RE: A ticket came in: Did they take the printer into the shitters with them?

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > RE: A ticket came in: Did they take the printer into the shitters with them?

«‹›1252 »

The Macaroni: Dec 20, 2002; ...it does nothing.

MrMojok posted:

Yessssss! Oh wow how can I have been ignorant of this for so long

Me too--thanks for passing this info on! (Edit for new page: rename MSOffice files with .zip extension, and you can extract or even re-archive at higher compression rate. Works for PowerPoint so you can easily get at all images in a slide deck!)

# ? Jun 14, 2016 14:31

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# ? Jun 1, 2024 15:23

Arsten: Feb 18, 2003

nielsm posted:

So far, selecting all the objects (attempting to select them) has frozen Excel for longer than it took to do the XML edit.

Now trying the VBA method...
well it executed fast, but didn't seem to do much. Opening the Selection Pane afterwards crashed Excel.

Edit: Trying a fixed macro now, using wks.Shapes instead of ActiveSheet.Pictures in the inner loop. So far it's freezing for a significant duration.

Edit 2: Fixed VBA took about 5 minutes to run:
code:
Sub delimgs()
    Dim img As Object
    Dim wks As Worksheet
    For Each wks In ActiveWorkbook.Worksheets
        For Each img In wks.Shapes
            img.Delete
        Next img
    Next wks
End Sub

That's a LOT of images, then. But at least it worked. How was editing the XML faster, though?

# ? Jun 14, 2016 14:35

Siochain: May 24, 2005; "can they get rid of any humans who are fans of shitheads like Kanye West, 50 Cent, or any other piece of crap "artist" who thinks they're all that?

And also get rid of anyone who has posted retarded shit on the internet."

pixaal posted:

Look into working remotely if you can't find something close. If you need more job experience look into working with a long commute for a year or two at a place that will get you what you need to work remote, or will let you work remote after that time period as you will be in a position to.

I'm already working remotely, but I'm really finding it doesn't do me well. I find it incredibly difficult to "leave it at the office", when the office is my house. And I'm in a small town in the rear end-end of nowhere (Northeastern Ontario, Canada) - the wifes a geologist and works at a mine. We're a little remote. I'd likely need to find something where lived elsewhere during the week, and we just couldn't swing me renting an apartment.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 14:50

nielsm: Jun 1, 2009

Arsten posted:

That's a LOT of images, then. But at least it worked. How was editing the XML faster, though?

I already had the file unpacked for examination, and the manual editing was just deleting drawing1.xml and removing a single tag from the sheet xml, which was very fast with a search.

And yes, it was roughly 60,000 shape objects.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 14:55

A Frosty Witch: Apr 21, 2005; I was just looking at it and I suddenly got this urge to get inside. No, not just an urge - more than that. It was my destiny to be here; in the box.

A performance review came in.

I didn't get graded on a lot of stuff because he says I haven't been here long enough for him to accurately gauge how loyal and dedicated I am. But he did grade me highly in everything else, and told me that any critiques he had, I had already covered in my self-appraisal and that I was on the right track. He said I came in at a tough time in the middle of a school year, with no documentation and in the middle of several large projects, but I still managed to keep everything afloat for the rest of the semester.

At the end of the meeting, he stood up and said "It's your department now. Do whatever you want with it. Go hog wild." It made my inner goon chuckle.

Then he held his hand out expectantly, so I gingerly placed my self-appraisal in his waiting palm.

"That's for shaking"

Oh.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 15:02

Wrath of the Bitch King: May 11, 2005; Research confirms that black is a color like silver is a color, and that beyond black is clarity.

Way to earn your Goon wings with the faulty handshake.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 15:21

GreenNight: Feb 19, 2006; Turning the light on the darkest places, you and I know we got to face this now. We got to face this now.

I hope you didn't limp wrist that handshake either.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 15:22

ilkhan: Oct 7, 2004; I LOVE Musk and his pro-first-amendment ways. X is the future.

larchesdanrew posted:

"That's for shaking"

Oh.

Thanks for making my entire day, larches. LOL

# ? Jun 14, 2016 15:30

Siochain: May 24, 2005; "can they get rid of any humans who are fans of shitheads like Kanye West, 50 Cent, or any other piece of crap "artist" who thinks they're all that?

And also get rid of anyone who has posted retarded shit on the internet."

larchesdanrew posted:

A performance review came in.

I didn't get graded on a lot of stuff because he says I haven't been here long enough for him to accurately gauge how loyal and dedicated I am. But he did grade me highly in everything else, and told me that any critiques he had, I had already covered in my self-appraisal and that I was on the right track. He said I came in at a tough time in the middle of a school year, with no documentation and in the middle of several large projects, but I still managed to keep everything afloat for the rest of the semester.

At the end of the meeting, he stood up and said "It's your department now. Do whatever you want with it. Go hog wild." It made my inner goon chuckle.

Then he held his hand out expectantly, so I gingerly placed my self-appraisal in his waiting palm.

"That's for shaking"

Oh.

A) Congrats
B) thanks for the chuckle, it made my lovely day at least somewhat less lovely

# ? Jun 14, 2016 16:29

Trastion: Jul 24, 2003; The one and only.

Anyone have a suggestion for a good server room temp monitor? We have been using an AVTech Room Alert 12E but it failed us for the second time this weekend. We had the AC unit die and by the time I got to the office the server room was 94 degrees. Luckily we only lost a single hard drive in the SAN and no servers were killed.

I am working with AVTech to see why it was reporting good temps even though the temp was way over but we are probably going to dump them. We need something reliable but not super expensive, small shop. The server room is pretty small but has around 20 servers in it along with switches and other IT equipment.

Hopefully this event will also allow us to get approval from the owner for a backup AC unit.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 16:40

A Frosty Witch: Apr 21, 2005; I was just looking at it and I suddenly got this urge to get inside. No, not just an urge - more than that. It was my destiny to be here; in the box.

A goddamn purchase request came in.

The receptionist for one of our departments NEEDS a new computer. Her's is way too slow to do anything. Nevermind she's using the same computer the other office workers use and they're the newest computers we own. Nevermind no one else complaining. It's hers. I've personally checked it and cleaned it up and it's working absolutely fine, but no, it's too slow, she needs a new one. I flat out refuse, saying there's nothing wrong with it. I'm not pulling money out of my nearly nonexistent budget for this poo poo.

Long story short, she went directly to the executive director and threw me under the bus and now I have to have her both a new computer ordered by this afternoon, and a temporary computer in place for her to use that is better than what she has.

I've explained to no end how pointless this whole thing is and that finding an all-in-one computer with Windows 7 and getting her precarious build-out of programs working perfectly will be way more problematic than either of them are anticipating, when we're planning site-wide upgrades within the year, but it has to be done NOW.

So anyone got a suggestion for an all-in-one that I can hopefully just buy off Amazon and get these fuckers off my back?

A Frosty Witch fucked around with this message at 17:23 on Jun 14, 2016

# ? Jun 14, 2016 17:21

LethalGeek: Nov 4, 2009

"Im on a loaner machine and my local files aren't there"

...you don't say!

No we don't have folder redirection, we have a huge rear end document system they should have things in.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 17:21

EoRaptor: Sep 13, 2003; by Fluffdaddy

Trastion posted:

Anyone have a suggestion for a good server room temp monitor? We have been using an AVTech Room Alert 12E but it failed us for the second time this weekend. We had the AC unit die and by the time I got to the office the server room was 94 degrees. Luckily we only lost a single hard drive in the SAN and no servers were killed.

I am working with AVTech to see why it was reporting good temps even though the temp was way over but we are probably going to dump them. We need something reliable but not super expensive, small shop. The server room is pretty small but has around 20 servers in it along with switches and other IT equipment.

Hopefully this event will also allow us to get approval from the owner for a backup AC unit.

I had good luck with a minigoose ii from IT Watchdogs. They don't make that model anymore, and have been bought out by another company, but I'd buy from them again.

http://www.itwatchdogs.com/temp-environment-climate-monitors-c1.html

# ? Jun 14, 2016 17:21

pixaal: Jan 8, 2004; All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

larchesdanrew posted:

A goddamn purchase request came in.

The receptionist for one of our departments NEEDS a new computer. Her's is way too slow to do anything. Nevermind she's using the same computer the other office workers use and they're the newest computers we own. Nevermind no one else complaining. It's hers. I've personally checked it and cleaned it up and it's working absolutely fine, but no, it's too slow, she needs a new one. I flat out refuse, saying there's nothing wrong with it. I'm not pulling money out of my nearly nonexistent budget for this poo poo.

Long story short, she went directly to the executive director and threw me under the bus and now I have to have her both a new computer ordered by this afternoon, and a temporary computer in place for her to use that is better than what she has.

I've explained to no end how pointless this whole thing is and that finding an all-in-one computer with Windows 7 and getting her precarious build-out of programs working perfectly will be way more problematic than either of them are anticipating, when we're planning site-wide upgrades within the year, but it has to be done NOW.

So anyone got a suggestion for an all-in-one that I can hopefully just buy off Amazon and get these fuckers off my back?

Don't buy anything work related from Amazon, especially not a computer. Get it from your vendor, try Dell directly or CDWG, you're with a school right? So I think CDW will just tell you they can't help you and to go to CDWG. Dell all in Ones look pretty good. It'll cost more than tower + monitor but I assume you asked for that because that is what the user needs / wants.

Bonus points if you order an i3 but request an i7 case badge. (Your Dell rep should let you do this, mine always asks what badge I want. I've thought about asking if they still have any AMD64 badges)

# ? Jun 14, 2016 17:26

A Frosty Witch: Apr 21, 2005; I was just looking at it and I suddenly got this urge to get inside. No, not just an urge - more than that. It was my destiny to be here; in the box.

pixaal posted:

Don't buy anything work related from Amazon, especially not a computer. Get it from your vendor, try Dell directly or CDWG, you're with a school right? So I think CDW will just tell you they can't help you and to go to CDWG. Dell all in Ones look pretty good. It'll cost more than tower + monitor but I assume you asked for that because that is what the user needs / wants.

Bonus points if you order an i3 but request an i7 case badge. (Your Dell rep should let you do this, mine always asks what badge I want. I've thought about asking if they still have any AMD64 badges)

I'm in a weird situation where my school purchases everything through the college we share a campus with. And setting up new vendors is a pain in the loving rear end because of all the red tape you have to go through. I attempted to do something with CDWG a while back and by the time the college got back to me telling me they needed a bunch of paperwork, the need for whatever I was buying had passed. Right now, I've got one vendor I could use who will charge out the rear end for whatever and take several days, and Amazon, that I can order from without a bunch of bureaucracy.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 17:30

Japanese Dating Sim: Nov 12, 2003; hehe; Lipstick Apathy

larchesdanrew posted:

So anyone got a suggestion for an all-in-one that I can hopefully just buy off Amazon and get these fuckers off my back?

When I had to set up two kiosk computers I got a couple of Optiplex 7440s. I hate all-in-ones but they're working fine for what they're supposed to do.

They're the newest all-in-one Dell makes though, so it might be more than you're wanting to spend.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 17:35

GreenNight: Feb 19, 2006; Turning the light on the darkest places, you and I know we got to face this now. We got to face this now.

larchesdanrew posted:

I'm in a weird situation where my school purchases everything through the college we share a campus with. And setting up new vendors is a pain in the loving rear end because of all the red tape you have to go through. I attempted to do something with CDWG a while back and by the time the college got back to me telling me they needed a bunch of paperwork, the need for whatever I was buying had passed. Right now, I've got one vendor I could use who will charge out the rear end for whatever and take several days, and Amazon, that I can order from without a bunch of bureaucracy.

Make sure you get the approval in writing. Something like

"The computer she has is about $1800 new, which is current gen. To replace I need to spend about $2500. Please approve so I can go forward". Then get yourself a new PC and give her "something new" that you cobbled together because she probably won't notice a loving difference.

Then if you get bitched at you have a paper trail.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 17:37

odiv: Jan 12, 2003

Does she already have an SSD? If not, try that? That should make things pretty loving zippy, right?

# ? Jun 14, 2016 17:41

Trastion: Jul 24, 2003; The one and only.

EoRaptor posted:

I had good luck with a minigoose ii from IT Watchdogs. They don't make that model anymore, and have been bought out by another company, but I'd buy from them again.
http://www.itwatchdogs.com/temp-environment-climate-monitors-c1.html

My boss was looking at the IT Watchdogs 1000 because it is on sale right now. But I noticed it is on sale because they are EOLing it but supporting it for 3 years...

Edit: I second the SSD part and maybe more RAM if you can fit any more/large sticks.

Trastion fucked around with this message at 17:47 on Jun 14, 2016

# ? Jun 14, 2016 17:45

spankmeister: Jun 15, 2008

odiv posted:

Does she already have an SSD? If not, try that? That should make things pretty loving zippy, right?

Yeah. Here's what you do:

1) buy and install an SSD
2) double the RAM
3) most important, buy a cheap, but flashy looking case and transplant the parts to it

# ? Jun 14, 2016 17:48

AlexDeGruven: Jun 29, 2007; Watch me pull my dongle out of this tiny box

pixaal posted:

Bonus points if you order an i3 but request an i7 case badge. (Your Dell rep should let you do this, mine always asks what badge I want. I've thought about asking if they still have any AMD64 badges)

This is hilarious and BOFH as gently caress. I love it.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 17:51

Japanese Dating Sim: Nov 12, 2003; hehe; Lipstick Apathy

Someone out there needs to sell i9 processor case badges. I would pay (a small amount) of money for them.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 17:53

chin up everything sucks: Jan 29, 2012

larchesdanrew posted:

A goddamn purchase request came in.

The receptionist for one of our departments NEEDS a new computer. Her's is way too slow to do anything. Nevermind she's using the same computer the other office workers use and they're the newest computers we own. Nevermind no one else complaining. It's hers. I've personally checked it and cleaned it up and it's working absolutely fine, but no, it's too slow, she needs a new one. I flat out refuse, saying there's nothing wrong with it. I'm not pulling money out of my nearly nonexistent budget for this poo poo.

Long story short, she went directly to the executive director and threw me under the bus and now I have to have her both a new computer ordered by this afternoon, and a temporary computer in place for her to use that is better than what she has.

I've explained to no end how pointless this whole thing is and that finding an all-in-one computer with Windows 7 and getting her precarious build-out of programs working perfectly will be way more problematic than either of them are anticipating, when we're planning site-wide upgrades within the year, but it has to be done NOW.

So anyone got a suggestion for an all-in-one that I can hopefully just buy off Amazon and get these fuckers off my back?

Stand up and throw her back under the bus for attempting to waste valuable time and money that the school doesn't have, for a problem that's not related to her computer but to whatever poo poo she is running in the background while working. Or maybe it's just poo poo ancient software that can't run fast. The executive director shouldn't be overruling you on something that he has no understanding of, unless he wants it coming out of his own budget.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 18:01

GnarlyCharlie4u: Sep 23, 2007; I have an unhealthy obsession with motorcycles.

Proof

pixaal posted:

Bonus points if you order an i3 but request an i7 case badge. (Your Dell rep should let you do this, mine always asks what badge I want. I've thought about asking if they still have any AMD64 badges)

This is loving BEAUTIFUL.
Buy her a Surface Pro 4 to work on for her 'loaner.'

Do the needful and return her 'new' computer to her in a matter of days, just as she's starting to fall in love with the Surface.
Be sure to make eye contact as you crush her dreams and take back the SP4.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 18:01

BOOTY-ADE: Aug 30, 2006; BIG KOOL TELLIN' Y'ALL TO KEEP IT TIGHT

odiv posted:

Does she already have an SSD? If not, try that? That should make things pretty loving zippy, right?

I'd probe first to see exactly what is so slow on the PC - usually someone blames the PC for a problem that's completely unrelated. Slow internet? Must be the PC, can't possibly be an internet or browser problem, REPLACE MY COMPUTER THINGY PLEBE

# ? Jun 14, 2016 18:25

Zamboni Apocalypse: Dec 29, 2009

larchesdanrew posted:

A performance review came in.

I didn't get graded on a lot of stuff because he says I haven't been here long enough for him to accurately gauge how loyal and dedicated I am. But he did grade me highly in everything else, and told me that any critiques he had, I had already covered in my self-appraisal and that I was on the right track. He said I came in at a tough time in the middle of a school year, with no documentation and in the middle of several large projects, but I still managed to keep everything afloat for the rest of the semester.

At the end of the meeting, he stood up and said "It's your department now. Do whatever you want with it. Go hog wild." It made my inner goon chuckle.

Then he held his hand out expectantly, so I gingerly placed my self-appraisal in his waiting palm.

"That's for shaking"

Oh.

Yay!

And now, the eagerly anticipated...

larchesdanrew posted:

More tomorrow possibly about how CE's cousin broke into the station and showed everyone his dick.

(Or did I just miss it somehow?)

# ? Jun 14, 2016 18:32

Bigass Moth: Mar 6, 2004; I joined the #RXT REVOLUTION.

he knows...

That receptionist just wants a mac book.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 18:47

anthonypants: May 6, 2007; by Nyc_Tattoo; Dinosaur Gum

I sent a ticket to one of our datacenters to find out what DNS servers they use and it took like a dozen emails. I probably should have called them instead.

Reply #1 and #2: (Automated system) We got your ticket
#3: (Remote hands guy) Can the command center help with this request
#4: (Automated system) This ticket is updated
#5: (Command center guy) Yes
#6: (Remote hands guy) Thanks
#7: (Command center guy) We use Google DNS
#8: (Automated system) This ticket is updated
#9: (Command center guy) I'm done you can close the ticket
#10: (Automated system) This ticket is updated
#11: (Automated system) This ticket is closed

# ? Jun 14, 2016 18:54

Dr. Arbitrary: Mar 15, 2006; Bleak Gremlin

larchesdanrew posted:

Hers is way too slow to do anything.

We're you able to observe it being slow? I know I've been filled before when everything worked fine until the user did something specific and it all went to hell for about 5 minutes.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 19:24

Volmarias: Dec 31, 2002; EMAIL... THE INTERNET... SEARCH ENGINES...

larchesdanrew posted:

"It's your department now. Do whatever you want with it. Go hog wild."

larchesdanrew posted:

Long story short, she went directly to the executive director and threw me under the bus and now I have to have her both a new computer ordered by this afternoon, and a temporary computer in place for her to use that is better than what she has.

So what you're saying is that you still have all of the responsibility with none of the authority.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 19:34

mewse: May 2, 2006

larchesdanrew posted:

Then he held his hand out expectantly, so I gingerly placed my self-appraisal in his waiting palm.

"That's for shaking"

Oh.

Interesting variation on the White Guy Hand Shake

# ? Jun 14, 2016 19:38

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

Trastion posted:

Anyone have a suggestion for a good server room temp monitor? We have been using an AVTech Room Alert 12E but it failed us for the second time this weekend. We had the AC unit die and by the time I got to the office the server room was 94 degrees. Luckily we only lost a single hard drive in the SAN and no servers were killed.

I am working with AVTech to see why it was reporting good temps even though the temp was way over but we are probably going to dump them. We need something reliable but not super expensive, small shop. The server room is pretty small but has around 20 servers in it along with switches and other IT equipment.

Hopefully this event will also allow us to get approval from the owner for a backup AC unit.

The Geist stuff is good. Get the PoE versions.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 20:01

A Frosty Witch: Apr 21, 2005; I was just looking at it and I suddenly got this urge to get inside. No, not just an urge - more than that. It was my destiny to be here; in the box.

I ended up going with our usual charge-out-the-rear end vendor. When they found out I was in the market for $10k worth of Chromebooks, with a few extra computers and SMART Board maintenance thrown in, they rolled out the goddamn VIP carpet. I basically told the director where he could stick his "this afternoon" deadline, because I'm not doing the CE thing of driving down to Office Depot and buying whatever is cheapest.

Volmarias posted:

So what you're saying is that you still have all of the responsibility with none of the authority.

Dr. Arbitrary posted:

We're you able to observe it being slow? I know I've been filled before when everything worked fine until the user did something specific and it all went to hell for about 5 minutes.

It seemed fine to me, but apparently my opinion means bupkiss compared to the incomparable computer knowledge of a 56 year old Luddite.

FireSight posted:

The executive director shouldn't be overruling you on something that he has no understanding of, unless he wants it coming out of his own budget.

I stood up on this one. I told him that this was a completely optional computer replacement and, therefore, did not fall under my financial jurisdiction. I previously got, in writing, confirmation from him that any technology purchases that could not be deemed necessary for productivity would be the sole financial burden of the requesting department and I'm really loving glad I did that, because I've had to bring that particular agreement up a lot.

quote:

CE's cousin's dick story

Oh poo poo, I forgot about this. Give me a few.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 20:02

ChubbyThePhat: Dec 22, 2006; Who nico nico needs anyone else

# ? Jun 14, 2016 20:04

Danith: May 20, 2006; I've lurked here for years

DEV environment goes down, can't RDP into it. Send email to the hosting company. They bring it up 3 hours later and I check the logs.

Looks like their citrix web thing brought it down so it wasn't us.

Ask them if they know why it went down and they say we never renewed the environment and shut it off.

Guess I shouldn't have asked :frog:

# ? Jun 14, 2016 20:11

Dr. Arbitrary: Mar 15, 2006; Bleak Gremlin

larchesdanrew posted:

I stood up on this one. I told him that this was a completely optional computer replacement and, therefore, did not fall under my financial jurisdiction. I previously got, in writing, confirmation from him that any technology purchases that could not be deemed necessary for productivity would be the sole financial burden of the requesting department

Oh. Well, what's the problem then? If they want to use their budget to buy stupid stuff that's their problem.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 20:17

GreenNight: Feb 19, 2006; Turning the light on the darkest places, you and I know we got to face this now. We got to face this now.

Dr. Arbitrary posted:

Oh. Well, what's the problem then? If they want to use their budget to buy stupid stuff that's their problem.

Other than his time setting up stupid stuff.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 20:23

Mo_Steel: Mar 7, 2008; Let's Clock Into The Sunset Together; Fun Shoe

GreenNight posted:

Other than his time setting up stupid stuff.

Yeah, there's something to be said for having a consistent hardware environment as well. It makes troubleshooting and sourcing replacements a lot more straightforward.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 20:40

Alighieri: Dec 10, 2005

A ticket came in: Liveperson updated the javascript tracking for our pages and I was not notified until a boss asked today why sales were not seeing liveperson sessions and could this email from them he got a few weeks ago be related to it.

It is fixed now, have fun sales.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 20:50

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# ? Jun 1, 2024 15:23

Agrikk: Oct 17, 2003; Take care with that! We have not fully ascertained its function, and the ticking is accelerating.

EoRaptor posted:

I had good luck with a minigoose ii from IT Watchdogs. They don't make that model anymore, and have been bought out by another company, but I'd buy from them again.
http://www.itwatchdogs.com/temp-environment-climate-monitors-c1.html

Seconding these guys. I think I had a micro goose from them: PoE and snmp monitoring made server room temp monitors a cinch.

# ? Jun 14, 2016 21:14

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > RE: A ticket came in: Did they take the printer into the shitters with them?

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