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Bizarro Kanyon
Jan 3, 2007

Something Awful, so easy even a spaceman can do it!


How did Cruz's and Rubio's families immigrate to the US? Did either one of them get the "you touched the US so you can now stay forever" treatment? That is a lovely vetting process and either one of them could be secret sleeper communist cells.

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Sancho
Jul 18, 2003

Both came through legal channels.

Montasque
Jul 18, 2003

Living in a hateful world sending me straight to Heaven
Trump supporters got a really weird thing with Aladdin...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0S22BFaos6A

Never in my life did I think I'd hear a racist/pro-Trump take on NEVER HAD A FRIEND LIKE ME. Welp, here we are.

Shageletic
Jul 25, 2007

Josh Lyman posted:

His cuticles are in great shape

Donald Trump posted:

My fingers are long and beautiful, as, it has been well been documented, are various other parts of my body.

The most influential politician in America everybody!

AreWeDrunkYet
Jul 8, 2006

Sancho posted:

Both came through legal channels.

Cuban migrants get (or is it used to get?) a special exemption from any immigration requirements. In effect, if they touch US soil they have legal status here - there is no such thing as Cuban who immigrated to the US illegally.

Darkman Fanpage
Jul 4, 2012

Montasque posted:

Trump supporters got a really weird thing with Aladdin...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0S22BFaos6A

Never in my life did I think I'd hear a racist/pro-Trump take on NEVER HAD A FRIEND LIKE ME. Welp, here we are.

In an infinite universe all things are possible friend.

richardfun
Aug 10, 2008

Twenty years? It's no wonder I'm so hungry. Do you have anything to eat?

Shageletic posted:

The most influential politician in America everybody!

No loving way that that's a real quote.

Is it?

Louisgod
Sep 25, 2003

Always Watching
Bread Liar

AreWeDrunkYet posted:

Cuban migrants get (or is it used to get?) a special exemption from any immigration requirements. In effect, if they touch US soil they have legal status here - there is no such thing as Cuban who immigrated to the US illegally.

Is this why they're so good at baseball, they just pretend second base is US soil and they try to run there before homeland security tags them out?

blue squares
Sep 28, 2007

richardfun posted:

No loving way that that's a real quote.

Is it?

It is.

Montasque
Jul 18, 2003

Living in a hateful world sending me straight to Heaven


Freezing rain or a coke binge hangover?... I report you decide.

reignofevil
Nov 7, 2008

Mods please ban for inline NWS tia

Goatse James Bond
Mar 28, 2010

If you see me posting please remind me that I have Charlie Work in the reports forum to do instead

My Imaginary GF posted:

As tired as America is about hearing of those damned emails, how tired is America of hearing about Bill's schlongings?

I'm having trouble figuring out what narrative you're practicing lately. Or is it "let's see how many mutually contradictory stories I can bullshit on convincingly"?

Montasque
Jul 18, 2003

Living in a hateful world sending me straight to Heaven
Trump plots big TV ad blitz that could change campaign landscape

quote:

When Donald Trump and his team were planning his presidential campaign, they drew up a budget of $25 million for television advertising in the third quarter of this year.

They wound up spending zero for the rest of 2015.

That is about to change. Sources in the Trump camp say they will soon launch a major ad blitz that could cost at least $2 million a week, and possibly several times that.

The initial wave of ads will focus on Trump’s vision and his stance on key issues—no bio spots necessary for the celebrity candidate—but that could change if any GOP rivals target him with negative commercials. “If you attack Trump, he will attack you 10 times as hard,” an adviser says. “We will not allow any attack to go unanswered.”

The Trump camp is working with a Florida-based advertising firm, as widely reported, but also with several other media companies, some of which are well-known in the political community, the sources say.

Their advantage, in Iowa, New Hampshire and beyond, is that the bombastic billionaire can just write a check for the TV campaign. Some pundits have expressed skepticism that Trump really wants to dig deeply into his personal fortune, but these sources insist he is ready to do just that—perhaps as much as $100 million for advertising overall. “Our Super PAC,” says the adviser, “is Donald Trump’s bank account.”

The Kingfish
Oct 21, 2015



They all just look like a dude's sideways mouth. What a bunch of tryhard bullshit.

Nolan Arenado
May 8, 2009

Montasque posted:



Freezing rain or a coke binge hangover?... I report you decide.

I think Marco should ice skate around town and visit houses door to door.

Alec Bald Snatch
Sep 12, 2012

by exmarx

The Kingfish posted:

They all just look like a dude's sideways mouth. What a bunch of tryhard bullshit.

ted cruz was the awful vagina all along

SuperDucky
May 13, 2007

by exmarx

Blattdorf posted:

Fill a glass with vodka.

Take a sip whenever Sanders uses the word "issue" or "issues".

Refill when Sanders says "Wall Street" or "greed".

Now see how long it will take you to empty that glass.

I'm pretty sure that's manslaughter in most states.

DynamicSloth
Jul 30, 2006

"Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth."

I'd believe it when I see it, $2 million a week is about what Jeb is paying in New Hampshire alone and Trump won't get as good a rate if he jumps in late.

Ramrod Hotshot
May 30, 2003

Montasque posted:



Freezing rain or a coke binge hangover?... I report you decide.

There's something going on with him. And it's going to be great when it comes out.

H5N1
Mar 8, 2005

heil satan
I can't believe how excited I am about the Jeb campaign!

H5N1 fucked around with this message at 23:26 on Oct 18, 2016

Montasque
Jul 18, 2003

Living in a hateful world sending me straight to Heaven

DynamicSloth posted:

I'd believe it when I see it, $2 million a week is about what Jeb is paying in New Hampshire alone and Trump won't get as good a rate if he jumps in late.

Won't he get a better rate regardless since he's paying out of pocket instead of from a Super Pac?

I thought that's why Rubio was killing Jeb! in airtime vs cost.

Mitt Romney
Nov 9, 2005
dumb and bad

Montasque posted:

Won't he get a better rate regardless since he's paying out of pocket instead of from a Super Pac?

I thought that's why Rubio was killing Jeb! in airtime vs cost.

Yup, Trump will get a much better rate since the campaign would be buying it and not a PAC.

Oiled and Ready
Oct 11, 2004

He wished it could be as respectable and orthodox as spying. But somehow in his hands the traditional tools and attitudes were always employed toward mean ends: cloak for a laundry sack, dagger to peel potatoes, dossiers to fill up dead Sunday afternoons ...

Montasque posted:

Trump supporters got a really weird thing with Aladdin...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0S22BFaos6A

Never in my life did I think I'd hear a racist/pro-Trump take on NEVER HAD A FRIEND LIKE ME. Welp, here we are.

I knew it had to be 4chan the whole time but I'm glad they gave us "remove kebab" to confirm it.you think there wouldn't be any overlap between people who enjoy and can imitate Disney songs this well and hardcore Trump supporters but here we are. Guessing /lgbt/?

Nolan Arenado
May 8, 2009

Ramrod Hotshot posted:

There's something going on with him. And it's going to be great when it comes out.

To be fair, the weather in Iowa is poo poo. There are a bunch of people trying to fly to California today so they can go to the Rose Bowl and I'm hearing a lot of horror stories.

I agree with your overall point though, there's just something off about the way Rubio is acting.

baw
Nov 5, 2008

RESIDENT: LAISSEZ FAIR-SNEZHNEVSKY INSTITUTE FOR FORENSIC PSYCHIATRY
there will come a point where it will be trump vs cruz and cruz won't be able to backpedal and avoid trump's wrath by kissing his rear end

hopefully before iowa

The Nastier Nate
May 22, 2005

All aboard the corona bus!

HONK! HONK!


Yams Fan

DynamicSloth posted:

I'd believe it when I see it, $2 million a week is about what Jeb is paying in New Hampshire alone and Trump won't get as good a rate if he jumps in late.

June - Trump will never declare running for president.
July - Trump will never release his financial disclosure.
August - Trump will never qualify for the debates.
And all along I've been hearing "Trump won't spend his own money"

Say what you will about Trump, but he is very serious about trying to become the next president of the United States. Even on the lowest end estimate of his wealth, $25 million is a drop in the bucket and if he makes it to the general I could see him spending easily half a billion dollars on this election.
The real lesson here, as witnessed by JEB! is that tv ads are garbage for trying to win support, but who knows what he has planned for Trump TV ads. Maybe we'll get a Trump and Tom Brady ad in New Hampshire.

ate shit on live tv
Feb 15, 2004

by Azathoth
"Trumps balls are perfect"
-Tom Brady

Montasque
Jul 18, 2003

Living in a hateful world sending me straight to Heaven

Oiled and Ready posted:

I knew it had to be 4chan the whole time but I'm glad they gave us "remove kebab" to confirm it.you think there wouldn't be any overlap between people who enjoy and can imitate Disney songs this well and hardcore Trump supporters but here we are. Guessing /lgbt/?

No idea where this is from other than 'the chans.' it was posted on a pro-Trump troll twitter account that was harassing Rick Wilson.

DynamicSloth
Jul 30, 2006

"Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth."

The Nastier Nate posted:

June - Trump will never declare running for president.
July - Trump will never release his financial disclosure.
August - Trump will never qualify for the debates.
And all along I've been hearing "Trump won't spend his own money"

Say what you will about Trump, but he is very serious about trying to become the next president of the United States. Even on the lowest end estimate of his wealth, $25 million is a drop in the bucket and if he makes it to the general I could see him spending easily half a billion dollars on this election.
The real lesson here, as witnessed by JEB! is that tv ads are garbage for trying to win support, but who knows what he has planned for Trump TV ads. Maybe we'll get a Trump and Tom Brady ad in New Hampshire.

Except

November 2 - Donald Trump: I'm starting TV ads within the next two days

quote:

Washington (CNN)Donald Trump said Tuesday that he would begin airing television advertisements "over the next two days" and pledged to counterpunch his rivals by several multiples if they attack him on the air first.

"Dollar for dollar, we're going to go after them. We have more money than anybody else by a factor of about a thousand," Trump told Fox News' Sean Hannity on Tuesday night. "Actually, we're going to start some ads, I think, over the next two days. Certainly in Iowa we're going to start ads and in New Hampshire, and I think in South Carolina, too."

Trump's ads would be a major escalation in his campaign for the White House, which has thrived on earned media attention and hasn't needed to pay for exposure on TV. Trump said he had planned to spend $25 million on television ads, but no longer felt the need to given his high poll numbers -- a thriftiness that made him "feel guilty."

But should Republican candidates attack him first, he will not hesitate to turn up the volume on television.

"If they hit me, I will hit them at least as hard, and maybe double and triple as hard," he said. "I think the negative ads are going to hurt the Republicans much more so than its going to hurt me."

He hasn't even changed the 25 million number since then. For all we know this Florida advertising firm (who if you read between the lines isn't a regular player in political advertising) is just re-spinning Trump's number from 2 months ago.

Montasque
Jul 18, 2003

Living in a hateful world sending me straight to Heaven
Time to get EXCITED! JEB BUSH LIIIIIVE!

http://www.politico.com/livestream1

Brannock
Feb 9, 2006

by exmarx
Fallen Rib

Montasque posted:

Time to get EXCITED! JEB BUSH LIIIIIVE!

http://www.politico.com/livestream1

I opened this

I'm already bored

I'm closing this

baw
Nov 5, 2008

RESIDENT: LAISSEZ FAIR-SNEZHNEVSKY INSTITUTE FOR FORENSIC PSYCHIATRY
ok, i am going to watch this. here is what i heard when it started

i was in west...west puh, western pennsylvania

Montasque
Jul 18, 2003

Living in a hateful world sending me straight to Heaven
"I am with the RICE brothers, just as America was with the WRIGHT brothers."
*The sound of pampered soft hands smacking together unenthusiastically from the audience.

E:

"They called me VETO CORLEONE"

UGHHHHHHH

baw
Nov 5, 2008

RESIDENT: LAISSEZ FAIR-SNEZHNEVSKY INSTITUTE FOR FORENSIC PSYCHIATRY
this is fun to watch

in a different way from a trump rally of course

oh veto corleone line again

logikv9
Mar 5, 2009


Ham Wrangler
fire whomever told him that veto corleone was a good line to use

baw
Nov 5, 2008

RESIDENT: LAISSEZ FAIR-SNEZHNEVSKY INSTITUTE FOR FORENSIC PSYCHIATRY
please someone ask about trump

baw
Nov 5, 2008

RESIDENT: LAISSEZ FAIR-SNEZHNEVSKY INSTITUTE FOR FORENSIC PSYCHIATRY
but i've seen this terrible graph which proves him wrong



good job calling the high schooler a liar though

edit:

oh the terrible graph is gun deaths not overall murders

bean mom
Jan 30, 2009

serious question, out of the field, who do you think is the best lover?

Nolan Arenado
May 8, 2009

Get a haircut Jeb, you look like a goddamn hippie!

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Bryter
Nov 6, 2011

but since we are small we may-
uh, we may be the losers

Zyla posted:

serious question, out of the field, who do you think is the best lover?

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