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Squizzle posted:Batman and Jim Gordon have strong opinions about model train scales while drinking coffee together—an eight issue mega-event I think I have part of the script to that... Jim Gordon: What about scale? Batman: Scale? Jim Gordon: We start building OH scale, they build S. We start using O scale, they start using small stream driven ones you can ride outdoors... Batman: And? Jim Gordon: And, you're wearing a mask. Jumping off rooftops. Now, take this guy. Armed train robbery, double indemnity homicide, has a taste for the theatrical, like you. Leaves a calling car... [shows Batman a plastic evidence bag containing a tiny T scale traincar]
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# ? Jun 10, 2024 19:52 |
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A seven issue series. Cyber-competent heroes and villains all over town are being forced into hiding. The capes are on the case, but an angry mob of internet rebels are blocking their attempts at every turn. Because really it's all about ethics in hero journalism.
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Squirrel Girl Looses a fight.
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Captain America quits SHIELD and now travels from place to place by faking sick and then stealing the persons car.
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bobkatt013 posted:Captain America quits SHIELD and now travels from place to place by faking sick and then stealing the persons car.
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Risk investigates the high rate of workman's comp claims from his sidekicks, the Men-at-Arms.
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Peter Parker prevents Uncle Ben's murder. Having learned nothing about power and/or responsibility, he goes back to pro wrestling but he's cast as a heel because he's such a douchebag. Eventually after years of fans treating him like garbage, Peter decides to quit by winning a fight against John Cena that he's supposed to lose while breaking kayfabe to call everyone in the WWE an rear end in a top hat. He's interrupted before he can start his plan though when Norman Osborn, having become the Green Goblin during this time, flies through the stadium's roof while on the run from Iron Man, effectively taking the crowd hostage. Norman, being quite insane, throws several bombs liberally around the arena, knocking out the cameras. When a bomb is headed for Peter, Cena pushes him out of the way (even though he has spider-sense, he would've gotten out of the way anyway, geez). Parker leaps into action to stop Osborn and stops him easily as Osborn was completely unprepared. Post-fight, Peter finds that John Cena has been mortally wounded by the bomb. Feeling immense guilt for the life he couldn't save, Parker dedicates his life to preventing injustice and upholding the principles of hustle, loyalty, and respect as the Amazing Spider-Man. (yes I did write a full paragraph for a hustle loyalty respect joke yes i do feel ashamed)
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Batman, but racist. Wait, Supreme Power did that. Hmmm. Superman, but raised in the Tumblerite echo chamber. Luthor is the head of the Young Republicans/a GamerGator.
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The Venom symbiote attaches itself to Rogue. It immediately dies, but Rogue is transformed into a flesh-colored blob of goo, constantly attaching itself to people and immediately draining their lifeforces.
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Dr. Strange has to save the Earth by magically quantum leaping back in time into the body of Bill Buckner during game six of the 1986 World Series. You won't believe what happens next! In a bid to expand Marvel's MAX adult line-up success we are re-introduced Squirrel Girl, now middle-aged and doing furry cam porn just to pay the bills. Berk Berkly fucked around with this message at 07:54 on Nov 24, 2015 |
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A comic where Superman swears at a child. A comic where Batman gets drunk, expresses a mildly transphobic opinion, and then following a heated argument with Batgirl, eventually realizes that he was wrong and makes a concerted effort to debias himself. A comic where Aquaman is treated simply as any other hero, without the creatives feeling like they first have to "redeem" him or "deal with the elephant in the room." A comic where Hank Pym is treated simply as any other hero, without the creatives feeling like they first have to "redeem" him or "deal with the elephant in the room." A comic where every other hero in the universe is trapped under a large elephant that was put there by Aquaman and Hank Pym, and they have to redeem themselves by dealing with it. A Big Two comic where both the writer and penciller are women of color.
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Batman gets over it.
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Ponsonby Britt posted:A comic where Hank Pym is treated simply as any other hero, without the creatives feeling like they first have to "redeem" him or "deal with the elephant in the room." This was that one issue follow-up that Waid did to Age of Ultron. It owned, BTW.
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Gavok posted:The Venom symbiote attaches itself to Rogue. It immediately dies, but Rogue is transformed into a flesh-colored blob of goo, constantly attaching itself to people and immediately draining their lifeforces. That sounds like a horrific nightmare.
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The young heir to a multi-billion-dollar financial enterprise is traumatized by the deaths of his parents at the hands of a petty criminal in a mugging gone wrong, and spends the rest of his childhood under the care of his family's servants. As a young adult, still grappling with a host of issues caused by this incident, he asks for and receives a host of different therapies, coming out the other side as a philanthropist and vocal anti-poverty crusader, determined to use his nearly-inexhaustible wealth in the service of society to genuinely improve the circumstances that typically lead people into lives of crime. Of course, he has that first petty criminal brought to him in the dead of night by well-paid private security so he can savagely beat the man.
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Medieval Giraffe Spawn
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FutureFriend posted:Batman gets over it. Every Batman writer pitches and writes that story though, it's just ignored.
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A time traveling Batman who prevents everyone is history parents from getting murdered.
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Gavok posted:The Venom symbiote attaches itself to Rogue. It immediately dies, but Rogue is transformed into a flesh-colored blob of goo, constantly attaching itself to people and immediately draining their lifeforces. Every host speaks in an incredibly cliche southern accent prior to death. "HELP GET THIS THING OFF ME YA'LLLLLL" Ponsonby Britt posted:A comic where every other hero in the universe is trapped under a large elephant that was put there by Aquaman and Hank Pym, and they have to redeem themselves by dealing with it. ![]()
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Yvonmukluk posted:This was that one issue follow-up that Waid did to Age of Ultron. Didn't it make a big deal about how he was bipolar, though?
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A time-traveling Venom ends up in the early 80's and nearly gets a young Stephen King killed. King is then inspired to write a short story called "The Raft." The framing device of the story is a trial where Matt Murdock points out that Venom is owed royalties for Creepshow 2.
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Thus making Venom a fivedollaraire.
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Lurdiak posted:Thus making Venom a fivedollaraire. That's huge if it's Eddie Brock Venom.
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Could be nice for Spaceknight Venom, depending on how the dollar is trading against the quatloo.
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I always wanted to see a Marvel Zombies story where the survivor characters are constantly rescued, helped and guided by an unseen force. A force that occasionally speaks up to insult them and make it apparent that it's reluctant to help them out, but is helplessly compelled to. It ends up being the Void, existing to counter Zombie Sentry's behavior.
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Gavok posted:A time-traveling Venom ends up in the early 80's and nearly gets a young Stephen King killed. King is then inspired to write a short story called "The Raft." Time traveling Venom hits Stephen King while driving a truck.
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This might be a good chance to bring up my What If? where everyone dies except Spider-Man, the Beast, and Nightcrawler.
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I always sort of liked how in the pre-Secret Invasion build-up Hank Pym just quit being a super-hero to become a professor. I want to read a kind of The Pulse/Gotham Central thing about a Department of Superhuman Studies at Empire State University or wherever. Not like an Avengers Academy or New Mutants thing per se, but just like, Hank Pym dealing with an inattentive lab group that shrinks itself down or Ice Man getting stuck with an awful Accounting TA who ~~**secretly works for Hydra*~~ and things like that. Peter Parker desperately trying to talk an undergrad out of applying for an AIM internship? Sort of like the Eliot Kalan series that just ended, or Wolverine and the X-Men. They could even bring back Vivisector! Give Kurt Connors and Miles Warren something productive to do for a change!
How Wonderful! fucked around with this message at 09:39 on Nov 25, 2015 |
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bobkatt013 posted:Time traveling Venom hits Stephen King while driving a truck. ![]()
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What if J. Jonah Jameson was the director S.H.I.E.L.D? MJ breaks up with Peter, he spends the next three weeks eating ice cream by the gallon tub and watching Labyrinth on a loop.
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David D. Davidson posted:What if J. Jonah Jameson was the director S.H.I.E.L.D? No, see, the joke is stories that would never be done because they're silly, not stories that need to be made yesterday.
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Paul McCartney accepts a request to play a free concert in Latveria, and Doom finds the ex-Beatle has only done so to steal his time machine to go back to the late 60s. Doom makes chase and discover's Sir Paul's nefarious plan: To have the Beatles record the hits from Thriller in a preemptive revenge bid against Michael Jackson.
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Vandal Savage introduces his daughter, Scandal Savage, to her brother Randal.
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Squizzle posted:Vandal Savage introduces his daughter, Scandal Savage, to her brother Randal. Friend of mine had it in his headcanon that Damien Sandow is really an alias for Vandal Savage after deciding he wanted to become a wrestler.
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Captain Marvel visits Jessica Jones and not once is it mentioned that she is a mother. In fact the infant isn't seen at all. Professor X wakes up one day and decides to run the Xavier School correctly, getting in quality teachers who don't need to go out and stop super villains. Over the years the students get a quality education and go on to become lawyers, politicians, engineers, scientists, business people and some even become teachers returning to the school to teach. This helps non mutants be more accepting of mutants as they now work along side them and see them as nothing to be afraid of. Superman's popularity takes a hit when a toy store costume is the cause of many choking deaths thanks to an incorrectly made cape. Superman has to spend months doing PR even though he didn't make the drat thing.
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Squizzle posted:Vandal Savage introduces his daughter, Scandal Savage, to her brother Randal. Jonathan "Scarecrow" Crane is finally paid a visit by his estranged psychiatrist brothers, Frasier and Niles.
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Eddie Brock and Flash Thompson watch John Carpenter's The Thing, make out.
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Kitty Pryde doesn't fall in love with a thinly veiled author insert.
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A valiant and capable superheroine rises to power in a still-recovering Germany, overcomes the incompetent British military immediately, and then struggles with the more competent French and American armies before finally conquering Europe during WW2, ushering in an era of peace, order, and prosperity through moral superheroics. Die Uberfrau, by Garth Ennis.
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# ? Jun 10, 2024 19:52 |
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Sigma-X posted:A valiant and capable superheroine rises to power in a still-recovering Germany, overcomes the incompetent British military immediately, and then struggles with the more competent French and American armies before finally conquering Europe during WW2, ushering in an era of peace, order, and prosperity through moral superheroics. So what's the joke/reference that I'm missing here, I have to ask. Because the idea of a superhero coming to power instead of Hitler and WW2 still happening but being totally different in reason/execution sounds like an actual interesting pitch to me. I'm assuming there's something I'm entirely not getting, though.
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