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Sleeveless posted:There would be no comic because Bill Watterson could just spend all day blogging about how much he hates his publisher instead of having it put it in the mouth of a cartoon kid. I dunno, Steve Ditko has been doing that long before the Internet or even home computers, via mailed newsletters. (To this day, you can send $5 to an address in New York and get a big fat Objectivist-laden pamphlet about how much Stan Lee sucks.)
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# ? Mar 22, 2016 10:02 |
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# ? Jun 13, 2024 05:53 |
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Spaceman SPLIFF
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# ? Mar 22, 2016 12:05 |
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snow goons posting on snow forums
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# ? Mar 22, 2016 14:00 |
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Mr. Pumroy posted:snow goons posting on snow forums
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# ? Mar 22, 2016 14:47 |
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Guessing it would look a little like this:
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# ? Apr 29, 2016 09:10 |
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millennials, hobbes! - calvin
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# ? Apr 29, 2016 09:39 |
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It would probably have commented on how anyone with mspaint and an internet connection thinks they can do comics these days
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# ? Apr 29, 2016 11:04 |
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Al Cowens posted:
What's his username
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# ? Apr 29, 2016 13:18 |
Kids can't walk around the block without their parents getting hauled in by CPS these days. Good luck with your free-wheeling adventures in the woods and neighborhood.
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# ? Apr 29, 2016 13:49 |
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Best Giraffe posted:What's his username Tezzor? e: wait, Tezzor isn't that self aware. That's DGSW
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# ? Apr 29, 2016 13:50 |
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Imagine a boy stepping into a box marked 'cismogrifier', forever
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# ? Apr 29, 2016 13:58 |
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After the 2008 housing crash, Hobbes' dream comes true as the family starts stocking a lot more canned food, especially tuna for cheap casseroles. Calvin gets put on Adderall and actually be able to pay attention and perform well at school rather than acting out from his former inability to find salience in the material, and this will be viewed as a bad thing. Rather than create disorganized mobs of snow monsters, he will build poo poo in Minecraft. It's a wonder he never broke any bones while careening at practically terminal velocity down hills fraught with cold hard tree trunks and boulders to smash into, but presumably his toboggan will have more safety features. Wormwood finds a silver sweetheart once the stigma related to online dating subsides, and generally becomes a happier and more inspiring teacher. Stinky_Pete fucked around with this message at 18:26 on Apr 29, 2016 |
# ? Apr 29, 2016 18:17 |
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Bill would make a joke that would trigger someone, and then there would be thinkpieces, and he would abruptly retire to his mountain cabin shunning all human contact.
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# ? Apr 29, 2016 18:25 |
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Hobbes will be CG
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# ? Apr 29, 2016 18:29 |
they'd be called caelvyne and hobbehz
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# ? Apr 29, 2016 18:31 |
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Stupendous Man would be a completely different ethnicity All wagon/ sled stunts filmed with Go-Pro's
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# ? Apr 29, 2016 18:43 |
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Qvindtar posted:Kids can't walk around the block without their parents getting hauled in by CPS these days. Good luck with your free-wheeling adventures in the woods and neighborhood. This drives me nuts. Calvin and Hobbes was my 2nd favorite comic as a kid (behind Bloom County) and I used to do all the insane irresponsible things that Calvin did. In 3rd grade, I was given my head and told to stay within a mile from our lovely home in Cedar Square West (The Ghetto in the Sky, Mpls). My parents were loving and caring, but they trusted me. When we would go back to the farm in the summer, I could go as far as I want. The first day I learned to ride a bike, they let me go about 3 miles to a friends house by myself. Here's the pisser, I'd like to be able to let my kids play around the neighborhood and go walk a half mile down the road and buy a can of Coke, but I'm terrified that I'll be arrested and CPS will take my kids. I keep seeing story after story of a kid walking a quarter mile from their house by themselves, still within vision of the parent, CPS still gets on them. It's made me completely paranoid. My happiest memories are when I disobeyed my parents and would ride my bike for miles and miles in 3-4th grade and do irresponsible things. Crackheads tried to kill me, a guy tried to rape me but I ran faster than him. I was beaten down so badly I couldn't stand and was saved by a group of girls. The cops cited my parents because I was associated with a kid that used to steal motorcycles. It made me who I am. It made me able to deal with anyone and any situation and, though frightened, I can power through it. Remember, we're all scared, the trick is to do it anyway. So many people I work with are afraid to call an angry customer. I was afraid of a coked up child rapist. I can get over the nervousness of getting yelled at. I'm fairly certain that no-one will rape me because they disagree with a payment schedule or results from their treatment. My kids could totally take care of themselves but I'm just paranoid. They're 9 and 7. By those ages, my brother and I were working on the farm with heavy equipment unsupervised. Yeah it's not safe, but it makes you a better person. Calvin and Hobbes would be some poor kid doing endless Common Core homework without time to play with his stuffed tiger. My kids get way more homework then I ever did, yet don't know as much as I did at that age.
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 04:07 |
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calvin and hobbes would still bore me just like every other newspaper comic and i'd have to force a smile when some bonehead clips one out and shows it to me at the office
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 04:12 |
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unless its a gritty reboot as envisioned in my custom text
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 04:14 |
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mostlygray posted:This drives me nuts. Calvin and Hobbes was my 2nd favorite comic as a kid (behind Bloom County) and I used to do all the insane irresponsible things that Calvin did. In 3rd grade, I was given my head and told to stay within a mile from our lovely home in Cedar Square West (The Ghetto in the Sky, Mpls). My parents were loving and caring, but they trusted me. When we would go back to the farm in the summer, I could go as far as I want. The first day I learned to ride a bike, they let me go about 3 miles to a friends house by myself. You just made a gigantic post about how learning occurs outside of school, directly because of your parents and their [in]action, then go on to blame common core (which has nothing to do with homework) for your kids knowing very little instead of taking responsibility for your failure to inspire your kids in the same way your parents inspired you.
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 04:14 |
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No more space adventures because space sucks; superheroes are in. The parents would either be that rich and living in a more urban area, so no grassy hill or river, or keep the hill and river but the parents would be poorer because small cities are shrinking. Maybe Calvin would only be raised by his mom. He would ride around on a razor scooter, if his parents ever let him out because now a days parents are afraid of their kids being kidnapped, hit by a car, or shot. He would play with legos and make videos uploaded to youtube.
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 04:50 |
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How well would this comic work with "loathsome godless Muslim terrorist?"
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 04:58 |
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I mean the kind of shitheads who would get mad at that comic (on both sides of the aisle) also existed in some form or another back in the 80s so I'd imagine it was just as controversial back then.
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 05:07 |
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Kids can't go outside and play ever again, and jobs are fewer and pay less, eventually we will all just sit in a 6x6 steel hog pen with an iPad tapping away to have nutrients pumped in while soothing noises and pretty color flash around us, and algorithms will determine the most profitable way to monetize the gelatinous cubes we've become
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 05:19 |
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In addition to that unicorn comic done by the shaving fetishist IRL creator of that raine-dog comic (the one where the boy fucks his dog and it's an allegory for transgender stuff, somehow) there is a conservative political cartoon ripoff of Calvin & Hobbes titled Prickly City
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 05:56 |
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how me a frog posted:BATKIN AREN'T BUGKIN! Look, who's running this Tumblr account, you chowderheads? Or me?!
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 06:03 |
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Dr. Killjoy posted:
if I ever meet this cartoonist I'm gonna beat them worse than Reagan beat Carter
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 10:05 |
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"I hate mondays" - Calvin the hedgehog
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 10:10 |
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I would think that modern technology and the improved standard of life might temper the negativity and gloom and doom inherent in Calvin's concept that most of us are predetermined to go to Hell. I also bet Hobbes would have some interesting additions to the Leviathan when considering the security and surveillance theater and the panopticon of modern life.
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 13:15 |
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MrWillsauce posted:There is no Hobbes because tigers are going instinct. There are more tigers living in captivity in USA than the remaining number of wild tigers in the whole world, so a kid having one as a pet is still entirely plausible. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8pGTgkcP-RU Sucks that new legislation is making it much harder to get a 500 pound housecat
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 13:26 |
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except calvin is working on a kickstarter project and hobbes morphs into a pansexual iphone app.
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 13:39 |
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 14:03 |
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mostlygray posted:This drives me nuts. Calvin and Hobbes was my 2nd favorite comic as a kid (behind Bloom County) and I used to do all the insane irresponsible things that Calvin did. In 3rd grade, I was given my head and told to stay within a mile from our lovely home in Cedar Square West (The Ghetto in the Sky, Mpls). My parents were loving and caring, but they trusted me. When we would go back to the farm in the summer, I could go as far as I want. The first day I learned to ride a bike, they let me go about 3 miles to a friends house by myself. yikes you had lousy parents cps probably should have been called. your terrible upbringing should be a lesson to all parents why they shouldnt be lazy and let their kids run willy nilly.
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 14:05 |
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John Denver Hoxha posted:I would think that modern technology and the improved standard of life might temper the negativity and gloom and doom inherent in Calvin's concept that most of us are predetermined to go to Hell. I also bet Hobbes would have some interesting additions to the Leviathan when considering the security and surveillance theater and the panopticon of modern life. I think calvin would be sad all the time and i think hobbes would drink heavily
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 14:24 |
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Otto Von Jizzmark posted:yikes you had lousy parents cps probably should have been called. your terrible upbringing should be a lesson to all parents why they shouldnt be lazy and let their kids run willy nilly. His upbringing has led directly to posting in GBS so... Yeah I'd blame the parents too.
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 14:45 |
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mostlygray posted:This drives me nuts. Calvin and Hobbes was my 2nd favorite comic as a kid (behind Bloom County) and I used to do all the insane irresponsible things that Calvin did. In 3rd grade, I was given my head and told to stay within a mile from our lovely home in Cedar Square West (The Ghetto in the Sky, Mpls). My parents were loving and caring, but they trusted me. When we would go back to the farm in the summer, I could go as far as I want. The first day I learned to ride a bike, they let me go about 3 miles to a friends house by myself. What do you think you'd be like now if that guy actually did rape you
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 14:46 |
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Mange Mite posted:What do you think you'd be like now if that guy actually did rape you I'd wager either a 30 year old skeleton buried somewhere in the woods, or posting in E/N.
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 14:52 |
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Calvin would be diagnosed with ADHD and put up on adderall, never seeing Hobbes again
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 15:09 |
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?
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 15:25 |
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# ? Jun 13, 2024 05:53 |
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mostlygray posted:This drives me nuts. Calvin and Hobbes was my 2nd favorite comic as a kid (behind Bloom County) and I used to do all the insane irresponsible things that Calvin did. In 3rd grade, I was given my head and told to stay within a mile from our lovely home in Cedar Square West (The Ghetto in the Sky, Mpls). My parents were loving and caring, but they trusted me. When we would go back to the farm in the summer, I could go as far as I want. The first day I learned to ride a bike, they let me go about 3 miles to a friends house by myself. So what you're saying is, despite being in multiple (and easily avoidable given proper supervision) situations where your life could've been ruined, you were lucky and got through it. Good job.
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# ? Apr 30, 2016 15:55 |