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  • Locked thread
Tricky Dick Nixon
Jul 26, 2010

by Nyc_Tattoo

Quorum posted:

1. Free-Masonry is something for men too effeminate and boring to go hunting, the only manly way to spend time and bond
2. If the Pope thinks his nice hat lets him tell me what to do, I have a Stetson that tells him he's wrong
3. We will invade the hollow earth and turn it into a national park

Sorry to burst your bubble but TR was a Freemason.

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Quorum
Sep 24, 2014

REMIND ME AGAIN HOW THE LITTLE HORSE-SHAPED ONES MOVE?

Tricky Dick Nixon posted:

Sorry to burst your bubble but TR was a Freemason.

:monocle: This will never do, elect a zombie Federalist instead!

foobardog
Apr 19, 2007

There, now I can tell when you're posting.

-- A friend :)

QuoProQuid posted:

Thus far, five Presidents have been from New York and three have been elected from Massachusetts. The last time a President we had a President from the South was in 1809, under Charles Cotesworth Pinckney of Virginia.

Let be known and clear, gently caress The South.

Goatse James Bond
Mar 28, 2010

If you see me posting please remind me that I have Charlie Work in the reports forum to do instead
A bit late to sway the vote, but General Winfield Scott, Pompous rear end in a top hat Father Of The Modern American Army, is goddamn fantastic and will receive an effortpost in the next day or two.

He is also a very reasonable man on the Native Americans (did his best to follow his orders as humanely as possible) and slavery.

As befits a genius who stands above lesser men and also is noticeably more spherical.

Baku
Aug 20, 2005

by Fluffdaddy

GreyjoyBastard posted:

A bit late to sway the vote, but General Winfield Scott, Pompous rear end in a top hat Father Of The Modern American Army, is goddamn fantastic and will receive an effortpost in the next day or two.

Look, there's nothing you can say at this point to change my mind: the right man for the job is the corpse of Daniel Webster.

QuoProQuid
Jan 12, 2012

Tr*ckin' and F*ckin' all the way to tha
T O P

Zombies' Downfall posted:

Look, there's nothing you can say at this point to change my mind: the right man for the job is the corpse of Daniel Webster.

Voting Daniel Webster will probably cause a Freemason, anti-abolitionist Southerner to be elected by the Electoral College.

Thump!
Nov 25, 2007

Look, fat, here's the fact, Kulak!



QuoProQuid posted:

Voting Daniel Webster will probably cause a Freemason, anti-abolitionist Southerner to be elected by the Electoral College.

Huh, so we inadvertently caused the North to secede instead? Neat!

Goatse James Bond
Mar 28, 2010

If you see me posting please remind me that I have Charlie Work in the reports forum to do instead

Zombies' Downfall posted:

Look, there's nothing you can say at this point to change my mind: the right man for the job is the corpse of Daniel Webster.

Pre-corpse Webster endorsed Scott over his own then-live candidacy. We should respect his last official position on the subject and elect a stubborn, obnoxious curmudgeon to chart a reasonable, sensible path to enlightenment and prosperity and browbeat everyone who is not reasonable or sensible.

We already elected a stubborn obnoxious curmudgeon in John Adams Pbuh. We need more.

karmicknight
Aug 21, 2011

Thump! posted:

Huh, so we inadvertently caused the North to secede instead? Neat!

It'd be a nice change of pace, yes.

Jump King
Aug 10, 2011

I voted for the south just so that could happen!

Thump!
Nov 25, 2007

Look, fat, here's the fact, Kulak!



karmicknight posted:

It'd be a nice change of pace, yes.

The Union of American States has a long, glorious road of subjugating and devastating the racist, fractured United States south of the Mason-Dixon Line :laugh:

Nebakenezzer
Sep 13, 2005

The Mote in God's Eye

GreyjoyBastard posted:

A bit late to sway the vote, but General Winfield Scott, Pompous rear end in a top hat Father Of The Modern American Army, is goddamn fantastic and will receive an effortpost in the next day or two.

He is also a very reasonable man on the Native Americans (did his best to follow his orders as humanely as possible) and slavery.

As befits a genius who stands above lesser men and also is noticeably more spherical.

Cool. Looking forward to this.

Corek
May 11, 2013

by R. Guyovich
Winfield Scott lived so long that he began to serve with people named after him (Winfield Scott Hancock) already by the Mexican-American War.

QuoProQuid
Jan 12, 2012

Tr*ckin' and F*ckin' all the way to tha
T O P

Thank you for voting. We apologize for the delay. With only about a third of the popular vote, John P. Hale of the Free Soil Party has been elected President of these United States. Though he must still travel to Washington to be sworn in, Hale has already assembled a “Kitchen Cabinet” composed of prominent abolitionists, including Martin Van Buren, William Lloyd Garrison, and Calvin Fairbank, to discuss reconstruction of the rump United States and reintegration of freed slaves.

The Vice President-elect George Washington Julian will be visiting major cities across the country to find a new, more defensible, location for the United States capitol.

MOST POPULAR TICKET:

John P. Hale / George Washington Julian (Free Soil) - 35 votes (38%)
Daniel Webster / Charles J. Jenkins (Union) - 19 votes (20.7%)
Winfield Scott / William Alexander Graham (Whig) - 19 votes (20.7%)
George Troup / John A . Quitman (Southern Rights) - 10 votes (10.9%)
Jacob Broom / Reynell Coates (Native American) - 6 votes (6.5%)
Franklin Pierce / William R. King (Democratic) - 3 votes (3.3%)
TOTAL: 92 votes

QuoProQuid
Jan 12, 2012

Tr*ckin' and F*ckin' all the way to tha
T O P

ELECTION OF 1856

:siren: Click here to vote in the Election of 1856! :siren:



Background:

The United States is collapsing, taking with it decades of political compromise and avoidance on the issue of slavery. Political pillage and murder has become commonplace within the territories. Just a week before the Democrat’s Cincinnati Convention, a congressman from South Carolina beat his colleague from Massachusetts to near-death. A fanatical abolitionist named John Brown has led an attempted slave revolt in Kansas, hacking pro-slavery leaders to death with an axe. The press takes turns praising abolitionism and condemning it. The Whig Party has virtually vanished, leaving two new and inexperienced parties to fill the void.

And few remember that this collapse was brought to the forefront by a railroad.

In 1854, officials from both North and South came together in support of a trans-continental railroad to California. Once debates over the issue began in earnest, however, sectional tensions began to emerge. Southerners lobbied for the rail line to take a southern route while Northerners pushed for a Northern route that might link St. Louis, Missouri, Chicago, Baltimore, Philadelphia, and New York. James Gadsden, Pierce’s Ambassador to Mexico, negotiated the purchase of Mexican lands in what is now the southern border of Arizona and New Mexico on December 30, 1853 to assure sufficient rights-of-way through less mountainous terrain. Meanwhile, the North began clearing land in the Nebraska Territory to facilitate their route.

However, rival factions within Missouri wanted control of the route and the potential fortunes to be made from land speculation. Pro-slave forces threatened to block any efforts to organize Nebraska because Missouri would then be surrounded on its west, east, and north by free states. Fearing that it might be forced to abolish slavery, Missouri lobbied the South for support.

The support emerged in the form of the Kansas-Nebraska Act. Introduced in January 1854, the act repealed the Missouri Compromise and opened all territories to slavery by devolving control over slavery to the individual states and territories. While popular in the South, because it essentially re-enshrined protections for slavery, the Act became wildly unpopular in the North. George Washington Julian, a former candidate for the Free Soil Party, condemned Congress and commented that: “The whole issue of slavery [is] thus reopened.” Outraged at their own party’s actions, Northern Democrats have started abandoning the Democratic Party en masse, led by Ohio Senator Salmon Chase.

These dissenters found sympathetic supporters among “Free Soil” activists and “Conscience Whigs.” Working together, these factions began holding anti-Nebraska townhalls across the country, meetings which eventually led to the formation of a new party: The Republican Party. Committed to stopping the expansion of slavery, the Republicans are seen by abolitionists as the country’s best chance to abolish slavery. Meanwhile, Southerners are warning that if a Republican is ever elected to major office, that it will bring about immediate secession and Civil War.

Meanwhile, another party, the secretive, nativist party, known as the Know-Nothings is gaining speed. Hoping to unite the country around an issue other than slavery, the Know-Nothings promise stringent restrictions on Catholic immigration. They have nominated former President Millard Fillmore in hopes of attracting supporters from both the North and South.

DEMOCRATIC PARTY NOMINEES:


Presidential Nominee: James Buchanan, Jr.
  • Party Affiliation: Democratic Party
  • Home State: Pennsylvania
  • Notable Positions: United States Ambassador to the United Kingdom, United States Secretary of State, United States Senator from Pennsylvania, United States Ambassador to Russia, United States Representative from Pennsylvania
  • Biography: The son of wealthy Irish immigrants, James Buchanan enjoyed a happy childhood that allowed him to attend good schools, graduate with honors, and start a successful legal career. Buchanan began his political career within Pennsylvania state politics as a dedicated Federalist. From 1821 to 1831, Buchanan made a name for himself within Congress as a constitutional expert and later served on the House Judiciary Committee where he promoted Federalist causes like internal improvement projects and the National Bank. After a failed love affair with Ann Caroline Coleman, Buchanan sought refuge in political office and allowed ambition to guide his future. During the 1830s, Buchanan left the Federalists for the Democrats. He became a major figure within the northern wing of the Democratic party, serving prominent positions under Jackson and Polk, and was a potential presidential nominee in the last three elections.
  • Platform: After the Kansas-Nebraska Act poisoned the political futures of Franklin Pierce and Stephen Douglas, James Buchanan was left as the only serious contender to the Democratic Party nomination. Hailing from Congress, with extensive diplomatic experience, Buchanan seemed to offer the Democrats a rare opportunity: A dull conservative who had not been tainted by the slavery debate, but whose actions were still predictable. Unlike Zachary Taylor and Winfield Scott, “Old Buck” could be controlled.

    Though the election remains very personality-centric, with Buchanan attacking Frémont as a bastard and defending himself against allegations about his age, bachelorhood, and history of depression, slavery dominates the campaign. Buchanan has adopted the doctrine of “popular sovereignty,” a principle which argues that every state and territory should decide on the future of slavery within its borders. He argues that popular sovereignty is the only way to bridge the growing chasm between North and South and has implied that the election of a Republican would cause a civil war. Buchanan is also the suspected author of the Ostend Manifesto, a document urging the United States to either purchase or seize Cuba from Spain. Buchanan considers himself a moderate, opposed to absolutes on both sides. He condemns both free trade and protective tariffs, moderate internal improvements, an independent Treasury, and detests both extremes on the slavery debate. He is unwilling to outlaw abolitionist societies but at the same time considers them responsible for the “postpone[ment of] emancipation in three or four states for at least half a century.” He is a strong believer in public education, but considers it a matter for the states to fund. He is an active Freemason.


Vice Presidential Nominee: John C. Breckenridge
  • Party Affiliation: Democratic Party
  • Home State: Kentucky
  • Notable Positions: United States Senator from Kentucky, United States Representative from Kentucky
  • Biography: Breckenridge is the descendent of an old Kentucky political family and imbued with immense political and personal wealth. An attorney with ambitions for high office, Breckenridge began his political career in 1849 in state politics where he distinguished himself as a loyal and incorruptible Democrat. Using his local ties, Breckenridge then ran and won office as a Representative of Kentucky’s 8th district. As the United States hurtles towards Civil War, Breckenridge has appeared as an attractive Southerner, devoted to preserving slavery but equally committed to the Union. He is running in 1856 to balance the Democratic ticket on regional lines. If elected, he would be the youngest vice president in American history, being only 36 years old.
  • Platform: At the Democratic National Convention in Cincinnati, Breckenridge supported Franklin Pierce for his work in supporting the South. When Pierce failed to achieve a majority of votes, Breckenridge supported Stephen Douglas for authoring the Kansas-Nebraska Act. When Douglas, too, failed, James Buchanan seemed the only logical choice. As a Northerner, however, the Southern Democrats would only need a Southerner to stand on the ticket as well. Enter, Breckenridge. A devoted Southerner, committed to the preservation and expansion of ticket, Breckenridge is the perfect candidate to address the fears of the planter class. He has actively campaigned to boost support for Buchanan and condemn the Republicans. He has told Americans that the Republicans are not to be trusted, for they are fanatically devoted to emancipation, and that they would destroy the Union to end slavery.

    Breckenridge is considered a moderate within his party. Instead of justifying slavery as a moral good, he considers it a constitutional issue. Slaves, as articulated within the Constitution, are property and the federal government is not empowered to interfere with property rights. He opposed the Wilmot Proviso, which would have forbidden slavery in any United States territory, and declares slavery a “wholly local and domestic” matter. Breckenridge opposes protective tariffs but supports federal funding of internal improvements so long as they are not applied in a discriminatory manner and instead lead to improvements “of a national character.” He favors westward expansion but is uniquely isolationist, declaring that America should not interfere with the internal politics of other countries. He is an active Freemason.

REPUBLICAN PARTY NOMINEES:


Presidential Nominee: John C. Frémont
  • Party Affiliation: Republican Party
  • Home State: California
  • Notable Positions: United States Senator from California, United States Military Governor of California (disputed)
  • Biography: John C. Frémont is a military officer, explorer, and mapmaker who was instrumental in westward expansion and the development of California. The son of a French émigré, Frémont grew up in Charleston, South Carolina, where he demonstrated an aptitutde for mathematics and attended the College of Charleston. Because of family connections, Frémont secured a position as a teacher of mathematics aboard the U.S. warship Natchez, which cruised along the South American coast for two and a half years. Upon returning, he served as a railroad engineer, an assistant to French scientist Joseph Nicolas Nicollet, an explorer of the Upper Mississippi and Missouri Rivers, and a surveyor on various land projects. In 1842, he travelled to Oregon to assist with American immigration to the West Coast and, eventually, led a group of American settlers to overthrow the Mexican government in California and establish the Bear Star Republic. Though he is widely known across the country, Frémont remains a political outsider. He has served only a few small elected positions and his positions on non-slavery related issues are something of a mystery.
  • Platform: When the Kansas-Nebraska Act was passed in 1854, it galvanized abolitionists in the North and gave the Republican Party the political space it needed to thrive. A loose coalition of reform-minded politicians, the Republican Party formed in 1854 to oppose the Kansas-Nebraska Act and slavery more broadly. At their first Presidential Convention in Philadelphia, the new Republican Party adopted a platform opposing the extension of slavery into the territories and supporting John C. Fremont of California for the Presidency.

    Though he has had to fight off attacks from the Democrats about his illegitimate birth and rumors that he might be Catholic, Frémont has tried to refocus public attention on the issue of slavery. As articulated in the Republican Party platform, Frémont is opposed to slavery in any existing territories and supports a repeal of the Kansas-Nebraska Act, which might potentially allow slavery to expand northward. He opposes nativist restrictions on immigration and the Ostend Manifesto, which calls for the United States to annex Cuba. Frémont has urged the country to get its own house in order before it tries to annex further territory. He supports a railroad project linking the East Coast with the West Coast, so long as it travels through the North and not the South. His stances on other issues are unclear, a fact which the Democrats have exploited by inflaming rumors that Frémont supports temperance, feminism, socialism, free love, and Catholicism.


Vice Presidential Nominee: William L. Dayton
  • Party Affiliation: Republican Party
  • Home State: New Jersey
  • Notable Positions: United States Senator from New Jersey, New Jersey Legislative Councilman
  • Biography: William Dayton is a distant relative of former House Speaker Jonathan Dayton. Born in Somerset County, New Jersey, he graduated from college in September 1825 and was admitted to the bar in 1830. Because of his reputation as a lawyer, an opponent described Dayton by saying that he “tried his first case as well as I did my last,” Dayton was elected to the New Jersey Legislative Council and later became a judge on the New Jersey Supreme Court. His easy-going and personable reputation led to his appointment to the United States Senate in 1842, where he supported efforts to stop the expansion of slavery. Despite his radical views, Dayton is well-liked both in his native New Jersey and within the United States Senate. He is considered unusually “Christian,” and is known to “scorn all indiscretions.”
  • Platform: Dayton is a former Whig and a true believer of the Republican Party. An adamant proponent of abolition, Dayton has spent his career trying to halt the expansion of slavery and force the South to commit to real reforms to end its peculiar institution. He supports a repeal of the Kansas-Nebraska Act. On all other affairs, Dayton is a traditional Whig. He supports strengthening the independent Treasury, enacting protective tariffs to protect American industry, and robust internal improvement projects. He does not support further expansion and sees the Ostend Manifesto as a Southern attempt to increase its power.

AMERICAN/ WHIG PARTY NOMINEES:


Presidential Nominee: Millard Fillmore
  • Party Affiliation: Whig Party
  • Home State: New York
  • Notable Positions: President of the United States, Vice President of the United States, Comptroller of New York, Chancellor of the University of Buffalo, United States Representative from New York
  • Biography: Millard Fillmore was born the second of eight children to two deeply impoverished farmers. Unable to support his children, Fillmore’s father apprenticed Millard to a clothmaker where he effectively worked as a slave until he was able to steal enough money to buy his freedom. Deeply fascinated by books and education, Fillmore fell in love with his former teacher, Abigail Powers, and was able to self-teach himself law. In 1828, Fillmore gained his first experience with politics by joining the Anti-Masonic Party, where he distinguished himself as a rising star within the movement and a fervent Anti-Jacksonian. Following the death of Zachary Taylor, Fillmore served as an important but unpopular broker between Northern and Southern forces.
  • Platform: It is not really clear why Millard Fillmore has been selected as the nominee of the American Party, an organization that seeks to halt Catholic immigration and promote American values. Though Fillmore gave lip-service to nativist ideas during the Election of 1848 and his Presidency, he has neither sought the American Party nomination, nor does he identify with it politically. In fact, his daughter attended a Catholic boarding school and he helped fund the construction of a Catholic cathedral in New York. It is unclear whether Fillmore is fully cognizant of the significance of his nomination, as he has been outside the country for the last several months. Fillmore’s isolated letters claim that he is interested in forming a “truly national party, which shall ignore this constant and distracting agitation of slavery.”

    A Northerner but formerly an ally of Henry Clay, Fillmore has ensured the passage of palatable compromises on the slavery issue. He believes that abolitionism is a well-intentioned but radical movement that would tear apart the Union and that the Wilmot Proviso would lead to Civil War. Fillmore opposes the much more anti-slavery William Seward and was put on the ticket partially to block Taylor should he try to appoint him to the Cabinet. He personally opposes the Fugitive Slave Law but believes that it must be protected to appease the South. He has been indecisive on the annexation of Cuba. In other foreign affairs, Fillmore is known to be deeply interested in Asia and the Pacific. He personally hopes to open trade with China and Japan. Fillmore has adopted the same jingoistic pro-revolutionary stance as many of his predecessors and believes that the United States should support democratic revolutions abroad. Fillmore supports the independent Treasury system and Clay’s American System. He believes in the need to support internal improvements and protective tariffs. He deeply opposes Freemasonry and believes that all secret societies should be outlawed.


Vice Presidential Nominee: Andrew Jackson Donelson
  • Party Affiliation: American Party
  • Home State: Tennessee
  • Notable Positions: United States Ambassador to Prussia, United States Ambassador to Texas
  • Biography: Andrew Jackson Donelson has had a long career thanks to his namesake and uncle, Andrew Jackson. Born in Nashville, Tennessee, Donelson attended Cumberland College and graduated from the United States Military Academy before spending two years as Andrew Jackson’s aide-de-camp. From this position, Donelson learned the trade of politics and was eventually selected to serve as Jackson’s private secretary in Washington. Following Jackson’s departure from office, Donelson found himself thrust into various positions as elites tried to appease his famous relative. In 1844, John Tyler appointed him Ambassador to Texas, where he was responsible for negotiating the terms of annexation. Following his mission’s success, he became a respected elder within the Democratic Party. Under Pierce, Donelson was appointed to serve as the Ambassador to Prussia, a position which he served competently, before retiring. Donelson has joined the American Party because he sees it as the next big political movement and hopes that it will fill the void left by the Whigs.
  • Platform: Donelson is a Unionist above all else; a man who fears that the country will be torn apart if it cannot find an issue other than slavery to focus upon. Though it is unclear whether he supports the American Party’s nativist platform, which includes stringent limitations on Catholic immigration, strengthening naturalization laws, and enforcing Protestantism, he does feel that the American Party is the only organization that can claim to be a truly national party, being appealing to both Northerners and Southerners instead of just one part of the nation. Despite this rhetoric, Donelson is a Democrat at heart. He believes in free trade, minimal internal improvements, and a weak Treasury. He supports slavery but is willing to sacrifice the institution if it means upholding the Union.

QuoProQuid has issued a correction as of 22:47 on Mar 13, 2016

CuwiKhons
Sep 24, 2009

Seven idiots and a bear walk into a dragon's lair.

QuoProQuid posted:

His stances on other issues are unclear, a fact which the Democrats have exploited by inflaming rumors that Frémont supports temperance, feminism, socialism, free love, and Catholicism.

Godspeed man :patriot:

Ibogaine
Aug 11, 2015
These new fangled so called "Republicans" don't look like they will be around for long, so I might just vote for them before their inevitable disappearance!

Fremont/Dayton 56!

i say swears online
Mar 4, 2005

so what's our biggest landslide so far because this one's in the bag

karmicknight
Aug 21, 2011
Free Soil, Free Labor, Free Speech, Free Men, Fremont

QuoProQuid
Jan 12, 2012

Tr*ckin' and F*ckin' all the way to tha
T O P

Aliquid posted:

so what's our biggest landslide so far because this one's in the bag

DeWitt Clinton won over 80% of the vote in the 1820 election against James Monroe. We'll see if Fremont can beat that margin, but I expect a landslide.

Ibogaine posted:

These new fangled so called "Republicans" don't look like they will be around for long, so I might just vote for them before their inevitable disappearance!

Fremont/Dayton 56!

I am very happy with the timing of this election with the Republican Party's real-world problems.

Thump!
Nov 25, 2007

Look, fat, here's the fact, Kulak!



This Grand Old Party will be a stalwart defender of the liberties of free men everywhere, and will enfranchise and empower the blacks of America and will, through our French leader Fremont, Make America Great Again!

Lycus
Aug 5, 2008

Half the posters in this forum have been made up. This website is a goddamn ghost town.

quote:

Frémont supports ... feminism, socialism, free love

Voted.

Ibogaine
Aug 11, 2015

QuoProQuid posted:

I am very happy with the timing of this election with the Republican Party's real-world problems.

It does feel weird to join the "Silent Majority" by unironically voting Republican. I find their original, 19th century "Southern Strategy" much more appealing than the 20th century reboot.

QuoProQuid
Jan 12, 2012

Tr*ckin' and F*ckin' all the way to tha
T O P

CuwiKhons posted:

Godspeed man :patriot:




THE GREAT REPUBLICAN REFORM PARTY: CALLING ON THEIR CANDIDATE

TEMPERANCE ADVOCATE: "The first thing we want, is a law making the use of Tobacco, Animal food, and Lager-bier a Capital Crime."

TROUSER-WEARING SUFFRAGETTE: "We demand, first of all; the recognition of Woman as the equal of man with a right to Vote and hold Office."

SOCIALIST VAGRANT: "An equal division of Property that is what I go in for."

LIBERTARIAN SPINSTER: "Col. I wish to invite you to the next meeting of our Free Love association, where the shackles of marriage are not tolerated & perfect freedom exist in love matters and you will be sure to Enjoy yourself, for we are all Freemounters."

PAPIST PRIEST: "We look to you Sir to place the power of the Pope on a firm footing in this Country."

FREEDMAN: "De Poppylation ob Color comes in first. arter dat, you may do wot you pleases."

FOOLISH FREMONT: "You shall all have what you desire. and be sure that the glorious Principles of Popery, Fourierism, Free Love, Woman's Rights, the Maine Law, & above all the Equality of our Colored brethren, shall be maintained; If I get into the Presidential Chair."

Ibogaine
Aug 11, 2015

QuoProQuid posted:

[FREMONT: "You shall all have what you desire. and be sure that the glorious Principles of Popery, Fourierism, Free Love, Woman's Rights, the Maine Law, & above all the Equality of our Colored brethren, shall be maintained; If I get into the Presidential Chair."


Awesome! Finally a platform I can get behind!

Bonus info: my German autocorrect software just wanted to substitute "behind" with "behindert" (retarded). Even I think that that's a bit too harsh a word to describe the GOP. But then again, ze Computer is alvays right!

Franco Potente
Jul 9, 2010
If this party's got foxy libertarian spinsters, it's got my vote. :grin:

Fremont/Dayton in '56.

Vavrek
Mar 2, 2013

I like your style hombre, but this is no laughing matter. Assault on a police officer. Theft of police property. Illegal possession of a firearm. FIVE counts of attempted murder. That comes to... 29 dollars and 40 cents. Cash, cheque, or credit card?

QuoProQuid posted:


[...]
LIBERTARIAN SPINSTER: "Col. I wish to invite you to the next meeting of our Free Love association, where the shackles of marriage are not tolerated & perfect freedom exist in love matters and you will be sure to Enjoy yourself, for we are all Freemounters."

:vince:

I cannot vote for Fremont hard enough.

Jump King
Aug 10, 2011

this election is a wash, next please

SpRahl
Apr 22, 2008
Hey QuoProQuid nothing major but I just thought you should know you have the election labled as 1852 rather than 1856.

Franco Potente posted:

If this party's got foxy libertarian spinsters, it's got my vote. :grin:

Fremont/Dayton in '56.

Yeah its like the opposition is trying to get us to vote Freemont.

Nebakenezzer
Sep 13, 2005

The Mote in God's Eye

QuoProQuid posted:

FOOLISH FREMONT: "You shall all have what you desire. and be sure that the glorious Principles of Popery, Fourierism, Free Love, Woman's Rights, the Maine Law,

NOT THE MARINE LAW!!!!

Empress Theonora
Feb 19, 2001

She was a sword glinting in the depths of night, a lance of light piercing the darkness. There would be no mistakes this time.
Free Soil, Free Labor, Free Speech, Free Men, Fremont, Freemasons. :mason: :mason: :mason:

Alfred P. Pseudonym
May 29, 2006

And when you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss goes 8-8

Voting Fremont for negro papist female supremacy

Maxwells Demon
Jan 15, 2007


Alfred P. Pseudonym posted:

Voting Fremont for negro papist female supremacy

Voting Fremont for more women in trousers with dresses over them

Nckdictator
Sep 8, 2006
Just..someone
Voting for our First Gay President.

And to be a contrarian rear end

QuoProQuid
Jan 12, 2012

Tr*ckin' and F*ckin' all the way to tha
T O P

Nebakenezzer posted:

NOT THE MARINE LAW!!!!

in 1851, Maine prohibited the sale of alcohol, except for "medicinal, mechanical or manufacturing purposes" to combat public drunkenness. The rest of the country thought this was absolutely hilarious.

Maine residents were slightly less amused and in 1855, Portland had rum riots.

cinci zoo sniper
Mar 15, 2013




Fremont/Dayton '56.

Discendo Vox
Mar 21, 2013

We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.
George Washington Julian is the best.

frankenfreak
Feb 16, 2007

I SCORED 85% ON A QUIZ ABOUT MONDAY NIGHT RAW AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY TEXT

#bastionboogerbrigade
Welcome to the Republican Party!

QuoProQuid posted:



THE GREAT REPUBLICAN REFORM PARTY: CALLING ON THEIR CANDIDATE

TEMPERANCE ADVOCATE: "The first thing we want, is a law making the use of Tobacco, Animal food, and Lager-bier a Capital Crime."

TROUSER-WEARING SUFFRAGETTE: "We demand, first of all; the recognition of Woman as the equal of man with a right to Vote and hold Office."

SOCIALIST VAGRANT: "An equal division of Property that is what I go in for."

LIBERTARIAN SPINSTER: "Col. I wish to invite you to the next meeting of our Free Love association, where the shackles of marriage are not tolerated & perfect freedom exist in love matters and you will be sure to Enjoy yourself, for we are all Freemounters."

PAPIST PRIEST: "We look to you Sir to place the power of the Pope on a firm footing in this Country."

FREEDMAN: "De Poppylation ob Color comes in first. arter dat, you may do wot you pleases."

FOOLISH FREMONT: "You shall all have what you desire. and be sure that the glorious Principles of Popery, Fourierism, Free Love, Woman's Rights, the Maine Law, & above all the Equality of our Colored brethren, shall be maintained; If I get into the Presidential Chair."

AGC.

Corek
May 11, 2013

by R. Guyovich
It's hilarious that James Buchanan is the very last ex-Federalist we can vote for.

Empress Theonora posted:

Free Soil, Free Labor, Free Speech, Free Men, Fremont, Freemasons. :mason: :mason: :mason:

Oh, Buchanan and Breckenridge are both active Freemasons too.

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Proposition Joe
Oct 8, 2010

He was a good man
Socialism? Feminism? Abolitionism?

This Republican Party seems real swell, I anticipate it will be a progressive force until the end of time.

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