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You guys chose to beat up Butters. I hope you're happy with yourselves.
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Oct 19, 2015 21:31
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berryjon posted:You guys chose to beat up Butters. I hope you're happy with yourselves. We're dicks... <pauses for dramatic tension> We're stupid, reckless and arrogant dicks! And the Wood Elves... are pussies. And Catman is an rear end in a top hat. Pussies don't like dicks because pussies get hosed by dicks <another small pause for dramatic effect> But dicks also gently caress assholes, assholes who just want to poo poo over everything. Pussies think they can deal with assholes their way, but the only thing that can gently caress an rear end in a top hat is a dick... with some balls. The problem with dicks is that sometimes they gently caress too much, or gently caress when it's not appropriate. And it takes a pussy to show them that, but sometimes pussies becomes so full of poo poo that they become assholes themselves. Because pussies, is only an inch and a half away from an rear end in a top hat. I don't know much about this crazy crazy world, but I do know, that if you don't let us gently caress this rear end in a top hat <points at Cartman> our dicks and pussies will all be covered in poo poo. Yes... I went there...
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Oct 19, 2015 21:48
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Oh geez the next night time sequence is coming up. I forgot all about it...it's epic.
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Oct 19, 2015 23:26
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Heir03 posted:Oh geez the next night time sequence is coming up. I forgot all about it...it's epic.
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Oct 19, 2015 23:53
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I feel just fine about making you beat up Butters, because last time I went through, I chose the KKK's side. Also, I want to see you in the full costume you find in the next section! That costume's hella rad. TERRIBLE to play in, but fun.
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Oct 20, 2015 01:04
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Even though this game is full of children doing a violence to each other, I still like when they can pull out a line like "you're too late" with a more innocent meaning.
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Oct 20, 2015 06:49
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Yeah, I was expecting the nazi zombie apocalypse (as ineffective as it has been so far), not concerned parents. 
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Oct 20, 2015 12:49
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I was in tears during the second part of the wizard fight, trapped by being unable to win the QTE because I was laughing too hard.
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Oct 20, 2015 16:14
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I believe it was in the very first trailer that they showed New Kid in a fart battle with Cartman and as soon as i saw that i knew i had to make that happen somehow when the full game came out. I was not disappointed 
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Oct 21, 2015 04:58
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Hello everyone. Let's check in on Douchebag. He had a big day and must be pretty tired. Aww, he's sleeping.  I wonder what he's dreaming about...Let's take a closer look.  Feel free to insert the appropriate "doodly doo" sound effects.  Douchebag is apparently dreaming about Kupa Keep.  I'm first gonna warn you all, this update is gonna have a lot of words. Remember all that faction specific dialogue from the last two updates? Well today we're looking at the KKK side of things and it's all in a single update. So grab some snacks because this is gonna take a while...  : Ah, you have returned! Come, Sir Douchebag, it is time to summon our forces! Simply call them here and your dedication to Kupa Keep will be complete!: Climb the signal tower, Sir Douchebag. Call forth your new recruits!Video:    : Everyone gather round! : While the rest of you have been picking your respective arses, Sir Douchebag has gone out and brought help to our kingdom. Sir Douchebag, it is time to give you a title worthy of your deeds.  : By the power of Mandaloth, third-born of the Redguard, and by the glory of Christ, I hereby anoint thee -- COMMANDER DOUCHEBAG! With all the rights and privileges accompanied therein!   : Eric! ERIC! (out of breath) We know where the elves are hiding the Stick!: What? Really?: We just intercepted their messages on Twitter!: You mean you shot down their message raven.: R-right - w-we shot down their raven a-and the evil Elf King ha-has hidden the Stick inside his desk at school! : Of course! Kyle hid it in his desk! CITIZENS OF KUPA KEEP! WE KNOW WHERE THE ELVES ARE HIDING THE STICK! I told you they were cheating! NOW WE SHALL MARCH ON THE SCHOOL AND MAKE THE HALLWAYS DRIP WITH ELVEN BLOOD!ALL: HUZZAH! Expect a lot of events, and even dialogue, to be pretty similar between sides. Oh and the Douchebag that joined the KKK? He is a Jew.  : Defenders of freedom! I thank you for your courage, and your audacities in joining our fight! Tonight, we are no longer the humans or the goths. Tonight, we unite as ONE!   : I feel like SUCH a homo sapien right now.  : (from upper window) THE HUMANS ARE HERE! (another elf blows a horn): Ooh, they blew their horn! Blow ours, Butters! : (blows horn): Guys, flank left! Goth kids, prepare to attack from behind! The boob staff weapon was for sale in the community center. It fits my play-style for the Jew class pretty perfectly. It hits hard and debuffs the hell out of the enemy.    Someone earlier in the thread said that the Jew class is the cleric archetype. I actually think they're closer to a berserker. When wearing class armor and afflicted by various debuffs, they take less damage and deal more damage. Their abilities hit extremely hard and they can inflict more debuffs than any other class. One of their cheapest abilities inflicts Pissed Off on everything it hits, which means enemies will focus attacks on them. That means the Jew player will have a constant source of AP coming in. I've also taken the liberty of giving Douchebag a couple patches that give him a thorns effect. Basically this trip through the school is gonna be super easy. And if we get into any trouble, we have Butters with us this time. So in the absolute worst case, he can heal us! Oh, and Cartman adds us as a Facebook friend after the cutscene.  : I'm sitting on the toilet and taking a huge, smelly dump because I'm a big dumb fatass!Stan and Kyle like this.  : LOL : Pick a better password for your account, fatass.: gently caress you guys. Seriously.: They've barricaded the entrance. The elves are up to their old Jew tricks again. Find another way in. Take out the barricade from behind.: (idle) Try the cafeteria. There's a door by the loading docks. Go!: (idle) Douchebag, what the hell are you doing?: (idle) Get outta here, rear end in a top hat!: (idle) GOD loving DAMMIT!: (if you try to leave) WHAT THE gently caress?! We're in the middle of a siege, Douchebag! : Goddammit. : Kupa Keep!: gently caress the elves.: The KKK shall rise again!Gonna fast forward a bit until we're in the school.  : New Kid, if you're in the building: You're fighting for a tyrant, but I know there's good in you. Stop fighting for your evil lord! Free yourself from his control!: Get to the lobby! Flank their defenses!Craig and Scott Malkinson like this. : Geez, it's a mess in here. Those elves went crazy.: (when you pick up CHEF'S OLD PO BOX KEY) Aw. I miss his chocolate salty balls.  : Don't go in there, man! We got in through the back. They just mowed us down. Like DOGS, man! All my friends are dead! Oh Jesus!: When I close my eyes I see my friends' screaming faces. AGH!: gently caress this poo poo!: I don't wanna play anymore!: No prisoners!: You're going down!: You are loving dead!: I killed your friends!: End of the line, fucker!: Prepare to die, New Kid!: You're not getting past me!: Give up! We fortified this poo poo!: That's hot lava, you're dying right now.: Drow barricades are invincible. AND invisible!: (shooting water at you) Boiling oil in your face!: (shooting water at you) Bullseye!: (shooting water at you) Beg for mercy!: (if you hit the water pipe) poo poo, we lost pressure on the hose! : (if you hit a fluorescent light down on an elf) (You did it!): (if you hit a fluorescent light down on an elf) Yeah, you fried that motherfucker!: (after you knock out the other two elves) I don't wanna die!: Aw, gently caress me.: Uh oh.: Dude, just take my lunch money.: (if you knock out the last elf) Yeah, nice!: (if you blow up the big barricade) Wow, you're the greatest natural spell cupper I've ever seen!: (after you blow up the big barricade) They've got artillery!The last elf in the room fights us, giving me a chance to show off some of the Jew's abilities.  First off we have Sling of David.  It bounces up to three times and inflicts Pissed Off on any enemy it hits. It also hits like a truck, making it a nice bread and butter move for the Jew class.  Out in the hallway next... : Commander Douchebag, we're still blocked out here. I'm authorizing the use of deadly force. Flank that barricade!: (if you try to blow up the barricade) (Magic won't work if the fan is running!): (if you try to blow up the barricade) Ah! No magic with the fan running! You'll kill us!: (if you set off the sprinkler) (Now magic will work!): (if you set off the sprinkler) Now magic will work!: These are the terms of your surrender! One! You will be the elves' personal slave for...: A month.: One month! Two! You agree that the elves are the masters of the Stick for all time! Three. You eh...: Hey, hand me the mic for a sec. Three. The so-called Grand Wizard has to jump up and down continuously for three straight days. If he stops early, he has to start over.: Hehehahyahaheh! : The goddamn elves still have us blocked. Punch through!: poo poo, the door to the lobby is blocked!: (as a rat approaches in an upper vent) (Look! A rat!): (as a rat approaches in an upper vent) Maybe he wants to be friends!: (after you beat the rats) (You got him!): (after you beat the rats) You got him!  : Stay back you guys! Something is seriously wrong with the hallway monitors! : Help... please...: That's Gary Nelson! : Don't touch him, he's ginger!: We came to school the morning after the earthquake to report for duty. We didn't know school had been cancelled. We heard a sound from down here, found this green goo, i-it was everywhere. It... changed the other hallway monitors. (coughs): Serves you right for being a patsy rear end hallway monitor in the first place.: (standing up, quaking) Something in the goo... it... it...  : [Speaking German]: AAGHGH! Somehow that green goo makes ginger hallway monitors even LAMER! Whirling Doom is probably my least favorite of the Jew's abilities.  The damage is honestly underwhelming, and all it does is strip away buffs. Given how hard the other abilities hit, you're almost always better served using one of those and just ending the battle through sheer overwhelming force instead.  Jew-Jitsu, on the other hand, is my favorite ability.  It has an awesome pun name, it has a satisfying sound when you pull off the perfect hit, and it stuns the target for several turns.  The Jew class's ultimate ability is called Plagues of Egypt. It's really, really good. To start off, it hits hard and debuffs the enemy. But later upgrades also cause it to apply buffs to your party simultaneously. You can use three of the plagues per use of the ability. The final upgrade lets you use four plagues. The link, by the way, is not a demonstration of the ability in the game. You should still click on it anyway because it's pretty loving awesome. The Prince of Egypt is a pretty great movie, y'all.   You can cause frogs to rain from the sky and weaken their attack.  Locusts can likewise weaken the enemy's attack.  Fire can rain from the sky, melting armor and setting your foes on fire.  Finally you can summon the essence of pestilence and plague to Gross Out your foes. : (Hey! What's wrong with these guys?): Dude, what happened to these guys?: RRRAARRGH! SCHNELL!: I-it's probably just a l-lost German exchange student.: Wow, look at all this green goo. What the hell is that stuff?: (Don't touch that green stuff!): That stuff looks like boogers! Finally the last ability to show off for the Jew class is something special indeed. Just look at the name and let it simmer in your mind. Circum-Scythe. That sensation you just felt? That was you involuntarily crossing your legs.  Believe it or not, but this doesn't leave the target stunned. : (after you beat three NAZI HALL MONITORS) Wow, those guys are like, European or something. : New Kid! You don't want to be on the wrong side of this when Wizard Fatass's army falls. Think about what you're doing! It probably seems like I'm just showing off all the dialogue without any commentary. There really isn't all that much to say about the KKK side of things that I didn't already say the first go-round. : We're breached! Battle stations!: (firing) Hey Douchebag! Let's see how you like some flaming dog poo poo!: (firing) Stay still!: (firing) Lock and load!: (firing) Target locked!: (firing) I'm zeroed in!: (firing) Fire in the hole!: (firing) I never miss twice!: Look out!: Suck it, Stan!: Dammit, Stan, you dirty elf!: Why, you poo poo-slinging rear end in a top hat, Stan!: (when you knock over a barricade) Timber!: Elves, hold the line, goddammit!: (when you teleport to upper level) You can't hide, Douchebag!: (quietly) Try not to say anything. They might hear you.: (when you slide down rope on other side) There he is!: (firing) I got plenty of dogshit, Douchebag!: (when you explode the second barrier) Son of a...: (when you defeat all the elves) This isn't over! : (entering from the right) Good work! Douchebag, man the catapult and let our guys through the front door. Everyone, fall in!: (idle) Douchebag, seriously, get your rear end on the catapult.: (after firing the catapult) Use your magic to open the front door!: (after you open the door) That's it! Hurry, open the door! Before they know what's happened! : Push forward! I must save my strength for the final battle!: (idle) (Let's GO, Douchebag, we have to get the Stick of Truth!): (idle) Let's go, Douchebag! We have to get the Stick of Truth! : Don't underestimate Kyle. He's killed me a bunch of times.: We're gonna win. I can feel it! : Those elf kids never knew what hit em!Video:   Okay, that sword swinging is pretty cool. You just know Stan practiced that a lot. The usual drill applies with the video above. Boss fight and all that. : This ends here, New Kid. : (starting fight) Let's see you handle BOTH of us. (whistles, SPARKY joins him) Get em!: (idle) You forced my hand, New Kid.: (idle) Didn't have to be this way!: (idle) It's not too late for you. Switch sides!: (idle) Fatass tricked you. We tried to warn you!Sparky doesn't have a lot of health and is mostly there to soak hits for Stan. In all the times I've played this game, I've never seen him do it, but Sparky can apparently heal Stan. Usually the poor dog doesn't survive past the first round of combat. : (if SPARKY heals him) I needed that!: (if you kill SPARKY) Oh, no. No, no, NO!   You would think that killing Sparky would be a bad idea. It pisses Stan off and drives him into a berserker rage. But he doesn't have a lot of health to begin with, and Douchebag the Jew is pretty adept at kicking rear end. So the fight ends inside of three rounds. : (when you beat STAN) So much for the legendary Stan Marshwalker. This, by the way, is the Holy Hammer of Smiting that we got from the nazi zombie hallway monitors. The fire attack and PP on attack are patches that I added after the fact. It adds 100 holy damage on perfect attack and debuffs the enemy defense. Not bad!  This is the weapon that Stan dropped. It's also pretty drat good.  Being able to hit every enemy in a column is really useful, making this probably the biggest gameplay reason you'd want to pick Cartman over Kyle.  : OH GOD! OH JESUS!: OH GOD!: (We've got to help Tweek!): We gotta help him, New Kid! Hang on, Tweek!: Last chance, New Kid! He's nothing without you. Walk away from this! : Seriously, Douchebag, you're breaking my balls here. : I'm writing an epic madrigal about your cowardly death in this battle.Kyle and 4 others like this.  : This is it! You have the honor of leading the final assault, Commander.: (idle) Come on, Douchebag! Let's get in there and get the Stick of Truth!: Let's take the Stick from their cold, dead hands.: Good to see you alive, Commander Douchebag!: WHERE DID EVERYBODY GO, MAN? IS EVERYBODY DEAD? This is the Fifth Grade classroom. : (Oh hey, Lemmiwinks!): Oh, hey, it's Lemmiwinks!Video:  : Back away from the desk, Jew King!: The Stick doesn't belong with a fat, RACIST LIAR! : All right, Kyle, you fuckin asked for it. Go ahead and kick his rear end, Douchebag.: New Kid, Cartman is USING YOU, can't you see it?! He's a manipulator!: You're just jealous cuz the new kid picked ME as a friend over you, Kyle!: You've got one last chance, New Kid. Turn around and fight Cartman instead. Do the right thing.: Don't let him Jew Wash your brain, New Kid.: Attack him! NOW!: MAKE HIM SHUT UP!Presumably you can actually attack Cartman here instead of Kyle. I've never actually tried to because that would be dumb. All the dialogue after the cutscene is the same as before, so I'm not gonna show that off.  This dagger of the faithful isn't very useful to me. It has one less patch slot than anything I had been using. I still use it for the upcoming battle both because I'm an idiot and because it makes absolutely no difference overall. Speaking of which... time to show off the final battle.  : (if you hit him) Fine! You're gonna be sorry, New Kid!: (starting fight) Don't you know who you're dealing with?: (starting fight) Get out of my way or I'll kick your rear end! : (ENTANGLING VINES) You're staying PLANTED!: (ENTANGLING VINES) You're not going anywhere!: (ENTANGLING VINES) You think you can TANGLE with me?!Entangling Vines is pretty easy to block, though if it hits you, you're forced to skip a turn.  : Kick the baby!  : Don't kick the goddamn baby. : Yayyyy! On his next turn after having Ike reflected back, he decided to end the battle.  : You're about to get blown! Why did Kyle have a leaf blower? Why did he think it was a great idea to try and use it on us? Did he want to knock off our idiotic hat? : (if he wins) Who says elves are pussies? 40,590 points of fart damage is pretty nice, I have to admit. : (if he loses) (sobbing)From this point on, things progress exactly the same as they did on the other side.      So, enough of that dream. Time to return to reality.   Isn't it If not, oh well, at least there will be next time. See you then! 
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Oct 23, 2015 03:23
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Aaaaaaand here comes one of the most infamous parts of the game.
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Oct 23, 2015 05:41
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Yeah, exactly how are you gonna handle that?
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Oct 23, 2015 05:46
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He should probably put that part on the LP test poster. Putting it right here seems like a bad idea.
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Oct 23, 2015 07:37
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Dr. Fetus posted:Yeah, exactly how are you gonna handle that? I've managed to somehow keep it fairly tame. That's not to say that you aren't gonna see some poo poo, but it's nowhere near as bad as it could be. There's no lovingly rendered gifs of that scene for instance. There's GIFs of other scenes, though.
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Oct 23, 2015 15:07
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Considering this is South Park, I have no idea what scene you're talking about. I feel like "that scene" could be almost any scene in the game. I also feel, who cares, it's a South Park thread, so do whatever and just post everything inline.
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Oct 23, 2015 15:12
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Blind Sally posted:Considering this is South Park, I have no idea what scene you're talking about. I feel like "that scene" could be almost any scene in the game. I also feel, who cares, it's a South Park thread, so do whatever and just post everything inline. If I'm right, it's another scene that was censored for the European/German release.
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Oct 23, 2015 15:54
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Does it involve Nazis?
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Oct 23, 2015 16:28
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Mraagvpeine posted:Does it involve Nazis? No, it does not involve Nazi, although it would probably be even worse if it did.
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Oct 23, 2015 19:05
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One thing about the Jew's dreidel ability; when fully upgraded the dreidel turns into the MCP Moses, which is pretty neat.
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Oct 23, 2015 19:51
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I always start my battles with the Circum-Scythe, though, because it not only inflicts Bleeding and halves the target's armor, but it also grosses out all the other enemies when it's maxed. Granted, I don't really use the Jew weapons and armor much, which would work great with the debuffs, but halving armor increases the damage that just about everything else does. The downside is that having the enemies grossed out isn't compatible with conditions like Sleep, so the usual strategy for, say, the Al Gore battle fails because the puking damage wakes up the enemy soldiers every turn. Then again, that stopped when I got the Plagues and could inflict gross-out on the entire enemy party easily, but it's still handy for reducing armor levels.
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Oct 23, 2015 20:01
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Carbon dioxide posted:If I'm right, it's another scene that was censored for the European/German release. Nope. The German version only censors the Nazi stuff, since that's illegal.
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Oct 23, 2015 22:22
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Finally caught up with the LP and now the game is only £6 on Steam. Torn between buying it and experiencing the rest of the game for myself, or buying that Undertale game people are so fond of. Argh. (How far is the LP through the game, by the way?)
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Oct 25, 2015 08:53
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VagueRant posted:Finally caught up with the LP and now the game is only £6 on Steam. Torn between buying it and experiencing the rest of the game for myself, or buying that Undertale game people are so fond of. Argh. I'd suggest Undertale. Not only it is IMHO a better game, but if you buy that and follow this LP, you will experience both. paradoxGentleman fucked around with this message at 09:52 on Oct 25, 2015 |
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Oct 25, 2015 09:38
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VagueRant posted:Finally caught up with the LP and now the game is only £6 on Steam. Torn between buying it and experiencing the rest of the game for myself, or buying that Undertale game people are so fond of. Argh. The lp is currently at the end of day 2 of 3. Alternatively, I'm posting update 19 out of 32 or 33 tomorrow.
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Oct 25, 2015 14:26
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VagueRant posted:Finally caught up with the LP and now the game is only £6 on Steam. Torn between buying it and experiencing the rest of the game for myself, or buying that Undertale game people are so fond of. Argh. 
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Oct 25, 2015 19:41
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VagueRant posted:Finally caught up with the LP and now the game is only £6 on Steam. Torn between buying it and experiencing the rest of the game for myself, or buying that Undertale game people are so fond of. Argh. If you have a social media account, what you need to do is post something that vaguely hints that you might possibly not consider Undertale to be the Game Of The Year All Years Every Year Best Game History Of Universe Stop Making Games Everyone Else Seriously Just Quit It And Go Back To Playing This One Game Why Are You Still Open Gamestop Go Home You're Finished Which Skeleton Do You Most Want To Have Sex With. If anyone gets the tiniest inkling that you think you have a better thing to do in your life than mashing your face into a computer screen with Undertale on it, including eating or sleeping, your inbox will be filled with dozens of free codes for the game and people saying "Just try it, you'll never want such pedestrian things as food again!" Then you can buy South Park.
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Oct 26, 2015 01:10
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Stick of Truth has more traditional RPG gameplay with Mario RPG mechanics while Undertale has bullet hell stuff. If you don't like the latter type of gameplay, you might be better off saving your money and watching a playthrough on Youtube. Or reading the LP of it on this subforum.
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Oct 26, 2015 01:23
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Dr. Fetus posted:Or reading the LP of it on this subforum. Just make sure to only read OP posts, though, since not everyone in that thread understands the concept of "no spoilers".
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Oct 26, 2015 09:58
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Carbon dioxide posted:If I'm right, it's another scene that was censored for the European/German release. If it's the scene where you get a cheevo for watching for a minute, then it's still in the Euro release. As is the battle. I haven't played in a while so I can't remember if there are any censored parts besides the obvious Nazi censoring.
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Oct 26, 2015 14:31
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Roro posted:If it's the scene where you get a cheevo for watching for a minute, then it's still in the Euro release. As is the battle. I haven't played in a while so I can't remember if there are any censored parts besides the obvious Nazi censoring. Only the Anal Probe minigames and another thing later on is censored in the EU/UK release, the upcoming scene is fully uncut, I should know, I saw it all on my UK copy. 
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Oct 26, 2015 16:12
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  CONSIDER THIS UPDATE REALLY loving NOT WORK SAFE Greetings everyone. Last time we ended on a bit of an unintentional cliffhanger. So let's recap, shall we? Video: Good recap. Anyway, let's see just what it is these strangers want.  : Time to go to work! Work all night! Search for underpants hey! We won't stop until we have underpants! Yum tum yummy tum tayyy! I'm sure a good many of you already know what's coming. I mentioned in the OP that this game won the "Best Moment or Sequence" award from Giant Bomb's 2014 Game of the Year coverage. This sequence here is just why. I would link to the text recap, but there are several spoilers for the coming day in there.  I'm just going to quote parts of the awards page here. Giant Bomb GOTY 2014 posted:In the end, the moment we chose is the one that first sprung to mind when talking about this game. It was the scene we were all texting each other about as we played through the game, remarking to one another about our disbelief at what we had just experienced, questioning whether this was even something you could get away with in an M-rated game. Intrigued yet? Just hang on.  : OH poo poo HE'S AWAKE!: What?!: This kid is AWAKE! What the gently caress do we do?!: Oh, gently caress! : I guess we gotta kill him!: All right, gently caress it, let's kill him.The end of day 2 really does a good job of demarcating just where the game stops being grounded in reality. Alien abductions and nazi zombie goo aren't really realistic, but compared to everything that follows, they're downright grounded.   By the way, this is the highest damage we're ever going to achieve in this game. The gnomes really shouldn't have tried to take on Douchebag. This also just shows how much extra damage you get from hitting a weakness. This here is adding another 66% on top of what it already dealt.  You have to admit, these gnomes are tenacious bastards. Not many people can so easily stand back up after taking a Pyre Ball from Douchebag. : poo poo, he's too big! We can't beat him!: Well if you can't beat em, SHRINK em! Go ahead, Warlock! : (starting fight) Any last words, pussy?: (starting fight) You hosed with the wrong gnome.: (starting fight) I'm gonna tear your loving balls off.: (idle) I'm on a schedule, here.: (idle) I could be collecting underpants right now.: (idle) Just cause I'm small doesn't mean you can ignore me!: (attacking/channeling) DIE!: (channeling) Little poo poo!: (channeling) Magic, bitch!: (channeling) You are SO hosed!: (channeling) loving cocksucker motherfucker!: (attacking/channeling) Suck on that!: (if hit while shielded) You hit like a bitch!: (being hit) Ow!: (being hit) gently caress!: (being hit) Christ!: (being hit) No way!: (being hit) Jesus gently caress!: (being hit) You pigfucker!: (dying) I wish I'd spent more time gathering underpants!These guys have really filthy mouths. They also have a bunch of attacks they can pull out. Presumably you weren't meant to nuke them with a fire-driven missile like happened again.    A frost attack. Excuse me while I yawn. : Holy poo poo, run! (they run into the hole in your wall) I'll have to show the Gnome set off later. As you can see from the above screenshot, Douchebag is wearing his battlemage armor. Anyway, let's chase these bastards.  This rat looks pretty nasty. Let's try another route. See those green and blue wires on the far end of the screenshot? You can climb up those.  Another piece of the Gnome set, as well as another item in the "bounces randomly between enemies" class of weapons.  Up here we can attack the cracked pipe.  The pipe leaks water near the rat, which is then electrocuted by bad wiring.  Which makes it run away in fear right into the waiting arms of a mousetrap. That pouch, by the way, is where we found the loot I posted up above. Video:  Now that the rat is gone, we can enter the ventilation box it was guarding. This is also the approximate point where poo poo flies permanently off the rails. Buckle up guys. If you can, you should watch the video linked above.    : I just sometimes feel like we should tell him the truth. : Why?! So he can relive it all in his head? It's better that he can't remember!: But, if he really has this 'gift' h-he's going to discover it again on his own anyway.: And then they'll try and use him for his gift and he'll become a weapon. They WON'T stop looking for him - we have to keep everything secret, even from him.: I'm so frazzled. Will you just... make love to me? : Of course I will, darling.: Ahh... For the remainder of this sequence, you can hear both Mom and Dad moaning and grunting in the background. Yes, the Stick of Truth just went there.  Over to the far left of the next screen are some minor electric hazards and a pouch with loot in it.  That's the last of the Gnome set. The pickaxe head makes your attacks ignore 100 armor. The upcoming boss has 2200 armor, so ignoring 4% of that is not remotely worthwhile.  Over to the right, up above the ventilation box, we can find a rat stuck in the walls. That sparking wire is going to cause a fire some day.  Like so. Luckily we can put it out with a fart.  Another rat can be impaled with the shard of a broken pipe. The last one we have to fight ourselves, but it goes down in a single round of attacks and is otherwise identical to other rats we've fought.   We find this over on the far right side of the screen. The pickaxe ignores armor on each attack. For the reasons I discussed above, it's not exactly useful. The wall socket is our way out.    : Oh gently caress yeah!: Yeah, gently caress ME! MORE!: Yeah... MMM!: OOOOHH... y-OHH, yeah, yeah, yeah, YEAH (etc) One of this game's many achievements wants you to stand and watch your parents have sex for a full minute. There's nothing worth doing on the nightstand, so just head over to the right.  : Oh gently caress yeah!: Yeah!: Oh, poo poo, the kid is still following us!: He's not gonna stop until he finds a way to become normal size again! That means he's coming after YOU, Warlock!  : What?! Ah, gently caress!More combat against gnomes, more gnome slaughter. They're awfully weak to fire and having missiles dropped on their heads.  The underpants helmet grosses out anyone who attacks you, and the patch gives you 1PP when you're attacked. The patch is potentially pretty useful!  See this gold staple? That's the hard point of no return for this section. Once you "use" it, you're locked into the boss fight. So ensure you have everything before you do so. Video:  This video has the boss fight. : I'm not changing you back! I don't care what you do to me! : gently caress ME! gently caress ME YOU loving COCKSUCKER! Come on, gently caress me I said! That all you got bitch?: Yeah! Call me a bitch!: I just did you dirty little bitch!: Yeah I'm a real dirty bitch! Wanna see me in the panties?  : You couldn't just let it go, could you?! You couldn't just let us take your underpants! No, you had to go and start asking QUESTIONS! Well now you shall see the true power of an underpants gnome! Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the final boss fight of day 2. We're fighting an underpants gnome on our parents' bed, in the middle of our parents having "torrid, rough, middle-aged person sex." : (starting fight) NOW you've done it, fucker. It's time for some REAL underpants magic.  : (SHRINK UNDERWEAR) Here comes some serious shrinkage!: (SHRINK UNDERWEAR) Those underpants look a little loose!This is the only attack he managed to get off. It inflicts ability down if you don't dodge it. According to the Stick of Truth wikia, he also has an attack where he gives you a wedgie. It also inflicts ability down, though I've never actually seen it happen. : (LEVITATE) Lift... and... separate!: (LEVITATE) Rise, underpants, RISE! There's also this attack. Hanging low.  : (HANGING LOW) Oh, gently caress me, BALLS!: (HANGING LOW) Oh, poo poo, low bridge!: (HANGING LOW) Holy poo poo, it's coming right for us! Press the button prompt to dodge your dad's testicles. If you fail to do so, they smack you in the head and you take damage. I also would like to point out that the youtube thumbnail for the boss fight, before I changed it, was a perfect still shot of Dad's balls swinging at the camera.  The boss fight isn't very hard. Like every other boss, we absolutely wreck his poo poo with bleed damage. The first time I played this, I wasn't nearly as good at the game and I had to dodge something like three "HANGING LOW" attacks before the warlock finally went down. My first time though the game I also didn't use any weapon or armor patches. I'd say I wasn't very smart, but that was less than a year ago.  : Alright alright! You win! Take this! Take it!  : You can grow small or big whenever you feel like it! All we wanted was to collect underpants to stop the Taco Bell from releasing its toxic green goo into our underground world! You see, the green goo is actually a- RAAAAAAUAUUAUGH!  See you guys next time when we start day 3.
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Oct 26, 2015 23:24
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So, that happened. The gnome got the better end of that... end.
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Oct 26, 2015 23:34
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Uh What the gently caress We aren't in a butthole right now are we Please tell me we aren't currently doing Lemmiwinks 2: Honey I Schlooped The Kids 
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Oct 26, 2015 23:44
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Don't worry, we're not going up the rear end of our parents.
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Oct 26, 2015 23:45
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Of everything that went on there, I'm most surprised that the Underpants Gnomes actually had a coherent reason to collect underpants.
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Oct 27, 2015 00:01
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Profit is also a coherent reason.
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Oct 27, 2015 00:03
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Douchebag was remarkably chill given the situation he was in.
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Oct 27, 2015 00:31
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At last, the true meaning of the ???? step is revealed. Also,  .
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Oct 27, 2015 00:36
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AJ_Impy posted:At last, the true meaning of the ???? step is revealed. Hot, torrid, middle-aged person sex?
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Oct 27, 2015 02:15
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| # ? May 20, 2024 02:22 |
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rotinaj posted:Hot, torrid, middle-aged person sex? Nope, 'All we wanted was to collect underpants to stop the Taco Bell from releasing its toxic green goo into our underground world!' Though quite how this leads to 'Profit!' is another matter.
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Oct 27, 2015 02:22
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