Corolla take that much longer. I'm done making the whole car argument thing, I hope you continue to think about the expenses this second car will bring.

Onto flexible Spending:

How do you feel about the discretionary spending of you and your wife?

How do you think your grocery and restaurant portion of things is going? Can you explain why you've increased those categories to $550 and $225?

Why are there so many minimart purchases by both you and your wife?

I would contend that outside of the major purchases that are not budgeted for, like the oculus and the camaro, your flexible spending category is the next biggest problem. I haven't looked at your older flex spending categories, but it seems that the budget for your Sept flex is some of the highest I can recall in a long time.

# ? Oct 1, 2015 05:51

Knyteguy: Jul 6, 2005; YES to love
NO to shirts; Toilet Rascal

n8r posted:

I didn't really read all the the mental gymnastics you went through to justify the car, the long and the short of it is that buying the Camaro will make paying off the Corolla take that much longer. I'm done making the whole car argument thing, I hope you continue to think about the expenses this second car will bring.

Bummer. You really should. It has a couple plans in there that involve what you were saying and more. I wrote keep reading like 5 times because I knew that I looked like I was justifying the car at first and ignoring the rest.

Early ill post more later.

# ? Oct 1, 2015 14:35

n8r: Jul 3, 2003; I helped Lowtax become a cyborg and all I got was this lousy avatar

I read through your post, and here are a few thoughts on what you've been looking at. The main issue with my assumptions and yours is that you can control your discretionary spending. One surefire way to help control that discretionary is with that single payment on the Corolla. You've got a bunch of options down the road with when/if you sell the Corolla. If you think you could survive with the Camaro for a few weeks after you sell the Corolla to let you find a 2nd car, whatever go for it.

Here is how I would propose your budget:
$5500/month
2500 fixed
500 savings
800 flexible
1000 Corolla
200 other debts

This puts you at $5000. Any excess income beyond that goes into savings. When appropriate you chunk off savings into the Corolla principle. Don't worry about what you'll do when the Corolla is paid off, just actually manage to stick to the budget. Set rules for the savings, what things do you take money out of savings for?

To me, this is what a budget looks like, if you want to break down the categories you spent on at the end of the month, go for it. The budget should really exist at a pretty macro level. Withdraw $400 for flex on the first of the month, withdraw $400 on the 15th. Flex spending doesn't exceed $800. No excuses, no bullshit justifications. $800 is all that goes out the door for your flex spending.

# ? Oct 1, 2015 17:28

dreesemonkey: May 14, 2008; Pillbug

I've got a way shittier version of this kind of child carrier I got at a yardsale for $2 and my daughter and I both love it. She loves being "up and around" and I have hands free to do whatever. Often she's perfectly content with me just doing normal household chores type stuff or going for a walk or playing outside with my son.

We also had one of those front baby bjorn things and it was ok but much much less comfortable to wear. Check craigslist or local facebook groups and you can probably get a good deal on one of the hiking type carriers if that's what you're looking for. Now that I have one I'd probably pay $100 for one knowing how useful it is, but I can't justify buying a nicer one when the $2 one is perfectly serviceable (though the padding could be better).

# ? Oct 1, 2015 21:05

imabanana: May 26, 2006

On the subject of financial independence, it's ok to not want that, at least the way it is commonly presented (i.e. usually via ultra frugality.)

Personally, I want to save and make a big chunk of money for security purposes, but I see financial independence blogs where people call themselves retired with like $200k because they are ultra frugal and I don't really want to live like that.

I also work for myself - if I were punching a clock I might feel differently.

Another point is that FI honestly doesn't work unless it's a hobby unto itself. KG, flip through this blog I came across recently: http://www.frugalwoods.com/

This is a very healthy, seemingly well adjusted couple who spend almost nothing because it's clearly like a game and it's fun to them. Literally, it's one of their top hobbies.

It's an exceedingly rare person that has that mindset, and I really do think that's ok. You can still do great things in life and do well financially without being that much of an outlier. Making peace with good enough has helped me, it might help you also.

I think it relates to what someone said upthread about you being stoic about a car for so long and then buying a sports car like a diet gone horribly wrong, and I think if you were more chill about not being perfect that sort of thing might not happen? I could be wrong.

# ? Oct 1, 2015 21:18

Nail Rat: Dec 29, 2000; You maniacs! You blew it up! God damn you! God damn you all to hell!!

Financial independence doesn't have to be hardcore frugality. MMM spends like 25k a year, and he owns his property outright. 2k+ spent per month is a very far cry from extreme frugality when you don't have a house payment or an HOA payment.

# ? Oct 1, 2015 21:29

My Rhythmic Crotch: Jan 13, 2011

How could you "retire" with $200k saved unless you were like, 75 years old?

# ? Oct 2, 2015 02:28

Cicero: Dec 17, 2003; Jumpjet, melta, jumpjet. Repeat for ten minutes or until victory is assured.

My Rhythmic Crotch posted:

How could you "retire" with $200k saved unless you were like, 75 years old?

Maybe if you're living in the woods and being a cannibal like Shia LaBeouf?

# ? Oct 2, 2015 03:02

imabanana: May 26, 2006

This is who I was referencing: http://www.dividendmantra.com/

I believe he supplements his (fairly meager) dividends with freelance writing and what his blog earns, so I guess semi-retired really.

# ? Oct 2, 2015 04:08

My Rhythmic Crotch: Jan 13, 2011

Talk about living on the edge: make your income day trading, blogging, and writing. This guy is not independant any more than I am.

# ? Oct 2, 2015 04:45

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

imabanana posted:

This is who I was referencing: http://www.dividendmantra.com/

I believe he supplements his (fairly meager) dividends with freelance writing and what his blog earns, so I guess semi-retired really.

I'm glad that guy has a whole website devoted to telling us about a bunch of times the stocks he held went down in price by paying dividends.

# ? Oct 2, 2015 05:39

Old Fart: Jul 25, 2013

Knyteguy posted:

I don't know how YNAB calculates header data, so I don't pay attention to it.

It's a complicated system of taking what you've budgeted and subtracting what you've spent. So that means you spent $4000 more than you budgeted that month. It also takes into account money you budgeted from previous months. So if you save for a purchase and put it in a category, it won't show as overspending even if you spend more than that month's income.

You should be showing $4000 in red numbers in your categories that month. It should be very clear. You're hiding something.

On another point, every bank I've used for the past 15 years allows me to look up online the checks I've written. Actual images.

If you actually learn how to budget and save, then you CAN just pick up a tire iron when you need one and see it on sale, because you'll have built up savings in your car maintenance category. That's like the exact opposite of buying a $2000 muscle car completely outside of your budget and borrowing from your future self. Which one of these sounds more independent and liberating to you? The flexibility to do what you want without worry, or repeatedly screwing your future self over? But no, gently caress you, I won't do what you tell me.

I hope someone else has addressed the point of you not wanting to spend half a day with your own child.

Old Fart fucked around with this message at 14:25 on Oct 2, 2015

# ? Oct 2, 2015 12:08

Old Fart: Jul 25, 2013

Knyteguy posted:

I used to tease my wife until I had to watch him by myself for the first time.

Wow, you're a real charmer. It's a testament to her self control that you didn't get murdered.

Yeah, I get it, babies are hard. It's incredibly frustrating when they won't settle down and you don't have hands free. I just don't understand how you've gone 10 months without learning how to wear him and investigating options. I had difficulty with my moby wrap when my daughter was 2 weeks old and it bummed me out so I watched YouTube videos and a couple of weeks later I finally got it. I've looked at Tulas and Ergos and those awesome rigid frame baby carrying backpacks. I also know that quality is not cheap when it comes to carrying your child without destroying your back.

It's just... listing "then I'd have to spend more time with my baby" as a reason against being home more? That's hosed up, dude. I know you don't think it is because you always have a reason for everything, but goddamn.

You don't get a WiiU, so stop thinking about it. You're sitting this console generation out. You know why? BECAUSE YOU HAVE A BABY! You know why else? BECAUSE YOU'RE IN DEBT DUE TO YOUR OWN POOR DECISIONS WITH MONEY! How many toys do you need? You JUST bought a stupid car and a stupid tech gadget. Make THOSE your hobby. Let your child watch you fiddling with mechanical stuff instead of punching buttons staring slack-jawed at a screen.

# ? Oct 2, 2015 14:37

Knyteguy: Jul 6, 2005; YES to love
NO to shirts; Toilet Rascal

Old Fart posted:

Wow, you're a real charmer. It's a testament to her self control that you didn't get murdered.

Yeah, I get it, babies are hard. It's incredibly frustrating when they won't settle down and you don't have hands free. I just don't understand how you've gone 10 months without learning how to wear him and investigating options. I had difficulty with my moby wrap when my daughter was 2 weeks old and it bummed me out so I watched YouTube videos and a couple of weeks later I finally got it. I've looked at Tulas and Ergos and those awesome rigid frame baby carrying backpacks. I also know that quality is not cheap when it comes to carrying your child without destroying your back.

It's just... listing "then I'd have to spend more time with my baby" as a reason against being home more? That's hosed up, dude. I know you don't think it is because you always have a reason for everything, but goddamn.

It's admitted that it's tough to watch a baby, and then I hear it's hosed up that I may want to ruffle some feathers at work to try to do it? It's important to understand that I work slightly more than 40 hours a week as it is? I also did up to 40 hours a week of solo baby watching on top of my full time job when the baby had colic, and I had no car. My wife has had a new job for a month now. I've earned a little bit of a break when there's an option to do so. We have different babies and schedules man.

Re: teasing - As you know every relationship is different. My wife and I tease each other all the time.

Lay off me on this. I noted above that some people made some suggestions and I said I'll look into it. I think a lot of people understand it's incredibly difficult watching babies, but don't want to admit it because society. I will do everything in my power to provide my son with a good life, with good emotional support from myself, and by providing him with the tools he needs to succeed, starting with us paying off this Corolla debt. I'm in it to win it with this car this time.

Old Fart posted:

You don't get a WiiU, so stop thinking about it. You're sitting this console generation out. You know why? BECAUSE YOU HAVE A BABY! You know why else? BECAUSE YOU'RE IN DEBT DUE TO YOUR OWN POOR DECISIONS WITH MONEY! How many toys do you need? You JUST bought a stupid car and a stupid tech gadget. Make THOSE your hobby. Let your child watch you fiddling with mechanical stuff instead of punching buttons staring slack-jawed at a screen.

Something I've come to understand throughout this entire thread and process:
Logically understanding something is unnecessary does not get rid of an emotional want. If that were the case, and since we're on topic, no one would make a choice have a baby, and many more people would adopt. I suppose that adds "biological want" as well, but you get my point. Sometimes that emotional want for X should be fulfilled. To quote an account executive I met from Ethiopia - "We're human. We like new things." It just needs to be done responsibly, and of course it should be analyzed to see if one really wants or needs it, or if it's a passing impulse. Sometimes saying to no to something you really want can strengthen you, but sometimes it's appropriate to give in. I've even seen MMM fall into this (Macbook).

It's either that or the budget is not what everyone is saying it is. Do I use the budget to hit my goals in the time period I want, or do I say screw all wants and cut every unnecessary expenditure from my life? Because I'm about to get really serious with the budgeting thing. I'm not even talking about the Wii U here. I'm talking about things in general.

Sorry guys I'll get to everyone else's posts shortly. I was a little emotionally drained yesterday for some reason.

Edit: cleaned up my reasoning. I believe I came off unintentionally cold.

Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 16:41 on Oct 2, 2015

# ? Oct 2, 2015 15:52

April: Jul 3, 2006

Knyteguy posted:

It's admitted that it's tough to watch a baby, and then I hear it's hosed up that I may want to ruffle some feathers at work to try to do it? It's important to understand that I work slightly more than 40 hours a week as it is? I also did up to 40 hours a week of solo baby watching on top of my full time job when the baby had colic, and I had no car. My wife has had a new job for a month now. I've earned a little bit of a break when there's an option to do so. We have different babies and schedules man.

Re: teasing - As you know every relationship is different. My wife and I tease each other all the time.

Lay off me on this. I noted above that some people made some suggestions and I said I'll look into it. I think a lot of people understand it's incredibly difficult watching babies, but don't want to admit it because society. I will do everything in my power to provide my son with a good life, with good emotional support from myself, and by providing him with the tools he needs to succeed, starting with us paying off this Corolla debt. I'm in it to win it with this car this time.

"I did X and it was really hard so now I am allowed to do Y regardless of whether it's helping me meet my goals or not BECAUSE REASONS." Do you get that this has been THIS ENTIRE THREAD? I'm not saying that you're right or wrong in your scheduling/not wanting to deal with your baby, but do you seriously not see that you do this EVERY TIME something comes up that you don't want to do?

quote:

Something I've come to understand throughout this entire thread and process:
Logically understanding something is frivolous or unnecessary does not get rid of an emotional want. If that were the case, and since we're on topic, no one would make a choice have a baby, and many more people would adopt. I suppose that adds "biological want" as well, but you get my point. I think sometimes the emotional "I want this stuff" demon needs to be fed. To quote an account executive I met from Ethiopia - "We're human. We like new things." It just needs to be done responsibly, and of course it should be analyzed to see if one really wants it, or if it's a passing impulse. I've even seen MMM fall into this (Macbook).

It's either that or the budget is not what everyone is saying it is. Do I use the budget to hit my goals in the time period I want, or do I say screw all wants and cut every unnecessary expenditure from my life? Because I'm about to get really serious with the budgeting thing. I'm not even talking about the Wii U here. I'm talking about things in general.

Sorry guys I'll get to everyone else's posts shortly. I was a little emotionally drained yesterday for some reason.

"And now I'm going to buckle down and deprive myself of things I want and make myself miserable so I can blow it all up again in a couple of months. I MEAN IT THIS TIME." .... and this is the other half of THIS ENTIRE THREAD.

# ? Oct 2, 2015 15:59

Old Greg: Jun 16, 2008

Knyteguy posted:

I will do everything in my power to provide my son with a good life, with good emotional support from myself, and by providing him with the tools he needs to succeed, starting with us paying off this Corolla debt. I'm in it to win it with this car this time.

I just want you to really sit back and think here: what's materially changed this time? A month ago you were going to swear off the thread for good. Even if that was a thought you had for all of 5 minutes, you were there. Now you are considering a bare-bones budget, or really trimming down certain categories. What has changed from before?

You, and us as a thread, have been here before. You have, to date, not gotten the major successes you wanted from plans to go extreme with your savings. I completely, 100% believe you, that you're pumped and ready to go crazy tackling your debt right now. I also believe you were serious and ready to sacrifice before in this thread. When you moved into a too-small apartment, I believe you were 1,000% committed to making that work to eradicate your debt. And it didn't. It didn't work for you. It does not lead to the success you want, and often leads to impulse decisions that involve a lot of money.

Is there something materially different in you as a person or how you'll approach this goal that was completely different or lacking for the past two years?

April posted:

"And now I'm going to buckle down and deprive myself of things I want and make myself miserable so I can blow it all up again in a couple of months. I MEAN IT THIS TIME." .... and this is the other half of THIS ENTIRE THREAD.

Something the thread was discussing a few months back was going six months making NO major purchases unless literal emergency. And I don't think there's any healthier goal you could aim for Knyteguy, to try to shake the loop of "Major life things are happening! I'll do my best to not spend money on it but MAJOR LIFE poo poo IS HAPPENING AND IT CAME OUTTA NOWHERE AND I GOTTA HANDLE IT."

# ? Oct 2, 2015 16:11

Old Fart: Jul 25, 2013

Knyteguy posted:

It's admitted that it's tough to watch a baby, and then I hear it's hosed up that I may want to ruffle some feathers at work to try to do it?

Is that sentence missing a word?

This is an example of your thinking, tho. I said it was hosed up to list "I'd have to watch the baby" as a reason not to change your schedule. Ruffling feathers is a different bullet point on that pros/cons list.

Knyteguy posted:

Re: teasing - As you know every relationship is different. My wife and I tease each other all the time.

Well then your wife is a strong lady to take post-partum teasing about how easy she's got it.

Knyteguy posted:

I think a lot of people understand it's incredibly difficult watching babies, but don't want to admit it because society.

Do we live in the same society? Everybody understands and admits that babies are incredibly difficult and emotionally draining. That's like in the top five list when talking about newborns. That's why it's insane that there's no family leave in the US.

Knyteguy posted:

Do I use the budget to hit my goals in the time period I want, or do I say screw all wants and cut every unnecessary expenditure from my life? Because I'm about to get really serious with the budgeting thing.

Oh NOW you're about to get serious? You've been saying this off and on for two years. Proof is in the pudding.

# ? Oct 2, 2015 16:59

Knyteguy: Jul 6, 2005; YES to love
NO to shirts; Toilet Rascal

Old Fart posted:

Is that sentence missing a word?

Yeah that's a little confusing.

"It's admitted that it's tough to watch a baby, and then I hear that I should ruffle some feathers at work to explicitly put myself into that situation? It's important to understand that I work slightly more than 40 hours a week as it is? I also did up to 40 hours a week of solo baby watching on top of my full time job when the baby had colic, and I had no car. My wife has had a new job for a month now. I've earned a little bit of a break when there's an option to do so. We have different babies and schedules man."

I wish I were perfect, because then I could say "Heck yeah I'll watch the baby all of the time no problem", but I'm not. As I said though if I can get a wrap or carrier to work then I'll definitely be more willing to consider the situation.

Thinking on the rest of the points brought up.

# ? Oct 2, 2015 17:10

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# ? May 9, 2024 21:41

Old Fart: Jul 25, 2013

Knyteguy posted:

I wish I were perfect, because then I could say "Heck yeah I'll watch the baby all of the time no problem", but I'm not. As I said though if I can get a wrap or carrier to work then I'll definitely be more willing to consider the situation.

Good thing nobody is asking you for all the time, then. My point still stands. I know you quoted your correction, but my response was based on the assumption there was a typo.

# ? Oct 2, 2015 17:48

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Business, Finance, and Careers > Knyteguy's Finances: More harebrained schemes than a sitcom dad

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