Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

That one sounds like flamebait to me, it's a little too on-the-nose. Should have gone all the way and had the brother bugger the boyfriend at the end.

vyst posted:

Realchat, if you have a small dick just get really good with your mouth and your hand. Also offer to pleasure her with a magic wand. If she's that hung up on dick size she's probably a bitch and has a cavernous vagina.

vyst posted:

I'm 4'11" and I have a 2" cock but it's 8" in girth. It looks like a P switch from the video game Mario.

Business Gorillas posted:

Is it blue too?

DOOP posted:

I wish I had a bigger/thicker dick

quote:

Am I (28F) a horrible person for giving me 450 lb husband (31M) of three years an ultimatum about his weight?
submitted 8 months ago by 450lbthrowthisaway

Title pretty much explains it all. Some details may have been altered for privacy's sake. Sorry for the typo in the title but I can't edit it.

When my husband and I first got together, he was already overweight. I knew this going into the relationship. However, he had expressed a strong desire to lose weight plus I really loved him so things just continued from there. I have always tried to be supportive and encouraging, inviting him with me when I go work out, buying healthy choices from the grocery store, etc. He rejects my offers and buys himself Taco Bell or whatever fast food is closest whenever he can.

Predictably, none of this has had any effect. He has gained 70 lbs in the past 2 years alone.

The last thing I want to do is come home some day when we're in our 40's or 50's to find him dead, lying on the floor of a heart attack. This is my fear. Everyday I see him eating enormous portions, choosing candy and coke over healthier options. Everyday I see him so inactive that he gets edema in his ankles and feet from sitting still so long staring at a screen. It kills me to see this and he might as well be doing meth or straight up drinking poison. Either way he is killing his body.

Our sex life is.. incredibly lackluster. We've only been able to have sex in one position, ever. I'm bored and want to do something else, anything else. Due to his weight gain, he can't even fit all the way inside me anymore. Unsatisfied doesn't even begin to describe how I feel.

I know my vows included the usual "through sickness and health" and "til death do us part", yadda yadda, so I feel as though I should just continue keeping on. But at the same time, I feel so unhappy in this marriage. He hasn't taken anything I've said seriously and I've had several people suggest that I get more serious about it. The only thing I can think of is an ultimatum: lose weight or you'll lose me.

Am I being a horrible person? Am I too harsh? I don't even know. He can be very emotionally manipulative and I'm sure he'll hit me with an enormous guilt trip so I have no idea how I'll stay true to my word.

What would you do if you were me?

tl;dr: Husband is very obese and continues to gain weight with no sign of changing despite my attempts at being supportive. Maybe an ultimatum will finally be what motivates him but I don't know if it's the best idea.

quote:

While my boyfriend [24M] was away for four months, I [24F] got in shape, ate better, and lost weight. Now he's upset because my breasts shrunk
submitted 6 months ago by boobsgotsmaller

My boyfriend Clark and I have been together for almost 1.5 years. For the last four months he was away on a project for work. During this time, I decided to finally get back in shape and eat better. I lost 27 pounds.

Before this, I was a D cup. Clark always really liked my breasts, saying they were the "perfect size". It was a nice compliment, but whatever. Now I'm down to a B cup because guess whats in your breasts? Fat.

He's actually upset enough about this to point it out multiple times. Just small comments like "Aww, I miss what they used to be" and stuff like that. He also in general makes comments about my old size, and how pretty I was, blah blah. He hasn't even said one positive thing about my weight loss, or how much more tone and healthy I am.

I've told him to stop multiple times, and he just kind of laughs it off. But he hasn't really stopped and I am at the end of my rope. I think that he very seriously wants me to gain the weight back.

tl;dr: Lost 27 pounds while my boyfriend was away. He hasnt said one positive thing about my weight loss, only that he misses my old boobs (which have shrunk two cup sizes). Its infuriating.

quote:

Me 25 M with my girlfriend (24 F) 2 years- She's gained a lot of weight, I'm struggling to still be attracted to her and her eating habits are sending me broke.

Hi everyone.

I've been with my girlfriend for two years, and we've rented a place together for a little over a year.

We met through a mutual friend and hit it off right away. We have a lot of shared interests and I thought she was gorgeous. Not particularly slim, maybe just bigger than average/bordering on chubby and carrying it very well.

However, since we got together she has gained about 35kg (77lb)

It was a slow creep at first. I didn't really notice and when she started complaining that her clothes weren't fitting I though she looked fine. But soon after that she really ballooned up, mostly in the year that we've lived together. It's started to become a problem, because whilst I still really care for her I no longer find her attractive.

I've tried suggesting exercising together, trying healthier foods etc. whenever I do she becomes very defensive. She insists that she's healthy and exercises every day and gets upset. Last time I tried to discuss it she really went off- said I was being shallow and started crying, so I once again dropped it. I'm at a loss with how to address this problem without ending the relationship.

Before we moved in together I didn't have as much exposure to her eating habits. I thought she ate fairly normally, but it turns out that isn't the case. Which brings me to the more immediate problem.

Because of the nature of my work hours, I'm generally not away from work at times that the grocery store is open. Excepting a couple of days a fortnight which I try to spend doing more enjoyable things and catching up on sleep, for that reason she does most of the good shopping - we split the bill down the middle but she is the one who physically goes to the store.

Initially, I would give her my half of the budgeted amount ($100 each for the fortnight) and if it went slightly over or under we would sort it out, and if she had to go back over the fortnight to get additional things (fresh veg, special ingredients for a meal etc) I would pay half of that too. It worked and was fair and it never went over about $150 a fortnight each.

In the last 6 months or so this has changed. She will still take my money to do the grocery shopping, but is now constantly going over our budgeted amount by quite a bit, and I'm not seeing much of the food (I know she is still buying it, I see the receipts)

She will do the big shop, but most of the food will be gone in three or for days. She works but is home much more often than me and it seems that she is just eating large amounts of our food when in at work. There have been quite a few days where I have come home and there hasn't been anything I can eat for dinner, so I've had to go back out and buy myself something.

She's purchasing a lot more snacks and convenience meals instead of the fresh stuff I prefer too, I spoke to her about that and asked her to go back to buying more fresh meat and vegetables, but even when she has done so I come home to find that she has cooked and eaten it during the day and not left any for me. Not long ago I came home to find that an entire tray of 20 chicken drumsticks and a whole load of bread that had been brought the day before were gone.

I have tried to subtly bring it up with her before and she has just said that groceries are getting more expensive, and that I can't expect her not to eat during the day. I told her I didn't expect that but maybe she should start buying her own snacks separately or cutting down on the volume of food that she eats but she has insisted that it's normal and that I just don't understand how expensive groceries are.

I know that food shopping is expensive sometimes but as I've said I see the receipts. There's enough food being brought but I'm not seeing any of it. I don't earn a bad wage but I have a lot of other expenses and am trying to save for the future. I can't afford to keep shelling out all this extra money. At this point I'm paying out around twice my budgeted amount ($300+ a fortnight) and on top of that she's always asking me to bring home take aways.

I'm at the end of my rope, and I'm considering just saying that I'll be buying my own groceries from now on, and if her weight gain and behaviour continues- leaving her. I don't want to do that, I love her and everything else about her is great, but health and living a long active life are important to me, and I'm simply not attracted to her the way she is now.

Does anyone have any solutions or methods for dealing with this?

tl;dr: My girlfriend has gained a lot of weight and our food bill has doubled. I can't afford it anymore, am losing my attraction to her and am considering leaving. Help/advice appreciated.

quote:

The fiance [30sM] of my best friend [29F] wants me [29F] to stop calling her the nickname I gave her. I don't know how to diplomatically tell him no.Non-Romantic

submitted 1 day ago * by DandCeese

So there's me [29F], my best friend [29F], and her fiance [30sM]. They just got engaged last week. I'm going to be her maid of honor. Yay!
Her fiance is fine. We're not BFFs or anything, but he's cool. He's kind of a socially awkward nerd, and it's hard to get him to open up without bringing up what he's most interested in (what he does for a living, whatever TV show he's watching) and then the conversation with him can get a little one-sided.
My best friend and I have been friends since we were 15. Five-ish years ago (before my best friend started dating her fiance), she and I watched The Wire together. We both now consider it our favorite show.

Anyway, after watching that show, I started calling her, 'D' as a nickname, because, well, her name starts with D, and also, there's a character we both liked who was also called 'D.' I almost exclusively call her by her nickname now.

(WARNING. There's a spoiler for the Wire in the following paragraph, so if you haven't seen it yet, don't keep reading!)

I got this very unexpected message from her fiance last night on Facebook. He told me that now that he and D are getting married, he kindly requests that I stop calling her by the nickname I gave her, as it's "not a very mature way of addressing her. I would hate to think you calling her that during your speech at our wedding." He also went on to say that he never approved of that nickname anyway, because the character gets murdered in the show and he "doesn't like that imagery associated with my future wife."

I'm not the most diplomatic person, so I don't entirely know to respond. I'm not even entirely sure if I should say anything at all. There's, hahaha, also part of me that wants to send back, "Sure, no problem, bro. I'll just start calling her Bodie instead. Or maybe Omar. Oh, I know, I'll start calling her Snoop! Snoop would be a great fit for her!" A similar part of me wants to agree with him, and then during their wedding, just use her nickname constantly during my speech. And there's another (admittedly, angrier) part of me that wants to say, "What? Are you kidding me? No. Request denied. Oh, and gently caress you. Don't ever dictate to me how I should interact with my best friend."

There's also this weird...possessiveness associated with his wording the message. He never calls her by her name, just a lot of "my future wife" and "my fiance." My best friend is fiercely independent, and I know she wouldn't appreciate being talked about like that. So maybe I should forward the message on to her saying something like, "Hey...your fiance just sent this to me and I don't really know what to make of it."

EDIT FOR AN IMPORTANT DETAIL THAT I FORGOT TO ADD: My best friend and I are both bisexual, and we have made out in the past. Just made out. A good handful of times in high school (we were like, "We need to practice for our future boyfriends!" but now that we're older, we laugh about all that now and are like, "Right. Yeah. 'Boyfriends.' Sure. Uh huh.") and, I dunno, four or five times in college (while drunk at parties).

We had talked about dating each other, but, I dunno...we love each other, but I don't think we would ever be in love with each other. We're pretty different people, which is why I think we make such good friends, but not terribly good significant others. The last time we talked about being in a relationship was, like, I dunno, 8 years ago?

It's now only just occurring to me that maybe this has something to do with her fiance's unexpected message...
Any advice would be appreciative. Thanks, y'all.

tl;dr: My best friend's fiance has asked me to stop calling her a nickname I gave her before the two of them even started dating. I don't know how to kindly tell him to shove it.

UPDATE: Well! I just got off the phone with D. She called me, I started to answer like I usually do, ("'Sup, D?") But then, remembering that maybe she doesn't want to be called that anymore, I just sort of awkwardly extended the 'D' sound into her full name (so I answered like, "'Sup Deeeeeeeee[full name]?")
She immediately said, "[Fiance] told you to stop calling me D, didn't he?"
I said yes, and she exclaimed, "What the gently caress, I can't believe he actually loving did that! Look, I gotta go, I'll talk to you later. And don't stop calling me D."
"You got it, D."
We said our goodbyes and she hung up. Soooooooo...I think someone mighta crossed a line...
UPDATE 2: I just tried to post an update, but it was immediately deleted because this post is still on the front page. Long story short, D's fiance crossed a line, they got into the most ridiculous fight, and she is at my place right now. Not entirely sure when (or if) she's going to go back home. I'll post a proper update as soon as this one is no longer on the front page.

Moridin920 posted:

lol forever at people who get married that really shouldn't be

vyst posted:

I'm 4'11" and I have a 2" cock but it's 8" in girth. It looks like a P switch from the video game Mario.

Frog Act posted:

i've wondered sometimes, is it "chode" or "choad" or are both valid regional spellings?

Stabbatical posted:

Moridin920 posted:

lol forever at people who get married that really shouldn't be

Panch posted:

If that one guy doesn't stop saying fortnight I'm going to go binge eat all the food in my kitchen just like his girlfriend and hope the pain stops.

Is that dude budgeting in fortnight periods? What the gently caress.

Edit: okay so I didn't know that was two weeks but even still who the poo poo says that.

Zo posted:

"Fortnight" is still shorter than "every two weeks" so i support using it as much as possible.

kaschei posted:

No need to nitpick over "fortnight" when he uses "whilst"

Lutha Mahtin posted:

D is one of the best characters from The Wire. WTF is that guy's problem?

loquacius posted:

If people manage to get their hands on a narrative that casts them as the victim somehow (in this case defining polyamory as a sexual orientation that simply cannot be denied and your partner is abusive for keeping you in the closet by insisting you not cheat on them) they really can justify anything they want huh

Tricky D posted:

I'm a little behind on the thread, but just wanted to say that it's pretty dumb and self defeating to try to claim polyamory is a sexual orientation and that your partner is somehow abusive for not sharing it. Why would anyone pursue a relationship with someone who obviously doesn't share their orientation? Is an openly gay man who refuses the advances of a confused, lovelorn woman also abusive? It appears that the concept is 110% bullshit.

quote:

After my classes I like to watch some anime in my dorm every so often. I finished up an episode when my gf texted me asking if I was watching anime, to which I replied yes. She then told me that she thinks that now I'm over 20 years old it's time to give up watching it. I kind of laughed it off telling her that I enjoyed it but then she said that she was being really serious. I haven't responded yet and am dreaded when I see her later.

A lot of my hobbies are rooted in anime; my friends, going to conventions, cosplay, merchandise I like etc. and she's known about my hobbies since just a little after we started dating which is why this feels so out of left field for me. I watch about 8-10 series a season which translates to only 1-2 episodes a day. This isn't a lot right?

A lot of people might call me a weeb or otaku for considering choosing anime over a girlfriend but this is a hobby that I've had for most of my life (since 10)

tl;dr: Gf asks me to give up watching anime from seemingly out of nowhere. Anime is long time hobby of mine. Wut do?

quote:

Just thought I'd give a quick update on my thread from 2 weeks ago.

I talked to her and asked her why she wants me to quit watching anime because she's known I watch it from day 1 of our relationship. As it turns out her parents were very disapproving of anime (her dad is basically a real life version of the asian dad meme) and they were bad mouthing me when they she told them about me and my hobbies. So it turns out that she herself didn't have any problems with me watching anime she just wanted to live up to her parents expectations.

I told her that while I understand where she's coming from she also has to understand that anime is a long time hobby of mine, that it will never get in the way of our relationship, I still get all my responsibilities done and that I will take whatever flak her parents give me when and if I end up meeting them.

I also brought up the possibility of us watching it together. So at the recommendation of another subreddit we started watching Nana together. I'm not really expecting her to suddenly fall in love with anime because of this but it is a nice way to spend time with two things I really love.

tl;dr: Gf didn't really hate anime just trying to meet the expectations of her strict parents. Told her it won't effect our relationship and not to worry about it. Now watching Nana together

darkhand posted:

"stop calling her D"

"Naw"

Seriously, naw is such a great word. Like it has less authority than no. But sometimes the loss of authority points out how preposterous the command was, losing whatever little power the user thought it had.

paco650 posted:

I like that it has a happy ending