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EXAKT Science posted:is it really nachos if there's no cheese? makes u think... I think that counts as a cake, or is it an open face sandwich because there's meat... where's the chart?
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Dec 3, 2015 06:08
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| # ? May 24, 2024 05:06 |
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Dec 3, 2015 12:40
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would curiously nibble
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Dec 3, 2015 12:44
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The other day I made tacos with grilled flat iron steak and avocado. There's no picture but it was rough looking. Tasted great, but hard on the eyes.
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Dec 3, 2015 13:35
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It's burgin' time! 
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 all day
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Dec 3, 2015 13:37
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Hakkesshu posted:
It takes a day to freeze fresh peas, yes.
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Dec 3, 2015 13:47
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Hakkesshu posted:
I mean, this is a joke right?
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Dec 3, 2015 14:18
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Solice Kirsk posted:I mean, this is a joke right? Sliced deli meat or cheese, uncooked peas and rice
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Dec 3, 2015 14:42
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Do the people flooding #cookingforbae with deliberately bad food realize that bad food is only funny if it's made unironically? Dumping a bag of frozen peas on a plate isn't funny. loving bandwagoners. It's a joke, minus the humor.
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Dec 3, 2015 15:11
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Hakkesshu posted:all day The traditional preparation of the classic Jamaican frozen peas, dry uncooked rice, and raw empty spring roll wrappers dish is hard work don't judge
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Dec 3, 2015 15:53
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 Those are the eyes of a man who has finally realized what he's become.
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Dec 3, 2015 16:25
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ACES CURE PLANES posted:
A victim of lovely Photoshop?
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Dec 3, 2015 17:03
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Who cares? It's more fun this way? 
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Dec 3, 2015 17:05
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ACES CURE PLANES posted:
If he has to stuff that up his rear end in a top hat I'd like a link to the GOFUNDME page
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Dec 3, 2015 17:09
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Fieri gently caress the dogs
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Dec 3, 2015 17:12
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ACES CURE PLANES posted:Those are the eyes of a man who has finally realized what he's become. Dehumanize yourself and face to hot dog
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Dec 3, 2015 21:10
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Brawnfire posted:Fieri gently caress the dogs And then eat the eggs.
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Dec 3, 2015 22:22
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I heart bacon posted:And then eat the eggs. While loving the hot dogs.
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Dec 3, 2015 22:53
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 Why is it wet?!?
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Dec 3, 2015 23:12
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Picnic Princess posted:
Gotta pull that pasta straight from the water
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Dec 3, 2015 23:28
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That's how we'd always get it at school, wet and clammy. I think it was shipped to them in a big frozen chunk and they'd defrost it, so you get these lovely wormy noodles floating around in watery sauce that tastes like pennies. A bad time was had by all, except those fuckers who had money to buy tacos from the snack cart (gently caress you).
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Dec 3, 2015 23:31
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Magic Hate Ball posted:That's how we'd always get it at school, wet and clammy. I think it was shipped to them in a big frozen chunk and they'd defrost it, so you get these lovely wormy noodles floating around in watery sauce that tastes like pennies. A bad time was had by all, except those fuckers who had money to buy tacos from the snack cart (gently caress you). So every day the choice was watery coppery spaghetti or tacos for the rich? That sounds like some Roald Dahl poo poo
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Dec 4, 2015 02:35
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Who wants the worst army food of all time? Ukrainian Rations This is a somewhat odd ration for me to be eating at the moment, considering that it was sent to my from the capital of a country currently experiencing a civil war/invasion by Russia. It's actually two rations in one review, as Ukraine changed its ration style during the current conflict to one that (outwardly) resembles MRE-style bagged rations. The contents are the same, just different packaging, but I got different cans in each.  The packaging is one of the odder ones for rations, basically an oversized frozen dinner tray. It has rather flimsy foil covering a green tray with three deep divided sections. The sections are actually scored so they can be broken into three separate pieces for each meal, but the scoring was done very poorly and you'd need a knife or heavy-duty scissors to actually cut into it.  As you can see, it's almost the same size as an MRE.  The first thing that usually jumps out at you is "Holy gently caress, that's a lot of crackers." Each meal came with two bags of crackers, and one bag easily has twice as much total square inches of bread as a single MRE cracker pack. What you can't see is that one corner was somehow damaged during packaging or transport and torn open, which also tore open the bag of crackers. In fact, most of the cracker bags had torn open in the sealed ration for no apparent reason. At first I thought this would make them stale. I soon discovered that this was accurate, but not for the reasons I expected.    The crackers are похід type. This is pokhid, or Hike in English. I'm not sure of the exact manufacturer, like if the label in the top-left corner includes the full name with the letters in the circle or if it's an acronym or what. As I expected, the torn bags of crackers were stale. Surprisingly, however, the undamaged bag was also stale. None of the items appeared to be past their expiration date, so I'm not sure if I got unlucky with old crackers or if they're just packaging cheap crap. They had a strong bready taste, and I think they were just wheat crackers.  The damage to the container also tore the napkin in the breakfast menu.   I believe this was a moist towelette. Burger Club is a Ukrainian fast food chain active in Ukraine, Russia, and Kazakhstan.   The predominant beverage in Ukraine is tea, so several instant tea packets are included in the ration. These seem to be a pre-made mixture of tea and brown sugar in crystal form, which are simply mixed with hot water. It was surprisingly tasty, though obviously quite sweet out of the packet.   The spoons of these rations were the subject of mockery in a video review of this ration for how rapidly they snapped in half trying to dig into the food. While I never broke any spoons, I did notice that they were incredibly thin and bent very easily.    After mulling it over for a while, I finally dug out the breakfast can and cracked it open. Our first meal of the day is buckwheat kasha. Kasha is an Eastern European porridge made from buckwheat, barley, or oats. It can be quite tasty when prepared properly and with additional ingredients, and can be made a savory or sweet dish depending on what you cook it with. I believe this was meant to be a beef kasha, but it had no noticeable ingredients apart from the buckwheat and some fat. The only word I can use to describe the flavor is bland. It had virtually no taste other than buckwheat, which is kind of like edible cardboard when cooked like this. This was the first in a consistent series of missteps by the ration which only got worse as time went on.      The next can of stuff was more kasha with beef, I think barley this time. Whereas I simply microwaved my breakfast, I decided to do something a little more authentic. I happen to own a Soviet mess kit that has been cleaned and made food safe! The mess kit consists of two parts: a larger pot with a wire handle for hanging over a fire, and a lid with a folding handle that doubles as a serving container. I put the mess kit on my stove top and dumped my meat into some water; from what I read, the food was supposedly meant to be cooked and eaten as a stew rather than just eating it right out of a can. As soon as the heat started, the fat floated to the top of the water and formed a nasty scum. However, it boiled away and eventually the food started to look sorta like mystery meat!  It came out surprisingly edible....and bland. Just like the buckwheat kasha, it had virtually no flavor. Despite the visible presence of meat it tasted almost like nothing of the sort and was still so fatty as to coat my mouth in a layer of grease as I chewed and swallowed. It appears that absolutely zero spice or flavor elements were used to brighten up the dish, leaving it reliant on whatever soldiers could scrounge up if they wanted something that tasted like more than sadness. I finished it, but felt bad about it.    The second dish was horrifying. I think it was meant to be some kind of canned sausage or meat patty? I have no clue. I poured the incredible amount of grease out of the can before cooking it, and there was still enough fat to melt into a puddle during reheating. It tasted meaty all right, but also incredibly salty and with that same grease film on the roof of my mouth as the kasha. It was close to vomit-worthy and I chucked it after two bites.   As the kasha cooked, I made myself the crystallized instant beverage in the tray. While it smelled strongly fruity, it came out with virtually no flavor aside from a faint sweetness. I could drink it just fine, but it was boring.   A little packet of sugar was included. Felt somewhat redundant, as the two drinks available already had sugar mixed in.   The final challenge of Ration 1 was two dishes. The first was a pate. Speaking as someone who gladly ate liverwurst as a child, this was revolting. I feel like it was a take on the old potted meat, where you packed meat in a ton of fat to preserve it. It was encased in goopy fat that couldn't be removed even with the aid of heat. Not only did you get the typical bland "I taste nothing but faint salt" Ukrainian meat, but It was one of the worst things in all of Ukraine, and I'm including artillery in that list.   The sprats that came with it were almost as bad. I'm already not a fan of these fake sardines, but the thick tomato sauce was doing these fish no favors as they stared at me. Like the pate, I couldn't finish it.   The horrors of war.    The new Ukrainian ration is based on the MRE only in outside looks. Inside, the contents are little different from the old ration and are simply placed into three bags. Whereas the MRE has such thick plastic that you need to use a blade or peel along a seal to open it, the Ukrainian ration is so flimsy that I could puncture it with my fingers.    The first of two new cans in this ration was another barley kasha and beef dish, merely a different brand. Like before, bland and scummy on the inside of my mouth. At least it's filling.    A little instant coffee was included. Like the tea, I enjoyed it. It was easily improved by the mongo pack of sugar included.   The moist towelette was a commercial brand this time instead of a restaurant advertisement.  A little pouch of jelly was included. I don't remember exactly what flavor it was, but it was definitely a little gritty.  Interestingly, the crackers changed. Same brand and taste, but now a smaller number of larger crackers.  The last of the new items. What could be inside?     This putrid mess tasted exactly like it looks. This is the first time I could describe the dish as gelatinous. I'm wondering if feeding this to your soldiers counts as a war crime. And there you have it. Two rations currently seeing action at this very moment! The old one is sometimes sold as the "officer's ration", but as far as I know it's just an older version that has since been supplemented or replaced by the faux MRE. It's easily the worst of all the rations I've tried or seen other people try, even worse than the Russian ration (which itself is only slightly improved). They clearly went for the cheapest food possible and only made a token effort at morale-boosting food.
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Dec 4, 2015 02:42
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^^ You, sir, must have an iron stomach to make it as far as you did. Picnic Princess posted:
Because cheap sauce is runny? Kakairo has a new favorite as of 02:53 on Dec 4, 2015 |
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Dec 4, 2015 02:43
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Mexican Deathgasm posted:You people are crazy, that looks amazing and the combination of flavors sounds fantastic. I would eat the gently caress out of that. Agreed. *eats three nachos and is satisfied*
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Dec 4, 2015 02:45
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Aesop Poprock posted:So every day the choice was watery coppery spaghetti or tacos for the rich? That sounds like some Roald Dahl poo poo Yeah, basically. Our school was right on the border between the wealthy part of town and the dumpy part of town, which I lived in, so half the students relied on free or subsidized lunches and the other half would either go off-campus in their fancyass cars (there was nothing within walking distance, just suburb) or buy from the pricey on-campus vendors. Since the school lunches were brought in on a big truck from a central distributor with a primary interest in cutting corners, all the poor kids ate unfulfilling, lovely meals like this:  If you were really unlucky, you had to eat school breakfast as well, which was usually one of those Duchess honey buns and a tiny carton of half-frozen no-brand orange juice that tasted like paper pulp. Fun times!
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Dec 4, 2015 03:05
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chitoryu12 posted:щось жахливе wow godspeed
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Dec 4, 2015 08:21
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chitoryu12 posted:Who wants the worst army food of all time? Wow. Imagine bland pots of unseasoned boiled meat stomping into a human face. Forever. Looks like that "jelly" is actually honey.
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Dec 4, 2015 11:29
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Nice review. A couple of notes. Instant teas is very uncommon in Eastern Europe, so I'm surprised they didn't just pack a tea bag. The fruity drink is supposed to be something like Kool-Aid. I don't know if you used cold water, but it's definitely supposed to be somewhat refreshing. You might have also poured too much water, as it only requires 200 ml. The pâté-looking thing is what I would call bologna spread. It says sausage mince on the tin. Never seen this stuff before, surprisingly, but I just know it tastes. As for sprats they go better with tough rye bread like Borodinsky, but I would never try to down them on their own. The last item is called Tourist's Breakfast. Again, you are supposed to add it to potatoes, spaghetti, or kasha. Eating it as it is is pretty sad. I never tried those particular brands, but judging just by how tins look, they are not the cheapest ones, but then canned foods are not exactly upmarket anyway, so it's a moot point. As for the spoons, I think soldiers are issued personal metal spoons and mugs. Maybe the plastic ones are in case you need to share your ration with someone.
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Dec 4, 2015 11:50
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Paladinus posted:The last item is called Tourist's Breakfast. Again, you are supposed to add it to potatoes, spaghetti, or kasha. Eating it as it is is pretty sad. Wait, that's real? I figured it was just STALKER being weird.
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Dec 4, 2015 12:01
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Wanamingo posted:Wait, that's real? I figured it was just STALKER being weird. STALKER was based on real events. 
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Dec 4, 2015 12:04
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Paladinus posted:STALKER was based on real events. Woah Just... woah Content: 
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Dec 4, 2015 12:13
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Mmmm, unflavoured 1% milk. How many people even bother to drink that?
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Dec 4, 2015 13:32
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This guy.
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Dec 4, 2015 13:36
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Tiggum posted:Mmmm, unflavoured 1% milk. How many people even bother to drink that? 1% is fine, I grew up with it. Perfectly serviceable.  And pardon me if I lol @ "unflavored" being a thing to observe about milk. (E: and I'm speaking as someone who goes like "vanilla ice cream? cheese pizza? Here's a quarter son, buy yourself an upgrade to the high life") Nonfat, now, that stuff is war crime material. Data Graham has a new favorite as of 14:09 on Dec 4, 2015 |
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Dec 4, 2015 14:06
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Paladinus posted:Nice review. A couple of notes. Sweet drinks and candy are common in military rations, they want the troops to ingest a lot of sugar to keep energy levels up. In the Dutch army, snickers bars are part of the rations.
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Dec 4, 2015 14:23
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Dec 4, 2015 15:03
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New episode of IZombie looking good.
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Dec 4, 2015 15:13
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Paladinus posted:The fruity drink is supposed to be something like Kool-Aid. I don't know if you used cold water, but it's definitely supposed to be somewhat refreshing. You might have also poured too much water, as it only requires 200 ml. Yeah, I used cold. Is it really 200 ml? That seems like an incredibly tiny amount of water, not enough to even dissolve all of the powder. quote:The last item is called Tourist's Breakfast. Again, you are supposed to add it to potatoes, spaghetti, or kasha. Eating it as it is is pretty sad. With these rations, I normally try to eat only the contents of the ration (plus water). I go under the assumption that you're going to be eating this by itself in the field anyway, not necessarily having the chance to mix your food together with stuff you purchased or stole to make a meal (though I did some reading on Serbian rations and apparently it was common for everyone to pool their stuff together to make a group meal). twoday posted:Looks like that "jelly" is actually honey. It definitely didn't taste like it. It was fruity and gritty.
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Dec 4, 2015 15:35
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| # ? May 24, 2024 05:06 |
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Jim Bakker of sex scandal and federal prison fame, is selling food to fuel you through the Apocalypse. If you fear that you will not be taken up to heaven in Jesus' arms during the Rapture, you can at least eat a kind of mush that resembled food at one time: 
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Dec 4, 2015 15:41
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