Henchman of Santa posted:

If you've never told someone "if you are a false, do not entry," you're not a real metal fan.

Possibly Chicken posted:

Agreed, and it's "Don't Entry"

quote:

I hold your hands
in mine
The rest of you
is scattered all over

Your rib cage is open
like a great white's jaws
Your legs look so sexy
out of context

quote:

I hold your hands
in mine
The rest of you
is scattered all over

Your rib cage is open
like a great white's jaws
Your legs look so sexy
out of context

quote:

Coming from Hell
Metal we sell
World full of blood
Mainstream sucks

We come for war
Like Hell we roar
We come for blood
Hip hop is hosed up

We are the death metal war machine

The Bringer of War
The Lords of Gore
The Lords of Battle
The Bringer of Death Metal

We make the sound
Of the battle-ground
Debauchery is coming
Now it's time for killing

We are the death metal war machine

We are the death metal war machine from hell

Henchman of Santa posted:

If you've never told someone "if you are a false, do not entry," you're not a real metal fan.

CRIP EATIN BREAD posted:

MDF could do with less melodic black metal, anyways.

More palm muting, less tremolo, imho

Kumbamontu posted:

I've been jamming some old Arch Enemy recently. I forgot how awesome the Liiva era was

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t8djxzU8DOk

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bGVUCThyKus

Need more recs for 90s Gothenburg kinda stuff that isn't In Flames/Soilwork/Dark Tranquillity/etc

Henchman of Santa posted:

I guess Destruction are taking on internet trolls now or something. This is the art for their new single.

Henchman of Santa posted:

If you've never told someone "if you are a false, do not entry," you're not a real metal fan.

Kumbamontu posted:

Ceremonial Oath is one of those bands that I hear about a lot but never actually managed to look up and listen to so that seems like a good place to start. Thanks!

a retard posted:

So I guess Metal Archives' April Fools joke is getting rid of the reviews. Kinda lame compared to previous years of fake government takedowns and Nickelback.

xzzy posted:

It would have been funnier if they just replaced any attempt to view a review with a 404 error or a random review for another album.

Hulk Krogan posted:

Every review links to babymetal. Imagine the tears.

Vulture Culture posted:

Wyzt posted:

That would save me a bit of travel time. Metal Threat Fest is doing a good job of it in Chicago though, that line up is killer for a first year.

Some more self promotional spam: My full length album is streaming in full on Decibel Magazine's website.

http://decibelmagazine.com/blog/2016/3/29/stream-the-death-metal-soundtrack-to-the-dark-corners-of-sci-fi-by-nucleus

Zodijackylite posted:

Imagine no more, since embeds don't work in reviews this is the closest you'll get.

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/Myrkur/M/514764/Zodijackyl/113957

Vulture Culture posted:

The one from last year was phenomenal

Fiendish Dr. Wu posted:

I had a guy on the metal subreddit tell me he was the shreddit elite and that I am a false. Unironically.

In a thread about silly metal pictures.

Vulture Culture posted:

The one from last year was phenomenal

A human heart posted:

Maybe he was telling the truth

HellBlazer posted:

Given the massive public outcry at our decision to no longer host user submitted reviews (not to mention the deep divides this decision has created among our own staff), as well as the amazing level of support many have shown for the reviews, we have decided to reverse our previous decision to remove reviews from The Encyclopaedia Metallum. We will be restoring all of the reviews from a previous backup of the site, so no information will be lost.

While we now realize that we underestimated the scale of support for user reviews, the reasons why we initially reached that decision remain. While it is a relatively straightforward process to moderate the veracity of information submitted to the main site (though it is admittedly time consuming), things get much more complicated when it comes to the moderation of the inherently subjective nature of user reviews. In the end, it is ultimately impossible for our staff to moderate user-submitted reviews in a way that reflects the Metal Archives' devotion to neutrality. Our increasingly strict guidelines and rules for user reviews often served as a barrier to entry for beginner writers and for those for whom English is a second language. In addition, we do not want our staff spending valuable time moderating an often contentious review queue when they could be working to help keep our database complete and accurate.

With these things in mind, we will, from this point forward, no longer be moderating user submitted reviews before they are posted to the site. All reviews will be automatically accepted. To prevent point abuse, users will no longer be able to earn site points via user submitted reviews. We instead encourage those looking to contribute and increase their ranks to work on adding new information and, if user rank is high enough, working on the report queue.

quote:

Chuck Schuldiner knew his time was coming. After all, him being a rampant homosexual, he would have continuous unspeakable and unprotected anal sex with multiple men, as all homosexuals do. Eventually he became unlucky enough to catch the ultimate slow killer known as AIDS, which soon reached his brain and turned into a lethal tumorous growth that eventually ended his life.

And so that's when he started to write the world's first pro-gay heavy metal album. It contained everything Death's fans loved, especially his riffs which made metalheads excrete fecal matter through their torn denim jeans as well as extremely personal lyrics regarding aggressive homosexual activity disguised as philosophical rants of a genius. It even includes a cover version of Judas Priest's classic Painkiller song (most likely as an ode to Rob Halford and his stance on homosexual pride and defiance against HIV). Now, you ask any seasoned death metal fan about the homosexual content and they would argue and even threaten about you supposedly insulting one of the greatest frontmen of all time, but the truth is that most death metal fans are uneducated and don't even usually read any text with much thought. But the evidence is all there; tracks such as "Bite The Pain" encourage homosexuals to handle the pain of anal sex, "Flesh And The Power It Holds" is an obvious ode to erect penises, "To Forgive Is To Suffer" is a statement regarding forgiving intolerant homophobes of their beliefs due to their strict bigoted upbringings. Even the album's title "The Sound of Perseverance" is a clear ode to legions of homosexuals waving their rainbow banners and yelling their proclamations for tolerance (and deep seated hatred for straight women) They probably don't even realise the mountain on the cover art is supposed to depict an extreme gay orgy amidst the mists of Hell, proving that gaykind are willing to suffer in agony in the afterlife for the sake of pleasuring one another, if their bigoted chistian enemies prove to be true.

I give this album 0% because I was raised on good wholesome conservative values and do not agree with this album's message for homosexual supremacy. Sure, it's got riffs, but love for riffs does not forgive tolerance for mentally ill degenerate men performing carnal acts of fornication with eachother.