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psydude posted:The worst rear end-chewing I ever received in the Army was because I was wearing an armband while walking to the gym. No amount of loving up at actual important things can trump the importance of properly adhering to PT uniform standards on a 500 person FOB in the middle of the desert. the only reason i still post in the army thread is to remind myself how loving sweet it is that i'm out. FUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCKKKKKK THE ARRRRMMMMMMYYYYYY SMDFTB
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May 10, 2016 01:54
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I got chased by some MP's when I was a young'in living on post because I would steal golf balls that people were slicing off of the ft. leavenworth driving range. They said they were gonna give me 100 hours of community service for each golf ball that I had in my possession but nothing came of it #rebelwithoutacause
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May 10, 2016 02:17
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I've got another MP story. This one time there was this little poo poo stealing golf balls at the driving range at Ft Leavenworth..........
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May 10, 2016 02:44
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psydude posted:The worst rear end-chewing I ever received in the Army was because I was wearing an armband while walking to the gym. No amount of loving up at actual important things can trump the importance of properly adhering to PT uniform standards on a 500 person FOB in the middle of the desert. On my fob we were allowed to run with armbands on, we were also allowed to run in untucked tan tee or unit hoodie tho, couldnt wear headphones outside the gym but the tcns all drove their trucks like insane people so thats probably a good thing
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May 10, 2016 02:57
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spacetoaster posted:I've got another MP story. This one time there was this little poo poo stealing golf balls at the driving range at Ft Leavenworth.......... never scared of the MP's You should have been more worried about the guy in my class who stole tons of porn magazines from all of the stores that sold them at Ft. Leavenworth. Dude literally stole 30-40 magazines over the course of a year. He got caught when he stole an MP3 player, and would have gotten away with it but realized when he opened it up at home it had no batteries. So what did he do? Went back to the PX and stole a pack of batteries and got caught as he left the store. The MP's went through his room and found all the porn, and the MP's laughed and called him the porn king for the rest of the time he had to deal with them.
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May 10, 2016 02:59
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MurderBot posted:The MP's went through his room and found all the porn, and the MP's laughed and called him the porn king for the rest of the time he had to deal with them. Those must have been noob MP's if they thought that was "porn king". I worked customs in theater on a deployment. There's no way to describe the sheer amount of porn that came through.
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May 10, 2016 03:08
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This was like 2000 timeframe so we weren't full on hooah warfighters yet in america.
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May 10, 2016 03:09
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Mustang posted:Wait, so you can't run on post with headphones even in civvies? For safety I'm assuming? Thank god I live off post, even though I don't run with headphones anyways. It's one of many reasons why I haven't lived on post lately. I want to get off work and then forget i am in the army.
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May 10, 2016 03:12
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Mike-o posted:the only reason i still post in the army thread is to remind myself how loving sweet it is that i'm out. FUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCKKKKKK THE ARRRRMMMMMMYYYYYY SMDFTB Same.
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May 10, 2016 03:41
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/r/army is a bunch of war reenacting cosplay nerd autists that somehow actually made it in don't read the whole loving thing obviously, just pick a random spot and remember this was written in earnest quote:The recent outbreak of infantry-on-cav ribbing is all in good fun, but it got me thinking that there are lots of people who don't really understand what Cav is and how it fits into the broader picture. So in the spirit of intra-branch goodwill, I offer this wee FAQ to help those from outside the CAV world who suddenly find themselves in it, or those thinking about joining and trying to choose their MOS.
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May 10, 2016 04:07
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holy poo poo im embarrased to have ever been in the army
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May 10, 2016 06:44
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Nostalgia4Butts posted:holy poo poo im embarrased to have ever been in the army
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May 10, 2016 07:00
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Nostalgia4Butts posted:holy poo poo im embarrased to have ever been in the army
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May 10, 2016 07:44
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that dude enjoyed posting that he thinks he did a good job he thinks that it will make people like him more that is wrong
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May 10, 2016 07:45
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Nostalgia4Butts posted:holy poo poo im embarrased to have ever been in the army
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May 10, 2016 08:12
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Hey SGT why haven't you found this item on your inventory? What do you mean it's a loving typo? Typos have never happened in the history of the military especially not in serial numbers! I don't give a poo poo that you have all the supporting documentation that someone made a typographical error, including network scans, corroborating emails, and inventories prior to that entry... you better tear down everything and find that piece of poo poo that doesn't exist!
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May 10, 2016 09:01
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The greatest trick I ever played was signing over all my section's poo poo. gently caress every note of that noise.
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May 10, 2016 10:41
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Yeah I took over the company armorer position so I could mostly ride a desk out during my stop-loss deployment and by the third or fourth inventory I was ready to stomp on IEDs and climb up mountains for no reason again. That poo poo sucked terribly. Every single thing that ever went to maintenance or broke, no matter how well documented, turned whatever LT's brain to mush. I somehow ended up doing the ammunition too and remember one incident where a we had to send a patrol to go search around a site they had been ambushed at a couple days prior to find and retrieve an expended AT4 tube because someone at battalion insisted that even the empties were sensitive and needed to be accounted for. I didn't even show up to the final handover inventory, thought I was going to end up going to jail or owing the Army a million loving dollars for some missing Vietnam-era seismic sensing equipment or something. I just had some of my guys walk the commander through everything and sign it over to the next poor fucker to inherit my curse. One of them came back and told me it was all good and nothing was missing and it was pretty much on par with getting out of the Army in terms of how happy I was.
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May 10, 2016 11:06
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The greatest trick I ever played was signing over all my life and soul to the army. I played the trick on myself.
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May 10, 2016 11:22
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Aranan posted:The greatest trick I ever played was signing over all my life and soul to the army. Lot's of people do.
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May 10, 2016 13:40
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spacetoaster posted:Lot's of people do. Bunch of idiots.
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May 10, 2016 14:06
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spacetoaster posted:Lot's of people do. 
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May 10, 2016 14:35
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So I work with a guy. We've known each other for about a decade. His daughters won't speak to him, his wife won't divorce him only because of religious beliefs, and he has drama with everyone he works with. When on deployment or TDY he retreats to be alone in his room when work is over. And all of this is because of the Army, and his "dedication" to it. I also know he will be one of the guys who belittles me for retiring and not chasing the next promotion.
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May 10, 2016 14:48
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Stanley Goodspeed posted:Yeah I took over the company armorer position so I could mostly ride a desk out during my stop-loss deployment and by the third or fourth inventory I was ready to stomp on IEDs and climb up mountains for no reason again. That poo poo sucked terribly. Every single thing that ever went to maintenance or broke, no matter how well documented, turned whatever LT's brain to mush. It was more than likely the CSA/ASP/AHA giving them poo poo about it because they are to the point where they need to be turned in during training scenarios but it's not like people police brass up after engaging so I don't know if he was just stupid or his Ammo Officer was. Also running over tubes works just fine.
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May 10, 2016 14:57
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spacetoaster posted:So I work with a guy. We've known each other for about a decade. His daughters won't speak to him, his wife won't divorce him only because of religious beliefs, and he has drama with everyone he works with. When on deployment or TDY he retreats to be alone in his room when work is over. Does he have all of his challenge coins in broad daylight and tell people about when he got them and how he got them on a daily basis? If so, promote that man x2
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May 10, 2016 15:02
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MurderBot posted:Does he have all of his challenge coins in broad daylight and tell people about when he got them and how he got them on a daily basis? If so, promote that man x2 He goes to every ceremony he can. Any opportunity to wear ASU's. He'll even fly across the country to do so. I mean, I go to the MOA banquet every year. But that's because it's usually in a cool place like Hawaii. And it's like a drunken frat party. And I like to party. *edit* It's guys like this that make me realize that managing your local CVS pharmacy for not a pile of money, but having a reasonably stress free life and a happy family is better than this SUPER ARMY OFFICER MAN life. spacetoaster fucked around with this message at 15:24 on May 10, 2016 |
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May 10, 2016 15:21
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Found out I won't be curtailed and can stay in beautiful Wiesbaden until my ETS! 18 months in Monterey (back when DLI was great) and 3 years in Germany on a 5 year contract. And no marriages or kids to boot. Pretty good work environment too honestly. 6 hour days, full pt exemption, chill leadership. BAS, FLPB, and COLA make it a good paycheck too. But reading this thread and so much other information, I know that 99% won't be the case at my next stop if I'd stayed in. Definitely a pay cut too lol. I think I won for the most part. Leaving the table soon and cashing out. Either post 9/11 for an mba or using my experience and TS for a job. Maybe both. Fygm I guess.
moodyhank31 fucked around with this message at 15:54 on May 10, 2016 |
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May 10, 2016 15:52
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moodyhank31 posted:Found out I won't be curtailed and can stay in beautiful Wiesbaden until my ETS! 18 months in Monterey (back when DLI was great) and 3 years in Germany on a 5 year contract. And no marriages or kids to boot. Pretty good work environment too honestly. 6 hour days, full pt exemption, chill leadership. BAS, FLPB, and COLA make it a good paycheck too. But reading this thread and so much other information, I know that 99% won't be the case at my next stop if I'd stayed in. Definitely a pay cut too lol. I think I won for the most part. Leaving the table soon and cashing out. Either post 9/11 for an mba or using my experience and TS for a job. Maybe both. Fygm I guess. Don't forget to go to the TMC/sick call/whatever and get every ache and pain documented. And get copies of that stuff. You can also file your VA claim a couple months before your ETS too. *edit* I spoke to a dude the other day who did 8 years and got out. Me: "Have you filed a claim for VA disability?" Him: "I'm not disabled." Me: "Are you telling me that you did 8 years and you finished in exactly the same physical condition as when you joined?" Him: "Yup  "Me: "Good for you. Bye." spacetoaster fucked around with this message at 16:01 on May 10, 2016 |
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May 10, 2016 15:57
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lol what a retard
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May 10, 2016 16:29
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We're now doing a FLIPL for an item that never existed. gently caress this gay earth.
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May 10, 2016 16:34
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Wasabi the J posted:We're now doing a FLIPL for an item that never existed. They think your dignity was on the property book?
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May 10, 2016 16:53
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Wasabi the J posted:We're now doing a FLIPL for an item that never existed. Isn't there a way to get stuff struck from the books without having to go through all that? Or did you guys just speed past reasonable and end up in full loving retard zone by the time anyone noticed? Where is your supply guy?
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May 10, 2016 19:45
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Stanley Goodspeed posted:Isn't there a way to get stuff struck from the books without having to go through all that? Or did you guys just speed past reasonable and end up in full loving retard zone by the time anyone noticed? Where is your supply guy? Joint environment debbadawg oic shits two hundred miles past full retard. No supply guys. Just custodians signing for poo poo that gets passed on by shop. I'd go to IG of I didn't t have seven more months here. Everyone cycles through so fast, no one would follow up on anything, all I'd do is mark myself. FLIPL is likely to get waived anyway, no one knows what the duck to do about an item being created out of thin air not being counted. I have all my evidence, if it goes tits up I'll report it.
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May 10, 2016 20:05
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Too late now but it's usually easier to get yourself an electric scratch pen / etching tool and just note the "correct" serial below the real one, assuming you're reading poo poo off to a dude with a clipboard or whatever.
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May 10, 2016 20:30
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Stanley Goodspeed posted:Too late now but it's usually easier to get yourself an electric scratch pen / etching tool and just note the "correct" serial below the real one, assuming you're reading poo poo off to a dude with a clipboard or whatever. The thing literally never existed. Nothing to etch
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May 10, 2016 20:33
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Oh I thought you had a typo on the inventory for something you actually owned or whatever. I guess etch SMDFTB-FTA onto your commander instead then. gently caress property and gently caress the army.
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May 10, 2016 20:43
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EVA BRAUN BLOWJOBS posted:They think your dignity was on the property book?  This post is highly underrated, much like EBB's mother.
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May 10, 2016 21:10
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Property accountability has to be the thing I'm least looking forward to this year. Hand receipting down everything I possibly can. I'm sure I'll lose a hammer or something and owe the army a couple thousand dollars.
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May 10, 2016 21:17
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Wasabi the J posted:The thing literally never existed. Nothing to etch Etch it on a beer can.
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May 10, 2016 21:49
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Hey guys. Over heard one today. "When you're all alone on the battlefield, you're gonna wish you pushed yourself on your PT Test." I laughed and got looked at. Didn't look back.
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May 11, 2016 16:08
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