RE: A ticket came in: Did they take the printer into the shitters with them?

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > RE: A ticket came in: Did they take the printer into the shitters with them?

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Ghostlight: Sep 25, 2009; maybe for one second you can pause; try to step into another person's perspective, and understand that a watermelon is cursing me

"Nothing happened, it just stopped working."

# ? Mar 11, 2016 09:41

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# ? Jun 3, 2024 20:33

seadweller: Mar 30, 2010

Crowley posted:

It's time for.. GUESS WHAT HAPPENED

This time our tech had taken the machine apart before I got there.

What we're looking at is a daughterboard from a Dell laptop. Luckily this was the only damaged part in the machine, but still.. what happened?

Electric screwdriver with no torque control and a big technician pushing down on what they misidentified as a screw? Then either the board just bent down under the weight or the screwdriver slipped and scored / fractured the surface of the PCB?

# ? Mar 11, 2016 10:13

Crowley: Mar 13, 2003

seadweller posted:

Electric screwdriver with no torque control and a big technician pushing down on what they misidentified as a screw? Then either the board just bent down under the weight or the screwdriver slipped and scored / fractured the surface of the PCB?

Maybe it would be nice if I posted this slightly larger image.
(It's amazing what a decent cellphone camera can do)

# ? Mar 11, 2016 10:21

Neddy Seagoon: Oct 12, 2012; "Hi Everybody!"

Did they somehow put power through that port? :stare:

# ? Mar 11, 2016 10:28

TITTIEKISSER69: Mar 19, 2005; SAVE THE BEES
PLANT MORE TREES
CLEAN THE SEAS
KISS TITTIESS

Spilled water on their laptop?

# ? Mar 11, 2016 10:31

seadweller: Mar 30, 2010

Bad capacitor gone pop? I'm almost scared to ask what the red stuff is from L6 to L8?

# ? Mar 11, 2016 10:47

Dr. Arbitrary: Mar 15, 2006; Bleak Gremlin

seadweller posted:

Bad capacitor gone pop? I'm almost scared to ask what the red stuff is from L6 to L8?

Blood sacrifice.
That's a normal part of electronics repair.

# ? Mar 11, 2016 10:51

Frobbe: Jan 19, 2007; Calm Down

Crowley posted:

Maybe it would be nice if I posted this slightly larger image.
(It's amazing what a decent cellphone camera can do)

i'm gonna go with power over ethernet for 500$, bob.

# ? Mar 11, 2016 10:57

DigitalRaven: Oct 9, 2012

seadweller posted:

Bad capacitor gone pop? I'm almost scared to ask what the red stuff is from L6 to L8?

Yeah, I've got :10bux:

on it being from the era of Dells using knockoff caps that would explode when they got bored.

# ? Mar 11, 2016 11:17

Rorac: Aug 19, 2011

DigitalRaven posted:

Yeah, I've got on it being from the era of Dells using knockoff caps that would explode when they got bored.

Agreed, that looks like some type of acid/corrosion damage.

# ? Mar 11, 2016 12:25

Crowley: Mar 13, 2003

Wilford Cutlery posted:

Spilled water on their laptop?

Close enough to win.

It was soup

# ? Mar 11, 2016 12:46

Jewel: May 2, 2009

Crowley posted:

Close enough to win.

It was soup

I spilt soup on my laptop once :shobon:

Not enough to break it though.

# ? Mar 11, 2016 12:48

Potato Salad: Oct 23, 2014; nobody cares

How was soup conductive long enough (aka not boiled away) to melt and blister the PCB that badly? Unless that isn't melting but just ooey-gooey soup that looks like scorched fiberglass and resin?

# ? Mar 11, 2016 15:08

RFC2324: Jun 7, 2012; http 418

Potato Salad posted:

Unless that isn't melting but just ooey-gooey soup that looks like scorched fiberglass and resin?

Hey, don't talk poo poo about my cooking like that!

# ? Mar 11, 2016 15:09

Kyrosiris: May 24, 2006; You try to be happy when everyone is summoning you everywhere to "be their friend".

A ticket update came in.

"I WANT MANAGER TO TELL ME HOW <Kyrosiris> THINK HE HAVE RIGHT TO DISABLE IP JUST BECAUSE DO NOT ANSWER TICKET"

I'm this tempted to just drop links to our TOS and Abuse policy.

# ? Mar 11, 2016 16:51

Raerlynn: Oct 28, 2007; Sorry I'm late, I'm afraid I got lost on the path of life.

Kyrosiris posted:

A ticket update came in.

"I WANT MANAGER TO TELL ME HOW <Kyrosiris> THINK HE HAVE RIGHT TO DISABLE IP JUST BECAUSE DO NOT ANSWER TICKET"

I'm this tempted to just drop links to our TOS and Abuse policy.

Done that with my manager's blessing before. The sputtering that followed was absolutely magical.

# ? Mar 11, 2016 16:55

SeaborneClink: Aug 27, 2010; MAWP... MAWP!

Kyrosiris posted:

A ticket update came in.

"I WANT MANAGER TO TELL ME HOW <Kyrosiris> THINK HE HAVE RIGHT TO DISABLE IP JUST BECAUSE DO NOT ANSWER TICKET"

I'm this tempted to just drop links to our TOS and Abuse policy.

Are you the guy that works in hosting?

# ? Mar 11, 2016 17:02

ConfusedUs: Feb 24, 2004; Bees?
You want fucking bees?
Here you go!
ROLL INITIATIVE!!

A ticket came in.

A customer from the EU started tracerouting their network traffic and looking up registration info for the IP addresses used by my product. Our service routes through the Google cloud, and every Google IP in the entire world is registered to Google HQ in mountain view, CA.

Unware of how IP registration works, they immediately emailed this huge aggressive demanding letter and CC'd the entire company (including the CEO, Legal, and god knows how many other crazy things) wanting to know why their data is leaving the EU. They'll SUE! THEY WILL SUE SO HARD.

Explaining that any IP on any server anywhere in the world could be registered at any other location has not dissuaded them. Links to our TOS haven't stopped them.

So we went to the laws of physics. It is literally impossible for you to ping a sever in California from the EU in 4ms. That's faster than the speed of light.

The rage in the followup email is a sight to behold. Apparently they think we've invented a way to communicate faster than light.

BRB pouring every dime I can beg, borrow or steal into stock in my company, because we're going to revolutionize communications via FTL comms.

# ? Mar 11, 2016 17:02

Kyrosiris: May 24, 2006; You try to be happy when everyone is summoning you everywhere to "be their friend".

SeaborneClink posted:

Are you the guy that works in hosting?

I don't think I'm the only one by a long shot, but yeah.

# ? Mar 11, 2016 17:02

Crowley: Mar 13, 2003

ConfusedUs posted:

BRB pouring every dime I can beg, borrow or steal into stock in my company, because we're going to revolutionize communications via FTL comms.

But FPS gamers will still complain about ping times.

# ? Mar 11, 2016 17:13

Kashuno: Oct 9, 2012; Where the hell is my SWORD?; Grimey Drawer

So we have a couple machines that were running win7pro, non-domain joined computers. I had asked why they weren't part of the domain before and not managed by us, but I'd been told to not worry about it. I'm guessing someone was just clicking through things, because today they are running win10 and aren't really functional. woo.

# ? Mar 11, 2016 17:31

Rooted Vegetable: Jun 1, 2002

ConfusedUs posted:

So we went to the laws of physics. It is literally impossible for you to ping a sever in California from the EU in 4ms. That's faster than the speed of light.

Speed of light is 299792458 metres/second.

Distance between London and SF is 8611000 metres

299792458 / 8611000 = 0.02872320423751287298895291088344 or ~~287.2~~ 28.72 milliseconds.

I've learned something today that will be handy in future.

EDIT: 28.72 milliseconds, thanks ShadeOfBlue

Rooted Vegetable fucked around with this message at 18:07 on Mar 11, 2016

# ? Mar 11, 2016 17:31

ChubbyThePhat: Dec 22, 2006; Who nico nico needs anyone else

Crowley posted:

But FPS gamers will still complain about ping times.

This delay is too drat much.

# ? Mar 11, 2016 17:32

vanity slug: Jul 20, 2010

ChubbyThePhat posted:

This delay is too drat much.

Just overclock your USB port.

# ? Mar 11, 2016 17:35

ShadeofBlue: Mar 17, 2011

Heners_UK posted:

Speed of light is 299792458 metres/second.

Distance between London and SF is 86110000 metres

299792458 / 86110000 = 0.02872320423751287298895291088344 or 287.2 milliseconds.

I've learned something today that will be handy in future.

28.7 ms, you missed a factor of 10 when you converted from seconds

# ? Mar 11, 2016 17:39

totalnewbie: Nov 13, 2005; I was born and raised in China, lived in Japan, and now hold a US passport.

I am wrong in every way, all the damn time.

Ask me about my tattoos.

ShadeofBlue posted:

28.7 ms, you missed a factor of 10 when you converted from seconds .

It's about 40ms in fiber.

# ? Mar 11, 2016 17:41

Siochain: May 24, 2005; "can they get rid of any humans who are fans of shitheads like Kanye West, 50 Cent, or any other piece of crap "artist" who thinks they're all that?

And also get rid of anyone who has posted retarded shit on the internet."

ShadeofBlue posted:

28.7 ms, you missed a factor of 10 when you converted from seconds .

Thank you. I'm sitting here thinking "That seems too high", but its a Friday and my brain isn't working.

# ? Mar 11, 2016 17:42

Dr. Arbitrary: Mar 15, 2006; Bleak Gremlin

ConfusedUs posted:

BRB pouring every dime I can beg, borrow or steal into stock in my company, because we're going to revolutionize communications via FTL comms.

This will be helpful to your company:

https://tools.ietf.org/html/rfc6921

# ? Mar 11, 2016 18:42

Potato Salad: Oct 23, 2014; nobody cares

I saw the "spinning in X's grave" FTL communications proposal again recently, this time from one of our users.

The notion is that you can, say, have two men kiss in NYC and, in the hills of California, Ronald Regan's body starts rolling in his grave in response to those "sick unfortunates." If a corpse spins in a manner dependent upon the in intensity or other factors in the detestable action taking place, you can absolutely modulate a signal through to the destination.

The protocol can include multi-channel functionality. A two-channel link may involve two men kissing and, say, placing a train car on a forklift and repeatedly dipping it onto a pile of thyme. Mussolini's body would have to be moved from Emilia to California, but you get the idea.

One drawback is the need to reduce noise for a channel to function. Teabagging a pile of herbs with a locomotive may be unique enough, but there may be problems with the first proposal, particularly here on SA.

# ? Mar 11, 2016 18:45

Zamboni Apocalypse: Dec 29, 2009

Potato Salad posted:

Teabagging a pile of herbs with a locomotive may be unique enough

Your ideas are intriguing to me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

# ? Mar 11, 2016 19:25

A Frosty Witch: Apr 21, 2005; I was just looking at it and I suddenly got this urge to get inside. No, not just an urge - more than that. It was my destiny to be here; in the box.

Potato Salad posted:

wat

wat

# ? Mar 11, 2016 19:25

Dr. Arbitrary: Mar 15, 2006; Bleak Gremlin

larchesdanrew posted:

wat

There's a lot of bad things you could say about Mussolini, but he made the trains run on time.

# ? Mar 11, 2016 19:27

Malachite_Dragon: Mar 31, 2010; Weaving Merry Christmas magic

Sonuvabitch. That pun physically hurt.

# ? Mar 11, 2016 19:45

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Potato Salad posted:

Some peak William S. Burroughs

# ? Mar 11, 2016 19:45

Apex Rogers: Jun 12, 2006; disturbingly functional

Heners_UK posted:

Speed of light is 299792458 metres/second.

Distance between London and SF is 8611000 metres

299792458 / 8611000 = 0.02872320423751287298895291088344 or ~~287.2~~ 28.72 milliseconds.

I've learned something today that will be handy in future.

EDIT: 28.72 milliseconds, thanks ShadeOfBlue

Uh.. might want to triple-check that math. The answer is right, but you got there all wrong.

8611000 (m) / 299792458 (m/s) = 0.02872 s
0.02872 s = 28.72 milliseconds.

Google calculator

# ? Mar 11, 2016 19:57