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B.B. Rodriguez
Aug 8, 2005

Bender: "I was God once." God: "Yes, I saw. You were doing well until everyone died."

She's the ultra liberal candidate they put up first before submitting the more moderate 'second' choice that ultimately gets nominated.

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Pook Good Mook
Aug 6, 2013


ENFORCE THE UNITED STATES DRESS CODE AT ALL COSTS!

This message paid for by the Men's Wearhouse& Jos A Bank Lobbying Group
Decently researched ESPN story into Chuck Blazer's role in the investigation of FIFA: http://espn.go.com/espn/feature/story/_/id/14767250/the-exclusive-story-how-feds-took-fifa

Lladre
Jun 28, 2011


Soiled Meat
Prince Ali bin al-Hussein requests postponement of Fifa presidential election.

Because he want's transparent booths.

http://www.theguardian.com/football/2016/feb/23/prince-ali-bin-al-hussein-suspension-fifa-presidential-election

Living Image
Apr 24, 2010

HORSE'S ASS

It's kind of amazing to watch all these Arabic autocrats flaunt their total lack of interest in democracy on the global stage. Usually it's confined to their own nasty little regimes, but we're literally having an election for a global sporting body where candidates have suggested that they should be allowed to run unopposed or that we should do away with secret ballots. All this with a backdrop of everyone involved in FIFA being banned for corruption, and Blatter having openly come out and said that Qatar was Platini's fault because he was bribed to change the result of the already-rigged vote at the last minute.

B.B. Rodriguez
Aug 8, 2005

Bender: "I was God once." God: "Yes, I saw. You were doing well until everyone died."

Lladre posted:

Prince Ali bin al-Hussein requests postponement of Fifa presidential election.

Because he want's transparent booths.

http://www.theguardian.com/football/2016/feb/23/prince-ali-bin-al-hussein-suspension-fifa-presidential-election

Out of all the candidates, Prince Ali of Jordan is probably the least objectionable.

jyrka
Jan 21, 2005


Potato Count: 2 small potatoes
What's wrong with a public vote? These FA presidents aren't giving their personal vote. They're voting on behalf of the clubs and players in their nation with no way to prove how they really voted.

Lutha Mahtin
Oct 10, 2010

Your brokebrain sin is absolved...go and shitpost no more!

yeah i thought everyone itt agreed that secret ballots just let corrupt FAs hide their corruption more easily

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

jyrka posted:

What's wrong with a public vote? These FA presidents aren't giving their personal vote. They're voting on behalf of the clubs and players in their nation with no way to prove how they really voted.

A secret ballot allows them to vote for the actual best candidate without the potential of retribution against themselves, the clubs and players in their nation, their FA, and their national team from FIFA, the newly elected FIFA people, the defeated FIFA candidates, and the heads of their continental confederations.

With public ballots, there is big pressure on the members of (for example) CAF and the AFC to vote along with the head of their confederation, who have already said that their confederations will unite and vote as a bloc for certain candidates. With secret ballots, every single member of those confederations is theoretically empowered to vote for the actual best candidate and then act bewildered when the votes don't add up the way the heads of their confederations said they would. In theory, this leads to fairer results because each person is free to vote their conscience and then lie about it.

In practice, in an organization as corrupt as FIFA, I can't imagine it would make a huge difference because all these people are corrupt enough that instead of voting their conscience they will vote for whoever bribes them, and then either lie about it or be brazen about it, who gives a poo poo. Bring on the transparent booths so we at least know who bought whom.

distortion park
Apr 25, 2011


The transparent booths are not meant to be so that they know who voted for who, it's so that you can check that no one is recording their vote or something.

Cliff Racer
Mar 24, 2007

by Lowtax
Serious allegations have brought, implying that South Africa actually lost the voting in its World Cup bid to Morocco, with FIFA officials fudging the vote. If transparent voting had been in place this would not have been possible. In that sense, though it is sad, it probably would be good to have.

TheBigAristotle
Feb 8, 2007

I'm tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money.
I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok.

Grimey Drawer
Sepp Blatter: FBI investigating FIFA because U.S. missed 2022 World Cup

No poo poo

Shoren
Apr 6, 2011

victoria concordia crescit

Well, they had been investigating all this long before the 2022 vote, but the timing of the arrests was definitely meant to send a message not to collude against the US.

oldman
Dec 15, 2003
grumpy
Hadn't he said that before? Like last year?

Troy Queef
Jan 12, 2013




Platini and Blatter just had their bans cut by two years "in recognition of their services to football".

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall

Troy Queef posted:

Platini and Blatter just had their bans cut by two years "in recognition of their services to football".

It's like they all have an addiction and can't control themselves

African AIDS cum
Feb 29, 2012


Welcome back, welcome back, welcome baaaack

foobardog posted:

So one of the assholes on the Supreme Court died and the rumor is that the current expected nominee is Loretta Lynch, the Attorney General driving the FIFA investigations.

Now, the chance that Congress approves her is low because they want to wait for the chance for President Trump to make a nominee, but I'm afraid Prince Ali got to his fellow Muslim Obama, and football's going on hajj.

This is one of the worst posts I have ever read. Are you John Oliver IRL

Sneaks McDevious
Jul 29, 2010

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN
A bad post

tk
Dec 10, 2003

Nap Ghost

Troy Queef posted:

Platini and Blatter just had their bans cut by two years "in recognition of their services to football".

I thought the bans were recognition of their services to football.

Crazy Ted
Jul 29, 2003

tk posted:

I thought the bans were recognition of their services to football.
The bans were recognition of their services to each other :mmmhmm:

NTRabbit
Aug 15, 2012

i wear this armour to protect myself from the histrionics of hysterical women

bitches




Spangly A posted:

It's like they all have an addiction and can't control themselves

https://twitter.com/DamianCollins/status/702428537656090625

Skinty McEdger
Mar 9, 2008

I have NEVER received the respect I deserve as the leader and founder of The Masterflock, the internet's largest and oldest Christopher Masterpiece fan group in all of history, and I DEMAND that changes. From now on, you will respect Skinty McEdger!

Apparently Blatter is very upset because the 100 million quid Fifa museum that was his baby has had most of the content regarding him removed. One of my friends who has already been there ahead of the opening to write about it tells me that if this is with minimal Blatter content then must have been on every surface before.

Dunban
Jul 4, 2012

OH MY GOD GLOVER

Troy Queef posted:

Platini and Blatter just had their bans cut by two years "in recognition of their services to football".

Just in time to attend the 2022 World Cup, what luck!

Munin
Nov 14, 2004


Skinty McEdger posted:

Apparently Blatter is very upset because the 100 million quid Fifa museum that was his baby has had most of the content regarding him removed. One of my friends who has already been there ahead of the opening to write about it tells me that if this is with minimal Blatter content then must have been on every surface before.

The god of football needs his temple and they can have no god but him.

Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011

𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen
𝅘𝅥𝅮
Hooray for election day! For us insomniac Americans, it'll be televised on FS1 and on ESPN3 online.

B.B. Rodriguez
Aug 8, 2005

Bender: "I was God once." God: "Yes, I saw. You were doing well until everyone died."

Don't worry, I'm sure the guy who tortures people from Bahrain already bought enough votes.

El Hefe
Oct 31, 2006

You coulda had a V8/
Instead of a tre-eight slug to yo' cranium/
I got six and I'm aimin' 'em/
Will I bust or keep you guessin'

B.B. Rodriguez posted:

Don't worry, I'm sure the guy who tortures people from Bahrain already bought enough votes.

There's an American guy running?

B.B. Rodriguez
Aug 8, 2005

Bender: "I was God once." God: "Yes, I saw. You were doing well until everyone died."

El Hefe posted:

There's an American guy running?

No he got arrested for buying a $10m apartment for his cats.

Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011

𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen
𝅘𝅥𝅮
Bad choice of a control question there.

PlantHead
Jan 2, 2004
My hope for election day is that the Swiss police turn up and arrest everyone who voted and then burn the FIFA building to the ground.
I can't see another positive outcome.

Shoren
Apr 6, 2011

victoria concordia crescit

PlantHead posted:

My hope for election day is that the Swiss police turn up and arrest everyone who voted and then burn the FIFA building to the ground.
I can't see another positive outcome.

What other opportunity will they have to get all those corrupt scumbags in the same room? That's a law enforcement wet dream right there.

Sky Shadowing
Feb 13, 2012

At least we're not the Thalmor (yet)
If I were the Swiss police, even if they're not going to arrest anyone (which would be loving hilarious if they just raided the place mid-election), I'd just have a significant and obvious presence outside. That way when every single one of the corrupt fucks arrive, they'll take one look, assume that the Swiss ARE about to raid the election or arrest you on your way in, and most of them will say 'oh gently caress THIS' and run off.

Then the only folks who are left will be the ones who actually have nothing to fear, or the ones who just don't give a gently caress.

Bogan Krkic
Oct 31, 2010

Swedish style? No.
Yugoslavian style? Of course not.
It has to be Zlatan-style.

Sky Shadowing posted:

the ones who just don't give a gently caress.

So, all of them?

Shrapnig
Jan 21, 2005

Sexwale has beached himself.

Healbot
Jul 7, 2006

very very very fucjable
very vywr very


Montserrat as FIFA member has neither domestic league nor football club and gets the same vote as Germany.

ukle
Nov 28, 2005

Shrapnig posted:

Sexwale has beached himself.

The dream is over.

jyrka
Jan 21, 2005


Potato Count: 2 small potatoes

Healbot posted:

Montserrat as FIFA member has neither domestic league nor football club and gets the same vote as Germany.

I agree. FIFA should be ran as an efficient Western organisation. The Caribbean, Africa and Asia need to take the back-seat(if a seat at all.)

jyrka
Jan 21, 2005


Potato Count: 2 small potatoes
Wow. Just found out "Prince Ali" and "Sheikh" are two different people. Wild.

ukle
Nov 28, 2005

jyrka posted:

I agree. FIFA should be ran as an efficient Western organisation. The Caribbean, Africa and Asia need to take the back-seat(if a seat at all.)

It needs to be run as a 2 tier organisation like the UN, where there is a main council of the key nations who have all the powers, and another body of all nations who has sod all powers yet gives the nations a presence.

Hegay
Jun 29, 2012

jyrka posted:

I agree. FIFA should be ran as an efficient Western organisation. The Caribbean, Africa and Asia need to take the back-seat(if a seat at all.)

Unironically this. Instead we get some Arab oil Prince who oversaw the murder of footballers in his nation

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Hegay
Jun 29, 2012

Assign voting weigh based on the fifa country coefficient. The best football nations should have more to say and might make friendlies marginally more interesting

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