Bitcoin is hilariously broken in 2016

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.random: May 7, 2007

More like bitcon, eh guys?

# ? Feb 2, 2016 18:40

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# ? May 28, 2024 07:34

The Snark: May 19, 2008; by Cowcaster

Buttcon.

# ? Feb 2, 2016 18:42

zedprime: Jun 9, 2007; yospos

Nah, buttcon is what happens when the off license plastic surgeon fills your butt cheeks with cement.

# ? Feb 2, 2016 18:46

Razorwired: Dec 7, 2008; It's about to start!

Onkel Hedwig posted:

I did not know what you meant by that, so I searched for "bitcoin black hole".

Got a lot of strange results, inclduing this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8PFgQmXc5So

If anyone else is wondering or if it didn't show up:

ASIC wizkids at BFL send Wired a rig.

Wired talks it up for a short puff piece that ends in them saying "lol bitcoin is an abstraction. We destroyed the private key and left the rig running!"

Bitcoiners got super mad

http://www.wired.com/2013/05/butterfly_live/

# ? Feb 2, 2016 19:06

Germstore: Oct 17, 2012; A Serious Candidate For a Serious Time

They turned a bitcoin miner into a tears miner. An excellent trade imho.

# ? Feb 2, 2016 19:11

Cyberventurer: Jul 10, 2005

Bad Munki posted:

Or just dumping out a dewar of liquid nitrogen on the floor in a hotel for ultimate cooling!

The video of it is still up. :allears:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ut8mwo7vGBI

# ? Feb 2, 2016 19:39

Dr Cheeto: Mar 2, 2013; Wretched Harp

The Snark posted:

Buttcon.

Buttcon 2016 is gonna be sick, shut your mouth.

# ? Feb 2, 2016 23:19

bird food bathtub: Aug 9, 2003; College Slice

Bubblyblubber posted:

That entire sentence makes no sense in my head. Did... did bitcoins make me retarded just by existing?

Nope, no you're just suffering from the effects of too much Bitcoin at one time. I gave the really condensed version. It's generally safer mentally if you learn about it over a much longer period of time so brain cells don't come to a screeching halt all at one time trying to figure out what the gently caress anything related to Bitcoin is about.

# ? Feb 2, 2016 23:43

The Bible: May 8, 2010

Cyberventurer posted:

The video of it is still up.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ut8mwo7vGBI

This still just baffles me. How does he think this is supposed to work? Why couldn't he be bothered to do even 2 minutes of research?

# ? Feb 3, 2016 00:05

Bad Munki: Nov 4, 2008; We're all mad here.

Because magic

# ? Feb 3, 2016 00:30

Crazy Ted: Jul 29, 2003

Captain Cool posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uPwkTfdZnrM&t=49s

You know something is legit ridiculous when InfoWars is basically making fun of it.

# ? Feb 3, 2016 00:31

Germstore: Oct 17, 2012; A Serious Candidate For a Serious Time

Bad Munki posted:

Because magic

Basically this. The phase change is what does most of the cooling and that's occurring on the floor. He gets extra points because it's possible to asphyxiate yourself with nitrogen without feeling anything.

# ? Feb 3, 2016 00:59

The Duchess Smackarse: May 8, 2012; by Lowtax

How did that heist end? I can't seem to find out!

# ? Feb 3, 2016 00:59

Knot My President!: Jan 10, 2005

vxskud posted:

I'm curious

Does anybody involved in running bitcoin actually have any sort of background in economics or even accounting?

I received my degree in economics, and with such have approached Bitcoin from a classical economic pedigree.

Most (all) people I've interacted with in the cryptocurrency space have received their knowledge of economics through the eco chamber of Bitcoin.

Every single catastrophic shower thought I had in the first five minutes of having Bitcoin explained to me is now being realized by the Bitcoin space and my acquaintances are looking at me like I am some sort of prophet.

I don't have the heart to tell people that I learned more about Bitcoin through trading Pokemon cards than any amount of higher education

# ? Feb 3, 2016 01:02

Terminal Entropy: Dec 26, 2012

The_Franz posted:

People buy IP cameras to keep an eye on kids or elderly relatives and don't bother to secure them because security is hard and makes things inconvenient.

I can understand Joe Schmoe not being able to setup a VPN, but not even setting a basic password on the grandma cam is pretty lazy. Even scarier is when people scan IP addresses and find things like unsecured telnet access to industrial power equipment.

Even when security is enabled, you can get around it with stupid poo poo like changing your browser user agent or use the password that was hardcoded into the firmware that can't be changed. Same goes for routers. Basically, programmers are terrible people.

# ? Feb 3, 2016 01:12

Ivor Biggun: Apr 30, 2003; A big "Fuck You!" from the Keyhole nebula; Lipstick Apathy

Armchair Calvinist posted:

I received my degree in economics, and with such have approached Bitcoin from a classical economic pedigree.

Most (all) people I've interacted with in the cryptocurrency space have received their knowledge of economics through the eco chamber of Bitcoin.

Every single catastrophic shower thought I had in the first five minutes of having Bitcoin explained to me is now being realized by the Bitcoin space and my acquaintances are looking at me like I am some sort of prophet.

I don't have the heart to tell people that I learned more about Bitcoin through trading Pokemon cards than any amount of higher education

Reminds me of this Onion piece: Historians Politely Remind Nation To Check What's Happened In Past Before Making Any Big Decisions

http://www.theonion.com/article/historians-politely-remind-nation-to-check-whats-h-26183

quote:

WASHINGTON�With the United States facing a daunting array of problems at home and abroad, leading historians courteously reminded the nation Thursday that when making tough choices, it never hurts to stop a moment, take a look at similar situations from the past, and then think about whether the decisions people made back then were good or bad.

According to the historians, by looking at things that have already happened, Americans can learn a lot about which actions made things better versus which actions made things worse, and can then plan their own actions accordingly.

"In the coming weeks and months, people will have to make some really important decisions about some really important issues," Columbia University historian Douglas R. Collins said during a press conference, speaking very slowly and clearly so the nation could follow his words. "And one thing we can do, before making a choice that has permanent consequences for our entire civilization, is check real quick first to see if human beings have ever done anything like it previously, and see if turned out to be a good idea or not."

"It's actually pretty simple: We just have to ask ourselves if people doing the same thing in the past caused something bad to happen," Collins continued. "Did the thing we're thinking of doing make people upset? Did it start a war? If it did, then we might want to think about not doing it."

In addition, Collins carefully explained that if a past decision proved to be favorable�if, for example, it led to increased employment, caused fewer deaths, or made lots of people feel good inside� then the nation should consider following through with the same decision now.

While the new strategy, known as "Look Back Before You Act," has raised concerns among people worried they will have to remember lots of events from long ago, the historians have assured Americans they won't be required to read all the way through thick books or memorize anything.

Instead, citizens have been told they can just find a large-print, illustrated timeline of historical events, place their finger on an important moment, and then look to the right of that point to see what happened afterward, paying especially close attention to whether things got worse or better.

"You know how the economy is not doing so well right now?" Professor Elizabeth Schuller of the University of North Carolina said. "Well, in the 1930s, financial markets�no, wait, I'm sorry. Here: A long, long time ago, way far in the past, certain things happened that were a lot like things now, and they made people hungry and sad."

"How do you feel when you're hungry? Doesn't feel good, does it?" Schuller added. "So, maybe we should avoid doing those things that caused people to feel that way, don't you think?"

Concluding their address, the panel of scholars provided a number of guidelines to help implement the strategy, reminding the nation that the biggest decisions required the most looking back, and stressing the importance of checking the past before one makes a decision, not afterward, when the decision has already been made.

While many citizens have expressed skepticism of the historians' assertions, the majority of Americans have reportedly grasped the concept of noticing bad things from earlier times and trying not to repeat them.

"I get it. If we do something bad that happened before, then the same bad thing could happen again," said Barb Ennis, 48, of Pawtucket, RI. "We don't want history to happen again, unless the thing that happened was good."

"When you think about it, a lot of things have happened already," Ennis added. "That's what history is."

In Washington, several elected officials praised the looking-back-first strategy as a helpful, practical tool with the potential to revolutionize government.

"The things the historians were saying seemed complicated at first, but now it makes sense to me," said Sen. John Cornyn (R-TX), who reversed his opposition to oil-drilling safety regulations after checking past events and finding a number of "very, very sad things [he] didn't like." "I just wished they'd told us about this trick before.

Bitcoin: All this has happened before and will happen again.

# ? Feb 3, 2016 03:22

Azathoth: Apr 3, 2001

Ivor Biggun posted:

Bitcoin: All this has happened before and will happen again.

You are the harbinger of death, Satoshi Nakamoto. You will lead them all to their end.

# ? Feb 3, 2016 04:33

Powered Descent: Jul 13, 2008; We haven't had that spirit here since 1969.

Azathoth posted:

You are the harbinger of death, Satoshi Nakamoto. You will lead them all to their end.

There must be some kind of way out of here.

# ? Feb 3, 2016 04:41

Captain Cool: Oct 23, 2004; This is a song about messin' with people who've been messin' with you

gannyGrabber posted:

How did that heist end? I can't seem to find out!

the thieves, probably the operators of sheep marketplace, got away with it, and possibly even cashed out for real money

# ? Feb 3, 2016 05:07

The Duchess Smackarse: May 8, 2012; by Lowtax

Captain Cool posted:

the thieves, probably the operators of sheep marketplace, got away with it, and possibly even cashed out for real money

yessssss

# ? Feb 3, 2016 14:15

A Stupid Baby: Dec 31, 2002; lip up fatty

Wait I thought a bitcoin was like some weird prime number thing you found first and 'claimed'? But now its something you just get assigned for helping people make transactions? And if theres so many of these miner dudes in china helping the transactions why is the network hosed so bad transactions cant go through

THje government should just let people have weed and whatever so people stop doing retarded poo poo like this

# ? Feb 3, 2016 15:13

Mozi: Apr 4, 2004; Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die; Nap Ghost

sounds like they 'bit' off more than their system design would allow, to 'coin' a phrase

# ? Feb 3, 2016 15:17

Crust First: May 1, 2013; Wrong lads.

A Stupid Baby posted:

Wait I thought a bitcoin was like some weird prime number thing you found first and 'claimed'? But now its something you just get assigned for helping people make transactions? And if theres so many of these miner dudes in china helping the transactions why is the network hosed so bad transactions cant go through

THje government should just let people have weed and whatever so people stop doing retarded poo poo like this

The network pays you for processing blocks. You process blocks by finding a random number that hashes to a value that has a number of 0s in front of it that match the current "difficulty". More zeros is more difficult!

You don't actually get paid for processing transactions. In fact, at some potential future point, you may actually make more money processing empty blocks (no transactions included) than you would processing full blocks, if the block size gets too big and fees don't rise.

Also, no matter how many people are processing transactions, the network balances out to always be slow and lovely. Difficulty rises to make sure there's one block every 10 minutes, and this can only handle about 7 transactions per second (max). If blocks never get any bigger, tps will stay lovely forever, even if the entire output of the sun was being used to mine bitcoins.

# ? Feb 3, 2016 15:30

Germstore: Oct 17, 2012; A Serious Candidate For a Serious Time

Crust First posted:

...and this can only handle about 7 transactions per second (max)...

lol

# ? Feb 3, 2016 15:37

Owlofcreamcheese: May 22, 2005; Can't post for 9 years!; Buglord

Germstore posted:

lol

Lol more because 7 was a lie and requires every transaction to be a minimum size no security transaction and using real transactions the limit is about 2.8 transactions per second.

# ? Feb 3, 2016 15:44

bollig: Apr 7, 2006; Never Forget.

So I don't know if this was true, but I think I remembered hearing about someone's house burning down (hoverboard style) because of a buttminer and then because the electronics weren't certified, their insurance wouldn't pay out or something?

# ? Feb 3, 2016 15:45

Quote-Unquote: Oct 22, 2002

Germstore posted:

lol

Realistically it is more like 2-4 max, which wouldn't be enough for a single supermarket chain.

# ? Feb 3, 2016 15:47

Kro-Bar: Jul 24, 2004; USPOL May

Quote-Unquote posted:

Realistically it is more like 2-4 max, which wouldn't be enough for a single supermarket chain.

My produce would start wilting before my transaction was confirmed! :derp:

# ? Feb 3, 2016 15:53

Senor Tron: May 26, 2006

Ah Bitcoin thread, it's been too long my old friend.

Do we have any idea what Bruce Wagner is up to nowadays?

edit: http://bitcoinme.com/forum/viewforum.php?f=2 :lol:

Senor Tron fucked around with this message at 16:14 on Feb 3, 2016

# ? Feb 3, 2016 16:04

revmoo: May 25, 2006; #basta

Senor Tron posted:

Ah Bitcoin thread, it's been too long my old friend.

Do we have any idea what Bruce Wagner is up to nowadays?

edit: http://bitcoinme.com/forum/viewforum.php?f=2

Hahah. He apparently also runs (and posts to himself constantly) http://supersmartpeople.com/forum

# ? Feb 3, 2016 16:20

Mozi: Apr 4, 2004; Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die; Nap Ghost

i gotta go set up evensmarterpeoplethantheothersmartpeopleforum.com

# ? Feb 3, 2016 16:23

Gutcruncher: Apr 16, 2005; Go home and be a family man!

The only person I know with bitcoins spends his time watching YouTube videos of nerds screaming about those darned Christians

That's my Bitcoin story

# ? Feb 3, 2016 16:25

Barco Fiesta: May 26, 2009; a fantasy of olives

has anyone ever used bitcoins for anything besides drugs

# ? Feb 3, 2016 16:34

Quote-Unquote: Oct 22, 2002

Glass Bottom Boat posted:

has anyone ever used bitcoins for anything besides drugs

i bet a bunch of people used it to buy child porn and guns
and that one guy bought a pizza

# ? Feb 3, 2016 16:39

Tricky D: Apr 1, 2005; I love um!

When I worked for a insurance recovery company, I had the pleasure of helping strip down a really nice law office who's server room had mysteriously caught fire. I didn't think anything of it until the owner, who loved to talk about how his son was a genius with a full ride scholarship to MIT but turned it down to be in the family business, mentioned off hand that that same son was mining bitcoins in the office.

# ? Feb 3, 2016 16:44

P-Mack: Nov 10, 2007

Quote-Unquote posted:

Realistically it is more like 2-4 max, which wouldn't be enough for a single supermarket chain.

It's almost like the technology was just a neat proof of concept, not a replacement for the global economic system.

# ? Feb 3, 2016 17:04

poverty goat: Feb 15, 2004

P-Mack posted:

It's almost like the technology was just a neat proof of concept, not a replacement for the global economic system.

also no matter what you think of bitcoin it's still better and faster and cheaper for sending money internationally than western union and moneygram, as long as the recipient can turn it back into money or drugs or something usable at the other end (this is because moneygram and western union are terrible, not because bitcoin is good)

# ? Feb 3, 2016 17:27

Germstore: Oct 17, 2012; A Serious Candidate For a Serious Time

The Goatfather posted:

also no matter what you think of bitcoin it's still better and faster and cheaper for sending money internationally than western union and moneygram, as long as the recipient can turn it back into money or drugs or something usable at the other end

that's a hell of an if.

# ? Feb 3, 2016 17:29