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The only god i believe in is general john s pershing and the human vagina
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Jul 25, 2016 10:33
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I forgot how to kneel and when to stand or genuflect. Thank goodness.
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Jul 25, 2016 10:33
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alllah 'akbar , fa'innah min almunasib 'ann alththana' ealayh . tabarak asm alllah . yajuz lah 'an yaghfir li khitayay . alhamd kanisatuh ! الله أكبر، فإنه من المناسب أن الثناء عليه. تبارك اسم الله. يجوز له أن يغفر لي خطاياي. الحمد كنيسته! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Wo00EgsT6Y
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Jul 25, 2016 11:00
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Booblord Zagats posted:Saints aren't idolatry, they're just God's version of delegation of authority. If Saints aren't idolatry than neither is Haitian voodoo, Yoruba religion or Dogon religion. 
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Jul 25, 2016 11:41
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I have lived basically my whole life with my church overlooking my house; I walked up to k-8th Catholic School and luckily in retrospect it wasn't really that bad, our priests were always good and decent people. Except for one priest who hated being in a church that also had a school because he hated children and had an obsession with using that incense no one liked. School was good mainly because most of the teachers weren't nuns or priests; I felt bad for them honestly because my class was really lovely, the high point being when they ran out a teacher by being assholes and then tried bragging about it in the 8th grade yearbook. Being Catholic owns if you like being religious but not an idiot about science, fish fries, parish festivals, earning/buying your way to paradise by doing good works, getting to confess your sins, and masses that are only an hour long and you can easily daydream or look at the statues and artwork of saints. I don't know how those Protestants do it with their boring rear end simple buildings
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Jul 25, 2016 13:15
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ANIME IS BLOOD posted:I'm rock hard ur a coprolith
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Jul 25, 2016 13:43
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achillesforever6 posted:Being Catholic owns if you like being religious but not an idiot about science, fish fries, parish festivals, earning/buying your way to paradise by doing good works, getting to confess your sins, and masses that are only an hour long and you can easily daydream or look at the statues and artwork of saints. I don't know how those Protestants do it with their boring rear end simple buildings When it came to sex talk week for 6th through 8th grades and I am not kidding there was an old nun who said that gay men use Crisco to fist other men. She was escorted off the stage.
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Jul 25, 2016 14:15
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achillesforever6 posted:and masses that are only an hour long and you can easily daydream or look at the statues and artwork of saints. I don't know how those Protestants do it with their boring rear end simple buildings
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Jul 25, 2016 14:26
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KiteAuraan posted:If Saints aren't idolatry than neither is Haitian voodoo, Yoruba religion or Dogon religion. Agreed. Voodoo is legit
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Jul 25, 2016 14:34
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Zeluth posted:When it came to sex talk week for 6th through 8th grades and I am not kidding there was an old nun who said that gay men use Crisco to fist other men. She was escorted off the stage. Stage? Your sex ed was in musical form or something?
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Jul 25, 2016 14:35
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achillesforever6 posted:
We had a priest that was a big fan of the NY Giants, so during football season he kept mass to right around 35 minutes by only having on hymn, a quick reading/sermon from a Psalm and a herculean effort to speed up communion by having all the wine and wafers pre made and handed out down the aisles instead of having people come up to get them. If you had a donation you just dropped it in the box on the way out.
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Jul 25, 2016 14:38
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unitarians take the summer off from church
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Jul 25, 2016 16:17
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Luvcow posted:unitarians take the summer off from church
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Jul 25, 2016 16:20
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Luvcow posted:unitarians take the summer off from church Less church is almost always a good call. My dad would take us just once or twice a month, and never on the weeks of Christmas, Easter or Good Friday because the place was always packed and it was always the same sermon
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Jul 25, 2016 16:24
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jBrereton posted:Practical and theologically valid to enjoy the works of god rather than the sermons of man imo. a nice hold over from the days of no AC and a real need to be working your fields/farms/etc. Booblord Zagats posted:Less church is almost always a good call. My dad would take us just once or twice a month, and never on the weeks of Christmas, Easter or Good Friday because the place was always packed and it was always the same sermon i go once or twice a year (christmas eve and easter) and the congregation is like 4 or 5 times the normal size at those times but it's cool to see people you'd never really see otherwise, plus the whole UU thing is more about community than religion
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Jul 25, 2016 16:30
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Luvcow posted:i go once or twice a year (christmas eve and easter) and the congregation is like 4 or 5 times the normal size at those times but it's cool to see people you'd never really see otherwise, plus the whole UU thing is more about community than religion I get that, to be honest I haven't gone to mass since 2004 , but I totally understand why people choose to aside from Catholic guilt, I remember a good many nice Sundays as a kid with my family going to church, going to breakfast and then coming home to enjoy a peaceful day
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Jul 25, 2016 16:42
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Booblord Zagats posted:We had a priest that was a big fan of the NY Giants, so during football season he kept mass to right around 35 minutes by only having on hymn, a quick reading/sermon from a Psalm and a herculean effort to speed up communion by having all the wine and wafers pre made and handed out down the aisles instead of having people come up to get them. If you had a donation you just dropped it in the box on the way out. ahahahahaha when the Panthers played the Cowboys in the playoffs in 1996, Father Ed just went on a 25 minute rant about what a piece of poo poo Michael Irvin was.
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Jul 25, 2016 16:44
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Jerry Cotton posted:Stage? Your sex ed was in musical form or something? Our gymnasium/stage ceiling was falling apart and I am pretty sure there was asbestos up there. Zeluth fucked around with this message at 16:55 on Jul 25, 2016 |
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Jul 25, 2016 16:52
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FizFashizzle posted:ahahahahaha I wish I still was in contact with that guy, I'd want him in my fantasy football league
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Jul 25, 2016 16:55
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question to the catholics: Can i be a catholic without really caring at all for nor performing saint intercession during prayers & also having a healthy disdain for the practice of decorating dead saints and the associated relics
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Jul 25, 2016 17:50
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Check out Adrian VI over here ^^^^
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Jul 25, 2016 17:53
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hemophilia posted:question to the catholics: Can i be a catholic without really caring at all for nor performing saint intercession during prayers & also having a healthy disdain for the practice of decorating dead saints and the associated relics That exact sentiment is practically a requirement to become clergy
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Jul 25, 2016 18:01
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Booblord Zagats posted:That exact sentiment is practically a requirement to become clergy if i see celibacy dropped as a requirement in my lifetime that's good to know
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Jul 25, 2016 18:05
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hemophilia posted:question to the catholics: Can i be a catholic without really caring at all for nor performing saint intercession during prayers & also having a healthy disdain for the practice of decorating dead saints and the associated relics It takes you out if the running for Catholic Grandma though
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Jul 25, 2016 18:11
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hemophilia posted:question to the catholics: Can i be a catholic without really caring at all for nor performing saint intercession during prayers & also having a healthy disdain for the practice of decorating dead saints and the associated relics Growing up Catholic usually means you are presently atheist.
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Jul 25, 2016 18:11
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Zeluth posted:Growing up Catholic usually means you are presently atheist. I grew up atheist and am presently christian 
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Jul 25, 2016 18:12
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hemophilia posted:I grew up atheist and am presently christian poseur
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Jul 25, 2016 18:16
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Zeluth posted:Growing up Catholic usually means you are presently atheist. I'd argue that Catholicism and Methodist teachings lead to agnosticism. Baptists, Evangelicals and that ilk seem to face more toward atheist as they get older
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Jul 25, 2016 18:16
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Booblord Zagats posted:I'd argue that Catholicism and Methodist teachings lead to agnosticism. Baptists, Evangelicals and that ilk seem to face more toward atheist as they get older I can't speak to baptists specifically, i've been to a baptist church maybe once, but evangelical churches of many flavors do produce atheists. Around 18 either kids double down and go crazy hardliner right wing political activism 100% committed to being a nazi in God's name or they reject faith entirely. It's really hard to just have faith and not be a shithead about it apparently
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Jul 25, 2016 18:20
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hemophilia posted:I can't speak to baptists specifically, i've been to a baptist church maybe once, but evangelical churches of many flavors do produce atheists. Around 18 either kids double down and go crazy hardliner right wing political activism 100% committed to being a nazi in God's name or they reject faith entirely. The worst are the Baptists/Gels who go atheist, then pendulum back to their faith after a crippling mid-life crisis that alienates them from their spouses, children and friends and sends them back in to the arms of their lovely family they left decades ago for being horrible people without realizing that all they're doing is continuing the same lovely cycle all in the name of Jesus because they can't seem to cope with their own mortality it's like watching someone who just had a health scare become super vegan and straight edge and trying to convert everyone because they think we've all made the same dumb choices they have
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Jul 25, 2016 18:46
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hemophilia posted:I can't speak to baptists specifically, i've been to a baptist church maybe once, but evangelical churches of many flavors do produce atheists. Around 18 either kids double down and go crazy hardliner right wing political activism 100% committed to being a nazi in God's name or they reject faith entirely. We're such a loving stupid, adversarial species that you can get people to buy in 100% on a 'thou shalt not kill' commandment, and then see the same people go to war and kill others over just how that ought to be interpreted.
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Jul 25, 2016 18:46
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Nathilus posted:You know that the catholics are lying and that the pope isn't really magic, right? He doesn't get to just snap his fingers and make waterfalls/institutional inertia start flowing backwards. this is blasphemy
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Jul 25, 2016 18:48
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5er posted:We're such a loving stupid, adversarial species that you can get people to buy in 100% on a 'thou shalt not kill' commandment, and then see the same people go to war and kill others over just how that ought to be interpreted. Yeah the human race deserves obliteration, which is why i am so thankful for Christ's sacrifice.
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Jul 25, 2016 19:03
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I always liked telling sola scriptura protestants that if they cared about the Bible they should be Catholic or Greek orthodox.
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Jul 25, 2016 19:18
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Booblord Zagats posted:I always liked telling sola scriptura protestants that if they cared about the Bible they should be Catholic or Greek orthodox. ive never heard the term sola scriptura although im overly familliar with the doctrine. what's actually a good case against it
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Jul 25, 2016 19:22
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Moridin920 posted:this is blasphemy By religious standards I'm guilty of far worse. I reject the existence of hell for instance, which is some pretty hardcore heresy. Oh also I reject the divinity of christ (all humans are equally gifted with the spark) so I'm even worse than a blaspheming heretic, I'm literally a nonbeliever. If catholics are right about afterlife stuff I am loving boned. No amount of saint karma would save me from the trapdoor. But their poo poo is made up so I'm not scared.
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Jul 25, 2016 19:47
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Nah Catholics are cool as hell about the afterlife. Even if you're a nonbeliever as long as you weren't a total poo poo rear end you get to go to purgatory, which is probably really chill and laid back. It'd be like getting banned but instead of spider cock you're sent to byob
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Jul 25, 2016 19:50
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hemophilia posted:Yeah the human race deserves obliteration, which is why i am so thankful for Christ's sacrifice. Jesus killed himself so he didn't have to look at us anymore.
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Jul 25, 2016 21:41
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i hope everyone dies
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Jul 25, 2016 22:02
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hemophilia posted:ive never heard the term sola scriptura although im overly familliar with the doctrine. drat it. I haven't done research on textual criticism for a while, so some of my memories are a bit sloppy. One of the best cases is tied into my prior rambling about Genesis. That the entire bible, and the stories in it, were both written by men in different periods, and have been copied and recopied, translated and retranslated, and edited to suit the times by scribes and monks over the entirety of it's existence. The New Testament contains entire parables that were not in the earlier transcripts, and all the endless transcripts are filled with differences. Even the oldest transcripts of the new testament we have are from decades or even centuries after they were first penned. Exacerbating the issue for the new testament in particular is that for the first several hundred years, it had not developed the professional transcribers and translators that were monks and scribes. In fact, many of the early transcribers were almost illiterate, and were copying letter by letter without knowing their meaning. Thus, there was a massive issue of mistranslations early on in particular. Because of this, the Catholics argued against the early protestants basing religion around the bible alone, since even if it could be said that the bible was the word of god when written, it had been so corrupted that it could not be relied upon alone any longer, and required the apostolic tradition of the church to follow properly. Of course, this led to the argument that god made sure the salient bits of the bible remained intact over time. But I think that is still the best argument. The history of the bible, and the fact that we don't have the 'original' bible, if such a term even has any meaning. Even Origen, in penning Contra Celsum in the 3rd century, admitted that there were countless variations of holy texts, and while in that piece he claimed that accurate ones could still be found, in private correspondence he complained that he could hardly find two transcripts that were identical. To keep this from being too boring, here is a page from the Codex Vatinicus, from around 300 AD. See that little note in the margin half way down between columns 1 and 2? It is a monk chewing out another for mussing about with the wording, and reads "Fool and knave, leave the old reading and do not change it!" Tiberius Thyben fucked around with this message at 22:41 on Jul 25, 2016 |
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Jul 25, 2016 22:18
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