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Microwave ovens are loving retarded. Here's the extent of what controls a microwave should have: O O You get a knob for power and a knob for time. Turning the time knob turns on the microwave and it turns off when it hits zero. Add a bunch of stupid potato and popcorn icons to each dial if you want to get crazy. Make the knobs out of magnesium and walnut if you want to sell a fancier model. That's literally all any microwave should ever have for controls.
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Nov 30, 2015 22:57
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revmoo posted:Microwave ovens are loving retarded. Here's the extent of what controls a microwave should have: But sometimes I want my microwave to run for 5 minutes at 30% and then seven minutes at 75% without getting up in between each set.
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Nov 30, 2015 23:00
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^ Use big boy kitchen appliances Oh also, gently caress clocks on every goddamn appliance. If I want to know what time it is I'll look at a loving clock. There's nothing nice about every appliance in your kitchen displaying the time constantly sucking away at your electricity and illuminating your kitchen like a Israeli discotheque. God help you if the power goes out or george bush wants to feel important and gently caress with daylight savings time. Have fun running around to 6 different devices trying to remember the procedure for setting their clock, lest you end up with some hosed up twighlight zone kitchen where every corner is in a different time. I want to officially call out this trend of sticking clocks in everything, it's gone too far. edit: can someone post this to tweeter I'm not sure how to do that
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Nov 30, 2015 23:04
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And appliances that don't let you use them unless you've set the clock, even if a clock is not needed for the required operation.
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Nov 30, 2015 23:12
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Drifter posted:But sometimes I want my microwave to run for 5 minutes at 30% and then seven minutes at 75% without getting up in between each set. 
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Nov 30, 2015 23:15
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How do you make a milkshake with a microwave?
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Nov 30, 2015 23:21
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Rutibex posted:Microwaves should just have an on/off switch. gently caress all that bullshit I had a microwave from like the 70's that was literally just a timer knob with zero being off and everything else being on. it completely sucked power-wise but that was nice.
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Nov 30, 2015 23:30
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Drifter posted:But sometimes I want my microwave to run for 5 minutes at 30% and then seven minutes at 75% without getting up in between each set. Seriously, aggressive laziness shouldn't dictate design for all. I'm not saying you should reheat/cook everything with the stove or oven (even though you should), but sometimes simplicity is better. As far as digital clocks go, is it really hard to make a good digital clock? The clocks on my microwave, my oven and my car all "lose" time, and I have to fix them every few weeks because it drives me nuts to see two different times with a few feet of each other or remember that "A Prairie Home Companion" actually starts at 2:13 and not 2:00.
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Nov 30, 2015 23:34
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criscodisco posted:I'm not saying you should reheat/cook everything with the stove or oven (even though you should), but sometimes simplicity is better. mm yes let me fire up my giant inefficient heat box for 30 minutes to reheat this slice of pizza instead of running it for 30 seconds in the microwave.
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Nov 30, 2015 23:41
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criscodisco posted:As far as digital clocks go, is it really hard to make a good digital clock? The clocks on my microwave, my oven and my car all "lose" time, and I have to fix them every few weeks because it drives me nuts to see two different times with a few feet of each other or remember that "A Prairie Home Companion" actually starts at 2:13 and not 2:00. As for this one yeah it actually is kinda hard to make a clock crystal with low drift that doesn't cost more than like, 1 cent per piece in bulk, which is probably as high as the manufacturer is willing to pay. It shouldn't be losing a minute every few weeks though, they're better than that. Does your house fluctuate in temperature wildly?
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Nov 30, 2015 23:44
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Komojo posted:On every cell phone I've owned, it warns me that there's a low battery by vibrating the phone. ...and lighting up the screen to tell you.
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Nov 30, 2015 23:44
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Parallel Paraplegic posted:mm yes let me fire up my giant inefficient heat box for 30 minutes to reheat this slice of pizza instead of running it for 30 seconds in the microwave. Sure, it isn't as efficient, but it does result in better food. Plus, if you use a skillet, you aren't heating a giant box and you get crispy crust.
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Nov 30, 2015 23:45
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88h88 posted:...and lighting up the screen to tell you. God I hate this. Plus my new LG not only does all that but also somehow turns up the screen brightness and then changes large portions of the display to bright red instead of black once it hits 15% battery. (Since it's an OLED displaying black uses less power than displaying colors)
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Nov 30, 2015 23:47
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Parallel Paraplegic posted:As for this one yeah it actually is kinda hard to make a clock crystal with low drift that doesn't cost more than like, 1 cent per piece in bulk, which is probably as high as the manufacturer is willing to pay. No, the temperature in here stays around 70 year-round. The car does, though, since Ohio is bonkers and it can be 65 all day and 20 all night this time of year. That one makes me mad, though, because if I'm going to drop $50k on a car the clock price point sure as hell better be more than 1 cent per.
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Nov 30, 2015 23:48
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Microwave chat: my microwave beeps insanely loudly and incessantly when it's done and does not stop beeping until you open the door. However, if you want to use the kitchen timer feature, which I used all the time with my old microwave, it eeks out the most pathetic, quiet, 200ms beep imaginable. Just once. Hope nothing important was relying on that timer!
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Nov 30, 2015 23:49
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Well the crystals are basically designed to operate "optimally" at a certain temperature and then lose time in a predictable way at other temperatures, generally in a way that makes it so you're inadvertently early to things instead of late to things. The bigger the difference between whatever the crystal is designed for and the current temperature, the bigger the effect. That doesn't really explain your household appliances though, it's possible those are getting their frequency reference from the electrical socket instead of a crystal which introduces all sorts of fun new ways for it to gently caress up and drift. Clock crystals are an interesting design really, it's shaped like a tiny tuning fork because someone realized that that shape has a parabolic (I think) error curve, so whether you're hotter or colder than the design temperature it will always "lose" time in the same direction.
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Nov 30, 2015 23:55
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criscodisco posted:Seriously, aggressive laziness shouldn't dictate design for all. I'm not saying you should reheat/cook everything with the stove or oven (even though you should), but sometimes simplicity is better. The worst digital clock is still at least 1 order of magnitude more accurate than the best mechanical clock. Like, it isn't even close. If that's not good enough get one of those clocks that uses satellites to update based on the NIST atomic clock, I guess. forbidden dialectics fucked around with this message at 00:24 on Dec 1, 2015 |
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Dec 1, 2015 00:22
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Nostrum posted:The worst digital clock is still at least 1 order of magnitude more accurate than three best mechanical clock. Like, it isn't even close. I guess I've just always been more lenient on analog clocks, especially since a 1 or 2 minute difference is barely noticeable. What was so wrong with battery covers that slid into place on grooves rather than the type that just clicks into place? Mostly on TV remotes, but I've never had one where there little tab didn't break off, forcing you to have a piece of tape keeping it in place.
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Dec 1, 2015 00:29
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criscodisco posted:Seriously, aggressive laziness shouldn't dictate design for all. I'm not saying you should reheat/cook everything with the stove or oven (even though you should), but sometimes simplicity is better. I have literally never seen this happen, someone is loving with you via your clocks.
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Dec 1, 2015 00:33
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Tenzarin posted:How do you make a milkshake with a microwave? ingredients: milk, ice cream, marasciano cherries first, remove the ice cream from deep freeze and attempt to peel open the lid. When it tears or you get tired of trying, put the whole goddamn thing in the microwave for 25 seconds on high. Remove the carton and open the lid or shredded flap slightly to let the excess ice cream soup pour out. Stir three scoops of icecream with two tablespoons of milk until blended smooth and garnish with a cherry.
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Dec 1, 2015 00:39
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Shadow posted:Too bad they changed the design of the MacBook Air's magnetic plug. Now if you put the laptop. On. Your. Lap. It pops it right out. They made it fatter for some reason and add this as another stupid design feature of Macs. i think the macbook air is just too thin for magsafe to work well and thats why it's not on the new macbook. It works great on my pro and doesn't fall out. I am not looking forward to the crappy stress relief jacket to fall off and fray in a few years because Apple uses some evil rubber poo poo. My bad design complaint has to do with apple  Seriously what the gently caress is this? How did they figure this was an efficient way to enter text into a form? The new trackpad on the remote is too finicky to enter text quickly, siri doesn't do dictation, and if you have to enter A then Z you have to swipe like 4 times across the trackpad. Shits not good Tim
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Dec 1, 2015 02:42
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I had a Creative Zen mp3 player that would display a QWERTY keyboard, but the only way to navigate was to use left and right arrows slowly row by row. Putting the letters in QWERTY format did absolutely nothing to help typing.
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Dec 1, 2015 03:11
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Locker Room Zubaz posted:i think the macbook air is just too thin for magsafe to work well and thats why it's not on the new macbook. It works great on my pro and doesn't fall out. I am not looking forward to the crappy stress relief jacket to fall off and fray in a few years because Apple uses some evil rubber poo poo. You missed the millennial thread
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Dec 1, 2015 03:41
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Nostrum posted:Microwave chat: my microwave beeps insanely loudly and incessantly when it's done and does not stop beeping until you open the door. However, if you want to use the kitchen timer feature, which I used all the time with my old microwave, it eeks out the most pathetic, quiet, 200ms beep imaginable. Just once. Hope nothing important was relying on that timer! More microwave chat: My parents, who are notoriously cheap when it comes to appliances, found an old RadarRange at the dump and brought it home some years ago. It had a knob for power, a knob for time which turned on the fan, and a separate switch that engaged the Microwave gun. The door had a locking lever like a commercial fridge with a positive lock and a thumb safety release to make sure you couldn't accidentally bump it open. It made horrible clattering noises and took forever to heat anything. They used it for about 5 years. I'm sure it gave people cancer for miles around.
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Dec 1, 2015 05:26
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mostlygray posted:More microwave chat: My parents, who are notoriously cheap when it comes to appliances, found an old RadarRange at the dump and brought it home some years ago. It had a knob for power, a knob for time which turned on the fan, and a separate switch that engaged the Microwave gun. The door had a locking lever like a commercial fridge with a positive lock and a thumb safety release to make sure you couldn't accidentally bump it open. i know what you mean, my folks are notoriously cheapass about their appliances and they wonder why these chinese and korean off-brands don't work properly. their microwave is pull-open and the dead-man's switch is somehow wired to the power, so it goes on every time you open or close it when the door is half open. for real just spend an extra $50 on the German appliance, jesus christ
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Dec 1, 2015 05:35
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We're definitely due for a microwave renaissance. I think there needs to be a standard for which side the "start" and "cancel/clear" buttons go on. Because I think Start should be on the right, and it usually is, but it's the reverse on the microwave at work. Two knobs are all a microwave needs. It's a more pleasing aesthetic and 9/10 times it's quicker to set up. Button creep has been horrible for microwaves. Oh and you can wire a cheap switch in series with the buzzer on your microwave to create a "stealth mode" feature. I've done this before and it's pretty easy. You pretty much have to take the whole case off to get at the front panel, but aside from the nuisance it's not difficult at all.
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Dec 1, 2015 06:52
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You can't see this woman's bottom half because she's sitting on the toilet having diarrhea that would make a mexican blush
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Dec 1, 2015 07:25
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Tenzarin posted:How do you make a milkshake with a microwave? Step 1: Melt ice cream in microwave Step 2: Drink
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Dec 1, 2015 10:08
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I had to look up that book, because seriously, how do you microwave a steak? Welp, looks like someone has already tried some of the recipies - sorry for the Cracked link
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Dec 1, 2015 10:54
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Ryoshi posted:I have literally never seen this happen, someone is loving with you via your clocks. Well if its a whole bunch of clocks in his house that are off it probably means the clocks are fine and its time itself thats amiss. It's about this time criscodisco will probably admit their house is actually in an unstable orbit around twin black holes or something.
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Dec 1, 2015 12:00
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even a scrub tier ultra cheap quartz watch circuit will only be off by a few seconds per week if they are reasonably thermally shielded, some stove/microwave clocks are timed using the periodicity of the wall AC and they are just as inaccurate as you'd imagine
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Dec 1, 2015 12:39
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revmoo posted:Microwave ovens are loving retarded. Here's the extent of what controls a microwave should have: My grandma has what must be one of the first microwaves sold to consumers it looks like it's from the 60's or earlier (not sure when microwaves started being sold). Anyway it's like what you describe: a knob for time and a knob for power. No spinning platter so good luck cooking something evenly. Anyway, Ill see if she wants to sell it to you.
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Dec 1, 2015 13:15
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disco volante posted:We're definitely due for a microwave renaissance. I think there needs to be a standard for which side the "start" and "cancel/clear" buttons go on. Because I think Start should be on the right, and it usually is, but it's the reverse on the microwave at work. To be fair the nice microwave at my last job had some kind of moisture sensor or something so those buttons for "popcorn" and stuff that normally do nothing but burn everything actually start a detector that could detect exactly when the popcorn was done so it came out perfect every time without you having to sit there and monitor it.
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Dec 1, 2015 16:01
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thathonkey posted:My grandma has what must be one of the first microwaves sold to consumers it looks like it's from the 60's or earlier (not sure when microwaves started being sold). Anyway it's like what you describe: a knob for time and a knob for power. No spinning platter so good luck cooking something evenly. Anyway, Ill see if she wants to sell it to you. My old apartment had one that only had one knob :coolbert: It's power was always 100%, which was never enough because it was like 400 watts or something absurdly low by modern standards like that. Conversely, I got a toaster from the 50's at a garage sale, and that thing gets super dangerously hot super fast and has hilariously bad electrical and thermal insulation. Like toast is done in 5-10 seconds in this thing, and when it pops you can see the flash of huge sparks coming from inside as its old mechanics break the full AC line power.
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Dec 1, 2015 16:05
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Drifter posted:But sometimes I want my microwave to run for 5 minutes at 30% and then seven minutes at 75% without getting up in between each set.  no you don't, no one ever uses anything but the maximum setting on a microwave, come on
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Dec 1, 2015 16:28
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90% power is good to keep oatmeal from overflowing. 30-40% is good for foods that tend to have hot spots.
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Dec 1, 2015 16:30
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Locker Room Zubaz posted:
Christ, this poo poo. It's not just Apple. I've never personally owned an XBox 360 or One, so I don't know if they still do this, but the Youtube app for the 360 when my roommate had one was like this. One giant row of letters and numbers you had to scroll through, and that was with either hitting the D-Pad for every letter to increment, or holding it to go through them "Fast", though it was only barely faster than just tapping the D-pad a lot since the delay from the first press to when it registered you wanted to scroll fast was too long, and then it scrolled to fast so you'd always overshoot.  I have a PS3, and originally it would pop up a qwerty keyboard. But then they did an update to the Youtube app (maybe Google/Youtube is the problem?) and it went to the long line of letters. And the PS4 app just decided that qwerty is dumb and it should be in alphabetical order:  Honestly, almost all on-screen keyboards are terrible and more companies should do what VIzio does with their new remotes:  Full qwerty on the back. I could do without the iHeartRadio button because seriously? Who uses that service anymore? But the rest of pretty good design. DrBouvenstein fucked around with this message at 16:39 on Dec 1, 2015 |
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Dec 1, 2015 16:36
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Parallel Paraplegic posted:To be fair the nice microwave at my last job had some kind of moisture sensor or something so those buttons for "popcorn" and stuff that normally do nothing but burn everything actually start a detector that could detect exactly when the popcorn was done so it came out perfect every time without you having to sit there and monitor it. My job has a full on popcorn machine.  DrBouvenstein posted:I could do without the iHeartRadio button because seriously? Who uses that service anymore? But the rest of pretty good design. iHeartRadio is paying Vizio for that button. Has nothing to do with demand.
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Dec 1, 2015 17:00
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DrBouvenstein posted:Christ, this poo poo. It's not just Apple. The PS3's Hulu app had letters arranged in a line like that AND it was so fuckin' poorly optimized that there'd be lag on the thing. Oh, you thought you put in a V because the cursor was over it when you hit the X button? Sorry, the seven core processor wasn't quite there yet and actually entered a T instead. gently caress Hulu in general, really. A lot about Hulu could go in this thread.
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Dec 1, 2015 17:03
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Parallel Paraplegic posted:To be fair the nice microwave at my last job had some kind of moisture sensor or something so those buttons for "popcorn" and stuff that normally do nothing but burn everything actually start a detector that could detect exactly when the popcorn was done so it came out perfect every time without you having to sit there and monitor it. I think those usually rely on the sound of kernels popping. The one at my parent's house that they've had since the late 80s does that and works perfectly.
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Dec 1, 2015 17:17
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