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Mango Polo
Aug 4, 2007

Pawl posted:

Good news, you can safely google Seraphon now

What was it before? Without any input is say anime furry dragon porn, but I'm curious if the reality is even worse than my imagination.

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Safety Factor
Oct 31, 2009




Grimey Drawer

Mango Polo posted:

What was it before? Without any input is say anime furry dragon porn, but I'm curious if the reality is even worse than my imagination.

It was bizarre furry/scaly tickle fetish stuff. I don't remember any nudity, but it was still pretty goddamn weird.

Broguts
Oct 16, 2014

Pawl posted:

Good news, you can safely google Seraphon now

Well there goes the only fun Age of Sigmar provided me.

Nebalebadingdong
Jun 30, 2005

i made a video game.
why not give it a try!?
Just scroll down a bit. Image #15 is pikachu torture porn

Mystic Mongol
Jan 5, 2007

Your life's been thrown in disarray already--I wouldn't want you to feel pressured.


College Slice

Nebalebadingdong posted:

Just scroll down a bit. Image #15 is pikachu torture porn

Your search results are customized to you, and google tends to provide what it thinks you want.

You sicko.

Nebalebadingdong
Jun 30, 2005

i made a video game.
why not give it a try!?

Mystic Mongol posted:

Your search results are customized to you, and google tends to provide what it thinks you want.

You sicko.

kinky if true :pervert:

Business Gorillas
Mar 11, 2009

:harambe:



spectralent posted:

Fortunately I can see no issues with allowing people to allocate points based on how nice you are when actual stuff is on the line.

One time I got a 0 friendliness score from someone because I called them out on trying to reroll a leadership test 3 times in a row.

Pawl
Sep 9, 2006

I'm seeing this from an AoS perspective.







white primer uber alles

Business Gorillas posted:

empire's definitely done, as are high and dark elves. im pretty sure the new elves AELFS live in the forest so i'm p sure that wood elves are still gonna be ok

gaylord said iirc that eventually all of the old world factions are gonna be thrown out and their new nounverber factions are gonna be their replacement

then again, they've recently seemed like they realized they massively hosed up (ex. asking for FAQ on the 40k facebook, even having a 40k/aos facebook to begin with, putting a points system on AoS, etc), so who knows. i can't imagine how adding new retard factions while chain-squatting crowd favorites like the empire are supposed to help out the game

Empire as a single army might be dead but it looks like they're breaking it up into factions

http://www.belloflostsouls.net/2016/03/gw-grand-alliance-order-spotted.html

10 factions of elves Aelves (tm) probably means they kept (at least most of) the High Elves and Dark Elves, "Fanatical Sigmar devotees" sounds like Empire Flagellants/Warrior Priests, "Free Peoples" sounds like a mix of Brets and Empire common folk and also maybe the Knights, "Wizards & Battlemages" is a faction composed of all the magic stuff, and the faction that brings Dwarves Duardin and Human engineers together is obviously going to be pure war machines. Not sure where the war beasts fit into this.

Also apparently Orcs Orruks are next

JerryLee
Feb 4, 2005

THE RESERVED LIST! THE RESERVED LIST! I CANNOT SHUT UP ABOUT THE RESERVED LIST!

Pawl posted:

"Free Peoples" sounds like people the Sigmarines haven't gotten around to slaughtering yet

fixed that for you

Atlas Hugged
Mar 12, 2007


Put your arms around me,
fiddly digits, itchy britches
I love you all
These sound less like factions and more like unit types.

The Bee
Nov 25, 2012

Making his way to the ring . . .
from Deep in the Jungle . . .

The Big Monkey!

Atlas Hugged posted:

These sound less like factions and more like unit types.

Sort of like how the Sigmarines are all big armor guys. And the Brazzerdwarves are literally all Slayers. I think we're spotting a common denominator among AoS armies.

So the Battlemage faction gets wizards, horse wizards, muscle wizards, bow wizards, and wizard wizards.

JerryLee
Feb 4, 2005

THE RESERVED LIST! THE RESERVED LIST! I CANNOT SHUT UP ABOUT THE RESERVED LIST!
You can have big armor guys with axes, big armor guys with maces, big armor guys shooting a gun, big armor guys on a dragon, big armor guys being held aloft by orbiting sperm globs. I don't know what else you want

MrSlam
Apr 25, 2014

And there you sat, eating hamburgers while the world cried.

The Bee posted:

wizard wizards.

Stay away from those guys, they're super weird

Avenging Dentist
Oct 1, 2005

oh my god is that a circular saw that does not go in my mouth aaaaagh

JerryLee posted:

You can have big armor guys with axes, big armor guys with maces, big armor guys shooting a gun, big armor guys on a dragon, big armor guys being held aloft by orbiting sperm globs. I don't know what else you want

One big armor guy on another big armor guy, please :grin:

Nebalebadingdong
Jun 30, 2005

i made a video game.
why not give it a try!?

The Bee posted:

muscle wizards

AoS we can get behind!

mp5
Jan 1, 2005

Stroke of luck!

JerryLee posted:

I was first in line for the gold-spraypainted ladle but my last round opponent stiffed me on narrative forging points. thanks, rear end in a top hat

you only got the highaelf haelmaet two inches up your butt you dirty casual, we all did at least three. dont bring that weak poo poo to a tourney. minus points

Doctor Borris
May 29, 2014

Sometimes Serious.
Sometimes Satirical.
Never Ever Sarcastic.
Ever.
I was a little suprised but Manfred Von Carstein somehow survived the Apocalypse, and is still named Manfred and is still a Vampire Count. I mean I applaud GW for the absolutely zero amount of effort put into that, considering he's still wearing exactly what he wore when he personally ensured the apocalypse. Who would even bring him back to life, then unlife, anyway? I hesitate to even ask what other characters were literally copy pasted from the Old World and are now (despite it being thousands of generations of years of eons) EXACTLY THE SAME PEOPLE.

IF you want to hear what 2 40k hardcore nerds think of AOS listen to Signals from the Frontline 417. These are guys who run the ITC and have single-handedly organized the biggest 40k convention network on the west coast. They are usually very positive and they listened to an AOS Audiotape they found in the hands of a dead hobo in a alley in Texas.

This Is Their Story
https://www.frontlinegaming.org/2016/03/15/signals-from-the-frontline-episode-417-aos-audio-book/'

Its also a very short story.

Xlorp
Jan 23, 2008


spectralent posted:

Fortunately I can see no issues with allowing people to allocate points based on how nice you are when actual stuff is on the line.
Top score-getters are permitted to leave their models at the table and just go. Their names will be stricken from the Book of Sigmar. Those remaining must stay and purchase more Finecast Objects of Wonder and advance to the next round. The hapless player who is left at the end of day now must write the next version of AoS rules. Pity him, for he bears our misery so that we might awake. For 40k and The Absent Daddy Issues!

Leperflesh
May 17, 2007

MrSlam posted:

Stay away from those guys, they're super weird


Wand of magic wizard
Wizardball
Mordenkainen's Mordenkainen
Wizardish Talisman
Teleport Wizard
Summon Dire Wizards
Dreaded 13th Wizard
Bigby's Bigby
Familiar Wizard
Living Wizard Statue
Flesh to Wizard
Pocket Wizard Tower (With Wizard Inhabitant)
Wizard's Brew
Wizard's Strength
Call Wizard Storm
Cure Moderate Wizard
Speak with Wizards
+3 Vorpal Wizard
Waaaaaaaazard!
Potion of Wizard
The Other Trickster's Wizard
Wizard Standard
Searing Wizard
Wizard Leeching
Purple Wizard
Wizardshield
Wizard of Battle
Wizard Fall

Safety Factor
Oct 31, 2009




Grimey Drawer
Don't forget the snake fuckers from a few pages ago.

Coward
Sep 10, 2009

I say we take off and surrender unconditionally from orbit.

It's the only way to be sure



.

Leperflesh posted:

Wand of magic wizard
Wizardball
Mordenkainen's Mordenkainen
Wizardish Talisman
Teleport Wizard
Summon Dire Wizards
Dreaded 13th Wizard
Bigby's Bigby
Familiar Wizard
Living Wizard Statue
Flesh to Wizard
Pocket Wizard Tower (With Wizard Inhabitant)
Wizard's Brew
Wizard's Strength
Call Wizard Storm
Cure Moderate Wizard
Speak with Wizards
+3 Vorpal Wizard
Waaaaaaaazard!
Potion of Wizard
The Other Trickster's Wizard
Wizard Standard
Searing Wizard
Wizard Leeching
Purple Wizard
Wizardshield
Wizard of Battle
Wizard Fall

Melf's Acid Melf
Tenser's Tenser Tenser
Otto's Irresistible

Macdeo Lurjtux
Jul 5, 2011

BRRREADSTOOORRM!

Leperflesh posted:

Wand of magic wizard
Wizardball
Mordenkainen's Mordenkainen
Wizardish Talisman
Teleport Wizard
Summon Dire Wizards
Dreaded 13th Wizard
Bigby's Bigby
Familiar Wizard
Living Wizard Statue
Flesh to Wizard
Pocket Wizard Tower (With Wizard Inhabitant)
Wizard's Brew
Wizard's Strength
Call Wizard Storm
Cure Moderate Wizard
Speak with Wizards
+3 Vorpal Wizard
Waaaaaaaazard!
Potion of Wizard
The Other Trickster's Wizard
Wizard Standard
Searing Wizard
Wizard Leeching
Purple Wizard
Wizardshield
Wizard of Battle
Wizard Fall

Magic Missal
Tasha's Hideous Uncontrollable Wizard

Macdeo Lurjtux fucked around with this message at 06:39 on Mar 23, 2016

Not a viking
Aug 2, 2008

Feels like I just got laid

Doctor Borris posted:

IF you want to hear what 2 40k hardcore nerds think of AOS listen to Signals from the Frontline 417. These are guys who run the ITC and have single-handedly organized the biggest 40k convention network on the west coast. They are usually very positive and they listened to an AOS Audiotape they found in the hands of a dead hobo in a alley in Texas.

This Is Their Story
https://www.frontlinegaming.org/2016/03/15/signals-from-the-frontline-episode-417-aos-audio-book/'

Its also a very short story.

I would, but I'm not spending 40 min looking at a 40k program. Why don't you just give us the gist of it?

adamantium|wang
Sep 14, 2003

Missing you
I'm gonna go out on a limb here and suggest the gist is "it's bad"

Avenging Dentist
Oct 1, 2005

oh my god is that a circular saw that does not go in my mouth aaaaagh

Don't forget the cantrips:

Dancing Wizard
Mage Wizard
Wizard Spray :grin:

Reubenesque Sandwich
Aug 1, 2006
Their flashing tongues, spitting out blood and poison.
Fun Shoe

Coward posted:

Melf's Acid Melf
Tenser's Tenser Tenser
Otto's Irresistible

In his defense, Otto is in fact quite irresistible.

Syrnn
Aug 16, 2004

They say that their spells require touch attacks, but I'm still thinking about getting that restraining order.

Pierzak
Oct 30, 2010

Syrnn posted:

They say that their spells require touch attacks, but I'm still thinking about getting that restraining order.

Nice avatar/post combo.

koreban
Apr 4, 2008

I guess we all learned that trying to get along is way better than p. . .player hatin'.
Fun Shoe

adamantium|wang posted:

I'm gonna go out on a limb here and suggest the gist is "it's bad"

Those guys are some of the worst of the GW-fellators out there. It's largely because they've staked their entire business model on making the dumb game tournament competitive. Anything dumb that GW does is just an opportunity for them to pitch their painting service, show that fat pro-starcraft dork and talk about how amazing their homebrew tournament format is.

I would be shocked if they were absolutely negative about anything GW does.

Sir Teabag
Oct 26, 2007
Cliff notes of the book start at 5:30 for those interested.

For those not:
Some Stormcasts have to fight their way somewhere.
Manfred is their buddy, then a bad guy, then sides with them again.
20 minutes of Nagash apparently talking about how great he is.
Stormcast all killed by Nagash.
Manfred runs away.
"It was terrible"

30 minutes audio book for 30 dollars.

Sir Teabag
Oct 26, 2007
"But if you're going to listen to an audio book, it isn't a bad one to listen to."

Moola
Aug 16, 2006
its terrible

buy it now!

Nebalebadingdong
Jun 30, 2005

i made a video game.
why not give it a try!?

Sir Teabag posted:

30 minutes audio book for 30 dollars.

lol

Moola
Aug 16, 2006
can I buy in seperate installments of 1 dollar a minute?

Leperflesh
May 17, 2007

Sir Teabag posted:

30 minutes audio book for 30 dollars.

I really shouldn't be surprised. I shouldn't. But gently caress me, I'm surprised, that's insane.

I bought this 13 CD very entertaining factual but also somewhat speculative biography of Caesar Augustus on sale for less than $30. It filled basically an entire round-trip drive from california to colorado and back. And the amount of time and effort that went into just recording this audiobook, much less writing the original, puts games workshop's garbage-quality fan fiction to utter shame.

I feel embarrassed for anyone who would pick an age of sigmor audiobook over this. Or really over any unabridged audio book of an actual good book.

e. Amazon has it "buy used" with Prime free shipping for $12.

Moola
Aug 16, 2006

Leperflesh posted:

I feel embarrassed for anyone who would pick an age of sigmor audiobook over this.

same but extending to anyone who spends any money on GW products or plays 40k/30k (im not including AoS in there cause its not a game)

Business Gorillas
Mar 11, 2009

:harambe:



if you guys wanna listen to something cool and good, i'd recommend Till Death Do Us Blart, which is an apparently yearly installment where 2 podcast groups get together each year for the rest of their lives to watch and review Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2.

Kilo147
Apr 14, 2007

You remind me of the boss
What boss?
The boss with the power
What power?
The power of voodoo
Who-doo?
You do.
Do what?
Remind me of the Boss.

Moola posted:

same but extending to anyone who spends any money on GW products or plays 40k/30k (im not including AoS in there cause its not a game)

With the exclusion for HoR Kill Teams, of course?

Moola
Aug 16, 2006
i dunno

you should probably try Deadzone / Infinity

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Kilo147
Apr 14, 2007

You remind me of the boss
What boss?
The boss with the power
What power?
The power of voodoo
Who-doo?
You do.
Do what?
Remind me of the Boss.

Moola posted:

i dunno

you should probably try Deadzone / Infinity

Infinity is dead in the PNW. Malifaux has sold more in two days than infinity has in a year at Mox Boarding House. Other stores are following suit.

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