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Sockmuppet posted:When my kid was that age and discovered the joys of whacking people randomly in the face, I used to hold her hand and say "no hitting, cuddle instead!" - and I'd stroke my cheek with her hand, making a big show of how happy it made me, and made silly faces, and we'd go stroke daddys face, and he'd ham it up too. It seemed to help, it gave her an alternate way to get a funny reaction from us. This is primarily what we've been doing. Grabbing her hand, telling her to not hit but play "sweetly" instead and then showing her how to stroke something sweetly and praising her whenever she does touch something nicely.
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Oct 27, 2015 13:01
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BonoMan posted:This is primarily what we've been doing. Grabbing her hand, telling her to not hit but play "sweetly" instead and then showing her how to stroke something sweetly and praising her whenever she does touch something nicely. I went for "gently", which has resulted in my toddler saying, "No, hold my hand gently!" when he wants me to hold his hand loosely enough that he can wriggle it free 
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Oct 27, 2015 18:36
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We say "gentle touches", with positive reinforcement when she shows us her gentle touches. Our 16mo will now gently stroke us/the rabbit and then applaud herself.
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Oct 27, 2015 19:07
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I have an internet-only friend somewhere in rural Ohio who is herself a nurse and very progressive. She posted on Facebook about biting--her son is maybe 14ish months old--and the responses she got I seriously thought were jokes. She's fine with spanking, herself. The least horrifying were "rub vinegar on his mouth every time he bites", "force him to bite a lemon", "wash his mouth out with dish soap" right on up to at least three mothers saying "I popped my kid in the mouth, not hard enough to make 'em bleed, but he has to learn LOL". NO ONE thought this was a problem. These people were posting "I hit my kid in the mouth" with their real names associated with it and this was normal. I think spanking is a far cry from smacking your kid in the mouth but it's all the same spectrum, and tells the kid the same thing. I'm not a particularly good parent; I yell and I've slapped my son's hand a couple times when he was about to do something dangerous/break something but Jesus, did I feel like I was not nearly as bad as I thought. (Heh, I am, but "at least I don't hit my kid!") I didn't even comment because there's an entrenched attitude about things like this that you're never going to combat with education and that makes me sad.
sudont fucked around with this message at 19:41 on Oct 27, 2015 |
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Oct 27, 2015 19:38
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sudont posted:I have an internet-only friend somewhere in rural Ohio who is herself a nurse and very progressive. She posted on Facebook about biting--her son is maybe 14ish months old--and the responses she got I seriously thought were jokes. She's fine with spanking, herself. The least horrifying were "rub vinegar on his mouth every time he bites", "force him to bite a lemon", ... Hah! These two would just encourage my son to bite more. Since he's 3, whenever we cook with lemon/lime, he asks us to squeeze one right into his mouth. (my mom loves lemon and is so proud that her grandson does this)
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Oct 27, 2015 19:44
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rgocs posted:Hah! These two would just encourage my son to bite more. Since he's 3, whenever we cook with lemon/lime, he asks us to squeeze one right into his mouth. (my mom loves lemon and is so proud that her grandson does this) I was going to say something similar... Nora loves lemons. When we were at a restaurant the other night we just gave her the huge slice of lemon from our water and she noshed on it the whole night.
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Oct 27, 2015 20:01
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Oodles posted:Our latest development is our three year old climbing out of her cot when we put her in it once we've done stories and prayers and switching her light on. Soon as I close her door, I hear her jump out and run across, stand on the radiator and click. Happened four times last night, so I took the lightbulb out and explained to her I had the light bulb. You do, but be prepared for her to not be happy about the one you get if she's anything like mine. Anything less than having the light on wasn't enough. Having a lamp on top of a dresser helped but frequently wasn't enough. You might just have to wait until she's asleep, turn the light off, and click the lamp on.
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Oct 28, 2015 06:13
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Who are these 14 month old kids kicking and punching and biting? My son is 17 months and has never, ever done anything like that.
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Oct 28, 2015 11:29
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CelestialScribe posted:Who are these 14 month old kids kicking and punching and biting? My son is 17 months and has never, ever done anything like that. You are a POOPCUP: http://www.scarymommy.com/parents-one-perfect-child-preschool-age/
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Oct 28, 2015 12:06
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CelestialScribe posted:Who are these 14 month old kids kicking and punching and biting? My son is 17 months and has never, ever done anything like that. Congratulations. We must all just be doing it wrong.
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Oct 28, 2015 13:10
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New Weave Wendy posted:You are a POOPCUP: That is awfully presumptive of having multiple children. I hate when people are like that with us.
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Oct 28, 2015 14:05
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BonoMan posted:Congratulations. We must all just be doing it wrong. Obviously. If we'd just do x, y, and z our kids would never hit or even cry. We really are screwing it up huh?
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Oct 28, 2015 14:14
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I may be a POOPCUP but you're a DOODOOHEAD
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Oct 28, 2015 14:16
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My wife is definitely suffering from post partum depression, and I don't know what to do. Everything I try to do to help only seems to make it worse. She hasn't seen a doctor yet. Hell, she hasn't seen a doctor since the c-section treatment I did started, largely because her previous doctor was a miserable excuse for a human being. I'm concerned, but it's not like I can force her to go. The local doctors office won't see her until they have her medical records, and she claims the previous doctors office are being dicks about not handing them over. (And I believe that, this is part of why I switched away from the same office years ago) So she hasn't actually been to the doctor's for... 7 months, now? And the depression is getting bad and I don't know what to do. It's not like I can force her into a doctor's office, but I'm worried about her. Any advice?
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Oct 29, 2015 03:39
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Does she recognize that she needs help?
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Oct 29, 2015 03:41
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sheri posted:Does she recognize that she needs help? Yes. Sometimes. Between bouts of how she doesn't actually deserve it because she's a terrible mom. I don't see her doing anything about it other than stressing out about it even more though, and she definitely doesn't want me to take initiative here. GlyphGryph fucked around with this message at 03:58 on Oct 29, 2015 |
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Oct 29, 2015 03:55
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GlyphGryph posted:My wife is definitely suffering from post partum depression, and I don't know what to do. Everything I try to do to help only seems to make it worse. This website is an awesome starting place and has resources to find support groups and medical professionals who know what they're doing: http://www.postpartumprogress.com.
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Oct 29, 2015 04:29
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CelestialScribe posted:Who are these 14 month old kids kicking and punching and biting? My son is 17 months and has never, ever done anything like that. Let me guess: your son also slept through the night from day one, only eats organic food, and has consistently reached every developmental milestone early. Oh and his first word was "please", right?
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Oct 29, 2015 10:30
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skeetied posted:This website is an awesome starting place and has resources to find support groups and medical professionals who know what they're doing: http://www.postpartumprogress.com. Much thanks, most of the ones I've found were pretty garbage.
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Oct 29, 2015 12:28
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GlyphGryph, I had PP depression with my first that I should have absolutely gotten treatment/medication for, that I didn't. I didn't figure out how to start bootstrapping myself out of it until he was pushing a year old. (I DO NOT recommend that!!!!) I knew I was in a bad way, inside my own head, but I was desperately afraid of saying anything to my husband because I thought he would see me for the crazy, incompetent, mother I thought myself to be, and would take the baby and leave (which I rightly deserved--my headspace was bad.) I didn't want to kill myself, because that would hurt my mother the way my own son dying would hurt me--and I didn't want to hurt my mother like that. I never wanted to hurt my son, because he was so precious to me. But I did think my husband and baby deserved a better wife/mother than me, so I used to think about having a car accident. (Which somehow would hurt my mother less, since it would be an accident. Again, my head was in no way healthy during this time.) I drove on the rumble strips on the highway, when alone coming home from work, more times than I'd care to admit. Just thinking about veering into the median.  Love her, love her, and then love her some more. Tell her there's nothing wrong with her, as a person or mother, for feeling like this. And that she doesn't have to--there is help available. Medication isn't a weakness. Best of luck. Also, as an aside, her medical records are hers (her property), and she should go into the office and demand them. Immediately. If they're stored on sight (and they most likely are) they are legally obligated to go and get them for her right away. Go to the office with her. It's so much harder to dick around with someone when you're in person. Threaten to report them if they don't comply.
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Oct 29, 2015 19:18
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A couple of milk questions. Insurance gave us a Medela pump, and my wife has put one bag in the freezer. Is it OK to put the bag in the bottle warmer, or do I have to somehow get the milk into the bottle first? Second, once I warm up a bottle, how long is it safe for?
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Oct 30, 2015 14:04
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hooah posted:A couple of milk questions. Insurance gave us a Medela pump, and my wife has put one bag in the freezer. Is it OK to put the bag in the bottle warmer, or do I have to somehow get the milk into the bottle first? Second, once I warm up a bottle, how long is it safe for? You'll need to unfreeze the milk before warming it up. Stick the bag in a bowl of water and leave it under the hot water tap in the sink, that will thaw it in about 10 minutes. After thawing, it can live in the fridge for 6 hours, and once warmed up to drinking temperature it should be used within 1-2. Those numbers are based on memory and you can and should look them up, your pump almost certainly has the real numbers in its booklet. Generally if you know you're going to be using a bottle in the near future, thaw it in advance of needing, because being helpless while your kid cries is an awful experience. If you expect to use it within 24 hours of pumping it, just leave it in the fridge instead of freezing it.
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Oct 30, 2015 14:14
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Our warmer has times in the booklet for frozen, though.
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Oct 30, 2015 14:16
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hooah posted:Our warmer has times in the booklet for frozen, though. That's probably for bottles which you've frozen the milk into. If you can get the frozen milk from the bag into the bottle without contaminating it, do that and use the warmer.
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Oct 30, 2015 14:27
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Volmarias posted:You'll need to unfreeze the milk before warming it up. Stick the bag in a bowl of water and leave it under the hot water tap in the sink, that will thaw it in about 10 minutes. After thawing, it can live in the fridge for 6 hours, and once warmed up to drinking temperature it should be used within 1-2. I seem to remember milk being good at room temp for 4-6 hours, a day or two in the fridge but when they start drinking it then the one hour clock starts (because of bacteria they can possibly introduce it something). I don't know... After like a month we just did whatever.
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Oct 30, 2015 15:39
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I don't know about bottle warmers, but just running the frozen bags under hot water had them ready for drinking in a few minutes.
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Oct 30, 2015 16:00
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We always kept a bottle at room temperature (within the 4-6 hour limit, of course). If I pumped extra after that, then I'd freeze it for future. Worked out pretty well. I discovered afterward that frozen milk has a different taste than fresh. That was a fun few days after I stopped pumping!
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Oct 30, 2015 19:29
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CelestialScribe posted:Who are these 14 month old kids kicking and punching and biting? My son is 17 months and has never, ever done anything like that. Child development specialist here. Totally normal behavior in young toddlers. Has nothing to do with parenting. Little ones can't talk, get frustrated and get physical. It takes time for them to learn to express themselves appropriately. Also, sometimes they just like the sensory experience of biting or hitting. It's new and interesting. They also don't have a concept that others have feelings yet, so they don't realize they are hurting someone. I can almost guarantee you that at some point in the (likely near) future, your child will hit, punch, kick, or bite someone. It's what young toddlers do. Which is why we shouldn't freak out when they do it or judge parents of children who do it. We should just work on teaching them a more appropriate behavior. Also, your child is one data point. Just because your child does/does not do something doesn't mean it is typical for all children. It is not helpful for anyone to say "well MY child doesn't do that."
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Oct 31, 2015 02:49
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Is it time for car seat talk again? My little one is outgrowing her infant seat so I need a new seat for her. I have a diono radian for the 3 year old. Is another diono my only choice for 3 acrosss so mom can sit in the back of the prius with them? Or do I just give up on 3 across and get her a chicco nexfit because those recline angles look nice? I tried to install a nextfit at buybuybaby today and it looks like the belt straps are horribly hard to thread. Latch would probably be the same as any other seat though. Side question. Has anyone used those vests in place of a carseat? Now that my older one is 3 we're getting into the range where he could use those on trips instead of taking a car seat.
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Oct 31, 2015 19:33
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The combi coccoro can accomadate 3 across. http://www.combiusa.com/Coccoro-p/8220.htm I remember reading reviews of people using these alongside the dionis. We had plenty of room up front in our Honda Fit with it in the back rear-facing. The only caveat I would give is if your child has a long torso this seat is not the right one for you. Our little guy is 99th percentile for height and it is all in his torso, so he was close to outgrowing it for rear-facing at 9 months. At that age he wore an 18 mo onesie and 3-6 month pants. It was adorable/hysterical. Here's the age/size specs: "The coccoro accommodates children rear facing from 3 to 33 pounds and forward facing from 1 year and 20 pounds up to 40 pounds"
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Oct 31, 2015 21:35
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How big is your kiddo? The Combi Coccoro doesn't tend to last very long rear facing. The Nextfit is easier than basically any other car seat to install with LATCH so if you didn't try that, you missed its major selling point.  It has a pulley system that makes it trivial to install and tighten.
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Oct 31, 2015 21:42
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Hdip posted:
I have a vest! Love it for travel. It's great to take on plane trips (not to wear on the plane, FAA guidelines doesn't allow them) because then I don't have to worry about a car seat at the other end. I threw it in the trunk on a recent road trip to visit friends because I knew once we got there, we'd be going places in her car and she already had 2 carseats in the back with no room for a third but plenty of room for my kid to be in the middle in the vest. It's also great for keeping in my trunk in case of unexpected small passengers. I wouldn't want to use it as a primary, it's definitely a "for travel and emergencies" kind of thing for us but it really has been great. Safety-wise, testing shows it to be somewhere between a 5pt harness and a highback booster in an accident.
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Oct 31, 2015 23:10
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Well the boys have had their surgeries and everything went well. We even got home earlier than expected because the surgeon thought the thumbs and circulation looked so well. Some crappy phone pics from the hospital:   The boys really charmed the nurses working in the ward, the last day we were there they saw two nurses in the hall as we were going to the play room and they both ran towards each nurse with their arms out and got scooped up. And singing in their baby language the tune of "brother john". I was never that social as a kid that I know of.
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Nov 2, 2015 12:19
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kells posted:Let me guess: your son also slept through the night from day one, only eats organic food, and has consistently reached every developmental milestone early. Oh and his first word was "please", right? No, not really at all. My son is 17 months, hasn't slept through the night once, can only say one word, can't point, and eats dirt pretty much two days out of three. I'm asking out of curiosity, not judgment. Calm the gently caress down.
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Nov 4, 2015 06:57
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hooah posted:A couple of milk questions. Insurance gave us a Medela pump, and my wife has put one bag in the freezer. Is it OK to put the bag in the bottle warmer, or do I have to somehow get the milk into the bottle first? Second, once I warm up a bottle, how long is it safe for? Here's a list with temperatures listing safe storage times.
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Nov 4, 2015 07:58
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CelestialScribe posted:No, not really at all. My son is 17 months, hasn't slept through the night once, can only say one word, can't point, and eats dirt pretty much two days out of three. Yeah no you weren't. Sorry nobody was impressed with your snowflake's gentle nature though.
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Nov 4, 2015 12:02
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Thanks!
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Nov 4, 2015 13:29
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CelestialScribe posted:No, not really at all. My son is 17 months, hasn't slept through the night once, can only say one word, can't point, and eats dirt pretty much two days out of three. It's possible that he doesn't hit/bite/use magic missile, and hasn't so far, because he doesn't communicate well enough. My older son (now almost 4, yikes) has had a couple months of hitting or biting (no magic missile yet, but he loves pretending to be a Kaiju Pig from Angry Birds Fight, so I expect it any day now) at least three times, and all three times it's been after he's gotten better at communicating what he wants (or, for that matter, what he's seeing outside) and then realized there were still moments where I didn't understand what he was asking for, or, worse, understood and didn't immediately comply. Or, in other words, resorting to violence when words don't work only occurs to someone for whom words sometimes work.
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Nov 4, 2015 14:40
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My son shouts out his attacks like Goku before doing them. We'll be playing or sitting still and then he shouts "HIT!" and hits me. Or his personal favorite "PEINCH PEINCH PEINCH!" Immediately followed by sad eyes "I'm going to be nice to my friends"
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Nov 4, 2015 14:47
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My 4 year old freaked me out for a bit when he very calmly said "This is going to huuUUuuurt!" as he opened his mouth and started going for my leg. I jumped back and asked  . "I was just pretending dad, I'm not really going to bite you". Yeah, I'm not taking any chances.Note, he had his biting phase when he was ~2 and 3. Happened a couple of times, mainly when he was struggling with another kid for a toy, his words being ignored and both his hands busy wrestling for the toy. The mouth seemed to him like the best option. rgocs fucked around with this message at 21:29 on Nov 4, 2015 |
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Nov 4, 2015 21:27
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