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  addendum to my previous statements: hang all recruiters.
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Jun 9, 2016 20:40
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Leveraging social media!
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Jun 9, 2016 20:45
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Thought I was dating a chick, turned out to be some old dude named Uncle Sam.
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Jun 9, 2016 20:50
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Can she take that rocket emoji and launch it into my barracks to end my suffering?
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Jun 9, 2016 20:53
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Some crusty CSM: Why the hell is she wearing headgear indoors? *swipes right*
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Jun 9, 2016 21:21
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I've been out since 2011, but didn't the army go away from Beret's and it was nothing but patrol caps? Or are we back to beret's in garrison or something? I ask because I sit here waiting for people to call me about jobs and I'm bored. 
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Jun 9, 2016 21:25
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I'm still in and the only time I ever wear a beret is on Fancy Pants Thursdays. And by wear I mean have stuffed in a drawer because I change when I get to work and don't go outside until time to go home.
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Jun 9, 2016 21:29
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Yeah, the PC became your everyday headgear in 2011 (the only useful thing Chandler did), but it's still authorized for wear unless your CO or whomever says otherwise.
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Jun 9, 2016 21:30
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You guys are missing the obvious, "Oh yeah honey Im just using Tinder for work, by the way I have CQ again this friday so I wont be back till saturday morning"
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Jun 9, 2016 21:36
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She's not there to date. She's there to gently caress.
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Jun 9, 2016 21:37
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Ace of Baes posted:You guys are missing the obvious, "Oh yeah honey Im just using Tinder for work, by the way I have CQ again this friday so I wont be back till saturday morning" CQ stands for Cock Quest.
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Jun 9, 2016 21:38
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Mr. Nice! posted:She's not there to date. She's there to gently caress. your life up
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Jun 9, 2016 21:41
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hey hct, did the female recruiters that got caught loving recruits get punished the same as the males, or was there a gender bias? i'm assuming you saw plenty of both.
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Jun 9, 2016 21:47
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Naked Bear posted:Yeah, the PC became your everyday headgear in 2011 (the only useful thing Chandler did), but it's still authorized for wear unless your CO or whomever says otherwise. CT National Guard banned the PC in 2007. Kevlar/Beret only. its prolly allowed again but it really sucks standing in the sun in a wool goddam beret
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Jun 9, 2016 21:56
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Holy poo poo you guys have a terrible medal system 
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Jun 9, 2016 22:58
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we have a terrible everything
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Jun 9, 2016 23:00
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whens the last time a stinger was fired in combat that wasnt immediately followed by takbirs?
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Jun 9, 2016 23:13
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Kung Fu Fist gently caress posted:whens the last time a stinger was fired in combat that wasnt immediately followed by takbirs? By the Air Force. They missed and a Foxbat ate their Predator. I'm pretty sure that's accurate.
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Jun 9, 2016 23:15
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If Tangos are anything to go by then you do not want whatever antibiotic resistant super-strain gestalt that's brewing down there. Probably eats through condoms like xenomorphic blood and leaves your pickle looking like late stage Fourier's gangrene. Trust me, don't Google that.
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Jun 9, 2016 23:23
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It doesn't matter because just like any other dating scam if you swipe right you end up meeting a 40yo balding male anyway.
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Jun 9, 2016 23:53
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mlmp08 posted:By the Air Force. They missed and a Foxbat ate their Predator. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tAneAliAG88
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Jun 10, 2016 00:09
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Mr. Nice! posted:hey hct, did the female recruiters that got caught loving recruits get punished the same as the males, or was there a gender bias? i'm assuming you saw plenty of both. we only had two female recruiters in our company for a short while, for a long time we didn't have any. BN kept them all close to them probably to try and gently caress them. Of the two we had one was married and pregnant to a husband who as in our company as well. The other woman was old enough to be your mom, and I doubt any teen is that hard up.
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Jun 10, 2016 01:04
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Hillary Clintons Thong posted:I doubt any teen is that hard up. Find something in a 16-year-old's room that he hasn't stuck his penis in.
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Jun 10, 2016 02:26
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spacetoaster posted:I've seen all kinds of messed up stuff with tour awards. My favorite award story from that whole ordeal was how the first GO in our chain of command refused to sign off on purple hearts for 3 of my guys because they had already received CABs.
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Jun 10, 2016 02:37
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psydude posted:My favorite award story from that whole ordeal was how the first GO in our chain of command refused to sign off on purple hearts for 3 of my guys because they had already received CABs. There's nothing for him to sign. quote:c. While clearly an individual decoration, the PH differs from all other decorations in that an individual is not http://www.apd.army.mil/pdffiles/r600_8_22.pdf Starts bottom of page 21. As a G-1 I square GO's away all day, e'ryday and crush lower commanders for engaging in stupidity. (actually I just try and help everyone who comes in my office. Even random joes who are walking by.)
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Jun 10, 2016 03:04
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spacetoaster posted:Even random joes who are walking by. I imagine it goes something like this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BaRctjOh9ho
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Jun 10, 2016 04:16
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https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emory_Jenison_Pike shouldn't get the MoH as he is expected to be a leader as the battalion commander, enjoy your ARCOM sir https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leonard_A._Funk,_Jr. shouldn't get the MoH as he is expected to defend himself and not die in the face of the enemy, enjoy your submachinegun marksman badge first sarnt gently caress the army and gently caress chandler in the rear end
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Jun 10, 2016 04:17
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loving Teddy Roosevelt JR got a MOH just for showing up, thats all such bullshit
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Jun 10, 2016 04:19
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Justin Tyme posted:https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emory_Jenison_Pike Politics is a heck of a thing. I've seen 0-6's retire, leaving a star on the table, after learning what being a general entails.
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Jun 10, 2016 04:22
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Hillary Clintons Thong posted:loving Teddy Roosevelt JR got a MOH just for showing up, thats all such bullshit 100+ years after the fact, sure
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Jun 10, 2016 05:55
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Kung Fu Fist gently caress posted:100+ years after the fact, sure he was awarded it in '44 i dont know what you're talking about. he got an award for showing up on the beach. who loving cares. it's less impressive than these guys "doing their jobs" and completely because his rank & name. Awards are and have always been bullshit. you know i'm not talking about Teddy Roosevelt the president right? edit: why do you always come at me negative? CHICKEN SHOES fucked around with this message at 06:28 on Jun 10, 2016 |
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Jun 10, 2016 05:58
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ah didnt see the jr part, my bad. ps i give everyone poo poo, its my thing
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Jun 10, 2016 06:33
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Kung Fu Fist gently caress posted:ah didnt see the jr part, my bad. ps i give everyone poo poo, its my thing it gets kind of old dude
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Jun 10, 2016 06:36
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not for me 
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Jun 10, 2016 06:43
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Kung Fu Fist gently caress posted:not for me do you then, far be it from me to dictate your posting 
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Jun 10, 2016 06:43
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Justin Tyme posted:https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emory_Jenison_Pike Man, I thought this was the cool MoH winner Funk and almost got mad. His is the best goddamn story
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Jun 10, 2016 06:44
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best medal of honor is: BENAVIDEZ, ROY P. Rank and organization: Master Sergeant. Organization: Detachment B-56, 5th Special Forces Group, Republic of Vietnam Place and date: West of Loc Ninh on May 2, 1968 Entered service at: Houston, Texas June 1955 Born: August 5, 1935, DeWitt County, Cuero, Texas. Army Master Sgt. Roy P. Benavidez (center) is flanked by United States Secretary of Defense Caspar Weinberger (left) and President Ronald Reagan at his Medal of Honor presentation ceremony in 1981. Master Sergeant (then Staff Sergeant) Roy P. BENAVIDEZ United States Army, distinguished himself by a series of daring and extremely valorous actions on 2 May 1968 while assigned to Detachment B56, 5th Special Forces Group (Airborne), 1st Special Forces, Republic of Vietnam. On the morning of 2 May 1968, a 12-man Special Forces Reconnaissance Team was inserted by helicopters of the 240th Assault Helicopter Company in a dense jungle area west of Loc Ninh, Vietnam to gather intelligence information about confirmed large-scale enemy activity. This area was controlled and routinely patrolled by the North Vietnamese Army. After a short period of time on the ground, the team met heavy enemy resistance, and requested emergency extraction. Three helicopters attempted extraction, but were unable to land due to intense enemy small arms and anti-aircraft fire. Sergeant BENAVIDEZ was at the Forward Operating Base in Loc Ninh monitoring the operation by radio when these helicopters, of the 240th Assault Helicopter Company, returned to off-load wounded crew members and to assess aircraft damage. Sergeant Benavidez voluntarily boarded a returning aircraft to assist in another extraction attempt. Realizing that all the team members were either dead or wounded and unable to move to the pickup zone, he directed the aircraft to a nearby clearing where he jumped from the hovering helicopter, and ran approximately 75 meters under withering small arms fire to the crippled team. Prior to reaching the team's position he was wounded in his right leg, face, and head. Despite these painful injuries, he took charge, repositioning the team members and directing their fire to facilitate the landing of an extraction aircraft, and the loading of wounded and dead team members. He then threw smoke canisters to direct the aircraft to the team's position. Despite his severe wounds and under intense enemy fire, he carried and dragged half of the wounded team members to the awaiting aircraft. He then provided protective fire by running alongside the aircraft as it moved to pick up the remaining team members. As the enemy's fire intensified, he hurried to recover the body and classified documents on the dead team leader. When he reached the leader's body, Sergeant BENAVIDEZ was severely wounded by small arms fire in the abdomen and grenade fragments in his back. At nearly the same moment, the aircraft pilot was mortally wounded, and his helicopter crashed. Although in extremely critical condition due to his multiple wounds, Sergeant Benavidez secured the classified documents and made his way back to the wreckage, where he aided the wounded out of the overturned aircraft, and gathered the stunned survivors into a defensive perimeter. Under increasing enemy automatic weapons and grenade fire, he moved around the perimeter distributing water and ammunition to his weary men, reinstilling in them a will to live and fight. Facing a buildup of enemy opposition with a beleaguered team, Sergeant BENAVIDEZ mustered his strength, began calling in tactical air strikes and directed the fire from supporting gunships to suppress the enemy's fire and so permit another extraction attempt. He was wounded again in his thigh by small arms fire while administering first aid to a wounded team member just before another extraction helicopter was able to land. His indomitable spirit kept him going as he began to ferry his comrades to the craft. On his second trip with the wounded, he was clubbed from behind by an enemy soldier. In the ensuing hand-to-hand combat, he sustained additional wounds to his head and arms before killing his adversary.[5][note 1] He then continued under devastating fire to carry the wounded to the helicopter. Upon reaching the aircraft, he spotted and killed two enemy soldiers who were rushing the craft from an angle that prevented the aircraft door gunner from firing upon them. With little strength remaining, he made one last trip to the perimeter to ensure that all classified material had been collected or destroyed, and to bring in the remaining wounded. Only then, in extremely serious condition from numerous wounds and loss of blood, did he allow himself to be pulled into the extraction aircraft, Sergeant BENAVIDEZS' gallant choice to join voluntarily his comrades who were in critical straits, to expose himself constantly to withering enemy fire, and his refusal to be stopped despite numerous severe wounds, saved the lives of at least eight men. His fearless personal leadership, tenacious devotion to duty, and extremely valorous actions in the face of overwhelming odds were in keeping with the highest traditions of the military service, and reflect the utmost credit on him and the United States Army.[6] edit: this was 21 people, 12 SF and 9 montagnards against a BN of of 1000+ NVA edit 2 (from wiki) After the battle, he was evacuated to the base camp, examined, and thought to be dead. As he was placed in a body bag among the other dead in body bags, he was suddenly recognized by a friend who called for help. A doctor came and examined him but believed Benavidez was dead. The doctor was about to zip up the body bag when Benavidez managed to spit in his face, alerting the doctor that he was alive CHICKEN SHOES fucked around with this message at 06:55 on Jun 10, 2016 |
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Jun 10, 2016 06:45
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Soulex posted:I think I just found the best MoH winner right here. some stupid loving website posted:
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Jun 10, 2016 07:07
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Soulex posted:Man, I thought this was the cool MoH winner Funk and almost got mad. His is the best goddamn story it is 
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Jun 10, 2016 08:39
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I always love that story. The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Captain Napalm's Thermonuclear League of Liberty > Army Thread - “That was the stupidest loving thing I’ve ever seen!”
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Jun 10, 2016 12:55
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