Star Citizen: Big MoMA's House

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Asema: Oct 2, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

https://twitter.com/dsmart/status/714545175339614208

soon(tm)

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:12

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 30, 2024 10:06

G0RF: Mar 19, 2015; Some galactic defender you are, Space Cadet.

[Sandi's FB] "An interview with our Vanduul language expert - Britton Watkins - exciting!"

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:12

Kakarot: Jul 20, 2013; by zen death robot; Buglord

CrcleSqreSanchz posted:

Lesnick wiped the sweat off his brow. He leaned against the solid metal pole he ripped from the cheap walls for support. He waited, like a loyal dog, for his master. He shuffled his feet, and blinked a few times. His blurry vision had become a problem. Had the doors to the entrance of the building opened? No. Just the wind.

More sweat. Lesnick felt his body shift, and almost fell to one side. He gripped the metal pole tighter, trying to keep his balance. It had been three minutes since he lumbered to the foyer, waiting for Chris. They had much to discuss. Sales were down. Refunds were up. The PTU was rushed out on Friday, and now many people could not fly their ships. He had sent out word to his followers to invoke a cover story about damaged .cfg files. But he knew that would not last. No, he needed Chris's visionary mind to snap its attention on the problems at hand, and solve them before lunch. Chris could do that. Chris could to anything. Lesnick wrapped his sausage fingers around his cross, a reminder of the pledge he made to himself in a dimly lit, rancid sock smelling room years ago. He would not let Chris down.

He looked at the clock. Another minute. His knees cracked, his bones moaned. Layers of skin shook. His eyes darted to a desk beside him, noticing his body was making the pens on the desk jitter. He needed to sit down. He grabbed the nearest chair, a four thousand dollar chair made out of seal skin and orphan tears, and toppled backwards into it. The impact shook the windows. The chair held, but creaked with uncertainty.

At the same time, the doors flung open. A small, insignificant man wearing all black shuffled inside while keeping his head down. The sunglasses over his eyes did not allow Lesnick to see the creative, wonderful soul of his mentor and his friend.

"Chris!" Lesnick said with a gleeful smile. Chris responded by giving a half nod, and trying to quicken his pace towards the elevator. "Chris wait! We need to talk about the weekend. Reports are flying in about the PTU, and that loving Genesis singer released another video mocking our creation. Our creation Chris."

Chris muttered something under his breath, and started to poke the elevator button with increased intensity.

"Chris, we also need to talk about that project you dumped funds into. It seems the artist may have--" Lesnick tried to get off the chair, only to be thwarted by the laws of physics. He put the metal pole to the ground and started to row himself towards the elevator. The scraping of metal on tile made Chris shiver, as the chair creaked along with Lesnick's plan. Lesnick huffed, trying to remember a time when he exerted so much energy. The chair moved an inch, wailing with an unnatural warning sound that it could not hold itself together.

"Chris, we really--" Lesnick dug the pole into the ground and shoved off again. This time the chair gave up on life, and fell apart. Metal, leather and plastic twisted and melted together as the wheels snapped off and flew into opposite directions of the room. Lesnick fell, face forward, towards the ground. He hit the ground six inches from the ground. He waved his arms and legs, trying to grab the floor. He heard the elevator doors open.

"--know you can take care of it," the soft, mushed voice of Chris said as he stepped into the elevator. Lesnick looked up, beaming with pride at his long-time friend and nodded.

"You bet boss. I can take care of it!" Lesnick shouted as the doors closed. Lesnick smiled, remarking internally on what a great guy Chris was. Realizing he had work to do on internet forums, Lesnick tried to rise to his feet. He found, to his horror, that he could not get his feet or his arms to the floor. Fifteen seconds of thrashing occurred before Lesnick, having exerted himself to a breaking point, fell asleep on the floor.

***
Chris looked up at the elevator lights, trying not to let the sight of Lesnick bring him down off his buzz. Last night had him smoking everything not nailed down, and he felt it now. Reality started to creep back in. The pressure, the weight of 110 million and the people behind that money crept into his mind. His name, his credibility all hanging out to dry.

He shook his head. He just needed to get down to the sub-basement level. His level. His private level. Then everything would be okay.

He paced the elevator, cursing it for not moving faster. He could now remember players clipping through space stations, logo's on said space stations disappearing and reappearing. He remembered rage. Rage, that if he were honest, was aimed at himself. But he was not honest, and so he remembered the goons. The trolls who had taken his pride and joy and mocked it.

A childish, squeaky scream burst from his lungs as his fist pounded a well-dented side of the elevator. He sobbed, tears streaming down his face.

The elevator dinged. The doors opened. Snot dripping from his nose, Chris peered into the darkness. A vast, empty room with one lit computer. His computer. In it, stored all the mocap animations. He smiled, and wiped the tears and snot from his face. He loaded up the animation and watched Gary Oldman clip through a desk. His raspy, inapplicable accent filled Chris's ears like fine music. He started to laugh. He had nothing to fear. This game, this majestic epic, would put everyone's fears to rest. He would silence all the so-called smart people with one release. Soon, very soon he would be hailed as the visionary he knew he was. And on that day, Chris thought with an evil sneer, Kevin Costner could rub his feet.

Alarms jolted Chris from his daydream. He switched screens on his computer to the front entrance camera's. He saw Lesnick, snoring. But what he saw walk in through the door made his skin crawl. His blood turn to ice.

Sandi had arrived, and the day suddenly looked bleak.

I like the Ben parts more

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:12

Ohtsam: Feb 5, 2010; Not this shit again.

Eightace
Lives
Eternally

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:12

eonwe: Aug 11, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

Asema posted:

https://twitter.com/dsmart/status/714545175339614208

soon(tm)

then he will say APRIL FOOLS, STAR CITIZEN WAS AWESOME

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:13

G0RF: Mar 19, 2015; Some galactic defender you are, Space Cadet.

Eonwe posted:

then he will say APRIL FOOLS, STAR CITIZEN WAS AWESOME

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:13

Dusty Lens: Jul 1, 2015; All Glory unto the Stimpire. Give up your arms and legs and embrace the beautiful agony of electricity that doubles in pain every second.

Haha he got us again.

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:13

sorla78: Oct 11, 2012; EAT THE PAIN AWAY!

Asema posted:

https://twitter.com/dsmart/status/714545175339614208

soon(tm)

sigh... 3 days is a bit far from "now", so off we go.

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:14

Thoatse: Feb 29, 2016; Lol said the scorpion, lmao

Goobs posted:

Can we get an ETA?

I'm sorry, but we are all out of ETA's, but they're on backorder. May I interest you in this fine ELE though?

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:14

D_Smart: May 11, 2010; by FactsAreUseless; College Slice

Beer4TheBeerGod posted:

Translation: "We've ignored this subforum for years now and someone recently stumbled on it and discovered how embarrassing it looks compared to the good old days."

No, that's not it. It's part of the new directive that I'm going on about.

More to come.

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:15

Madcosby: Mar 4, 2003; by FactsAreUseless

Asema posted:

https://twitter.com/dsmart/status/714545175339614208

soon(tm)

oh i cant wait

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:15

eonwe: Aug 11, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

listen, I don't even care if nothing comes of this

the anticipation is fun

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:15

AP: Jul 12, 2004; One Ring to fool them all
One Ring to find them
One Ring to milk them all
and pockets fully line them; Grimey Drawer

Natron posted:

BTW, I had to look up ELE, and found both Extinction Level Event and Engine Life Expectancy. Make you think...

Switching engine would easily buy them another 18 months I think.

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:15

Madcosby: Mar 4, 2003; by FactsAreUseless

Eonwe posted:

listen, I don't even care if nothing comes of this

the anticipation is fun

thats citizen talk

get em

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:15

Goobs: Jan 30, 2016; Doxcat is watching you PU.

Thoatse posted:

I'm sorry, but we are all out of ETA's, but they're on backorder. May I interest you in this fine ELE though?

only if it comes with LTI.

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:16

D_Smart: May 11, 2010; by FactsAreUseless; College Slice

D1E posted:

EightAce Collective: can we get an update please?

The thread is still being massively cockteased.

Thanks!

He can't.

There is absolutely no way that anyone still at CIG and who knows what transpired last week - and still playing out - is going to leak (anon or now) it without being discovered, fired, and possibly sued (for breaching NDA).

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:16

CrcleSqreSanchz: Aug 21, 2002; I'm feeling something new...something...I'm happy??!!

While we are all waiting to release, here have a thing

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:16

sorla78: Oct 11, 2012; EAT THE PAIN AWAY!

D_Smart posted:

He can't.

There is absolutely no way that anyone still at CIG and who knows what transpired last week - and still playing out - is going to leak (anon or now) it without being discovered, fired, and possibly sued (for breaching NDA).

That sounds like they got bought out...

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:17

moveable shape: Oct 18, 2015

D_Smart posted:

1) Yes. It's the start of a catastrophic cascading doomsday effect that is going to start playing out effective now

Smart if your bluster doesn't start paying off today I am going to be genuinely upset! I know you cannot help yourself ('on the spectrum', etc) but it's time for the daily, urgent doomsaying to deliver. I for one am hopeful you won't pull a Roberts on this

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:17

Google Butt: Oct 4, 2005; Xenology is an unnatural mixture of science fiction and formal logic. At its core is a flawed assumption...

that an alien race would be psychologically human.

lmao that posters get visibly upset at Derek posts

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:17

Tank Boy Ken: Aug 24, 2012; J4G for life; Fallen Rib

tooterfish posted:

Meanwhile, three years ago.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iTBvpd3_Vqk&t=280s

Well it's not in Elite at the moment. Though :thejoke:

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:17

Happy Sisyphus: Nov 13, 2013; You take the blue paarp - the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red paarp - you stay in pre-alpha, and I show you how deep the sperg wallet goes.

too excited about extinction to focus on my work

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:17

Norefund14days: Feb 2, 2016; NO ONE CAN HEAR YOU PARP IN SPACE.

I see your catte and raise you Spec Ops catte.

Only registered members can see post attachments!

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:18

Madcosby: Mar 4, 2003; by FactsAreUseless

D_Smart posted:

He can't.

There is absolutely no way that anyone still at CIG and who knows what transpired last week - and still playing out - is going to leak (anon or now) it without being discovered, fired, and possibly sued (for breaching NDA).

it sounds like you got funneled false information and they're counting on you running with it in exactly this fashion to make a fool of oyu

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:18

Beet Wagon: Oct 19, 2015

Daztek posted:

If nothing happens today I'm going to buy so many Starfarers

Daztek's cursor hovered over the checkout button. His hand trembled, unwilling to take the necessary steps. Wiping away the sweat that was gathering on his forehead, he shut his eyes and tried to think logically about what was happening. He couldn't do this. His wife would leave him, he'd be unable to pay his bills, there were so many reasons why this was a bad idea... But the darkness didn't help him think. Every time he tried he faced a cacophony that grew louder and more insistent. The office was silent, but all he could hear was the deafening roar of a thousand voices telling him to pledge. To support Chris Roberts. To out-do Sarsapariller. He was impotent in the face of their hurricane, unable to resist any longer.

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:18

DigitalMocking: Jun 8, 2010; Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
Benjamin Franklin

CrcleSqreSanchz posted:

While we are all waiting to release, here have a thing

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:18

Eldragon: Feb 22, 2003

Asema posted:

https://twitter.com/dsmart/status/714545175339614208

soon(tm)

That's a really different meaning of "Now" than I'm familiar with.

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:18

Natron: Aug 5, 2004

AP posted:

Switching engine would easily buy them another 18 months I think.

If they switched to a proper engine they could probably get right back to where they are now with less jank in about a month, provided their assets could carry over. Still would be a big blow to backer confidence, though, and would make all those years kicking CryEngine's corpse around useless and a complete waste of money. Not that wasting money stupidly has every really stopped them before, I guess.

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:18

Google Butt: Oct 4, 2005; Xenology is an unnatural mixture of science fiction and formal logic. At its core is a flawed assumption...

that an alien race would be psychologically human.

Madcosby posted:

it sounds like you got funneled false information and they're counting on you running with it in exactly this fashion to make a fool of oyu

you're really salty, why is that?

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:19

Daztek: Jun 2, 2006

https://twitter.com/dsmart/status/714546115350282240

Does anyone feel unsettled when Derek uses smilies like this

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:19

orcinus: Feb 25, 2016; Fun Shoe

Eonwe posted:

I've never liked space games

You don't really like space ships, do you?

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:19

ZenMaster: Jan 24, 2006; I Saved PC Gaming

Certainly a retread of DS9, looks like it was cut down a bit and then a bit of stretch/skew:

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:20

Kilmers Elbow: Jun 15, 2012

Eonwe posted:

listen, I don't even care if nothing comes of this

the anticipation is fun

Hi Sting.

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:20

eonwe: Aug 11, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

Derek, I hate to tell you, but if this is a blog deadline you've been very late on your blogs before

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:20

Madcosby: Mar 4, 2003; by FactsAreUseless

Google Butt posted:

you're really salty, why is that?

?

did you mean to quote me?

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:20

Samizdata: May 14, 2007

CrcleSqreSanchz posted:

I want to see Lesnick, for serious, realize his life is worth more, lose like 250 lbs., feel a new surge of self-confidence, realize his place in all this, spit in Croberts (and by association his old life) eye and leave. I want him to weather the storm of the cultists going for his head by continuing to take care of himself, rising from the bottom with his wife. I want, near the end of this game collapsing, for photo's to surface of those two looking healthy and happy. Then when the cards fall, I want Lesnick to benefit from this by releasing a tell-all book that gets turned into a movie. And then, one day, years from now, a happy, non-toxic Lesnick sits at a book signing, smiling as he catches a reflection of himself in the window and realize he's come a long way. Then he goes back to signing books.

Tell me that wouldn't be a feel-good story.

That would be, especially if the missus were to make the change with him.

The one good thing out of the CIG debacle.

(Well, that, the burgeoning YouTube career of :pgabz:

, and all the awesome people I met here. Still hope for the Smart AAA bestselling title to boot.)

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:21

Goobs: Jan 30, 2016; Doxcat is watching you PU.

Daztek posted:

https://twitter.com/dsmart/status/714546115350282240

Does anyone feel unsettled when Derek uses smilies like this

Like when a kidnapper offers his child victim some ice cream.

# ? Mar 28, 2016 21:21

AP: Jul 12, 2004; One Ring to fool them all
One Ring to find them
One Ring to milk them all
and pockets fully line them; Grimey Drawer

Asema posted:

https://twitter.com/dsmart/status/714545175339614208
soon(tm)

Precisely as I predicted.

AP posted:

What reasonable for expecting most of these issues to be resolved? Three months maybe, give extra for the holidays, I wonder where things will stand at the end of March.