Axiem posted:

My daughter has on multiple occasions over the past few months stated that her favorite super hero is "Darth Vader!"

Dabir posted:

When I was a kid my mum tried to explain God to me and said something like 'He's a great power'. So naturally I assumed it was electricity.

Judge Schnoopy posted:

My son was playing in his room, whispering to himself, which if you've never experienced from a toddler can be a bit unnerving. I asked him "What are you saying?" "I didn't say nothin!" "What were you whispering? I heard you say something"
"I didn't, the people in my eye are talking."

It took me a few minutes to piece together that he was playing Inside Out, pretending to be the characters that live in his head.

Judge Schnoopy posted:

My 3 year old son is fixated on a game called "Jail."

Tsunemori posted:

You son is a future goon fixated with MMO grinding. Wash his socks!

Kevyn posted:

The other day my sister let her two daughters go out to play in the snow/slush while wearing boots, hats, and jackets over their pajamas. Ten minutes later the four year old comes back in the house with mud all over her pajama pants and says "by accident I had too much fun!"

Soulex posted:

My son, 2 months, has colic something fierce. For anyone who doesn't know, it's essentially gas pains. So after a bout of grunting and fussing this morning my older son went to investigate the commotion. This little 1 and a half year old is awesome and loves his brother already which is hella cool. Anyways the little one finally farts akin to the sound of a balloon letting the air out of its valve, to which the biggun runs away screaming "WHY!?" One of the only words he knows, but drat if he doesn't do it correctly.

I laugh my rear end off because I am also a child and farts are funny.

coronatae posted:

Soulex posted:

My son, 2 months, has colic something fierce. For anyone who doesn't know, it's essentially gas pains. So after a bout of grunting and fussing this morning my older son went to investigate the commotion. This little 1 and a half year old is awesome and loves his brother already which is hella cool. Anyways the little one finally farts akin to the sound of a balloon letting the air out of its valve, to which the biggun runs away screaming "WHY!?" One of the only words he knows, but drat if he doesn't do it correctly.

I laugh my rear end off because I am also a child and farts are funny.

TINY T-REX ARMS posted:

My son is the gassiest child I have ever known. It never bothers him, he just farts with the best of them. One of his favorite things to do is bounce like loving Tigger all over the place and I never cease to laugh at him farting every time he lands on the ground. Jumpin' farts!

Mr Confetti posted:

A friend of mine taught his nephew how to say "DEEZ NUTS". Kid also likes to point at things while doing so. The best part is that because he's only 3-4 yrs old, his height makes it so that everything he points at is generally nutsack level.

His mother is not very pleased.

Megaman's Jockstrap posted:

My son is still very young and is in the stage where he only puts a few words together.

Lately he has been asking me to "wrestle", which is your typical Dad horseplay stuff of grabs and spins and hollering. Anyway after a wrestle session a few days ago he's still not satisfied, and he comes over to me on the couch and says "wrestle!" and I say, "oh daddy needs a break right now, we're about to have dinner." He tries a few more times, then takes my hand and says "papi, walk!" which is my cue to come with him and he usually he takes me over to a toy or book or something and we goof off, or we go see the dogs in the backyard or something else varied. So I stand up and he says "WRESTLE!" with a big smile on his face, like "well buddy you're standing up now so you better wrestle with me". So I did, because I figured he earned it.

Next day, same story, we horseplay around and afterwards I'm sitting down and he comes over and says "wrestle!" and I say "oh bud, we already wrestled, let's read a book" and of course he immediately says "ok, papi, walk!" and I look him in the eye and say "son, I know you're trying to get me to stand up so we can wrestle" and he is silent for a moment and then gently takes my hand and looks at me with the most loving innocent look and says "papi, walk..." very gently and a little sadly. I feel a bit guilty and say "ok" and stand up and he immediately starts giggling so hard he can barely say "w...w...wrestle!" and then literally doubles over with laughter, cracking up at his own cleverness at tricking me. I didn't even have to wrestle with him, he got back up and wandered off to his books, satisfied.

Your Dunkle Sans posted:

That's a smart kid right there! I see great things in his future.

Megaman's Jockstrap posted:

Thank you! He's basically a human text adventure right now. He tries all his verbs on everything, it's adorable.

code:

>"Papi! See moon!"

Yes I see the moon. The moon is white. The moon is round. The moon is in the sky.

>"Papi! Touch moon!"

We can't do that. The moon is too far away.

>"Papi! Hug moon!"

We can't hug the moon. The moon is too far away.

>"Papi! Walk to moon!"

We can't walk to the moon. The moon is above us, in the sky. You can't walk in the sky without wings.

>"Papi, N!"

You are in the front room of the house. The smell of spagetti comes from the kitchen.

An open ziplock bag of cheerios sits here, unattended.

Exits are North, West, and South.

(ok I might have made up the last command)

quote:

Getting ready to leave the house:

Her: "Let me just go look at myself"
Her son: "Let's just leave, you don't look homeless."

kbdragon posted:

At children's sermon time, in front of church:

Pastor: Who's your favorite superhero?
My 3.5 Yr. Old: DARTH VADER!!!!
Entire Church: <cracks up laughing>

At least she's been consistent; this has been her answer to that question for the past few months.

The Mentalizer posted:

When you ask her what she wants to do when she grows up is her answer "Rule the world!"? Because if that's the case you might be raising a super villain.

Bobby Digital posted:

From a friend:

no name for the sake of anonymity posted:

Ice Cream

Cookie dough, cookies and cream
That's ice cream
But we have a cookies and cream conundrum
Sherbert, too
They are all tastylicious
But there is one more
The supercalifragilisticexpialidocious ice cream
But wait, there is the ultimate
Chocolate lava double decker cookie dough
Melt in your mouth sundae
And it's even better when you eat it on Sunday
Then I found out that I was lactose intolerant
So stuff happened

trickybiscuits posted:

Today at the library I picked up a local publication of kids' writing and artwork and had to share this:


All the poetry I've written in my day pales in comparison to those last two lines.

trickybiscuits posted:

Today at the library I picked up a local publication of kids' writing and artwork and had to share this:


All the poetry I've written in my day pales in comparison to those last two lines.

trickybiscuits posted:

Today at the library I picked up a local publication of kids' writing and artwork and had to share this:


All the poetry I've written in my day pales in comparison to those last two lines.