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Yeah, nothing redpilly, just really really sad unhealthy brains feeding into hosed up codependent nerd orgies. God I wish I could remember some specific stories. I was briefly near the end and after highschool a member of the local anime club because this was pre-internet and the only way to see these amazing cartoons was through a friend of a friend who has a hook up getting VHS's with subs from japan. This was the late 90's so all the girls in the group were sort of goth. Every single one was some sort of "artist" and competing to be queen-bee of their own little nerd circle of gross desperate guys. After the anime club all the "artists" would set up and show off their work and bask in the compliments no matter how bad their errotic furry dragon demon manga was. I stayed far away from these people but there was a lot of drama and sometimes outright nerd fights between the guys because one queen-bee would accuse another of ripping their art off or saying something nasty and they'd dispatch their loyal followers like they were throwing a pokeball. There ain't no fight like a nerd fight. Screaming, hair pulling, crying, all within 5-10 seconds of the "fight" beginning. I felt so deeply ashamed to be even remotely part of the same "group" and quickly stopped going, specially when video stores started to carry anime. But yeah, I can see where a lot of gross nerds get /redpill ideas when their only understanding of socialization are hosed up groups like these. It can't be their fault for being pathetic sacks of desperate poo poo of course, it's those manipulative fee-males.
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Jan 13, 2016 03:35
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Just wanted to pop in and say I've enjoyed all the stories in the thread, and also that I've experienced one of those "Queen Bees" myself back in Highschool, in 2009 I think. It was almost a Shoemaker-Levy 9 experience, I was showing off this catkiller-sized astrology book I had received, and passed too close to her orbit of goths. Somehow, I'm still unclear how, I managed to catch a hickey from this collar-wearing Jupiter. Mercifully I'd picked up enough good sense and speed to escape and make it back to my end of the cafeteria yard. Not much else to tell, talking to her was a fluke so that's really the only story I have to tell.
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Jan 13, 2016 16:42
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Control Volume posted:this was an okay post until you started quoting /r/redpill He wasn't quoting /r/redpill. He was explaining why /r/redpill exists. Also I found the screenshot. The situation fishmech described isn't the'real reason.' It's a consequence of the actual real reason:  Resident forums primordial furry fan Doodles made a huge effortpost about it back in the day but I can't find a link. I didn't have any contact with 'furry people' after I broke up with Shelley until an early ALOD around 2001ish
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Jan 14, 2016 03:30
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Probably one of the biggest issues is people with legitimate mental illnesses falling into situations like that because they get validation. That's one of the biggest issues with the nerd social fallacies; instead of telling a legit crazy person to seek help it's "everybody else is the problem not you." Whereas everybody else has gotten sick of their bad behavior they finally found a place where they're coddled and allowed to be horrible. I think this is part of where the sudden prevalence of "if people can't handle your anxiety problems the problem is them not you" comes from. Instead of getting therapy and treatment they just get encouraged; then their problems get worse, lather, rinse, repeat. They're also frequently parasite singles that have literally nothing else going on in their lives other than living in their parents' basement and maybe working some lovely part-time job. And in some ways can we really blame them? The job market is absolute poo poo right now. Their parent's generation isn't retiring so their jobs aren't coming available and even if they were they're being eliminated. Everything is more expensive too so they can't afford houses or easily afford college. And even if they could afford college their circle will tell them the professors are jerks that just want to make their lives harder so they make classes impossible. A long while back Lowtax gave a very, very good talk on the internet and what it does socially. One of the issues these nerd fallacy-prone groups have is based on this. He pointed out that the internet "tends to kind of concentrate things." People can very easily get online and find whatever sort of social group they want.
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Jan 14, 2016 05:59
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Yeah but plenty of people with mental illness have literally no insight into themselves and their behaviour and just write off any advice as being nonsense and continue their dysfunctional behaviour. So no amount of honest advice will help some people.
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Jan 15, 2016 11:46
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inokichi posted:Yeah but plenty of people with mental illness have literally no insight into themselves and their behaviour and just write off any advice as being nonsense and continue their dysfunctional behaviour. So no amount of honest advice will help some people. Right, but it's a lot easier to do this if you can point to your intornet hovel and say "But all THOSE people say I'm perfect just the way I am, and if you have a problem with that, it means there's a problem with you!!!!" It gives a person a mistaken sense of strength in numbers.
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Jan 15, 2016 13:13
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I've always thought that one of the biggest strengths of the internet, the ability to bring people together, specifically like minded people, is also it's biggest downfall/danger.
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Jan 15, 2016 14:46
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This video reminded me of the story: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9wO5TnYaJ4o
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Jan 15, 2016 15:31
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ToxicSlurpee posted:A long while back Lowtax gave a very, very good talk on the internet and what it does socially. One of the issues these nerd fallacy-prone groups have is based on this. He pointed out that the internet "tends to kind of concentrate things." People can very easily get online and find whatever sort of social group they want. Lowtax is all three Norns tangled together in their string, and plugged into the ethernet ports of a supercomputer, in terms of prescience. 11 years old, and still as true as it was when first given. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RYrz_1hV0OU
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Jan 15, 2016 16:18
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It's worth noting that there were all sorts of weirdo support groups and mailing lists and the like long before the internet. If you ever get a hold of this old book series called the People's Almanac, they list a good deal of them that were present in the 70s and then for later editions, the 80s. It wasn't quite as easy to find them as it is to find their modern equivalents, but they'd still be findable with a trip to most local libraries.
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Jan 15, 2016 17:55
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The book High Weirdness By Mail, which was a Church of the Sub-Genius thing, is a great little overview of the strangest of the crazy zines and newsletters that abounded in pre-Internet days.
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Jan 16, 2016 03:32
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AlbieQuirky posted:The book High Weirdness By Mail, which was a Church of the Sub-Genius thing, is a great little overview of the strangest of the crazy zines and newsletters that abounded in pre-Internet days. Man I'd been thinking of that too but hadn't remembered the name of it in ages. Thanks!
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Jan 16, 2016 04:11
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inokichi posted:Yeah but plenty of people with mental illness have literally no insight into themselves and their behaviour and just write off any advice as being nonsense and continue their dysfunctional behaviour. So no amount of honest advice will help some people. True but most people with mental issues you can get them to go get help. People so far gone they'll refuse to get help and assume they don't need it are a minority. Generally speaking people with issues probably have some inkling that something is wrong with their life but aren't sure what. It can take doing but people with issues can get help if they're prodded enough. People in situations like this one are being actively prodded away from getting help. People that would otherwise get help are finding places where they're being told they're perfectly fine the way they are which is absolutely not how you get mental illnesses fixed.
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Jan 16, 2016 04:20
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AlbieQuirky posted:The book High Weirdness By Mail, which was a Church of the Sub-Genius thing, is a great little overview of the strangest of the crazy zines and newsletters that abounded in pre-Internet days. And now, thanks to the internet, nothing's shocking or weird.
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Jan 16, 2016 04:25
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fishmech posted:It's worth noting that there were all sorts of weirdo support groups and mailing lists and the like long before the internet. If you ever get a hold of this old book series called the People's Almanac, they list a good deal of them that were present in the 70s and then for later editions, the 80s. It wasn't quite as easy to find them as it is to find their modern equivalents, but they'd still be findable with a trip to most local libraries. I read the hell out of my dad's copies as a kid and hoo boy in retrospect those weren't at all appropriate for li'l me.
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Jan 18, 2016 02:09
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Haskell9 posted:He wasn't quoting /r/redpill. He was explaining why /r/redpill exists. I've seen the same arguments coming from real life people when I was at a STEM college that was 83% male or something ridiculous I forget. Maybe it was because people were there to start their career in tge fairly tough fields of aero/electrical engineering as opposed to a nerdy hobby, but the dynamics described (gross ladies trying to be queen of the nerds, sex with all the men in their retinue, etc.) didn't exist. What did exist, however, was the dogged insistence that all the women there were gross and toxic and entitled. A majority of the girls in that college ultimately sought relationships outside the college or just stayed single because, in contrast to the nerd queen arguments, they didn't want anything to do with any men at that college after spending over year having to deal with their poo poo. Didn't stop those theories from being popular, though. Control Volume fucked around with this message at 20:50 on Jan 18, 2016 |
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Jan 18, 2016 20:48
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Control Volume posted:I've seen the same arguments coming from real life people when I was at a STEM college that was 83% male or something ridiculous I forget. Maybe it was because people were there to start their career in tge fairly tough fields of aero/electrical engineering as opposed to a nerdy hobby, but the dynamics described (gross ladies trying to be queen of the nerds, sex with all the men in their retinue, etc.) didn't exist. What did exist, however, was the dogged insistence that all the women there were gross and toxic and entitled. A majority of the girls in that college ultimately sought relationships outside the college or just stayed single because, in contrast to the nerd queen arguments, they didn't want anything to do with any men at that college after spending over year having to deal with their poo poo. Didn't stop those theories from being popular, though. It generally seems to be a thing mostly with teens and people who have emotional regulation issues, which in both cases aren't as likely to end up in STEM colleges. That, and the theorizers probably formed their image of male/female interaction before they got to college. I mean, just because it's wrong on an overall societal scale doesn't mean that the behaviour doesn't exist.
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Jan 19, 2016 03:38
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Control Volume posted:I was at a STEM college that was 83% male or something ridiculous I forget. Maybe it was because people were there to start their career in tge fairly tough fields of aero/electrical engineering as opposed to a nerdy hobby, but the dynamics described (gross ladies trying to be queen of the nerds, sex with all the men in their retinue, etc.) didn't exist. Of course they didn't. Read Puppy Time's post please, or perhaps the last two pages of the thread. The Nerd Queen phenomenon, while quite real, is not going to exist in a STEM college because the defining characteristic of a 'nerd queen' is a complete inability to accept criticism of any kind about anything. People like that regardless of groin plumbing do not end up in STEM colleges. The defining characteristic of a nerd queen satellite by contrast is an awkward, desperate male nerd with broken ideas about human interaction. These individuals again by contrast are not rare in STEM colleges, hence your experience.
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Jan 20, 2016 05:26
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Haskell9 posted:...a complete inability to accept criticism of any kind about anything. People like that regardless of groin plumbing do not end up in STEM colleges. You clearly have never attended a STEM college any time in the past ever, lmbo.
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Jan 20, 2016 05:49
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Haskell9 posted:Of course they didn't. Read Puppy Time's post please, or perhaps the last two pages of the thread. The Nerd Queen phenomenon, while quite real, is not going to exist in a STEM college because the defining characteristic of a 'nerd queen' is a complete inability to accept criticism of any kind about anything. People like that regardless of groin plumbing do not end up in STEM colleges. The defining characteristic of a nerd queen satellite by contrast is an awkward, desperate male nerd with broken ideas about human interaction. These individuals again by contrast are not rare in STEM colleges, hence your experience. that's a lot of words to say that you have no idea how socially broken people at stem colleges are
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Jan 20, 2016 07:23
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[a virginal engineering major with a hat collection entirely sourced from the set of the untouchables]: those bitches are just slutting it up around desperate losers, and i want nothing to do with it, this is why i don't have sex ever [a nerd, but one of the good ones]: well hell, i agree. glad this stem college is full of such rational folk
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Jan 20, 2016 07:39
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I freely admit for the sake of argument everything posted beneath me. Which doesn't change anything. Hey Puppy Time, wanna chime in here?
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Jan 20, 2016 08:10
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I can't help much WRT STEM college students; I went to an art college, and most of my non-art nerd circles at the time weren't college based. My main point is that all the Nerd Queen types I've known (I can think of two in particular that I've had really close contact with) had MAJOR emotional issues, stuff that made it really hard for them to do anything consistently that required a good deal of work and dedication. I think one did make it into college pursuing a marine biology career, but is currently a hausfrau because she just doesn't have the gumption to get past her mental illness into something more.* The Nerd Queen is generally a person with really crap internal problems- mostly anxiety and depression, though borderline personality disorder also seems p. common- that have kept her from properly joining healthier social circles. So she ends up in the Geek Social Fallacy pits, where suddenly it's really, really easy to get praise and attention, because all you have to do is have tits, flirt, and be into the geeknerd stuff you're already into. (And you already want to do all that, because you're a dumb teen, and you think that attention from boys is the best thing ever.) Like I said before, I was kind of a Nerd Queen in my own circles, though I avoided a lot of the really crappy behavior thanks to having been raised well and being really picky about who I dated. (I think also my emotional issues weren't nearly as deep as the other Queens'- I just have mild chronic depression and social anxiety, while one is literally textbook BPD, and the other seems very likely also BPD.) From my perspective at the time, all the over-the-top male adulation made sense and seemed normal, because I didn't have any real life social experience, and got all my knowledge from the lovely animes we watched. I only got out of the mindset because I had a commitment to improving myself, socially and creatively. If just having local adulation were all it took to stave off my self loathing, I probably would have been a full-on Nerd Queen myself. I was just lucky to have an extremely supportive and healthy family and the ability to analyze my own behavior. The point of all this is that Nerd Queens either mature out of the behavior because they're usually dumb teens that turn into reasonably intelligent (if still probably hella awkward and nerdy) adults, or they never advance because they're drowning in emotional issues, remaining big fish in tiny ponds and often attaching to someone else for support. They don't tend to show up in higher education (ESPECIALLY higher education like STEM that tends to incur a lot of hostility from misogynist rear end in a top hat students) because it's too much work for no perceived payoff. If a thing does not make them happy right now, it's not worth it. (One of my acquaintances did amazing art, and could easily have made a lucrative career out of it, but just dropped it because it didn't earn her easy adulation compared to- I poo poo you not- roleplaying on livejournal. It's that level of bad.) I'm hoping this has been clear enough; I'm trying to boil years of my life and a lot of complicated relationships down to something simple. If y'all need anything cleared up further, or have other questions, I guess I'm cool with sharing. (Sadly I do not have any exciting stories, outside of apparently one of my fellow Nerd Queens stabbing a mattress with a knife chanting "Die, Puppy Time, die!" out of jealousy. We were mostly just bog-standard broken nerds, rather than extravagantly broken  )*This isn't meant as a criticism or a bootstraps statement so much as an illustration of why this personality type doesn't seem to go far into higher education and beyond.
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Jan 20, 2016 18:27
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Puppy Time posted:Sadly I do not have any exciting stories, outside of apparently one of my fellow Nerd Queens stabbing a mattress with a knife chanting "Die, Puppy Time, die!" out of jealousy. 
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Jan 20, 2016 19:26
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Puppy Time posted:outside of apparently one of my fellow Nerd Queens stabbing a mattress with a knife chanting "Die, Puppy Time, die!" out of jealousy.  It was funnier for a sec when I forgot your forums name was Puppytime and thought that this is literally what they were chanting.
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Jan 20, 2016 19:29
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There's a difference between saying that some nerd circles, especially in high school, were incredibly dysfunctional and codependent versus this:Baronjutter posted:They'll often have slept with most of the nerds in the group, many of them became part of the group after an "exclusive" relationship that then faded out or she started loving other nerds, but being so spineless they stick around and "stay friends" (often with benefits). which is the nearly word for word the same resentful "I'm too good for sex" screed I heard from multiple guys in college. It's a really loving weird obsession with the sex other people are having.
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Jan 20, 2016 19:50
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I mean I guess the alternative is that the vague 20 year old memory of a high school anime club is actually extremely correct and this guy has laserlike insight into the sexual habits of people he has been very outspoken about not associating with.
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Jan 20, 2016 20:27
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Sadly, that's about all there is to the story: We were both Nerd Queens in the same circle, she was apparently super jealous of me (I was slightly more attractive and a lot better at art than she was) and she was kind of crazy. I didn't know her too well, since at the time I was at college out of state and only got to hang out with everyone during breaks. Control Volume posted:There's a difference between saying that some nerd circles, especially in high school, were incredibly dysfunctional and codependent versus this: It's part of the crazy, tho, especially in circles where there's only a few girls. I mean, being sexually desirable is super important to many girls in general, doubly so for nerd girls because we skew awkward and not all that pretty (and often don't know what the gently caress when it comes to hygeine and makeup), triply so for Nerd Queens because of the need for attention. If a guy wants sex from you, that's good, and he's your friend, so he's obviously a Good Guy, so he deserves something nice; if you refuse him, he might be upset with you, and then you risk getting negative attention from the group, and then where will you be? It leads to a situation where the guys are (usually) hoping for a girlfriend, while the girl is just hoping not to be rejected. The not-stabby girl of my circle's trio wasn't very good at setting boundaries, so she let relationships go a lot farther than she actually wanted, and never bothered with actually articulating anything, just trying to manipulate the other party into breaking up with her, because otherwise she might have to deal with directly causing unhappiness, which might hurt her group standing. The stabby girl was worse, and was notorious for sleeping around on her boyfriends/husband, while getting enraged if they even talked to another girl. (Like I said earlier, I avoided a lot of this by not dating within the circle and generally being single for most of my time.) In all the cases, the problem wasn't the aount of the sex itself, but that it was generally unethical and with poor boundaries. It's not usually a secret; in a lot of cases, it seems to be a pretty influential aspect of the overall social dynamic, with sex being part of a measure of who's got the higher social standing. It's pretty easy to see how nerd guys coming from these insular and hosed-up situations would form a hosed-up view of how social interaction works, since they haven't directly experienced a healthy circle.
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Jan 20, 2016 21:45
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Puppy Time posted:In all the cases, the problem wasn't the aount of the sex itself, but that it was generally unethical and with poor boundaries. Baronjutter posted:That was always my most shocking discovery upon meeting those types of really gross nerds, there is a LOT of sex going on. That fat slightly gothy girl with the odd smell and the "big personality" ? Yeah she's hosed every one of these pimply twiggy nerds in the anime club, sometimes at the same time, and she loves to talk about it you repressed judgemental normie. can you see why I thought his post was offputting yet
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Jan 20, 2016 22:12
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I feel like you should probably let it go
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Jan 20, 2016 22:13
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Aight
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Jan 20, 2016 23:40
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Another thing that makes it worse is that many educational institutions have a rule that all "official" student organizations that take school funding or use school space need to be open to all students. Of course, the intent is great, make sure everyone has a chance to participate, and prevent shared resources from being monopolized by closed groups. The downside is that if you have a massive creep in your RPG group you can't kick them out unless they actually violate official policy and you're willing to report them.
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Jan 21, 2016 01:01
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i did a minor follow up at the AUG thread but i probably should post them hereThe Saddest Rhino posted:if you have read this, i just want to let you know latest updates are I found Henriette's self-published self-help book in bookstores, so go her (?) kizudarake posted:Holy poo poo. Does it mention Sai Baba? The Saddest Rhino posted:it's about using the philosophies of ancient Chinese sages to channel your thoughts into the astral dimension, towards positive thinking and success. She has also a small but apparently successful wellness & health business (through kooky pseudoscience) too! Such Fun posted:Did she get half a house in the divorce? The Saddest Rhino posted:yes, but in the will. Stoatbringer posted:How's her stage magic coming along? The Saddest Rhino posted:She's gives talks on wellness and crystals, no Bollywood musicals though also the link is now http://www.scribd.com/doc/76780402/Something-Awful-Henriette-Saga?secret_password=h3jrq5kg3tx97rrsipe
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Jan 21, 2016 14:26
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The Saddest Rhino posted:i did a minor follow up at the AUG thread but i probably should post them here Thanks, I stopped following that thread because it's one of the few threads here that actually makes me feel too morally lovely to partake in. I appreciate you sharing the continuation here.
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Jan 21, 2016 22:16
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Control Volume posted:can you see why I thought his post was offputting yet Yes because you're a fat, slightly gothy girl with an odd smell and big persona- sweeperbravo posted:I feel like you should probably let it go You mature and reasonable people ruin every good flamewar. 
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Jan 27, 2016 03:38
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Konstantin posted:Another thing that makes it worse is that many educational institutions have a rule that all "official" student organizations that take school funding or use school space need to be open to all students. Of course, the intent is great, make sure everyone has a chance to participate, and prevent shared resources from being monopolized by closed groups. The downside is that if you have a massive creep in your RPG group you can't kick them out unless they actually violate official policy and you're willing to report them. This is absolutely an issue. I was involved in running one such group embarrassingly recently, and even when you could actually get people to agree that someone needs to go, the administration wouldn't even let you start the process of ejecting a member without specific documentation of multiple incidents to establish a pattern of ill behavior.
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Jan 27, 2016 08:19
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Hello everyone, on behalf of one of the friends who really helped me out with recovering from my time with Kry (and who has also been reading this thread), I'd like to thank everyone who has contributed to the thread and also those who convinced me to call it quits and get out of there. They put it best though, so let me just quote them directly here:quote:While I was waiting for the bread dough to rise, I read through that old SomethingAwful thread that finally convinced you to break it off with Kry. First of all, these people are amazing. I wish I could hug every one of them, especially Uglynoodles for starting the thread, and all the people who unequivocally supported you and yelled THAT IS NOT OK as soon as they got a whiff of what was going on. How wonderfully sanity-affirming! Either way, I think it's worth saying. Ya dun gud thread. ya dun gud 
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Feb 7, 2016 18:52
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If only more people could stop digging further into the well and pull yourself out as you did. Glad to have contributed to stating how horrible a situation you were in and very glad to see that you saw the crazy for what it was and got out.
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Feb 7, 2016 19:25
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The Saddest Rhino posted:i did a minor follow up at the AUG thread but i probably should post them here Or, if are you wanting to go mobile/hate Scribd (like I do)... https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/22088467/76780402-Something-Awful-Henriette-Saga.pdf
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Feb 7, 2016 22:06
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I'm through to about page 60 or so of this thread and I'm wondering are people still posting stories up here? Also it's fine if I'm the delusional one in the story right? If so I would like to present Ask me about believing anime characters were going to come save me from my boring life for way too long Up through high school I believed with religious fervor that someday these original (super original do not steal) characters from my imagination were going to appear in our world and take me away. See I was a 'seer', I was one of the only people in the universe who could see their past, present and future. I could warn them about hard battles they would have and keep some of them from dying and stuff! So they'd come and get me and I would be their super cool friend who would go around with them on their adventures. Their 'adventures' consisted of going around fixing all the bad things that happened in any book, anime, video game etc. that I happened to like. They would save characters who were supposed to die, beat down arrogant villains and basically eliminate any tension from anything ever by being perfect and invincible (at the time I didn't understand how boring fiction would be if it lacked any loss or sad moments whatsoever.) And I seriously believed this to the extent that I'd be sitting in a high school assembly or something and suddenly I'd feel a kind of deja vu moment of disorientation and I'd think 'This is it! They're coming! It's going to happen right now!' and get all excited. Then it wouldn't happen and I'd get kind of crestfallen and tell myself that it would definitely happen soon. In the meantime I 'seer'ed away all the time, constantly thinking about all the adventures these guys were having/going to have. I had all my favorite anime/books/video games divided up into different 'dimensions' with their own intricate backstories and sets of rules (the 'Disney' dimension was a totalitarian regime run by (a human) Simba, 'Redwall' was neutral ground where the heroes would often visit to relax etc.) I thought about what would happen to me when they picked me up, which was really going to happen so I had to think real hard about how to escape all the danger I would be in and how to be cool and win the hearts of all the anime girls from the anime dimensions they'd take me around to. I never really confided any of this to anyone though. The few times I brought any of this up to a friend I would present the original characters and stuff as characters from a novel series I would someday write (I wasn't actually going to write it, of course... they'd come get me before I ever had time to do that. Maybe I'd write it as a memoir though, after I decided to settle down and stop saving the Universe). But I think I only ever told any given friend about this once, because I was frustrated at not being able to tell them ALL of it. I legitimately thought about this stuff nonstop all through middle and some of high school so there was something like 6 years worth of story to this all. Looking back, I guess the thing that's the most embarrassing about this is I didn't really have an excuse for this level of escapism. I was just really arrogant. I figured there was no way I wasn't supposed to play some huge world-changing part in all of reality, so naturally these things were going to happen so I could take my rightful place as Universal Badass. Even after I finally realized that no fantasy characters were coming to take me away, I still had delusions of becoming a fiction author so good I'd like change the world or completely change how people wrote fantasy stories after me. I'd get into cycles of depression because playing video games or watching anime or whatever was WASTING TIME that should have been spent writing my amazing epic stories that would change the world. I would get into bouts of self-loathing for not living up to my potential as the greatest author of all time. I'm better now. I still write, but I do it as a hobby now and hey maybe if I plunk away at it enough to eventually hammer out a novel I'll run it by an editor or something and maybe get it published but it's not really a goal anymore. I have normal people goals now and a normal person life and outlook on life. It's kind of fun remembering all the crazy stuff I thought about back then, though, so if anyone cares I can dig a little deeper into my particular brand of crazy. And speaking of crazy, I'm not sure if this is related to my delusions in a kind of 'this guy's brain is effed up' physical way, but the only (other) big psychologically abnormal thing I can remember about my teenage years is that sometimes I'd have these weird bouts of anxiety. I'd be doing something perfectly normal and everyday and suddenly I'd stop and my brain would go 'Wait are you sure people do this thing? Aren't you remembering it wrong? What if someone sees you doing this thing and makes fun of you because it's so weird and no one does it?' The one that sticks out the most is showering. Now, don't get me wrong I showered daily and had fine hygiene, it was just sometimes I'd get in the shower and suddenly that weird anxiety would strike me and I'd be like 'poo poo someone's going to walk into the bathroom and see me naked and be like 'wtf are you doing!?' because who the hell gets naked and cleans themselves with water in a shower? Do people really do that?' and then a second later I'd remember that I and everyone I knew did it every day of their lives and it was perfectly normal and go on with the rest of my day. But those moments were very vivid and memorable. Fake Edit: Come to think of it, I believed that magical beings were going to come to Earth at an unknown date, punish all the people around me who were mean to me while also showing them that I was so much better than them and then they would take me away to a magical world where I would always be happy. But only if I believed in them enough. Why yes I am a Christian why do you ask?
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Feb 12, 2016 01:49
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