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mannerup
Jan 11, 2004

♬ I Know You're Dying Trying To Figure Me Out♬

♬My Name's On The Tip Of Your Tongue Keep Running Your Mouth♬

♬You Want The Recipe But Can't Handle My Sound My Sound My Sound♬

♬No Matter What You Do Im Gonna Get It Without Ya♬

♬ I Know You Ain't Used To A Female Alpha♬

AllanGordon posted:

lol all the white people stopped watching the black daily show guy and followed another white to laugh at how racist the republicans are

yeah it was just white people that stopped watching the daily show :twisted:

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Mad Wack
Mar 27, 2008

"The faster you use your cooldowns, the faster you can use them again"

CortezFantastic posted:

I still catch the Daily Show and to be fair, Trevor is still easing into the role. His biggest issue is that since he hasn't been in America long enough to really grasp the insanity enough to make jokes that hit. He'll be fine with time. John Oliver was on the show for years and years so he was easily more able to step into the role.

Where is he from originally? Africa? I stopped watching when Stewart died.

SixFigureSandwich
Oct 30, 2004
Exciting Lemon

Trump/Sanders 2016

dorkasaurus_rex
Jun 10, 2005

gawrsh do you think any women will be there

So some smart/opportunistic Log Cabin Republican types might try to force ANOTHER fight on the Republican party at the convention, tired of being second class citizens in their own party:

http://www.politico.com/story/2016/04/the-gops-other-convention-nightmare-221477

Honestly, they'll be so worried about fracturing and exhausted of infighting I'd even believe they'd change the platform to placate the gays once and for all. This is the best year.

Edmund Sparkler
Jul 4, 2003
For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

No Mans Land posted:

Cause I'm making you look like fools regularly? I guess keeping me around for the entertainment value backfired. I've got more right to be in this thread than most of you, again. I'm actually voting for a Republican. Next

Yes, your non-stop poo poo posting in this thread is raising all ships.

Lastgirl
Sep 7, 1997


Good Morning!
Sunday Morning!

Drunkboxer
Jun 30, 2007

No Mans Land posted:

The propaganda of shame?

"Hey France, you hear about America? I hear their strawberry fields are infested... with Mexicans!

Thump!
Nov 25, 2007

Look, fat, here's the fact, Kulak!



Mad Wack posted:

Where is he from originally? Africa? I stopped watching when Stewart died.

Trevor Noah is a South African comedian.

shiksa
Nov 9, 2009

i went to one of these wrestling shows and it was... honestly? frickin boring. i wanna see ricky! i want to see his gold chains and respect for the ftw lifestyle
So on the last page nml posted four fuckin times in a row.

I didn't read em of course, but seriously

mannerup
Jan 11, 2004

♬ I Know You're Dying Trying To Figure Me Out♬

♬My Name's On The Tip Of Your Tongue Keep Running Your Mouth♬

♬You Want The Recipe But Can't Handle My Sound My Sound My Sound♬

♬No Matter What You Do Im Gonna Get It Without Ya♬

♬ I Know You Ain't Used To A Female Alpha♬
https://twitter.com/RogerJStoneJr/status/718793603737325568
https://twitter.com/RogerJStoneJr/status/718794688371826688

Louisgod
Sep 25, 2003

Always Watching
Bread Liar

Sending out an STS

No Mans Land
Feb 26, 2016

by Cowcaster

shiksa posted:

So on the last page nml posted four fuckin times in a row.

I didn't read em of course, but seriously

I bet you did though

Lum_
Jun 5, 2006
NML for IK

his shitposting ninjitsu is above par

Thump!
Nov 25, 2007

Look, fat, here's the fact, Kulak!



https://twitter.com/INJO/status/718799073277583361

Fritz Coldcockin
Nov 7, 2005

Adar posted:

Cruz is, at this point, the toughest opponent the Republicans could put up. He'll be weakened but as I've been saying since before Iowa his organizational skills are Obama 2008-esque. He is extremely good at every aspect of this job except the part where he has the charisma of a brick. He's also a good debater. It's very possible for him to win a GE against an almost as historically unpopular Hillary, although some things would have to break his way to get there.

And the fact that he has no ability to make friends, his endorsements are all reluctant at most, and he looks like a slime goblin.

Cruz has a history of extremism on both social and economic issues that won't play well with blue-state Republicans desperately trying to hold onto their seats, either.

I agree that he's the only one running the race like it should traditionally be run, but he's got to be the most repulsive person--both physically and philosophically--that ever got this far. I just don't see it.

If Trump goes into the convention with a decent-sized lead in the delegate count and he is denied the nomination, I believe he follows through on his third-party threat. Look at what he did to Jeb! for just denying him a license to build a casino in Florida--what do you think he'd do to the Republican Party if they denied him what he felt was his "due"?

Fritz Coldcockin fucked around with this message at 15:22 on Apr 9, 2016

Nameless_Steve
Oct 18, 2010

by Pragmatica

Ooh! I get to mark another box on my Fascism checklist! "views the democratic process as an impediment"

Joementum
May 23, 2004

jesus christ

Thump! posted:

"SCHLONGED" -Academy Award winning actor Richard Dreyfuss

We're gonna need some bigger hands.

Thump!
Nov 25, 2007

Look, fat, here's the fact, Kulak!



You know the thing about Cruz, he's got... lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll's eye. When he comes at ya, doesn't seem to be livin'. Until he primaries ya and those black eyes roll over white. And then, ah... then you hear that terrible high pitch screamin' and the election turns red and spite of all the poundin' and the hollerin' they all come in and rip you to pieces.

Joementum
May 23, 2004

jesus christ
He knows the best people and is great at building organizations.

https://twitter.com/jasonnobleDMR/status/718809387658117122

Bryter
Nov 6, 2011

but since we are small we may-
uh, we may be the losers

oystertoadfish posted:

i was making drumpf jokes before john oliver somebody give me a medal

specifically i decided to create germanic compound words for no reason and figured out what his german name was for the purpose

You know who else created Germanic compound words?

Mr Ice Cream Glove
Apr 22, 2007

Tesseraction
Apr 5, 2009


Bad year for the Dems to run on a "Atheism or Death" platform.

Thump!
Nov 25, 2007

Look, fat, here's the fact, Kulak!



Tesseraction posted:

Bad year for the Dems to run on a "Atheism or Death" platform.

Look we just want to see America burn to ashes in the name of the Dark Lord Lucifer, looks like you Republicans have a lot of growing up to do. :shobon:

the paradigm shift
Jan 18, 2006

Tesseraction posted:

Bad year for the Dems to run on a "Atheism or Death" platform.

fuk they aren't? guess I'll have to settle for the cpusa

crazy cloud
Nov 7, 2012

by Cyrano4747
Lipstick Apathy

Yknow I've been reading the new testament lately and I really don't understand how someone could invent as horrifying a theology as Cruz and his pops out of all the perfectly lovely things JC was up to. I didn't before but now the amount of convolution required to derive hate from love is even harder to grok.

crazy cloud
Nov 7, 2012

by Cyrano4747
Lipstick Apathy

Tesseraction posted:

Bad year for the Dems to run on a "Atheism or Death" platform.

The Democratic platform is Atheism AND death, ok

Tesseraction
Apr 5, 2009

crazy cloud posted:

The Democratic platform is Atheism AND death, ok

Oh of course I forgot that 'or' was the 2012 platform. I hope they're not promising too much this time around. :ohdear:

Hunt11
Jul 24, 2013

Grimey Drawer

crazy cloud posted:

Yknow I've been reading the new testament lately and I really don't understand how someone could invent as horrifying a theology as Cruz and his pops out of all the perfectly lovely things JC was up to. I didn't before but now the amount of convolution required to derive hate from love is even harder to grok.

They just are very skilled at taking liberal interpretations with the book. The same type of liberal interpretations that led to such heart warming views as kill them all and let god sort it out which may actually be Cruz's stance once he becomes president.

Prof. Lurker
Mar 10, 2015

I've got the fire of human liberty!

I'm setting fires everywhere!

And humans are turning on everywhere!

Alter Ego posted:

And the fact that he has no ability to make friends, his endorsements are all reluctant at most, and he looks like a slime goblin.

Cruz has a history of extremism on both social and economic issues that won't play well with blue-state Republicans desperately trying to hold onto their seats, either.

I agree that he's the only one running the race like it should traditionally be run, but he's got to be the most repulsive person--both physically and philosophically--that ever got this far. I just don't see it.

If Trump goes into the convention with a decent-sized lead in the delegate count and he is denied the nomination, I believe he follows through on his third-party threat. Look at what he did to Jeb! for just denying him a license to build a casino in Florida--what do you think he'd do to the Republican Party if they denied him what he felt was his "due"?

Could Trump just hop on a 3rd party ticket? An independent run, from my knowledge, costs millions and millions of dollars, and Trump isn't going to spend that just for a spiteful run. I know that the American Independence Party have repeatedly try to get Trump to run for their party.

Tesseraction
Apr 5, 2009

Prof. Lurker posted:

Could Trump just hop on a 3rd party ticket? An independent run, from my knowledge, costs millions and millions of dollars, and Trump isn't going to spend that just for a spiteful run. I know that the American Independence Party have repeatedly try to get Trump to run for their party.

Some states have a 'sore loser' rule that means you can't be on the official ballot if you ran in a primary. However, he could go for a write-in ticket run, which would rely on his supporters to be able to spell 'Donald Trump' which could encounter some difficulty amongst some of his... biggest fans.

Typo
Aug 19, 2009

Chernigov Military Aviation Lyceum
The Fighting Slowpokes

Ted Cruz is a false prophet and god is a superstition

Joementum
May 23, 2004

jesus christ

Typo posted:

Ted Cruz is a false prophet and god is a superstition

Sad!

Mr Ice Cream Glove
Apr 22, 2007

Further proof Ted Cruz is reprehensible

Megyn Kelly asked Ted about his extreme views on abortion.

quote:

"For people like me," Kelly told Cruz, not allowing abortion in cases of rape or incest "may be a problem in getting behind President Ted Cruz."

"I’ve spent a lot of years in law enforcement," Cruz explained. "I was the Solicitor General in the state of Texas and I have handled horrific cases of rape... I went before the U.S. Supreme Court and argued in defense of...capital punishment for the very worst child rapists."

"Rape is a horrific crime against the humanity of a person, and needs to be punished, and punished severely," Cruz stated, "but at the same time, as horrible as that crime is, I don’t believe it’s the child’s fault."

"We weep at the crime," Cruz told Kelly. "We want to do everything we can to prevent the crime on the front end, and to punish the criminal, but I don’t believe it makes sense to blame the child."

Captain_Maclaine
Sep 30, 2001

Every moment that I'm alive, I pray for death!

Tesseraction posted:

Some states have a 'sore loser' rule that means you can't be on the official ballot if you ran in a primary. However, he could go for a write-in ticket run, which would rely on his supporters to be able to spell 'Donald Trump' which could encounter some difficulty amongst some of his... biggest fans.

Badly misspells "Trump!"

*breaks pen*

Captain_Maclaine fucked around with this message at 17:21 on Apr 9, 2016

Slate Action
Feb 13, 2012

by exmarx
What do delegates even do, anyway? Very unfair.

https://twitter.com/jasonnobleDMR/status/718809387658117122

My Imaginary GF
Jul 17, 2005

by R. Guyovich
Ted Cruz would not kill baby Hitler.

Nameless_Steve
Oct 18, 2010

by Pragmatica

Typo posted:

Ted Cruz is a false prophet and god is a superstition

Donald Trump's NY victory speech: "I told you I would beat you, Lyin' Ted! You sniveling boy! Your song and your dance and your superstition didn't save you... I am the Third Revelation! I'm smarter than him... I'm better than him... I am the Third Revelation! I am the Third Revelation!"

Joementum
May 23, 2004

jesus christ

My Imaginary GF posted:

Ted Cruz would not kill baby Hitler.

But if baby Hitler raped another baby, Cruz would argue the state should kill him.

My Imaginary GF
Jul 17, 2005

by R. Guyovich

Joementum posted:

But if baby Hitler raped another baby, Cruz would argue the state should kill him.

This makes sense to me, Joementun. Thank you for helping me appreciate nuance in Ted Cruz's policy positions.

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Salvor_Hardin
Sep 13, 2005

I want to go protest.
Nap Ghost
What if baby hitler was a fetus and he raped his prenatal twin brother?

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