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Horking Delight posted:The self-reflection and apparently sincere effort to get to the underlying reasons behind your behavior (boredom, stress, etc) and, once you have that understanding, the plans to address the root cause. This. KG I've said some harsh things to you in this thread, and every single time it's been about you going through the same motions over and over of a pattern that was sabotaging all your goals. Now you're starting to see it. I've broken a few deeply ingrained habits in my life, and in no case was I able to even start that process until I could see my behavior for what it was. When you're in the moment and your brain is telling you lies, it's natural to automatically listen because otherwise you have to admit "my perception of what's happening is faulty" or "what I think is the best action to take will actually hurt me in the end". It sucks feeling like you can't trust yourself, and it's hard work changing, and you're starting on that road anyway. That's really awesome! The good news is, after you have that flash of insight once it gets easier to do it again. Both in terms of seeing other bad behaviors for what they really are, and being able to swallow your pride and accept that there's something about yourself that you want to change.
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Mar 25, 2016 18:47
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Knyteguy posted:Thanks guys. So what exactly do you find promising? The analytical behavior? It's a combination of you looking at the root causes for your behaviors which are destructive to your stated goals, and a willingness to at least discuss personal failings. Those personal failings are NOT reflecting your moral quality as a person. They're just part of being human, and we all have personal failings. Some of them may be things which you can change to be more desirable, for you, with Therapy. Some of them may be things that are just how your brain is wired and you'll need to develop strategies and habits to short circuit or counteract them. But confronting them and discussing them will make meeting your stated goals more realistic. Getting Therapy will help you confront and discuss them.
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Mar 25, 2016 20:22
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Huh. Ok, well thanks. I'll try to continue the pattern, then. I don't think that this is necessarily new, but perhaps it's just one of the few times I've shared. I thought the thread was supposed to be more about "hard numbers" than motivation and how I'm feeling about not only the day-to-day stuff, but the process in general. I'm... glad about that actually. I don't mind sharing more I suppose. Re: sharing. My old therapist did say I should share my feelings more, and that I guess it was OK to have them, and you guys are echoing that. I'll continue to try my best with that. I know it's only day 2 or 3 but I'm still MoodPandaing (I'm still not sure what the hug button protocol is. Do I hug a guy!?). My days so far seem to be small ups and downs, but obviously there's not enough data. Interview Phone interview done. This is... my second C# interview I've had. I know it's not the most popular language, but sheesh. Interview was only culture stuff, questions about my background and current position, relatively small stuff. Open office environment (bleh), Agile, lots of team communication. Those last parts would help me be more team oriented, which I need. My software dev interview experience so far (30-40 or so initial phone interviews, in person interviews, and followups that I've had throughout my career): - Companies attracting top talent tend to have live algorithm or coding tests. Either over the phone (some sort of notepad-like live coding), or they'll feel you out and do whiteboard or coding on a computer. Two companies that have done this with me are HP, and that San Diego job I nearly got. - Below this there are companies with technical tests to be emailed in. Some companies choose short time frames (< 4 hours), others give candidates more time. I don't like the time frame companies personally. It reminds me of something they'd do to push a deadline (get this thing ship-ready I don't care what corners need to be cut). Companies with longer time frames are better in my opinion. This is subjective between the two, but at least they have some sort of barrier to entry. - Below this are companies that ask you a few job-specific questions that don't evaluate your overall skills, but instead your niche skills. Tell me about "X" in software "Y", why do you do this? What does this do? What is the purpose of [specific feature]? It indicates a familiarity with the dev environment and the system, but a coder like this might be writing every variable as "float a, float b, float money" (coding horror alert), etc. - Below this are companies without devs in the hiring process at all. This isn't necessarily their fault, but often they hire people when they can't judge them on skill. This is my current job, which frankly I was a lower end newbie here, but I had the will to learn more (and still try to). Their previous devs were... pretty lousy to anyone reading their code. You can tell it was rushed and good habits were few and far between for many. There are literal 10,000 line stored procedures, 5,000 line methods, ridiculous logic, poor security implementations, and more. Source control wasn't used until I pushed it, etc etc. Anyway I thought that may help a starting dev to try to evaluate a place. Barriers to entry are good. The more barriers the better. I'd like to hit that top tier eventually, but I think I need to hit the second tier. I've gotten offers in the 3rd tier and 4th tier recently, but I think I'm above that now. Now I'm wary to put in a ton of effort to this place, just because I'm frankly so tired of interviewing, and I feel like something will go wrong, either on my end or theirs. The boss will be a psycho, or I'll be totally under their expected skill, or they won't offer enough and won't budget, etc. But I have a technical test to email in. It's totally doable, XML parsing to CSV output, a couple gotchas I think I've figured out, and I have a until "sometime next week" to turn it in. Negotiating (I'll crosspost this to Dwight's thread for extra input): They asked me what salary range I was looking for so we wouldn't "waste your time or ours", I responded that "I don't really feel qualified to put a salary range on a job, so I'd like to see what you'd offer", again with "well we really don't want to waste anyone's time", I countered with "I don't think any offer is ever a waste of time". She said "OK, so you're open to negotiating", and I said "yes". I'm getting pretty good at dodging throwing the first number out there now. Post got a lot longer than I expected, but hey I like to milk the career side stuff sometimes. I found a web dev job by perusing Facebook, so I applied there also (it's in Reno).
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Mar 25, 2016 22:44
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Knyteguy posted:Now I'm wary to put in a ton of effort to this place, just because I'm frankly so tired of interviewing, and I feel like something will go wrong, either on my end or theirs. The boss will be a psycho, or I'll be totally under their expected skill, or they won't offer enough and won't budget, etc. Again. Catastrophizing. "We expect disaster to strike, no matter what. This is also referred to as “magnifying or minimizing.” We hear about a problem and use what if questions (e.g., “What if tragedy strikes?” “What if it happens to me?”). For example, a person might exaggerate the importance of insignificant events (such as their mistake, or someone else’s achievement). Or they may inappropriately shrink the magnitude of significant events until they appear tiny (for example, a person’s own desirable qualities or someone else’s imperfections)." All I can really do is point out this is a pattern you do, it's unhealthy, and you should see someone about it because the longer you wait to address it the worse it becomes
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Mar 25, 2016 23:41
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Knyteguy posted:Huh. Ok, well thanks. I'll try to continue the pattern, then. I don't think that this is necessarily new, but perhaps it's just one of the few times I've shared. I thought the thread was supposed to be more about "hard numbers" than motivation and how I'm feeling about not only the day-to-day stuff, but the process in general. I'm... glad about that actually. I don't mind sharing more I suppose. Having feelings is part of being human, and feeling frustrated, or bored, or even having the feeling that you would like to blow a lot of money on frivolous things is also part of being human. There's a lot of enculturation that tries to villify feelings, but feelings have no moral values. What you do with your feelings, and how well you are able to retain your decision making abilities in the face of those feelings is what is important. If you feel something and you don't express it by acting on it, it's still important to express it by e.g. posting about it in the thread, talking with Janus, etc. Knyteguy posted:Interview Don't let cargo cult indicators tell you how good a company is to work for. My last company had no technical involvement in hiring at early stages until someone seemed like a candidate for cultural fit and other dimensions (e.g. compensation). After you passed that bar you went through a technical phone screen and then two 2-hour pairing sessions. If you're not talking to technical people at first contact, that might be because they're keeping their technical people delivering technically until after vetting you with HR people. Good job on not showing your hand. If you're doing as good a job of keeping things running as you say in this thread you'll probably show them you're worth more than you're making now. Play it out until you get an offer, it's not a waste of time to get an offer letter, even an insultingly low one.
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Mar 25, 2016 23:41
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Knyteguy posted:My software dev interview experience so far (30-40 or so initial phone interviews, in person interviews, and followups that I've had throughout my career): If you're feeling exhausted from too many interviews, my immediate reaction is you're probably not applying to jobs that would match up with what you're really good at.
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Mar 27, 2016 18:56
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Dwight Eisenhower posted:Having feelings is part of being human, and feeling frustrated, or bored, or even having the feeling that you would like to blow a lot of money on frivolous things is also part of being human. There's a lot of enculturation that tries to villify feelings, but feelings have no moral values. What you do with your feelings, and how well you are able to retain your decision making abilities in the face of those feelings is what is important. If you feel something and you don't express it by acting on it, it's still important to express it by e.g. posting about it in the thread, talking with Janus, etc. Yeah I'm generally like all closed up feelings-wise... I think I know why. I guess what I meant with the tiers, was not "how good a company is to work for" completely, but I think it's an indicator. Agreed on the cultural fit, and of course compensation  .My Rhythmic Crotch posted:Just speaking personally, I think it's kinda silly that you're sorta ranking and judging companies based on what the interview questions are like. I would never make it a goal to work at a company because they ask "the hardest" questions during the interview. My current gig sounds kinda like yours - there was no version control when I first got in, code is a disaster, etc, but that just gave me ample room to implement good practices and build new awesome new stuff to replace their tired old garbage. I really like that they kinda only have a vague idea of what they want and trust that I will just "do it right" and don't necessarily want to pick apart every line of code that I write. I was also immediately hooked on this job, because the first person from the company to talk to me was my boss, not an HR drone, he asked me a few interesting Linux questions right off the bat, and I could tell that I would like working there. Anyway I'm rambling, but that's kinda how I feel. Not so much the interview questions, just if they have some sort of barrier to weed out people whose only experience is with like a Java class in high school. But it doesn't really matter everyone is making good points. I don't think a company can be judged on a single thing either. Anyway I'm done with the technical test, so I'll turn it in tomorrow. I've added it to my Github, so even if everything else is a waste of time at least I have some extra in my portfolio. All I can post now I'm sick (again). Kids sure like getting sick.
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Mar 28, 2016 03:14
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So, Knyteguy, regarding our April challenge: The outline I proposed and you agreed to was three categories. 1. Target debt repayment goal 2. Target discretionary expenses goal 3. Target personal goal We still have a few days left in March, but my plan for the first two categories is to post my YNAB numbers for January, February, and March in the thread. Then my goal for April debt repayment is going to be my average debt repayment for the three preceding months, +20%. And my goal for April discretionary expenses will be my average for the three preceding months, -20%. My personal goal for April is to record 20 workouts in the month, 2 of which must be 5K events (the entry fees of which will be subtracted from my discretionary, of course) I'll post my times for the two 5K events in the thread once I complete them. Sound fair? As far as a prize for winning or consequence for failure, I'll leave that up to you and/or the thread, but I DO NOT want it to be a financial consequence, whether that be a ban or otherwise. It seems counter-productive to me to punish financial failure with more financial consequences.
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Mar 28, 2016 03:46
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Dwight Eisenhower posted:If you're not talking to technical people at first contact, that might be because they're keeping their technical people delivering technically until after vetting you with HR people. My Rhythmic Crotch posted:I was also immediately hooked on this job, because the first person from the company to talk to me was my boss, not an HR drone I am a former 'HR drone' (seriously, dude?) who had to dip my toes into IT recruitment on occasion. I would shortlist with the IT manager or solutions architect for the technical skills, and then I would do the initial phone interviews basically to check that these people were functional human beings because oddly enough there are some loving strange people out there that have no business being hired even if they are technical wunderkinds, and sometimes hiring managers get so caught up on the technical side of things that they overlook some otherwise pretty terrible behavioural issues. So don't take it personally that the IT manager may not be the first person you talk to, and know that the manager and HR person work in concert to make sure that the hire is both technically sound (manager) and not a raving lunatic or otherwise offensive to others (HR). E: Of course it's mind-numbingly obvious, but I assumed that since people get so butthurt about it that they clearly had not realised that there was a totally rational reason for having that intermediary step in there. Because why get lovely about it if you know the rationale? Tamarillo fucked around with this message at 05:42 on Mar 29, 2016 |
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Mar 28, 2016 07:14
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Are you suggesting that tech workers might be insufferable and hire more insufferable people if someone does not explicitly check them for social skills? ... Because, ooooohhhhh man, what a loving understatement. With some of the company cultures I've heard of (and some of the poo poo people put ON THEIR RESUMES WTF), that's so painfully true.
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Mar 28, 2016 17:10
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Horking Delight posted:Are you suggesting that tech workers might be insufferable and hire more insufferable people if someone does not explicitly check them for social skills? Wait what I've never heard of insufferable IT workers with poor social skills...  (God it's even written in the third person I never noticed that) I was more talking over the entire process though, not just the initial interview. I interviewed with a senior technical engineer this time, but I wouldn't hold it against any company if yeah it was HR or something at first. The interviewer was a little cold though which surprised me. Nearly 10 minutes late calling for the interview, no response to my "thank you for the interview" email, a poor response to an I/O question clarification, and she still hasn't replied to an email I sent on Friday clarifying a discrepancy between the input sample and output sample they sent (She's 3 hours ahead in NYC). I just sent in the project with an "I'm assuming you're busy so... here it is finished." type of note, and added that I'd update the program if I was incorrect on the discrepancy. IllegallySober posted:So, Knyteguy, regarding our April challenge: Wow those are some ambitious goals. Personally for a prize I'd be down with just an "honorary winner" type of thing. Sounds fair to me. Let me think about what I want to goal out on.
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Mar 28, 2016 21:22
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Tamarillo posted:I am a former 'HR drone' (seriously, dude?) who had to dip my toes into IT recruitment on occasion. I would shortlist with the IT manager or solutions architect for the technical skills, and then I would do the initial phone interviews basically to check that these people were functional human beings because oddly enough there are some loving strange people out there that have no business being hired even if they are technical wunderkinds, and sometimes hiring managers get so caught up on the technical side of things that they overlook some otherwise pretty terrible behavioural issues. So don't take it personally that the IT manager may not be the first person you talk to, and know that the manager and HR person work in concert to make sure that the hire is both technically sound (manager) and not a raving lunatic or otherwise offensive to others (HR).
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Mar 29, 2016 01:35
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Knyteguy posted:Wait what I've never heard of insufferable IT workers with poor social skills... It's ambitious, yes- but considering you've had the thread analyzing your every move for the last however long, I feel that's fair. I have been trying to reduce my expenses but obviously haven't been under the scrutiny you have.
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Mar 29, 2016 03:13
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March final or close enough. I need to allocate the non-rollover to prepare my debt payment. Subscriptions owes itself $19.50 or so. The seedbox ended up billing again after I cancelled, so I filed a Paypal dispute. Shouldn't be a problem as I have no active service. Business should have been $50 more, but I used it to ship the PS4 (the profits of which didn't went to debt). Here's the after:  So about $600 above expected debt pay down. Pretty good! edit: actually it looks like it's actually $730 extra contributed to April. IllegallySober posted:So, Knyteguy, regarding our April challenge: OK. 1. Target debt repayment goal: $1100. I've technically already achieved this, so I have a one-up on you. A slip or something would screw this up though. 2. Discretionary goal: -20% is steep on a whole so I doubt I can match you there. I don't want to get back in the cycle. My discretionary goal for the month will be >= $100 left in my discretionary at the end of April. That's $70 less than March's spending for me. 3. Personal goal: quitting smoking. I'm starting today. I was out the door to buy more just now... but I came back in after thinking about the money. I'm loving tired of spending all of my discretionary here. I'm tired of stinking, standing in the frigid cold, coughing, and not tasting anything again. I'm throwing out another non-competition goal: I want to sell most of the stuff I mentioned earlier this month on SA Mart, for extra debt in May. Probably going to keep the second tablet however (again we got a free replacement), as my wife is starting to use it. Let me know if that works for you. Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 02:05 on Mar 30, 2016 |
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Mar 30, 2016 01:49
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Knyteguy posted:March final or close enough. I need to allocate the non-rollover to prepare my debt payment. All right, all of that is fine. I will post my final numbers Thursday night. I am not a month ahead at this point because of my irregular income issues, so mine will look more like a reconciliation than yours will, which is fine. You'll still get the idea. Based on the numbers I ran the other day I think I'll be looking at somewhere between $700-725 as my debt repayment goal and around $600 as a discretionary goal. That discretionary sounds awfully high and there's a lot of room to improve it. That figure includes basically everything I do other than eat and pay bills- but I may have a one-up on you there kind of like you have one on me with debt repayment. I'm going to add to my personal goal and include no drinking alcohol from now until the end of April. Should help the discretionary quite a bit there too!
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Mar 30, 2016 02:46
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Knyteguy posted:Wait what I've never heard of insufferable IT workers with poor social skills... This looks like something useful if someone ends up on unemployment and has to go through the motions of applying for a job.
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Mar 30, 2016 20:02
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Antifreeze Head posted:This looks like something useful if someone ends up on unemployment and has to go through the motions of applying for a job. That's... crafty. IllegallySober posted:All right, all of that is fine. Awesome. Good luck, and hopefully we both meet our goals. It all starts tomorrow!
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Mar 31, 2016 17:28
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Quick updates: I signed up for one more credit card. An Amazon Chase Rewards card. 3% cash back through Amazon purchases, 2% cash back through gas stations/restaurants/drugstores, 1% cash back for everything else. For getting approved I received an $80 gift card, so that's $80 cash freed from pets that's going towards debt this month. I didn't buy anything when I got the card or whatever. I almost did, but decided to hold off for a bit. The free $80 and actual rewards finally got me though. I already set it up to autopay in full. So we finally have a main card. The cash back won't make a huge difference, but it will at least help passively cut monthly pet expenditures, since that's really the main recurring Amazon expense. In 3 hours I'll be 48 hours without a cigarette. I'm almost through the hardest part. No turning back now. Sorry Sober I would have waited for April, but... it just hit me suddenly to stop immediately. Interestingly, WhyQuit.com mentions - "Why Prior Attempts Failed - Contrary to conventional wisdom, a permanent successful recovery is vastly less dependent upon "planning" than "understanding." In fact, findings from two studies indicate that spontaneous attempts are twice as successful as planned ones (see West 2006 and Ferguson 2009). Although poorly understood, it seems to suggest that delay in getting started breeds needless anticipation anxieties that sap and erode determination, motivation and resolve." I just figured out I spent roughly $133 on cigarettes in March. That's $1,600 in the next 12 months freed up. Should help free up some debt money, or at the very least I just won't be spending my money on cancer sticks. Still Moodpanda ing. Crazy nice community. I missed one day when I was sick, but since I started that's it. I'm trying to do multiple updates per day for more insight.
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Mar 31, 2016 21:21
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Knyteguy posted:In 3 hours I'll be 48 hours without a cigarette. I'm almost through the hardest part. No turning back now. Sorry Sober I would have waited for April, but... it just hit me suddenly to stop immediately. There's a good chance that's the dumbest reason to apologize anyone's ever given me. Don't ever apologize for quitting smoking too soon! (I also stopped drinking Tuesday, so we both started early!)
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Mar 31, 2016 21:31
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Knyteguy posted:For getting approved I received an $80 gift card, so that's $80 cash freed from pets that's going towards debt this month. Just a warning, it feels like you're counting your chickens before they hatch again (like "I put in extra income because we're selling the sand rail this month"). Try waiting to the end of April before declaring how much money you saved in April by not smoking. Also, I think you might still be thinking about your budget wrong. It tracks how much money you spend. The $80 gift card is additional income, but it doesn't mean you didn't spend anything, so your pet spending should still equal however much pet stuff you bought that month. I dunno; the way you phrased it sounds funny, but you might already be doing this.
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Mar 31, 2016 21:42
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IllegallySober posted:There's a good chance that's the dumbest reason to apologize anyone's ever given me. Don't ever apologize for quitting smoking too soon! Haha, yeah I know it's just that it's against the spirit of the competition. If you started early too then we're on even grounds though, so all is good! Cool I don't know your history or your reasons, but I hope that you meet whatever it is you're trying to accomplish. I'm really liking the thread right now. No arguing, no justifying, no talk of buying stuff (really), just seems like it's positive stuff. Horking Delight posted:Just a warning, it feels like you're counting your chickens before they hatch again (like "I put in extra income because we're selling the sand rail this month"). Try waiting to the end of April before declaring how much money you saved in April by not smoking. Part two: Yeah I'm doing that (tracking spending). I'm using the gift card how you mentioned it earlier in the thread. So it's just flat out budgeted income, and since the budget is set already with the numbers already agreed upon, the income displacement from the gift card goes towards debt. Basically it's a windfall with 100% going towards debt. In my financial future I will probably come up with a hard rule for windfalls (x% for Y financial goal, z% for discretionary), but for now 100% to debt is fine. We're only saving ourselves money in interest the quicker we burn through this car loan. We're slated to pay $166 in interest in April. I want my money back that's more than smoking used to cost. Part one: Very intentional. I'm pretty resolute in my decision to quit smoking. I won't go back now. I may not know exactly how much I'll save by not smoking in April, but I know my cigarette expenditure will be $0. e: Horking I think it was you that mentioned that I could potentially ask the thread for cheap anti-boredom ideas. Anyone have some interesting suggestions? Nothing on the computer or in front of the TV please. For example this weekend I was thinking of fixing up my Dobsonian telescope, but I may hold off on that since parts are kind of expensive. Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 21:56 on Mar 31, 2016 |
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Mar 31, 2016 21:54
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Go for a walk/hike. Use the weight set you own.
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Mar 31, 2016 21:57
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We have had a ton of success by conquering projects around the house. All our closets and cabinets are cleaned out. We spent one Saturday just cleaning the hell out of our car.
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Mar 31, 2016 21:59
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Knyteguy posted:In 3 hours I'll be 48 hours without a cigarette. I'm almost through the hardest part. No turning back now. Sorry Sober I would have waited for April, but... it just hit me suddenly to stop immediately. You'll be able to taste food again, which is nice. But food will be tastier, so don't eat too much.
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Mar 31, 2016 22:00
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n8r posted:Go for a walk/hike. Use the weight set you own. Hm well we'll be doing a walk and lifting weights for sure Saturday morning. Hike maybe it depends on the weather. We got 12" of snow this past Monday. I think I'll do everything I can with my telescope that is free, and then use the hike as a contingency plan. Oh and fix up the garage so I can play my drums, and clean the yard. Boom weekend planned. Thanks. Also I went through the trouble of both making and uploading this image for my last post, but I forgot it. Here it is so I can say I didn't waste my time doing that stuff.  Edit: RheaConfused posted:We have had a ton of success by conquering projects around the house. All our closets and cabinets are cleaned out. We spent one Saturday just cleaning the hell out of our car. Yeah I like this idea. Oh and another thing - get everything ready to sell. And I need to throw away the shower curtain (the clear one that goes inside the cloth one) that poo poo got gross somehow. Probably $10 but well worth it. Inept posted:You'll be able to taste food again, which is nice. But food will be tastier, so don't eat too much. Nice. I'm already starting to notice my sense of smell is a little better also.
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Mar 31, 2016 22:02
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Knyteguy posted:In 3 hours I'll be 48 hours without a cigarette. Awesome. Really proud of you for this. Looking forward to a good April. I like all the great self-awareness you've been showing. Keep it up!
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Mar 31, 2016 23:16
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Yay for no cigarettes!
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Mar 31, 2016 23:21
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Go play your drums!!! Do you have any music to play? I have some "classical" snare solo books...they're written recently, but you know what I mean. Just solo snare drum, but they include some cool looking tricks. They're pretty fun, even for a lame percussionist like me. Were only like 8 bucks a book, not too much of a discretionary hit.
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Mar 31, 2016 23:34
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ExtrudeAlongCurve posted:Awesome. Really proud of you for this. Looking forward to a good April. foxatee posted:Yay for no cigarettes! Woohoo! Thanks. Hawkgirl posted:Go play your drums!!! Do you have any music to play? I have some "classical" snare solo books...they're written recently, but you know what I mean. Just solo snare drum, but they include some cool looking tricks. They're pretty fun, even for a lame percussionist like me. Were only like 8 bucks a book, not too much of a discretionary hit. I used to have a book to play, but I haven't used it in days and days. Yeah good idea maybe I'll pick up a snare book again. I've been at a plateau from "just playing" for awhile, so learning some new chops would be great. Any particularly awesome snare books you'd recommend? I haven't had much passion to play lately, but I think throwing a wrench in things could help. Plus my wife is playing her violin really often right now, and I'm getting a little jealous. I'll probably pick up this one at least since it's what I used to have, and came highly recommended. 
Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 00:27 on Apr 1, 2016 |
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Apr 1, 2016 00:23
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For whatever reason, pawn shops always have tons of music books. If shopping isn't too tempting for you, maybe check out a pawn shop.
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Apr 1, 2016 00:35
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Here's to hoping April's as great as the end of May is Knyte. Great to see all this positive change and good happenings!
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Apr 1, 2016 01:11
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Start doing stuff that doesn't involve spending a single dime before you can do it.
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Apr 1, 2016 01:25
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Well, I spend a lot of time on computer stuff so my own plans are usually $$ on going out or video games/TV/reading/talking with friends, but: Cooking? Make your meal plan for the week now and do things that can be frozen. Hiking/walking? Pack a picnic and take your kid to the park? Any books you bought but haven't read yet? Do something with your kid? I don't know anything about kids so these might not be age-appropriate but make some simple papercrafts to play with (origami, airplanes, whatever)? My friend taught his baby (simple) sign language so he could express things himself a little bit while still pre-verbal, too. Playing with any toys/gadgets you already have is always good (I'd try to avoid buying things first if possible but $10 or whatever isn't that much really). Bring the kid to visit family? Aren't you working on your own business? (Computer, unfortunately, but still.) I thought you had side projects. Plus everyone else's suggestions. Edit: I FORGOT YOU HAVE DOGS. Just pack a picnic and go play outside!! Colin Mockery fucked around with this message at 02:12 on Apr 1, 2016 |
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Apr 1, 2016 02:02
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Yard work? I feel like working on our house has really been fulfilling instead of spending money. This month we have: hung a bunch of shelves we had lying around, totally cleaned out the office and guest room, including boxes that we had had since we moved three years ago, and gotten rid of a ton of poo poo. Donated and sold. We made almost $300 at half price books from selling a combo of board games, DVDs and a small amount of CDs and video games. We also did all the cutting back in our yard that was needed so poo poo would look great for spring, and it does! Our roses are blooming like crazy and it's so great! And yeah, hikes with the dogs. Maybe try to teach the dogs some tricks using youtube.
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Apr 1, 2016 02:31
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All right, below are my YNAB numbers. I cropped off the actual account balances on the left side only because the last time I had a thread here, someone thought it would be funny to play internet detective and got a little too creative with my personal info. I've un-hidden all categories for the purposes of the screenshot, even though several of those categories I don't use anymore (or in the case of my student loans, they are on forbearance until June)  Using these numbers and based on what I said my goals would be, that leaves the following: Goal #1- Hit debt payoff target in April (last three months average +20%): $767.66 Goal #2- Hit discretionary spending target in April (last three months average -20%): $692.31 Goal #3- Hit personal goal target in April: 20 workouts, 2 of which will be 5K running events AND no alcohol for the month (started 3/29) The debt payoff target will be somewhat difficult. The discretionary target should not be. The personal goal is in the middle. Looking forward to a spirited competition this month!
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Apr 1, 2016 05:01
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Knyteguy posted:Yeah I like this idea. Oh and another thing - get everything ready to sell. And I need to throw away the shower curtain (the clear one that goes inside the cloth one) that poo poo got gross somehow. Probably $10 but well worth it. $10 really isn't that much, but I recently learned that you can throw those plastic ones in the washer instead of replacing them, and then let them air dry. Just in case you didn't realize that was an option.
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Apr 1, 2016 17:41
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Got up at 6 AM to hit the gym before work this morning, KG. One down, 19 to go.  Hope you're still doing well not smoking!
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Apr 1, 2016 18:48
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IllegallySober posted:Got up at 6 AM to hit the gym before work this morning, KG. One down, 19 to go. Thanks good job. Yep doing alright. Have some head fog and lightheadedness that I'm annoyingly self-conscience about, but going good otherwise. 19 sure is a big number though let me know if you want to give up  qmark posted:$10 really isn't that much, but I recently learned that you can throw those plastic ones in the washer instead of replacing them, and then let them air dry. Just in case you didn't realize that was an option. Hm maybe. I'll definitely keep that in mind, and see if my wife wants to try it. Thanks for the tip. RheaConfused posted:Yard work? I feel like working on our house has really been fulfilling instead of spending money. This month we have: hung a bunch of shelves we had lying around, totally cleaned out the office and guest room, including boxes that we had had since we moved three years ago, and gotten rid of a ton of poo poo. Donated and sold. We made almost $300 at half price books from selling a combo of board games, DVDs and a small amount of CDs and video games. We also did all the cutting back in our yard that was needed so poo poo would look great for spring, and it does! Our roses are blooming like crazy and it's so great! Yep some yard work is necessary I suppose. I'm not much looking forward to it. Horking Delight posted:Well, I spend a lot of time on computer stuff so my own plans are usually $$ on going out or video games/TV/reading/talking with friends, but: Picnic I like that idea. We'll probably do that. n8r posted:Start doing stuff that doesn't involve spending a single dime before you can do it. Steep request unless it's on the computer or something. I'm not unwilling to try, but it seems like everything costs at least something. Might try to get the bikes going this weekend, though. If I find time after everything else. Old Greg posted:Here's to hoping April's as great as the end of May is Knyte. Great to see all this positive change and good happenings! Thanks me too. MAKE NO BABBYS posted:For whatever reason, pawn shops always have tons of music books. If shopping isn't too tempting for you, maybe check out a pawn shop. Good call I'll see if I wanna check some out tomorrow. Pawn shops don't really interest me all that much, so I'm not too worried about perusing.
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Apr 1, 2016 22:05
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It's been a good month all-around, then! I (ended up sick last last week and stayed in the whole time and) was super on budget, which means I have plenty left to eat out for dinner tonight once I figure out what I want.  EDIT: Now that the month is over, how do you feel? This was your first month on the new budget. How did you feel while spending towards it? It got a little rocky for you during the middle of the month, but you came under in your discretionary and the padding in your other categories meant that those other categories were able to contribute their little bit towards extra debt paydown. How did you feel while spending your discretionary? Did you feel it was a large enough discretionary budget that you were able to get a reasonable amount of what you wanted? Do you think your discretionary needs to be larger? (If you do, uh, there's not much you can do about that but it's still good to know about.) What about your stress levels? Did you feel tracking your expenses was more stressful, less stressful, or about the same as your previous budgets? How do you feel about the prospect of doing it again next month? Are you anxious? Are you excited? Do you dread it? Do you look forward to it? How do you feel about April? Do you think next month you can keep your spending within the budget? Is there anything you're worried about? Are there any expenses next month (registration due, other appointments, birthdays, anniversaries, trips, etc.) that you know you should set aside some of your discretionary for? (Therapy at the least, since that's your April goal, remember.) One situation that's happened before and gets frequently brought up is the cut -> binge cycle. Do you think you're at risk of that next month? If so, what do you think you can do about it? If not, how does that make you feel? How much closer are you to being debt free? How does that make you feel? Are you pleased with your progress? Are you dissatisfied? If so, why, and what do you plan on doing to change that? How do you feel about your April budget? How do you feel about your challenge with IllegallySober? You've been using MoodPanda for a little bit. Do you like it? Has it been helping? I'm not a teacher, this isn't a homework assignment, I'm not trying to be condescending or anything, if any of your feelings are personal and you don't want to share them with the thread, that's totally fine (you should probably share them with JanusOwl though), and a lot of this is stuff you've already mentioned before anyways. But I think it would be good for you to make the effort to really sit down and think about "I did these things, and this is how I feel about it, and based on how I feel I want to do more of it (or do less of it, if you feel bad about it)" and reflect on the month, even if just for yourself. My contribution: I feel good about the end of this month for you. I feel cautious, because it's still too soon for things to become a real pattern, but I think you've made some good progress and I'm really happy that you came in under budget, because if you can reliably come in under budget, then you can start to make plans that depend on that. I think your use of MoodPanda has been really good for you, and I'm really glad you seem to be liking it, and I'm hopeful about your therapy plans. I think the tone of the thread has really mellowed out and taken a positive turn now that it feels like you're finally putting in the emotional labor necessary to change the habits and patterns that have previously been hamstringing you at every opportunity. Compared to the lifetime of the thread, it hasn't been very long at all, but I feel optimistic (tempered with a cynical "we've sort of cycled around success -> failure -> more success -> more failure before") and pleased with your current progress, and a little bit curious/excited/interested to see how your competition with IllegallySober will go, because it sounds like a fun minigame (of sorts) for you to participate in. Colin Mockery fucked around with this message at 04:16 on Apr 2, 2016 |
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Apr 2, 2016 02:18
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Horking Delight posted:It's been a good month all-around, then! I (ended up sick last last week and stayed in the whole time and) was super on budget, which means I have plenty left to eat out for dinner tonight once I figure out what I want. So a couple quick updates - Bad news 1) So I just went to check out the registration on the Corolla to see when it's due while posting this (to double check when Horking asked whether registration was due). Turns out it was suspended due to lack of insurance back from when Geico cancelled (so the same reason as before). I just paid it and put it under efund since I considered it an emergency. My wife and I will use our discretionary at the beginning of next month to refill the emergency fund coffers. Now I can pretty clearly tell you how I'm feeling about that: mad at Geico, mad at the DMV, and mad at myself. However I'm happy that we can take care of this within budget. Why I paid it without a fight this time: A little self flagellation for screwing up in the first place, and I felt like I needed to just end it. The stress of potentially not having our main car available for weeks while fighting it would have been incredibly impractical. Letting the insurance lapse in December was a stupid mistake that I will not let happen again. This won't affect the challenge or the debt repayment schedule since it's ultimately coming from our discretionary money. That bums me out because it constrains, but I consider it a necessary evil at this point. Good news 2) Paid the extra debt payment. $1235.35 extra this month, and I did the minimum car payment early to update this chart. Here's how we're looking:  Mind you that's ONLY if we don't put another cent towards debt beyond our budget extra amount (403.75). That's basically impossible. I'm cautiously optimistic that we should come in under schedule. Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 00:59 on Apr 3, 2016 |
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Apr 3, 2016 00:49
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