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Norns
Nov 21, 2011

Senior Shitposting Strategist

BM Farhtz posted:

Never stop burgin'




So loving would.
Nicely done

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Polio Vax Scene
Apr 5, 2009



I feel like I would immediately get burg-stuff all over my shirt as soon as I bit into that, and I wouldn't care

Fenrir
Apr 26, 2005

I found my kendo stick, bitch!

Lipstick Apathy

BM Farhtz posted:

Never stop burgin'



I'd eat the gently caress out of that.

Then dip fries or tater tots in all those drippings on the plate.

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fun Shoe

BM Farhtz posted:

Never stop burgin'



MY DUDEEEEEEEEE

Force de Fappe
Nov 7, 2008

the urge to burge

Jamsta
Dec 16, 2006

Oh you want some too? Fuck you!

BM Farhtz posted:

Never stop burgin'



ffffffff

beerinator
Feb 21, 2003
Here's the Red Hot Ranch double cheese burger from RHR in Chicago. There's two of these places and only the location on Ashland does burgers.



And boy do they do the smash burger/fast food burger very well. Fries are awesome too. What you're seeing in this picture was five dollars worth of awesome lunch.

The Midniter
Jul 9, 2001

beerinator posted:

Here's the Red Hot Ranch double cheese burger from RHR in Chicago. There's two of these places and only the location on Ashland does burgers.



And boy do they do the smash burger/fast food burger very well. Fries are awesome too. What you're seeing in this picture was five dollars worth of awesome lunch.

gently caress

GnarlyCharlie4u
Sep 23, 2007

I have an unhealthy obsession with motorcycles.

Proof

The Midniter posted:

gently caress

I'd rather eat it. But yeah, it does look tempting enough...

a whole buncha crows
May 8, 2003

WHEN WE DON'T KNOW WHO TO HATE, WE HATE OURSELVES.-SA USER NATION (AKA ME!)

beerinator posted:

Here's the Red Hot Ranch double cheese burger from RHR in Chicago. There's two of these places and only the location on Ashland does burgers.



And boy do they do the smash burger/fast food burger very well. Fries are awesome too. What you're seeing in this picture was five dollars worth of awesome lunch.

yes

Proust Malone
Apr 4, 2008

beerinator posted:

Here's the Red Hot Ranch double cheese burger from RHR in Chicago. There's two of these places and only the location on Ashland does burgers.



And boy do they do the smash burger/fast food burger very well. Fries are awesome too. What you're seeing in this picture was five dollars worth of awesome lunch.

That doesn't really look that good, but I bet it's tasty as gently caress.

Norns
Nov 21, 2011

Senior Shitposting Strategist

Your eyeballs are broken

Jamsta
Dec 16, 2006

Oh you want some too? Fuck you!

beerinator posted:

Here's the Red Hot Ranch double cheese burger from RHR in Chicago. There's two of these places and only the location on Ashland does burgers.



And boy do they do the smash burger/fast food burger very well. Fries are awesome too. What you're seeing in this picture was five dollars worth of awesome lunch.

gonna do some homemade fries and burg tonight in honour of that

Jamsta
Dec 16, 2006

Oh you want some too? Fuck you!

I cheaped out on the fries.. and need to work on my smash skillz, more flatness required...

Flash Gordon Ramsay
Sep 28, 2004

Grimey Drawer

Jamsta posted:

I cheaped out on the fries.. and need to work on my smash skillz, more flatness required...



It helps to have the meat room temperature. I use a big round metal spatula and then another spatula that i can press straight down with to smash it as much as possible. I use 80% lean, measured into 4oz portions. Some folks do 3oz or even smaller patties.

Jamsta
Dec 16, 2006

Oh you want some too? Fuck you!

Flash Gordon Ramsay posted:

It helps to have the meat room temperature. I use a big round metal spatula and then another spatula that i can press straight down with to smash it as much as possible. I use 80% lean, measured into 4oz portions. Some folks do 3oz or even smaller patties.

I'll try the room temp next time, though I thought warm beef is harder to shape?

I underestimated how much a smashed burger expands... needs to be real flat...

Flash Gordon Ramsay
Sep 28, 2004

Grimey Drawer

Jamsta posted:

I'll try the room temp next time, though I thought warm beef is harder to shape?

I underestimated how much a smashed burger expands... needs to be real flat...

I portion it and roll it into balls while it's cold, then set it out an hour or so before I'm ready to cook to come up to room temp.

edit: The spatula I use looks like this one. It's bendy though, so I have to press straight down on the flat part with something else to get full smashage. http://www.foodservicewarehouse.com/browne-foodservice/574384/p1354981.aspx

Fenrir
Apr 26, 2005

I found my kendo stick, bitch!

Lipstick Apathy
Get a tough steel spatula, it helps. Then use another object to press down on it, like a mason jar.

Jamsta
Dec 16, 2006

Oh you want some too? Fuck you!

Flash Gordon Ramsay posted:

I portion it and roll it into balls while it's cold, then set it out an hour or so before I'm ready to cook to come up to room temp.

edit: The spatula I use looks like this one. It's bendy though, so I have to press straight down on the flat part with something else to get full smashage. http://www.foodservicewarehouse.com/browne-foodservice/574384/p1354981.aspx

That makes sense. I've got a solid metal spatula for pressing which seems to work well, just need to use more force. It just had a tendency to stick to the cutting board - which I imagine the warmer temp will help?

Flash Gordon Ramsay
Sep 28, 2004

Grimey Drawer
Cutting board? No, you put the ball of meat in the hot skillet and press it there that's what helps get the char.

Jamsta
Dec 16, 2006

Oh you want some too? Fuck you!

Flash Gordon Ramsay posted:

Cutting board? No, you put the ball of meat in the hot skillet and press it there that's what helps get the char.

I didn't know that made all the difference, will try that next time :D

Flash Gordon Ramsay
Sep 28, 2004

Grimey Drawer

Jamsta posted:

I didn't know that made all the difference, will try that next time :D

Just put the ball in the screaming hot skillet and smash. Repeat with the next one. If you wait to smash them, then you risk squeezing out burger juice and that's bad.

Also, don't go leaner than 80%, they won't smash as well.

Gwaihir
Dec 8, 2009
Hair Elf

Jamsta posted:

I didn't know that made all the difference, will try that next time :D

Hahaha, oh man your mind is going to be blown now.

I own and love this guy http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003AQAYKC for all my burg smashing needs. It's gigantic so you get good coverage, sturdy as gently caress, and has a nice edge on it for easy scraping and flipping.

Only downside is that it's just a bit too large for smaller pans (Like say 8 inch skillets), so it can be a little bit awkward if you're trying to use it for a normal spatula in a crowded pan like that.
On the other hand it's absolutely perfect for dealing with huge chunks of meat, like if you're searing a big cut of brisket off or doing big steaks.

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Remember, when you smash that burg... let it make love to the surface. Don't flip it until it smells right. Trust your nose.

coyo7e
Aug 23, 2007

by zen death robot
^^^ That doesn't make sense. "Don't cook until you smell it - trust your nose"

GnarlyCharlie4u posted:

You poor sad sons-of-bitches that don't have Hardee's...



Tex mex burger, but they ran out of peppers so I got jalapeno poppers instead.
That looks to be a Carl's Jr bag. Also that patty looks dry as gently caress, lovely bun, the tomato's not even ripe. A 9-dollar six-dollar burger?

Fenrir
Apr 26, 2005

I found my kendo stick, bitch!

Lipstick Apathy

Gwaihir posted:

Hahaha, oh man your mind is going to be blown now.

I own and love this guy http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003AQAYKC for all my burg smashing needs. It's gigantic so you get good coverage, sturdy as gently caress, and has a nice edge on it for easy scraping and flipping.

Only downside is that it's just a bit too large for smaller pans (Like say 8 inch skillets), so it can be a little bit awkward if you're trying to use it for a normal spatula in a crowded pan like that.
On the other hand it's absolutely perfect for dealing with huge chunks of meat, like if you're searing a big cut of brisket off or doing big steaks.


My dude, get yourself one of these http://www.amazon.com/Lodge-L10SK3-Pre-Seasoned-Skillet-12-Inch/dp/B00006JSUB

Smash two burgers at a time, and melt cheese between them. It's heavenly. Just do away with the silly "pre-seasoning" with steel wool and season it yourself first.

treehaus
Jul 31, 2013

Fenrir posted:

My dude, get yourself one of these http://www.amazon.com/Lodge-L10SK3-Pre-Seasoned-Skillet-12-Inch/dp/B00006JSUB

Smash two burgers at a time, and melt cheese between them. It's heavenly. Just do away with the silly "pre-seasoning" with steel wool and season it yourself first.

This man knows his smash-tools.

Che Delilas
Nov 23, 2009
FREE TIBET WEED

coyo7e posted:

^^^ That doesn't make sense. "Don't cook until you smell it - trust your nose"

That looks to be a Carl's Jr bag. Also that patty looks dry as gently caress, lovely bun, the tomato's not even ripe. A 9-dollar six-dollar burger?

They renamed them Thickburgers a while ago, I'm sure to get around the whole thing about their six-dollar burger concept being economically obsolete.

GnarlyCharlie4u
Sep 23, 2007

I have an unhealthy obsession with motorcycles.

Proof

coyo7e posted:


That looks to be a Carl's Jr bag. Also that patty looks dry as gently caress, lovely bun, the tomato's not even ripe. A 9-dollar six-dollar burger?

Carls's Jr = Hardee's.
The tomato was ripe, it was just yellow.
The patty was actually pretty juicy.

The burger was definitely enjoyable, or it wouldn't have gotten posted. I am picky about my burgs.

As far as smash tools go, I like to cook them in a cast iron skillet and use another skillet to smash them, but what works even better (and is easier to clean) is steak-irons.

Tyson Tomko
May 8, 2005

The Problem Solver.

Che Delilas posted:

They renamed them Thickburgers a while ago, I'm sure to get around the whole thing about their six-dollar burger concept being economically obsolete.

Also they still have the original Six Dollar Burger (their first thickburger they released way back in the early 2000s when I worked there still in high school) and it's pretty good, just may or may not be on the official menu anymore. Just a big thick patty, red onions, bread and butter pickles, cheese, and a lot of mess. Dollar for dollar it's not the best but you can do worse for sure.

Fenrir
Apr 26, 2005

I found my kendo stick, bitch!

Lipstick Apathy

BM Farhtz posted:

This man knows his smash-tools.

Eh, it's not that complicated, I just knew I wanted to be able to do two at once so I could precisely time the cheese melting and get a thick slab of colby jack between two crusty smashed patties. If you stack them together for just a little bit and then flip them you can get cheese blankets over both sides, although it's tricky. If you try this for too long you can overcook the patties.

That's definitely my favorite skillet for it though. Just don't be a moron like me and try to do it with the whole "pre-seasoned" poo poo. In fact, NEVER trust a pre-seasoned cast iron pan. Scour that fucker hard with steel wool and wear it down to black. Then pour in olive oil and cover every surface with it, bake it, then repeat this process again. Then you've got a real seasoned skillet.

Fenrir fucked around with this message at 23:34 on Oct 16, 2015

Norns
Nov 21, 2011

Senior Shitposting Strategist

I wouldn't season with olive oil. Use flaxseed oil.

Fenrir
Apr 26, 2005

I found my kendo stick, bitch!

Lipstick Apathy

Norns posted:

I wouldn't season with olive oil. Use flaxseed oil.

Eh, I like olive oil because it's thicker and seasons the iron harder, but also it is more neutral in flavor when it comes to things you want to cook on it. Then again I also sear my meatballs and any kind of chicken I use on pasta in the same pan so it has many purposes.

Now, if you're talking longevity, I do agree that a flaxseed season would last longer. Although that might be because you'd cook fewer things on it. I'd rather have an olive oil seasoned pan for ten times as many things as I'd use a flax seasoned pan for.

Fenrir fucked around with this message at 00:44 on Oct 17, 2015

Gwaihir
Dec 8, 2009
Hair Elf
What? Olive oil isn't a neutral flavored oil, but even if it was, the seasoning on a pan doesn't have anything to do with how the food made in it tastes. Like, if you seasoned it correctly, that poo poo is polymerized to the iron. Once it's seasoned you don't really need to re-season it unless you steel wool it up or let tomato sauce it in it for hours.

I mean, yea, you rub that sucker down with oil of whatever type (I usually use olive oil since that's what's handy) after washing and drying it, but that's not really the same as the seasoning on a pan.

Fenrir
Apr 26, 2005

I found my kendo stick, bitch!

Lipstick Apathy
So, are you saying it doesn't really matter what oil you use for the seasoning? I mean, that would be news to me. I'm not saying you're wrong, I just really didn't know that. Hell, I've just always used olive oil because that's what my mom and grandma did. I really thought there was a specific purpose for it, like cooking certain meats and etc.

poo poo, I thought the oil you season with actually does affect the food but that may really just be superstition.

Fenrir fucked around with this message at 06:34 on Oct 17, 2015

coyo7e
Aug 23, 2007

by zen death robot
We have a cast iron thread for a reason. That reason is to teach you to season your cast iron with 2 lbs of bacon.

Olive Oil's smoke point is really low as well.

Fender Anarchist
May 20, 2009

Fender Anarchist

when im smashin burgers i use 2 oz patties same as steak n shake (makes sense, 2 patties = 1/4 pound, p standard burg size just with more crispy) and i just use a normal spatula with a big heavy meat fork to press it down hard w/o bending the handle

also when you stick the ball in let it cook for like 30s before you flip, then smash; the cooked bit with rendered fat helps prevent the burg stickin to the spatula, while the fresh meat on the other side glues to the pan a bit. then do maye 45s, flip again, 45s, done.

Jamsta
Dec 16, 2006

Oh you want some too? Fuck you!

Been busy the last day, just caught up on the posts - thanks for all the advice. I'd been making quite a few incorrect assumptions smashing.

Ordering a cheaper but still decent cast iron skillet and steak iron, to see how I get started. To be fair any cook should have those anyway and I've been prevaricating too long.

Will post results back here later - cheers!

beerinator
Feb 21, 2003
Getting wild on a Friday night with this simple bacon cheeseburger.

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Jamsta
Dec 16, 2006

Oh you want some too? Fuck you!

beerinator posted:

Getting wild on a Friday night with this simple bacon cheeseburger.



that bacon look sexy as hell

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